My other twin
by Angevelinka
Summary: Namikaze Minato is banished from his own village and stays in Suna on services of Fourth Kazekage. Everything seems to be fine, until one day he spots a crying toddler in the dark cellar. Obviously, nothing can go wrong there, right?... Angst, fluff.
1. Number One

It wasn't anyone's fault, not really.

Only- no, wait. It totally was! It was Yashamaru's fault for not being there and doing his job. It was the kid's fault for not being there to warn him about this. It was the High King and Lord's fault for being a crazy bastard and messing with things he didn't know a thing about, and Suna's fault for being in the middle of the desert where so much heat made his brain go all muddy and sleepy, and the fact he had needed to deliver those papers and Baki as usual was nowhere to be found, and Konoha's fault for betraying him, and sensei's and his Hokage's-

It was his own fault for sticking his hands where he shouldn't have, damn it.

'And why exactly don't you come with a warning?'

The baby looked up at him with large eyes of the limpid color of green peppermint candy and drooled a bit more over the necklace it had taken to his mouth.

It had been another perfectly normal day in Suna.

Naruto hadn't let him sleep at all because he had was teething (and the teeth looked pretty fucking sharp, not-at-all-milk-like teeth for a baby that had been born less than half a year ago) and of course, those frozen baby toys he'd heard so much about apparently were some sort of mythical technological insanity in this God-forsaken village so he had no option but to stay up and try to distract the poor thing as much as he could. Because, like his mother, Naruto didn't seem to get the least bit of peace unless he was constantly the center of attention.

Come morning he had left his son with his sitter reminding the teenage girl he knew where she lived, where her extended family lived and the things he would happily do to all of them should anything happen to Naruto at all, then left to go see what sort of missions he had for the day.

Day was spent, as usual, with him running errands back and forth like some sort of newbie chuunin because the Lord and Master didn't trust him with anything harder (maybe he did notice that even high level jounin like Baki spent more time in the academy on training genin groups than taking missions, but if the village wasn't getting enough income - that was a certain kage's work to fix, and guess what? He wasn't one anymore, so though luck…)

The combination of raw heat, lack of sleep and being treated like a personal assistance without even being paid nearly as much as one had began to work on Minato felt like a foolproof path towards killing migraine; so by the end of the day he was almost looking forward to anyone making some sort of comment toward his person and what might or might not have happened in Konoha to suddenly decide to give their Hokage away just so he'd have an excuse to beat something to bloody pulp.

And Baki, the spoil sporting bastard that he was, seemed to be perfectly aware of this. Before he could go to the briefing room to make himself as painfully noticeable as possible to the largest crowd available so he'd start some cathartic brawl, had caught with him and ordered to send some papers to no one more and no one less than the resident Majesty.

He couldn't say no to the man, who, besides being more or less the only person he had gotten even remotely close in the couple months he had been there (close enough to stop wishing instant death on him for the sole fact he existed, at least) was also his direct superior, and so he had obediently gone away to the biggest one of these weird roundish houses Sunians seemed love so much - and knocked.

When no one answered, he figured he'd just let himself in and drop the papers off, except when he did get inside he was startled by the loud wailing coming from one of the rooms. Without stopping to wonder why the walls would be soundproofed, he'd left the documents on the first piece of furniture remotely acceptable for it and followed the sound towards what seemed to be the cellar.

It was dark, it was dusty and the walls looked like if they needed a fresh coat of paint kind of badly. And in the middle of the relative mess, there, for all appearances, was some sort of stone basinet-thing with a tiny bundle of moving cloth. He knew what it was even before he reached in to remove the blankets, but he stopped to stare all the same.

It was a baby. A very small, very sad crying baby with a small tuft of shocking red hair on top of his head.

'Oh… hey. Hey, little baby.' he had cooed gently, reacting without stopping to think at all- it was a baby, it was crying, no one else was around- what else was he supposed to do? He hadn't slept enough for weeks and the heat made his mind fuzzy after so many hours, it was the father in him who reacted without much prompt.

The baby immediately stopped the wailing, and looked at him. For a long pregnant moment it seemed to be surprised by the fact Minato was there, or maybe surprised at the tone of voice in the silent room. But then, the lips wrinkled once again with a nose and it started crying again, bawling just as loud as before. Only this time it kicked on the dull grey blankets that were already kicked far down the strange cradle and moved the hands up fruitlessly. It was more than obvious it wanted something from him.

The blond winced. One at home and now this?

'Oh, please don't- Yashamaru?'

He knew the chuunin from having occasionally seen him at the debriefing room, more often than not with a cute little blond girl or Desert God's personal mini-me clinging to his proverbial skirts. If there was a kid in this house, it was obviously his job to take care of it.

Alas, there was no answer, and not even the faintest trace of chakra he could feel. If Yashamaru was in home, he was doing a mighty good job of hiding. He'd have to try and resort to reason.

'…coward. Oh, please baby- please stop? I have a headache.'

Red-haired baby didn't seem to be very inclined to be reasonable. So Minato did the only thing he could think of doing.

He didn't think much of the location, because Minato himself had his room in the cellar- it was the place furthest away from the sun and thus his favorite place to exist when he didn't have to be out slowly baking himself alive. To him, it made perfect sense to leave his son where he wouldn't have so much danger of him getting sick from temperature change. In the hypothetical case Naruto could get sick, that is.

He didn't think much of the sand, either. It was Suna. There weren't places in Suna where one didn't have sand- maybe the hospital. And that was a big stretch of _maybe._

He *did* think that if this baby belonged to someone important, getting touchy-feely with it might be misinterpreted as him attempting kidnapping or worse, to follow his made-up reputation after getting exiled from his village, but at this point of the day, getting stabbed to death by confused bodyguards seemed preferable to another second of the distressing crying.

He picked the little thing up, cradling him to his chest, shushing him and, as always, needing to squash that tiny and oh-so-male creepiness he felt whenever he realized how small and breakable such small children really were.

'Why so sad? if anyone has reason to cry here it's me.'

The baby had immediately caught on his shirt once his chest got close on the arm length of a toddler and almost glued itself to him like a magnet. The body shook with a loud wail for a moment, but once Minato spoke, the face that was first hidden in his chest rose up, looking at him like at something very interesting. A bird, or maybe the swirly toy or something just as unimportant but so very, very eyecatching. It let out a wail again, but this time it sounded more like if the kid was unsure if to continue on crying. He breathed heavily though, his face was all covered in snot, so he probably had closed nostrils.

The blond smiled tentatively when the baby stopped, then made a face at the second wail. It wasn't as bad as before though, maybe he could be convinced to get to sleep or something?

'Aw… baby, are you sick?'

At the beginning he had thought someone had been crazy enough to tattoo the baby's eyes like some clans did, but up close he realized the weird marks around the baby's eyes were a dark brown, not black. Bags under his eyes? Did people catch the flu in the desert? The idea the child might have something worse than just feeling lonely briefly passed through his brain, things like quarantine and stuff, but he couldn't muster the energy to worry about it beyond of _maybe Naruto might catch it._ Mortality had stopped being such a big issue some time ago, in ways he tried not to contemplate too often.

What now? He couldn't exactly leave the baby back down- it'd cry again. And if it did have something, he had to ask, he didn't want to risk his son's health.

'Come on, let's get you cleaned.'

The redhead had never stopped looking at him for a moment as the second wail slowly silenced into nothing at Minato's words. Now the pale green eyes had just observed him, still with the same kind of childish awe and surprise as it breathed through the mouth. He hadn't let go of his shirt for a moment, nor did it try to change positions. It only looked at him, all tense.

Ah, blissful silence.

'Thank you, that's very considerate of you.'

Adjusting the meager weight, he took the baby out of the room- if the baby did have something and the whole house had to be quarantined or something… Well, he'd consider it karmic retribution the Kazekage had coming since he decided to accuse all other villages of stealing his sensei.

It took some snooping around the place until he found some baby towels and managed to convince Little Red to stay still enough he could clean his face, and by then, he was exhausted.

'Do you always get left alone like this?' Talking to a pre-toddler probably wasn't very high on the list of checkmarks for sanity, but the baby seemed to like it well enough. 'Just doesn't seem very nice- then again, child abuse in Suna. How shocking.'

He tossed the soiled towel to the trash and just sat down for a moment on the side of the bathtub just closing his eyes and stroking the baby's back. He was small, warm and deliciously quiet. For a moment he thought he'd fallen asleep already, but when he opened his eyes again, Red was staring at him just as wide eyed as before.

'You know, you are very nice, I think I like you.' he said, smiling lightly and stroking a soft cheek. Maybe if he found some place he could like, crawl and collapse a little while before going home, just for an hour… 'Oh, hey, look, a bathtub. Guess it pays to be royalty- are you thirsty, baby? Cause I'm really thirsty.'

Now he just needed to find a glass that wouldn't have poison or scorpions or exploding tags on the rims and water. And he found it very quickly – it was all hidden on the lower shelves of the fridge in the kitchen, described as 'drinkable water' (right behind the 'water with toxic strange-name-in-latin' and next to 'do not drink this' which glowed bright magenta). All clean glasses were held in the cupboards made of sand and glass, along with the plates and bottles for little children.

Baby had still kept observing him like if he was something utterly fascinating beyond belief. It blinked from time to time and moved its head a bit to the sides when the blond started filling the glass to look at it also, but beside that, almost nothing in his shape had changed. He had only squinted an eye when Minato brushed his cheek and closed them both when he was brushed with towel. It didn't react to the back stroking, though all the little muscles had began to finally loose the tension once Minato started petting his back. So now it had been quiet, observing and relaxed – despite his hands that still were curled tightly on his shirt.

This had finally changed when the blond had rose the cup filled with glass to his lips.

Baby had looked at him drinking even more curiously, watching his Adam's apple going up and down, and then suddenly it rose up slightly on the hold and reached for the glass with one hand, little fingers slipping on the slick surface.

'Daa-'

It was first sound that was emitted from it after it had stopped crying.

'Oh, you speak?' he asked, smiling down at the baby and leaning down to give him a light little push with his forehead. 'And here I thought you didn't like me- want a drink?'

He held the glass up, clearly showing the content, close enough for the baby to look at it but not really reach it- it had taken less than a week for Minato understand the local's fanatism for the liquid. Maybe in Konoha you could afford to waste water, but in here, every drop counted, and messy kids would be better off with sippy cups that would minimize how much of it ran down their chins.

The kid had once again squinted it's eyes at the small push, but it didn't react to this with anything else than with a little sound that could mean anything – surprise, annoyance, happiness or just a sound from the vocal chords – and it looked at the glass again, trying to reach out for it.

'Daa-' it said again and then it looked at him, backing down to his previous position with just a tight hold and staring.

'Bubu.'

And it waited.

'Got'cha there. Let's find you something to drink from.' It took considerable less looking around that the towels had caused, because there was a bottle with its detached rubber nipple waiting for him right next to the sink, in the drying rack.

Carefully, given how he was balancing a small baby on one arm and babies -in his limited experience- tended to make the wrong movement and the wrong time as if they liked the idea two or three feet down head first; he passed what was left of the water on his glass to the bottle and added another finger or so from the drinkable bottle, then closed it, offering the newly made bottle to the little redhead.

'There you go baby- water on the rocks without rocks or ice.'

Baby reached out for it with one hand – and watched fascinated as the water in the bottle swirled and puffed up a trail of thin smoke, the temperature of the water rising to the room's degree. Then it had simply steered it to his own mouth and started sucking from it in quick, but calm gulps. After third or fourth sip it had leaned on his chest and looked at him, the bottle now being more touched by his hand than held. The wide opened eyes had finally toned down when the eyelids fell lower. It looked now to be a bit lost in thought, but for the most of it – appreciative.

'Smart baby.'

Adjusting the baby so he was a bit more laying on his back across his arm, which was kind of hard because he didn't seem to want to let his other hand go, Minato decided he might as well sit down and wait until the little thing was done. It wasn't like if he had anything better to do.

There was a library and he probably could do some snooping on it, but it seemed to be so very far away, and it seemed like such a waste, such beautiful silence interrupted only for little baby breaths...

Only a moment later it was interrupted by glass hitting the floor. Suddenly, half of the floor was covered in white substance, shards of the broken bottles and the wet material bag that looked very much like a shopping utensil.

'What the hell are you doing?' shrieked the blond man in apron, looking at him from the distance, half white from horror, even if the light from the outside still shone on his cheeks 'Drop him! Drop him now and back away as fast as you can!'

Minato probably had half dozed off with his eyes half open (harsh technique only shared and learnt by the most suffering of single parents) because he hadn't really taken notice of the other, so he was reasonably startled when suddenly the girly man appeared out of nowhere making a mess and screeching like a banshee.

'…what's wrong with you?' he asked, obviously horrified by the mere suggestion, holding the little redhead closer 'I'm not dropping a baby!'

'What is wrong with me? Are you crazy?' shrieked the blond guy with high pitched tone, now even more paler, looking like if he was about to hyperventilate 'Do you have any idea what you just did? Who allowed you to go to the cellar? Who let you in here- and throw it away I said!'

And with that he had stepped closer, but then backed away, like if he had sudden change of heart. Gaara let out the dummy out of his mouth with a wet 'smack' and for the first time looked at someone else, moving his head on his neck a bit higher so he could see him. The blond man had opened his mouth, pointing at the baby, then at him.

'I-I swear, I'm not responsible for anything-…'

Then he had vanished from the room as he had ran somewhere else in the house. The steps could be heard up the stairs, then down the stairs as he kept running around for who knows what reason.

'I'm not throwing the baby away!' the blond replied, immediately feeling like grabbing the chair and maybe breaking it on the pretty man's face- okay, maybe he was a bit high strung, and maybe he was getting the male equivalent to that scary materialistic feeling, but what sort of human being asked you to toss a baby like a maggoty orange? He didn't make any sort of attempt to stop or follow the man, instead shrugging lightly and giving the baby a light tap on the nose.

'Jeez, you know that creep? Maybe it's better you were alone.'

Green eyes had crossed for a moment, then closed as the baby let out something similar to a huff, maybe even a very light sneeze. But when they opened, his fascination had been shifted around again – this time he found true love for sure – this finger looked so tempting like no thing other things before. He followed it with his eyes and then even proceeded to reach after it, though without such urgency as he did with the water earlier. When his hand was reached out on the right level, he closed his palm into a small fist – and suddenly something exploded above their heads on the other floor.

'Holly hell!' yelled the blond guy somewhere in the other room. 'It's starting again, it's starting, it's starting-'

And he was suddenly back in the room again, with the two of them, thick gloves on his hands, reaching the elbows.

'Give me the kid.' he said with a shaky but stern voice. 'Quickly.'

Minato stared at the man blankly, not making the least bit of an effort to look like if he was inclined to go through the petition.

'Uh… no.' and he turned a little sideways, keeping more of his body between the baby and the man 'I don't think I am.'

He didn't know what sort of crazy things parents did in this village, but in Konoha, you didn't give babies to creepy girly men who liked to play with explosives just because they asked you to.

'Give me it or this monster will shred you to pieces!' yelled the other man, his very thin calmness vanishing in instance. 'You don't know what Kazekage-sama will do once he knows that Gaara had killed yet another stupid nosy chuunin! Give me it if you value your life at least a bit!'

The nervousness of the man had gotten to the kid too as it had stopped playing with Minato's finger and looked up with widened eyes behind the blond. The other man, seeing the opening, had lunged for the kid, a kunai appearing in his hand in defense.

And this was entirely too close home a thing to do, entirely too much like so many things that had gone too wrong too fast. And that's why Yashamaru went straight past dispelling smoke only to feel a kick on the middle of his back. Minato straightened carefully, the baby still held close.

'I'm not a chuunin.' he said calmly, his tone maybe a degree or two above glacial. 'And if you value *your* life you won't ever try to have a go at me when I have a baby in my arms again.'

The other man had only looked up at him with fright and hadn't moved up from the fall. Not a chuunin? Oh shit.

'Are you… are you here to steal him?' he muttered. Great now if another village stole their unstable jinchuuriki the Kazekage would go ballistic. Not to mention that he'd kill him, and what would there be left of him and Karura in the village in the end? Nothing. 'You don't know what are you doing… It will kill you in the middle of the way…'

Minato stared at him blankly.

Girly man… didn't know who he was. Clearly, some sunanin were imitating the wildlife and living under rocks.

'Yes, I'm going to steal him.' he said in his flattest, most blank tone. 'That's why I cleverly sitting in the middle of the well-illuminated kitchen and giving the baby a bottle. Clearly that was part of my brilliant part of escape.'

Yashamaru smiled at that, with a very unsure move of muscles. Oh, he got it. This man was simply out of his mind. Maybe he lost his child somewhere and went crazy and once he had heard crying Gaara something had to click in his brain and he got inside to play with it. Such things happened. But wasn't the walls supposed to be soundproof?

Either way, it was a miracle that he was still alive.

'Okay… I understand…' he said, slowly getting up, this time not letting go the man out of his sight 'That was very nice of you, Gaara surely doesn't get treated like that very often… but now that you have done it can you please give it back to me? I will put it back into the cradle.'

Minato looked from the man, to weird glove things he held on his hands. Okay, maybe the baby was sick, given how the man was acting and the things he said, but still.

'With due respect… you aren't the first person I'd trust a baby with.'

Which was really strange, because the two or three times he had seen the man on his way, the other two kids always seemed to look well looked after. Maybe he just had a thing against redheads? Kushina had gone through a lot of that when they were little. Yashamaru winced at those words. Oh, yes, he was the stubborn one. Why make it any easier on him, right, gods?

'I know that I may not look like it, but you have to give it to me.' he said with the calmest tone he could muster up in such situation. Gaara looked vaguely interested in everything and quite calm – unlike when he left him to buy him milk – but that didn't mean he wouldn't want to throw a tantrum in any given moment 'This is really important. The baby can't stay with you like that.'

With that, he took a tentative step forward, trying to look as little threatening as possible. Who knew what that 'not chunnin' man could do.

'Please. It matters a lot to me.'

'Okay, sure.' Minato said agreeably 'I'll give him to his parents.'

And then have some words with them about proper way of taking care of their kids.

'Oh, that-' said the blond, sweating even more now as he curled his hands into fists and held close to chest 'I really can't- I'm not sure it's a good thing…'

The Kazekage was out on a walk with his other kids having 'family time'. Those were one of those things that weren't specified to bits so he couldn't really tell when they would be back. Sometimes they were gone even for the whole day and it was useless for him alone to search for them. He jumped from one feet to another, looking at the redhaired baby and the man glaring at him distrustingly. It didn't seem like he had any other choice.

'I'm sorry- I will be right back.' he said, pointing out the 'right back' with his finger 'Don't move from here… don't move at all… or… just wait.'

And with that, he had ran through the kitchen door. And if the man was dead once he would get back? Well. It was his choice to do this, right? Nobody really missed the crazy ones anyway.

Minato gave the other man a slight nod and waited for him to go away before shaking his head lightly. He looked down at the baby, who was clinging to him as calmly and docilely as he had from the beginning.

Taking hold of the bottle, he offered it to the baby again, resuming his seat on the chair.

'Little Red, you hang out with the weirdest crowd.'

Yashamaru heard that, but he didn't react to it. Thanks to his luck, the first thing he saw when he turned around the next building was the kazekage himself with both of his kids.

'Kazekage-sama!' he breathed out, not really out of breath yet 'Oh, thanks gods, Kazekage-sama!...'

'Good evening, Yashamaru.' said the other man, nodding to him as he slowly walked down the road 'Don't sweat yourself, we're only back for couple of things and we're going back at the very same moment.'

'Father wants to show us how to catch a wild desert dog!' piped out Kankuro, jingling with his legs as he was the one sitting on the arm of the kage. Temari simply walked hand in hand with him.

Yashamaru smiled, begging for mercy. It was a bit unfair he had to interrupt this time that happened now at even rarer and rarer occurrences.

'I'm sorry, but there's a problem.' he muttered and lifted up Temari without even asking for her opinion. Beside a little yelp, the girl hadn't opposed. 'We have to hurry up. Please.'

Daichi slowly rose up his eyebrows, then frowned.

'Problem?' he asked, his voice cold as ice suddenly 'What problem?'

And the last one was an angry bark. Holly hell, the problems with that brat again? And he was having such a nice unstressful time! It was the last thing he wanted to hear about. Yashamaru winced and bowed as deeply as holding a kid let him.

'Please, come with me.'

And they had spun into a run.

In house, Gaara had only looked up at Minato, the content gaze once again shown in his eyes as he had started sucking on the water. It was warm and cuddly like that and he could drink water all he wanted, so it felt almost too good, something he hadn't experienced from… he didn't know. His concept of time still wasn't formed within his head. But now was good after long time of bad.

He smacked his lips as he finally let go of the bottle and let out a small burp, feeling now sated and full. His eyes slowly drifted open and close, blinking drowsily. He felt safe. From everything.

The sand on the floor rattled like if the wind blew through it, even if there was no wind inside the house. Then it jumped at the step of invisible and unheard elephant, because there was no possibility something like that could happen without something big falling nearby. But it did and there was nothing big falling around. Minato immediately was up, holding the baby up close and looking around for the source- curious, but still calm.

Gaara opened his sleepy eyes at the jump, not really trying to spot anything, unlike Minato. After a moment of looking up at the blonde, he let out a sound that seemed to be a cross between 'muu' and 'naa' and put the thumb into his mouth.

The walls _shifted_.

'Yeah, okay, this is weird.' the blond said, moving away from the walls, still keeping the baby as close as possible. Did he know why the building was acting like if it were on an acid trip? No. But Minato was a very pragmatic person. Why wasn't really that important- at least not until he was somewhere safe when he could actually afford to wonder about such things.

'Baby, I think we are going to be waiting for your parents outside or something- so when I get accused of kidnapping, please try to put a good word for me, okay?'

The baby didn't even try to look like if it heard what he said, as even steps Minato took toward the door were lulling. Its eyelids had dropped a level, then two and then…

And then the door had opened with a bang, startling it. At the same time, the shower of sand fell down from the ceiling, covering the ground with a thin layer of dust. Strangely, baby didn't seem to be even touched by a single grain.

Minato covered the baby as much a she could from the sudden sand downpour, not understand what the hell was going on and wondering if maybe he should just teleport back home or something- he could drop the kid with Baki, he'd know what to do.

'There he is! Right there!' sounded the known voice of an already panicking blond, though not as nervous as it was before. 'Look out, the sand is already everywhere!-'

It seemed like great idea and a sensible plan, except he didn't think the parents would appreciate it- and sure enough, Yashaidiot was back and already accusing him of something or other- his nearly gone headache started throbbing back in place.

Additional pair of footsteps could be heard as someone else moved in silence, but then, it was overpowered but two quick steps of someone else. A moment later, two little kids, a boy and a girl had ran into the room, both looking sad and angry.

'It's all your fault again!' screamed the kid with a very simple paint on his face 'I hope you die, die, die, die!'

The girl had only threw something that looked like a stone from the outside at the man, but she missed with aim and hit the wall behind him instead. Maybe it was because her eyes were full of tears. Minato sidestepped running kids- oh, look, so that was where the other little kids were- what was going on here anyway? Gaara had woken up and looked at both of them, his look drowsy and a bit annoyed, not really seeming to be interested. The answer soon followed.

'Kids! Outside!' barked an angry male voice, making both kids turn on their heels and run out of the room (not without giving the baby a harsh glare one more time) and then a kunai with a very long exploding tag had landed on the opposite wall, sizzling with a very loud, unnatural for such things disturbing buzzing that made the baby shift in the hold. At first lightly, then more, as sign of annoyance had showed upon the roundish face. Soon, highly unpleasant smell followed, making the redhead let out a stressful wail.

Obviously, the smell of sea salt mixed with chlorine and marron glace didn't get on well with its nerves.

'Out of the house, now-!' sounded in the background along with the door closing and then the room was entered with two things. First one was a very strong flashlight made of some sort of crystal, that fell on the baby's face, making it squirm at the bright light and make a litany of unhappy sounds. The second was the persona of Fourth Kazekage, whom had looked extremely grief at the situation.

Minato noticed it wasn't an exploding tag right away- exploding tags kind of exploded, after all… and even if the smell wasn't the most palatable of things, it was better than the torn limbs. Carefully, he cradled the baby close to shield him of the smell as much as possible. Just as he was about to make the seal to teleport away, the last thing he expected to happen occurred.

'I'm waiting for explanation.' The redhead said simply as he shone the light on Minato's face for a second and got it back on the redhead again.

'Oh, God, not you…' he groaned, voice low and creaky.

Apparently, his migraine was back. And look, it brought friends. How thoughtful.

How many times had he talked with the man? Two. First to say hi when his sensei and the other ANBU had first brought him there with the Hokage, second maybe an hour or so after. It was a lovely social meeting including the whole of Suna's council informing him how according to treaty and deals some more legalistic written bullshit Suna now legally owned him and if he moved out of the village without permission or ever left Wind country at all, ever, for any circumstances, period, they had Konoha's permission to treat him as missing nin and kill him on the spot or bring him back for torture.

Understandably, High Lord and Master of the village wasn't high on his list of favorite people- maybe a step or two below his own village, but just barely.

He plastered a big, pleasant and very fake smile on his face and gave the man a slight bow.

'Ah, sorry, Kazekage-sama. That wasn't really supposed to come out loud.'

The man's eyebrow had twitched, but ever so slightly. He didn't bother to even change his position, only angled his hand more so it would hit Gaara's eyes with disturbance. The baby let out a tired wail, something that sounded like 'let me sleep' if it came from anything older than it. Then it started blubbing, bit by bit. Daichi didn't seem to be bothered by that at all.

'What wasn't supposed to come out loud?' he muttered, watching the blond holding the kid like if it was something dear to him 'What do you think you're doing with my son?'

Minato looked back at the baby, automatically reaching to push the flashlight thing away because the thing was blinding him from the reflection only- well… The Kazekage definitely didn't have green eyes, but he hadn't seen an exact plethora of redhead in town- and the man might not have Kushina's strange berry-like coloration, but that dark brick-like color probably gave him ample qualification to fit the troupe. The babies was somewhat redder, though, but still-

'I thought you only had two kids.'

'And I thought I have forbidden anyone to enter private rooms of my house to everyone beside my own family.' answered the man curtly, lightly angling the light so it once again hit the baby straight in the face, making it protest audibly against such treatment. Something had moved on the other floor, making for a brief second catch the man's attention, but not for long. He looked at the blond again. 'As far as I know, neither you are my family nor is his place in the public hall. What are you doing with this?'

The younger man didn't seem excessively preoccupied by the Kazekage's tone, only narrowed his eyes lightly and automatically started stroking the baby's back again.

'If by 'this' you mean 'this' baby, it was crying when I got in. And I got in because that's what my orders were.'

And Baki's order's had been oh so very specific, in the sense that they were simply 'deliver this to Kazekage-sama's house'.

The Kazekage had only sneered at him.

'It shouldn't be any of your concern if it was crying or dancing cancan. By taking it you had breached my privacy and put yourself in the grave danger putting me in the very uncomfortable situation of breaking the contract I made with your village, Hokage-sama.'

The last word was taunting and actually very sarcastic – Daichi didn't hold very much respect to the blond man once he became a soldier on his services. It wasn't because he had lost his title, no – actually, this, he found both respectable and courageous; it meant that the man was aware of that he didn't deserve it and that he had guts to become an exile to his own village – something a lot considered an instant death as there was nothing worse than being homesick. And of course, nothing more shameful, especially for a kage.

But then, he couldn't respect him for that; it was all because of the ambiguous reasons this had happened. He heard about Nine Tails, of course he did and he swallowed it as he had bad experience with that alone. But it still wasn't a good reason for him. Namikaze was a hero, not a criminal – he saved the village. There was no reason for him to get away from his home now. And he was quite a lad, so there was also no reason to not try to find someone to help him with some personal issues too. But all he did was getting away and living alone. Daichi considered trying to seduce him, one time or another, when he would have time and occasion (which he had all the time since he had him on his services). But not now.

He looked down at the baby.

Gaara was still sniffing and obviously uncomfortable as the buzzing sound pierced ears of all of them, not to mention the fact that the room was becoming more and more unbearable with the smell, but he had managed to turn around and hide his face in the chest of the blue-eyed nanny and his flashlight was useless now. With a quick move he put it down on the desk, making the baby startle at the sound. He couldn't let him calm down like that.

'I don't remember Baki commanding people to take care of crying babies in case of boredom. I could accuse you of spying.'

'Minato.' the blond replied in the same exact tone, as if all he had said afterwards or his obvious anger were completely unimportant. 'Namikaze Minato.'

Because if the redhead wanted to play dense with him, then so be it, he had the superior genetic advantage having been born a natural blond.

'Yes, Namikaze Minato.' said Daichi distractedly, then frowned even more. The man was simply avoiding the confrontation. Then be it. 'Don't you have anything else to say to that?'

The blond's smile widened a fraction of an inch.

'I'm very sorry, sir.'

The redhead looked at him in complete silence, his face growing cold and distant. He wasn't sorry and it was obvious.

'Don't think that because you were a hokage you will avoid the consequences.' he muttered, reaching out his hands 'Breaking into the private possession, taking kage's son without permission, meddling with the top secret information and even putting yourself in the dangerous position – this will cost you a degradation or two. Now, give me the brat.'

And this time it took effort, actual conscious effort not to burst into completely inappropriate laughter. Degradation? Degradation of what?

How could he be any more degraded than this? They had taken everything from him, every little thing that mattered had been painfully torn from him- they had taken away from him his lover, his title, his role, they had thrown him away from his home and to this living oven- this Behemotic monstrosity of heat and sand that didn't seem to ever *end*.

And he was going to die here. No matter what he did, no matter what happened, he would never be able to go back where he belonged. Wordlessly, he shifted his hold on the tiny body and gently tried to pull it away.

Gaara at first didn't move, as he just kept laying there, slowly calming down in the warm embrace, even if the smell was still unbearable. But at the pull, green eyes opened wide and looked up at him, startled. The breath had immediately grew more rapid, making the tiny lungs work faster.

It didn't understand what was going on, but the movement was clearly indicating that it was being taken away from the source of its comfort. Automatically, the small fingers clasped on the shirt like claws and when he was pulled at that, his face squinted, becoming pink in frustration.

It didn't want to be taken away from the comforting hold. The other things were much, much worse and it didn't know anything else.

'Naa!...' and there was the quiet, but steadily rising voicement of protest. The sand from the floor had jumped suddenly up and down and started jiggling nervously.

Kazekage's eyes had widened.

'Take off the shirt. Now.' he said and caught the baby without a trait of gentleness, like a tool to give it support for the man to take the thing down. Gaara protested at that also with a louder wail. Two paintings fell off the wall as the sand punched at them without any reason and explanation.

Minato didn't listen, pulling away from the man automatically in an effort to protect the baby. What the hell was going on? Earthquake? Did one even get earthquakes in here? But no, the sand was jumping in weird patterns- so it couldn't be wind either.

Jutsu? There was the legendary iron sand, but it didn't smell or look like iron- or at least didn't looked, because if he were able to smell anything over the growing stench, he deserved the Inuzukas to formally adopt him or something- no; it seemed like perfectly normal sand.

Perfectly normal sand rippling on the floor and punching at the walls.

'What the hell.'

The redhead had looked at it with the corner of the eye and wasn't very happy also. The sand was getting nervous and the whole situation was becoming strained. The blond was also not helping, as he didn't even go by the orders as any ninja did, but simply decided to be distracted by what he saw. Without losing a moment he lunged back at the kid and grabbed it, pulling at the weak hands with much more strength that it was actually needed (ah well, at the worst he will just tear that awful shirt anyway…), but when he thought he had succeeded, the sand had suddenly shot from the floor and knocked him in the chin, making him fall backwards.

And then, instead of dancing on the floor, it had started accumulating on the blond. Obvious choice; Gaara was now hanging only on his hands on the material of the shirt and cried like if he was being skinned alive.

Gods, what a day. But he couldn't help but only sit and stare.

When the sand attacked the redhead, Minato immediately jumped back, still shielding the toddler- the Kazekage could take care of himself, baby couldn't. At the very least this solved the question of if he had taken something he shouldn't have and was having the acid trip of his life- as far as he knew, hallucinations didn't knock other people on their ass.

The problem with the not-hallucination was that it suddenly decided to make a very passable imitation of a shark and go at him- at which point Minato decided this particular headache would live to the name of Kazekage-junior.

The sand clashed into a puff of smoke, not even giving it time to dispel but smothering it to the floor while the blond reappeared next to the Kazekage, grabbing him under the arm and pulling him back up, fully intending to drag him somewhere where the walls weren't plotting their demise.

The sand didn't let him though. It immediately lunged at the linked hands and tossed the kazekage like a doll, making him literally kiss the wall, even if he had managed to reach his hands and legs to only land on the surface – and then it had started covering the baby, pushing it tightly against the man's chest and weighting it to the floor like if it had gained weight in extra tempo. Surprisingly, the more sand was there, the quieter the redhead child became.

Minato tried to shield the baby as much as he could, but the problem was that the sand was *everywhere* so there was no running away from it. He tried to stand, but when he did, the sand weighted down on him more, and in this position, the first thing it would squish was the frail tiny ribcage.

'I'm getting out of here-' he announced out loud for anyone who cared, which right now probably was just the main jail or in residence.

'No!' No, stay where you are!' shouted the other redhead, pointing at him with a finger as he tried to stand up from the fall. It would go smoothly, but his long robe didn't really help. 'If you will go out in the open, he will suffocate you!'

And without even waiting for an answer, he had ran close to the big ball of sand that formed on Minato's hands and put a paper seal on it, dodging a punch that aimed at his back.

'Release!'

And all the sand in the room froze in the blink of an eye. But it didn't come off. Gaara had only looked up at the blond and then patted at one frozen trail of sand with curiosity.

'Daaa.'

It didn't like when sand froze, but seeing something like that from close was always so much interesting it couldn't help but try to do something to it. Without a word, baby rose up and gnawed at it with toothless gums, drooling all over Minato's shirt. The blond looked back, blinking fist at the sand, then at the baby. After a moment or two of quiet contemplation, he turned to look at the redhead.

'At the risk of sounding like a spy plotting village domination- I wouldn't say no to some explaining.'

Daichi had only winced at that and then had only looked at the baby with a tired glance. A moment later he had simply took the chair from the nearest table and sat on it, relaxing for a moment. It seemed like if he intended on doing it for longer than a minute or two.

'Gaara.' he said, pointing at the frozen ball of sand 'Meet Hokage-sama of Konoha.' he muttered. Then he pointed at the an. 'Namikaze Minato-san' he moved the palm toward the kid that kept playing with the string of frozen sand, but still looked after his finger. It seemed to be prone of following moving things very much 'Meet One tailed Shukaku, the jinchuuriki of Suna.'

Actually, he should have done it the other way – first introduce kid to the older, but he really didn't feel like it. To put it simple - screw savoir vivre.

Minato stared, his brain seeming to take a mercifully long time stringing the significances with their corresponding significant.

'The baby is a jinchuriki.' he said after a moment, his voice almost academic in its calmness. The redhead had only made a gesture of hand, obviously wanting to say something, but his words failed him. There was no other way to really put it.

'The baby is a jinchuuriki.' he repeated. 'That's why you don't snoop around here.'

'You sealed a bijuu in your baby.' The blond continued after a moment of quiet contemplation '…and the seal you used was shit.'

'Old shit.' The man corrected him. But how he was supposed to know it was shit? He had never used anything like that before and really… who did? The research Second Kazekage did was incomplete and since he had died suddenly no one ever was there to pass on his league. He was moving like a blind in the dark. He did the best he could. In the end it wasn't enough. Somehow, he didn't feel like telling all that to the blond. What was done was done, and he had already suffered for many of his sins since then. 'Nobody knows what went wrong and nobody can't help it. Don't judge me.'

'You are despicable.'

Daichi had shifted on his seat, looking at the blond. The man didn't seem to be reacting but he thought he heard something… But then Gaara had gurgled upon the blond, wanting his attention, and it was much louder than what he…

Heard?

It was probably his own mind judging him again for all he had done. Slowly, his face bleached into a dim grey. He was so sick of himself sometimes at the moments like those.

'It was a mistake.' Daichi said instead 'But I live with it. And I will either burn your memory or seal your mouth shut under the threat of taking your life. Gaara is a top secret information and I'd rather hold him in hiding as long as I can. Forever, if it's possible.'

'I see.'

Minato wasn't looking at him. He wasn't looking at anything in particular. He didn't really seem to be paying attention, either, his words more like a way to let the man he was listening just so he wouldn't have to diver his attention from… well, wherever it was now. And it was far away, to what had happened in this country several months ago.

He had heard, of course, everyone had heard - Suna had tried to get a jinchuriki to raise their village's prestige and manpower. Almost all villages had one or two, and yes, some were missing and some were lost, but they still belonged to their countries. Suna didn't have a large enough army, and the war had wiped its resources and left it embittered with most nations. It wasn't a good political situation, and maybe if they hadn't been living in the middle of the biggest oven in this side of the globe they would have gotten invaded several times over in the past three years.

As it was, no one seemed to really care about this village in this very accurate version of hell. Especially not potential clients. Supply and demand wasn't a very hard concept - Suna had very few, very high quality shinobi at their disposal, and that made it a lot more expensive that, let's say, Konoha, who nearly tripled its population and- before the Kyuubi attack, at least- had several ninja at different rank and a system that made efficient use of practically every level.

It was much cheaper to hire two Konoha chuunin for a simple bodyguard job than get a Suna jounin. The more people heard of this, the more they migrated to cheaper alternatives, to the point that Suna's reputation was hardly worth a mention. It had been a matter of time before the village sunk into depression for purely economical reasons and disappeared into a big pile of sand.

And then, Suna suddenly had a jinchuriki. Yes, really, they did! A bloody deity born from demented wind and sand that fed on blood of its enemies. The legendary perfect protection.

On a minor note, the Kazekage's wife had died.

How old was this baby again? Because Minato wouldn't have been surprised if he had been born the very same day his mother had died.

This man had willingly used his wife to bargain with unnatural monstrosities and allowed them to possess his son. Maybe it was a good thing he was pinned down like that. If he hadn't, Minato might have probably made a very serious attempt on the Kazekage's life.

'Now what.' he said instead, voice a low monotone.

The man had only shrugged, for a moment looking like if he had given up on the world. Then he had pinched the bridge of his nose and made a scowl at nothing in particular.

'We can go to the cellar and try to get him off you, and then lock him until he calms down.' he said, looking at the baby 'Or we can wait when he decides to let you go and then carry him to his… oh I forgot that you have his cradle here.' he said, gesturing at the blond's hands. Then he sighed.

'This can't last for long though, the seal will only work for a few hours. And if you let him sleep, he will turn fully into a monster and will go on a rampage.'

He smiled at this like if he had something very nice and touching, almost warming, but his nostrils worked like if he had went through the marathon.

'I can't freeze sand on him endlessly. This takes too much chakra.'

And he really didn't know what to do about that man. Nobody could know about it in the village or the panic would strike. People will emigrate – or they will begin a strike and then either he slaughters them or high classed Anbus will come for his life or maybe Gaara would just have a feast of the year. Either way, civil war would be a clear end of this village. And people really were not far away from rising their voices. Even for raw humans, like Sunanins, the life became really hard to bear last years.

The blond nodded again, but it was just for show. He was listening this time, but at the same time he wasn't really paying attention to what the other said. There was a baby in his arms. This baby was pretty much what every nightmare he had had in the past half year amounted to - a small, unreasonable little container for a monster itching for some carnage.

Kushina hadn't been turned into a jinchuriki until the last one had been reaching the end of her natural life, and even then, her clan had trained her for it- Kushina had been _prepared_ for the burden that had been showed on her. She had already had extensive training on sealing methods and a basic understanding of how to control chakra. She had basic training as a ninja and members of her family and professionals at her disposal in case anything went wrong. Babies didn't even have a notion of how to control their sphincters.

Sealing methods varied in all the villages, but in general, people knew well enough to wait until the future container had a chance to learn something as basic as to how to control the unnatural chakra pouring into their system. But he could understand the basic thought process behind the idea of possessing an infant. It was simple, while the host grew, it would do so with a natural and instinctive understanding of how to use the bijuu. It was simple, and in theory, efficient. It was risky as hell. He had no other option but to seal their own monster into his son, and if there had been any other way, any alternate option at all- if he had had any chance of housing the thing himself instead of burdening their child with it- Minato would have done it.

Because if they had missed anything, if they had miscalculated to the slightest detail, if there had been the slightest margin of error… Well. This baby was what would have happened. Slowly, he leaned his head back on the floor with a small, quiet thump, blue eyes staring at the ceiling unblinkingly.

'These things only happen to me.'


	2. Number 2

Why? Didn't the universe feel like if he had had enough already? Because he did- he was sure, convinced, certain and absolutely one hundredth percent positive that he had had _enough_ already. He didn't deserve what was happening.

But before the Kazekage had come at him like a proverbial fury, the baby hadn't done anything dangerous.

'First things first- get me out of under here.'

The red-haired man had looked at him for a long quiet moment, and then he finally stood up.

'I can only do that if you can endure the hit of a very heavy hammer.' he said, picking up one of the little pieces the sand froze into 'This is no usual dust, when it's trailing around it acts like sand, but when it's used for protection, it hardens at least thirty times, if not more.'

He remembered how one time one of a rookie ninja panicked in the room of crying Gaara. He was a newbie, quite good as said the rumors and he had taken him in only because Baki asked him for that – distant cousin or something. He warned the kid it was no play and that he was going to stand face to face with a bloodlusting beast, but the brat didn't listen. Probably the image of Gaara, whose eyes were still blue that day, looked like if he couldn't hurt a fly, even if he really, really tried. All came down to the diaper change in the middle of the night. He assisted there to see if the new workers could to that, and the boy didn't pass the test. He did something wrong – either he brushed some scalded off skin that Gaara usually had at young years because at first it was hard to change the diaper as often as it was needed – or maybe simply looked threatening to the baby – and the bucket of sand flew just in front of the boy. It had barely touched his hands – but it was enough for him to scream in terror and throw a giant axe at the baby. He was halfway to the table when the weapon had stopped inches from the baby's face, all its weight and power cutting only by a thin, barely three centimeters layer of sand and not even making it through more than a millimeter.

Of course, he fired him and bound to the village under the promise of heavy punishment, sewing his mouth shut. But the experience stayed.

'But if you are patient, I can try to tear it off layer by layer.'

'Call me paranoid, but if the baby didn't like the way you held it, I doubt it'd like you to come at it with a hammer.'And he was kind of attached to all of the limbs the sand was wrapped around. They didn't really deserve being either skinned alive or ripped off because the baby was startled after only a bit over two decades of service.

'Guess I'm in no hurry- no, wait, I am.' he winced at that, wishing he could pry a hand off to brush at his face 'My son- my son's at my house.' And if anything happened to him, Naruto was getting shipped back to Konoha, and God's knew what they would do to him there. '…How long is this going to take?'

He didn't like sounding helpless like this, but he thought that he was allowed to feel a bit depressed, all things considered.

'You're in no hurry as long as you have my son in your hands.' muttered the Kazekage as he rounded the blonde on the floor and a few other strange shapes that the sand had formed before freezing still. 'This will take maybe an hour, maybe three. No longer than ordinary waiting in queue for me to get your scrolls.'

And with that, he closed the door and walked away in search for energy pills. He didn't like them because they pulled at his strength with force, leaving him oddly dizzy afterwards, but if he wanted to work on the hard sand, he had to eat one. Minato glared after the Kazekage, wishing for rather dark and original things unto his person. Things like vivisections and strange ritualistic tortures of the sort. Because there was what he considered to be a very small girl in charge of his very, very small, very precious son, and now that he didn't have a chance to actually go check on him, his paranoia seemed to have tripled in just a moment, and the older redhead was doing nothing to help him with it.

'Between you and me, I think I might hate your father.'

Thankfully, Daichi didn't hear him.

'Baki, you will be needed to crush the frozen sand.' he muttered to communicator he caught on the way as he chewed on the mouldy dry pill. His strength came back, even if his muscles didn't really want it to be there. The communicator let out a screech and shut off. When he was down, Baki was already there, looking in silence at the ball of sand and the man under it.

'Should I ask what's happened?'

'Itchy hands, that's all.' he answered and sat down, catching the man by the shoulders and pulling him up. When the Kazekage came back, Minato gave the other man trailing a light smile, as if he hadn't been caught pinned to the floor with a very dangerous baby strapped to his chest by hibernating sentient sand.

'Hello, Baki-san. I'm never doing you any favors again.' Not that it was the mans' fault he was here. Well, it was. Partially. If he thought long enough about it, everyone was a bit to blame about this…

A moment later he was sitting on the sofa and both ninjas gradually sent their chakra into the sand – freezing it and then cooking it to the point of melting, so the layers had cracked – and then they simply tore them off. Much to be said, the things came off in thin as three strings of hair put together.

Gaara didn't like that much.

'Uwuu…' it mumbled, looking both distressed and annoyed at the way temperature rose and fell around him, each time a bit more closer and a bit more unbearable. At first it was only a bit chilly and warm, but then it became more and more pushed up and down. It tried to crawl out of the hiding, but once he saw that there was Kazekage nearby, he hid himself deep in it again and just looked at Minato, his eyes showing scare and indecisiveness.

It wasn't exactly painful- just long and boring and annoying and the longer it took, the more he worried about his son. Naruto wasn't old enough to be aware that he was taking longer than usual to get back to the house they were occupying, was he?

And what about his sitter? Would she just leave him there, considering her shift over, despite Minato's threats on what he'd do to her and her family? Desperately needing something to focus on- and given how the so very talky and social frowny sunanin hovering over him were doing such wonders for conversation (only not), he looked down at what kept squirming against his chest. Despite the danger of the situation and what had happened, he was far from pleased at the unease he detected.

'Aw, don't be so sad, baby.' he said gently, giving the little redhead what he hoped was a reassuring smile 'I'm in a far worse situation and you don't see me complaining, do you?'

Gaara didn't seem to be very reassured by that; actually, he didn't even react to the words, he just kept on observing the man and his moving mouth and sat curled in his hiding, still clutching at the blonde's shirt tightly.

'I don't see you missing limbs or bleeding to death, so don't act like if you were in really pressuring situation.' said the Kazekage instead, tearing yet another layer of sand. As the time passed, the sand had softened a bit so it came now with thicker layers. 'And if you really can't sit still because of your kid I can send some free messenger to check on him.'

'Satetsu is off duty.' Immediately added Baki, heatening the sand on his side. The ball slowly lost the circular shape.

He was about to reply something tart about how the man in his personal space definitely qualified as a distressing situation, but the man's next words stopped him. For a moment, he contemplated being drugged off his ass again, surely the bastard in command hadn't just made a pretty decent proposition for him? He almost immediately agreed, but just as he was opening his mouth to agree, an odd, guarded expression crossed his eyes.

'That would be very kind of you.' he said instead, his tone carefully neutral. '…if you get my arm off, I can just teleport away.'

It wouldn't solve how to get the baby off of him, but the immediate problem of the sand could be dealt with faster that way.

'With my kid? No.' answered the redhead, looking up at him for a moment 'Gaara can't leave this place. There will be no stopping him if he goes out to the endless amount of sands.'

'I *can* teleport two inches from here, you know?' the younger man said drily.

Daichi looked up at him with a frown. Then, without a word he caught the upper part of the ball and pulled at it with all his strength, making Gaara meep in horror as the surface suddenly cracked. A moment later the ball cracked in the most thin side and the piece of sand fell down onto the floor.

'You'd better not be lying or you will spend the rest of the day with only Baki freeing you. I pulled on my muscle.'

The blonde couldn't help but wince when the older man did that- being unable to struggle had left him with only a vague idea of how much the thing had hardened really, but the sound the sand made when it cracked- yeah, it was as hard as the redhead had told him.

'Sorry.'

He had no reason to apologize over anything, but that had had to hurt, and besides, taking it back would be senseless. Instead looked now at the revealed baby and after extracting his hand of the rest of the sand with only minimal scraps, ran a hand experimentally down his back.

'Hello.'

Baby, who had been watching the older redhead now with terrified gaze, immediately looked up at the blonde and blinked, feeling the soothing touch on its back. It felt very nice, so it relaxed a bit. But when the man let out a louder sigh as he started massaging his arm, Gaara once again looked at him and tensed – it was almost like if he was about to leap from there, only he didn't have muscles to even crawl on the floor yet, his well being only adjusted to rolling from the back to the front and backward.

Minato followed the baby's gaze, looking first at the redhead, and then at his arm, feeling a vague and rather annoying sort of guilt about it, but quickly shrugging it off- he would have done the same if he were in the man's position-

No, no wait. If he had been in the man's position, he would have put a giant sign saying 'DO NOT TOUCH' on the baby. Just in case. Sighing to himself, he gave the baby one last stroke, then slapped hand on the floor, right between the jounin and the older redhead. A hand seal later, the taller blonde was in the exact same place he had marked a moment ago, one arm back to supporting the baby's weight while the other steadied his back.

'Close enough?'

Daichi had looked at him again, this time without a frown. The sand rolled onto the floor, but it was caught by the other jonin before it made hole in the carpet.

'Close enough.' muttered the Kazekage as he stopped massaging his arm. It didn't hurt that much, only he hadn't done something like that since some time and he still had to carry the kid to it's room. 'I assume you want to go home now.'

For a moment, he had the oddest urge to grin. He smiled down at baby instead.

'That would be nice, if that's an available option.'

The other man didn't do that. Instead, his lips thinned into a very bitter line.

'It's only a possibility.' he muttered, watching his son. 'I have enough of you, brat.'

With that, he had grabbed Gaara under the arms and pulled. In answer, the baby screamed out startled and all paintings from the eastern wall fell as half of the wall suddenly crumbled, turning into a sand that aimed at the older redhead. This time he had made a miss and the sand simply drilled through the sofa.

'Ah no, forgive me.' Daichi said as he stood up, seeing as the thin layer of sand once again landed on the blonde, making him look like if he was covered in dust 'It seems it's not possible.'

'Nuh!' added the baby angrily and it frowned. Baki didn't seem to be impressed.

'I will make coffee then.'

Minato ruffled his hair to clear out the dust, then sneezed as result, looking down at the frowny little redhead clinging to him like a limpet and then at his father's own scowling face, feeling a completely inappropriate bout of laughter bubbling up his chest. Suddenly he was seeing a whole lot more family resemblance between the two.

'Maybe it's a good idea for you to get that person to look after Naru. Apparently, I'm not going back there any time soon.' If ever.

Daichi's shoulders had finally fell, as he looked at the pair. It seems it was done. His son had found his true love and was thinking about spending the rest of life with him – and that was very sad because he had considered it a future one night stand. Not that he was very attached, but it was some loss.

'I will tell Satetsu to bring Maki with him, she will provide for maternity material or something.' he said then he had simply waved off Gaara as he couldn't really look at him anymore. It was supposed to be a nice day of family time – including catching wild dingos, playing on audible dunes and maybe even watching the snow fall. Instead he was having family time with a kid he'd rather see once a year if ever. What he didn't see was that the sand that was on Minato rose and waved him off with exactly the same gesture, even forming a copy of his hand, including all his rings.

'Honey?' asked Baki from the kitchen. In Suna people didn't use sugar – it was too expensive.

At the hand appearing, the blonde made a disgusted sound in the back of his throat and flexed his shoulders in an attempt to make the thing get off, rather relieved when it disappeared after a moment. Then he looked back at the baby.

Gaara had still looked after the walking away kage, frowning, then his attention went back to the blonde – once again he was staring at him like at utterly fascinating phenomenon.

No way… the baby was too young to understand the gesture. That meant the bijuu was at a high enough level of sentience… But if it was, why didn't it downright attack the Kazekage? It had to know he was the one with the ability to stop him, and yet it had lashed at everything- the floor, the walls… It only went explicitly for the older redhead when the little one was severely startled. The oddest part was that it stopped after a few tries on his person.

Imperfect sentience? That didn't make sense.

'…lots.' he muttered absently, frowning lightly at the boy.

If the baby reacted to stimuli, then anything he did would set him off. But before anyone had gotten there, he had been able to handle him and up until Yashamaru had gotten there things had been fine. There had to be a way out of this.

Naruto would be safe for the time being. Now he just needed to figure out a way to get out of this with as much of his skin and organs attached as possible.

'I'm adding six spoons then.' was the answer from the kitchen. After the loud 'thwack' and some unrecognizable noise 'Five and a half.'

'Maki, can you go check on the Hokage's kid? Yes, the Hokage.' Could be heard when the spoon started clinking in the cup. 'He is little, blonde and looks like a Hokage except he is not Hokage. And it's a boy.'

Gaara listened to both of the noises, his ears twitching lightly once at the 'thwack' but he didn't look away. Instead, he had finally relaxed and stretched like a pancake against blonde, letting go of his shirt for a moment to catch it in the further reachable place. A bit of sand grain had gotten to his eye, but he didn't even blink. Minato immediately frowned, adjusting the baby in a more comfortable position and glaring toward the direction the redhead's voice came from.

'I'm a boy too, you know?'

Kazekage's face had only showed up in the door for a moment, covering the receiver of the spying communicator.

'You look like a grown up man to me.' he said and vanished from the sight 'Yes, he has blue eyes and is very loud. Can you stay with him for awhile? I will remember about it when promotions will come, yes…'

'Your coffee.' said Baki as he entered the room. The cup was plain white with the strange droplet of gold attached to one side of the brim. It looked just as weird as any art noveau 'Anything else? Meat? Soup? Dates? We have also ice, it the water had finally froze this month and…'

He made a step back as the little redhead suddenly reached out for the cup, almost spilling the contents all over itself.

'… and I can bring you some cacti jam to this ice.' He said as he stood there, indecisive whether lower the cup or not. Gaara finally decided for him as the sand had once again turned into a hand and started pulling the thing down.

Minato didn't quite wait for the Kazekage to disappear before rolling his eyes at the comment, not that the man seemed to notice, and then he had bigger things to worry about. Like the fact there were hands attempting to spill burning liquid atop a toddler, and that wouldn't have been nice even

if this particular toddler hadn't had a natural proclivity to express his discomfort in rather mortal ways.

'No, baby, _no_…' he snapped his fingers twice to try and gain the infant's attention, or at least divert it from the coffee. 'You know Baki-san, it's really nice of you to be so thoughtful, but there's no need to treat me as a guest. I just have bad karma.'

And as his sensei would have agreed with the Kazekage- curious fingers.

Gaara had immediately looked at the fingers, his attention snapping like a turn on/off button on the sound. Nobody dared to something like that around him, as his first reaction was to reach for new things, so it had startled him a bit, then made him curious. Leaving sand glued to the coffee in the midair, the little redhead rose his head and started observing the fingers like a magpie would look at the twinkling things.

'I _insist_.' said the man flatly as he simply let go of the cup, letting it hover around in the air. 'And you're not anyone, you're the handler of the second son. You surely are a guest.'

What he didn't add was the fact he was a long term guest. But there was no need for scaring the man yet. The other man immediately shook his head at the mere idea of it.

'A-ha ha… I have my hands full with one, if you want someone to handle 'the' second son, I assure you, you can do better.'

He paused to look down at the baby, noticed he was paying attention and smiled lightly, giving the small nose a light poke. Baki had only looked at him as if he had just said that he could handle levitating in the outer space just as good as any other average kangaroo and narrowed his eye lightly.

'I will bring dates then.' he muttered quietly and vanished back in the kitchen. To tell the truth, he felt like dancing on the ceiling or even higher – it was first time since moths he had actually seen a way out of this horrible job of keeping an eye on the hellish brat. And if the blonde was to be his ticket to freedom, then he was more than glad to push the responsibility on him.

Even if he had to share dates.

Gaara on the other hand didn't think that way. Actually, he didn't think even that much, his world now fulfilled with a whole new variety of feelings and actions he didn't have chance to see while laying in the dull, empty room in the sandy cradle. The things that warm yellow figure did to him were like if he had suddenly got knocked down by a rainbow – he didn't even know how to react to half of them. So, when, the big finger had touched his nose, he had looked at it to the point of getting cross-eyed, tense and giddy with what could all that bring. He felt his nose tingling pleasantly, and it was… nice.

He wondered…

Slowly rising one of the palms, the redhead caught the tip of the finger and pulled at it, not really having idea about what to do with this new toy. Without even looking at it anymore as he looked back to the strangely smelling cup in the midair, Gaara pulled at the finger and put the tip in his toothless mouth.

Minato smiled a little at that. Being careful, he felt for the baby's gums, not really feeling the tip of anything just yet. Which made the little redhead two unnaturally sharp canines luckier than Naruto. But he still needed those hands in case he had to do seals. Deciding to solve that issue before the Kazekage was back with what he hoped was a solution, he felt under his shirt for his necklace, pulling at the links lightly so they'd jingle and offering the longest one to the infant.

'Here, why don't you move forward about ten years worth of intervillage relations? Swap some spit with my son.'

If the silver cylinders were good enough to hold the limited attention span of one possessed baby, hopefully they would also work on this one.

Gaara's attention was immediately drew to the shining, jingling objects, something he had never seen in his life before. For sure light shone in his room and lit the walls, but it never made such jingly noises nor it had twinkled so passionately.

'Mwa…' he said, letting the finger out of his mouth (along with a trail of saliva still attached to it) and reached out for it, not intimidated what Minato said to him by the least. After all, It sounded all very friendly 'Daaa…'

The object was slippery and hard in the small fists as he caught it in the end. For a moment he looked at it, truly surprised by how it looked, then put it in his mouth. The taste and the shape were something completely new from squishy bodies. Reminded him of bones, but bones weren't that cold. With this thought, the baby had once again flattened against Minato's chest, thoughtfully sucking on the necklace. Cup of coffee steamed forgotten in the air.

Once freed Minato acted like the man he was and absently wiped his finger on the couch's edge, cleaning the drool off it and reaching up to give the baby a complementary pat in the back. Now if only he could keep himself entertained so he could just… reach… for the coffee…

And the sand had snapped at his fingers like an angry dog, actually forming the teeth that looked hard as razors. The cup had bubbled and sizzled, making Gaara look back at it again. The baby had blinked, then slowly rose one of the hands, making the cup land right on Minato's nose. Literally.

And since it had seemed to be a good position, he left it like that. The sand had immediately left the cup, making the fall of it more than predictable.

Minato wasn't sure if the sand really meant to bite him or if it just wanted to make a show out of what big teeth it had, but he didn't really care for finding out. He pulled his hand back as fast as he could, the baby squirmed on his arms, and then the burning thing was falling on top of them both.

He reacted by instinct, slapping the heated porcelain off his face with considerable more force than it provably warranted- The cup flew across the room trailing a brilliant arch of dark brown coffee before breaking against the wall. The large brown stain gleamed wetly on the wall for a moment, before the heated rock started absorbing the water in it, the patches of humidity slowly shrinking at a rate that made Minato feel vaguely sick.

'Sorry…' he called quietly, not really wanting either the Kazekage or his favorite lackey to come back and complain at him over what had happened, but feeling he needed to apologize all the same. 'I'll clean it.'

He looked down at the baby in his arm, shoulders falling lightly.

'When I can…'

Both men who had emerged from the kitchen looked at him with wide eyes. Then, without a word, Baki came to the crumbs and started cleaning them. Daichi had only frowned.

'You'd better worry about the kid now.' he said curtly and closed the connection on his communicator 'And your own safety.'

Daichi was out of words toward where it had all went. He looked at the clock and massaged his temples. He could as well make himself useful in such time and look over the new portion of scrolls containing plans of irrigation of the underground river that was discovered to flow twice a year for a few days. That included desalinating the particularly salty grounds and people had too many bad ideas of how to do it. He had to look over the projects again.

'I will be back later. Baki – cover for the missions of Namikaze Minato-san. I'm sure there's someone who is bored. And if there isn't, go there by yourself.' he muttered, pointing at the man. Baki nodded, still cleaning shattered porcelain.

'After I get out the stain, Kazekage-sama.' he muttered. Daichi nodded. Then he looked at Minato.

'And you…' he said, pointing his finger at him, but in his vocabulary there were not enough words to articulate what he wanted to say. So instead, he had waved them both off again.

'Just don't die.'

Gaara had once again formed the brief form of a hand waving the man off. This time Daichi looked back, hearing the sound, but when he looked at it, the sand didn't have any shape, changing in the milliseconds. Without a word, he emerged upstairs.

'I will take my leave then.' said Baki, patting the wall with sponge a few times, then simply scratching off the stain with a kunai. The hole could be covered with new sand when he would get back, still no harm done. And with that, he vanished, not even caring about paintings that still laid on the floor. Gaara looked after them all in silence, then he once again turned his eyes to Minato. His hands caught the necklace again and sloppily put back in his mouth. He liked the hardness of that shining thing.

'Awa.' he mumbled and yawned. When it was quiet, he felt sleepy.

The blonde stared after the pair in quiet disbelief, not really being able to give any sort of answer for several moment.

'…yeah. Okay!' he finally managed to spit out 'Don't- you know... help me or anything. It's not like if I could be horribly murdered while you are gone or anything!'

He heard, more than saw the baby yawning, and he probably would have found it irremediably adorable if it hadn't been for the fact he had been warned of what would happen should the baby be allowed some beauty sleep.

Irritated, he stood back up and decidedly marched to the windows, opening them. The otherworldly smell had thankfully dissipated, as such things tended to thankfully do in large spaces like this house obviously was, but he still wouldn't say no to some fresh air. Or baked air that at least didn't smell like rotten eggs.

Once satisfied, he marched back into the kitchen, looking around for the things that had been used to get him coffee so he could make himself some on his own. What a backstabbing traitor Baki had turned out to be. He knew perfectly well Minato was done for the day, usually finishing these stupid errand-boy duties much faster than others. This was supposed to be the last thing he did for the day. Meaning Baki was probably sitting in his office and drinking chamomile with a cacti and discussing poetry with a scarab or whatever people in the desert did in their free time, after stealing said free time from ex Leaf-nin.

'I don't suppose you'd be considerate enough to let go, would you?'

The baby had only looked at him, gurgling a bit in Gaara-ese as he had entered the kitchen. The place had always been entertaining for him as he had rarely had been there after he played with long pointy things – and he couldn't help but like the smells that lingered in the air. Especially now, one of them was strong enough to make him want to eat something.

'Baaa!' he squealed, trying to point out at something, but it could be anything. The sand had followed him, rolling on the floor like a lazy sea wave. 'Bubu!'

'Please, watch your step, please- oh, and now I'm done.' Could be heard in a hiss, as the wet rag hit the floor with an angry plop. Yashamaru looked at the sand that mingled with the milk pooling on the ground and held onto his sides 'I'm not touching this thing, so until you take the sand, have fun stepping over the glass, Mr. Soft-At-Heart.'

And with that Yashamaru got up and slammed the drawer open with a chakra string and getting a bait of dry meat from the refrigerator with a handful of others. A moment later the extremely sharp knife started flying in the man's hand, almost like if he wanted to actually kill the salver that lied under the meat, covering the worktop.

'It's all your fault!' he shouted suddenly, pointing the dirty knife at him, and then he sniffed and got back to cutting the meat again 'What do you want.'

Minato adjusted the baby in his hold again to try and stop his fussing and looking up and down at hysterical McPrettyFace as if it were some new and interesting alien form.

'Yes, because I'm sure you would have just handled over either of those other two kids you fuss over all the time to the first person who comes at you shrieking nonsense with a kunai in the hand.' he said , blowing up at his too-long-bangs to get them off his face. 'Maybe if you had screamed a little less and actually said something that did make sense like, 'hey, you know what? Touching that baby is not a good idea, he's possessed by a sand shark, you see', this wouldn't have happened.'

'Hey, you know what? This baby is top secret and you shouldn't have even wandered to his room, Hokage-guy or whoever you used to be in the past.' answered the blond, baring his fangs. The knife had suddenly flew on the other side of the room and bit through the wall like if it was made of butter. Gaara found it actually pretty entertaining as his eyes glued to the object for longer than five seconds, even if it was unmoving.

'And don't talk to me like that! I'm Kazekage-sama brother-in-law and I lived too long with that monster-' The baby looked back at him suddenly. Yashamaru's face looked at him and suddenly, it has changed into the sweetest, calmest features, like if he was taken from a fairy tale of 'Everyone's happy, eating candies and ride clouds'. '-yes, I'm talking about you, you little monster, you. Who is the little shit? Who had ripped the arm of Baki's nephew? You, you cute little dreadfulness! Here, have a piece of flesh.'

And with that he stroked Gaara's cheek, making the baby close one eye and look back at him with the same kind of awe that he looked at Minato. After giving the baby the very small piece of dry meat, the features of the blonde had changed with a snap to hostile and bitter man he was at the beginning. He didn't even try to end what he said or answer what was thrown at him, he just torn the knife out of the wall and got back to chopping meat again.

Minato stared at the man wordlessly for a moment, before taking the piece of meat away from the baby, leaving it next to the man at the counter and pointedly walking away.

He didn't care about Yashamaru throwing his position around so casually- actually, it was relieving at a certain level. Being the fourth Hokage had meant something to him once, and it had meant a lot. But now…

In the end he had sacrificed everything he held dear to be up to the village's protection. And yes, it had hurt, and yes, he would have given everything to be able to take it back, but he had done it. And even when he managed to defeat the monster, when he saved everyone's lives, when he stopped that nightmare at the highest price that could be asked of a man… They asked for more.

And he wasn't willing to give anything else up for it. He had promised.

What Yashamaru had done had shaken him up more than he let on, not because it had been too terribly violent, but because of what it was- because you didn't say those sort of things to a baby.

You didn't say those sort of things to any child, at any point, much less to someone that hadn't asked for the unfathomable burden of housing a monster inside their own flesh. Not to something that, had he chosen to remain in Konoha, could have been his son. Just the idea of it filled him with a quiet desperation that was even worse than the oppressing heat in his northern constitution.

'Don't listen to him.' he said once they were in another room, reaching own with one hand to brush the baby's cheek gently, voice low and quiet. He didn't care that the baby couldn't understand him yet. 'You are not like that.'

Brother-in-law, Yashamaru said. That would make him…

'It's not your fault.'

'It is his fault.'

The pair of black eyes glinted as they rose up, staring and piercing the pair through, back and forth. The photocopy of Daichi in thrice the size of the original sat on the same spot Minato did before actually going out of the room and played with some kind of ball jointed figure. He didn't seem to be very friendly.

'I don't know what he did but it's his fault! He destroryoys everything! Spoiler!' he said, shouting at the baby. 'Stupid Spoiler! You spoil everything!'

Gaara on the other hand didn't seem to be very inclined to be unhappy. If anything, he made unhappy noise as the meat was taken away from his hands – it wasn't because he liked to eat such things, not yet – but the sand did and now it couldn't, so he was at unease. He made another protesting sound, scrunching his face in rejecting mimic, looking back at the kitchen. But then Minato started talking to him nicely, and he liked the way this voice sounded also, not to say that he touched him on the places not many people did. And it was a few times today someone had touched him like that. He liked that. So when the finger had finally rose and he opened his eye, he waited for it to happen again. Instead, his brother shouted at them both again. He didn't really mind him. He liked his toys, but that big screaming figure didn't interest him.

Minato stared at the kid, feeling unease grow in the pit of his stomach- The kid couldn't be older than three, if even that much. He tried not to think what it would be like to be the older brother of an infant in command of carnivorous sand.

'He's just a baby.' he said quietly, trying not to sound defensive and failing. 'He doesn't know any better. He didn't ask for this.'

'I didn't ask for this too!' shouted the boy at him, actually pointing at Gaara with his wooden doll. 'I want father to play with me and he says no because Gaara cries! I want father to come look at my dolls and he says no because Gaara is sleepy! I don't like him! He is a Spoiler!'

And with that he actually ran close and showed the toy to Gaara, who didn't look moved much, though he kept on observing what was going on. However, when the toy had suddenly changed its face into something with teeth and big goggly eyes, he had jumped lightly in the hold, watching the doll. The sand had immediately got rid of it, tossing it at the wall and the boy didn't even try to retrieve it as he had ran away. After a moment of silence, the redhead's cry could be heard all around the house again.

Minato winced, the building headache seeming to concentrate at his temples and making him feel like his brain had been caught in a press that thought it would be funny to tighten inch by inch until something popped.

'Hush.' he said lightly, moving away from where the sand had dropped after disposing of the doll as he bounced the baby in an effort to calm him down. 'It was just a toy.'

What the little boy had done was stupid and dangerous, and yet Minato couldn't really blame him for the animosity or his reaction. It was a mess, all of it was.

And, knowing how normal babies took long to calm down, Gaara had once again stopped almost too fast to be a normal baby (well, what were the odds). At the calming words the green eyes snapped open and stared at the man, seeming to be more inclined at being curious than being scared, though not without hesitation; he still let out a small cry, but it was more like an echo than the actual sound.

The rocking was also something new. He didn't know what to think about it yet, so he just stared, wide-eyed at the strange, but very entertaining man that got a hold on him. Minato stopped, looking down at the boy and giving him a small, sad smile.

'Well.' he mused 'Aren't you a brave little man?'

If it had been Naruto, he'd have been at it at the very least five minutes. Even longer now that with his aching gums, very little was actually needed to set him off.

Gaara had only blinked, shying the uncried tears away in a couple of wet drops. Nothing stopped him from starring up, as the soft gentle voice sounded wonderful to him. Still, his stomach was feeling empty and now that he had already forgotten that he was scared, the emptiness rang through him with uneasiness.

So, slowly, he rose up a leg and started sucking on the toes. The fact they were covered in sandied socks didn't bother him at all.

'Ew.' the older man said, scrunching up his nose lightly and taking a hold of the foot, rubbing his thumb lightly on the sole in an effort to brush some sand away. Why did babies enjoy dirt so much? He was sure that if they had some sort of magical set of proteins pivotal to growing, some doctor would have told him already.

That made the baby jerk the foot out at the unknown sensation, both welcome and unwelcome. He didn't know how to react to it, beside hiding his foot away, so he had just squirmed, trying to actually roll to the side in Minato's hold. Still, during all that he just kept on starring at him, all his attention given to his face.

'What?' Minato smiled a little. 'You are ticklish?'

It was a bit creepy to have such a serious baby stare at him so attentively. He knew Naruto also blinked a lot less times that he himself did, but the doctor had told him that was normal in such small babies. But this baby blinked slow even compared with his own son.

Gaara didn't even try to respond, as he didn't really find the question that questionable. He had just stared for a moment longer and then, caught the bit of Minato's shirt and put it in his mouth without hesitation. It didn't taste like something he'd like to eat that much, but it wasn't that bad, given how wet it became after moment of sucking.

'Yes, this is a very stimulating conversation.' Minato's shoulders sagged, looking around for any sort of help and finding none. He didn't really like the prospect of going back to the kitchen, but he hadn't been in possession of a baby of his own all these months not to figure out that trying to chew on anything nearby meant he wanted something to eat. He just hoped Yashamaru was in a better mood, because he didn't feel like apologizing.

As it came out, at least he wasn't in worse mood. He had ended up chopping the meat and also the salad made from two kind of very dry looking and thick vegetables lied in the bowl, sprinkled with salt like with snow. The meat that seemed to be fried on the pan smelled of dead body and sea salt. The only more entertaining smell was the raw scent of flour and eggs being mixed into a big flat leaven, colored on the old brown with herbs that didn't hold any kind of tags on the bottles. The temperature in the room rose at least twice if not thrice, considering that everything was frying there, along with oven ready for baking and the sun helping from the outside through open windows. The milk was cleaned from the floor.

'What now.' he muttered, actually showing manly strength with kneading the dough. It seemed to be too dry to actually stay glued together, and yet, with quick moves it didn't fall apart. 'I'm busy.'

As soon as he went in, Minato felt his body trying to act like if he had entered a rotary door and get straight back the same way he had come in.

Heat. Concentrated inhuman heat, that's what the air in Suna was made from.

With the added temperature inside the kitchen, however, it reached degrees found only in torture sessions. Like most common houses in the village, Minato's small flat came with an outside oven, but even that was too much for him. To be truthful, since he had moved in here, he rarely felt hungry and hadn't really had much willpower or an actual reason to cook. There were thousands of street vendors only too happy to suffer in front of any additional heat source in his place.

'I don't mean to interrupt.' he said, trying to unglue his suddenly too dry tongue from his palate. It seemed like all the water lost there intended to go straight to his pores. 'But I think the baby's hungry.'

_Please give me something so I can run away_, he thought, but didn't say. That sounded vaguely rude.

'Too bad, we're out of milk.' said the other blonde not even looking back at the man as he still kneaded the dough. 'I will go to the shop to buy some when I'm done.'

And with what he was doing, it didn't seem he was going to be done sooner than at least in half an hour.

_Oh well, you tried_, Minato thought, looking down at the warm little body glued to his own.

'Allright. He can wait a little while, right?'

Yashamaru had finally looked back at him with his usual sweet smile upon his lips.

'Of course he can wait.' he said, and then just kept looking at him,smiling and kneading the dough, like if he was caught in a neverending loop in a movie.

Minato had actually been asking an honest question, as in 'if I make the baby wait he won't eat me, right' sort of inquiry. But if the man wanted him out of the kitchen, who was he to complain?

'Allright.' he repeated, nodding to himself and taking a step back. 'I'm going somewhere with a wall between me and direct line of all this murderous aura you are sporting.'

'I'm sorry for the inconvenience.' said the man simply, still looking at him a he had walked out of the kitchen. The baby at that time managed to let go of Minato's shirt and tried to eat his own hands, but in vain. Slowly, it began to frown, but not very much yet. The heat didn't seem to bother it at all.

_Yeah, and the main station is having problems outside its scope and thanks us for the patience._

He didn't know what the man was doing in the kitchen. He obviously belonged somewhere doing public relations and handling the masses or something like that. Which didn't give him a solution on what to do with the baby. Of course he could always go himself, but the baby wasn't allowed out, if his notion of 'top secret' wasn't irremediably flawed.

'Or I could make a clone.' he gave a look at the sand, which seemed to have stilled between him going to the kitchen for the second time and back. He could even send it make sure Naruto was all right. Carefully, he sat down, leaning back to make sure the baby wouldn't loose footing or something and carefully removed his hands to make the appropriate seals.

Gaara seemed to be interested in what Minato was doing, and even rose to pat at his hands in the weird position, but that was only brief sort of attention followed by a short gurgle of incomprehensible talk around the fist in the mouth.

'Yes, good baby.' the blonde cooed as sweetly as possible 'Don't destroy my clone when it appears and I'll get you something to eat, we agree? Remember shinobi don't go back on their word.'

He carefully removed the tiny, pale hands from his own and quickly executed the hand seals, a perfect copy of himself poofing to life next to them a mere moment later.

'Run for it.' The clone didn't need to be told twice.

The baby looked startled as the clone had shown up, but only for a moment. The sand on his skin had rustled a bit, lazily, falling off everywhere and stilling. That thing wasn't new to him - a lot of ninjas had made clones near his cradle as they usually were needed in numbers. He didn't expect it now, and the voice in his head made him feel vulnerable of such thing, but before he had chance to protest, the thing went away. Green eyes stared after it for a moment. Then, he took out the fist from his mouth and made a simple 'bye bye' gesture. A moment away, his adoration was all concentrated on Minato again.

'Oh, thank goodness.' He wrapped his arms around the baby again, giving him a light squeeze just from the relief of the clone having made it out in one piece. 'I can't believe that actually worked.'

It didn't take very long at all for the clone to return, even with him having steered it to get a glimpse of Naruto, and then the clone went to the kitchen to prepare a bottle for the baby. Goat's milk, obviously, so far he hadn't seen any cows in the desert, but he didn't really mind, he'd heard goat's milk it was easier on a child's stomach, and even Minato liked the spicy-ishness of it better anyway. There was also camel's milk, but he wasn't even going to get close there, there were such things as enough of the local flavor.

It seemed like if the clone was aware of the what would happen when he dispelled, because it left the bottle on the near-by table instead of handing it directly to the original. Minato was immediately rewarded with the stored information –

(_Had to pay myself for that milk)_

_(Money probably dispelled, should pass over and leave actual one when out of here)_

_(Naruto was fine- or at least didn't seem to be doing anything different than when I take care of him) _

- and then the concentrated feeling of the heat outside, running under the sun plus the concentrated stifling temperature of the kitchen, which was even worse because the oven was for some crazy reason open-

Minato actually had to grab onto the couch's edge to strand himself in place, otherwise he probably would swooned or something equally ridiculous. He had survived two wars only for climate to do him in. The irony of it.

'Hey…' he called softly once he managed to steer himself back into a straight position. Reaching for the bottle, he tested a bit on his palm- and felt absolutely nothing. Oh, yes, he was living on a living grill. There was no way his body would recognize changes of temperature.

He decided to wait a moment or two, then decided against it because waiting wasn't going to make anything go *colder* in this place. Instead, he felt around his pockets for a marker and drew something on the side of the bottle, automatically changing the contents' temperature to a few degrees colder.

Gaara had watched him playing with the bottle along with trying to fist the hand into his mouth once again, as he observed the milk going in and out of bottles to other bottles and he felt the smell-

His stomach gurgled uneasily. He felt hungry.

With a loud 'waah' he decided to reach for it even when the man wasn't done, and when it wasn't lowered, he demanded it (bubu) with the usual tone of voice and waited for other five seconds. He was milliseconds away from trying to snatch it the other way (precisely, with sand), when it was finally given to him, just a bit colder than usual, salty and sour milk. When the first droplets finally filled his mouth he let out a content sound (something between the quiet moan and loud gurgle) and just kept on drinking. On and on and on and on. Observing the man, the ceiling, the bottle itself.

It was a good dinner.

Minato smiled a bit at that, noting how like Naruto the baby sounded. He wondered if normal babies also made these cute little sighs and tiny noises when they ate. He had had an infant to look after for long enough that he knew how he was supposed to tilt the bottle, but still green enough he paid excessive attention to this, as if a moment of distraction might lead to him accidentally choking the little thing. Not to mention that in such heat, everything seemed to cost so much more effort than normal. Maybe that's why it took him so long to notice. He was almost half a bottle down when he realized what a good opportunity this would be.

Baby looked very quiet, very cuddly and very content. Carefully, he made a very slight attempt to pull him away from his body so he could put him down on the couch.

Gaara's a bit glazed gaze had immediately fixed on his face, and the muscles of the baby had tensed, but nothing else had happened.

Minato stopped as well, looking at the baby seriously. Sand didn't seem to have moved. Even more carefully than before, he tried again.

It was then when the dummy of the bottle had fell out of the baby's mouth, green eyes widening in realization. He was being pulled away. He didn't want to be pulled away, out away somewhere, where it wasn't warm, cuddly and comfortable. He squealed and flailed his hands, sloppily catching on the material of Minato's sleeves. At the same time, something had cracked above them, followed with a loud curse, that was too vulgar to be repeated. A moment later the very angry face of the Kazekage had looked out from the upstairs. He held on his eye like if it hurt him.

'What the hell are you doing?'

He had be so close, so very, very close. And then the bastard in reign had to startle him. Like most new parents Minato had a tendency to panic at the smallest noise of discomfort from a baby, so his nerves had been rattled enough at the little redhead's cry of alarm. All needed was the possible threat of angry Kazekage for him to go back to holding the baby to his chest. And then he realized what he had done and concentrated all his frustration on the appropriate party.

'Trying to get the baby off.' the younger man replied as if the answer should have been obvious, giving the other a glare that changed to mild confusion when he took notice of the way the other had a hand over part of his face. 'What happened to you?'

'The loose sand had suddenly jumped at me and gave me a friendly poke in the eye.' Daichi said, uncovering the face and showing the already expanding yellow bruise 'Don't take it off without assistance, I have to get other people out of here if you want to anger the brat.'

He looked down at him, then he looked back upstairs, like if something was calling him there, even if it couldn't be heard. Then without a word, he started descending the stairs. When he came down, he didn't even glance at the baby, who, plastered to Minato, and trembling, again and again threw glances at him, but still, kept on looking at the blonde with wide eyes. It was obviously still under the bad impression of trying to be put down. The Kazekage entered the kitchen.

'Where's the dinner?' could be heard, muffled by the door. Something had clunked and fell, making more noise, but it didn't sound broken.

'It's not ready yet, Daichi-sama.' was the answer 'What brings you here so early? Bread still has at least twenty minutes before getting baked.'

'I though it's dinnertime, since Gaara's fed.' was another sentence, and then, something had rattled and the sound of window could be heard '…when you're baking, close the windows. We don't need heat from the outside to add to the temperature.'

'Fresh air-'

'The air is still today.'

Silence, some more clinking, stepping over the floor.

'…but what are you saying, I haven't fed Gaara today.'

'He is fed.'

Silence. Then, the door had creaked open and the pink-tinted face of Yashamaru had looked out, surprised and interested. His eyes fell on the bottle that lied on the ground.

'What is this?'

Because milk didn't look milky enough to even be considered one.

Minato made a slight sound at the sight of the bruise, but couldn't help but feel a little tiny bit like if the man deserve that and worse, not that he was looking forward to see him getting all that karma owed him dished out.

He did wonder why the hell had the sand attacked him somewhere where the baby couldn't even know he would be at the time, especially since what was upsetting him was Minato and even in the case that the baby for some reason hadn't felt like wounding him, there was a much closer available victim in Yashamaru.

Unless the baby really liked Yashamaru. In which case it just lashed at the closest unlikable person (and given the terrified glances he threw at his father, he was willing to bet the man wasn't in the baby's top ten of favorite people). And even so it still wouldn't make sense.

On more important matters, he didn't like how the 'don't take it off without assistance' part of the speech sounded. Especially because it sort of implied that the Kazekage wasn't in any sort of special hurry to get his son off of him.

He ignored the rest of the conversation, given how it had shifted to domestic bliss concerning hot bread and hot food that made Minato vaguely ill just from thinking about it, and instead concentrated in again trying to shush the terrified baby, bouncing him lightly as he walked around the room hoping he would stop as fast as he had the other times.

He was in the middle of that when the green-eyed blonde came back, asking about what he had given the baby.

'Uh, milk.' he answered absently, stopping in his walking to give the man a slight frown. He had had his clone bring the milk, put what he wasn't going to use in the fridge and then generally mull around while the other man worked in the kitchen and Yashamaru hadn't been paying one single grain to attention to him. He could have been poisoning the baby!

Then again, he doubted the man would care.

'Baby was getting fussy, so I got some before something bad happened to me.'

'If something bad was happening to you, you should have said, then I'd go and buy it myself.' spoke the man, looking at him like if the Minato was lacking half of his brain, but the tone of his voice uttered nothing but politeness. He looked down at the floor again, then at the baby, who, being bounced and walked around managed to calm down quite quickly, but it didn't let go of his blouse now for a moment. Then, leaving the door of the kitchen open, he walked up to the bottle and opened it, sniffing it up. The Kazekage didn't seem to be interested in anything that was going on here, simply sitting at the table and chewing on some sort of a dry grass, looking somewhat similar to donkey or goat on the grassy field. He didn't seem to be ashamed by the fact someone saw him like that though.

Yashamaru had finally drowned his finger in the bottle and tasted the contents. Then he looked at the man with indifferent face.

'Boy, are you…' he said, and then he smiled. Then, like if nothing had happened, he corked to bottle close again and put it on the table, leaving the room. The door clicked shut.

'He gave him pure goat's milk.' could be heard from behind the wood, muffled again. Then, the very curious looking face of the redhead had emerged from the room, looking at the man with a frown. A moment later, looking long enough for his private matters, he had once again closed the door, accompanied with chair being moved.

'Why am I keeping that man here again?'

'Financial hole.' Something sizzled, probably being moved on the frying pan. Nothing followed the statement.

'You don't say? Like when I got into the kitchen and told you about this and you said that it could wait until you were done with the bread?' As a fellow blonde, Yashamaru could prove to be worthy opponent when it came to feigned denseness, but even so, Minato wasn't going to back down without a fight. 'That sort of saying, you mean?'

The following insult didn't really phase him one way or another, at least on the terms of what they were saying. On regards of the topic itself, he felt like spitting nails, preferably aiming them to his council. Because there was nothing to say about that, was it?

He was being kept. Just like a pet. Because that's what he was now, Suna's little pet.

Any day now his friends from Rock would come over to rattle the cage and feed him some peanuts. Hell, he wouldn't be surprised if the redhead charged them for the privilege.

'Oh, I'm so very sorry about that.' he said, laying thick on the sarcasm as he reached for the baby's neck and stroked lightly 'It's just about everyone around here gave me so much information about how to handle possessed toddler it just overwhelmed me, I can't possibly be expected to read all those many, many pages of reports and stats. I decided to try on my own.'

Gaara had only looked up at him, his eyes reading from his lips, moving with their movements. The tone of the man's voice was not very loving now and that wasn't very nice. The sand warningly slapped at the man's hands once they touched the redhead's neck. Gaara didn't react to that, like if he didn't care if such thing happened or not. But he held tightly still, frowning. He was at unease. With a slight frown, he hiccupped, the white substance flowing out of his mouth with a thin stream of droplets.

Nobody reacted in the kitchen to what was said. Only the moving of the plates showed that someone was still there, working. A moment later, the blond man had walked out of there, wiping his hands on the apron he was wearing. He completely ignored Minato and walked three step upstairs looking up.

'Temari-sama! Kankuro-sama! Dinner's earlier today, come down!'

And with that, he had only looked at the man, like if he was yet another piece of the furniture in the room. A moment later, the quick steps could be heard and a boy ran down the stairs. He had ran into the kitchen without even looking at Minato, but once he was in, he was immediately creeping out from behind the door. When Gaara looked at him, he immediately made a face, showing him his all teeth. A moment later it has changed into a tongue showing.

'Kankuro.'

'Coming.'

And the kid was in the kitchen again. Yashamaru looked up and finally let go of the apron.

'Temari-sama, dinner!'

'I'm not hungly!'

The man had propped himself on his sides, then looked back at the pair sitting in the room.

'Are you going to pat him in the back finally, or do you want him to throw up?'

_If I wanted him to, I'd be aiming him at you_ Minato thought, tempted to saying it out loud but not really feeling like going through the effort of it. Besides, the mental image of himself brandishing Gaara like some weapon and aiming streams of vomit exorcist style at his enemies was enough for him to break into a smile.

Ah, if only.

On the other hand, the man was good. He cleaned the dribble of milk with a finger that he vindictively wiped again on the couch, then walked to the bathroom where he had seen the set of baby things and rummaged through them until he found what he assumed to be the towel. Placing it on his shoulder, he got Gaara in the right position and gave him the standard pats in the back.

The redhead had hiccupped once again and burped, leaving another trail of milky saliva on his chin and the towel. It was not unpleasant, so it didn't really mind what's happened. Then he glanced at the door where shouting could be heard, along with doors being slammed open and shut. He didn't seem to be very shocked by it though.

Minato was surprised for the baby, but still waited another moment to make sure he was all right, before wiping his chin and carefully following outside, not really having an idea what sort of thing was going on. Judging by the volume of it, it could be either familiar dispute or enemy attack. Both were just about as probable.

But it wasn't enemy's ambush, neither it was even a family dispute. Well, maybe a one-sided discussion.

Daichi really didn't like when anybody – and he meant anybody – opposed him in the matters that didn't really need any sort of complications. Like, having a pet (not having it), washing his face (just scrubbing with sand) or eating a dinner (just digesting it, what's so hard about this?). That's why, when Temari opposed for the third time, he simply went upstairs and took her by the hand, forcing her to come down. He didn't even have to sweat over it, as the girl was too smart to try to lie down on the floor (he would drag her like that through the stairs anyway) but she made a ruckus worth at least a call from Shukaku. He didn't get what was so bad about eating a normal, everydayish, family-like dinner, but the girl tried to do her best to not have it. She wouldn't even have to eat anything, for god's sake!

'I don't wanna, I don't wanna, I don't wanna, I DOOON'T!' screamed the only female member of his family as he had simply forced her to go down the stairs and enter the kitchen, where the daughter of his simply burst into angry tears, as she didn't get what she wanted 'I'm not hungly, I'm not, I'm not gonna sit here!'

And when he put her down on the chair, she did sit there and just kept on protesting, like if he was beating her, or maybe holding her there or something. Yashamaru ignored it openly, along with Kankuro, just giving them their plates of food, all still hot, burning, and just as tasty as ever. He didn't even try to speak up. Such a nice day.

'Be quiet.' he said simply, and the girl had immediately shut down, even if she still had mixed feelings if not to oppose. One glance was enough to convince her it wasn't a good idea.

But the way she looked at him, made the food hard to swallow.

'Go give that to Hokage-sama.' he muttered, looking at her plate, as she stubbornly refused to touch the food. 'Be nice.'

She didn't look at him even once as she took the plate and walked out of the kitchen.

Minato had been sitting again in the couch, minding his own business (which right now amounted to removing a very strange and lethal baby off his person) when a pretty little girl came out of the kitchen. Looked like one of the two kids always around Yashamaru: also looked like the one who had thrown the rock.

'Hello.'

'Your food.' said the pretty little girl, and then simply threw it at him, without even a moment of hesitance. The only moment of thinking that was made, was over the plate, but after a second she threw it too. Sand rose up and caught the plate before it landed on Gaara. It didn't, however, protect him from bread and salad. The baby looked at the food, startled by what's was happening. In a moment of pensive thinking, he took the still greasy piece of goat's meat and threw it on the ground, very likely treating it as something that could be thrown. As it didn't fly far, he didn't seem convinced by the fact it was a good object to do play with. Quietly, he took a piece of bread and put it into his mouth, wetting it more than actually tasting. He looked indifferent to the fact he held something different and edible in his mouth than milk.

'Did you give Minato-san his food?'

'I did.' said the girl. As the door were closed, nobody really noticed how the 'giving' looked like in the end.

Minato was left covered in pretty much the same amount of contents that the baby was, which wasn't really much. Apparently salad wasn't salad as much as 'grass thingies with as little dressing as it can be afforded'. In fact, the meat was greasier than the salad. Even so, he was horribly close to tears for a moment.

Not because he was now dirty and he would have to wash his shirt and he had no idea how he was going to get his hair cleaned without wasting the minimal amount of water one was required by law to limit yourself to per person. That wasn't it, he had been covered by far worse (adventures in the forest of death with his teammates and later his own group of genins had proven to be most explicit about how much a human psyche endure without cracking at the mere thought of what you were covered in). No, it was the fact he was here at all, the fact all of this was happening.

He felt horrible for thinking this, but if he had know this is what would have happened, he would never have let his motor-mouth of a lover convince him that Naruto needed at least one living parent.

'Know what baby?' he muttered softly , gently reaching for the bread and pulling him away. No teeth equaled no solids, it was simple as that. 'If you kill me before anyone comes back, I promise I won't tell on you.'

Gaara didn't really fight over the piece of bread, but the tone of voice caught his attention. He looked up with big green eyes, watching the man in silence, all the moving hands and legs (so important in child's life for reason no adult would understand) had stopped, as it had just looked at him, quiet and calm.

'What? No?' he asked just as quietly, looking right back at the serious mint gaze 'You sure? Because-' his voice caught, throat working uselessly for a moment and eyes itchy like only this horrible climate could make them. 'I could put a nice word on you for the Death God. Real nice guy, the big man. Gives hell of deals.'

And he laughed a little, sniffed, and then stopped altogether like he was, slumping in the couch and concentrating on prying little bits of green from the baby's hair as an excuse not to think of anything for a while.

The redhead had kept on looking at the blonde, his eyes only moving a bit with every pick, following the green things that were in his hair for no reason. And then, like is something had clicked, he let out a distressed noise and rolled to the side, almost rolling off the Minato's knees. The sand jumped up from the floor, but it had immediately fell down as Gaara stopped and rolled back into previous place. He looked up at Minato and moved his legs, like if he was trying to kick something off, but he wasn't really doing anything to the air. The tense grimace indicated that he felt uneasy enough to cry, but not yet.

That was enough to shake Minato out of his self imposed inner 'lost signal' mental message, quickly moving to catch the little redhead, getting back up and adjusting him on his hold.

'What? What happened?'

The redhead let out another distressed noise and once again tried to kick the air, but this time with less effort. Then he had stilled and looked up at Minato, his features slowly getting back to normal. He seemed to be just as questioning as the man with his gaze.

The blonde stared back, looking at the baby quizzically and waiting for any sort of reaction.

'What was that about?'

Gaara seemed to be just as lost in the situation as was he.

However, when the door from the kitchen opened, the questioning gaze that the older redhead gave to the man was much more readable.

'Just… what?' he asked, then looked at the toddler '…what's happened?'

Minato turned to look at him, feeling very much like the last sane man in a loonhouse.

'I don't know. I was trying to clean him, and then he got fussy, but then he got over it-'

The man looked at him like if he had just lost the last bits of the said sanity.

'Not Gaara.' He muttered, then pointed at the piece of bread in the blonde's hair 'This.'

Minato stared at the man blankly, and only after what surely was at least three seconds too long, reached up to brush the piece of bread off.

'Oh.' he muttered absently, brushing his fingers together. 'Like. Life happened to me. I think it's trying to divorce me or something.'

'By decorating you with food?' he said, and caught the Temari by the brim of her dress, stopping her from ascending the stairs. He frowned at the man, but his gaze still held confusion.

'I'm grateful you're trying to be nice and all, but this is not a palace and my kids are not the princes in the golden cage. They need to have manners and behavior of any other well taught Sunanin.'

The girl looked up at him, slightly confused, slightly angry, then at the pair on the couch. The recognition fell on her gaze and she paled.

'Must be some sort of new age therapy.' Minato replied, not really caring about weather what he was saying was even in the right context or not: He was more interested on figuring out why did the little redhead behaved that way. He gave a distracted look at the little girl and immediately winced- she reminded him of Kushina. Everything reminded him of Kushina.

'It doesn't really matter.' he almost added that she kind of also owned him by extension of being the daughter of the tyrant of rule, but just thinking about it made him tired (and hot) so he went right back to slumping on the couch. God, he wanted a nap. And alcohol. Lots and lots of alcohol.

'No, it does matter. A lot.' said the man, pressuring at the sentence. Behind him, Kankuro simply skipped the steps, ignoring the whole situation. Yashamaru kept on making noise in the kitchen. The girl looked both scared and determined to not get back down. The man looked at her.

'She tends on throwing things at people who take care of Gaara. A whole lot.' he muttered then pushed her forward. The girl didn't look happy she had to come closer at all 'It's all about some biological barrier-'

'Disease!' piped up the smaller blonde, trying to take a step back, but the redhead had only held her in place 'Father!'

'People don't get sick because they take care of Gaara.' said the man, then looked down at her with tired gaze. He didn't really want to put up with the moods of a four years old now. '…and to prove that, you will assist Namikaze Minato-san until he goes to bed. Don't-'

'But father!...'

'…do NOT disappoint me.' he repeated, then looked up. The light snicker that could be heard for a moment, immediately vanished, along with the brown tuft of hair available on the upstairs. 'Ask her if you need anything. Now excuse me.'

And with that, he went away. The cutlery still clunked in the kitchen and the boy upstairs once again snickered, at least until the Kazekage reached his spot and simply dragged him with himself, and the girl still stood in her place like glued to the floor. She seemed to be obviously scared of trying to do anything – whether it was coming closer or walking away.

Minato watched the interaction, waiting until the man was gone before speaking.

'Sorry.' he said, as if that the girl throwing food at him and getting punished for it was somehow his fault. Maybe it wasn't, but he defiantly felt sorry. For the whole situation. Mainly the parts that involved him.

'…You can leave when he goes away or something.' he made a vague gesture after the path the girl's father had just used 'I won't tell.'

The girl looked at him, then looked upstairs. After a moment of slight hesitation, she had simply ran out of the room and vanished outside. If she could go, she wouldn't stay. Simple. Minato sighed.

'Well, it's just you and me again, little red.' he said, brushing one last missing strand of green from his hair. 'I don't suppose you would know anything I don't about seals?'

The baby had only sneezed in response. Apparently, it was all it could add to the so interesting topic that seals was in his life.

'No? Well… It was worth a try.'


	3. No 3

For someone that had what could more or less be accurately described as a ticking bomb strapped to his chest, the Leafnin seemed to be taking things in a stride. It was definitely nighttime now, and even if he dearly wished he could be at home with his own bundle of joy, Minato looked considerably better now that the temperature had cooled down. In fact, the blonde probably should have been wearing a blanket at the low temperature, but he seemed content to be soaking up the slight chill like an old cat soaks up radiator warmth.

'How old is he?'

The baby looked to be a bit bigger than Naruto, but not by much. Which was odd, because as far as he remembered, Suna's disaster had happened around the time Kushina had found out she was pregnant.

The redhead looked up at him from the chessboard, contemplating the way pieces stood on the table. He had finally decided to leave the work to be done some other time and went down to look at the situation. It hadn't changed a bit, Gaara didn't seem to get tired of the man or show any signs of annoyance by the fact he was being held by the same man on and on and on and on and on. Which wasn't reassuring by the least, but given how calm the baby was, he was trying to look at it from the bright side. At least he had a person who wouldn't say no to his chess game, being afraid of too many political connections it held. Given in what passive work was the blonde doing, he could accompany him a bit.

'He should be celebrating his first birthday soon.' he muttered from behind his hand, which he used to cover his mouth with. No particular reason, just the pose. He moved the rook to the side, lurking for the bishop hidden between pawns. As he watched the baby, Gaara seemed to be content so far. Which was relieving. 'He was born in January.'

'January?' he adjusted the baby and moved a pawn two steps forward 'He looks smaller.'

He didn't really care for chess, only knew the basic rules for it. Personally, he preferred puzzles and other skill games, but it was something he had learned to play because it was the polite thing to do, and so here he was, applying the politeness. In his arms, the baby was warm, small and light as a feather, once more having regained fascination on his necklace and biting with his gums on the cylinders.

A question lurked in the back of his mind, and he really didn't want to ask. If he asked and had it confirmed he would either be horrified now, or be horrified now and build up horrifyiance for another couple weeks.

'January, so… is that, uh… hotter or colder than now on this side of the crematorium?'

Daichi looked up from the chessboard with a surprise.

'Excuse me?'

'The month.' the blonde clarified, a little more stressed than before 'January? Is it hotter than right now?'

'It's just as hot as December.' Daichi said, still frowning over the choice of the words. 'Crematorium' he said. As much as he could agree that's an oven right here, he didn't like the words that people usually added – like 'graveyard', 'deathbed', 'beach without sea' and the other similar ones. It was just a desert, nothing more and nothing less. He, however, liked poking the Mizukage about his ice areas just for the hell of it.

'It's a humid month, everything gets ready for spring.' he muttered and moved one of his pawns forward 'We get snow.'

Minato had gone back to staring at the chessboard, his eyes going half heartedly around the board, then quickly used a tower to get a bishop, leaving it defenseless against a simple pawn, but after looking at the piece around, he nodded in satisfaction.

'Sorry.' he said with a smile, reaching down to gently untangled the necklace from the baby's hand, giving him the taken piece instead. It was big and smooth enough the baby should be able to munch on it safely. 'My mind wondered away, what did you say after December?'

The redhead lightly cocked his head to the side and reached out to take the piece from the baby. Gaara didn't protest, only to get unhappy when he couldn't get back the necklace.

'I said' he muttered as he cleaned the bishop. Those pieces were as old as Sunagakure itself and were too valuable and dirty for a toddler to munch upon them. Especially a baby who could grow sharp teeth in any given moment. 'That January is a humid month. Since spring starts in February, everything gets ready for the rains and brief mercy from the sun above. Thus, snow falls at night.'

He looked at the rook and then took it, also clearing it with the brim of his shirt. While he was at it, he could also do it with other pieces.

Minato gave the redhead a dirty look as he took the piece away. The baby's tugs to reach the necklace were starting to give him a kink on his neck. He held him up a little higher in his chest even though his arms were starting to feel a bit strained. Not that the little redhead weighted much, but it had been almost six hours since he'd plastered himself to his chest. He stopped in the middle of it to stare at the redhead with an unreadable expression, blonde brows furrowing very slightly as he gave the redhead a distrusting look. Was he making fun of him?

'…you don't get snow in the desert.'

Gaara, was obviously thankful for the lift as he reached for the necklace and started gnawing on it with pink gums. The other redhead slowly left the piece on the table.

'You do get low temperatures at night.' he muttered, looking at the man with 'you must be joking' stare. Obviously, Minato had to know that the weather on the desert changed and did the proper research before he got to live here, right? He couldn't be such a closed person, not for the sake of profession he did. 'And since it's humid, you also get dew. In the low temperature It changes into thin coat of snow. Only because it's only sand underneath, it absorbs everything instantly in the morning.'

He turned to look at the baby again, observing how it toyed with the jewelry. Green eyes looked back at him for a brief second, but slid away as he didn't pose as anything interesting.

'Don't compare it with actual snowstorms you have known till now.'

Maybe for a Sunanin it got cold at night. Maybe for rock ninja it might get even chilly, but for Minato, who had been born in the area closest to the mountains and was used to colder temperatures, the chill of the desert night was nothing if only a respite from an uninterrupted string of hellish temperature.

'I happen to like the snowstorms I've met until now.' he replied sulkily, frowning at the board as if it had offended him instead of the redhead and lightly leaning his cheek on top of the baby's head. He was so incredibly tired. And the now breathable temperature plus the baby's quietness plus the lack of activity made him want more than ever to take the chance and take a well deserved nap. One that lasted more than the ten minutes Naruto felt his father was entitled to due good behavior. '…I really can't imagine snow in the desert.'

Daichi had almost jumped out of his skin at the view. The man had simply laid his head on top of the baby, like if it was any ordinary baby, not an atomic bomb that could explode at the slightest poke. He had only let go of his breath when the confused Gaara rose his head to look at the cheek that landed on him, his expression more than baffled. Nobody dared to get their head close to the baby in the past, at least no more times than a few – it could cause a loss of any things that were attached to the skull (including hair and chin), ripping eyes out, crushing of the head – and his least favourite – the brain full of sand. He happened to be nearby when a very not careful woman he hired decided to look too closely at the baby to coo at him, and touched the wrong nerve at the wrong moment. As much as he tried and as much as three ANBU that showed up immediately tried to do something – anything, including sidetracking Gaara's attention and even trying to block the sand somehow – there was no stopping or getting the sand out that got through the nose and ears to the head. And if ears hadn't got air connection with brain? No problem.

It was horrible to look as a not very smart, but definitely not stupid young woman only at the beginning of her career got from normal to completely insane through many variations of ticks and signs of brain tumor until she finally dropped dead. It lasted longer than eight minutes – the time that was inhuman, even for torturing someone's most delicate parts before completely cutting it off or burning it. He slowly wiped off his forehead, not even trying to be discreet.

'It's a very artistic view.' he said, as he looked at Gaara. The baby mumbled something, trying to pat at the man's face. Then he got up, the chess board forgotten. 'Show him to me.'

Minato smiled at the gentle swat and caught the baby's hand with the tips of his fingers- it was tiny, barely big enough to wrap around his thumb, the tips of his fingers grazing the soft skin gently. It wouldn't take any effort at all to bend them out of place. Much less than a stick the same width of them. Again, he was terrified by infant's shatterability and wondered how so many reached adulthood when they were so utterly frail.

At the request he blinked tiredly at the man, sighing and forcing himself back into a more 'no, really, I am awake' position and sighing lightly. He looked down at the baby.

'Baby, I'm going to turn you around now. Please cooperate with the maneuvers, okay?' carefully, he tried to shift the baby around, trying to make as obvious as possible he was just changing posture, but not really very convinced the little redhead would be agreeable.

Gaara, surprisingly, didn't protest, as he was not being torn away from the warm chest. The green eyes leapt to the necklace when it slipped through his hands at the turn, but before it could protest, his view changed and he stood face to face with his own father.

That was not the best outcome he could have wished for.

But then, not the worst. The man was epitome of salvation at the worst possible moments – when his bum started to hurt too much from his diaper not being changed for ages, when he couldn't calm down, when there was something that couldn't be done by anyone else. But then, if he showed up, it usually meant the air smelled like enemy and that he wouldn't get peace anytime soon. Gaara squealed, furrowing his nonexistent eyebrows.

Daichi's lips thinned into a very small line. It was obvious the kid was confused. He was an unwanted interruption and what was this saying about him? Nothing good for sure. But then, he really couldn't ignore it any longer.

He let the kid catch one of his hand with both of his hands in opposing gesture and reached out with the other to unzip the light pajamas. The skin underneath it showed two tiny nipples and a navel, both triangling on a deathly pale piece of skin.

Minato was pleasantly surprised by the baby's sudden docility- not that he was especially fussy, at least not unless he tried to remove him. When the older man reached for the baby he automatically removed his arms from around the little redhead's middle, keeping him upright by the arms instead.

'What is it?'

He was looking for a seal? But he had brushed the baby's stomach several times and he hadn't felt anything. And even if Gaara did have restrain seals, they had to be broken- if they had been right, the sand wouldn't act on his own.

'I need to check on something. Please, don't move.'

'Uwuuu!'

The nonexistant eyebrows furrowed even more and the sand started forming in front of his face, simply becoming a block that started to push his face away. Trying to ignore the fact it was blocking half of his view, Daichi reached out for the chest and started pressing at the little body. At the fourth time the redhead suddenly let out a pained cry and the sand hit him in the face (which time today again?), making him land with his back on the chess board. He dodged the second shot and sighed, not moving for a moment. The sand slowly calmed down as he was away.

'You can zip him up now.'

'Are you all right?'

Minato had grown increasingly uncomfortable by the older man just poking away at his child like if he were testing maybe if the bread's dough had risen enough or not, especially when the baby became stressed enough to retaliate. When the man got knocked out, he jumped away, again holding the baby back to his chest in a protective manner.

'What was that for?'

The other man had massaged his chin for a moment, then got up.

'I was just checking if we will get a peaceful night. Or, as you seem to be sleepy – if you will get a chance to sleep.' He looked at the mess made from chess pieces, then ignored all of them as he skimmed through the figures and left the room.

'Just to confirm – no, you won't be sleeping tonight.' could be heard from the other room, slightly muffled by distance. Then he was back, holding an egg-shaped box and holding it out to him 'Since he can already feel pain through his skin, there's not much time left before it spreads. You can use this to relieve it. I'm going to get a nap before the whole circus starts.'

The younger man slumped a bit, but after a moment or two just shrugged.

'It's not like if I was expecting to.' He looked down at Gaara, running a hand over his back in a shushing gesture 'If I went home I wouldn't be sleeping either, it's just the baby is so quiet.'

Well, when the man wasn't poking at him, at least. He found it very strange, because even when he wasn't in a wailing fit, Naruto was prone to making all sorts of baby noises. But that probably came right out of his amour, who was prone to talk even in her sleep. In a way, it was nice, this feeling of not being left completely alone. In another- he wasn't getting much sleep. At all.

'What is this anyway?'

The older redhead didn't seem to be very moved by what he said. Because, actually, the words 'cute baby' stopped having any meaning to him some time ago. Sounded like oxymoron. Or maybe even a psychotic denial.

'Balm for internal pains.' he muttered as he clicked something and the egg fell onto two halves, showing very hard, steaming insides. With such image, it had to be freezing cold 'Not that it will help you much here, but when you don't know what to do it satisfies you just right.'

He closed the halves, the steaming immediately stopping. It seemed that the ointment either was kept well in closed spaces or that the box held the temperature intact. Mostly the latter.

'Because you gave him goat's milk which he doesn't drink, he is going to remind you of his cursed existence for a very long time. If he feels my fingers just on the light pressure, it won't be long before he starts screaming his lungs out.' He looked down at the baby that so far, seemed to be much more interested in catching Minato's pendant than being loud. He frowned. 'I'm going to clean the chess and will take a nap. If he gets hostile, call me or my ANBUs. I'll be in the nearby room.'

'Wait, goat's milk is bad for babies? I thought it was supposed to be the other way around?'

That's what Hokage-sama had told him at least, and he had two perfectly fine kids. And Naruto liked his just fine and hadn't had any sort of problems so far?

'I spent maybe ten minutes in the kitchen and Yashamaru didn't tell me anything about it being bad for the baby!'

He wasn't really trying to be accusing, he honestly felt awful. So that cry the baby emitted was because of the milk, not the poking itself? And there was more to come?

'This is Suna, isn't this an apothecaries wet dream or something?' he asked following after the man. 'Can't you just give him a- something to purge him or something? And how do I even give him that frozen thing? Do I warm it up and give it to him?'

'Goat's milk is good for babies, it's nutritious. But Gaara doesn't tolerate it and gods if I know why.' Answered the Kazekage, not even stopping with his march until he had reached the sofa in another room. Only then he had glanced at the blonde, but briefly, through his shoulder. 'If I had to speculate, it's because as a monster it just likes iron, so it would gladly drink blood instead of milk. Of course, we can't have that.'

The hands of the leader quickly got out the sheets hidden from under the piece of furniture and unfolded the pearly white covered in the most fragile and yet the most uninteresting pattern around the corners. Crosses.

'That's why he drinks donkey's milk. A luxurious baby with luxurious needs, hah.' He snickered at that, but it was a bitter laugh. Seriously, so far everything Gaara had done cost him more than two of his other kids, his wife and her brother together and they were still counting. 'Cause it has iron. But then, I don't get why it has to be watered down so much. Don't ask me for logic here, it's a demon.'

Then, when the cushion was finally done, the man had turned around to look at the both personas.

He didn't know why Yashamaru hadn't warned him, neither he could understand why Minato decided to feed Gaara when it was strictly his in-law's job. There had to be some misunderstanding here, but whatever it was, he was not going to dwell on this. Yashamaru held him under his own shoe, no matter if he liked it or not, and any troubles would get into a hissy fit. Not like if he couldn't just banish him from village or kill – this was easy as pie – but the man was not afraid of him as he knew his own value.

Besides, it was possible he was not exactly sane. Nobody in his right mind would like to tend a monstrosity.

'The ointment is kept like that for a reason. Cold things give the relief, they numb things. Just massage it onto his belly, that's all.' He muttered as he sat down 'And I swear… we have many things that could ease pains, but there are two things – Gaara won't eat it, he won't allow it being given to him by his anus and all things that break skin are out of question. Besides, this would only put him at ease, but wouldn't eliminate the source. I assume you have never lived through baby colic.'

Minato almost laughed out loud. Of course cold things gave out relief. In the past few weeks. That's why the man piling sheets over the couch as if to hide from the lovely, blissful night chill was something out of this world to him: The again, he was the only one who seemed content with his sleeveless shirt, even the baby was snuggled in blankets.

Before leaving Konoha, he had been given a rush of baby advise given to him, like how to administer medicine to babies, which mostly consisted in stocking it in a needle-lees syringe and push content down baby's throat and hope he was unable to spit it back up. Which explained why that was a bad idea with this particular baby. It seemed he was on his own on this.

With a sigh, he went back to the living room, looking at the brightly illuminated space and trying to think of some crazy battle plan or anything that would help him in the following situation and only coming around with the fact he was thirsty again and really wanted some mint tea. Stupid Sunanin and their ridiculously addictive blends.

Walking into the kitchen, he measured enough water for one and put it in the fire, starting to walk around with the baby still in his arms. He didn't think it would do much of a difference, but usually Naruto liked it better if he was in constant movement.

And when the storm came?

He'd deal with it then. That's how Konohanin had more or less survived the past four generations.

Gaara didn't seem to be having any problems so far. His eyes were still following the man and his doing's with admiration and naïve curiosity. When the fire was started and the strong smell of mint started spreading through the air, the green eyes widened, even showing very blank pupils as he started searching for the source. It seemed to be the one of things he had liked – and it was, for sure. The mint tea was not uncommon anywhere – it was cheap and everyone drank it, so it meant presence. And presence of other people could be everything – food source, a play, even something akin to care – but overall – attention. Ninjas that usually hurt him smelled of fear and sweat, but the ones that were never expecting anything and just were relaxed, smelled of mint tea. Gaara liked it. That was for sure.

'Eee!' he squealed as the cup was being filled with water and he flailed his hands toward it, wanting to grab it. The sand surely helped, but once the cup moved, the water accidentally splashed on it and it quickly moved away. That didn't seem to affect Gaara in any way.

'Careful, baby.' Minato muttered, quickly serving himself the cup and pulling away from it so as to prevent temptation. 'I messed up with you enough for one night, I don't want you getting hurt again.'

It was an odd reaction, though. Naruto also seemed to spend an awful lot of time sniffing him and rubbing against him after he had mint tea.

Jinchuuriki catnip?

Just out of curiosity, he wet two fingers on the hot liquid, blowing on them quickly to keep himself from getting burnt, before offering them to Gaara.

'Want some?'

The redhead immediately grabbed on his fingers and just held on them for six long seconds, his nostrils working – not very visibly though. Then, after the starring at the wet fingers he simply put them in his mouth and started gnawing at them, salivating them eagerly. The taste didn't seem to be inclining though, he moved away, still holding on the fingers, then looked up at the man, a bit confused. Something was out of the picture here.

'Ew.' The blonde wrinkled his nose even as he smiled through it. Really, one would think ninja kids to know better than to take anything into their mouths. He wiped at his fingers on a nearby rag, then dipped them again, repeating the process.

'You want more?'

The redhead once again grabbed at the fingers and started sucking on them, but this time it was a much shorter picture. He took them out of his mouth and stared at them then at him, like if he was trying to mess up with him. He tried sucking on them again, but they didn't seem to taste good to his likes.

'No?' Minato laughed lightly, leaning to press his head against the baby's for a moment. 'More for me then. Sorry about that.'

Gaara had only closed his eyes in response and opened them as soon as the man was away. The strange touch on his forehead was a different but nice feeling.

But when Minato started drinking on his tea he had once again reached for the cup, as the strongest source of the smell in the room, trying to grab the slick surface with fingers. It was a very intriguing thing and having a short memory was not helping here.

'Nooo, baby…' It took some tongue burning, but Minato managed to drink his tea fast enough to both burn his tongue and manage *not* to burn the baby in his arms, after which he offered him the cup to inspect, careful to keep it in his hand just in case he felt like throwing it away.

'There, happy?'

The redhead indeed was happy with the response, as he quickly turned the cup upside down and started inspecting the insides. His joy was short-lived though. After trying to gnaw at the brim of the cup he simply shook it, and then, let go of it. It smelled nice, but that was it for his inspection. His attention was once again back at the blonde man. Noticing the green eyes back on him, Minato gave the baby a tired smile.

'Hi.'

He wondered what Naruto was doing. Was the woman with him doing a decent job out of filling his baby needs. They mostly consisted to hearing him screech these days, but there were other things. Would she know that he only liked to be tucked with the light orange blanket at the bottom and the strong orange one on top and not the other way around? Would she warm up his bottle the right way, because Naruto liked his things a little hotter than the norm - maybe he should have warned her beforehand about it? There was no way she would know the song Kushina had sang to him, how was Naruto going to be able to get into his four-minutes-and-a-half nap without it?

Sometimes Minato wondered if parenthood had brought some deeply hidden obsessive-compulsive vein in him. Nonetheless, it did make him uneasy, to the point any distraction was welcome. For a moment he looked around for any sort of inspiration. Then he saw the sand, and that seemed like a good enough excuse as he might find. Walking back to the living room, he looked around for the paper seal the Kazekage had used.

He hadn't looked at it before, and the sand had made a mess on the floor after the seal started wearing off. Currently there was only the vaguest of hills to suggest there had ever been a sand formation on the spot he had been glued to, but some careful poking around the now loose sand finally showed about the paper symbol, all burnt out after use.

It was blackened and almost unreadable, but still, some green lines stood out at the ends. The loose sand quickly moved away from it as soon as the paper was pushed away from it. Gaara watched it from distance, not showing anything beside the mild interest.

Minato examined it critically. This wasn't the refined fūinjutsu from Uzushiogakure, but something that looked more arcane. Most of the composites of the seal also seemed to be written in old Sunian, and given how he didn't know anything about it, he could barely recognize what those did by similarities they shared with the ones His sensei had taught him.

The centric seal was perfectly understandable, and he wasn't surprised the Kazekage had found it draining. It was, simple as it could be, a seal to stop dead in the tracks. Most fūinjutsu were created specifically to accomplish certain functions, that's why they were built with a simple order. And the problem with this one was the lack of specification. It was an open order. 'Stop'.

Not 'stop the sand' or 'stop the rocky parts of the sand', it was _stop_. Which meant that the seal would do just that - stop whatever it came into contact with. And given how sand was hardly a solid object, it first needed to be solidified. And that's where the chakra went- and the more sand the more chakra, and so on.

He could see why trying to stop the sand would be a difficult order to perform- there was only a million things sand was composed of. Rock and salt and oxide, myriad minerals and elements and bloodthirsty bijuu. A specific seal would roughly have to be the size of the couch if he wrote it with his really tiny lettering.

Which didn't really change the fact it was ineffective.

He almost started to think what his sensei would think about such an ofuda, but quickly forced himself to shift focus to something else. The last thing he needed was to think about his teacher after what he had done to him. Still looking at the paper, he sat down in the couch, eyes following the lines. The one in the corner probably served as some sort of suppressor, but for some reason it felt incomplete…

He was not given much time to think about it, though. The baby, who had been doing just fine with starring at him and everything he was doing, at some point completely lost interest with the piece of paper, not trying to even grab it. It just kind of lied there, starring with glassy eyes at the ceiling. Something wasn't right. He felt the pressure from within but couldn't even name it or tell what was it supposed to be – was it hunger? He didn't feel particularly hungry. Was it time of releasing his insides? It wasn't that either. And the pressure just kept growing. The redhead stilled.

And after a long disturbing moment, the pressure started being uncomfortable. The green eyes shifted at the blonde man, trying to search for something at his face, then at the ceiling, his face losing color. He moved his arms for a moment, and then tried kicking at Minato's arm. That one was a mistake, because once he moved, the pressure outgrew and painfully burst in his insides. Gaara shouted, making the sand everywhere explode in different directions, like if it was mined with explosive tags, and then just burst into accusatory sobbing. Something was hurting him and he didn't deserve it. The sand agreed on that, making rivers upon the floor and running back and forth, searching for the enemy. In vain.

Minato startled at the kick, which was very good news, given how the sand suddenly decided to mow down anything at ground level. Quickly pulling away from the floor, he jumped at the much safer perch of the wall, cradling the baby close. When the sand didn't immediately attack him, he risked a look.

'Little red?' he tried, wondering if the baby could even hear him over the furious squalling 'Oh, baby, I'm so sorry.' At the lack of anything better to do, he pulled the baby so he was lying to his chest, thinking that if anything else, the close contact might soothe him a bit. But it didn't sooth him even in one bit. If anything, only the sound of crying had changed as Gaara had changed position, but he continued on wailing with the same effort as before. It wasn't soon before the Kazekage entered the room, walking on the wall.

'Are you okay there?' he asked, pointing a kunai at both of them 'If yes, I will get the kids out.'

'Yeah don't worry,' the blonde said distractedly, all his attention dedicated to trying to shush the crying infant. If it hadn't been, he probably would have laughed at himself for even suggesting the Kazekage would worry about someone like him. He felt bad for having the kids pulled out of bed at such an hour, but if their safety was compromised, there was nothing he could do about it. Sticky fingers indeed.

'Shhhh~' he murmured soothingly, rocking the baby lightly as he kept a watchful eye on the sand. Shushing rarely worked with Naruto, and he doubted it would work with the pained little redhead, but if anyone had a better plan, Minato was willing to listen. 'Shhh~ it's okay baby. It's gonna pass. You'll be okay in no time, you'll see.'

Gaara didn't want to hear of that theory. To him, 'no time' was either in five seconds or not at all, given how little he knew about the concept of future. And what was the most important to him was now, and now he was in pain, so the whole reality could go and dance on the rooftop of the world, as long as it didn't have to do anything with his drama. And if it did – the bad future waited just a meter below. So he just kept on crying, communicating, that indeed, he still didn't feel very well.

A few steps behind the Kazekage walked upon the wall, holding both very sleepy kids on his arms, along with Yashamaru carrying their coats and three ANBUs that simply walked into the room where Minato was and sat in the highest points of the room, watching them both. As soon as the door had locked, they seemed to relax. One of them even took out the package with lunch.

'Man, I hate this job.' muttered the desert lark with orange stripes. 'He is going to go like that for hours, on and on and on and on. It's almost like neverending bad tune that keeps on being played non stop.'

'Whatever.' said the vulture, taking out the packet of dried meat he started on eating behind his mask 'I do it for money. The Kazekage pays a lot for this so I'm not gonna complain.'

'I don't think that money counts.' whispered the thorny devil. This time the voice belonged to female. 'I think it's our duty to sacrifice our lives to the most dangerous missions for the sake of the village.'

Both men laughed at her.

'You and your ideals, honey.' said the lark and stretched his hands 'Let's see what are you going to tell us when this little bastard tears your arm off. You know, monsters tend to be kinda cruel.'

'Like all babies.'

All three of them let out a rather snarky laugh, showing that if anything, they caught on the irony of the joke. None of them seemed to acknowledge the presence of Minato in the room, and when the door opened again, the laughter died like if it was cut off.

'If you will need my help, I will be nearby. I just need to relocate the family.' said Daichi. ANBUs nodded. When the door closed, the laughter had ended, almost like if they had waited with the paused movie for it to play again.

'Gods, I hate this job.' said the desert lark again, this time with much more viciousness. Neither of the ANBU spoke, all of them watching the baby. Gaara simply ignored all of them, crying his issues out.

Minato grit his teeth during the 'chat'- it wasn't the baby's fault he was feeling sick and he lacked complete control of the crazy demon someone had thought would be a great idea to stuff into his brittle little body. If anything it was his father's. Oh, and Minato's, who gave him milk the baby was horrendously allergic to. Oh, not to forget Yashamaru, who was right next to him and didn't tell him shit about why feeding the baby that sort of milk was bad.

Then again, given the killing intent the sand kept giving off and that just about everyone in this house had mentioned limbs being torn off at one point or another, the ANBU had good reasons to complain.

'Excuse me.' he said instead politely. 'You three have taken care of the baby before?'

'Quite so, Minato-sama.' muttered Lark around the mouthful of sandwich 'I had to change diapers to the baby scorpion's summon. I swear, if it wasn't for the fact it tried to plunk my heart out and poison my insides I'd find it kinda cute.'

'I have two kids at home.' added Vulture, stopping at chewing on the plaster of meat and tossing it to the sand. The stand stopped, dead in track, then simply covered it, making it go around with it, like a boat on the sand sea. 'I think they came out fine, especially the man eating shark one. I mean, it was sad to let it go, but sometimes the children have to leave the nest, so…' The rest died in laughter. The Thorned Devil didn't seem to be amused.

'I've been taking care of Jinchuuriki for past month. Before that I've briefly taken care of Kankuro-sama. Beside that I'm in assassination squad.'

'Go back to the kitchen, woman.' muttered the Vulture 'And kill me some S ranked soup, daddy has to play with the baby.'

'Eat your soup alone, pig.'

'I don't intend to. The baby doesn't want to share.' Three of them suddenly looked down at the piece of the meat that was still floating on the sand 'So I guess it's only you and me and our lover.'

'Great, I always loved threesomes in the living room.' muttered Lark. Somehow, neither of them seemed to be amused at that.

Used to snaky attitude from his own group back when he himself was an ANBU, Minato ignored every bit of it and settled his attention on the young woman instead, given how she seemed to be the only one remotely interested in making sense.

'Excuse me miss.' he asked instead, his hand moving mechanically in light strokes over the baby's back. In any other situation, he'd find it deafening, but truth was that compared to Naruto, who had inherited his mother's lungs, this was only discomforting. "In that case, I wonder if you can give me some advice on how to handle him? I know he is supposed to be top secret or something, but so far everyone tells me things right after I screw up, and I'm a single parent so I can't really afford getting killed at this moment.'

The mask looked back at him, empty and simplified, as every design for ANBU nin.

'Don't touch the jinchuuriki.' she said. 'But I think it's already too late for that. I'm not sure if I'm the right person, I don't take care of him daily. Only at emergencies.'

'Like diaper change.' piped up Lark.

'Or waking him up.' added the Vulture.

'Or sickness.'

'Or pains.'

'Or everything else.'

'Yeah, better ask his personal nanny, Yashamaru-sama.' said the Vulture sweetly.

Minato nodded lightly.

'I'd love to, but Yashamaru-san seems to be in a hissy fit and the fact the baby is acting like this is 70% his fault-' he paused. 'No, make that 80% his fault. He seems completely uninterested in being any kind of help, and given how I suspect he kind of hopes the baby will spread me open on the couch I'm open to alternate means of information.'

The ANBUs responded in silence. For a long moment only the rustling of the sand and the cry of the baby could be heard.

'Karura-sama being spread open on the couch was decisively not the best view one could see.' said finally Lark and the silence fell. It seemed that no one was eager to say anything else in response.

'That's not my fault. And I don't think my son deserves to become an orphan and be shipped back to my village like an unwanted package because he has a grudge with- well, I assume Kazekage-sama.'

Minato looked down at the baby, noted he was cradling him a little too tight and softened the hold, his hand going back to stroking his back. The ANBUs all rose their heads in unison, looking at each other.

'We're not saying it's anyone's fault-' started Vulture, once again resuming the eating '-neither that the children should be orphaned-'

'…especially not children of the kages. That's always terrible-' added Lark and bit the sandwich. The crumbs fell onto the sand, also going with the flow of the minerals. 'But if anything, we don't think anyone should lose sisters-'

'-or wives-' said Thorny Devil. Vulture nodded.

'-or mothers-'

'-or family at all.' ended Lark. It all sounded like the concert of said words on three people. 'And if anything, Yashamaru-sama doesn't throw a hissy fit. He is a very patient and loving person.'

'Yeah, who would take care of the killer who'd kill your own sister?' said the woman 'I mean, if anyone had touched my little Hiroko, I'd kill him right on the spot.'

All of them nodded.

'That's admirable.'

'That's beautiful.'

'He blames Gaara on 100%.'

They all laughed, automatically, almost like a machine.

'You know, Minato-sama.' said Lark suddenly, turning to the man with a hushed, almost parental tone 'I wouldn't speak so carelessly of members of this family. You're the guest, not them.'

Minato kept smiling at the trio, almost statically so.

'Well, uh- for one thing. I'm not a kage anymore. Just in case you forgot. If anything I'm a shamefully underpaid jounin. So you don't need to call me '-sama' or anything like that, please.'

Did he put a little too much emphasis on please? The lack of sleep probably was getting to him again. Some little voice inside his insisted on pointing out that losing his patience with a group of ANBU would accomplish nothing, but seeing their laughter at his situation, preaching at him about common guest courtesy and acting like if all of this as the poor baby's fault instead of the people rightfully in charge of him was a little too much at this moment.

'Now, given how it probably would be rude to point how the baby didn't a) ask to be born, b) ask to be possessed and c) is a baby, so placing a monstrosity in a being completely unable to manage it, and doing so with a shit seal wasn't the hottest of ideas, I won't. Skipping this fascinating talk about whose fault what was whatever and the intricacies of the royal family, and at the risk of sounding egocentric. Let's go back to me. Is there anywhere I shouldn't poke the baby, or any other food besides goats milk the baby can't get to, is there any song that will automatically cause him to go berserker and try eat my head, etcetera, etcetera?

The silence fell upon the three once again. Lark slowly put down the sandwich and started covering it in foliage. Obviously, he had enough food for this break.

'You're obviously not from here.' said Vulture with a tone that indicated that if anything, Minato hardly mingled with the society. And that sounded rather dangerous. 'And as for mere underpaid jounin you talk too much, Minato-sama. We're only elite ANBU, we don't know anything about how or why it has happened. Why would we judge anyone?'

The sound of chewing on raw meat was back. The cry of Gaara started to turn hoarse. The Thorny Devil moved her head to the side.

'The fact you're holding him is quite suicidal.' she said 'You should keep perfectly still or who knows what sand might think of you. It didn't find its enemy yet.'

The rest turned their empty gazes at him. Lark finally put down the sandwich.

'If you want to know so much, I don't give a damn what he likes or what he doesn't. This monster had tortured my wife to death when she tried to be nice to him and I don't even try to get close to him. This is just a tiring job you see.'

'I heard he likes to drink human's blood. That's why he kills every full moon.'

'I don't think there's any song he likes or not. He is kept in silence and lullabies are to make babies sleepy, not otherwise.' muttered kunoichi behind the mask 'I'm not even sure if he recognizes different sounds. His upbringing is poor.'

'Poor? He should be walking on his own by now. I know from experience. ' added Vulture 'But I'm really happy he doesn't. Think what would happen if he had walked outside.'

'Cutting both his legs would be a help.'

'So far, he can only roll around, so it's not a problem.'

Minato felt childishly pleased at the sudden animosity, but given how petty that was, he did his best to ignore it, instead giving his attention back to the three ANBU. The jab was easy to ignore, being far away from the usual and rather narrowed list of things that ticked him off.

At the comment on the sand he looked down at the thing slowly sawing odd the couch legs- what a pity, it was a quite nice, comfortable couch. Given how new it looked, he doubted it was the first time this happened. He noted the mention of the full moon- chakra in general always was at its strongest during it, so it made some sort of twisted sense that creatures created out of raw, insane amounts of it would also be affected.

Kushina always got frisky and went a little overboard with the violence in these days, only to be at her calmest just a few days later with the new moon. Naruto was still too young to show any sort of changes, but before he started this routine of constant wailing, he had been rather alert at the time, or as much a very tiny baby just a few weeks old could be.

Luckily for him, they were nowhere near this month's full phase of it yet.

The Lark- masked ANBU's words made him still in the spot, however, slowly looking away from the trio and back at the sandy slab of meat going round and round on the floor. After a moment, he noted it was mimicking the pattern he himself was tracing on the baby's back and stopped.

'…I'm very sorry about your wife.'

It was horrible, but the baby couldn't be blamed for something like that. If nothing else, someone should be researching seals and seeing what went wrong and how to fix it.

Another strange thing was how the little redhead seemed to be slightly below the development stage of a baby his age. Besides the obvious changes (like sprouting meat-eating teeth that destroyed bottle nipples weekly when the baby was nowhere close to being weaned), Naruto was a very healthy, very plump baby, who could easily be mistaken for at least a couple months older than he really was. Kushina had been rather, well- round-faced when they had been at the academy, so he was willing to put it down to genes, but even so, he had thought a bijuu made its jiinchuriki stronger.

Minato was no wonder in the tan department, but the baby was positively ivory, and those bags around and under his eyes…

'Yeah, so am I.' uttered Lark and leaned on the wall behind him. When the wall shifted, he went back to the straight position. Both other ANBUs laughed at him. 'Oh, can it, it's not easy to remember all dangerous spots in this house.'

'Says you.' said the woman, then cracked her neck. 'Value your life a bit more, will you? We have to be ready once he will get tired of crying.'

Three of them stopped and looked at the baby. Gaara still kept on emitting loud hoarse yells.

'Well, if I know right, we still have at least few minutes.' added Vulture, slowly ending his supper 'Kazekage-sama should be back by then.'

'I'd rather have him off our backs.' said Lark, obviously in bad mood now 'Remember that time when Gaara went straight for his head? I almost shat my pants then-'

'Shut up.' muttered the woman. The silence fell again. Now this seemed more interesting than anything so far.

'So far I've seen it-' Minato gestured to the sand, who now had broken pattern and was moving a bit more sluggishly, as if it wanted to continue the same circles but wasn't very sure how it was supposed to. 'So far, I've only seen it go at him with blunt strikes.'

Mostly to push him away or smack him out of the baby's immediate radius of existence.

'Because usually it's just blunt strikes. Pushes or shoves.' said Lark, as he moved to one side, like if his head had weighted too much 'But at the times he gets just really angry and then… he goes for a kill.'

'Usually the sand tends to toss him and then doesn't leave him alone. ' added Vulture. 'Then it's waterfall of sand or he just grabs him and tosses him around… not funny if you see how many objects is around there.'

'But it's still nothing. I'd say it's roughening up, even if a bad landing could break his spine.' added the woman 'When he wants to kill someone he… just does. At that time he simply caught him in the sand and started pulling.'

The nervous laughter could be heard in the air.

'I wonder if he still has the scar after the broken skin.'

'I heard his insides fell out.'

'Are you stupid? If they would, he'd be dead.'

That much, Minato couldn't know, everyone in Suna except for some academy kids and the occasional young girls usually wore clothing that covered them from the neck to ankles, and the Kazekage was no different. And it's not like if he could catch him on the nonexistent local hot springs. Other than the ones in his hands, he hadn't noted any other scars on the man, not that he had been looking particularly hard.

'Can it attack things the baby can't see?' kids this young didn't have much of an object permanence, so if he couldn't see it, it didn't exist. 'Is it affected by genjutsu?'

All three of them have laughed.

'Is there really a thing it cannot see?' asked one of the men, shrugging a little ' Shukaku is a demon born before the time and space or maybe even earlier and it knows too much about everything containing chakra.'

'Gaara doesn't have to see the threat.' added the other one 'He will be protected automatically. And it dispels genjutsu no matter if Gaara likes it or not.'

Three of them sighed in unison.

'And it was so beautiful once Yashamaru made the baby believe he was Karura-sama…' said the woman with remorse in her voice 'The kid had calmed down almost instantly and it was just too good to be true…'

'And then this big laughing face emerged and formed the clone of Karura-sama. That wasn't funny.'

'Needless to say, Yashamaru-sama won't remove those bandages from his legs until he dies.'

Minato shuddered a little.

'That's just creepy…'

He was referring to the monster inhabiting the little body taking it's mother's shape, but now that he thought about it, having to impersonate his dead sister to calm down her son couldn't have been a stroll in the park for Yashamaru either.

Sighing, he looked down at the baby, whose face was almost as red as his hair from the crying. He didn't like the scratchy tone of voice at all, he was probably hurting his vocal chords. How come he hadn't calmed down one bit?

'If you don't mind, could anyone please get me a bottle with water?'

'Here, take mine.' said Lark, and tossed him his own bottle 'I'm already done with my lunch anyway.'

'Thank you. I meant for the baby, but I won't say no to some water myself.'

'I'll get it.' said the woman and walked away on the wall. Not very soon the clinking of the utensils could be heard in the other room.

'Don't waste too much!' added Vulture, though it seemed to be a useless comment. A moment later, the bottle with a dummy on it ventured through the wall on the spider puppet.

'Is it cold enough or should I do another one?' could be heard from the kitchen. The white stripeless mask of the desert scavenger made it travel through the air, though no chakra strings or jutsus could be seen.

'Good enough.' he said and tossed it at Minato 'Don't try to push it through or it won't end up good.'

'Thank you.' Minatp looked down at the baby, wincing again at the quality of his voice and not feeling very hopeful about the immediate outcome, but not really able to think of anything else.

'Baby…' he called softly pulling the bottle up in hopes the baby might see it and have even a passing interest on it.

The baby didn't seem to have the slightest interest in it. It was hurting openly now and the only thing that existed in its world was the internal pain he couldn't remove. Yep. Baby wasn't even inclined to stop screwing his ears off. Out of nothing better to do, he tried to press the nipple of the bottle to his lower lip, just a gentle pressure to remind him there were things in this world besides whatever was going on behind his closed eyes. Things like water, even.

Gaara had immediately moved his head to the side, getting away from anything that wanted to get to his lips right now. He didn't even open his eyes for that, but the move was so sudden, he had almost rolled out of Minato's hold. Thankfully, the sand was there to hold him up.

And Minato nearly jumped off the wall in reaction- after such a nice tea-party worthy conversation of ripped legs and broken spines, the least he wanted was the sand anywhere near his persona, but it seemed to be oblivious to him and merely intending to straighten the baby back up.

When it finally moved away, the blonde took a deep breath, a better grip on the infant and tried again, this time letting a drop or two of water to fall into the widely opened mouth.

'Come on baby, cooperate. Life's about teamwork.'

The baby didn't cooperate, but quieted for a moment to swallow the drops of water. The green eyes opened at him, now full of pink as the whites positively changed the color for darker. The taste of water was not helping, but distracting indeed.

'I know, I know baby.' The blonde cooed lightly, trying to offer him the bottle again. 'Want to try to have a bit more? Just for me? Please~?'

Whoever said it was unmanly of men to beg obviously hadn't dealt with a baby that cried nonstop with nothing you could do to help stop it.

The redhead didn't close his eyes this time. The voice of the man was something that didn't happen before, and he already recognized it as something that relieved the hardships previously. So, when the bottle was at his lips again, he didn't turn his head sideways, and just slowly let it being pushed in his mouth. The loud cry changed into a muffled whine, broken by the swallowing of the liquid.

'Yes, there~' the blonde said again in the soft, affectionate tones from before, even if internally he was throwing a parade. He couldn't believe that had worked. It usually didn't with his own mini me. At all. 'Good baby~'

Now how the hell was he going to work his baby suit open so he could put some of that (hopefully magical) cold ointment on him?

The three ANBUs looked at each other, obviously amazed, even if not much could be seen from behind their masks. The baby went quiet while drinking water, even if the sand didn't really calm down. Some of it had completely stopped, making it look like if rivers of sand had moved through the specifically made tunnels, also from the sand.

'Need… help with something?' asked Vulture, looking at both of them. Though by now, he didn't really believe he could help anything if the managed to calm the baby by giving him freaking water.

'Yes. Yes please.' Minato said immediately, voice carrying some of the strain he was internally feeling, before forcing himself to shut it down for when he had actually time to go into hysterics. 'I need someone to please help me hold this bottle so I can put some of the salve Kazekage-sama gave me.' he looked down at the baby, still lazily sucking on the bottle and obviously uncomfortable, but for the moment somewhat agreeable. 'Just be careful.'

'Right on it.' said the woman, the bluish strings of chakra holding up right around the bottle, kneading into nice pattern of spider web. A moment later the sound wave blew from it, very lightly, making the Gaara's hair move at it.

'I'm supporting the eventual fall too.' added the vulture. The redhead didn't seem to be very surprised by what was happening. He stopped for a moment and let out a choked sob, but then resumed on eating.

'Oh I love practical women.' Minato gave them an overly bright smile as he quickly worked the buttons holding Gaara's shift closed 'If you weren't busy with your threesome I'd offer marriage to at least one of you.'

And now- baby.

'There, there baby, I know it hurts.' he said slowly, carefully shifting around until he could grasp the egg-shaped flask thing in his hand. It wasn't easy to open with just one hand, but he wasn't called a genius for nothing, so after trying to will it open and finally managing to catch on edge with the finger hold of one of his shuriken, it popped open, it's creamy contents instantly starting to steam cold air. He left it on the kunai holder on his hip among the weaponry.

'There you go, nice and cold, see?' he shoved the baby the bit of cream gathered in his hand. 'This is gonna make you feel better, little red.'

'Thanks, half of us is already taken.' answered Vulture enigmatically, not losing the trait on the bottle for a moment. However, Lark seemed to tense as the child was undressed.

'I don't like the way he looks.' he muttered. Both ANBUs shot him a glance, but didn't stop on their jutsus.

'Pink eyes, tense muscles, blooming insides, frowning brows-' started reciting the man with the speed of light, actually seeming to remind of the squawking lark for a moment. '-I really don't like it!'

'Be ready.' said Vulture, and all of them stopped in their stances, observing.

Gaara didn't really react to being shown naked to the air, however he stopped sucking on the bottle once he looked at the balm. He frowned, and the whole sand under them had also stopped, like if it was confused at what had just happened. Or maybe just spotted the prey.

The adrenaline in Minato's body kept trying to make it tense and probably leap away from the perceived danger, and all he could do to stop it was mentally recite academy advice to work your body language to act as unthreatening as possible.

_Hands below eye level_

_Keep them small and unthreatening_

_Steady, but loose_

_Casual. Just act casual _

'It's just balm baby. It will do you good. Want to touch it?' he inched it closer; offering the white balm for the baby to touch and convince himself it wasn't a bad thing. 'Go on, you'll like it.'

As an answer, the redhead started crying yet once again. And thus, the sand started going through the floor in the repeated patterns just like before. If it wasn't for the fact that the bottle was held by two people now, it would probably fall down and be forgotten forever. It seemed that just as much as the balm looked threatening to Gaara, his focus had too short range to keep on wondering now.

For a moment Minato nearly jumped out of his skin, thinking the wail was a battle cry claiming his head and not just complaining. He leaned his back against the wall, reaching to wipe as his forehead- and just smearing the some of the balm on it.

'Ugh.' and yet he couldn't find in himself the strength to complain. He used the back of his palm to wipe at the smudge, noticing the strong minty smell and finding it quite pleasant, given how mint was immediately associated with refreshment in his mind.

He could use another cup of mint tea right now. Or seven.

'Okay, baby.' he sighed, carefully brushing what was left of the balm on the back of one small pale hand. 'One more try.'

Gaara didn't think that 'one more try' was a good idea. Actually, he didn't think that any 'try' was a good idea at all, especially that nothing so far the man has done was to distract him and not help him. He liked the tone of his voice and he liked the fact he was held in warm arms and not in always dark, always lonely and always cold cradle left to cry out to death, but that was changing nothing. He was hurting and that was what mattered, cushy arms or not.

So, in an answer, he tried kicking Minato again, only to burst into loud wailing. Moving was not a good idea and he tended to forget about that.

'I know, I know, baby.' and this was taking him nowhere. Baby was too wrapped up on his hurt to pay him any mind, so adjusted him on his grip again (and he swore, babies were sometimes harder to handle than freshly caught fish in terms of wrigglyness) and scooped some more balm in his hand.

He took a deep breath, steeling himself and taking a good grip of the wall with his feet, ready to leap. Not that it would help much if he was carrying the baby in his arms, but one had to try.

'If I die, please make sure someone takes care of my baby until someone from home comes pick him up.'

And he quickly smeared the balm on the pale tummy.

'Like if we would live to thatohmygodshedidit.' Said Thorny Devil and stilled, the two remaining ANBUs with her. For a moment they waited, the sand stopping dead in track. The redhead had slowly ceased the crying, looking up, his naked skin moving in rapid breathing it was taking. For a moment it seemed that he was confused if that hurt him or not and if to continue crying. It took him another three seconds to decide that it didn't smother him as much as he wanted to and to break into another litany of sobbing.

And then, the sand started moving upwards.

'Look out, it's coming!' shouted Lark and the bottle was immediately forgotten. In a quick hand seal, the sand burst against the sound barrier just in the half of the wall and changed into the roaring face of the angry monster.

'Stay out of this!' the blonde said back, more loudly than the baby provably appreciated, but what the hell. These people had families of their own and it wasn't their fault he had to stick his nose in possessed baby's bedrooms. He didn't want more deaths of innocents in his conscience. In a panic, he looked at the sand- still too far away, if he jumped now it would guess his trajectory and intercept him. Quickly, he rubbed the salve on the supple, milky skin, his mouth running with him.

'Baby, please, _please_, just give me a second-'

Gaara, of course, wouldn't want to hear anything about that. He didn't like the noise, he didn't like the feel of the power being used next to him yet again – that was pretty stressful for all he had experienced with jutsus – and he didn't like how the cold tried to crawl on his skin again and again. In a cry he tried to turn around in the hold – to actually get away from the ointment seeping into him, and he caught one of Minato's fingers, trying to push it away. The Vulture's hands obviously started to shake.

'I don't think I will hold on too long, we have to get out of here.' he muttered. As an answer, the web from chakra strings was shown toward the window.

'Hokage-sama, you first!' shouted Lark 'Drop the baby and go!'

'What's with you Sunanins and dropping babies?' the blonde hissed, looking at the sand, and the ANBU and back at the baby. 'I'm not dropping a baby- stop trying to convince me to do it!'

Possessed or not, he was not throwing this child away. He didn't care if it was possessed, he didn't care that the sand would likely catch him and much less that many people already had done it before and wouldn't think less of him for doing- He. Wasn't. He looked again at the raccoon- the raccoon looked back, angrily. These things only happened to him.

'There, all done. Look, I'm covering you back up, you see?' Making quick work of the cold cream, he started working the small button- Kages, why did baby clothing have these ridiculously tiny buttons? 'Please, understand me, baby.'

Gaara let out an annoyed wail, but then, suddenly hushed down, only looking at Minato with distressed glare. It seemed he was once again thinking about if he felt hurt or if he didn't and he couldn't decide. The sand slowly started melting, though the black eyes still held the hostile glare.

'Okay, I'm letting go and if you want to be killed then we have to stay along your side.' said Vulture and the sound wave vanished. The sand leapt up and immediately fell down in a grotesque jump.

The ANBUs looked at it in silence and finally let their breath go.

'Next time I'm knocking you out.' said Lark in a friendly tone. Then the window opened and the Kazekage walked in.

'Why is the kid not crying?' he asked. The ANBUs once again felt silent.

'Stop complaining and be careful with the sand on the floor, it was jumping just now.' the blonde said tiredly, wanting to take some of all this pent up tension on someone and seeing the redhead as perfect target. 'What, you *want* him crying? You can hold him while he does.'

But it seemed like at least the magical salve was magical after all, because the baby was still fussy and sniffly, but at least wasn't wailing his head off.

'Good baby.' the blonde said tiredly, pulling the baby closer and rubbing his cheek lightly against the soft red hair. 'Just stay calm and it'll pass soon, all right?'

'You say it to me while rubbing your cheek against his hair when he is ready to rip everything to shreds.' answered Daichi and walked up to the ceiling until he was actually hanging from it upside down. 'I don't want him doing anything and I would rather you stop getting so touchy feely with knife. You can poke your eye out.'

And as he said that Gaara had only let out a tired huff, almost like if he was brushing off the stress and closed his eyes, actually turning his wet, covered in snot face toward the source of warmth. The intentions were here far from killing ones.

'By the way, the ANBU no. 2 here has the ability to stop the sand with the sound barrier. So if he spreads it you can drop the brat and go home, like you wanted to.'

That made Lark look up at Minato, but with the mask on it was hard to say what was going on his mind.

'For hopefully the last time…' the blonde muttered, sounding exhausted. 'I am not. Tossing. The baby.' Hadn't these people heard of shaken baby syndrome? Sand could protect his squishy organs with steel plates if it wanted, but he was willing to be that if he shook the baby like a maraca his squishy brain was going to end like a fresh egg stirred. Messily. Baby was again a mess, but at least a calm mess. He might even ask for something to clean him off. Any moment now.

'And yes, yes, I already proposed to them and their sheer awesome, but they are already in committed relationships. My heart bleeds.'

The kazekage had only uncrossed his arms and looked at the ANBUs with a little surprised, but not amused expression.

'I assume you grew attached to Gaara and you don't really want to go home, though I never heard of much crazier thing.' he muttered. Didn't the man want to see his own kid or what? It was already midnight and Gaara was at the peak of his gruesome powers coming to life, as soon as his skin would stop absorbing the things from ointment. 'Fine, I will stay by your side along with your broken heart, but mind the fact that I can't propose many other ways of getting out of this.'

'I'm not -attached- you don't- you just don't-' Minato rubbed a hand on his face in frustration, then huffed and rolled his eyes when he noticed it still had smudges of ointment and he had smeared them on himself. Again.

'You don't. Toss. Babies. They break if you toss them. So you don't.'

And he did want to go home. He wanted to go home and get his own baby and cuddle him and even hear him shriek like a banshee a while, and then crawl to the basement and maybe get drunk or high or cry himself to sleep and not get out for a week or two.

'I'll just. I'll think of something. Eventually.' He sighed deeply, shoulders sagging. 'You'll see, it'll be awesome. You'll wish you had thought of it first.'

And this would have looked so much more convincing if Minato hadn't looked like if the only thing holding him up was the chakra gluing him to the wall and concentrated sarcasm.

'…'Tebbane, indeed.' And he laughed, short and deep on his chest, shoulders shaking lightly.

'It's hard to believe, but if you want to be stubborn, I'm not going to stop you. So far you're doing better than my previous twenty seven nannies so it would be bad to let you go so quickly.' said the Kazekage and sat up on the ceiling with legs bended. Vulture let out a light snarky giggle.

'You live up to your name, Hokage-sama.' he muttered.

'And this baby doesn't break.' added Lark, but it was more _I'm pointing this out only to not say that I didn't say so_. 'We can still do the operation.'

'Ever heard of what happens to shaken babies? It's not nice.' The blonde replied, obviously miffed by the comments. 'I don't think the sand will keep his brain from rattling against the insides of his skull.'

The ANBUs looked at each other, obviously surprised. As it seemed, such modern ideas of 'how to take care of a toddler' didn't reach the core of this village yet.

'That explains a lot about some things.' muttered Daichi, then looked down at Gaara. 'Do you need an energy pill?'

Minato looked at the man for the strange comment, but at the offer for pills he looked down at the baby, wondering If he should accept. Taking one meant at the very least twelve hours of wide wakefulness. In the case he managed to get out, he would never be able to sleep.

On the other hand, who knew when the baby would feel like letting him go?

'…more like a box. But yes, one would be nice. Thank you.'

'Very well.' said the redhead and simply walked up to the man on the arm length. A moment later the little scarlet pill was pushed up Minato's mouth with a manner that was lacking any kind of gentleness. 'Bite through, those are not to be swallowed.'

Minato gave the man's finger a not-too gentle nip, eyebrows raised in the most eloquent of ways on regards of personal space and what was considered breaching, then obediently bit on the pill.

And nearly dropped off the wall.

'Augh, God.' he coughed, feeling his eyes water as if someone had punched him pretty harshly in the nose. And this wasn't even spicy! 'What is this made of? Are you sure this isn't for the torture squad?'

If the word bitter could somehow be turned into a solid, with watch and every last with of its significant and significant squeezed on top. This is what it would taste like.

'No, wait. I get it, it's the taste that keeps you awake.'

'Actually, no. It's blue pills that keep you awake with taste. And it washes off after a week. This is merely attacking one of your senses. I guess this one went for the sense of taste. Since Temari decided to mix them all up, I can never tell.' said the man and simply brushed his finger against the man's lips, like if he was wiping them – and surely there was nothing nice within such move. Then he simply pushed the man up the wall, holding him lightly with all five fingers near the collarbone. 'Can I let you go? You won't fall down?'

The sand rustled, being aware of the disturbance in the area of the redhead's sight. Gaara frowned, looking up at the man and the scent. He didn't like it so close. The sand slowly showed the fangs.

'I'm sorry to interrupt, but please, move away, Kazekage-sama.' muttered the Thorny Devil, making the shortcut toward the ceiling. If anything, the man chose the worst time to flirt and did it with the worst taste she had ever seen so far. And she had seen him bedding many people.

Minato pushed at the hand, not really aggressively, more in a distracted, annoyed way. Obviously what the redhead had done didn't really register in any spectrum of 'flirting' as far as standards of Konohanin went.

'Thank you or your concern, but I think I'm better off with you on the other side of the room. Baby doesn't seem to like you very much and you are agitating it.'

'Of course – my bad.' muttered the Kazekage and moved back to his previous position. Gaara once again had calmed down, yet his gaze didn't stop observing the people surrounding him. He didn't do much of anything else for the upcoming hour, and then, he burst into tears again. The balm was helping only so much.


	4. No Four

'Since when are you a medinin?'

That hadn't been a very nice question, not out of purposeful rudeness as much as sheer exhaustion. The pill was doing its job and keeping Minato away and slightly hyped, but it did nothing to take the weariness off him. And he had plenty of that to spare.

It had taken most of the night for the redhead to finally start calming down, roughly seven life-risking attempt to get the balm on him, another bottle of water, one of watered down special milk, and one diaper change. His mind felt like if it was ready to cave in, and maybe that's why he didn't really find it strange to be there, sitting on a chair all bent forward, without a shirt on and the Kazekage carefully stitching the new slices on his back. As it turned out, it was preferable for Gaara to latch onto him. Because when he lost contact? Like, when you tried to change his diaper? He tried to latch onto you with sand hands. And those were ripped with sharp sand nails.

So, one very awkward and almost heroic standing-up diaper change later that had the Lark ANBU nursing a concussion while Minato just looked at the one again soothed and perfectly docile baby in his arms, happily chewing on his necklace like if nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

'Since I have learned that not all medics are destined to do their jobs right.' muttered the older redhead, slowly but steadily stitching the gap on the man's back. Sure, it looked atrocious and so did the two other already stitched wounds, but he couldn't help but enjoy the view in front of him – rippling muscles on rather slender body, all sweaty and warm, just waiting for him to cover it with all possible fluids and likes. Of course, he was not prone to acting on a whim, so he just let his fingers brush the spine a little, but beside that, he didn't try to do anything else. 'Besides, when you're a kage it's easier to help yourself than to expect help from others.'

In the end, he was the first line of attack and the meat to be chewed upon by the first hunger of an enemy. A though meat but still meat. He moved his nostrils lightly, smelling the tiredness, salt and the pill in Minato's sweat. Almost adorable, but not really.

'And you can sew your own back without resorting to clones?' the younger man said in a perfectly balanced mixture of playfulness and plain snark 'Impressive.'

In other circumstances, he probably would have wondered why the redhead was doing this when the other two ANBU were probably as well prepared as anyone else in the field to tend to minor wounds like these, but eight now he was too busy trying to figure out what he was going to do next. Besides the obvious trying to survive.

Instead he only seemed to be able to concentrate on the barely-there freckles on the bridge of Gaara's nose and counting the stitches the redhead was giving him. He had accumulated fifty-three so far, and he supposed with some luck he'd be getting a few less than one hundred. That and he heat. Because the sun was back up and working double time to go back to baking them alive.

'One gets into impossible heights to survive if one wants to live.' said the kazekage simply, adding the finishing touches to the wound. It was better to have it overseen that too loose. Gangrene was not a laughing matter. 'There, you're done. I'm going to wash my hands and get some sleep. Want to join me?'

'Of course. We could bring the baby along.' the blonde laughed lightly at that, seemingly nice and happily, if you ignored the bitter undertone 'We'll have one big sleepover.'

He looked down at the baby, once again brushing lightly at the marks around his eyes. When baby slept, bijuu took over. Suna looked as solid and stable a village in the middle of a very big sea of sand, just as it always had.

'…how do you keep him awake all the time?'

'I just do what he doesn't want me to do.' said the man, brushing his eyes in a tired gesture. 'Put on the loud sounds, make the room smell bad, make him feel threatened or even start a fight with him – whatever it takes for him to stay awake. In a few months his nervous system will be damaged permanently and he will get the insomnia with casual periods of sleepiness, then we will all rest but now… he is hanging somehow so you have to be insomniac for him. Parental sacrifices and all that shit.'

With that he laughed a bit ironically and threw the shirt straight at the baby, making it meep with a startled squeal.

'Just don't sing him lullabies or he will get bored easily.'

Minato casually caught it before it managed to hit the infant. Not that it would damage him, but it just seemed unnecessary. Though well looked at, the worst that could happen was mourning the loss of a shirt that had already been half torn to shreds and was probably beyond salvation.

'It worked that way with the other Jinchuuriki?'

Damaged. Wasn't there any other way of describing it?

He would have thought that insomnia would be a normal side effect of receiving the One-tail, but if he thought about it, it made sense for the hosts body to have to adapt in self-defense. The unnatural amount of chakra probably explained why being awake for such extended periods hadn't killed the baby either, but even so, Minato had been getting less than three hours of sleep a night for the past two weeks and he was already wanting to alternatively kill himself or kill someone else. He didn't want to imagine a life of constant lack of sleep. Enforced awake fullness also explained other things.

'And that's why he looks so small?'

Daichi let out another humorless laugh. 'Worked' wasn't exactly the right word for it.

'It was the right solution to some extent.' he muttered, looking at the infant with a slight frown. 'But then the readings stop being readable after some point, so I can't really tell how far it goes…'

Well… that was a little lie. As far as he managed to read into the personal diary of Second Kazekage the readings became more and more scribbled down, but not unreadable. Actually, they were pretty clear – the man was going out of his mind. It all started with hearing voices, then with seeing things, then plotting completely senseless plans about shutting the voices up – and then the logic started to crumble, concentrating only on more or less important spots in life. The Second could write for hours how good was the dinner he ate – literally, it took him seven pages to write down that he liked his meat juicy – only to mention that if he could kill his secretary again he would, because nothing tasted better than the human body. There were long letters to his former self followed by just as long answers and the angry letters in which he was cursing his own life and curiosity that pushed him into this, also spiraling down to one thing – insanity. The man had too weak psyche to bear with it and there was nothing stopping him from the fall. There was no guarantee that the same wouldn't happen here – but it was already done and the problem would have to be dealt in its own time – if it happened (maybe it wouldn't).

'He eats too little, sleeps too little, probably yes.' he muttered, dodging dark thoughts aside 'There's nothing to worry about though – the demon won't let him starve to death, so he will develop either way.'

Minato didn't answer to that, instead hugging the baby a little closer.

The Kazekage had a lot of luck about having such a sweet natured child (obviously it had taken after the mother rather than him). Kids in general got fussy with lack of sleep, but considering the baby probably hadn't gotten a shut-eye for longer than he had, this one so far was very easy to please. And unless one tried to scare him or attack him or pry him off from where he wanted to be, he was downright sweet.

He tried to imagine someone like Kushina without her eight hours of beauty sleep. The ensuing shudder rattled all the lovely new stitches on his back, making him hiss lightly. And he only knew her as a preteen. He didn't want to think of her as a baby, even if he had secretly really, really wished Naruto would turn out to be a red-haired little girl. One that would hopefully come with her mother's lovely looks and his own agreeable temper.

Somehow he felt he had been had by both his lover and his baby.

'There's no need for you to stay here. You should go get some rest, village to run and all that,' he made a gesture towards the group of ANBU 'I'll just stay here and enjoy Lark's two minutes worth of short term memory span.'

Cerebral commotions were just so much fun.

'Ah, the one with concussion-…' said Daichi, turning to the three of ANBUs. '…is there anyone who can help you here?'

Both Vulture and Devil looked at him, their masks neutral.

'Jerboa had retired three weeks ago.' muttered the man. The Lark looked around nervously, then looked up and then his gaze fell on Gaara and he tensed up. The Vulture shot him a glance and went back to look at the kazekage. It was almost like if he was in a time warp or something.

'Cactus Wren should be still on his duty.' muttered the Devil. Tiredness showed through her voice, even if she looked like if she could go through three of the same nights.

'Great, call him- and do something about him.' said Daichi, just waving the man off. The Lark once again looked up and tensed. For umpteenth time today.

Gaara had only gurgled in babyese and tried to reach out for something that was above him – probably Minato's nose, if not anything else. It was such a new entertaining thing after all.

'Baby's calm, no one's hurt!' Minato informed helpfully, showing the now very settled baby to the man. Maybe it was funny to see him like this, but if the thirty or forty seconds he was stuck in where the ones after the floor had grown monstrous sand claws and tried to bodily stuck him to the baby, he couldn't really blame him for being paranoid. He let the next turn for the teammates, however, going back to the Kazekage.

'Help for what?' the blonde shrugged slightly, avoiding the first swap and catching the little hand on the second. 'All I'd need help with is changing him, and doing it standing isn't as impossible as we originally though, is it?'

He smiled.

'Don't worry for me. I promise your precious economical settlement will be more or less in one piece until you finish your nap.'

'I'd rather overpay one ANBU than see how your stomach looks from the inside.' muttered the redhead, not even looking down at the man as he ascended the stairs. 'Call the Wren.'

'Yes, my lord.' muttered the Lark, obviously not knowing why they were supposed to do that, and getting first to the phone. A few moments later, after a fight for the receiver, the very heated conversation pun around with the panicked Lark, Thorny Devil trying to calm him down, stressed Vulture and confused voice on the other side of the line – probably the mentioned Wren. Gaara didn't find the situation any more entertaining than Minato's hand he managed to caught, so, he was calmly trying to gnaw his nail off.

'Ah, but I bet it's an ever so pretty greenish pink?' Minato sighed, leaning on one shoulder given how his back wasn't really enthusiastic about being pressed against anything at this particular moment. He watched the three ANBU

'Seriously baby,' he muttered on the little redhead's ear. 'If you want to do it, better hurry before someone competent comes along.'

#+#+#+#+#+#

'What do you put in death certificates for records?'

Minato was now leaning against the back of the couch, carefully angled so only the upper part of his back touched the piece of furniture. His knees were slightly bent, mostly because if he was bent all over like a pretzel he could hold the redhead up against his chest without hand, leaving them free for other things.

Things like holding coffee mugs (bitter) and playing with very dangerous but ever so adorable babies. If he ran his finger from between Gaara's eyes and over the bridge of his nose , the little redhead would try to follow it with eyes, automatically close his eyes when he gave the tip a small poke, and then make a demanding sound he was freely interpreting as 'more!'.

If it had been 'less', he was pretty sure he'd be missing a limb or two by now, so he felt his supposition to be very accurate.

''Death by baby?'. That's not something I'd want in my ninja card. 'Death by Jinchuuriki'? 'Death by Infant Jinchuuriki'? Oh, what about 'Victim of maulation by possessed pretoddler'- no, wait. Maulation isn't a word.'

'Unknown location.' muttered the new ANBU as he kept on writing something in the notepad. His mask had three blue stripes, suiting his grey ANBU clothes. The others were simply quiet, looking at how Minato played with a baby. It was fascinating at first how it hadn't bitten his hands off, but after some time it got pretty dull. He was acting like an average baby after all. Average baby with a very long attention span. 'Currently missing. Unidentified skeleton. Male arm. Female leg. Human bits. Too mauled to recognize. Why, do you want to choose some?'

The blonde laughed under his breath, not that the comment or the examples had been really funny. They just seemed so to his overtaxed mind. The pill was working as good as ever, and he hadn't nodded off once in the past several hours so it seemed Suna really was an apothecary's wet dream after all. All this wakefulness was taking its toll on his brain, though, and the coffee wasn't helping.

'Anything that doesn't include how I was torn to bits by a little human who still can't eat solids will do. My student wouldn't let me rest in piece of he found out.'

He was used to having Kakashi away. He was used to not seeing him for days, weeks, month, and he was very used to worrying himself sick when the young Hatake was away in missions where he didn't know if he was going to come back or not, so why did he miss him so terribly now?

Oh that's right- he'd likely never see him again.

Minato couldn't leave Wind country and because of silly political problems (silly political assassinations) that happened between Kakashi's father and only about the most important bloodline in Suna, kages in rule tried to refrain from rubbing raw the already quite strained civility between their villages and never really sent him anywhere near.

It wasn't very mature, but if the man hadn't been dead already, he would have killed him again just for sport. It seemed that he only managed to keep ruining things for Kakashi. Minato tried to think as little as possible about it, but the truth was that he was very worried about what would happen to his only remaining student without him around to force him into some semblance of socializing. He wanted to tell himself Kakashi was perfectly able to defend himself and be on his own without anyone's support, but all that came to mind was the white haired boy in his creepy little white-and-so-impersonal department that smelled vaguely of too much bleach and too little actual living in it.

'My student…' he startled when the baby suddenly tried to bounce in his lap. He had stopped the 'game' and with a quick apologetic smile, he used this time his thumbs to smooth the redhead's brow, following the line of a very visible eye socket. 'Do you guys get genin teams of three here too?'

He had heard kids were being taught in groups by single teacher even after academy during the war, but he had no idea if that was still in use.

'Depends on the times.' murmured the Vulture, cracking his neck 'I was taught in pairs, because there were too little people. But the first year who just entered was taught in group.'

It was fault of demographics' boom, the year of more births again. He couldn't honestly tell which way was better to be taught.

'It was lonely in pair, but that's how I met my wife at least.'

Minato nodded in agreement- he had been taught in the standard three-man-group formation, but both Kenta and Tetsuo had died early on, and then he had been just shuffled around in different groups depending on the necessities of the other jounin teacher. Because as usual, his own hadn't been there.

He didn't want to think about Jiraiya and what he had or not done when he should have, so instead he brought out of his pocket what was left from the seal. He had already memorized it while the Kazekage had gone sleep, in that idyllic pause before the little redhead had gotten sick, so he could afford loosing it now. Now that the symbols on the corners made any more sense to him.

'This seal is all wrong.' he said, extending his hand behind Gaara so he wouldn't try to catch it. 'Why don't you try to do something better?'

Three masks had looked at him with indifference, the Wren didn't even stop his writing, even though he clearly stopped looking at the paper. Then they just got back to their previous positions.

'It's not wrong, it's old.' he said, looking at his writings. 'It's unfinished seal the Second Kazekage used on himself when he went out of his mind. Apparently, the formula was inherited or passed down as it looks the same.'

'It wasn't passed down, it was copied from old writings he wanted to be burned along his body.' muttered the Thorny Devil as she looked out of the window at the wavering air. The heat started rising to inhuman lengths on the open spaces. 'My mother told me he kept on using millions of different tags nobody had ever seen before and that many of them had been destroyed at his last will and testament. I guess it's because it works the best – so it's used.'

'It's because nothing else works.' muttered Vulture, waving both his gloved hands at it like if he wanted to push away the bad omen 'If we command the sand to stop, the walls will collapse. If we command the jinchuuriki to stop, we will be buried to our necks. If we command the chakra to stop…'

They looked at each other and then burst into laughing.

'…yeah, rivers overflow and flowers bloom.'

'And then we have visitors from space.'

'And dead people stand up from the graves.'

Yes, that was stupid.

Minato looked at the trio, then back down at the half-burnt paper, admiring how pretty the dots and softly curved lines looked- and still having no idea what they were for.

So, they weren't using it because they didn't have anything better- they were using it because not only didn't they not have it, they also had no idea how it worked, and thus couldn't really *make* anything more efficient. What surprised him was how no one seemed to be trying.

'Do you at least know what these weird writings here mean?'

He could guess what one or two could be based on the way they were arranged, but the rest were lost to him.

'I know.' said Wren, not changing the position. But as the silence stretched, it became obvious that he was satisfied with the enigmatic answer he had others looked at him, then at each other, but didn't comment on that. Gaara let out a very non-discreet yawn.

'Tired baby?' Minato said gently, raising his legs a little higher to get the baby into an even straighter position that would hopefully discourage sleep.

The redhead looked out at him, then at the ceiling where the lazy bug flied around, hiding from the sun outside. If anything, he was bored, not sleepy. Minato wasn't very gifted when it came to reading baby moods, so he just smiled.

'Yeah, me too.' and he gave his nose a small poke, reaching for his necklace and making the hanging metal pieces jingle lightly as a peace offering.

If one followed the legends, Shukaku was the oldest tailed beast in terms of age. He wasn't sure how much truth there was to it, but his sensei had explained him how the seals they used nowadays were only as old the first practitioners of Ninshū were, given how they had adapted rawer, far more powerful seals into symbols and sutras they could use with more ease.

Safer, the Uzumakis would have called them. The new sealing style was at least two-hundred years old, and give or take a hundred years of that, that's how old the one-tail was supposed to be.

He didn't think this was the older sealing style- why, yes, this ofuda didn't look like something anyone would willingly use, but there were paths, there were supports to it. That was more modern, ancient sealing style was direct and probably would have taken more than one sacrifice to power something as big as Shukaku.

So this was either a) local, b) somewhere in between modern sealing and arcane one c) both.

All this meant Minato was just completely screwed, because he had spent as long as he had been awake in here (and he had been awake for many hours) trying to think of sealing methods and alternatives and something he could do to momentarily stun the demon enough to safely extract himself from the infant.

This was completely impossible unless he figured out what sort of sealing had been used on Gaara, and he hadn't seen or so much as felt the vaguest trace of a seal on the baby. He had checked as much as one could check when they stripped Gaara to change it, but there had been nothing, absolutely nothing save the markings on the baby's eyes, which was either the same weird stigmata thing that apparently happened when demon chakra was combined with unborn babies or direct result of lack of sleep.

Without a seal to analyze, he had no idea what sort of counter he could use to control it, and the Sunanin weren't just going to give them to him, no matter how prettily he asked. There was also the matter that if, as he suspected, they had used this more complicated version of sealing because it either worked better or (much more terrifyingly a supposition) was the only thing that worked because it was the only thing the method they had used to seal the bijuu responded to, whatever they used would have to be done in the same language.

And the worst part of it all- this weird happy language didn't work with the same alphabet used for standard sealing. In normal Uzumaki-style, Shukaku would have been composed of two solids and one composite for the 'ka'. In the patters of the corners, all composites gave him uneven numbers that didn't match with the needed pattern.

This wasn't a code he could deduce. This was another freaking language.

He gave a look at the still sand in the floor. Using a kunai, he wrote the Bijuu's name on it, standardized style. In an answer, the writing sank into the sand like if it was sucked in, and on it's place two black eyes opened, collecting golden orbs. They looked at him in silence and then moved toward the ANBU, who, at this point, looked like if they were about to keel over. Well, maybe two of them. Wern had simply closed his notepad and laid it nearby.

'Why are you trying to communicate with Ichibi?' he asked with the same dull tone he used since he came inside the building. One eye simply rose from the ground in a wiggly string of sand and blinked.

Minato gave a look at the little redhead. Little redhead was busy with trying to chew on his necklace. He turned to look at the sand.

'Just curious.'

That had gone so very well for him so far, so why the hell not? Worst case scenario he'd die a very measly, hopefully quick death and then he'd have to explain to his irate lover why their baby was now an orphan- no wait. That was never going to happen.

Kushina belonged to the Death God now.

_Name yourself_, he wrote in the sand.

It should have been an order, but given how he didn't have the composites to derive from the original seal, it was more like asking very nicely and seeing if the demon would feel like answering or even understand the question. In an answer, a very simplified drawing of what seemed to be a caricature of raccoon showed up, covered in strange swirls. If anything, it looked like a drawing from the era when people were still living in caves. Then it vanished, leaving swirls, and they alone moved into a writing.

_Monk._

'Liar.'

Minato frowned, writing the words also in kanji. It wasn't like if he had many options, the 'alphabet' for seals was only there to specify orders, it didn't actually translate or spell words, symbols meant orders, more than anything else. There was no real way to hold a very coherent conversation on it.

So the monster did understand modern speech. Which didn't really mean he would obey it. And he obviously could lie given how he had no way to be given authority.

_You were never human._

The black eyes shifted, then narrowed merrily, almost like if the creature was cunning something. It could also be simply laughing at him.

Suddenly, the chair fell over, as the sand emerged up, making a shape of a very old human, who pointed a finger at something and moved his lips. A moment later two meters away the old woman in the clothes of ancient priestess showed up, also moving her mouth. Then she suddenly got younger. And she also moved her mouth in the same pattern.

The words sank in the sand, leaving the word 'human' visible. The eyes blinked, looking at it.

_You human named me that__. You asked for my name, human._

Minato automatically curled on himself, not trusting the creepy figures around the baby even if deep down he knew it to be ridiculous. Why would the creature harm him?

'Oh?' he meant like, literally?

He always thought that it had been another legend, that of Shukaku having once been a very drunk and grudgy monk or something, not that humans had literally thought it to be and called him that.

For a moment he imagined the thing decades ago, as inhumanly bloodthirsty as any rabid animal and yet in possession of enough intelligence, enough sadism to assume a human form to get closer to it's prey, toy with it-

He'd been always been told he had too much imagination for his own good.

_How do you really write your NAME?_ he wrote, using the seal symbol for 'name' to specify.

The figures around them stared at him blankly, then the young woman opened her mouth and muttered in a rough, booming voice.

'I don't.'

And they both fell into the sand, becoming and being one with it.

Minato just snorted laughter at that, using the same kunai to draw a very simple figure on it.

Yeah, apparently asking 'pretty please' over here gave as good a result as everywhere else.

_( : P)_

'I hate this country.'

The sand didn't answer to that, simply blinking at the blond when the figure had sunk into the sand. It were words he didn't understand – they were too modern, too fresh. So, instead, he had repeated the pattern, making it show up on various spots of the room, including ceiling and floor.

The ANBUs looked at him wordlessly. Wren shot a kunai at the place where the eyes stared at them all. It didn't close, but he didn't hit it either – the hole showed up inside the eye leading to sand, pushing the orbs a little wider.

'Hokage-sama, please, end the communication.'

'ANBU person, please, stop calling me Hokage-sama. ' the blonde replied tiredly, but he did put the kunai back in his holder. There wasn't anything else of interest he had to discuss with a drunk and maddened raccoon, especially when it would lead him to absolutely nothing.

He looked down at the baby in his arms, frowning lightly.

'…did you catch any of that?'

The baby had only looked up at him, not bothered by the least. It seemed that the talk with Shukaku didn't affect it or at least – it's interest in any way.

'I'm Cactus Wren.' said Wren and moved back to his seat 'And no matter who you are now, your past will follow. You won't get away from it.'

'Ha.' Minato chuckled dryly at that. Like if he needed to be told there was a giant shackle wrapped around his neck that wouldn't doubt to squeeze whenever it felt appropriate.

He had scars to remind him of how stupid and useless he had been as a shinobi, and they weren't going to go away. He had people who had died for him, because of him, lives who had been at his disposal and he had been responsible for one way or another. He had his sensei (who had betrayed him), he had his village (who hated him), he had his student (who needed him and didn't have him anymore, and who might never forgive him for that).

He had (had had) a partner and a lover and another half. And she had placed the biggest, the heaviest the most terrible of all shackles on him.

'I might as well try.'

He was still here, wasn't he?


	5. Five

'What was his name again?'

'Gaara.' muttered Vulture, looking pretty much uninterested.

Minato now had the baby thrown over his forearm and was lightly patting his back. He had no idea how the baby could be comfortable in that position, but he seemed to like it just fine. Babies were just weird that way.

'That's a weird name.'

The ANBUs didn't speak up, only Wren kept on continuously writing on notepad, making quiet noise. The Kazekage who had at some point came down his office sat in the cushioned chair, drinking something that smelled of chamomile and kept on starring at the wall.

'His mother managed to name him, so it stayed.' he murmured. Not to mention that he found the name pretty suitable after awhile. Minato waited for a continuation of the answer, but it seemed it wasn't going to just come like that. So he stopped patting the baby's back to turn and look directly at the older man.

'… any particular reason she chose that or should I pick another uncomfortable question to ask?'

The man had only looked at him in silence and put the free hand down, taking a sip. 'Ask away' was the simple gesture.

'Let's say she wasn't in a very good mood then.'

Minato kept staring silently for a moment, but after a moment he gave the redhead an evil- if pretty tired smile.

'How old are you really?'

#+#+#+#+#+#

'I can't remember if I asked this out loud anymore, but- genjutsu?'

The people looked at him, but no one chose to answer this.

'Yeah, okay. Bad idea.' The baby in his arms hiccupped, a high, completely hilarious little noise that wasn't doing wonder for Minato's already severally diminished attention span.

'Bombing the sand?'

'What exactly are you trying to do again?' asked the Kazekage in more than please-get-the-good-idea-I'm-tired-of-idiocy tone of voice. The blonde made a vague flicker-of-the wrist gesture and sharply bent his neck to the side, earning a cringe-worthy crack out of it. The baby hiccupped again.

'I… can't honestly remember.' he said, slumping back into a relaxed position 'I assume it has something to do with your bijuu since it keeps popping up in the conversation.'

Then just to spite:

'Getting it real wet?'

'Sure, if you want to try, you can drop your pant and start masturbating on it. See how it goes.' said the redhead, looking like if he actually wouldn't mind seeing it. 'Don't count on my water though.'

Given how he had over forty-eight hours with literally no sleep on him, Minato found that suggestion a lot funnier than it really was.

'I think Konoha and Suna have some cultural differences on regards of what is masturbation-worthy material. You should try 'Icha-icha'.' he said between a not-exactly-mature fit of giggling 'But if your people find piles of sand arousing, I would expect happier people in this village.'

The baby hiccupped again. Minato had another fit of giggles.

'Kill it with fire?'

'I don't read modern porn, I make use of the old one.' muttered the Kazekage, watching the man and his fit of giggles with indifferent face. To tell the truth, he was fed up with situation. He had no problem with guests, guaranteeing that the guests occasionally LEFT. This one seemed to be sudden and eternal add to his household. 'And so do my people. Why don't you just drop him and go home? You look like you need it.'

'Maybe I really like your baby.' Minato said, pulling Gaara enough so he could give it a nuzzle 'Maybe last time I tried to do that it tried to cut me to shreds.'

Gaara closed his eyes and actually moved his arms, trying to get a better hold at Minato's arm. Daichi looked at it with fear, but since the man did it ten times already in his presence (if not more), he slowly started getting used to the idea that maybe Gaara liked that the blonde was doing that. Ridiculous.

'I told you to go away when the sand was still frozen.' muttered the redhead, then leaned back on the chair. 'Now you will have to try get used to the idea you might lose a limb.'

Minato didn't tell him that by the time they had broken him out of his comfy sand cocoon the sand was already back to sentience. Mostly because by now he couldn't remember it by now.

'Maybe if you told me what the scribbly-dotty things on the seals were I could come with something ten times better.' he cooed instead, holding Gaara's hands on his own and giving his forehead a little push.

'Ubuu…' was uttered from baby's lips as he kept his eyes closed, but clawed needily at the warm hands he was given. He liked that, even if he didn't respond properly. The Kazekage uttered a low ironic laugh.

'Scribbly-dotty, very funny.' he muttered, then clicked his fingers. ANBU were out of the room like if they weren't there on the first place. Then he sighed. This wasn't something he'd like to share with any of his villagers 'How tightly your mouth shut?'

'You mean if I'm going to rattle out this to the dozen of friends I have made so far?' he asked, still not looking at him. His arms wrapped around Gaara, giving him a light squeeze, his back tense. Even so, his voice remained good natured. 'Or maybe when I'm done with playing babysitter I can just take one of my usual daily strolls all the way to Rock or Water and be all 'Oh hey you guys, guess what I did today?''

'Your comedy does not amuse me.' muttered the redhead, entwining his fingers, the blenched gold shining weakly in the shadowed room. 'I don't have to tell you anything.'

The little redhead let out another content murmur and glued to Minato flatly. It was obvious that he was growing to like the man more and more. Soon, he'd probably eat him out of adoration.

'I'm glad you find my life to be comedic.'

The redhead had only looked at him for a few long seconds, and then, took out the crumpled piece of fresh seal. He was not going to dwell into that – tragedy was also not laying in his interest and the fact he had to play a role in one was more than enough.

'There are four corners in the seal card and thus, there are four additional incantation. This one' he pointed at the upper left corner 'says: 'lock it in, lock me out'. It's nothing more than exclusion.'

Minato passed the baby to his other arm, brushing messy blonde bangs off his face as he leaned to have a look.

'And the other two?'

'This one' muttered the kage, not really minding the baby as it gurgled something unintelligibly. 'Says: 'quiet.' he assumed it was to shut the voices the Second heard, but it was only speculation 'And the other two are complete nonsense. They mean…'

He turned the seal to himself and read out loud.

'I'm not mad, I don't want to dance, I will not eat, my existence is my cause.'

He didn't understand this one at all.

'I see.' the younger man said, nodding lightly. He leaned back the back rest lightly, frowning, only to shrug and relax after a moment.

'Sorry, none of these are good to me. This one-' and he pointed at the last one the redhead had mentioned. 'Is needed, but I'm not sure why- It has to be there, but it doesn't blend well with the others. There's something wrong with it.'

It was probably just a prototype, and experiment to see how it worked. Sometimes making a seal was like playing puzzles with a lot of pieces shaped the same way, you just had to try with them until you found one that fit in with the rest of the picture. What the redhead had said made some vague idea float up, but when he tried to grasp it, it disappeared into thin air. He was just too tired to manage a decent level of concentration.

'I'd need to know the rest of the alphabet and the seals to make something better. I'm sorry.'

'I can ask the wren to give you the alphabet, but don't ask for the seals. What was done here was done by the Second and Second only. He was a great seal master and could make up seals on the spot, all of which have worked, one way or another. There are no records of many of seals he did and those that are, mostly don't want to work.'

Needless to say, it seemed that the Second could have maybe some blood limit, but nobody heard of it. He suspected insufferable amounts of chakra, mixed with a mind that saw beyond obstacles that ninja world held on the fujin jutsus. Too bad that by the end of his life he destroyed everything he had achieved, fearing that someone might want to repeat what he did.

'Alphabet could help, but I'd still need the seals, working or not.' Minato said, looking back down when the baby gave his necklace a small tug. He'd need to have at least an idea of what the man was trying to do. If it was really all gone, he would have to figure out from scratch basic seals and orders to make. That would take research, studying, and possibly weeks until he was comfortable enough he could think of them at the same level of ease he had with the standard method he had learnt from his teacher and the specialized he had learnt from the Uzumaki's.

And an attention span that wasn't quite so inclined towards pretty colors and bright lights. And heat.

'Not to mention the initial one.' he added, but this last was muttered under his breath. Good luck getting that one. If anything, he was surprised the redhead seemed willing to let him learn something that looked this …exclusive.

'I will see what can I do.' Though, of course, Daichi wouldn't do much. The man was his prisoner for the time being, that was for sure – he was being banished from his village and degraded from his stool to his soldier, but that didn't mean that Konoha one day wouldn't forgive him. If they wanted to get rid of him, they'd mark his as a missing nin and kick him out of gates with an hour before they'd let the hunting dogs go. He didn't think the man could do much. Of course, he heard he married an Uzumaki – the inheritor of a clan who could seal many things, but he didn't really believe in his good intentions. He was a foreigner who was once his enemy, just as all villages turned their back on him at some point.

He would have to be stupid to give him mark for sealing one's soul or the seal of blocking senses. But probably seals for growing foreign grass or flowers on dead grounds wouldn't hurt. In the end, if he had learned something he shouldn't have, they could seal his memory. This seal was surely old and surely working.

'The initial one is one of the major basic commands only desperate and foolish would use.'

''Posses me, I'm delicious'?' the blonde asked blandly. No, he wasn't getting those seals, which was a pity because he really liked researching seals and coming with new formulas. Who knows what could have come from a bit of mixing with these weird scribbly-dotty things and some of the ones from his in-law's.

'Maybe I could just run away real fast?' he asked humorously

'How fast is fast?' asked the man. 'The sand is everywhere. It will get you.'

'How far goes its attention span without visual feedback from the host?' the blonde asked laconically. 'I can outrun it. Probably.'

'It all lies in what host wants.' muttered the redhead, hiding the seal inside his sleeve again 'If he wants to get you, it will chase you until Gaara gets distracted or bored.'

'Then let's hope one year old attention's span doesn't last too long, right?'

And also hope he didn't get caught before he had a chance to do it, given how the first two or three seconds he'd only be average speed before he really gained enough momentum to go as fast as he needed. And that he didn't trip on his own feet or simply decide it simply wasn't worth the effort and play sitting duck for the monster. Then again, did 'killed by baby' really sound that bad?

'Can you do the same things with chakra Thorny Devil could or do you need to call her back?' he asked, finally getting up. His ass felt weird after sitting down for so long on what was left of the couch. The room also decided to make a rather rude halfback tango dip on him when he did, and he caught the baby more firmly as he steadied himself on the wall.

'Thorny Devil learned the ability of spider puppet on her own, I don't specialize in this.' said the man and clicked his fingers. All three of ANBUs were back in place again. 'Wren, give the second ancient letters alphabet to Namikaze Minato-san. I will distribute the seals. She is all yours.'

And with that he left to his office again. Thorny Devil looked at Wren, who also looked back as the Vulture let out a rather loud whistle.

'I think he meant your abilities and not me but Hokage-sama.' muttered the Wren and cleared his throat as he started searching through his notes. Vulture started laughing.

'Stop that!' hissed the female ANBU after a moment as the other man seemed to be just too humoured by the situation.

'But I'm not doing anything!' said the man, but quieted down as the floor below him glinted with blue.

'On your orders.' muttered the girl and bowed down.

'Oh, you temptress.' the blonde said, smiling lightly. 'I'll tell Lark how you tried to sway me with your feminine wiles.'

Did he really want to do this?

'I need the baby to be caught- with as little rattling as possible. I don't care if the sand does it first, just don't get him rattled. Then I'll just run and hope not to get if I do get caught- feel free to tell Lord and Master he has my blessings to give my son to a real family and keep charging my village for the privilege of my stay.'

'Understood.' said the woman 'I will do that for sure.'

'You'd better survive. It would get boring if you didn't.' said Vulture, but quieted up as the stepping of feet came down the stairs.

'Here are your seals.' said the Kazekage, giving him a dusty scroll. 'Don't lose any or I'm having your head.'

Minato looked at the older man, pausing o his search for the most appropriate spot to put his plan in motion. The man still wanted him to look at those? He didn't really need them for this plan -if what he was going to do could even classify as one.

'You still want me to-' he stopped, looking at the scroll. A slow smile appeared on his lips, probably the first genuine one he gave the Kazekage. 'Well; now this would be work by request.' he said, quickly storing the scroll in one of the numerous pockets in his person 'I warn you, I'm expensive.'

'No, you only think you are.' said the Kazekage, giving him not a very amused smile. The man was more than forgettable, considering that he was on much lower level than in the past. 'And I don't pay for missions for the things that doesn't happen.'

Minato's eyes just narrowed a little, but the smile didn't diminish.

'Did no one ever tell you it's bad form to be cheap with a seal master?' but he wasn't angry. If anything, for the first time in half a year he had something to look forward to. A challenge. Good way to get Leafnin's attention.

'We'll see what happens. See that the other seals get to me.'

The other man held his face also. He knew what would happen. The man would try, once, twice, then he would succumb to his bed, out of fear or need or something, he didn't want to know – and then he'd quit and go back to being a goose laying golden eggs. And that was fine. He was used to this way of living.

'All I know that exchanging promises with man who is about to die is futile.' he said and looked at Gaara. The baby, oblivious to everything, sucked on its thumb quietly.

Minato only shook his head- he still was getting a whole new array for sealing styles. Even if he didn't have the original seal, something could come out of it. He looked back down at the baby, feeling an irrational pang of guilt. He was a relaxed little weight sprawled against his chest, nothing to do with the tense figure he had picked from the stone cradle almost three days ago. Obviously the last thing he expected was to be just thrown away. He leaned on him with that typical and completely undeserved trust small children had reserved for adults- it didn't matter if they were yours or not. You were there. They trusted you to protect them.

Even small babies whose soul were being eaten by a carnivorous monsters.

It was terrifying. And it was the last thing he wanted to do, but he didn't have any other option. He didn't want to go back out, back to being responsible for his own son, for his happiness, for fixing his life or ruining it, but he didn't have another option.

'I'm sorry.'

He made sure no one was in the immediate path- made sure they would have ample room to escape if the sand went at everything on sight- then he grabbed the baby under the arms as if he were doing nothing more than changing positions.

Only this time, as soon as he had him off, he pushed him away from his body and _ran._

And at first, nothing had happened. Completely nothing – when the man vanished, the baby safely landed in a net of chakra strings, making a surprised squeak and then starring up at the ceiling. Daichi even managed to take him in his own hands and make two steps toward the child's bedroom without anything on his path – the baby was that shocked. And then – it happened.

The ground shook. Literally. It was like an earthquake – the walls moved and sand fell from all of them, making the house wave dangerously. The other kids and Yashamaru immediately ran out of their rooms, looking at what was happening on the lowest floor.

'Get out by the ceiling!' shouted the Kazekage. It was all he managed to say, because a second later the baby uttered a loud wail, followed by a bone wrecking roar – the face of the monster showed on the wall and vanished. And then – the floor broke in two.

Daichi didn't know why or what was going to happen outside the house – he didn't and couldn't care. He just jumped up to the stairs, secured by the sound wave as the sand suddenly tried to land on his head and ran up, as fast as he could.

Gaara's room was reeking of ofudas and seals. It was the only place he could drop him safe.

Outside, the cracked earth followed. The plain roads suddenly turned into trippy broken ground and one big hole followed into one direction – the smell of the Hokage. He was fast and ran far – but it could catch up with him, it surely could. Some civilians fell into the hole, breaking their heads and necks, smelling well and fulfilling – but as for now, Shukaku didn't bother. He just chased what Gaara wanted – the blonde man meat.

And when he spotted him, it smiled.

Minato could feel the sun beating over his head- it was amazing, he had only been outside less than twenty seconds and he already could feel the heat through his hair. It was trying to cook his brain. Sweat ran freely down his back, getting into the stitched slices in his back in bright burning paths of pain.

His muscles complained for the sudden forced activity without any sort of previous warm-up and after such a period of inactivity, but he could deal with that. Muscle pain wasn't new to him. And neither was the wave of wild, raw chakra commanding the sand to chase him, devouring everything in its path. For a moment, he wondered who was the crazed masked man directing it this time, but then the panic receded and he forced himself to think like the soldier, like the leader he was supposed to be.

He had to get out of its sight, out of its range of attack. He had to get out of the way of civilians. And he had to do it now. With a flicker of his wrist, the pronged kunai was on his hand. He put it on his mouth and held it with teeth, his hands quickly assuming the seals.

A puff of smoke later, there were three of them, all running in different directions, even faster than before.

It was a good idea, but not good enough – the hole had also divided, chasing all of the clones and original, changing street into one big map of holes. The people screamed when the earth suddenly jumped up and caught the false Minato by foot, making him dispel. The same happened when the other clone went down after tripping and getting squished by a hole that closed over it. Shukaku was not playing into mediocre plays. He hunted for real.

But when all clones dispelled, the whole power was back to the last persona, running through the hills of deep desert, trying to get away from the town. It was even better now – he was running into lose sands, so he didn't even have to accumulate the material. As soon as he stepped upon the sandy dune, the sand shot up, catching his hands and trying to pull him down.

And when he almost buried him in the sand cocoon, ready to squeeze just to be sure he wouldn't escape

(-utsu!)

Daichi closed the door and ended the last incantation of every possible seal he could think of in the centered room. The sand froze and fell to the ground, limp and useless.

That was it.

Gaara was crying like hell, but the sand just changed into dust, useless and defenseless, not even trying to make a cradle. Gaara lied on the floor.

'Serves you right.' muttered the redhead and slowly, very slowly, slower than an old grandpa he exited the room. Then he noticed crack on the wall and collapsed.

Trying to work on a sand that escaped the house was a little too much, even on him.

#+#+#+#+#+#

Crawling out of rubble was nothing new for him. But sand wasn't rubble. Rubble only got a little but under your clothes if you weren't careful with your movement. Sand got under tour clothes no matter what you did, and liked to stick to your sweat. It also liked to crawl under your bandages. The desert was alive, and hated him, and there was nothing Minato could be told that would chance this certainty.

And he hated it back.

He saw his house before he heard the baby's wail, and that was because Naruto only seemed to start crying as soon as he was by the door. Off handedly, dream-like, he wondered if he could smell it on him.

Choking, choking. Poisoned, evil chakra.

'Hello.' he whispered to the woman trying to shush his baby, his voice inaudible under his baby's cries. He wanted to rip him off her hands and kill her for touching him at all. He wanted to hurt her for having been there when he hadn't been and distractedly thought she was small enough disposing of her body wouldn't be too hard. Who would know?

'Thank you for taking care of Naruto.' he heard himself say, somewhere in some galaxy away. A galaxy with many, many suns. All inches from the planet. He could feel it even through the roof. A giant playing with a magnifying glass.

Maki had immediately put the baby down, hearing that finally someone came. She was not that good with kids and this one was one of those worst. He just couldn't calm down, and when she finally discovered why, she couldn't really help him. Sure, she gave him some licorice and a piece of old bread to gnaw at, but it didn't help or last for long. And now, the man was here.

'That's nothing!' she said, getting up 'But I'm so glad you're here, Hokage-sama. I made a pot of tea and milk, it's still warm. Also, changed his diaper not long ago. I give him back to you then.'

And with that, she bowed down, obviously waiting for additional orders or a simple dismissal.

Minato didn't answer right away, instead just took the baby in his arms and wrapped himself around him, both arms holding him lightly as he rested a cheek over the sunny hair.

'…'

Naruto didn't calm down, but he not only allowed his father to take him in his arms- which Maki couldn't seem to manage without the baby twisting into impossible shapes to get away from her- but clung to him fiercely, his face burying on the sweaty shirt and rubbing. There was another louder, somehow complain-like wail, and then the baby's cries started losing that wild edge they constantly seemed to have and lessened on volume to something more bearable.

'Ah… well… is there anything else I can do?' finally the girl decided to ask, as it seemed the man was not going to give her the answer.

'Excuse me...?' the blonde finally broke eye contact with the far off wall, turning to look at her as if he wasn't very sure what was she doing there or in what language she was speaking.

'Is there anything you need for me to do?' asked the girl again, patient. It seemed the man went through something difficult and wasn't in touch with reality much. She didn't sense genjutsu around him though.

_Don't let the craters outside eat you_, he thought dazedly, but this was just stupid. The woman was a kunoichi, she could dodge. Probably.

'No, thank you. Again. I'm sorry for having imposed on you like this.'

'That's no problem at all.' said Maki bowing again. 'I'll take my leave then. Have a good day!'

And with that, she poofed out.

Minato stood for one moment longer, looking at the empty space she had been occupying for an indeterminate span of seconds, then slowly moved to the kettle and served himself the tea. He elatedly realized he had no idea if the girl that normally came to take care of Naruto while he was off running around and delivering paperwork was going to come back, but by this point it didn't matter.

His stomach made a vague complaining noise, but even knowing he hadn't had anything since the meat bun the ANBU had forced him eat wasn't enough to make him worry about food. The heat made him feel sick all the time. Naruto also wasn't in any sort of mood for anything that didn't involve clutching at him and crying for attention or complaining for lack of it, so he just sat on the kitchen and drank the thing down in small sips until it was all gone.

Then he decided that if he didn't go to sleep he was going to go brilliantly mad in the next fifteen minutes, but there was also the drug still in his system, making him feel just as tired and just as impossibilited from actually falling asleep as before. There was only one solution to this.

He didn't like taking laudanum, but with how little he had eaten and the unknown dosage used on the pill he'd been made to swallow he was just as likely to end up poisoning himself with Belladonna or whatever the hell he tried to take instead. And if he was going to poison himself, he'd rather take something that he knew for a fact would knock him out good. He swallowed two sips from the concentrated bitter substance and chased it down with some honeyed candy he kept among his things, then walked downstairs to the cellar and his bed, taking Naruto with him.

It wasn't very smart or safe, but if there was something he could count on, that was his son waking him up if he accidentally rolled on top of him. Lung power wasn't anything Uzumaki Naruto was lacking on, and the only thing that remotely seemed to work on settling the baby was keeping him as close as possible. It was while he removed his shirt that he started thinking that maybe he wouldn't really notice, no matter how loud he got because of what he had taken. And he didn't think he could make it back up and to the horrible heat, much less go find an available babysitter.

Instead, he sat in bed for a few moments to gather strength, then slit his finger with one of the Kunai hidden among his bed.

The baby stopped momentarily from its relentless crying at the sight of the poof of smoke when a brown toad roughly the size of a large football appeared in place, a Buddhist bracelet wrapped on the area below his mouth and above his shoulders- what in any other animal might have been a neck, so it was probably meant as a necklace, then mewled uneasily, little fists waving in stress. Minato shushed him distractedly.

'It's okay Naru, it's just family to visit.'

The toad opened his mouth to say something, took a look at Minato and closed it.

'…you look like crap, brat.' it said after a few moments of consideration.

'How appropriate, I feel like crap,' the blonde replied, carefully pulling off the net shirt and hissing when some links caught on the fresh stitches and sand. 'Hello, Gamakijou.'

'What the hell happened to you?'

'Shukaku, all bundled up in the cutest little redhead you'd imagine.' Minato laughed quietly, stopping with an annoyed hiss when it just made his back hurt even worse than before. 'It's like the universe knows I can't say no to them and just shuffles them my way, you know? _'Go on, take it, isn't it cute? Don't you want it? it's okay, it won't bite- No, really you can keep it, I insist._'

If the Toad's worried expression and slightly agape mouth was any clue on how little sense he was making, Minato missed it completely.

'*The* Shukaku?'

'I need to sleep.' Minato said, not seeming to have so much a registered the question.'I just took some laudanum, so please make sure I don't squish Naruto on my sleep?'

The desert toad frowned even more.

'I hate to break it to you, but if you faint, I'm poofing right back home.'

'Oh yeah…' the blonde said, blinking dazedly. 'I forgot.'

He stared at the summon for a moment or two, then bent down and grabbed it, pulling it to his lap (it croaked indignantly, not that Minato paid much notice), but still didn't struggle as hard as it could have, not when Minato grunted in pain at the first attempt to jump back off. It took some time, and it was kind of hard to concentrate with the way his eyes kept trying to close themselves, but after a few minutes he had an intricate array drawn on the toad's back.

'There, stranded.' he said, satisfied with his handiwork. The toad tried to look over its shoulder, which went as well as it could go with a creature lacking a neck and no shoulders to speak of.

'…and this washes with water?'

Minato looked down at the marker in his hand. It said 'permanent'. So he made some vague not really answering noise in the back of his throat and pushed the pen away.

'Gamakijou-san, this is Naruto. Naru, this is Gamakijou-san.' he said, making some sort of introductory gesture between the two. Naruto stared at the toad for all of three seconds before going right back to wailing.

'I don't think he likes me.' The toad noted, jumping closer into the bed, but not actually touching the baby.

'He's just fussy,' Minato said, also crawling to the center of the bed and lying on his stomach, pushing his sweaty face into the pillow. 'He's teething.'

'You mammals and your bizarre growth spurs-' the toad noted with a shudder. 'You'll never see one of us have to go through these strange development phases of yours!'

If he had been any more coherent, Minato might have laughed from the well known speech, but all he managed was some soft agreeing sound and obedient nodding in hopes it would settle the conversation.

'…your back looks like you spent some time in a torture session,' the toad noted. 'Is Suna mistreating you?'

Explaining exactly what had happened would require entirely too many big words in too long sentences .

'Awesome,' he said instead, his words a sleepy slur. 'Suna's just awesome. Kazekage invited me for a sleepover and everything. It was great.'

And he fell asleep.

At Sabaku household, however, the nightmare was just at the beginning. Sure, Daichi had finally managed to get Gaara into his room. Sure, he had lost his two fingers in the process and only by pure luck managed to catch them to have them reattached, or he would have to suit himself with wooden fingers. Sure, when the seals had finally worked (with him channeling chakra through the sensory ANBU as his lacking hands couldn't get proper seals and he could only count on others) and Gaara got held on tight strings. Sure, the devastated house went silent.

For another three hours.

Then, as the workers were trying to cover the holes with additive sand, the holes in the ground had suddenly clamped down, swallowing everyone who didn't managed to jump out from them in a mere second. And then the ground began to shake.

It wasn't an earthquake and it wasn't a massive shake at all – and yet, every house in the village had just moved, making the sand fall from the roofs, walls, dusted frames. The paintings waved like in the middle of a sea storm and from time to time they fell on the floor. The dull, deafened roar burst out from the center of the ground and kept on howling in distress, in pain, in anger. The bones of recently killed moved under the grounds and from time to time they lurked out, coloring the sands red, rusty, black.

The sand deity was angry and the little host no better. Everyone hid in the buildings and only on the highest points above earth the sensory types of ANBU stood and kept on channeling chakra. The Fourth was along them, standing on the top of the Kage building, holding mudras of calamity and trickster. Soon, the dark sky turned brown and the sandstorm came. And no ninja could be seen outside.

When the morning came, no sun could be seen outside. Only the dark murky light and the hot suffocating heat hurled through the empty streets, the dull growl still hearable, the bones of half eaten people rattling through the streets.

At least the buildings stopped moving along with the grounds.

Three ninjas died this night trying to keep the stressed toddler awake. It was good considering that the Shukaku was on the verge of the catastrophe, ready to cover the whole village under the massive sand dune. Daichi looked at the ceiling, his reattached fingers stinging and cramping, his arms numb and paralyzed. He didn't know if the barrier was working and how far it was stretching, but he hoped the storm didn't cover the closest source of water. He tried to concentrate on the spot to add to the strength, but since he was the pillar of the barrier, everyone borrowed from him, so his energy spread everywhere. He didn't know where it went anymore. He prayed.

Minato slept through most of it, and when he couldn't sleep another minute, he slept some more.

Every now and then he'd come back to some basic level of sentience for different reasons; hearing Naruto cry, something in the upper level fall (he didn't feel any presence, so he kept sleeping right through it), the wind howling (screaming?) outside.

At one point he woke enough to protest at something being incredibly annoying on his back, but then he felt the humid, pudgy body on top of it and the sand toad telling him to can it and stay still, and he grumbled something incoherent but hopefully appropriately protesting in return. He stayed awake long enough to reach and stroke one plump cheek from the baby dozing next to him and wince at one particularly rough digging into the fresh wound to get the sand out, and then he was out again.

The next time he woke up, his wounds were stinging dully and they had a fresh bandage covering it. Also, the toad was smoking.

'Please do that somewhere else. No tobacco near the baby.' he said. Or he thought he said, because he thought he sounded like if his gums had been replaced by rows of cotton. His breath still smelled strongly of laudanum.

'Good luck opening a window.' the toad said, shrugging it's not-shoulder and quickly starting to climb the stairs. 'There's a sandstorm going on.'

It took several moments for Minato to feel stable enough to get up without smacking into things, his feet not quite responding, nothing unusual when he just woke up. He had another candy and waited for the sugar to take effect before trying again. He had no idea how long he had been out, and the drug had shot his internal clock somewhere out to hell. And when he finally left the bathroom, natural light didn't help at all. What little could be seen outside was a world entirely composed of howling browns and reds and blacks.

The bloodlust in the air was choking.

Slowly, he sat down on a chair, looking outside. When he couldn't resist it any longer, he doubled over, hands on his face and his longish hair covering his features. How many people had died yesterday as he ran out? How many people had died while he slept like a drunken sloth?

'…I did this.' he said, between his fingers, his voice so low, so very, very loud against the howling wind outside. The toad gave him a look, frowning at the reaction. Jiraiya's student had been deported to Suna or something like that, the specifics being something strictly of Konoha's affair. Other than having the desert-bred side of the family shifting to fill in the gap the tropical side would leave -as they wouldn't be able to survive in these crazy temperatures, no one knew any of the specifics. And of course, neither Jiraiya nor his brat were inclined to share.

Still, he doubted the white-haired pervert knew his student was being harassed by a demon of the sand.

'What you said about Shukaku…' The toad said, taking a deep breath of its pipe. Minato didn't answer or acknowledge his words, still doubled over himself like a sad child. 'Minato. You can't stay here if this is so dangerous-' it said, jumping closer. 'You have a baby to think of-'

At that the human looked up sharply, eyes wide and such a limpid shade of blue they looked almost unreal in his pale face. He wasn't crying. Gamakijou had been sure he had been.

The blonde didn't say anything, just stared at him like if the toad had gone against him when he least expected it too. Slowly, he looked down at his hands. There was a nasty bite on one, like if he'd purposely tried to stick it down a barracuda's throat.

'Brat?'

Minato again didn't answer, but his other hand felt around his discarded vest in the scroll pockets. After fiddling through them, he took one and opened it, giving it a look.

'I need fresh scrolls and some ink made.' Minato said, standing back up, legs none too certain.

'I think you should go back to bed.' the toad informed him. He hadn't noticed before downstairs without a proper source of light, but even in the dim darkness, Minato looked awful. Like if he hadn't been sleeping or eating for days and then something chased him to the end of earth and tried to swallow him whole.

'I also need brushes.' the blonde continued as if he hadn't heard him, walking to a cabinet to get several fresh scrolls.

'What for? You have a marker, I saw you use it. That's easier than making ink in this heat.'

'You don't use markers for seals.' the blonde answered petulantly, 'A true master only works with brushes.' And he was so every inch Jiraiya's student when he did so the frog couldn't help smiling.

'All right, brat.' It said, blowing up some smoke before moving away to get the instructed materials 'Let's see what mess can you get yourself into this time.'

Minato gave the amphibian a thankful smile, then pulled out of his pocket the copy he had made of the original seal. Lock it in, lock me out, quiet and some mad gibberish, plus an alphabet and absolutely no instructions. Let's see what he could do with this.


	6. 6

'Baki.' The intercom cracked with static. 'Namikaze Minato here, over.'

For a long steady moment only the sound of statistic could be heard, along the cracks. The sun blinked briefly through the dark brown clouds and hid again. The radio cracked.

'ANBU squad presenting himself, vulture is gawking at the prey. The dog cannot bark, the shepherd needs him. Over.'

Why were they speaking in code? Did they really think anyone would mind if they just said 'Baki's busy, can I take a message for you?' Did they honestly think someone was out on this weather spying on them?

'Vulture.' he repeated 'Awesome- listen, I need Cactus Wren with me right now. I can meet him either at the debriefing office, one of the towers or Kazekage-sama's house, over.'

'If you want an egg, come to the nest.' said the other voice. The communicator cracked, sending the beginning of the next sentence, but then something big had cracked and the mash of panicked voices started shouting in the background. Three seconds later, the receiver went dead – probably because Vulture had turned it off, possibly – because the other receiver stopped existing.

Minato stared at the communicator in his hands and rolled his eyes- of course. Nothing could ever be easy, could it? He ran his hands over his forehead, pushing away sweaty bang and leaving a line of ink on the pale skin.

'I'm leaving,' he told the toad, pushing the scrolls back into his jounin vest, then turning to stare at the massive one. After a moment hesitation he drew with the marker a carrying seal on his hand and stored it in it. Something that size would only slow him down right now. 'Take care of Naruto.'

'Make sure to come back in one piece.' The toad said, crossing it's thin, slimy arms across his chest. 'If you don't come back, I'm smoking next to your baby.'

Minato shook his head, a quick, slightly forced smile in his lips as he stared down at Naruto. He was chewing on some old bread, and looking up at him in curiosity. He cooed something when he rubbed at the slight marks on one chubby cheek.

'Stay safe, baby.' he murmured, reaching up to his necklace and starting to search for the lock, before stopping. Like hell he was leaving his necklace behind. He was coming back. No questions asked.

'I mean it, Minato.' the toad said, moving in front of the ma even as the other searched for the right kunai to get him to the office. 'If you don't come back, I'm feeding him flies. And ants! They are quite tasty in this region!'

Apparently the change of Cartesian line hadn't done wonders for Minato's manners, because he still ignored him and just disappeared in a small puff. He'd have to talk to Jiraiya on regards of that.

He turned to the baby- only to find it had rolled onto his stomach and somehow soldier-crawled the half a meter that separated them. How old was this thing again? How the hell was he even doing that?

As all answer, Naruto shifted his eyes from the place his father had occupied a moment ago to give the toad a very serious baby look. Then his bottom lip started quivering.

'Oh, brother-'

'WAAAaaah~!'

#+#+#+#+#+#

The room Minato had placed the hirashin seal in was on one of the highest, less used floors. It wasn't very nice when he appeared on it only to have the wind nearly throw him off his feet. Several of the windows were broken, apparently before anyone thought of (or had time) to barricade against it. The sand slapped at his face and he had to pretty much navigate from memory to the first door that would take him to the aisles. And he'd thought Sunanin to be insane to be putting doors on every single room of theirs. He was infinitely glad when he'd managed to close them behind him. Now he just needed to find which floor the ANBU were currently holed in. He just hoped the others had closed windows.

Surely, they had. Just after he made the first step, the unknown ANBU had appeared, wrapped in bandages from head to toe and put a kunai right to his testicles.

'Class, rank, password.' he muttered and stilled.

And he didn't look like if sand got to him at all.

Minato briefly considered breaking his nose out of pure principle, but he didn't really have time to engage in petty fights today. Maybe tomorrow he'd make up for it at the office with one of Baki's underlings. The tall one with the scar on the side of his face looked like he could use a new rhinoplasty.

'Yondaime Hokage. Get out of the way. I need to talk with Cactus Wren.' If everyone in this country kept pulling up his rank for him when he didn't want it, he might as well use it room wavered slowly and the man suddenly vanished, leaving him in-between the half opened door, the sand still falling behind him in wild turns.

'Hokage-sama, please, close the door.' said the man on the end of the hallways 'And come here.'

Minato gave them a light wave with the hand and closed the door behind him, trying not to think if he would ever be able to feel the grains sticking to his skull.

'I need a room alone with Cactus Wren.' He was starting to feel like a broken record, pulling his scarf out of the way and carelessly dropping it by the door. 'Fresh ink, brushes, and the biggest scroll you can find. At the very least the base of the first floor at the Kazekage's tower'

'I'm sorry, the biggest rooms are outside and this wouldn't be smart for you to go out now.' Muttered some unknown ninja in a dingo's mask. 'The Cactus Wren is waiting for you in the nearby room, along with utensils. It's his job to hold on such things.'

Minato felt like complaining. A lot. But that would be wasting precious time.

'Great. Stay here and, you know- don't get killed.' he said, passing the man and entering the room. He hoped at least wouldn't be crawling with packed furniture. What greeted him, however, was a wall of scrolls. Nicely, neatly put back and dusted out, but still – wall of scrolls. Along with papers, inks and stamps, all behind the colorful glass. In the middle of very cramped room sat the Cactus Wren and as usual – kept on scribbling in his notepad.

'Good afternoon, Hokage-sama.' he muttered in his bored tone of voice. 'How can I help you?'

'Afternoon, huh,' the blonde said, staring for a moment, before reaching for his pocket.'I need help with these. I need you to proofread this.' he tossed him a scroll from his vest. 'And this, and this-' another pair, then bit his hand and summoned the largest tome, pushing it on the floor and giving it a good kick that opened it all the way until the wall. A little less than half of it remained closed out of lack of room to expand. 'And this. If you can think how to shorten any of these, be my guest. Also, I need Shukaku's name in scribbly-dottesse language. And when you are done I'll need help making it into an even bigger scroll. I tried making it smaller, but I don't know how and I don't have time to learn.'

Wren stopped for a moment with the scribbling to look at the floor.

'From what I see, you already made one hundred sixty eight mistakes.' he muttered, then started scribbling again. 'Also, I do not know scribbly-dottesque language. I know how the 'monk' is written in old Sunalan though.'

'You math skills awe me, they do;' the blonde said, walking to the water dispenser and taking a long gulp from a cup. 'Give me the name and correct what you can. We'll see how to balance it when you are done. It's still too big to be of any use right now.'

When he'd first sat down and started working on the formations needed, Minato had been working with normal scrolls. The problem was that he really didn't know much about these sealing method. At the lack of anything to do he had started to break down the formulas he did have, both the ones in the ofuda he had been shown and the ones he knew about. Several of the connectors were similar enough they could (and hopefully would) work with minimal adjustments. It had taken him most of the day/night/afternoon to manage to detach the basic negative and positive arrangements.

Luckily the added gibberish was literally crawling with cease orders. It was easy to break down the main symbol for a negative, and generally the positives were the exact same down formulas, however, was something that required space. Two seals, depending on how many composites they were made off, could easily span half a dozen scrolls. Over a dozen, if they were actually made out of polysigils.

It made easier for students to understand how sealing worked, and it also made easier for people learning to understand what the main order was. It also was very long and incredibly tiring a process. And the paper was getting more and more cramped. So by the third time he started scribbling on the table, Minato had called quits and started working on the biggest scroll he owned. And it was still pretty packed.

'Stop' was an aggressive order in seal language. It commanded the chakra to remain still and contained in place, which explained why it sapped the Kazekage's chakra the way it had – the more chakra to retain, the bigger the cost. It also explained why it solidified into something akin to metal.

It was a short range command, roughly the immediate area where the ofuda was cast.

There was no way to make it bigger without people dying quickly out of chakra depletion. Something as big as Shukaku? Dozens of sacrifices, likely.

'Cease' was a passive order. It caused the chakra to dispel itself. If he added two communal negatives to bridge it and managed to figure out 'Return', it could work. 'Return' was an active, but it worked far more easily than stop on the bias that it only needed to change the rout of chakra and then it was a matter of letting the initial course direct the flow of it. 'Lay' and 'Still' were tricky. 'Lay' was also a passive, but without the added 'Still', nothing stopped the creature from starting right back.

And 'Quiet'… If he could only figure out the symbol for it in the sense of calming down instead of silence.

At some point the wren stopped writing in his notepad and started rechecking the writings, but didn't help much. He just provided as a dictionary and a spellchecker.

'I don't take prizes nor punishment for not my work.' he stated simply as he added the missing dot on one of the signs. 'And 'be quiet' is written in such signs: **الرجاء****أن****تكون****هادئة****. **I can't help with the rest.'

The man had barely finished the sentence before Minato threw the paper cup at his head, where it bounced off harmlessly. The epic story of lightweight plastic vs. hardened marble masks.

'Look, if this works you can take all the glory and if it sucks you can blame it on me, but I did what I could with what I had. I need help.' he said, leaning closer on the table-only he wasn't leaning as much as holding himself up against it. 'And if you can't, I need someone who can. Someone who isn't dead or crazy, preferably. And, if you can't provide that-' he said, pausing to take a breath after such a sentence. 'I need the rest of the seals. Anything you might have, even the crazy talk.'

He could take a look at what the other had corrected and try to figure out to what to do, but – 168 errors, and just on the first scroll? He didn't have time to think about all of them.

'And by the way, 'be quiet' is no use to me right now. I need it to lay still, not silent. He can bitch as much as it wants for all I care.'

Wren had simply took the ball of paper and threw it back at him.

'Freeze.' he said with as much irony as he could. In the end, he lived on a desert. Minato made an affronted noise and swatted at the thing.

'Not in that way, I need it to calm down! 'Quiet', you know, 'quiet?'' and he drew the symbol with his finger on the table, standard style.

'Yeah, quiet. Shshsh.' muttered Wren and copied Minato's finger with perfect precision. 'Be silent. Stop talking. Shut up. No words. No talk. Become quiescent. Remain noiseless. Tacit you shall be and tacit you shall remain. Is that what you want?'

For a moment Minato started to breathe faster- actually, for a second, he looked like if he was on the edge of hyperventilating. Then it stopped, out of nowhere. He took a deep breath, and when he spoke again, his voice could have been used to sweeten any cup of coffee in the world.

'Why, no. No. I don't mean that sort of quiet. At all.' He smiled. 'I mean 'Quiet' as in 'sit still'. As in 'you are grounded, don't move' kind of way. As in'stop trying to attack things', as in 'refrain from further murder of anything in your path. You know? 'Quiet?' That 'Quiet.'? Yes, that 'Quiet'.'

Wren looked at him blankly.

'Freeze.'

'Freeze' is an active command. It sucks too much chakra and it won't do anything once it runs out of chakra. I need it to stay calm for long enough it forgets it was upset. Bijuu have a limited attention span.'

Being made of concentrated angry chakra made that to one, he supposed. Especially Shukaku.

Wren once again looked back in blank expression.

'Let's talk.' he stated with the same tone. If there was anything that grabbed Shukaku's attention it was a listener and a talker he could gamble into being devoured by sand.

'Are we still talking sal commands, or you trying to get fresh with me?' the blonde asked, eyebrows raised in a dry expression.

'Your fly Is open.' Said the other man with a calm tone as he moved forward just as uselessly as suggestively 'Seals. That's what are we talking about.'

And with that, he moved back to the previous position.

'Projecting your wishes onto me won't make them true.' the blonde said calmly, still leaning most of his weight on the table. 'Sad life. Talking is hard to translate, and would require someone to actually do sit and talk to it. Given how enthusiastic you were of it at the house, I don't see how can this help now.'

Wren didn't seem to be inclined into either nodding or disagreeing. He simply looked down at the seals.

'I don't know, Hokage-sama.'

The blonde stared back at him with a strange expression- disbelief, mostly or at least that's what it was at the beginning. Then it almost shifted to something that could have been called hurt on any other person, before shutting off completely when he tilted his head down, hair covering almost all of it.

What the hell was wrong with this people? There was flesh eating sand outside

(and it might be all his fault, his fault-)

((no it wasn't, he hadn't asked for it, he hadn't put the demon in a defenseless baby-))

(((only he did, he did, and he had, and he was paying, paying, paying for it)))

and they were just standing around like sitting ducks, like if having faces made entirely of teeth appear off on the ground and gobble people whole was what was destinied to happen in their life.

He didn't understand these people. He didn't think he ever would- they were just too different.

This was something he had noticed before in the way they worked. They were quick, and they were efficient and one couldn't really complain, but all what they did was so perfectly defined and there never seemed to be any life to it- people worked, and they only went as far as their work told them to go, and that was it. They didn't even try, like if the sun had sucked them out of all spirit and will whatever fight they had in them.

If he were home, he would be working over this just as hard, but he would have Kakashi to help him with some of the less advanced stuff, and his sensei and Kushina would be competing with each other over who could figure out what faster and righter, Setsuna-san would bring them something to drink and then stay and help with putting out things in clean, and Shikaku would complain, complain some more, and in the end help as long ass no one forgot this was a drag-

But he wasn't home. And things were never going to be the way he where. For a moment he felt so utterly, despairingly alone he wished he could cry, stab something, howl loud enough to rival the monster at its worst - anything to make the feeling go away

The tension on his hands and shoulders increased.

(This is what you chose and you are living with it)

That or he would die trying this.

'Very well.' he finally said, pushing himself back from leaning on the table. His demeanor was once again calm and composed, except for his eyes. They looked like pieces of ice chipped from a glacier, and they didn't look at the ANBU in front of him directly. 'Kazekage-sama mentioned they had several seals leftover from Nidaime-sama. I will need them, even those that don't work.'

At least they would give him an idea of how to issue orders in this strange language, and hopefully he would find a way to replace the longer polysigils for the much more manageable simplified seals. He took the scroll from the table

One hundred sixty eight mistakes in just the first one.

He didn't sigh. He didn't trust himself to only do that with any deeper breath than the ones he was taking. He was doing this, and for better or worse, he was doing it on his own. The sooner he got that through his head, the better for whoever might still be alive out there.

In the hypothetical case someone still was.

The wren had only looked at him with the same blank expression – not that if the mask changed at any given time. But if the face couldn't tell it clearly, the body language surely did – the man simply didn't move.

'Kazekage-sama gave you the Nidaime Kazekage's seals.' he muttered, pointing a mental finger at his head, poking at his brain. Something around 'you have it, hellooo, anybody's home?'

'Kazekage-sama only gave me the alphabet.' the blonde said in the same calm tones from before, completely ignoring the cue. The man knew it perfectly well. He had been right in front when the redhead had. 'The only seal I have is the one I saw Kazekage-sama use before any of you arrived.'

Wren just kept looking at him in the same posture – not more relaxed and not more loosened, just… the same. And he was doing nothing.

The blue eyes narrowed for a moment, then closed when the blonde sighed, the tension in his body disappearing.

'I left my baby with an oversized toad because I thought I could help. If you are so against it, I'm going back home.'

'I have orders.' answered Wren with polite tone. It said very vividly that if there was a fault, he was not the one to blame 'And I'm a loyal soldier. If you want it to change, please, contact my boss.'

Minato didn't make a movement to leave, though he no longer felt like staying either. He didn't know why this man in particular was being so hard on him and he didn't really care why either. Minato usually clicked well with someone or didn't, and got along well with those who did, and ignored those he didn't with until it was time to work. And this was the time.

'This might be a stretch of belief, but I will assume that since the village is crumbling on itself, he's out there and kind of busy. And given how Baki is also busy and deducing from a comment Kazekage-sama made on you being in charge of this section…. the highest ranking person to make decisions on regards of stored seals right now is you.'

He reached for the first scroll (one hundred sixty eight mistakes, ahaha) and started rolling it back up, scanning the contents briefly before doing so.

'So, loyal soldier, make your decision. We can work on this and figure something out, I can leave you alone to do whatever you want with my scrolls or I can leave with them and go be a responsible father.'

The man budged on his chair, obviously disturbed by how he was addressed. He didn't feel responsible and also he wasn't left in charge – in this one the man was wrong. Nobody was in charge – only the Kazekage, even if he was out of his mind. Once he fainted then the system was regrouped. So far, the man had to be still conscious, or else he'd get news on where and how he was being deported. He also didn't like the fact he was being put under such choice. He was not good with seals, his working partner was – but he died five hours ago and there was no helping it. He was a lot to do and a lot to learn.

'I'm not doing anything as long as I'm responsible for it with my head.' he stated uneasily. In the end, if he was to be responsible, he'd simply have to risk his life 'Nidaime Kazekage's documents are not something anyone can reach and touch on command. They're the ancestry of Suna, the history written down itself.'

There was a strange, heavy groan from the upper floor- for a moment Minato didn't have an idea what the hell could that be, before realizing it was the wind. The wind coming out of the broken window with enough force to actually move the heavy desks. No wonder Wind country wasn't a tourist hotspot, with such a nice his eyes back down, he looked down at the ANBU.

'No offense, but I don't think Suna will have much use for its history if it's reduced to rubble by morning.' He said evenly. "If the responsibility is too much for you, then shift it. Make a document stating I agree to have this memory erased. You can put me in a genjutsu once I sign it.'

A new memory slot wouldn't be a danger to the carefully sealed ones inside his mind. Only Jiraiya or someone else with a deal with the Toads would be able to open those. The mask shone in the fake light of the room, unmoving. Then he simply tore a card out of his notebook, with one toss making the blank paper form into a whole directed pattern of the highly classified document.

'You sign with blood.' He muttered 'And if you're going to complain that you don't remember your family or the purpose of your existence after you decided to block my genjutsu, it's your problem, not mine.'

He could have laughed at that, if only it hadn't been so terribly sad.

'Newsflash to Suna, Wren.' the blonde said lightly, biting on his thumb the way his teacher had taught him so many years ago and pressing his thumb to the document, eyebrow twitching minutely when it sucked at the blood to create the binding seal. 'I'd pay not to remember. Unfortunately, that's not an option anymore.'

The man didn't answer, only made a handful of hand seals, making the shelves move behind the glass, some sinking deeper, some emerging further. After a mixture of what seemed to be a constant spiral of chaos, one rather old and rather big scroll came out, handed through the glass like a packet of fresh buns.

'On your hands, and gods, I'm not doing this.'

'That also isn't an option, soldier.' the blonde said, sucking on his thumb for a moment before reaching for the scroll. 'I need you to tell me watch each command does, all the ones you can identify.'

The masked man looked at him with obvious unease, and then he leaned back on his chair, writing something with a speed of light on his notepad. And he didn't stop until the whole thing was over.

'This is good.' he said to himself, quickly passing over the seals- seals for securing rooms for royal family, trapdoor seals that turned you inside out unless you used the needed amount of chakra, seals for squeezing the smallest drop of water from sand- oh, smart guy. Some he had translated straight to standard seal signs instead of words.

'…make some ink and get me a brush. I'll write, you correct. In my village we have ninja with an advanced bloodline who can follow chakra with it. Do you have anything like that in here? I need someone who can accurately point how big is the area the Bijuu is stationed in.'

City made of sand meant that Shukaku was everywhere, but not all at once. It was like cloning- bijuus had vast amounts of chakra, and they used that to control their environment. Like flames. Or sand.

Shukaku had to be spreading massive amounts of chakra to make a storm this size, and he probably could old it indefinitely, but there had to be a specific spot where he was at his strongest- where the majority of him and his 'self' resides- likely close to the medium. And if he cut it from the rest- if he could restrain it in the spot…

Wren twirled his pen for a moment and got back to writing.

'We don't sport Hyuuga clones here.' He muttered 'However Dingo can trace chakra.'

'Can he more or less accurately tell me the size of its mass?' Minato said, taking the pen from his sleeve to make some annotations on the side of the instructions 'It doesn't matter if he is mistaken and the actual thing turns out to be smaller than what we'll make, as long as it gets around all of it. It can't be less.'

Wren looked at him for a moment, the pencil moving non stop on the paper.

'Dingo howls to the full moon every night with sorrow and leaves the village because he says his brain will pop out through his ears if he will have to stand so close to the Suna village.' Which meant that if anything, Shukaku grew and fattened through the cycle of moon growing and kazekage just had to allow him to get out – once he had stayed he had been practically crying – very unmanly and wussily – with very salty red tears. The pressure was simply blowing his brain apart and he was still surprised he hadn't changed into vegetable after that. Pure luck, obviously.

'Oh.' Minato said, reaching for the prepared brush and starting to take his own annotations.

That should have been enough.


	7. ɹǝqɯnu 7

It wasn't fast and it wasn't easy - it was insane and it was nigh impossible.

And secretly, he would have admitted to be having something very close to fun if it hadn't been because this was happening now and like this. Minato had always been good at managing seals, both creating them and fixing them. He had an almost visceral understanding of how they worked and what seemed like an unnatural sense that allow him to equilibrate them properly for them to work. His biggest testament to this had to be hirashin, a technique that had taken roughly two years to figure out by heavily modifying the standard teleporting jutsu.

What he was doing now was very much like when the Uzumakis had finally agreed to teach him some of their most advanced techniques; he was learning new, selective things of immeasurable importance. Minato liked seals - he had almost became a specialized jounin before the war had forced him to follow more warfare inclined paths - and the seals apparently liked the ex-Hokage, because they hardly bothered to keep secrets with him. Breaking the equations down, figuring out how they worked (and why and how and when) how to bend them and alter them, making them from scratch with nothing but a base and his imagination and yes- fixing things that anyone who had tried before had claimed impossible- that's what he enjoyed the most.

Konohanin just worked like that.

He first had Wren separate the seals in those who worked and those who didn't (apparently they had a lot more of the latter than the first) and went straight through them at full speed twice, before slowly starting the painful process of detangling them. He didn't need all of them, but breaking them down gave him a chance to see where it was coming from, which helped him deduce formulas.

Like the fact he had been trying to use the scribbly-dotty equivalent to 'you can choose either' instead of 'you must' in all passives. Yeah, that would have gone nicely with the Bijuu 'Would you prefer to rampage through the village to your heart's contents, or would you rather stay still and quiet, mister Fake Monk?'

Yeah, that would have worked so nicely.

It took a few hours, but they did manage to shorten the massive scroll to something more manageable (roughly a full block's length worth of paper shorter), and these new connectants surely would work better, or at least they had the ever so optimistic Wren personal seal of approval (consisting in telling him when the beast ate his soul, he wasn't going to go down for it).

While the Sunanin finished checking what they had written, he had taken a break and leafed through the failed seals just out of curiosity- and there it was. He found what they had needed from the beginning in one of the unusable scrolls. It was a wonder they hadn't seen it from the beginning- sure, it was smudged with what looked like blood, and the main seal was so swarmed by sigils it was a wonder they could see it at all, but Minato had. It had been written with a different type of brush from the others after all.

'حرام ' .

'Haraam'.

'Forbidden'. And by superior Godly law, no less.

It wasn't the exact same, but it was similar enough to the command of the Death God when it took a life that Minato easily recognized it. By law of the gods, and those would always have a say over the matter of humans and even of demons. He could see why it hadn't worked either, it wasn't - well, calibrated right. This was easily the meanest command he had ever seen, requiring thousands of sacrifices to work. An inhuman amount of chakra.

But, if he used the *other* side of the scroll, if he used the side that would be facing outside the center, to those crazy amounts of demonic chakra being so easily wasted in the air - a specified chakra draining seal could do it easily! He had Shukaku's name, he could make the command. All it would take was for a single chakra-infused grain of sand to touch it and it would activate on everything outside the perimeter - the radius was a mere matter of repeating the connectants until the command covered enough terrain and make sure they weren't even/uneven with the seal on the other side…

It was doable. Not easy and not fast, but doable.

'We are doing this.' he smiled slightly, the smudge of ink on his cheek dark against his pale face.

And if this worked, he swore on his baby he was giving this to the Kazekage as a gift and without asking for anything in return and keep his grabby Leafnin hands to himself.

Wren had only looked skeptically at him, but didn't say a thing. The work the man had made here was impressive and he couldn't take it away from him – but he still felt uncomfortable. Especially when at one point he simply stopped following his logic. But if that was going to calm the murderous beast, who knows, maybe after kicking him outside the town, Kazekage will remember about him and will bring him back in full glory. That didn't sound bad, it was only uncomfortable, because it required time. A lot of it. And a bit of luck, providing that he needed to be alive at the end of this experiment.

He rose up from the chair.

'Doing or not, I hope you have written what you wanted down.' he said as he closed the scroll 'Because in a moment you will get lots of what's happened today locked into a nice shiny box that will never open again.'

'Between you and me, I'd kind of wait for this to be over when you do that. This is really not going to be the best of moments for me to forget something important.'

What did his man expect him to do, join the myriad of people outside having mint tea under the palms and skin-peeling sand so he could share what awesome shiny toys the second Kazekage kept in his crazy man scrolls? He didn't really care either way - sure, it had been great to get to play with said shiny toys, probably the first stirs of actual excitement for anything he had felt in months - but he had known from the beginning it was borrowed knowledge, and it wasn't like if he would miss it after all.

He looked at his own scroll, which was nowhere near as wide as the original ones he had brought and insanely longer than before (he didn't even know scrolls of these lengths were even *made*).

'The village is set in a circular shape, and the scroll will need to be put around the area-' he pulled sweaty bangs off his eyes, sighing. 'A… pentagram? Pentagrams work best in circles-' Hell if he knew why, circles just worked better with uneven triggers.'Right, we need to set them around whatever size of an area we are talking about so they can activate it- that means 5 people with better than average control of chakra.'

He looked at the man.

'Do you know any other three available?'

Wren moved his head to the side. He didn't like the fact Minato wanted him to wait. The longer he held the knowledge the worse it was for his reputation, after all, the tendency to slip was proportional to the passing time.

'Other three, meaning beside you and me? Let's see.' he mused, pointing out fingers to count down 'Yura is working on the top barrier, he can't. Baki helps Kazekage-sama, he won't. Vulture is building the net between the eastern side of the village, he is unable to. Just like most of the current army, apparently.' he stopped, pointing at the man with the silence, that he was obviously asking for impossible. However, after a moment, he continued 'But as far as I know, Lark came out of the hospital some time ago and Thorny Devil is unable to help with the barrier, so she only does the supporting.' Which probably didn't mean that much, so he could call her here. 'As for the third person, I think I can try to call Roadrunner.'

Because Jerboa was still on retirement, and given how he couldn't speak or see was rather not helpful. Not that he wouldn't fight if he was supposed to.

Minato considered letting Wren know in detail how he appreciated his marked optimism in such a situation, but given how that wouldn't accomplish anything besides pissing the man who was at least now trying to be useful except maybe piss him off, he kept it for himself.

'Thorny Devil has great chakra control.' Minato mused, internally relieved that Lark was already out of the hospital. As much as he had tried not to think about it, he had worried he'd be stuck like that. One of his academy friends had ended up with a memory that lasted him all of five hours before going back to ten years ago after a Rocknin had given him a particularly rattling hit during chuunin exams. Not that he was friends with the man or anything, just… It was better.

'All right. Gather everyone. We will also need someone to signal and do it all at the same time. You better tell-' he stopped, then shook his head 'Never mind. Let's get everyone here and see how we manage to crawl outside to make this work. Get Dingo's map.'

For a moment he had almost told the man to warn Baki or someone if similar rank of what they were going to do so they wouldn't think the end of the world was coming when the sand suddenly ceased its attack. But given how he didn't know it was going to work, it was better not to raise their hopes.

'Get it yourself, Dingo is in the room nearby.' Said Wren with offended tone, like if the man had somehow managed to make bad impression on him by ordering him around – which he did from some time now – and he turned his back on him. A moment later a very badly tuned radio station creaked through the air with bits of words that even the most intelligent beings couldn't recognize. The man had only repeated one order over and over again until someone had turned the radio off. And then he did it again.

'Library. Meeting. Now. Library. Meeting. Now…'

'What is it.'

The door on the other side opened, showing the bulky tanned man, who seemed to have his whole head bandaged under the mask – including his ears and eyes. It was stained with blood on several parts. Minato didn't seem to consider the man's offense one way or another, instead turning to the newcomer with a slight smile and a bow while internally cringing. He'd never heard of people being this sensitive to chakra… some advanced bloodline? What a joy to have when these sort of things happened.

'Hello, Namikaze Minato.' he said politely. 'Wren has told me you can accurately pin-point where the biggest part of the Bijuu is gathering? I need to know where and how much that is as accurately as possible, please.'

The man had for a moment moved his head sideways, like if he was confused about what he was doing here, then he hung his head lowly.

'I will do my best, Hokage-sama.' he muttered in a low, bitter voice, and then he had slowly started undoing the bandages. Even as his mask was on, he seemed to have no problem with doing that as it didn't move from the place. As it came, under the bandage was a head tattooed on one side and with hair cut in strange patterns, matching the complicated writing above the left ear. The man also wore earrings, but it was hard to tell what kind of color they were – the blood covered them too well.

The man looked at him, but he didn't move, say anything or even make hand seals. He just stood in the place. A few seconds after, the blood started pouring through his ears and the mask started glowing, the most visibly in the place where nose was supposed to be.

'There.' he said, pointing at the north east, through the wall 'The part placed in empty hole in the ground, bordering with the dusty desert, a homeland for the poorer part of the town. It's trying to bite at the ground, so the town would collapse down.'

And as it seemed, he succeeded, but Dingo didn't seem to be worried. A moment later the mask started cracking, starting on the nose's point. The man hung his head low, the glow stopping all at once.

'I'm sorry, I have migraine.' he muttered 'I will point you the more durable location in a few seconds, when the attack is gone.'

Minato winced at the sight of the blood. His knowledge as a medinin was decidingly lacking and he'd be the first to admit it, but as far as he knew, head hemorrhages weren't advisable as far as health was concerned.

'Do you want to sit down?' he said, breaching the man's personal bubble with the lack of thought most ninja from Konoha accidentally displayed by placing a hand on his arm. Tunneling down the ground? Why was the creature so pissed? Between sleeping and the initial work on the seal at least full day had passed, there was no way the baby was still upset enough to cause such destruction. Had he fallen asleep? Did the monster have any other trigger? Or was the old seal shitty enough once open the beats was out and about for as long as it wanted?

He had to stop this.

'No, no, I just need to… wait.' said the man, lifting his head up. He didn't react to the touch to the arm, probably either too sick or taught better to care. He wiped his ears with a bandage. As it came, at least one earring had to be blue. He chuckled for a moment, until he stopped, most likely with wince.

'I remember when the west side of the town collapsed.' he muttered 'At least we have two cemeteries now.'

Then his nose started glowing again and he once again moved to the northern east.

'It's directly between the number four and nineteen of the buildings. The ground is the weakest there and the barrier is lacking.' he muttered. Wren looked at him, then cursed. Dingo slowly shook his head. 'Don't report it yet or the monster will move. I think you want it in one place now.'

He stopped, wincing again, his nose fading and glowing for a few times like a broken lamp, then he straightened.

'It ends up with the beginnings of the desert grounds. Then chakra mixes with grains. Don't try stepping on it, it had probably changed into moving sands.'

Then he looked up, seeming to remember about something.

'The direction is changing.' he muttered. 'Don't move out in the next fifteen minutes.'

And with that, he hung his head low again, stopping the jutsu.

'Is there anything else you want me to do?' he muttered, not even rising his head now.

'We won't… Listen-'

Minato didn't think about what he was doing or what he was losing because it didn't matter on the short or long run. If Suna had a problem with it, they could go complain to his village, and he had marked the spots with their full knowledge and blessing. Oh, they trusted Suna to keep him, not to give him back nicely in the hypothetical case they did need him back, so they had made him place several points of escape on their way here. The closest and most obvious was in a cave roughly sixteen miles from the village.

And it wasn't like if he'd use them anytime soon.

'Do you want me to take you out of the village? It will take less than a minute.'

This guy was having his brain pushed out of his ears thanks to the monster outside, and regardless of how often this happened (often, if Dingo's comment was any way to go) or whose fault it was this had happened at all, he didn't want to deal of it if he could help it.

'You can't get outta the village.' said the man, then slowly started bandaging his head. 'Besides, this would lead you nowhere. There's no good place to station around the village now, unless it's the next town. Or maybe not.'

Because at the next town sands stopped. But sand had this annoying ability it moved with the wind. So it could be the danger spread over there too. He sighed as he covered his ears.

'Excuse me.'

And with that, he was gone into his room again.

'Though day for us all.' muttered someone behind him. As it came, it was Lark, still smelling of herbal medicines from the hospital. Minato didn't discuss that he actually could very comfortably get out because that would only cause him trouble. Instead he gave the man with the bird mask a slight welcoming gesture with his hand.

'Some more than others, I guess. How often does this happen, again?'

'Once a month, so far this had only been successful once.' said Lark. A moment later Thorny Devil appeared behind him, her hair all messed up with sand and wind. 'We don't know the pattern yet, but it has nothing to do with the moon. It's probably the fact that sandstorms weaken the village and are great additional power from nature to help play with the loose sand… or something.'

'Or something.' Repeated Thorny Devil, trying to undo her hair. So far, in vain. 'Good afternoon. The southern barrier looks fine, but Satetsu had collapsed from hunger. The wind also looks like if it was about to change directions.'

'Because it will.' said Wren, closing the radiolocator. 'Had someone opened the window?'

Nobody answered. Wren had cursed under his breath and ran up to the closest frame. A moment later, along with the burst of wind, sand and dust, the fourth persona broke in, trying to stop in the middle of the run, but not quite succeeding. It had the mask of a greater roadrunner.

'I hate you!' he shouted completely ungracefully as he jumped and landed right in front of Lark. He seemed to be of the height of a professional basketball player. 'I hate you all! Why do you always have to leave the window closed when I'm about to arrive! The weather outside is awful enough to make my fragile heart cry!'

'Sorry about that…' muttered Lark, but before he could say anything else, he was hugged with passion that looked decisively weird for a Sunanin. And yet, there was no mistake about that it was a man at least living in this place for long – the skin color matched all three in the room.

'That's all right, sweetheart.' he said to the other man, brushing him consolingly like an old aunt. Then, at the cough of the girl, he had only then noticed Minato.

'Oh, oh my.' he said, stopped, like if something had paused all his doings. '…are you free tonight?'

'It's Hokage-sama, show some respect!' shouted Wren, pushing him by the shoulders 'And only because you're on your period doesn't mean you can act like if you were in mating season! Bow down.'

Roadrunner bowed down.

'Just Minato is all right.' the blond said, a large sweatdrop appearing next to his face. This was a bit more like what he was used to now.

'I …might have been before, but if I'm not dead by then, I'll probably be grounded or in a hospital.' he said with a small smile 'But if I'm not any of those sure. You might have to fight Lark for the honor, though, he asked first.'

'Oh, that wouldn't be a problem, I'm inviting you all. Bonding is what I believe in, Hokage-sama.' said the other man 'But personally I think that it's not right to make them stand between you and me.'

Thorny Devil sighed again.

'Just ask him for an autograph. Later. Now I want to know what are we here for.'

Minato found himself smiling - yeah, this guy definitely reminded him of home. However, Devil was right, if they did have fifteen minutes (now more like thirteen and a half) he better explain them as accurately as possible.

'So, um-' he trailed off, turning to give a look at the scroll before shrugging. 'I made a seal that will stop Shukaku for now, and we need to surround the biggest part of him and activate it for it to work. It will stop everything outside of the perimeter and force what's inside to lay low for a while.' He winced when something smacked against the side of the building. 'A long while, if it's so happily spending this much chakra.'

'Stop Shukaku?' repeated Lark. The rest just looked back at him in silence with blank masked faces.

'Stop laughing.' Finally said Wren. 'It's true.'

'Okay, but what are we really doing?' said Lark again, obviously not believing that 'No, really.'

Minato just smiled back.

'No, really, that's exactly what we are doing. I spent a full day writing a scroll big enough to contain it from both sides, and I assure you, I have better things to waste my obsessive-compulsive disorder on.'

Tiny cute things with his hair and his lover's face crossed by scratch-like marks, for example.

'So, sealing Shukaku, you are in? Yes/yes answers, please.'

The ANBUs slowly moved their heads to the sides, each one of them tossing a glance at the other, only to turn back to starring at the blonde.

'I have a little sister.' muttered Thorny Devil. It was more of a warning than a resignation sign.

'We're in.' said Roadrunner.

Minato could have sat down and maybe hid under the desk for the next ten minutes - yes, thank you very much for putting absolutely no pressure on him at all. Living in a village who might or not get re-leveled once a month was perfectly normal, sure. The crazy, suicidal idea was trying to put a stop to it.

'If we do this right, all should go well-' and he truly believed this. This might have been something he had created in a frenzy and with something he had never worked with before, but it *felt* leveled and that's all that mattered. He pulled out the map Wren had given him before, making a wide circles between the marked area.

'Dingo said the larger mass was between the buildings four and nineteen, so we will surround it as far a circle as we are allowed…' It was a pity they hadn't had more time to make it even bigger. Or more hands to write it. Or more people to proofread it and so on. 'The beginnings of the desert grounds are supposed to be quicksand, so step away from those… Basically just lay this down and activate it with blood, that's all the chakra you will need. The largest seals go face down on the sand, longer ones up. We need to split at even degrees to form a pentagram.'

He thought of explaining what the seals said to the people, but Wren wouldn't have liked it, and besides, these people were ANBU. They probably were used to it.

'Questions?'

The blank masks of animals had only moved to the sides.

'All right, I'll go first.' said Wren, looking at the whole group 'I know the location and the specific points. Lark and Thorny Devil take points and pinpoint the exact parameters of the circle. Roadrunner…'

He gave took out the scroll from his pocket and gave it to the tall man.

'…you draw the thing. After that we will move the seals into right directions, and that's the job of Hokage-sama. In ten seconds we scatter. Anything else we should know before that?'

The last question was tossed at Minato. The blond started to shake his head, then thought about it better.

'I don't know how sudden this is going to be when it happens, but the ground mass is going to be forced to go back as nicely as possible. That shouldn't destroy too much because I specified against it, but to power such a command the seal facing skyward is going to siphon the chakra used to power the storm. That means all that power is going to be cut off suddenly. So, you know - try not to get buried by it. It'll be the worst where we are. Actually - just give me your hands.'

Anyone who wanted to survive would already be somewhere sheltered, so the only ones one would have to worry about were the shinobi outside themselves. They should be able to work on that themselves, but the biggest mass would be directly over them. The ANBU looked at him, then the Thorny Devil simply caught him under his arm.

'See you on place.' she said to Roadrunner, who, for some reason didn't join the circle, and they disappeared. The moment the appeared on the surface of the world again it was hot, windy, dirty, full of sand and air pressure from all possible sides, tossing loose things at will without much logic.

'Move!' roared Wren, though in the middle of the sandstorm it could be barely hearable. A moment later, he jumped forward, heading toward the known direction, leading the way.

'Wait, no!'

Minato didn't catch them all. He got the female ANBU, easy because she was closest to him, and he caught Lark as well, but Roadrunner ran off too fast for him to do anything, and when he was about to plant the seal on Wren the wind nearly knocked him off before he found his feet. And when he found them, he was already gone. Gods.

Minato swore under his breath (Kushina would have been especially proud) and followed, trying to find a compass when the world seemed to be composed of a pepper shaker. At least that's what the sand felt like on his skin, and he wouldn't be surprised if he was rubbed raw in the process. No wonder some Sunanin had ridiculously smooth skin, how was this for exfoliation?

They still had a few more minutes, and while he was sure he was in the right direction, he wasn't exactly sure where he was supposed to go. He was supposed to find the stop between the Village's outer barrier and building twenty-three, and he had found the barrier. But where the hell was building twenty-three?

Fucking unimaginative Suna architects and their stupid round houses all the same color and looking the same and with their identification numbers half ripped-

Oh, building twenty five! He would have been much happier to have finally found his sense of direction if it hadn't been because just as he spotted what had to be the 23rd building, the one he had just passed hadn't groaned like some sleepy giant and started veering to the right. The whole area was starting to sink.

'Oh, fuck me.'

He ran.

Very soon he was caught up with the other pair of legs, holding up Roadrunner. The man seemed to be not moved at the least by the fact he had to ran through half of the village in less than a few seconds and he also held in hands now a bucket with very oily ink.

'Where are we going?' he screamed through the wind, his figure blanking and melting with the background with the sand waves 'I can't see the others.'

'I can't see half a meter in front of me.' Minato answered not really caring if the man heard such a useless comment or not. 'Building twenty three!' he shouted over the sandstorm, pointing at the building in question. 'Well have to hurry before all of this sinks! '

'Sure!' said Roadrunner and simply vanished from before his eyes, jogging even faster through the wind. Something had flashed in the cloud as one of the ninjas put the sign on the ground and stepped away.

'Roger, the place pinpointed!' said Thorny Devil, appearing in a moment in front of him and then, disappearing 'We're starting to draw! Please, look out for Roadrunner!'

A moment later something had flashed, spilling paint everywhere. The string of it was so thin one would think it was painted with the smallest brush for details – and yet, it didn't break.

Minato should have marked when he had the chance, not that he had had much of one. If he had, he wouldn't have had a problem finding it in this mess of a storm that threatened to choke him with its killer intent. He tried to tell himself the sand didn't really look as dark as he imagined it to be or that he didn't smell a faint metallic tinge to it. By now he might as well be imagining this, but the fact the sand was actively trying to murder him didn't really help, and with such creatures, who knew? Fire wasn't supposed to be alive either and yet (and yet)…

He stopped.

The world was sand and sand was everywhere, so he closed his eyes and covered his ears against it

(How many minutes?)

And breathed.

He could feel it down, down below, and he wondered if it was awake or merely dreaming, if it could feel him the way he could- big and dark and as reasonable as a venus flytrap, all teeth and hunger that couldn't be satisfied with a sacrifice or a million of them. Why would someone willingly put a demon inside of them, offer one's soul to be broken and devoured, and to save… what? To accomplish what?

_I'm not mad_

(You can't break me)

_I don't want to dance_

(You can't make me)

_I will not eat_

(I will starve you if that's what it takes)

_my existence is my cause_

(I live for something and I'm stronger than you)

He opened his eyes and the world was red, and the sky was red and so was the sun. A world that might as well be made of flame- and this was the world he lived in now.

When he tried to take a step he nearly fell down because in the few seconds he had wasted looking around sand had almost covered him up to his knees, and he had to shake it off himself without using chakra because he didn't dare- not so close to the body. It was hell to navigate with virtually nothing to guide himself, but he could feel the way the wind was affected on his right side so that meant the outer walls of the village couldn't be that far away, and after a few moments he was able to find his marking.

He'd read once a story about the earth being nothing more than an egg for some sort of creature that couldn't even be imagined. He thought of the one burrowed under the city-

Did it think, did it feel, did it dream in its little nest of quartz and silica and stone…?

'Wake up, fake monk…' he said against lips that cracked and bled from the element's abuse.'You are forbidden from taking a step further.'

The first grain of sand fell against the ink that started glowing an eerily silver the moment his blood fell on it.

_Please work._

For a moment nothing seemed to change – only the howl of the wind was just as loud and as mocking as ever, along with grains beating at the walls and grounds. And then – the shake. A literal shake, like if they were in a big blender that was obscurely pushed up and down while mixing everyone to the sides. The floor rose a bit up, in a big wheeze the tired earth seemed to make, and then, at one snap of second all sand in the air literally fell on the ground, revealing the empty districts, the flaring points of ninja around the air pumping their chakra and the bright barrier all around the sky. The sound stopped also, making the desert's silence sound almost like a punch to the ears. Wren, who was only a few steps away actually caught himself by the ears and almost fell on the ground. Everything's stopped.

'Did it work?' asked Lark, standing at one point behind the wall. Thorny Devil climbed up, looking around the town. It seemed to be eerie.

'The sandstorm suddenly have stopped!' she shouted to the others.

'How unusual…' murmured Lark. A moment later Roadrunner jogged nearby.

'It seems so easy now it's done.' he said, rubbing behind his ear. The sand fell on the ground in lifeless forms. 'I was expecting more explosions or problems, or-'

Crack.

The ground made a sound. Then, two big black eyes opened on the ground, completely unaffected by the fact one building was standing on it's pupil or the fact that they were people above it. They blinked and then moved sideways, locating all the ninjas.

'You had to jinx it, hadn't you.' muttered Lark in annoyed tone as the eye looked at him. But so far nothing has happened. If anything, the Shukaku seemed to be surprised that it saw them – and just curiously looked at them, eyeing them like interesting bugs.

After a few seconds, they closed. Silence.

They looked at each other in silence, warily. It was almost too good, like if it went according to the plan, like if it went too well, like if they… forgot about something…

'…the ground is empty…' muttered Wren suddenly, making the others look at him. 'Who evacuated citizens from this district?'

'There was an evacuation?'

Two seconds after that the ground cracked again. And the whole northern east district of the town started sinking, with rather loud crash of buildings.

Minato stared back at the eyes, at the building that so softly were falling down. Some sunk at what seemed to be the speed of an hour glass emptying itself, others leaned to their sides, knocked on other buildings with deafening clashes of stone and debris and actually very little crystal. They stayed that way as if trying to see who had the biggest push before slowly leering in that direction.

Now that the sky had stopped from falling people were coming out of them too, or at least they were making good tries. Their best bet was getting to the upper floor and hope their building wouldn't collapse in too brisk an angle.

The problem was the instability of the floor. And how it had literally turned to quicksand.

_I can't do this again._

After what had happened he had woken up to a baby without a mother, a village that was falling to pieces and more casualties that could be counted, and he hadn't had any other options than push everything until he actually had time to deal with it. At least this time it wasn't his responsibility.

'Orders?' he asked on the intercom, brushing what felt like a kilo of sand from the neck of his shirt and moving towards the sinking mess. He already knew what they would be.

'What orders?' scrunched the intercom with a nervous shout, then closed with a loud crack. The four ninjas around him immediately moved to the closest buildings, trying to at least take out the villagers who needed them, but was a droplet in the sea of needs. The barrier didn't break and besides that, no visible ninja who was the part of the barrier – obviously not needed now – moved from it. The intercom crashed again.

'What's going on here?' someone shouted from it. Then it made a loud crack and then the known voice of the Kazekage screamed through it 'What the hell is happening? Someone, report! Who is this? Someone, check out the northern district, what's with this dust-'

The intercom cracked with someone literally screaming through it something that was sounding like a mix between 'oh my god' and 'holly hell' and then it cracked back to the Kazekage's voice '-to the sandstorm? What's the cause? Is anyone listening to me here?'

The group of jounins suddenly showed up from the west and they stopped dead in the middle of the step, literally standing and gaping, like deers waiting for the truck to drive over them.

'I can't do this!' shouted Lark, letting go of the woman with two kids near the Minato, all of them crying from fear – and then, vanishing again. Another group of ninjas showed up from the southern side, this time not stopping, but immediately moving to the sinking buildings. But then, the black eye opened on the ground again, making both new groups freeze, and literally start screaming out of fear. In one short word: chaos.

Did the world hate him? Did the universe have some sort of strange compelling *hatred* for his person or something? Had he accidentally insulted some Mayor Deity or something?

'Namikaze Minato here.' he said as calmly as he could while he grabbed the hysterical smallest kid, put it in the hysterical woman's arms and reached for the bigger hysterical child. 'I don't have time to explain, but ignore the thing on the floor. It's not going to move now, it's not going to attack, it's just going to stay there and stare because it's sealed, so feel free to come help because this place is sinking and there's like a billion people in these buildings. Can you use the barrier to stabilize the sand? That would really be great. Out.'

Taking the woman by the arm, he teleported the three of them to the first place he could think of, which was the tallest floor of the ANBU office. The place was a mess and the furniture was mostly toppled over, but it was stable, so he told her to stay there and moved down, looking in his pockets- he didn't have that many. Twenty at best.

He ran the two levels down, in search for the handful of ANBU he had seen before.

'But what the hell is this?' shouted some jounin from far away, while most of them just stood still, starring at the big eye that starred back. The ones who got the worst panic attacks through barely breathed while the other screamed for and after them.

'Barrier is to protect the village from the sandstorm!' cracked through the intercom with a voice of Kazekage, who seemed to be on the higher level of anger already 'Who is this? State your name and the status of the current situation!'

Because really, no one else seemed to even try to enlighten him on what was going on, as half of them was still doing the barrier, the rest was just scared, confused or trying to act – which left him cut out from the information. It was obvious he was desperate to get any ounce of information.

'What is sinking? Where? Is something bad happening at the northern district? Why is the sandstorm gone? Can anyone tell me anything?'

'We don't know, the sandstorm seems to be ceased.'

'From my point it looks like genjutsu-'

'Send help!'

'It's completely calm, besides what seems the fire at the northern area-'

'It's not fire! HELP-'

'I want to talk to the leader of the situation!'

The ANBus that were on his way seemed to be just as confused, half of them trying to talk through communicators as others just starred through the windows. It seemed that the main intelligence of communication had failed. Cursing foully under his breath (Kushina would have been elated) Minato turned the intercom on again.

'YES. EX-HOKAGE HERE.' he grit as calmly as he could, which wasn't much by now. 'Storm is OVER. Northern district is SINKING and there's a giant FACE looking out of it. But don't worry, the face WON'T. MOVE. Now do something so the sand stops because SOPPING THE SANDSTORM caused everything to sink. OVER.'

He glared at the ANBU gaping at him like if he'd grown half a dozen new heads all speaking funny new languages.

'What are you looking at? Grab these.' he said, throwing a handful of marked kunai to the group. 'I can take about ten people at the same time, so leave these in the buildings where there's too many people for you to get out easily, wounded, elderly, you know the drill.'

He changed frequencies trying to find the erring soldier who had gotten away.

'Lark? I need you to find some place where the civilians can be taken for the time being, see if you can get some medinins.'

Lark looked at him with a posture being one big sign of shame – tense shoulders, lowered head, even curled toes at feet – if it was even more possible for him to burn from shame, he probably would.

'Y-yes, Hokage-sama.' he muttered and looked at the quiet group of ANBUs. There his silence seemed to break. 'Haven't you heard him? There are people dying out there! Move it, move it, move it!' And with that, half of ANBU had practically vanished right into the thin air. The other one stood still, looking at the kunais with lack of trust.

'What is this?' asked one. The intercom had finally seemed get back to life.

'What do you mean sandstorm is over? Why are you even there? Why is the district skinning- oh, to hell with this! Let me go! Let me go-'

'But Kazekage-sama-'

There had been some sound of a fight going on on the radio as another group of ANBUs just vanished, holding the kunais. The rest still seemed to be indecisive. A pair of ANBUs suddenly showed up, holding a wounded elder and a man without consciousness.

'I don't know where are we supposed to take him, so I leave them here.' he said and he vanished again.

'Idiot!' screamed someone who looked very similar to wearing the mask of ostrich, and then, another dozen of ANBUs vanished. It seemed the sight of the wounded people had finally worked as the pushing factor. Then, something made a crack – crack very similar to the wood breaking – and the whole barrier just fell into tiny pieces, letting the wind circulationin, along with the massive sun rays. Ninjas holding the barriers had immediately vanished from the standing points, but the first flash was blinding enough for everyone to stop at the moment. A moment later the Kazekage showed up in the room, looking like if he desperately wanted to get the job of the Reaper.

He looked at the blond, then at the people, and in half of a second his eyes went from nasty yellow to hideous pink, along with the skin color.

'WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE? MOVE OUT!' he screamed at them, making them all vanish. Then he looked at the blond. 'Five seconds for explanation why Gaara is dead.'

The old man coughed, and fell on the floor into the fearsome bow. Daichi didn't even toss him a glance.

Minato was never more glad he had an actual excuse to run away than now, because the redhead looked a little scary and the sudden increase of temperature made him want to sit and maybe not think for a year or two. So he just shrugged carelessly.

'He isn't, I found a way to stop your little pet, I don't know if it's going to work again and really, we can discuss this later over tea and pastries if you want, but right now I'm the person who can get the biggest number of civilians out, so, do you really want to waste time in sociality's right now?'

'This is not an explanation, but five seconds are over and I don't want to lose life.' said the Kazekage as he made the seal. The room's walls suddenly dropped like cards, changing into the sand and increasing the space widely 'I'm going to make the shortcut of medics here, bring at least one hundredth of people here. The others are the hospital and the big place in the centre of the town. Move out.'

'Lady and two kids in the room upstairs, didn't seem hurt, but I didn't quite check,' Minato said as answer, poofing out without even saluting. He didn't actually plan for it, but when he remembered about it – about a million and one hours later - he didn't really regret it.


	8. 8

'…do I have to go to that meeting?' Minato asked giving the water cooler he was abandoning sadly. Just when he was planning an affair with it. 'Can't the meeting come to me or something? I can wait.'

His face hurt- as it turns out that going around in the middle of the sand storm did a bit more than just exfoliate him, and dropping sun on that hadn't been a great idea - his hands hurt, sand had gotten under the bandages and his stitches again (he hoped the desert branch of the family of summons wasn't nearly as prone to nagging as his usual familiars were but didn't really hold much hope for it). His back hurt (ceilings weren't nearly as cushy as one would have expected them to be when they collapsed on you) sweat made the skin abrasions and cut burn and some bastard (he was betting Wren) had rattled on him about knowing his seals and he had been drafted as medinin assistant into making seals so his back was killing him.

It wasn't the first time he did this sort of work, but he had only done that sort of thing when Jiraiya was angry at him as punishment. He thought he was beyond being grounded. And the medinin here? They didn't even have the decency of using low cut shirts like Tsunade-sensei did.

He had sand in places not even Kushina knew about.

Also he had the feeling all this work wasn't going to count as overtime when his paycheck came. Lark from the other bed looked at him in silence, his mask obviously not wincing from the oily dirty mixture that was poured over his cuts and bruises. But his body was surely tense as it was visible with veins on his neck.

'You're the Hokage.' he muttered with strain 'Say whatever you want, Hokage-sama, this duty is not something you can go off with.'

'And I'm not letting you get me blamed for everything.' said Wren, looking at him from his very non-bruised form – once covered in clothes of course. He still wore the old sandied clothes, unable to change them. The doors opened and the red-haired kage stood in them.

'What taking you all so long?' he asked and instantly vanished. 'Hurry up!' could be heard from the halls, slowly retreating with steps.

'Yeah, I know.' the blonde said, ignoring the master and giving the shorter man a friendly punch in the arm 'But since I don't have a choice, I might as well complain. And technically, Sarutobi-sama is the Hokage, so you might as well start calling me Minato.'

He didn't bother answering Wren because if the man wanted to worry, well, he was free to do so. Personally, Minato didn't see what the problem was. Dealing with very important classified information, sure, he could understand concerns. Considering said concerns were about to be sealed inside his brain, that negated the concerning part of it. And that was it.

'Yeah… better not.' Said Lark with a hushed tone. 'Some people might not like it.'

And it was very obvious who even if the man did nothing to indicate whom he meant. It was less obvious why or why he thought that, but a lot of things ran through ANBU like that, so if anything, it was disturbing and not surprising. Wren tensed and looked at the opened door.

'Complaining is something we forget exists.' he said and started making gestures of writing on the thin air. Only after few seconds he saw what he was doing and stopped. 'I can't seal your memories yet, not when you're supposed to stand before the council.'

'Of course not.' the blonde said agreeable, pretending to ignore the man sliding helplessly into his obsessive-compulsive tic. Apparently he wasn't the only one in need of some rest, but he doubted any of that was coming soon. He didn't want to think like a kage, but apparently it wasn't something he was going to be able to shake as easily as his good disposition towards the world. A whole district down. There had been a surprisingly low amount of deaths, mostly thanks to the sturdiness of both the buildings and the people. It had been just a matter of digging them out, but he had no idea what sort of juggling would be involved from the Kazekage to get all of them properly watered and fed. And that was the immediate concern, where they were going to be living and such pressing matters alone would probably mean the redhead would be getting as much asleep as his baby was. 'They are going to fight you for the pleasure of it anyway.'

'I don't find anything of that pleasurable. Can we go?' asked Wren, gripping his forearms tightly. As much as he seemed to want to look relaxed, it didn't really work. Someone passed the door from the other side, someone let out a shout of pain. Lark heaved and hung his head low.

'…I don't want to hear how this poem is going to sound.' he muttered 'Rivers of screams running through my ears, oh joy.'

'Shut up.' muttered Wren 'Poem of Roadrunner is delightful in comparison of old people ruining my ruined mood. Let's go.'But before he could exit the room, the big black eye opened on the floor and looked up at him.

'Oh yeah, that reminds me.' He muttered before stepping on it. The eye didn't even budge 'How are we going to explain black eyes appearing everywhere in town? It hadn't happened before.'

Minato shrugged, and seeing how no one was doing anything and that if he stood in the same place another moment he might as well sit down and have a nap, opened the doors himself.

'Mass genjutsu, mass hysteria, mirage, earthquake dislodging minerals with hallucinogens, posttraumatic stress, summon gone wrong, aliens…'

Wren pointed at the blinking eye.

'And if that shows up there? Such meetings can be very long and this…' the eye closed and appeared five centimeters away from the previous location '…does whatever it wants.'

And was creepy as hell, but he was not going to say that out loud.

Minato stared at it. It was amazing how the thing wasn't giving off any killing intent. Without all that directionless murderous rage coating it, it was just sentient raw chakra, which somehow made it even more eerie.

'It can show wherever there's sand, and everything in this village is made of it, so though luck.' he said, walking ahead. 'I guess I could make something to keep it out of the room, but I don't think anyone here would have enough chakra to activate it.' Not because it would take that much of it. Simply because everyone had been drained by two days of rescuing and with how things were going if a jounin dared faint out of chakra depletion, he was more likely to be lynched by a stressed medinin than actually helped. Wren looked back at him helplessly as the eye behind him simply closed and vanished from the room. He would want to say he was indeed capable to help, but he wasn't and lying here would only make things much more worse (because hell was paved with good intentions). He opened his mouth behind the mask, but before he could let any sound go off, the door banged open and the very annoyed (no, he was enraged – thought Lark) stepped in (no, he is scared to death – thought Wren).

'I have enough of you!...' Daichi hissed through his teeth with strange tone of voice, almost like if a balloon was trying to sound angry, but only wheezed out air. Then he stepped in and caught Minato by hair 'Shut up and come or I don't know what!...'

And he walked out, dragging the blonde like if he was dragging a first grader and not a fellow ex-kage. It worked for all of the half second that took for the blonde to poof out of his grasp and reappear some feet away from him. And the only reason he wasn't in some other building entirely is that he didn't have enough energy to do anything more complicated than simple teleport.

Minato didn't say anything or move, just stood with a hand massaging the spot where the hair had been yanked and giving a redhead a look that was easily thirty degrees below room temperature. Daichi had only tsked and locked his hands in immortal and neverending irky move – crossed hands in front of his chest.

'You either go willingly or I get frustrated and you go willingly.'

The blonde's eyebrows raised in a slightly amused expression, as if he somehow knew better than the redhead. He entertained the thought of leading the bastard through a mad chase for just the pleasure of irking him, but the more time he wasted here, the more time until he got back to Naruto. Pulling his hand back and discarding the few strands yanked in the not-struggle, he followed.

And so they went. It wasn't a long journey, but indeed full of tension. Daichi didn't even utter a word, just walked straight as needle, still with his hands locked in the same wary pose, making him look like a walking statue. However, when he finally stopped, the room they were in wasn't the room of political agreements.

'You do something about it before I get back from saving your sorry ass or we will talk like enemies.' he muttered and simply pushed the blonde inside the very poorly decorated, very brightly lightened room . Then he simply locked the door and walked away.

'I -what?' save *his* ass? He hadn't done anything but stop a rampaging demon and this is how he was thanked? This firmly put Suna one step below Konoha in terms of gratefulness. Just when he thought no one could get even close… The bright lights did nothing for his headache besides seeming to make it melt into bright hot lines of liquid fire, and he closed his eyes and sighed. The room he was thrown in was vaguely familiar, somewhat blinding and currently sporting a familiar person. Well, at least he was still alive.

'Yo, good to see you.' he said as he walked a few steps closer towards the male in the corner. 'Mind translating what I'm supposed to do here? I'm not fluent in crazy.'

The other man simply moved his head to the sides, his neck bones cracking audibly. Besides that sound and steady hum of the buzzing lights, the room was eerie silent. Yet, Vulture didn't seem to be bored or well rested.

'Hello to you too, Hokage-sama.' he muttered and looked up at the blonde. His mask looked like the only thing not needing a wash up. He certainly stayed too long here without a proper cleansing. The arms moved along the neck straining, thin dust falling from them on the floor 'I'm a current guardian of the youngest child of Kazekage-sama. He is inside that crib, see?' he muttered, pointing at something that looked more like an oblong box, something that a kid would call a lego block, and a less understanding soul – a Christmas present without a colorful wrapper. In Suna, however, such things were taken for coffins and there was nothing to hide about that. It had an engraved sign of the kage family on the side; the only thing missing was the lid and a couple of nails holding it shut. Vulture let out a sigh and then stood up from the only chair in the room. It almost looked like a prisoner's cell – almost, because with the shape of the 'crib' it looked like if it was the room of grievance.

'I have no knowledge how to take care of such things when they're normal.' he muttered with somewhat flushed posture as he rubbed the back of his head 'And this… well, at least he is not trying to kill anyone…'

With that, he showed a small bottle of milk like if it held answers.

'If this goes on, he will starve to death.'

Not that he really, really minded… only that it was still problematic and he would rather survive the rage of the Kazekage, who seemed to be having mood swings from utter joy to the deepest depression he could muster without crumbling down or dancing from happiness. He didn't like the questionable mood that hanged around in the air too. Minato followed the hand direction, and, since the angles of the coffin-like structure didn't let him see anything, walked closer to inspect the baby.

'I see… And how does this relate to me being here, again?'

Because, so far it sounded like if he had just been showed into the jail-like room because everyone seemed to have suddenly forgotten how to feed a baby. And that surely couldn't be what they meant. It sounded just too ridiculous.

'You handled him well before?' said Vulture, hanging his arms helplessly. Seriously, he was at loss here, they all were. He wasn't sure what Kazekage was thinking when he said he had to get 'that Namikaze' here, but at least he hoped that was it. Because it seemed the man didn't know any special words or spells to undo it, so… he just didn't want to think it was desperation. Desperate leaders usually ended up in bad ideas. Like putting demons in little babies for example. 'You're the kage, if you don't know then who does?'

Inside the gruesome joke of a crib the very pale and very usual baby lied – however, this time, it wasn't crying or even reacting to anything – the movement, the smell the light or even the possible smell. He just lied there, just inside the centre of the box and starred at one of the walls.

'He reacts to the light…' muttered Vulture helplessly, moving one of the lamp slightly. The green pupil jumped lightly, getting away from it, but nothing else had happened 'But besides that…'

He didn't even end this sentence. The answer was pretty obvious.

Oh, the baby. Something wrong with the baby.

That seemed to be enough to jumpstart his brain back into working and he quickly walked to the crib and looked down at the little thing. Small and very red-haired, like before… only it now looked like a breathing doll which made it considerably less cute.

'Baby?' he snapped his fingers directly in front of him.

The redhead twitched lightly at the sound, but didn't even look at his fingers. Possibly uninterested, mostly not even moved by it.

'Okay, he does hear it, but doesn't react...' And that's as far as he got when it came to observation. He wished Tsunade-sensei was here. Not that she was any better with little kids, but at least she knew what they were made of in detail so she could fix them more easily. Apparently forgetting his previous promise regarding sticky Leafnin fingers and where exactly he went sticking them, he reached for the baby and made it sit up. The muscles felt a little tense, but not abnormally so.

'Come on baby, don't you remember me?' he said as he reached under the little redhead's arms and picked him up, cradling him close. 'And here I thought we had clicked so well.'

The redhead had only brushed his hand against the material, like if he didn't know what he was grasping and then let it go, completely not interested. He twitched once, when he briefly blinked and only kept starring at the wall.

'Look out!...' said the other nin, suddenly at alert 'The sand had ceased the movement now, we don't even know if it will catch him if there was something to happen!...'

Not that he cared for a baby that much… he was just alerted by the situation as a whole.

'Look, the only ones who think 'dropping the baby' is a national sport is you guys, not me.' Minato said not really paying attention as he carefully tried to move the baby's chin so he was looking at him. 'You don't have to worry about me tossing him around.'

The seal he had made wasn't going to last forever, but he doubted it would break all of the sudden. The force it had used to activate itself was directly proportional to the one the beats had been using to command the sandstorm. He wouldn't be surprised if the monster remained in it's slightly drugged state for another couple days. That reminded him…

'…this is going to sound a bit crazy, but you know the giant eyes popping all over the village? Have you seen any inside this specific room at any point?'

This time Vulture looked completely baffled.

'…what eyes?' he asked, looking at the man in the state of disbelief 'What are you talking about? I've been sitting closely to the demon for the whole time and I haven't seen the monk reacting for once. Only the kid had at some point stopped making a fuss and regressed to this weird state of… of…'

He moved his hands, wanting to show something, but instead he just flailed them up and down without adding anything to the topic.

'…shamanistic voodoo.' he said finally. It wasn't grasping the whole point of it, but at least some 'But he stopped singing somewhere around the midnight tonight. I'm not even sure what's going on out there and I don't know if I want to know, since everyone acts like if there was a disaster or something. I just want him to drink that milk.'

'No one told you?' Minato said as he kept trying to ineffectively catch the baby's eyes 'Your friends are dicks. Shukaku was tunneling below the northeastern district. When we sealed it off it started sinking, so we've been pulling people out since yesterday night. Your ANBU friends- the one I know of, at least are fine. Thorny Devil pulled her arm, but someone popped it back in place and she went right back to helping.' He touched the baby's forehead. It was normal temperature, as far as he could tell, maybe even a little cold. 'Did a medic look at him already?'

Vulture stopped in the mid of the gesture that was supposedly another crack of the neck and just kept starring at the blonde.

'Northeastern district?' he repeated like echo, then slowly moved his head to the door 'But… my home is there.'

It wasn't even a second after than when the bottle of milk was laying on the floor, both it and baby forgotten from the man's mind as he started fighting with the lock of the door.

'Let me out!' he screamed to who knows whom as there was no visible person around 'Why hadn't anyone told me anything? Let me out, or I'll wreck this place! I have to go home!'

With that, he pushed at the knob with the pressure of thin air, making it scrunch into a very grotesque, non-circular shape.

'…my friends, my family, my animals, my things, my money, my home, my life…' he kept muttering to himself at that. When the knob simply broke, not opening the door, he simply moved to one of the walls and executed the same jutsu, making the paint crack on all rooms on the walls. At this points the lamps in the room moved and the redhead jumped in Minato's arms like if someone had nicked at him and let out a scream – neither a sad or angry one, but surely negative one as he pushed at the man with all his body, obviously wanting to be out of the grasp. He didn't seem to be aware of the fact that there was only air and hard floor below him.

'Vulture-!'

Minato fumbled with the baby and caught it for the sole fact that he was used to handfuls of squirmy baby. Only his own weighted more than this one.

'Vulture, calm down!'

The man didn't seem to hear him as he executed the jutsu one more time, making the wall in front of him move forward, bending in a shape no wall should be able to stand if it wanted to support the ceiling. The lamps danced yet again and Gaara let out another, similar to the previous one, shout and moved sharply in the grasp, trying with all his might to get out.

Minato fought with the baby- it wasn't hard to overpower him, the problem is that he was terrified of accidentally breaking something. So he just put him back down on the crib and since Vulture intended to strike a friendship with the wall, he just pushed him against it, trying to keep him pinned.

'Vulture, I can get you out, okay?'

He didn't know. How was he supposed to know? No one told him anything. It would have been nice if maybe, he didn't know- Lark had told him 'Oh, hey, don't tell Vulture his home and everything that meant anything to him collapsed on itself, you'll sound like an ass and he'll flip'.

'Just calm down. I need to borrow chakra for it. I'll let go of you now.'

The man didn't move under the pinning, only kept on breathing quickly. It took him several seconds to finally slow down his breathing rate only a bit.

'…yes.' he said, sounding like a man in great hurry 'Please. Please… I need to go there.'

The lamps slowly stopped their dance. The paint fell on the floor in little snowy drops. Gaara stopped emitting sounds again. Minato nodded. He would be the last person to tell the other man something about the way he was reacting. And he also didn't like the way they had thrown them here without a way out.

'Okay, I'll do it. But I'm out of chakra. I need you to give me some. Then I'll get the baby and we all get out of here, all right?'

'I will give you it, but leave the kid here, he can't leave this room.' muttered the man, obviously not caring as much as he was supposed to. He was already gathering blue strings in his palms and he seemed to be doing that pretty quick. The lamps finally stopped their swinging and stabilized the brightness and shadows on the walls. Gaara still sat silenced, though after a moment, he seemed to be taking into another activity, and that was knocking on the wood. Vulture didn't seem to be the least touched by it.

'The baby leaves with me.' the blonde said a she extended a hand to receive it. 'If I get out, I don't know if I can get back in. We'll just be in the living room, that's where I left the marker.'

'You take the whole responsibility.' he said and pointed at the bottle of milk, now covered in sand, but decided to pass whatever he wanted to say about it. He just gave the man what he had from his remaining chakra. It seemed it was quite much for the state he looked like.

It took a moment for him to let the chakra work- it wasn't very pleasant. As it turned, Vulture worked with earth-based chakra, which Minato's own wind one wasn't very appreciative of. He picked up the bottle, went back to the crib to take the baby, and once he had both of these safely in his grip, reached to grab the vulture-masked ANBU.

'The worst cases are at the hospital.' he said quietly. 'Everyone else was gathered at the ANBU office and the rest at the center of the town.'

And then they were standing in the living room of the house, which save from the knocked over decorations seemed to have survived that scaled down end of the world dignifiedly.

'Thank you.' said the man – he didn't seem like if he understood half of what was said to him, but he indeed was thankful as he not only gripped the man's arm, but held it in a thankful grip for three long seconds. After that, he was gone, leaving the blonde with a redheaded baby and its bottle in the middle of the empty room. Gaara starred after him for a moment, then for a longer moment, and then it became apparent he was not even looking after him, only just starring at one general direction and by coincidence the men fled the same way. The new surroundings didn't do a thing to his usually curious self and he just kept on being quiet and unmoving.

Minato gave him a light smile, then looked after the empty spot he had been occupying for a few moments longer.

All right. Time to work on this.

No one had had time to fix the couch so it now consisted mostly of the mattress of it lying with the stuffing half gutted out of it. So Minato went to one of the individual ones, sat Gaara on it and gave it a critical look. Then removed the pillow on the back and carelessly tossed it to the floor.

Good. With the added space it was big enough the baby would require actual crawling to get out of it. Kneeling down in front of it so he was face to face with the doll-like infant, Minato grabbed the little hands and put his face close enough he had to be in the baby's field of vision.

'Baby?' he asked gently, then gave the hands a little squeeze. 'If you are looking around the village, come back. I'll play with you.'

The redhead only blinked, looking neither at the hand and at the man's face, more like at the spot between his nose and ear, known also as the left cheek. He blinked again – rather brief motion, adding nothing and changing nothing. The hands squeezed lightly on his hold and then loosened enough for them to fall down if Minato wasn't holding on them tight enough. It lasted for ten, maybe fifteen seconds. And then, like if someone had lit the light in the dark room, the browless skin above the eyes scrunched in the expression of sadness and the baby let out one short and rather crow-like cry of misery and fell back into the numb state again. His eyes shifted and looked at the man, this time capturing his gaze, but quickly loosing recognition. At the same time one big black eye opened above them on a wall, looked down and closed, like if they were just as interesting as everything else in this place.

Minato winced at the expression- what the hell was the monster doing? He suspected this was directly related to the voyeur act that the monster had going on all over the village, but why was it affecting the baby? The monster obviously could work independently of it's hosts eyesight.

Good news was that he now had means to talk to it.

He had enough cuts on him it took a small bite to reopen the one in his finger. In the wall, lines and points quickly formed the lines of old Sunian, elegant despite Minato's lack of practice on the smooth forms.

_One-tail Shukaku Come. answer __*THE TRUTH* to me._

There was a second, maybe two of silence, and then the eye opened back again on the same place, this time looking at Minato with much more focused attention than before. Along with three similar eyes a little lower and higher.

'Interesting one.' it wrote on the wall just above Minato's fingers. All three eyes blinked simultaneously.

'I've also been told I'm sweet and charming.' the blonde said with a big fake smile, moving a few steps back to check on the baby. It didn't seem to have moved.

'What did you do to him?'

The eyes blinked and just moved after Minato, their stare glued at him. Then, one eye closed. Nothing's happened. Now he missed Wren and his little notes. He hadn't figured all the symbols yet, so he wrote the ones he didn't know on the wall on standard sealing style, wincing against the abrasive surface against the broken skin.

_Reveal THE TRUTH of the Medium._

The eyes blinked, this time every one of them at their own time and then the wall started being covered in old ancient signs that held no recognizable meaning. At some point their stopped and sunk into the wall, smoothing it again, and then, a simplified picture of a baby Gaara was shown held in hands of oversimplified fat raccoon with stripes. Then the raccoon suddenly vanished and the baby was left alone in the place. Then drawings vanished and another eye closed, obviously bored with situation.

'Oh, come on…' the blonde sat down heavily on the floor, giving the wall a frustrated look 'I can't talk in scribbly-dotty that fast, do you have any idea how long it takes for me to even make out half of those signs?'

Not to mention most of them didn't seem like anything he had skipped over in the old seals. He should have taken a photo or something. That would have lasted didn't know if it would work, but he decided to try one of the symbols he had seen the most often in the seals that did work.

'هدنة'

A cease order.

The eyes blinked and got larger, like if they wanted to look at him closely, then one big question mark showed in front of Minato's face. A moment later, all walls, including the ceiling and the floor were covered in them. The face of the Second Kazekage emerged from the wall and looked at him with confusion.

'What do you want again?' he said in a deep rumbling voice.

If he hadn't been sitting, Minato would likely have fallen right on his ass. He knew who the man was- his face and features were a little too particular to confuse with someone else. Nidaime Kazekage- The

(first?)

(How old were these seals again?)

Ichibi's medium.

_It ate him. It ATE him, he was possessed and in the end he didn't die his SOUL was EATEN-_

Then the panicked shrieks inside of his head went into somewhat deafening silence. It took nearly a full minute before it tentatively started cooperating again with coherent thoughts, the first of which was an unsure _it can't take any shape…._

He wished it sounded more reassuring, but at least it was trying when the rest of his brain seemed to be happy in it's little pool of nightmare fuel.

'Baby back to normal?' he said, pointing at the little creature. '…please.'

The sand didn't respond, it had only melted into the pool of loose rock, making a hole in the wall. For a moment there was no reaction and then, the last one of all eyes closed, leaving Minato alone. Only then it could be visible that Gaara had actually taken interest in another activity, and this time it was repetitive swinging back and forth in the position he was seated in. It didn't look normal at all.

Minato sighed and leaned on the couch.

So… he got a wallfull of explanation that he literally couldn't catch a single word of (except for 'medium' and the beasts own name), some caveman style pics that didn't enlighten him on anything at all and now a baby that seemed to be utterly traumatized. So he did what anyone else in his state would have done. He started banging a fist against the wall, smearing blood on the command for the thing to appear and speak, each droplet of blood activating it over and over.

'What the hell did you do to the baby you goddamned monster!'

Suddenly two big eyes appeared above him, looking right at him, along with the line showing the mouth. Then, along with walls vanishing into suction, the face of the demon slowly started emerging out of the wall, along with fangs, the stripes that looked vaguely familiar on pictures, golden eyes and even a small nose that was never included anywhere. It stopped at the moment when the ceiling creaked weirdly, indicating that maybe it was time to fall down onto the floor.

And it waited.

Minato again fell on his ass out of sheer self preservation- the room was pretty big on normal circumstances. Having the whole ceiling cave in in raccoon shaped monstrosities ate much of that bigness. In fact, it suddenly made him feel cornered.

'Don't just look at me you failed plush with an eating disorder.' he managed to grit while he reached for the little redhead, cradling it close like some precious treasure he didn't want to share 'Answer me!'

The big line with fangs moved, making the dust fall from the ceiling.

'Pesky little creature of stubborn bones.' it spoke. The voice was deep, rumbling and indeed very booming, but it all came out muffled and very quiet, like if it was hidden six feet underground and silenced with dozens of pillows. Gaara suddenly moved to the side and opened his eyes impossibly wide. There was no hesitation, he immediately broke into tears, showing he was indeed lacking a whole lot of comfort. Blank yellow looked at him, something akin to thoughtfulness passing in them as a spark of emotion, but nothing more. The demon smiled, making the ceiling creak. 'Wrong questions won't give you answers.'

Gaara's cry grew more loud and desperate with every word. The monster looked at him again and slowly collapsed in itself, showing the figure of a Yashamaru-like woman, imitating the sign of 'shshsh'. Gaara didn't calm down, but his cry quieted also. The big face of a demon reformed back again, the expression full of unhealthy joy. It seemed to be more of entertainment for him than joy that he managed to lull Gaara somewhat.

'I do nothing.'

This was even worse. Because for a moment he wondered why the hell the monster was transforming into Yashamaru- because with the baby like this, he was sure Yashamaru was the one who had been first thrown headfirst into the room, moreso because unless he was mistaken, the man was a medinin. But then he realized Yashamaru wasn't so short or didn't have such nice rounded hips and then he felt quite a bit ill. He stroked the tiny back lightly.

'Allright. You are not doing anything.' he said, also more quietly than intended. 'Why is he like this?'

Black eyes blinked lazily, then moved to the side, seeming to be more interested in the design of the room. Indeed, a moment later a pair of small black eyes showed up on the ceiling and started observing some crook on the carpet from there, like if it was something too interesting to not watch. Only when they disappeared the demon looked back at Minato.

'Nobody is interested.' he answered, making Gaara cry louder again. It seemed that the fact he tried to speak disturbed the redhead enough to put him into hysterics. 'I can't be interested, I watch the paths collapse.'

'Fascinating.' the blonde grumbled over the baby's cry. 'But let's pretend for a second I don't speak crazy. Explain to me why he is acting like this!'

The demon looked at Minato, then the smile of it widened.

'I answered your question, stupid creature.' he said and slowly emerged back into the wall 'But because you're interesting, I'll answer again.'

Then, when the missing walls formed again, it seemed they came with additional things – faces of currently deceased people, including masks of ANBU and recent mortal damages made in the sinking of the village. All of them suddenly moved and started chanting in different voices, all an obvious memory than current voice – walls couldn't speak even if they wanted to.

'I'm so lonely.' 'Please, take me out of here!' 'Where's aunt?' 'Don't kill me, don't kill me, don't kill me!' 'I'm so lonely.' 'Look at me!' 'Please.' 'Look at me!' 'I'm so lonely.' 'Where's aunt?' 'Don't kill me, don't kill me, don't kill me!' 'Please.' 'Touch me for the last time…' 'Care for your sister…' 'Please.' 'Where's aunt?'

…and all the same of that, over and over again, all voices needy and questioning, making a choir of something no sane human would want to listen to. Strangely, Gaara calmed down during them, watching the ceiling with opened eyes, then he slowly started swinging back and forth, slightly hitting Minato with his forehead and yowling along with the tune of the insanity.

The blonde's face had gone from confusion to ashen horror, and then he had curled in a little ball with the little redhead cradled tightly on the center. He didn't want this. None of this had been his fault!

_B__ut you don't believe that, do you….?_

'Stop it.'

The wailing faces slowly drowned into the walls, quieting down. Gaara didn't seem to notice and just kept on singing in the tune for a few more moments before he fell silent. The swinging didn't cease though. One black eye opened on the wall, observing him, then looking at the fly.

'Satisfaction?' wrote on the wall.

Minato wrote a single word in the floor next to him. A word that had appeared so many times on the seals without it being connected to any sort of order or request of any kind he hadn't understood the meaning of until Wren translated for him.

'تجديف'

The eye had squinted, most likely from joy – or maybe just some sort of recognition and pushed the word onto the floor on a thin layer of sand, like if he wanted to cut it out. Under it, there was another sign.

الحياة

After that, Shukaku vanished again.

Minato waited, not because there was anything specific to wait for- he just wanted the beast gone, and apparently the thing was only too happy to go watch people agonizing it considered him uninteresting enough.

It was only after several minutes of eerie near silence barely interrupted by the soft sounds of the baby that he slowly unfolded, leaning back so he could look at him.

Gone.

The baby was somewhere else entirely, he wasn't staring *at* anything he was just staring.  
But he could hear things. He had reacted to his snapping of fingers, he had reacted to Vulture making the room start to crack, and he had… Reacted to the monster and what he had done. If the monster was doing something to the baby mentally, why would he bother doing outside stimuli?  
Unless he just wanted to freak Minato out. Knowing the monster, it wasn't entirely out of question that he would do that.

That was too bleak a thought and essentially a dead end, so he discarded the idea entirely. He absently put the bused finger in his mouth so he could lick the blood and sand off it while he tried to figure out the more positive scenery.

He had asked the Bijuu several times what he had done to Gaara, and all he had gotten was 'nothing' out of it. At least the first time he had to be telling the truth- the seal wouldn't have allowed it to lie. But then something had to have happened, from what little he had gotten out of the ANBU nanny, Gaara had gone into this… semi-autistic state around the same time that the monster had been stranded.  
He had initially thought it was just a matter of the beast looking at so many things at the same time being maybe too much for the baby to handle, but the more he thought about it, the more that theory died on itself.

Because when the monster appeared, Gaara still hadn't reacted. If for some reason he had gone blind and was looking though the Bijuu's eyes, he should have seen Minato. And sure, maybe the baby wasn't very appreciative of his person after what he had done, but… he still should have shown some reaction in _some_way to him.  
He winced as he bit down on a particularly though sand grain, his skin complaining at the abrasion as his eyes drifted to the walls looking for some sort of clue.

There was the command to summon the creature and for him to speak without lies, but liar or not, he didn't think he could handle another round of what had just happened. Not now, not anytime soon.

There was the second one, ordering to tell the truth about the medium. Just one long block of complicated text and some drawings- and so Minato looked around for some papers he could use to write it down, simply because that's what he did. Sometime seeing the things on paper helped him and with how stressed he was, it probably helped.

What had the monster done again?

The text he had no hope of remembering. He had good visual memory, but to him the scribbles and dots looking all practically the same. Maybe if Wren had been there it would have been different.

Then there had been two silly pics, first baby with giant Shukaku, then baby alone.

His rendition of them was a bit more artistic, complete with the monster's tongue lolling out in the most retarded of expressions, but other than that, he just stared at it blankly without so much as an ilk as to what he was missing there.

Baby with monster.

Baby without monster.

What else had the thing said? Something about being unable to pay attention because he was out watching the world collapse or something. Vulture had said that Shukaku hadn't bothered to check on Gaara. Eyes were everywhere, though. Maybe the monster didn't need Gaara's visual aid, but it certainly needed to use it's own- and he was getting off on a tangent here. His mind was just too scrambled for focus.

Baby with raccoon.

Baby without raccoon.

Shukaku hadn't done anything and was outside watching them like one would do an ant farm and thus wasn't doing anything to baby…

Baby in the company of fatass.

Baby without … company?

_(I will show you again)_ it said. Tied by the command to speak the truth.

Screams. A looped choir of people's last thoughts and words- pleas and begs for help.

_(I will show you)_

Show him… what? He frowned lightly, leaning back on the floor until his back hit the couch and lightly rubbed one of the baby's arm in a comforting gesture.

_Blasphemy_

The second Kazekage wrote all over most of the seals, and it was a strange thing, because it had a seal equivalent. None of the modern seals had such a symbol because it didn't serve any purpose- so it had to be just a word to describe the monster. Minato could see why. And yet…

_Life_ the raccoon had argued. And that probably was also true- such was the life of the Ichibi, blood and murder and dying screams- it wasn't a life meant for humans-

Blue eyes widened a fraction as an idea slowly started forming- something abstract and strange and… no, it couldn't be.

_Blasphemy_

Maybe for a human. Maybe for a man that had once been human so he knew that wasn't how one was supposed to live… But what was it like for a baby who had lived like with it since the moment he drew his first breath? He looked at the picture of the baby on the paper. He had used half of it for the first one and the other half for the second image. The second half dwarfed the baby in it's emptiness. A very big, very empty room.

What was it like for a tiny baby who was much smaller than he should have been because he wasn't allowed to be properly fed? A baby that lived in a little jail of one room with bright lights and bad smells and expressionless masks with only his father looking remotely human when he felt like looking at him. A baby who was never talked to or held to the point he didn't seem to know quite well enough how to balance his little body like a normal baby his age should but knew enough to send his pet monster after him a lot further than any of them had been expected- because he wanted him back that much.  
A baby who lived with it every waking moment because all his moments were made of wakefulness.

Maybe it was a baby who only had the voice of the monster to keep him company for it's almost-year of life.

'Oh. Oh, baby.'

Was the baby traumatized? Had he just… shut down from fright at the sudden silence?  
What did you do with a traumatized thing this size? Minato had dealt with people who shut down from fright during battle- and had been on the receiving end of it at least twice. But ninja were pragmatic people. You usually got slapped until you broke out of it and started slapping back, at which point you were considered fit to go right back to 'work'.  
He couldn't slap the baby until he snapped out of it. And he wasn't even sure this was the right thing to do, this was pure wild guessing based on the riddles of a thing that was admittedly missing quite a few ducklings on the line.

'Little Red…?'  
No answer.

Hadn't they had some class on how to treat people under shock sometime in academy? He couldn't remember anything of it. He had probably been reading a book under the desk or something. He had no option but to improvise. Asking a Sunanin about such delicate emotional matters would have been as useful as discussing proper dinner etiquette with their local monstrosity, even if 1/6 of their village had been plowed several floors underground.  
He went to the kitchen to get some water and wasn't really surprised to find nothing but a faint stream of reddish water come out of the pipes. But no worries, the royal family had a well of drinkable water all of their own, so that's where he went to get the water. He filled the kettle with it and put the rest on the fridge to chill.  
Baby had expressed interest in mint tea before and Naruto liked to sniff it like crazy, so he started brewing some tea stronger than usual so the minty scent would hopefully permeate enough to… well. Do something. What else could he do?  
'Okay baby… I have no idea what I'm doing, so work with me here.' he said, sitting down, turning Gaara around so he was looking at him and once again taking the little redhead's hands on hips and petting the back of his palms with his thumb gently. 'I'm going to tell you a story now, and I kind of can't remember it word for word, so I'm going to make it up for padding on the go. This is the story of the gusty ninja, unauthorized version by Namikze Minato. Once upon a time…'

The redhead listened to it wordlessly. He wasn't doing much – both by gesturing and moving point. Sometimes his pupils would move to the side at the sound, occasionally he would blink – but beside that, he didn't seem to be changing much. It took Minato literally to get to the very end of a very long story when he twitched and something resembling a handful of dust thrown by a wind hit the man directly on the face. It resembled much more powerful movements but it surely wasn't the original. When the man wasn't thrown to the opposite wall, Gaara moved his head to the side and started sobbing. He seemed to be too exhausted to even cry loud at this point. Another portion of dust slashed at the glass with mint tea, making it budge and stain the table under it, then it went further and started hitting random objects of furniture fulfilling the room, not avoiding Minato if he was on the way. The redhead kicked at the air once, twice and stilled, continuing to wail under his nose.

By the second hour Minato wasn't telling a story as much as listening to someone with his voice and accent telling it. He had no idea where it was coming from (he certainly didn't remember remembering so much detail of the book, or the more colorful adaptations of parts). He was too tired to care though, and at points he'd found himself leaning on the table, the narrative becoming more of a lulling droning than actual storytelling until he realized he was about to fall asleep and forced himself to get back into an upright position.  
He had no idea how long her was there, the only way to measure time passing in such enclosed quarters was his internal clock, which still wasn't used to the sun setting down at eight in the afternoon. All he knew was the heat was again going from 'hot' to 'suffocating' and so hopefully it would go to some blissful 'chilly' in some other three hours. Or six.  
But still, no one had come here to check on them or give orders or so much as yell at him for taking the baby out of the locked room, and that put him at unease. Surely nothing worse could have happened outside, right? He tried to shake the thought that maybe he had sneezed at the wrong time and missed the end of the world, which was so ridiculous it was absolutely terrifying.

The worst part was that the more time he spent here the more he started wondering what was keeping the mad raccoon so entertained- surely watching people slowly suffocating to death while shinobi tried to rescue them couldn't be that entertaining. What else could keep its attention away from its precious host, who could easily be in a torture chamber with Minato himself performing a vivisection on him for all the monster seemed to care?

Maybe he was so entertained looking at other things he had just forgotten Gaara was there. Things like small blonde babies who grew at abnormal rates because their chakra was arranged completely differently from a normal humans. His baby, for kept telling himself there was no way for the monster to know, but in this house, all alone and with nothing with a little baby-like doll who barely bothered to twitch every now and then, it was hard. It was a very hard thing to do.

He was nearing the end of his patience and had actually gone as far as to promise himself he would finish the story and go- he didn't care if he had to leave the baby with a clone for that, he needed to know what was going out outside before he went _mad_ - when the first swap of sand hit him. It didn't manage much besides making him sneeze, and he probably would have overlooked it if it hadn't been because it then proceeded to hit the teacup with enough strength to make its contents sway.

'…baby, are you doing this?' the little redhead just burst into tears in a yet even more creepy quiet way, fat tears spilling down pale cheeks. Wind and loose sand started pushing at random things in the room in the most ineffective of ways.

'Little Red, are you- damn it!'

This time when he tried to pick the baby back up the little body bent in that almost-unnatural shape only small children seemed to accomplish when they absolutely didn't want to be picked up. At the same time more loose sand scratched the tender skin of his cheek making him wince.

'Gaara- baby, stop this right now, please.' was the Bijuu doing this? There were no eyes in the room, none that he could see at least. And by all means it should still be stranded, right? Did the baby do this on it's own? If so, how? At this moment Minato would have gladly killed someone to see how exactly did anyone work the bonding seal into the baby. This couldn't be what they had intended all along.

'Gaara-' he let go of the baby when yet another gust made his whole face feel like if someone had thought throwing tiny needles at it was a great idea. At least when he wasn't touching him the baby didn't squirm so violently, but it still seemed to be pushing against the things in the room. Soon something would crack.

He had the uncomfortable feeling it would be himself.

'What am I doing here?' he heard himself moan, reaching for the baby again and having to clutch it close to keep it from flailing right off his hold. 'I'm not supposed to be here…'

Only he had nowhere else to be and he couldn't leave. Ignoring the way the loose sand kept trying to attack his face and make his eyes tear up, he moved back to the living room, moving to one of the corners where he could at least try to hide from it.

'Baby, please stop.' he said hoarsely, pulling the little redhead to his chest, protecting him from the worst of the sand with his body 'Do you want me to beg? I'm begging. I don't know what to do. I don't know what you want and I don't know how to make it better, but I'm _trying_ and I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know anything. I- I need help.'

And knowing there wasn't anyone to give it to him- knowing he was essentially alone and there was nothing he could do to make things right, to make a difference of any sort tore at him.

'Someone help me. Please.'

But there wasn't anyone out there to help him. Somehow, the room kept on staying empty for another hour, unobserved and unprotected. No ANBU had showed up on the desperate call as all of them were listening to more desperate calls on the other side of the town – and the only guardian who could do anything, fled there to mourn over his loses. Kazekage also didn't show up as he was still busy on the meeting with council, and pretty much unaware of the situation, and no other persona seemed to have interest in even coming close enough to be hearable. The sand kept on eating over everything, but as the time passed by it started concentrating on Minato specifically – Gaara seemed to be on the great unease he was still being held by a man, his cries growing louder and more accusatory as he twisted in his grasp, trying to push and kick his way out of the man's hold. They were still weak in comparison to what he could have sported before, and his pink face and eyes seemed to show the extreme tiredness with the whole situation. He was far from sleepy though.

Minato didn't let go though- he wasn't sure if the sand would try to attack the baby if he did, accidentally or otherwise, and he wasn't about to maybe test that theory. There was no use in constructing any sort of thing to protect himself, so instead he just grabbed the blanket that had somehow survived mostly entirely Shukaku's attack the few days ago and covered both himself and Gaara with it, managing to at least keep the worst of the this from further irritating his face even though he had the feeling some deep scratches had been left by now.

He worried about the baby not having eaten, and he hoped that being a jinchuuriki would mean he also had heightened endurance without food, because save from putting an IV on him, Minato had no idea how to coerce him into eating. He'd be contented with the baby just stopping crying. In the end he curled closely to the little redhead and started singing something soft and tired in a language no one spoke in anymore because the village that used it had disappeared over fifteen years ago.

'Bittida en morgon innan solen upprann

Innan foglarna började sjunga

Bergatrollet friade till fager ungersven

Hon hade en falskeliger tunga...'

He wasn't sure if the baby heard him over the sound of the sand inside of the house, but that didn't really matter either.

It was only closing to an evening when the redhead finally stopped squirming, becoming apathetic toward Minato's touch also. The sand's leashes of anger stopped also with his waning interest – but he did everything to face away to the wall. When Minato kept on singing the song for the umpteenth time, Gaara slowly took in the tune and started swinging to the melody, his gaze empty and dislocated. After some time even that stopped – the redhead simply stilled and kept on starring at Minato's shirt and blanket around them. After five long minutes of gaping at nothing, he blinked – and didn't open his eyes this time.

That led to immediate reaction of few things at once – first, all sand had rose above the floor level and stilled in the air, then a black eye opened above them on the wall – and was quickly followed by hundredths if not thousand eyes that opened on every available space, covered in sand, including the sand above the floor level. Then big mouth showed up and smiled at him.

'You suck at singing.' they said and all eyes closed beside two biggest ones. The bland yellow in them slowly started swirling and taking the gold-gold color, shining.

Minato felt like if he had woken up from a bad genjutsu- maybe even a never-ending nightmare that had given up on him just when he was. He felt dizzy and tired and vaguely nauseas, and he wasn't thinking quite right- at any other time he probably would have recognized these symptoms of dehydration, but at the moment all he could think was how his skin crawled at the feeling of bloodthirsty chakra slowly gathering again.

Even that was something odd and muted and far away, and he barely could bring himself to care. He pulled the blanket out, shaking loose sand from his hair and looked down at the baby, who was nestled softly against his chest. Sleeping.

There. That was it.

' …men nu så är du det värsta bergatroll, af Neckens och djävulens stämma.' he said quietly. Then pinched the baby's arm, hard enough to jolt him awake.

' _But I know you are the worst mountain troll __from the spawn of the neck and the devil'_

The baby jolted in his grasp with a painful meep and immediately started crying again. The golden slowly bled out of the eyes as they frowned over the mouth that blended into the wall.

'…utom du er den förbanna en.' he muttered and looked at the child. Gaara, surprisingly, looked back. 'Jag er uttråkad med mat. Underhålla jag, unge.'

And with that the eyes had closed, letting the hanging sand fall on the floor. A moment later it started crawling up Minato's legs and arms until it had reached to the kid's skin. There had the eye opened on it again.

'Bittida en morgon innan solen upprann.' it said mockingly, repeating the tune, and it vanished. Gaara's eyes sprung open and he let out a shout of surprise, and then… started coughing. It seemed to be painful, as at every pause in-between, the kid would only start crying over again.

'Hello baby,' the older man said softly, leaning ahead and rubbing his forehead tiredly to the crown of messy red strands. 'Welcome back.'

Gaara had looked at him with surprised, bewildered stare, as if he saw him for the first time, then let out something of a needy and tearful shout as he didn't really stop crying. This time, however, he moved his head back so he could stare at Minato's face directly and clutched his hands over his shirt tightly.

Minato smiled lightly. Despite everything, he could read recognition on the baby's gaze and it made worth everything that had happened.

'Yeah… I missed you too.'

There was no one to extract him from the sand this time, so he had to do it himself, wasting what little chakra he had left and somehow refraining from fainting, even if he did actually get dizzy enough when he stood up he fell down, landing painfully on his shoulder and barely keeping from hitting the baby.

'Sorry. I'm sorry, love.' he gasped quietly, breath too fast for just a stupid fall. He could hear his heart beating inside his skull and it made him feel rather unwell, but he still had things to do and he couldn't just lie on the floor like an unimaginative carpet.


	9. 9 number

It took a lot longer than Minato would have liked and mostly included following the walls and heavily leaning on them, but he managed to get back to the kitchen. He had to sit on the kitchen table for a few minutes. It was there that he saw the baby's bottle. It was also pure luckk he thought of inspecting it closer before just giving it to him, because in the countless hours it had been laying there the milk had gone past sour. In fact thinking adjectives of what it had turned into would have been enough to make him gag, even without the smell, and he threw it away before he lost… whatever his stomach was thinking he had eaten. Instead he dove for the cabinet where he had seen a few clean bottles and just filled one with about 1/4th of water, quickly covering it and giving it to the baby while it was still faintly coolish.

'Here, love. I know you are hungry, but have a bit of water first, okay?'

The redhead grabbed the bottle, twisting a bit in his hold, as he did his best to catch the bottle and not let go of Minato at the same time. He succeeded, at least a bit with it as he still had one hand in the material and other on the bottle. Once the dummy went to his mouth, however, he quieted down and started drinking greedily, starring at Minato with still faintly pinkish eyes. They held admiration already – it seemed that even after all he went through he couldn't really stay unhappy at the blonde for longer than a few milliseconds. But after a moment the water stopped fulfilling his needs as he simply let go of the bottle and looked at the man with widely opened eyes and mouth.

'Awawaaaa—' he almost yelled at the blonde, then flailed his free hand before starting to sniff again. It looked almost like if he was accusing him of trying to sell him 'false' water for food.

'There you go~' Minato cooed in the same soft tones from before, because he honestly couldn't seem to be able to raise his voice to a normal level. Not as much as he would have liked, but at least he had wet his throat. He nuzzled the baby instead 'Good baby. Let's find something for you to eat.'

This time he found the bottles of donkey milk (the less he thought about it the better for him) and with some effort sat up in the counter. That way he could get the warmed up milk without having to move around too much. The good news was that in the desert things didn't really take too long to warm up. He didn't even wait for it to get hot, just a bit above room temperature, and then he was giving it to the little redhead, relieved by his enthusiasm for some sort of nourishment.

'At least you don't think I sing bad, do you?' he sighed quietly, leaning back until he hit the wall, eyes closing tiredly '…everyone's a critic.'

'…I think criticism is well forwarded if you keep on making mistakes.'

In the door of the kitchen, stood Yashamaru. This time he was fully clothed in jounin uniform, along with the bee hive-like cap and cover on the mouth. Only a tone of voice could indicate he was somewhat less manly than he looked like – even his fingers looked brute in the gloves and dust. He smelled of sun, sand and blood, but what was mostly noticeable was sweat and bloody bandage over his left arm 'I don't know who allowed you to bring this shit out of his room at the time like this, but you could be out there trying to help us all in this critical time instead of playing a fail of a nanny, Hokage-chan.'

And with that, he simply came closer and tore the bottle out of baby's mouth, making Gaara cry out for it. He didn't seem to be touched by this or the fact that Gaara started to cry all over again.

'I don't know if you're aware of the fact there's a catastrophe going on outside-' continued the man, as he opened the bottle and threw the contents to the closely standing empty glass '…but a group of ANBU decided to try to be smart and they made some sort of a seal that made half of the town collapse under its own weight. Isn't this wonderful? Isn't it?' With that he flailed the bottle filled with water to some weird measurement that seemed to be more of a 64% or 78% instead of normal halves and squares at the baby. Gaara reached out for it, crying for the bottle to be given to him, but Yashamaru took it away, opening the fridge and taking the milk out 'A help of someone who says was strong would be nice, but no, someone decided to play a good guardian of a baby monster… which should be locked in his room. Where's his guarding soldier and why are you here again anyway?' he asked and swirled the bottle carelessly, holding it like if it was covered in something nasty.

'Oh, we're being naaauuughtyyy, right?' he muttered at Gaara who looked up at him, but seemed to be more concerned about the fact Yashamaru was still holding the bottle 'If Kazekage-sama knows about this he will be informed about the mess in the living room anyway. You do everything to just make my life miserable, aren't you?'

And with that, he gave the kid the bottle – at least this time with proper care, making sure that Gaara didn't choke on it. He brushed his thumb over Gaara's nose also.

'Aren't you, right? Little horrible abomination.'

Gaara had only closed his eyes, but he was visibly interested in the caress, just as much as he was in the nuzzle he was given from Minato before. Yashamaru took off his face cover, revealing an ugly bruise on the cheek and smiled at both of them.

'Screw you both.' he cooed at them – more at Gaara, who took it all like a sponge – and left the room, more in a manner of an angry drama queen than tired soldier. Minato would have liked to answer with something smart, something witty (maybe comment he couldn't possibly have found time for it between learning to play the fiddle and painting his toenails). At the very least he would have liked to raise a middle finger, but he had to settle with channeling the inner Uchiha to it's utmost level of accuracy. He 'hn'ed at the blonde in a way that would have made Fugaku proud. He didn't really have energy to do much else either way, so it was just his luck such an answer was good on its own.

He didn't want to think about what the mednin had said- hell, he didn't even want to bother with mentally correcting him. He didn't even seem to be able to manage to care enough to hope he had irritated the other, and his brain was only too happy to provide him with all the 'please stand by' lack of actual work it could. Baby was happy with his bottle, too. Everything was all right in the then the door opened again, revealing Yashamaru's face, this time without a cap and healing his own cheek.

'And by the way, you stink of sickness. Go away before you make someone important sick.'

Minato didn't bother to open his eyes. He didn't think it was the best moment for the younger (older?) man to be playing funny, when he tried to speak his tongue felt, well… pasty.

'…sick with what?'

'I don't know, can't tell much more from the distance beside the fact you seem to be overheated and two steps from collapsing from dehydration. Drink that milk or I will have to throw it away.' said the blonde and smiled at him 'And then leave.'

Dehydration. Ha. Overhearted. Ha! Crazy words spoken by a crazy person. It was the desert. There was no such thing not overheated, he was perfectly fine, just… tired. Because this had been a very sad week. Very taxing, indeed.

He looked at the milk. It looked back at him.

'…if I drink that I'll make an even bigger mess of your kitchen, Yashamaru-san, but thank you.' he made a move as if he were about to get up- only to slump right back against the wall when what little drive he could muster died at the face of his repeated problem. '…I don't suppose you feel like taking the baby.'

'I'm not laughing at your jokes.' said Yashamaru as he slowly undid the upper part of his vest, not ungluing his hand from his face for once 'And don't make me French kiss you with that milk, it's something you wanted to give to the baby, so you should have no problem with drinking it.' And with that he opened the vest to the end, still holding his hand at the same place. Gaara eyes his every move, only to meep at the sudden tug of the gravity that Minato let him take him down. His gaze shifted to him and he tried to catch him on the material of the shirt with one hand, but he only managed to let go of the bottle and let it fall down on earth.

Yashamaru smiled at that.

'I bet you're immobile now. Kazekage-sama will be thrilled.' and with that, he had vanished behind the door again. If he had had the tiniest bit more of energy, Minato would have burst out laughing. He doubted that, form the very long list of things he had done this week that had a possibility to thrill the Kazekage, collapsing on his kitchen would be anywhere close to the top. He wasn't even sure if it would make it to the 'top 100 list' at all. In fact, now that he thought about it, it was better for him to stay there anyway. Chances were the moment he got to his house the man would call him back, so… better for him to stay there. And wait for him.

He looked at the milk again and made a face-it wasn't that he had anything personal against the milk (which he did, but as a shinobi, he had actually eaten worse. Mostly cooked by his own genin team). It was that he knew he would be sick if he had any of that thing. It took him fifteen minutes to get down the counter, pick the bottle and give it back to the baby, put the milk glass on the refrigerator and serve himself a glass of water. The cool liquid revived him a bit, but he strangely didn't really feel like having more than that, and he had to force himself to finish even that.

It was all time he was given to enjoy with the redhead and his starring. Gaara used them up thoughtfully, as he simply seemed to take joy in just being close to Minato and the bottle of milk. He also tried to mumble about something to him at one point – and that 'something' was a fly that sat on the wall, something rather rare in Gaara's life at any given moment, but since the man seemed to be out of it too much, he simply cuddled up closer and kept on sucking the bottle dry. He was still shaken by what's happened lately and only now he was getting used to the fact that things were setting back to normal. After that, the door to the kitchen opened, revealing the red-haired father of the toddler, seeming to be somehow a color or two more tanned than he was in the morning. The red make up he had applied to his eyes was now so runny he looked like if he cried bloody tears. In the state he was in, he looked like he as well could've.

'Why are you Konohanins all so stubborn, stupid and out of your mind?' he half asked, half shouted, then basked his hand at something that looked like a handful of dust out of nowhere 'And to add to the fact you had sneaked out from Gaara's room, managed to get rid of Vulture's body as I can't find him anywhere and messed up the living room you're now getting sick and attached to that monstrosity again! Is there even brain in this skull can of yours?'

He let out a breath, then another and then swapped away another portion of dust flying at his face. Then he closed his eyes and let out his breath a bit slower. It would look calming, if it wasn't for the fact the dust hit him in the middle of doing it.

'…at least this brat is back to normal.' he muttered, smudging his face out of sand 'I simply detest the fact I don't even know what to do with you. I should prison you in basement for your stupidity and behead for everyone who died. Do you have any proposition how would I do that without losing your valuable side?'

'You could kill me and have me impersonated by someone else.' the blonde answered morosely, opening his eyes to look at what the man was doing with more or less the same interest Gaara had held for the insect. He didn't know one took make up off with dust. 'You probably could get away with it for a year or two without anyone noticing.' With how often they would come to check? At the very least two, if not five. '…won't be nice when they do find out, though.'

And given how Konoha was more or less the only village who wasn't actively hostile to so much as naming Suna, that would be a big deal.

'I'm sorry it turned like this. It wasn't what I meant, but I guess that doesn't make much of a difference.' he cuddled the baby closer automatically, taking comfort in what pretty much was the only positive presence around him. How sad.

'If it makes you feel better, there would have been a lot more deaths if we hadn't. I don't know what the raccoon was waiting for, but that place sunk up because the holes underneath were already there and… I don't know. I don't know why was it holding them up. Maybe he was waiting for more people to be there so he could… gobble them all up at the same time.'

Dulled blue closed again. Dingo had said something about the wind changing. Maybe it had been that. Maybe.

'Maybe it was waiting for you to see it.'

The redhead only put his hands up, only to put them down at the same time. He had no answer to this as nobody really knew what was the deal with it not sinking sooner, but everyone kept on holding to the hope it wouldn't sink if they all wouldn't mess with it any more than they already did. He was too tired to argue though and the blonde seemed to lose his brain cells in a very quick tempo, so there was no point in even trying to. It didn't mean he wasn't angry, he just… couldn't take it now. Why was the man getting attached to the kid so much anyway.

'You took the brat out of his room. It could have resulted in your death and all those around you.' he said, swapping away yet another fistful of dust 'Why did you do that?'

'It didn't matter.' the blonde said in the same apathetic tone from before. 'He couldn't have hurt a fly, the monster-' he made a vague gesture with a wrist, even though he didn't point at anything specific. 'It left him alone.'

This wasn't exactly accurate and he wished he could explain it better, but he knew the redhead's type. He wanted certainties and specifications and if he so much as hinted to the fact he was _supposing_ that the bay had gone into a brief period of…_autism_ out of shock from suddenly losing a myriad of dying voices (courtesy of Shukaku-o vision), all he'd manage was to scare him more, so he'd get angrier and alienate the baby even worse. He looked down at the baby, who seemed to have refund his necklace and was again nibbling on it with his toothless mouth. He smiled and stroked a soft, lily-white cheek.  
No, he couldn't explain such things to the Kazekage. He wouldn't understand them. He wouldn't even want to.

'It did what?' Kazekage bellowed, losing his cool in the blink of an eye 'It left Gaara alone? And where to? For almost six months all we do is trying to keep the mad monk in one place and now you suddenly let it out to roam wherever it likes and it's supposed to be good? Do you even know what does it mean?'

It was enough for him to bend down and grasp the collar of the blonde and to lift him up by that, despite the baby making a vague noise of protest.

'Things don't vanish into thin air! If you let it out making it move from under the ground then it means you're responsible for what's happened and there's no way I'm not charging you for this!'

Minato flinched - more at the tone than anything else- automatically shifting the baby to the side so he wouldn't have to bear with the worst of his kind of threatening looking father face first. At least now he wouldn't have to worry about getting up by his own means, wonderdaddy had helped him with that quite nicely, and all he had to do was straighten himself, which again left him some comfortable inches taller than the man, even if he didn't let go of his collar yet. And their faces were kinda close. Actually, the man looked more panicked than angry, or at least the anger was clearly panic born. There were tension lines all over his face and for some reason it suddenly occurred to him that this man wasn't really that much older than he himself was. It was an odd, disconnected thought that made him feel vaguely uncomfortable, so he pushed it away and blinked at the redhead slowly.

'…your voice makes my headache sad.' he finally said, then busied himself with gently prying the fingers off his collar one by one. After getting the material right, he realized he was just as close to the other as he had been and took a half step back, shifting directions for the chairs by the table and making a gesture for the other to follow. 'I'll try to explain. I take you didn't talk to wren much about what we did.'

The redhead followed, though not without hesitation. He saw that the man was not holding himself up very well – so it was possible for him to mix facts – but then, it was also possible for him to forget them later. There were still a lot of plotholes here – the especially urgent one being the fact that wren was currently sealed and imprisoned under the judgment of revealing the secrets of the highest level and importance to the outsider (currently living in the place, but still outsider). The council wouldn't let him go if he didn't do that and he had to play quick and hard in the matter – there was no time for questions of any kind. As much as he counted as the highest ranked person, his knowledge was still minimal to what he should have known. He tossed the glance to the pretty much unhappy kid, making uneven noises into the jounin vest. The reason of his all worries. He felt remorse.

'It'd better be worth my time.' he muttered as he sat down, his hands propped up in a basket. 'Speak up.'

The blonde sighed, obviously stressed by the situation, before shrugging helplessly. He didn't know how to explain for it to make sense. He supposed he could just explain and when he started sounding insane the redhead would only be too happy to interrogate him further into the right track.

'I don't know when the storm started.' he said as he sat Gaara sideways on his lap, arms loosely wrapped around him to keep him in place. 'When I woke up my summon told me it had been going for a full day and that the thing was eating people alive-' he almost stopped, as if he expected the redhead to correct him on this. When he did it, he made a face and continued.

'And I didn't know what to do, so I had the alphabet you gave me, so I... I tried to make a seal to make it stop-' and now the blonde just looked plain uncomfortable, almost ashamed of it 'And I know, I know, I know it sounds stupid, but that's what I do, that's what I'm good at. So I did this … long, long seal that was a mess, and I took it to Wren because I thought he'd know. And he didn't, he only told me I had one hundredth eight mistakes.'

Gaara gave a tug on one of the cylinders of his necklace, startling the blonde for a moment. He looked at the redhead as if he wasn't sure how such a thing had ended on his lap, then reached for it and pulled it off, wrapping it a few times around his hand before offering it to the baby.

'And that was it. If it was wrong, it wouldn't work. And I thought of going back home, but then I thought if I had the real thing I could make it work. And Wren was all 'I can't, I can't, I don't know if lord and Master will allow it-' so I told him he could just seal my memory if that made him happy, so he finally gave me the seals. And we spent…' he gestured with his hand again, the silver pieces jingling enticingly for the baby. 'Half a day, maybe more. Fixing it. There was this one- I don't know what's the name. At the beginning I wanted to seal it, but it would require dozens, maybe even hundreds of sacrifices. The seal you use, that is, I wanted something that required less chakra, and there was this broken seal- it looked like this, but I don't remember the name. It looked like this. It looked like this-'

He made quick lines on the table with his finger, showing the one he meant.

حرام

'And that was really strong. There was no way he could deny that, but it still required too much chakra, so I thought- I thought if I could just use a normal seal for absorption, I could use the things own chakra and make it stop. I made a seal that ordered it to stop in place. And… there's no real translation for the word. Stop it from craving human flesh. And that's what it did. The thing stayed immovable in place only gaping at stuff. That's why it wasn't with Gaara. It could come back- it could be everywhere it was at the time it activated because that's how big its chakra network was, it just didn't bother because he thought outside was more interesting. Then the seal spent itself and Shukaku came back and Gaara acted normal again. And that's it.'

The redhead had only looked at the blonde after that. It was a long, long silence. Gaara managed in it to grasp the silver cylinders and suck on them thoroughly, then to lose interest and stare back at his own father. Daichi also looked at the baby, not entirely giving it his attention, but not swaying from it. He did slap away dozen of sand trying to get to his ear though.

'There's so many 'I thought's in this speech it makes me sick.' he said finally, curling his fingers together a bit tighter. 'Wren was no allowed to give you what he did and he will be punished for that. He won't be coming out anytime soon, so you have one more secret to bear and I will kill you myself for if you even would dare to utter. By the way – you're an idiot for thinking that a seal made in half a day can solve all of our problems when all generations were spent in vain.'

Tight lips tightened even more, sharp glare returning to watch the man judgmentally. What a brat, he thought. What an obnoxious, nosy spawn! He worked like a kage, in his own village, like if he had any right to, like if he didn't fail before and like if he wasn't forbidden from playing his role by now. What kind of honor he had if he didn't remember his past mistakes and played around without any boundaries or regrets with such delicate matters as moody demon? Daichi didn't think of him highly before, but by now if he could, he'd simply spit on him. The man was salt in his eye, making the known patterns go the unusual way, making chaos from his life again and again and again and again…

'But if you're so keen on putting your nose where you could lose it, then fine, I can give you an opportunity you need so much.' he said and crossed his arms, leaning back on the chair. 'Get off the jounin duty and rinse your mind. Come close to study what you're dealing with and prove your usefulness to me, maybe then I will reconsider your stupidity and forgive you your mistakes. In the end, that's all you want, right?'

One of the hand extended from the gesture and pointed at the table.

'Become the guardian of the demon's host and validate your position. If not, you can as well go back to your missions and pay for all the damage you did, both monetary and physically. I can provide safety, but can't guarantee it will always work. Suna is not a safe place.'

Which pointed heavily that if there was crowd judgment to happen, he would rather sit and watch than interrupt it. He knew how it happened and that it happened with no exceptions. Once everything will calm down, people will want to find someone to blame for all this, and it won't be hard to point fingers at the blonde. Not because of revenge, but because of safety. He knew he had deals with Konoha and he knew that would damage his position pretty well, but so would protecting the man who carelessly sunk down one sixth of the town. In such terms, it would be easier to let people evacuate from drowning ship. And if the angry mob would rise, sacrifices would have to be made – either from his or the blonde's side.

He smiled cynically.

'Since you were a kage, I don't think I have to give you time to think about it, right?'

The only sign the blonde registered what was being said to him was a small flicker of emotion when he mentioned what had happened to Wren, the rest of the redhead's speech seemed to go right past his head if the lack of reaction was anything to go by. In truth, what happened was quite the contrary- the only matter was that Minato, as most ninja, tended to lock himself in a default expression when he didn't want to give away what he was feeling. And there was a lot to feel.

Just saying how the man had imprisoned Wren was bad enough; Minato didn't particularly like the ANBU, but he wouldn't have been able to do anything without the man's help. When forced to make a harsh decision he hadn't liked it, but he still had made it, and he had chose the alternative that had, if not ensured the survival of all civilians, at least made the difference between some dying and all of them feeding the sand monstrosity. The part where he tried to blame him for what had happened and asked him to renounce his status as jounin and become some sort of… babysitter and custom seal nanny for his possessed toddler was downright outrageous.

Minato hadn't been a Hokage for that long, barely a bit over three years, but that much had been enough for him to understand when he was being played, the who's of it, however, were a bit too complex for him to figure out immediately between the exhaustion, fever and rising temper. It took considerable effort to try to think about the man's offer as a politician instead of a high ranking nin who was being thoroughly threatened. Why would the man ask him to renounce his ninja way and just toss his youngest to him?

Off the top of his mind, the first thing he thought about was money. Even when dealing with lower ranked missions, jounin were paid more than genin or chuunin. Making him lower his rank or lose it altogether would significantly cheapen his services- and Suna was cheap enough as it was on what he was doing daily. Safeguarding of one of the Kage's heir (male one, which apparently carried extra weight in this backwater inferno of a village) who could easily rip his limbs out and apparently crippled ninja weekly? Quite a lot of money. And as a seal master, under normal circumstances, Minato's wages were far from cheap.

Speaking of the matter, not taking alternate missions also meant more time dedicated exclusively to working on, how had the man put it? 'Come close to study what he was dealing with'? He could mock him all he wanted, but Minato had managed to make a previously useless seal work in twelve hours when the man's experts had been unable to for two generation. Or maybe not, because apparently in Suna, things rolled by letting them accumulate dust without anyone doing any sort of effort to at least try anything.

Did the man really think that just by denigrating him and threatening with turning him into a scapegoat… what? That it would scare Minato enough for him to panic and mindlessly agree to such a thing? He could try to put the blame on him, but the matter was the district sunk because the holes were there to start with. Sooner or later the Raccoon would have stopped supporting it. It was hard to swallow down his anger, but feeling as terrible as he did helped.

'I'm afraid I actually do need the time, Kazekage-sama.' he said blandly, his position and tone sounding both uncaring and almost submissive… if one ignored the cold glint in his eyes 'A mednin and a half have already declared me unwell, so it's probably best I don't make any important decisions until I'm not half dead on my feet… unless you prefer to discuss this arrangement with Konoha's council itself. '

The man's red brows furrowed at that, but it was the only sign of him acknowledging what was said to him. He didn't expect much – Namikaze had already showed him how much hot headed he was and yet, how blatantly ignorant, and that was enough. He gave him a chance and if he did want to discard it that way there was nothing else left but acceptance.

'You council has no privileges to talk about secrets of Suna and it will stay that way.' he muttered from behind his hands 'The only person I'm asking is you and nobody else will take responsibility for you on that. You have guts to even propose something like that.'

He glanced at the redhaired kid in his arms and his face scrunched in disgust.

'If you have no interest in being close to Shukaku, then give him to me and go back to your duties. Medical help can be found everywhere at such situation.'

Minato refused to rise to the bait- in fact, he thought the redhead to be beyond scum for so much as trying to use his budding affection for the baby as a bargain chip. He was sorry, horribly so for this, but there was nothing he could do about it. The problem now was safely extracting himself from the little thing, only when he attempted to, save from the baby fussing, nothing really happened. The sand did rise and pawed at his legs a bit, but only that. Maybe such a strong order had rattled Shukaku more than it let on. All the better, that meant he wouldn't have to use.

He carefully hand the baby to his father, and tried to leave. His honor didn't leave him. The man didn't deserve it that was for sure, and it wasn't like if it would hurt him to leave without giving it. Then again, he had promised it. Even if it was to himself.

'I have something for you.'

The kazekage simply held the baby on the arm length, obviously unhappy he had to touch him at all – and alas, deaf to the loud wailing that happened just at the very moment of handing over. Gaara obviously tried to get back to the blonde, but his poor attempts meant nothing, at least now – and in such case he didn't really have to bother with his needs. He, however, looked up at the words tossed at him.

'You have something for me?' he asked, incredulously surprised as he wouldn't expect anything from the man now. 'If it's a threat, then please, keep it to yourself.'

The blonde stopped from pulling a piece of paper from his vest to give the redhead a rather flat look. He sighed.

'Yes, because threatening the Kazekage, who pretty much implied would sick an angry mob at me just for being better than two generations worth of attempts of sealing sounds like a smart plan. Brilliant, really.'

And he left a small square of paper on the table.

'Ten seconds of inactivity. If it works well, it should also keep fatass confused for another extra minute, just try to stay still.' he gave the crying baby a sad look, but turned his back to them all the same. 'I thought I could make it better if I ever got the time.' he added in something that was equal parts mocking and bitterness. '…but as you said, what the hell would I amount to against your generations worth of vain attempts? Goodbye, Kazekage-sama.'

He would have added 'enjoy your possessed toddler', but that would have been insulting to the baby, not the father, and his grudge was against the latter. Besides, he had better things to do. Like getting home, checking on his own baby and bobby trapping the house from top to bottom. The redhead didn't answer, only furrowed his eyebrows even more. Then he turned to look at his son who, with no good results, tried to grab at Minato and drag him back to himself.

'…who would have known that disasters come close together.' he muttered and simply marched out of the room. It needed cleaning and he could not be bothered by annoyed Yashamaru. Gods knew his passive aggressive side could be just as bad as open aggression of the monster.

A few hours later, however, everything that was obtained and gained through few hours of silence fell apart when completely out of nowhere, the sandstorm came back, just as mocking and just as disastrous as before.

'I regret many things, kids are some of them.' Daichi muttered after some time of playing the pillar for the village again, his muscles stiff and unhappy. 'Support the net for me for awhile, I need to get back on my priorities.'

'Forty seven minutes, Kazekage-sama.' muttered Baki as everything fell on his shoulders, even if he was supported by a few additional ninjas, who immediately got connected to the left place. 'I won't hold it any longer.'

'Could be enough.' muttered Daichi and vanished in a swirl of dust. A moment later he was greeted with some tricky traps and one angry samurai frog, but he discarded them all on reflex and nasty throw of poisonous scorpion as a sub.

'I don't really like your methods, but I came to apologize.' he muttered as he entered the room 'And if you cut off my head, we will all be swallowed alive by one toddler's remorse and then there's only one fate to us all.'

Minato obviously wasn't in the mood or in any capacity to cut anyone's head. The man was resting in the couch with a cold compress on his forehead and a baby who seemed to be in the last sniffly throws of a good wail curled on his chest. It stopped midway through it to gape at the man with wide eyes a shade or two more into the turquoise zone than his father's eyes, one chubby little hand rubbing at his cheek.

Minato also pulled the compress off to stare at the redhead, who was occupying most of the door coated in several layers of gritty sand, half of his face covered in darker powder from that he supposed was a halfway disarmed exploding tag. In the background, the samurai toad rolled around the dirt, for all appearances wrestling with a similarly sized scorpion trying to skewer it with two tails.

'…you are seeing it too, right?' he asked the toad sitting on the small table next to him, not looking away from the disturbing sight.

'Yep.'

'Huh.'

Baby sniffled and let out a tired wail, mouth working insistently on his father's necklace.

'Please call the scorpions back and close the door… Kazekage-sama, I'll assume.' the toad said after a moment, resuming its work on the tea it had been brewing before they were so rudely interrupted. 'You are letting the sand in.'

The redhead obediently closed the door without much noise, however he didn't come closer. The arms once again crossed in front of his chest in defensive stance as he observed the flat and the frog brewing the tea.

'Kurotaro doesn't go for a kill unless I tell him to, so you frog friend can train for awhile.' he muttered, ignoring the clang of the battle behind the door. He looked at the unpainted walls (very common view everywhere) and the blonde baby and pursed his lips in sophisticated nonchalant way. 'As I said, I came to apologize. My act was a result of foul mouth and foggy mind. I am ashamed of it.'

Then he looked at the frog and tapped his finger on his own shoulder for a moment.

'Is he very sick?'

'He's not sick.' the blonde said defensively, hugging the baby closer 'He's just fussy because he's teething and he hasn't slept too much.' The emphasis he used to say this was an act, though. Likely because if Naruto did get sick, his father would probably go into a blind panic.

'I think he means you, brat. And to answer your question, Kazekage-sama, he is dehydrated an running a fever.' The Toad clarified, finishing stirring the beverage and removing the spoon. 'Drink it while it's hot.'

Minato gave the mug a rather uninspired look.

'…sugar?'

The animal ninja made a gesture with its oddly human-like hands that provably hinted at this not being the first time such a question was uttered.

'Sweetening up medicine won't necessarily make it taste better; what are you, five?' Minato stuck his tongue out at his summon and drowned the tea down in two great shuddering gulps. 'I swear, you are worse than Jiraiya.'

For all answer Minato threw the cup at the summon (though softly enough it caught it and straightened it without much of an effort) and slumped on the couch tiredly, one hand groping around the table for more of the honeyed candy he always seemed to have around. The sound of the wrapper being torn seemed to catch the baby's attention, because he pushed himself up on his hands, and after a few moments of indecision, gave the sticky paper a decided swap.

Minato didn't seem very convinced of the idea, but he did let the baby take it to his mouth where it started to furiously chew on it, one corner safely held by his father's fingers so he wouldn't try to swallow it.

'What do you want from me?' the blonde asked bluntly, eyes following the baby's play with the wrapper. Because the man certainly hadn't come just to apologize. Even if he had really believed what he was saying –and Minato was willing to put some high stakes on that fact he didn't - he probably wouldn't have admitted it under torture.

The redhead didn't answer right away. Instead, he kept on watching the frog playing with a kettle – indeed, he cherished the talk between the man and summon, because thanks to it he could finally understand what was going on around there. The name 'Jiraiya' was an indication. He didn't know him personally, but fame was superior to his existence, even in such dead end as his village was. Finally, he turned toward the pair of blondes on the bed, watching them rather unamusedly.

'I wanted to apologize, that's all.' he said, but he didn't move from the spot. Instead, he got new object to observe, and that was a tiny toddler chewing on a sweet stick. It didn't look like if he was going to move out anytime soon. The baby stared back with bright, curious eyes, but other than making a vague waving motion that could mean 'hello', 'come closer', 'shoo shoo' or even 'your fly's open', he seemed a little too interested on the crunchy paper too specify.

'I'm sure.' the blonde said blandly, and since the redhead was looking fixedly at his baby, he pulled at him closer possessively.

'…Kazekage-sama, meet my son, Uzumaki Naruto.'

Hearing his name got the baby's attention from the stranger back to his father. The little blonde made an inquisitive noise, but since his father didn't answer, he settled for slumping back on his chest, one hand holding the paper securely and the other clutching his father's shirt.

Daichi nodded, not bothering to even address the kid in any way, as he only kept his eyes on him because he didn't look at anything else. In the back of his mind there was a clock ticking and it was hard to keep the straight face when he was in hurry to get back to his promised spot. He knew that if he would get back with empty hands, something would collapse – would it be another part of the town, Gaara's patience or his own spine. And then there would be very little to save from what would be left of four generations of ninja living on the loose sands.

He started tapping his finger on his forearm again, this time out of stress, not even seeing he was doing that. He knew that if he would ask, the man would simply refuse. And if he would demand, he would also get nothing. The only way would be literally seducing the man into wanting to go with him – not in sexual way, as he doubted it would have worked – but he had little to offer. He doubted that a gallon of milk or his pride would matter to him at all. He looked at the frog.

'Can I get a cup of tea too?'

The frog's horizontal pupils went to the man for a moment, before throwing the spoon inside the now empty mug and picking it up under one stocky arm.

'I only have medicinal, I'm afraid-'

'There's mint in the kitchen.' the blonde said before even thinking about it. '…there's also coffee, but it's instant.'

It was Minato's new best friend since a few weeks ago when Naruto went from sleeping eighteen hours a day to *not* sleeping eighteen hours a day and wanting company through it. He had never particularly cared for the thing, even though he found the scent soothing, so he did away with the cheapest thing out of necessity.

'No, just tea.' said Daichi and went back to watching the actions of the youngest person in the room. Normally he would ask for coffee – but he was sick of it. He would have never suspected that such day would come – in the end, he had always found the taste of coffee pleasant enough to drink it day after day for twenty years, but his stomach could take only so much; he hadn't been sleeping almost fifty hours now and he had gallons of those in his system – he was sure he could actually measure himself in amounts of blood in caffeine. Anything more and his stomach would break from the bitterness and his eyes would pop out of his head.

'Gamakijou-san…'

The summon grumbled something about summoning Gamamaido if he wanted to be served that badly, but he did retreat with the mug in his hands and that oddly duck-like step that toads got when they attempted to walk on hind legs. Once he wasn't around to nag him about it, Minato pulled the compress away from his face, pushing humid bangs out of the way and straightened up into a sitting position.

'I'm sure you have better places to go ask for tea.' he said bluntly, one hand going to cradle the baby's head when he started fussing at the change of position. The moment his father touched some secret spot inside that sunny mass, the baby practically purred and sagged on his arms, the amount of noise coming from the creaky wrapper diminishing significantly in both volume and redhead watched him quietly, then he unfolded his arms only to fold them again, only trading places between both of his hands.

'No, actually, I don't.' he answered truthfully. Nobody really thought about such things now and Yashamaru, whose only duty now was taking care of his remaining older children didn't even dare to show up in the room where all sensoring ninjas had gathered. He was most likely just taking care of his own safety. 'Nobody of us do.'

Minato knew what the man meant, but he wasn't in any mood to be understanding.

'Oh. I'm sorry.'

'So am I.' added the man as he looked at the clock on the wall. He had already wasted twenty minutes. 'And I assume you feel too sick to even get up from this bed.'

'…would you drag me by the hair again if I were?' That, however, was being petty, and feeling sick or not, Minato was aware of it.

'I can get up…' he sighed, fingers stroking lazily Naruto' scalp 'I can go out and try to help, but I doubt it would make a difference- my chakra is too low to do much, I don't think I'll be able to do something good enough before half of the city is ran under tons of sand and I don't dare to use the same jutsu from before.'

And not exactly because the redhead hadn't liked it or because it had traumatized his son. He literally didn't dare pull the same stunt on the raccoon because he could have figured something that would make them all regret it horribly. The redhead shook his head and looked back to the clock.

'I don't need your chakra, however low our resources are.' he muttered 'All I need is your presence. This sandstorm is not happening because Shukaku is a sadistic demon only because Gaara wants to express his rage.'

And that was enough for a saying. He wasn't enough to calm the child down, because the child didn't want him – not before, not now. It grew attached to Minato and it wanted him back, the whole village be damned. He felt like a minion on the mercy of crazy ruler, tossed by unpredictableness into every possible direction. And so far, it was not very far from the truth – it was Gaara who held them all in his little chubby hand, even if he didn't know that yet.

He was scared of thinking what would happen once he would reach age of awareness.

'Just you is all I need.' he muttered again, getting ready to even carry the man to his house, as he seemed to be seriously out of his medical condition. Priorities and all that.

Minato didn't know what to answer to this.

That the creature could create this amount of destruction out of an unhappy baby just didn't make sense to him, and not exactly out of lacking the amount of chakra. As all tailed beats, the thing was literally made of it, but why wasn't it affecting the baby? When the monster had been stranded, Gaara had been shocked stiff, but not sleepy. One would have thought that with the thing gone, the first thing in order of business would have been a good nap.

The summon came back while he finished trying to figure out what he could do, leaving the strong brew on the table in front of the redhead and jumping to sit next to the blonde on the couch, one hand running through the round beads of a smaller bracelet it kept on one hand. In the meantime, Minato thought. What could he do in such a situation?

One lesson his sensei had taught him and that he fully agreed with was 'never sell yourself cheap'. He couldn't let this man strip everything he had away from him just because it was convenient for him. If he gave the redhead a hand, he was likely to rip his arm out of his socket, and then how long before he was demoted to babysitter like Yashamaru? He didn't know the story behind that, but abrasive as the man had been, he seemed like a perfectly fit shinobi and there really was no reason the other blonde couldn't be living somewhere else and some genin girl or something taking care of the older kids. He couldn't give in so easily.

Then again, there were hundreds of refugees stored in the ANBU office and the hospital and… where the hell had the redhead stashed the ones who had previously been stranded in the village's center? The panic among civilians would be catastrophic, especially after just half a day of tranquility. If black eyes popping out of walls and floors could be called that.

'…I'll help you this time.' he said after a moment, shifting the baby in his arms. Naruto had seemed to doze off at some point of their conversation. 'But only if you release Wren first. You shouldn't have said you would give me those seals if they were so important. You weren't around to ask and neither was anyone of higher rank, and he did the best he could under the circumstances… If you have any survivors out of the sunk district, it's thanks to him.'

'I don't think he should be taking credit for those who have really helped to save those people.' muttered Daichi, openly rejecting acknowledging of Wren's gains 'And you have the nerve to ask me that.'

Really. Though he was more prone to being happy than angry now – if this was all it took, it was not a high price. In the end Wren was a faithful ANBU who knew his place more often than not. If he was a serious criminal, he'd have to stop and think twice, but in here, the answer was clear. He didn't let it show though. He went silent for another bunch of seconds.

'…all right.' he said finally, when the silence grew wide enough to become uncomfortable. 'I will let Wren go, but only because the situation is urgent and I value the village more than a single life. Now, that we have this resolved, come with me.'

The blonde nodded, eyes down to his son, who looked very small and very fragile like that. Very easily lost. How did he keep getting himself into these situations?

'Gamakijou-san, would you-"

'Yes, yes, babysitting duty again.' the toad's plump body grew even more as it filled itself in what surely was general toad expression of disapproval. 'But I tell you: I don't like it.'

'Thank you for your help.' Obviously the gods were on the Kazekage's side, because other than mewling lightly at being shifted, Naruto didn't stir. Minato covered him carefully with the blanket and somehow managed to stand up. Daichi watched him do it and allowed it, however when the blonde started wobbling on his legs like a one hundredth years old man, he had enough.

'Hold on tight.' he said as he simply grabbed him and tossed him over his shoulder like a bag of potatoes, in the next moment opening the door and whistling at one of many of his summons. Kurotaro seemed to be more than happy to vanish.

'Just going on a walk.' He said to a frog as he walked by it. In another second they both vanished in the swirl of sand.

'Boss!'

Having lost his 'don't hit yourself' partner for the moment, Gamanatsu quickly gathered her bearings and charged for the stranger.

'Hey- what are you doing?' Minato said, pushing at the man's back to get some sort of straightness back into the world. What the hell was wrong with this man? Why would he be so cruel to jab his shoulder on his tender ribs and make him bend over the fresh stitches? It was at this moment that he realized that he didn't just hate the Kazekage- the man hated him right back. This was further cemented when an instant later the man rewarded his squirming by gratuitous amounts of sand slapping him in the face and the redhead practically tossing him to an ANBU guard.

'I get back to work now.' said Daichi, most likely not disturbed by the fact what he did. 'You also do what you need to do.' With that he nodded to the guards and sat down to get connected back to the net again.

Minato personally thought he could do with a vacation, but doubted that's what the man referring to but doing what was needed. At least now he was practically on the roof of this weirdly round-roofed Kazekage tower, which meant it was only a matter of getting inside the building and down several stores to find an exit that would lead him straight to kage's house. One cursory search through the kage's person for his stash of pills (it earned him a weird look) Minato was good enough to get down by his own means, even if he was probably getting tachycardia, if the rate at which his heart started beating was anything to go by.


	10. Chapter 10

This time no one tried to stop Minato or warn him about it- no one strictly alive, that is. Sand surely tried to damage him, but it was an unfocused sort of attack, more like if it were lashing out at everything and Minato just happened to be in the way. Apparently Shukaku again was having fun outside now that it could break its curfew and was too busy to pay more than cursory attention to its cute little human envelope.

'Baby?' he called, his breath reduced to great gulps of air filled with gritty sand. 'Gaara!'

He didn't expect an answer, but the last he had seen of the child had been at the kitchen. Who knew where his father had gotten him by now, though he was willing to bet it involved the cellar. And he wasn't wrong. Gaara couldn't be found in the kitchen or living room or even the bathroom as he was indeed – hidden in his own private cellar. Just as dark (but with window's light hitting directly the cradle), just as unpleasant (there was absolutely no decoration beside one lonely picture of desert in the full sunset, imitating the view from the window pretty well) and just as gruesome (stains on the floor surely couldn't be tomato soup). Gaara had been laying in the centre of the room - surprisingly, unguarded and unsurprisingly – unhappy. The cries that went unmuffled by walls could be heard in every corner of the house, like air through the pipes. The persona itself didn't look tad a bit better – red, almost violet from crying, covered in snot and tears, screaming unpleasantly loud and covered in smell that could go either with diaper not being changed for some time or maybe just lack of proper bath. The air in the room was stuffed with chakra – chakra full of anger and sorrow, but the child didn't seem to react to it. If anything, he seemed to be just engulfed in his own screaming, the shouting coming from it and ending in it in one big nut.

Happy welcome for sure.

Minato somehow avoided getting toppled over by a stray and almost lazy wave of sand that tossed him to the wall. What the hell was Shukaku doing?

'Gaara!' he tried again, but to no avail. Either the room had much better soundproofing from the outside to the inside or Gaara had locked up on himself and wasn't willing to listen to anyone right now. He heard something crash somewhere upstairs, hoped it was something devilishly expensive just so the redhead had something he would actually mourn over and pushed himself off just as the sand seemed to get bored of playing on this floor. The sand covering everything was so loose he couldn't walk over it, so he had to wade through piles and piles of grains that almost reached his knees. It was while he was pondering if maybe write back home just so he could tell Kakashi's weird spandex-clad friend that if he wanted some hardcore training for muscles he just had found the perfect thing for it that he reached the cellar's door.

He didn't waste any time opening it. The sand also didn't waste time giving its meekest, most uninterested push yet, which in his state was enough to send him toppling down the stairs. Even in his state Minato had enough control of his body not to damage himself too badly, but it took some unnatural bending of limbs to finally manage to catch the railing, inches before his head hit the floor.

'Gaara!'

The brief shake down the stairs had broken his perspective of where up started and down began, and it was only because he caught on a miraculously standing chair that he managed to first get up and then carefully move towards the crying child. He stared at the baby, eyes lost and unfocused. How could something this tiny cause this much damage?

'Hey… hey baby…' his hand stroked one soft cheek, now streaked with tears. 'I'm here, hush now.'

The redhead immediately opened his eyes, starring at the source of the touch – so unexpected and sudden, missed all the way to him. In before, he sensed people before they came close, it was first time he got startled by a person being close by. That's why for a moment air just seemed to hesitate, unconvinced whether to roll into danger or panic, the sand lazily moving behind the door with much more confusion. But after a few seconds, when he finally recognized the smell, the sound of voice, the touch – it all came clear. The face that slowly regained its original color once again turned pink as the baby wildly flailed for the man above him, desperately wanting his attention.

'There, there.' the blonde cooed again, wiping the trails of tears. 'It's all okay. Everything's all right now. I've got you.'

If he could hold up to this promise was debatable, however: he wasn't sure he could pick the baby up. Not because he weighted much, but because so far he had been using both arms to support himself on things so he wouldn't crash on them. The least he wanted was to accidentally drop the little redhead. In the end he leaned as much as he could on the cradle, which luckily was a rather solid construction, and once he had the redhead in his arms he turned around and slowly let himself fall back down so he was sitting on the floor, the baby safely cradled to his chest.

'Quiet now, everything is allright.'

Gaara wheezed against his chest heavily, then caught the lose material of the shirt in one of his hands, calming down rather quickly. Then, he simply mumbled something that could mean anything – from sentence to emotive sound closing by to 'welcome back' to 'I see dead people' (not that very far from possible considering whom the kid was) – and sneezed loudly, making the snot cover the lower part of his face. But it didn't seem to bother him, just as much as anything else – the air slowly lifted the heaviness, scattering the chakra like mist at the dawn along with the sand that slowed down to the point of light shiver. Someone on the other side of the house shouted something that sounded like a hysterical cry of joy, then a sound of running could be heard, but nothing much beside that. Green eyes looked up at Minato, watching, observing.

Minato wished he had brought with him the intercom, but he had left it, with pretty much everything else back at his home. The unnatural chakra was dispelling from the air, though, which he supposed meant the raccoon was back to whatever metaphorical corner of the baby's being it usually went to when it came to inactivity.

'That's right, all's better now, right?' he said in the same soft tones, merely because the baby kept looking at him as if he expected something out of him. He was a mess again, too, and he also smelled like one. If he had more energy, Minato would take him upstairs and change him and maybe give him a scrub, depending on how receptive the baby felt about it. Now, he barely managed to reach up for the mangled blanket in the crib and slowly starting to rub the worst of the much on his face off. 'Well, now's better.'

He just hoped he wouldn't be locked up here like they had before. He had no idea how he'd get out this time. Gaara slowly opened the eyes he closed as Minnie wiped off the lower part of his face and got back to starring. It seemed to be such an absorbing activity he didn't do anything else. The sand outside stopped moving at all. A few seconds later a pair of curious eyes looked inside along with a personified body of a wooden doll.

'Father said to not look inside.' muttered the girly voice 'He is dangerous.'

'We're not doing anything.' Muttered the boy and kept looking in 'We will just take a look and go.'

And so, they continued on starring. This is what he got for wishing. He should learn by now after his adventure at becoming a parent. Life would take any and all lacking of specifications for toying with him?

'Kids?' he called tiredly. 'Go look for Yashamaru- Or your father, or some ANBU. You really shouldn't be here. It's not safe.'

'You're not our father to tell us what to do.' answered the boy, not moving from the spot. The girl moved like if she wanted to comply, but she stopped, hesitant. The redhead's gaze shifted from Minato to the door and back to the blonde. He didn't seem to be interested by them much, considered they didn't make much noise. Minato tried to keep that attention by stroking the smooth patch of skin where the baby's eyebrows should be.

'No, but I know he won't be happy when he finds out you were here. And unless you leave right now, I will tell.'

Where the hell was Yashamaru? He couldn't believe someone would have left such small kids alone just minutes after the second large storm of the day happened. The kids looked back in silence and just as quietly moved away, obviously touched by the uttered words. Yashamaru was not in sight to be seen. However his voice reached the higher parts of the building quite nicely once he decided to speak up.

'…why are you doing this, you're hurting meee-!' he yelled, his voice changing into a thin yell, too thin to be considered manly and too high pitched to be considered a tone used in a friendly conversation. As the seconds passed it became very obvious he was in pain, the sound of sobbing proving it with clarity. No one else seemed to say anything loud enough to be hearable, no sounds of battle could be omitted. A figure of Baki passed the room, talking on the intercom like if nothing has happened, briefly looking inside the room of Gaara. He didn't seem to have anything to tell to Minato at this point.

Minato winced at the pitch. That was another reason why he preferred pissed-off Yashamaru- the man tended to occasionally sound so, well- feminine, and it just made him uncomfortable. Minato was all for gender equality and would be the first to admit there were women who could kick some serious ass, but that didn't mean he felt comfortable with the idea of hurting one, during training or otherwise. And Yashamaru not only looked like one, occasionally sounded like one and acted more feminine than most he knew. When the master of the house was around, at least.

Oh, wow, what an uncomfortable thought. Such unfortunate implications.

'…do you even *have* pupils?' he asked, tilting the baby's head up and inspecting the pale green eyes. It wasn't the first time he saw people whose irises were blended almost evenly with his. Inoichi's sister, for example. Gaara didn't do much beside blinking once and moving his eyes slightly, his nostrils working harder now. He seemed to be even less interested in the new sound, but he also seemed to be fully taking in what was happening around himself. He opened his mouth, but no sound came out and closed it. For a moment it could be quite a confusing sign, but then he yawned, and it ended on that.

Baki passed the room again, obviously walking around with his walkie-talkie and stopped by the door frame, listening to the intercom. Someone kept on talking to it in dry, old voice, indicating that such rarity as warriors of age of sixty surely existed somewhere in Suna. Baki kept on nodding to the communicator, even if there was no way the man could see him. At the same time he kept on giving the pair inside the room an unfocused look. Downstairs, something made of glass or porcelain broke. Minato looked back at the man, doing his best to focus on what the old voice was saying, but they were too far away and the intercom was still acting creaky. It didn't seem to be anything out of the norm. He waited on a pause in the conversation to make a gesture towards the younger man. Something in the lines of 'Yay, baby is calm. What now?'

The man looked back, then turned around to face away from the blonde. It wasn't until the talk over the walkie-talkie was done he decided to turn back.

'I can tell you I don't have any further instructions than to look around and make sure you don't get hugged to death by the demon.' he said and hid the radio in his vest pocket. 'You can move around the house by now and your room is supposedly being done at the given moment. If you want I can show you where it is.'

It probably was a testimony to Minato's absolute exhaustion when he waited for half a minute and the sentence still didn't make sense. Because to him it sounded like if they meant for him to stay there. As in, for more than just a few more hours. Enough for it to require living equipment.

'Why would I need a room.' he asked. Said, actually- he just couldn't get enough hope into the sentence to make it sound like a question. Baki looked at him, not moved by the least. After what he lived through within last few days, rarely anything could compare at such moment of relief.

'To sleep in it.' he said 'I don't know how you do it normally, but in this house people sleep in beds. I'm not going to stop you from sleeping on the floor if you need to, but you can do it in the place that had been assigned to you.'

'A ha ha ha.' Minato painfully enunciated, like a particularly bad actor reading a particularly bad script for the first time. 'I think I'd rather sleep in the bed inside the house I'm leaving with. With my son and my naggy summon.'

He looked at the baby. And carefully, slowly and inch by inch started moving his hands under his arms so he could pry him off, even when he knew what would green eyes flashed at him immediately, expression changing first into completely panicked one, then melting into protesting cry that was indeed, sharp enough to make Baki wince. And then, the sand immediately jumped at Minato's hands and almost crushed them in the process as Gaara tightened his hold on Minato's shirt.

Baki coughed.

'I wouldn't… try to do that so soon. If I may suggest.'

Minato only made an odd noise as he somehow managed to bite back a surprised and pained shout. He would have been very happy to let it out, along with some colorful cursing, but self preservation told him startling the not-quite-as-calm-as-he-looked baby right now wouldn't be too stellar an idea.

'Okay, all right baby…' he said in a voice that sounded a bit too much like someone about to have a brilliant emotional collapse. 'I'm staying over. Just for a day or two.'

He didn't manage to convince himself. He had no idea how he was going to extract himself from Gaara now. Not now, not a week from now, not a billion years from now- he suddenly pictured himself with his arms bent and fused so he'd always be carrying Gaara. Just break them once, rearrange them however you wanted and wait for them to heal. Custom made permanent baby perch. It wasn't a pretty image.

With his hands like that, there wasn't much he could do. So he talked and nuzzled the baby a bit until he felt the little body stop tensing quite as much as he was a moment before.

'…there's a square seal in my pocket.' he said after some time. 'Place it on the baby's forehead or his nape, please.'

Baki looked at him suspiciously.

'What kind of seal?' he asked, eyeing them both 'I don't have much chakra left. Anything above average level would not be good for me now.'

The blonde shook his head lightly, butting his head lightly against the baby's to try and coax him to look up.

'No more than walking on water.'

Baki sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. He has always felt uneasy when the baby started crying because it was usually the first – and usually also the last – sign that the massive genocide would take place, one way or another. However, he was there to keep an eye on both of them, so he was not leaving them with backing away. Slowly, he approached the pair, keeping in mind to not make any harsh moves and slowly took out the seal with a tempo of tortoise napping during the lunch break. During that time, Gaara managed to change the pitch of his voice to lower and quieter one, though he kept on bawling, even at the all (very suicidal in Baki's opinion) sugarcoating Minato did. It was somehow good at this point, because Gaara didn't really notice his doings, and when he did – it was too late and the seal was already put on his forehead. Baki moved away in a mere second, barely hearing the startled squeak the baby made – and wheezed the air in stress. He really didn't like being put in such situations.

The seal, unlike the one he had seen the Kazekage use, didn't burn itself out. It glimmered faintly for a fraction of a second; in that eerie way some wild fungus in Mizu glowed when the humidity was too high. Then simply unglued itself from the baby's head and fluttered to the floor.

Nothing seemed to happen for several seconds, but then the sand seemed to ripple like if a small stone had been thrown into a pond. A grain of sand from the hardened 'arm warmers' on his arms fluttered to the floor. It was followed by other, and yet another one- soon it was trickling at a more or less steady pace, like a small sandglass with a too thin neck. It was unbearably slow and at time the sand seemed to stop and not know what it was doing- the one in the floor occasionally twitched and tried to move in some direction, but it seemed to act like it was all too much effort and soon fell into inactivity again.

Minato didn't try to move again, save from the constant fussing over the child- the last he wanted was to regain the sands attention, but even so, this wasn't what he had been aiming at. He should be happy it was working at all, but he was disappointed with the result. He had expected it to work much faster than this. The amount of chakra used was acceptable, but his was supposed to be help when someone was about to get crushed. At this rate, nothing would be able to be done for whoever was on the receiving end of the sand's attention until said person could easily fit in someone's pocket. One hand finally was free, and he carefully brought it up to smooth the lines of stress on the baby's wide, otherwise smooth forehead.

'That's okay, Little Red. It's all gone. Be nice now, yes?'

Gaara let out a moan of unhappiness, then stopped, gulped for air and repeated himself, this time even quieter. His eyes focused on the man's face again, listening to him despite anything – captivated by the tone. The touch on the forehead surely felt nice – not rough, not threatening… He blinked, gulped for air one more time and finally calmed down. Now he had been only breathing by mouth and staring at the man with a bit curious and yet, scared expression.

'So… do you want to view your room, Hokage-sama?' muttered Baki, observing the scene in silence, amazed by how it played out. Surely, he had no kids, but calming down a baby seemed to be a miracle. Especially this baby. Minato smiled encouragingly at the baby and gave him a small nuzzle. He wished the baby wouldn't look at him like hat, it hurt him to see something so small so scared of him. Especially when he looked like something that could have belonged to Kushina's family.

'…I don't think I can get up on my own anymore.' he sighed after a moment, not even managing to care enough to feel embarrassed by admitting such a thing. He just felt entirely spent and so depressed all he wanted was to curl somewhere away from humanity and maybe never quite rejoin it. 'Baby also need changing but. I don't think it's a good idea right now.' Not if their fantastic adventure when he had been far more receptive towards him and a prepared and not exhausted group of specialized shinobi at his disposal had been any hint. But he also couldn't exactly leave the baby like that. It would irritate his bum. Babies tended to be very unhappy when that happened, and as he had learned, this wasn't a baby you wanted unhappy.

'What do you do in these situations?'

'Pray.' was the honest answer. Baki, even if he would want to lie, he knew he wouldn't stray very much from the truth. It was demon child they were still talking about, right? Nothing to love about it, nothing to regret. 'It's not like if he will die from the lack of bath. We will regain our position and strength and then we will deal with danger again. Suicide is not a resolution but stupidity in case of a dirty diaper.'

The redhead blinked and continued on breathing through half opened mouth, his features still wary and untrusting. But the hold on a shirt was strong enough to leave the material crumpled. However, he closed his eyes once the nuzzle was given and gurgled quietly in response. He was still confused about how to react to such gestures, so he tried to do that in the few ways that came to his mind, one by one. It took several seconds for the man's words to get through Minato's head, but strangely enough (especially given the topic) they did.

'…what.' he said, tone flat and angry. 'You go around without changing the baby until it's absolutely necessary or something?'

When he'd been in the house the first week, every single time diaper change had become necessary, Minato had to practically drag the ANBU to help him with it. And all the while he thought it was because the first time they gave it a go Shukaku had tried to slice his back to shreds. No wonder the baby had such irritated skin. He thought it was because occasionally the sand crawled under his clothing, but now that he thought about it, the sand never seemed to physically hurt the baby.

'Yes.' answered Baki curtly and just as flatly, however his voice was lacking any kind of anger… and sympathy. Gaara was nothing but a demon, like an overly dangerous animal of sophisticated needs. He tended less vicious animals and yet, they didn't specifically need you to touch them, change their collar every few hours or to play with their paws so they could occasionally scratch the skin of your skull. And Gaara wanted just that, at the age of few months. It was not much, but at terms of someone who had to deal with it again and again for the last six months it was way too much; no ninja was built to deal with S ranked missions day by day, hour after hour. And that's what Gaara was – S ranked mission on leash. At some point his priorities simply shifted and he started viewing his life as more expensive than comfort of crying demon host. As much as life of his soldiers. The man who had to deal with the toddler only twice and without half of usual damage as he was the favorite of the redheaded uglification, had no ground to be angry at him. He was not picking a fight over something like that though.

'Do you wish for me to carry you to your room?'

Minato groaned. And they wondered why the baby acted the way he did- no one held him, no one spoke to him and no one even bothered to change him often enough to be somewhat healthy. That the baby had an immunological system that could probably set most poisons on fire at contact alone didn't mean anything - and Minato wasn't exactly talking about social services. Sure, it seemed wrong to neglect and in fact the way the people did with this one, but if he set that aside (and he'd been a soldier for enough time he actually could) …it just didn't seem smart to keep the baby soiled when it obviously lead to painful skin rashes. Especially when so much as brushing against them could end up with someone losing a limb.

Gaara obviously was able to feel pain, and obviously as normal enough he got the usual irritations associated with exposure to acids. Which made sense given how his urine was probably made out of the same things his magical antibodies- oh, wow, he was running off a tangent here or what? His brains had to be more mashed than he thought if he was trying to scientifically analyze the composition of jinchuuriki's stools.

'Some help would be appreciated,' he said, shifting the baby to one side with a tired sigh. 'The Kazekage gave me a while ago some sort of cold cream. Apparently it can numb the skin or something, would you know what it was?'

Baki held up his hands.

'I know nothing of the poisons and meds this household has, don't ask me.' he muttered 'And don't count on me with the help, I already said I'm almost out of chakra. Most of us are and those who aren't are not in the right state either.'

'Yeah, okay.' the older man said, nodding agreeably. So much for help. 'Do you know where Vulture or Lark are?' he really wished he had a wider social circle, but so far, the people he actually had exchanged more than a dozen words with amounted to Naruto's babysitter, the Kazekage, his family and his ANBU. And he knew that Wren, Devil and Roadrunner were as exhausted as everyone else. Last time he had seen Lark, the man was going to move to the center of the village to help settle things there, and Vulture, as he had been with Gaara all the time, was the most likely to have saved some of his chakra.

Baki frowned lightly, then sighed.

'We're searching for Vulture. Since we don't know where had he ran to, we can't really find him. And maybe that's better.' he said, then looked down at his nails. The punishment waited for the man for leaving the demon alone with the income of the village's budget, that was sure. 'Lark was helping building up the barrier. I don't think you will find anyone in ANBU who is not exhausted, unless they were prisoners. And they're not helping you anytime soon.'

A pause.

'Just let the demon be. He won't die from a bit of excrements and we all felt worse smells during our shinobi life. At least in here.'

Minato raised a hand - then let it fall, lifelessly, making a dull sound against his tight when it hit there, everything in his demeanor talking about frustration.

'Look, Baki- I like you. I think you are a good man and I have nothing against you and I don't want to discuss how to take care of your jinchuuriki- your monster- your baby, your whatever you want to call it.' He closed his eyes, leaned even more against the sand/stone cradle behind his back. 'It's not about the smell. It's because he gets a rash. And a baby-' and he nearly threw something when he saw how that word made the man react, but given how the only thing he had at hand was Gaara, he had no option but to abstain from it.

'-any baby of any shape or form full of sores is a very unhappy baby. And given how the one he's glued to is me, and how I'm the one most likely to get beheaded if I accidentally brush those very same sores lack of changing causes, really, for my benefit- and your financial one, can I just… try to care a bit. Please? For my baby? Not this one, the other one I had to abandon to calm this one.'

Baki looked at him with no understanding in his eyes.

'I don't have babies so I can't sympathize. Sorry.' he said and rubbed his cheek 'I have no salves for rash, I don't know if this household have one. I won't help you change the diaper and I'm not moving from here until you make it to your room. That's all.'

That got a dry, humorless chuckle out of Minato.

'Yes. I'm sure you are.' and he found himself wishing that the baby would really finish him after all; and do it in such a horrible way not only would Konoha retire whatever funds they were sending, but actually bother to claim war again and run the village to the ground. It would probably be doing this speck of half-life in the desert a favor- obviously all these people would be better off disbanding and joining other villages the way Uzushiogakure had.

Or maybe not. The people here were from another planet, as far as he could see it. He had no idea how could live the way they did, without caring or even trying. He wished Kushina would be here. She would explain him how the hell these people managed to exist like this for generations. Or maybe just drag the Kazekage to one corner and beat him black and blue. That would have been really nice.

'Get me out of here then.'

Baki looked at him, then at the baby. It was only a moment later when all three of them were walking down the stairs, Minato in Baki's arms and disturbed redhead in his arms. They passed by some ANBU carrying large part of rock and the social worker with a piece of map. At some point someone was screaming at someone else and there was no Kazekage in sight. After a short walk a refreshed chilled down room with securely closed windows revealed itself, along with bed covered with something that looked like curtain from old theatre and carpet in unusual flowery pattern. Gaara, still disturbed, opened his eyes wider and started sniffing around wildly. At this point Baki left him on the bed and went out without a word.

Minato waited until the man was out to allow his back and shoulders some degree of relaxation. Reaching behind his back to pull at the pillow and roll it against the wall, he adjusted it until he could sit against it, then stroked a hand down the back of the baby's head, feeling the fine red hairs against his hand. They felt even softer than before, what with him having rubbed it raw against the wall hours before.

'Well, this isn't too bad, huh? Nice room. And no one round to remind me what an idiot I am.'

Sure, they probably where looking at him through a camera - he even knew where he would put it if it had been in their place, but hell if he actually cared enough to so much as throw a kunai in the direction. There was no point to it. It sure beat trying to get some rest while he had another person staring fixedly at his back.

'…what is it?'

The redhead meeped, trying to move his head to the side, obviously interested by something. The sand, that followed them in slow motion changed its course, and instead of pooling around the legs of Minato it started crawling toward the dressing table. The old mirror was covered in dust and broken, but the drawers inside it had seemed to be untouched. The redhead looked at it, then, moved his hands and started flailing, wanting to be kept obediently pulled him a little closer. It wasn't the most comfortable position in the world, so he pulled Gaara a little higher so he could lean a bit against his shoulder, one hand patting his back consolingly. He glared at the sand as it tried to trickle inside the closed drawers. What the call, crazy, drunk and kleptomaniac to boot?

'Hey, crazy. That's not yours, get out of there.'

The sand didn't listen, patiently creeping inside the closed shelves, seating inside and staying there. At one point, the lock broke and one of the drawers fell down on the other one, making sand spill and the objects spread – small jewelry, clothes that looked like big scarves and various bottles that could be both poisonous and unharming. They all smelled with old perfumes, unused and probably much stronger than intended to at the beginning. The sand didn't catch them, so they all fell on the floor, hitting the carpet ungracefully. The redhead, cuddled close to Minato's neck moved around to look at them, the hawk for shiny. A moment later he was trying to reach out for the objects on the floor, also tugging at Minato's ear for all his might.

'Ow! Hey-' he grabbed the baby's hand, pulling it away carefully. 'Little Red, that's not nice, if you want something *ask* for it.'

He really, *really* didn't care for getting up just now, but it wasn't like if he could just take a nap now either way. He wouldn't dare without someone else watching the baby so he wouldn't think of joining in. And it wasn't that far away, was it?

No, it just felt that way. He didn't quite stagger the five steps away from the dressing table, but almost. Either way he managed to get there, inspecting the mess with a roll of eyes.

'Awesome. Want to bet I'm getting blamed for this?' the perfumes were a little too heady for his taste, but they might have been pleasant on their own. He problem was how they had fallen one over the other so now the smell downright stifling. He looked longingly at the window, but even from this distance he could see the seals keeping it shut.

'Great.'

The mess of glass certainly wasn't suitable for a child, and the sand seemed busy trying to masticate it either way. Instead, he rummaged for the upper shelves for something more suiting for a toothless infant. There was what looked like a tiny music box, but he didn't dare open it- he had enough with one baby with squeaky toys at home. Besides, what if he found the melody lulling? He settled for a colorful sash thing. It was soft and didn't have any sharp edges, and Gaara wouldn't be compelled to throw it at him. That was baby-proofed as far as he considered it.

Gaara seemed to be interested with everything that was around him so far – unlike the sand, that seemed to be interested only in bottles of perfumes, patiently chewing on glass to add it to the mass of minerals and making it more shiny and also drinking the perfumes up. Soon, not only carpet, but also sand reeked of old smells from forgotten ages and seemed to be very content about it as it smiled just for itself and didn't even try to look at Minato or the kid. Gaara on the other hand, caught the sash with hands and tried to do everything that he could do with such things – which meant gnawing at it, trying to rip it and winding up himself in it until his neck was in grave danger, and the sand seemed to ignore it. Just as easily he unwinded himself from it, before even Minato could react. Finally, he seemed to get satisfied once it went on his arm, like a real sash from the mister universum and stayed that way, too long and colorful. Green eyes looked at Minato and observed him quietly. Then he patted him on the cheek and laid down, just near it. He seemed to be finally calmed down about what's was happening.

That's how the kazekage saw them. And lords, did he pale.

'What are you doing to my wife's wardrobe?' he muttered, looking with horror at broken bottles and clothes in mess.

When the baby finally tired himself out of touching everything, Minato sighed a little in relief and wrapped the scarf around him, thinking that if he was comfortable in this temperature, it was probably chilly for him. He ignored the sand- apparently the less he thought abut I and the teeth-jarring sound the crystal being roughly crushed to bits made (or what the monster might want it for) the best for his sanity. He was on his way back to sit on the bed when he the older redhead startled him, pulling the baby closer as he stared at him. At the words, the younger man similarly lost what little color he had on his face.

'I'm… I'm so sorry. That thing-' he pointed at the sand 'It just jumped all over it and broke it, I was over there. I just got something for the baby because it was already broken and it was sort of ruined anyway-'

He was babbling, he knew. He didn't care much either. His wife's clothing- Gaara's mother clothing? They had given him the woman's room, an her things were still there?

According to customs in Fire country, one of them was that when someone died, you got rid of their things and preferably move out if they had died in the house. You gave them away, you buried them with them, you made a pyre or tossed it to the river- you didn't *keep* things from a dead person. As much as he had loved Kushina, and as much as it had hurt at the moment, he had done exactly that, only keeping the things she would have wanted Naruto to have. It was part o a perfectly natural mourning process, and to keep their things was just… creepy.

Minato had never been a particularly religious man, but to know he as in some place that probably had probably been altered last by a woman that wasn't alive anymore- a woman that had been sacrificed to the damned thing eating her perfume- just made him feel ill. What was whoever put him there thinking?

Daichi had only tsked in disgust and fisted his hands so tightly the bones in them cracked. For a moment he looked like if he could punch someone, but he didn't move from the spot. Instead, he looked at the sand that didn't seem to even notice him and moved over it, kicking at the minerals and sending them flying everywhere, fast, but not far away.

'What a mess.' he muttered through his gritted teeth 'Only problems with this kid. What a goddamn mess.'

All scarves of Karura, all her perfumes and even occasional jewelry got mixed with the sand and even stopped existing as this mindless trash bin gnawed at it, like a kid at candies. He flared his teeth as it started going through his fingers, not hurting him, but trying to take away the bottles he had gathered. Problem after problem after problem…

He flicked it off with an angry gesture and started folding the clothes, all in complete silence. Gaara observed him with interest as both bottles and his fingers threw lights around the room, but only broke in squeal as Daichi came toward him and tore the scarf of his neck, without much care, making his head yank to the side. It didn't seem to bother Daichi the least.

'I came to assist you with the monster.' he muttered, his voice full of regret as he folded the last pieces of clothes and took out the drawer that seemed to be broken. He noticed the music box, took it in his hand, thinking about something, then threw it away to the corner, where an old, covered in dust plain trash bin stood. The drawer, somehow, got closed, even if the break could be visible on the outside 'Do you want me to bring you something to drink?'

'What the hell is your problem?' Minato gave him a bewildered look, completely ignoring what the other had said. In a moment, he was sitting in bed, tilting the baby's had and carefully feeling his neck. 'Were you trying to break his neck?'

Daichi looked back at him with blank face. It was just a cover though, and a very visible cover – the tone of his voice almost bubbled with pending up emotions.

'This thing doesn't die so easily.' he muttered and looked at Gaara who liked the caress very much, almost pushing at fingers with animalistic kind of affection 'Nor it does hurt. Stop being so worked over him.'

A pause, a moment to get up.

'So do you want something to drink or not? We're going to spend here whole night, so better ask now, I'm not moving out of here later.'

'Are you deaf? Didn't you hear the way he cried?' Okay, so he sand hadn't attacked the man, but that didn't mean that the man terrifying the baby didn't count as hurting him. How could he say he didn't feel it? 'With your permission, your highness, I think that while I'm the one in first line to get mauled because of something you did, I think I will care. Don't do that again.'

He gave the little redhead another look, fingers stroking the impossibly smooth cheek. He didn't seem hurt, or even that traumatized. Short attention span or just being used to such treatment?

'…some tea would be nice, but I can get it on my own.'

'That's your wish.' said Daichi and looked at the baby. Gaara didn't look back, completely engulfed in the feeling of the touch of the man. As Minato moved his fingers to the cheek, he tried with all his might to get them in his mouth. The sand on the floor swayed, like a piece of grass on uneven wind and tried crawling away gods know where. The redhead closed the door, making it slump on the floor. 'Suit yourself.'

He didn't address the fact of treating the baby; Minato seemed to be oversensitive to him, concerned by things he didn't bother even with his other children. But he decided to dismiss it as another thing Konoha brought in the people. Minato wasn't sure if he should thank the man in a sincere or sarcastic way, so he once again decided to imitate an Uchiha by just nodding in what they usually considered to be an appreciative way. He looked down at the baby, worried about the less than stellar state of his hands - then decided that the least of this particular baby's worries were if he had washed his hands before he put them in his mouth or not.

Since he was getting the tea himself, he decided he could live without having it for a few more hours, especially since he wasn't sure if he could get up again just now. He looked at the Kazekage out of the corner of his eye, but the man seemed content to stay glued to the door as if he were planning to get between him and getting out (which wouldn't surprise him).

'You do know I can't stay here as his personal toy for the rest of my life.'

'And you're aware of that it's not me who decided he likes you.' said Daichi, putting his hands in his usual, defensive pose of crossed arms 'You're staying in Suna anyway, you can as well entertain him if you decided to get around his life.'

'I can't stay here forever.' The blonde repeated emphatically, almost as if he were explaining some very important concept to a very small child 'I have to get back to my own son.'

'You should have thought about it before you got my son attached to your own hip.' said Daichi and looked at the ceiling 'Your son will be taken care of with help of nannies that couldn't keep up with Gaara. Take their responsibility.'

'Are you sure you can afford to pay me as a Jiinchuriki nanny?' the blonde said, lips splayed in a toothy grin. 'I'd rather take care of my own son.'

He was living in this hell just so he could ensure it. Giving it to someone else to take care of was the last thing he intended to do.

'Are you sure you can afford throwing my people into poverty?' asked the redhead, closing his eyes 'Every penny you will get won't be spent on the irrigation of the dry grounds, and we have dry year. I personally don't really care if they survive or not, Suna is at the verge of sinking anyway; just think if you can bear with their death on your mind.'

The blonde's expression didn't change. What? Suna wanted to play 'emotionally blackmail the Konohanin' now?

'That's hardly my problem is it? If you want a work well done, something of equal value must be given. As far as I'm concerned, finally letting go of this village would be doing it a favor. This is worse than living on siege.'

'And where else would we all go?' said Daichi, not opening his eyes. 'It's hard to be homesick, but it's much worse to not have place to come back to because it doesn't exist.'

'No, not really.' the younger man said, looking down at the baby in his arms. He yanked at the covers under him with unnecessary strength and wrapped them lightly around him. Moving to Konoha had been the best thing that ever happened to him. His village had been falling apart because of the war by the time he was born, and after his parents died, Minato had only been too happy to try his luck in a new place.

'You? I don't know who would take you-' not after what the man had done '-but your people, Konoha would take… maybe 1/6th of them. The rest could easily move to minor villages. They'd be happy from strengthening their lines. And I doubt the desert is going away anytime soon, if you feel like visiting.'

'I was born in this village and I will be buried in it, thank you very much.' said Daichi, opening his eyes and looking at the blonde 'That's my duty as a kage and also sense of patriotism. And I'm not the only one who feels that way. Why do you think nobody had moved out yet? Those who wanted to get away already did.'

His eyes fell on a baby that gurgled at the covering and took the material in his hands, curious of the texture of new coat.

'Though some will move when it will come out who steers with this village again.'

Minato only raised his eyebrows in a what that he hoped was illustrative enough to mean that he didn't believe everyone who wanted to leave had, or that many would leave when they found out about the jinchuuriki.

'…how did you even manage to keep quiet about it for almost a year? You told the other nations you had a jinchuuriki, yet your village doesn't know it. And as far as I understand I, this isn't the first time crazy there-' he made a gesture with his chin towards the sand, who now seemed intent on rubbing against the walls for no discernible reason '-decides to sink extra parts of the village.'

'Apparently, Suna is so poor it can't afford good architects.' muttered the redhead, looking down at the sand that seemed to act pretty silly for its usual standards. He wondered what could that mean. Hopefully, nothing out of range of usual danger 'And if you have loyal people, the secret stays a secret. When I forbade everyone to look inside my house, I didn't see anyone unwanted entering the cellar until you came.'

Minato didn't twitch, even though the man was right here and he shouldn't really even bother with trying to say he wasn't right. Only he didn't feel like admitting such a thing if his life depended on it. At all.

'I was just following orders.' he said uninterestedly, as if it didn't matter. 'And either way, this would have happened sooner or later. What when he starts teething? I don't know much about kids, but I can tell you mine's very intent on expressing how unhappy he is about the situation.'

'I don't know what happens when he starts teething. Never had to take care of teething demon child.' answered Daichi quite truthfully, though not without a twitch of eyebrow. The idea of having to bear with storm twenty four hours per seven made him feel cold sweat all over his body. Not to mention what would happen once he would start learn walking and trying to walk into dangers. Or get sick with something much more serious than stomach aches. 'I guess we will have to use the emergency plan and treat it as national catastrophe. Pretty ironic when I think about it.'

'And what's the plan for national catastrophe?' The blonde asked amusedly 'Massive suicide? Why aren't you even trying to get someone to fix this mess? I practically had to force Wren to so much as attempt to correct my draft of seal pattern, and he wasn't happy about it either. You have a cabinet full of seals that working or not, could be used to try and figure something better than this out!' he pointed at the sand emphatically. It seemed to have moved back to where the perfumes had fallen first, and rubbed at the carpet in the area like a sniffing dog or a cat trying to mark territory.

'Move underground, as it's the only way you can escape the storm.' muttered Daichi. Of course, in case of Shukaku it was very suicidal, because he could easily bury them all alive like that. Normal storms didn't try to move underground after all. 'Fixing the seal is something that had already killed dozen of the best sealers I had in this village, one after another. For now we keep the matter shut as we don't have anyone with enough knowledge to play with it. And you're valuable enough to be kept away from possible death.'

Daichi once again looked at the sand, trying to… do something with the carpet and annoyed, kicked at it. It spread wide again, but didn't seem to hold it against him. Gaara followed Minato's finger with a gaze and let out a sound that seemed to imitate Minato's tone of voice in last words. Then he looked around and put his hand into his mouth. The blonde sighed and curled his finger slightly inside the redhead's mouth, making something between a disgusted wince and laugh at the slimy baby tongue curling around it.

'That's too bad for you, then. I'm the best there is.' Very carefully, he put an arm around Gaara and gave him a tentative push so he'd lay on his side, because holding him against his neck was getting tiring. 'You should contact the Uzumakis. They work for hire now.'

Daichi sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

'I don't know any Uzumakis and I'm not even sure where to search for them.' he said, trying to not look too concerned. He did try, in the past, but it was fruitless 'Besides, this is only a matter of Sunagakure, not Uzumakis or any other clan from outside of Wind country.'

The little redhead complied to the push, laying at the side, but not letting go of the finger. It seemed to satisfy him just like a dummy.

'And if you know how to seal him why don't you do it?'

'You do know one. My son is an Uzumaki.' The blonde said, giving a sigh of relief and leaning tiredly, at least Gaara was swilling to let him relax a bit '…me too, I guess. Or I was supposed to be.'

Daichi looked up at him, then groaned. A moment later he was out of the room. Not longer than three seconds later, that followed by something that sounded like punching the wall, he reentered the room with the same facial expression.

'That's great news.' he said.

Minato jerked his face in the wall's direction when he heard a dry thump, bits of sand falling from the raw places Shukaku had rubbed against and joining the mess on the floor. The monster took it with equanimity.

'I'm …sure they are.' he said carefully, going back to inspecting what Gaara was trying to do with his finger and his mouth 'I was wondering why you hadn't said anything when I introduced you to him, if you were so interested on them.'

'Tiredness.' said Daichi 'And then it flew out of my mind. I live quite a busy life, you see.'

'Noted.'

Minato wasn't very sure what made him say what he did next time. It certainly wasn't pity, because he doubted that the older redhead would ever be able to stir such an emotion from him. But maybe- just maybe - it was the fact that if this deadly, sweet baby in his arms had been Naruto, he would have wanted help. Any help in the world.

'…I could contact them, you know?' he said as casually as possible, still fussing over the baby so he wouldn't have to look at the older man. '…but they'll want everything you can give them on regards of the sealing methods and take it with them, and take it with them. Uzumaki's live for seals, and I've never seen anything like the ones used here.'

'What do you think, do I look like I'm sleeping on money daily? I barely can afford a fridge to work three days in a week.' muttered Daichi, now visibly annoyed 'I don't need a bunch of greedy sealers fussing around and taking the rests of what I have, especially if it's not their business. You're one here and you're already no help, why would I trust the bigger bunch of you.'

'Uh- because you *have* to?' the blonde sarcastically asked, voice low and disbelieving. How could the man be placing some stupid secret that did him no good over the lives of his apparently-just-as-stubborn villagers? 'You know, I don't get you. I don't get you or anyone here. You just gave up on life or something- and no one here seems to try anything! It's like if you stop trying to make things change out of fear they will get out even worse… And you know what? If you don't do anything, things are going to get worse weather you try to do damage control or not. Your *one* chance is to try to make things better. You already messed up. Now it's your responsibility to fix them, any way you can.'

There was no way to measure how uncomfortable saying this made Minato, especially because of how close to home each word stuck. Minato had had to make a choice- several of them, actually. And he wasn't happy about it, but he knew he had no one to blame but himself. And more than anything, he knew if there was one single person in this world who shouldn't suffer because of those choices, that was his son.

He was being hard on the redhead, but he felt perfectly entitled. Suna had never been a particularly powerful village, but it had been able to hold its own before the man had thought it was a great idea to start a war with all the over ninja villages, practically at the same time. He turned around so he was facing the wall, surprisingly dark lashes closing over his eyes as he let out a long breath. He was out of breath, out of will. He was too tired and just damn depressed to care about anything anymore. He wanted to sleep and wake up in another rifle.

'…and you should know. If you treat a baby like a monster, it won't matter how sweet he is, he'll eventually turn into one. And it won't be because he was born like one or because your little sand pet turned him, it will be because you made him into one.'

'Says who.' said Daichi, starring back openly at Minato, his gaze clearly ready to take it on, even if Minato turned his back on him 'Don't preach to me, you ex-kage, like if you stood in the better ground! You tell me to repair my mistakes like if your nice vacations in other country did anything to repent your sins! I did a lot to fix it, I have nothing to be ashamed of!'

He took a step forward, while Gaara opened his eyes wide and looked at Minato, his features bewildered, obviously sensing a danger nearby. The sand, even if it still acted weirdly, stopped and spiked up like a hedgehog made of sand.

'Once a monster, always a monster and if there's anything 'sweet' in him then my eye is blind to it's charm. I find death and murder repulsive, for I've seen a lot and lived through a lot.'

Minato didn't turn around, but he did curl more on himself and away from the redhead, unwilling to let him see his expression or how this conversation affected him. It wasn't like him to be so open about such things, and he didn't know if he should flame the heat, the tiredness or fever.

'My 'nice vacations' are not your business, Kazekage-sama.' the blonde said icily pulling the baby closer, arms wrapped around him in a protective gesture. 'You were only too happy to get me in exchange for money, so don't act like if you know anything about me or what I am like.'

He was doing the right thing. He couldn't allow himself doubt about that, because something that felt disturbingly close to his sanity might depend on that resolution.

'Now if you'll excuse me, I think I need a rest. I need to have this baby changed as soon as I have enough chakra for it.' And he pulled the blankets closer, despite the fact he wasn't cold at all- the extra layer just made him feel better against the man's dark eyes. '…if you can, please get the annotations I left at the ANBU office. I'll need them.'

'All your time is my business as my soldier and if you have problem with that you can search for a job outside the ninja quarters.' aanswered Daichi dryly, crossing his arms even tighter 'Only because you give the funds doesn't put you in position to scold me for anything.'

And with that and not any more words he left the room, not even thinking about getting ANBU annotations or anything like that. The man had the nerve to ask about something like that, like if there was no service in this house to do that. Sure, he had got broken both of his hands, but had it ever stopped him from anything? He doubted that even if Yashamaru had broken spine he would learn to walk anyway. It didn't matter if the man wanted anything – he wanted his own tea and after that he was going back to look over the pair, no more, no less. He had almost tripped on Kankuro when he was trying to bring his tea back, but the kid scurried away before he could even hiss at him. At least this one had learned its place fast enough.

Minato didn't answer, even though a retort was on the tip of his tongue. He didn't know why he even bothered, because it wasn't like if the man would listen to him either way, or magically change the way he acted. He didn't move from his position, even though the idea of the man having left him alone again scared him because staying awake was getting kind of hard. Thankfully, the man returned shortly after, even if neither addressed the other, Minato was glad he did.


	11. 11

Minato thought it would take more effort to fall asleep with someone like the Kazekage right next to him, but it wasn't hard at all. In his current state, not even the baby's squirming was enough to keep him up a moment longer.

Daichi, along his promise, did observe Minato and Gaara while they layed in bed, more or less vigilantly. At one point Gaara seemed to want to fall asleep so he had woken him up with a sharp tug, making the sand chase him for awhile, but at least keeping the kid's attention spark wide. After three hours he had went out, leaving Baki in charge as he went to sign the papers himself and to look how the house building went, and also to look up how the damages were counted up. After five hours and a half he was back and he changed Baki, who reported to him that Gaara had learned to sing or something stupid like that. He dismissed it along with the ninja and went back to observing the pair, along with reading some old and boring book about mythical flowers that could grow even on hard stones and fed hungry and thirsty.

Minato had woken up while Baki was there. He'd done so with fuzzy head, a dry throat and a baby who seemed very happy to see him awake, but other than getting up to make himself some tea and going to the bathroom, he'd gone straight back to sleep after getting Gaara to drink some more water. The second time he woke up, his fever seemed to have gone down some, at least enough for him to feel good enough to be thankful for the medicine his familiar had made him drink some hours ago. He hoped Gamakijou was taking good care of Naruto, but supposed he would have been told if something bad had happened. Gamakijou might be small, but he could summon other toads if needed. He concentrated in the baby he currently held in his arms instead, who seemed just as pleased with having him awake again as he had been before.

'Hello, Little Red.' he said lightly, changing him from an arm that he barely felt anymore to the other, closing and opening the hand to get blood circulation back running. 'Ready to get changed?'

The kazekage seemed to have returned at some point, and he was wearing different clothes than the last time he had seen him. They were rather simple, as if to contrast with the rings on his hands, but they suited his coloration. The redhead mumbled something in toddlerese, trying to climb up toward the face of Minato, from where the voice that had been silent for last few hours came. It hypnotized him, making him feel warm and safe, so once it was back he couldn't keep from feeling giddy – and bouncing over it. Instead of wild flailing though he made the sand jump and down as a big bouncing ball, making loud noises no bouncable object would make. Daichi frowned over it, not tearing his eyes from the book.

'Either take him to the slaughter room or take out furniture from this one before bathing him. And don't use water for it.'

Minato smiled lightly and helped the baby climb closer, nuzzling him lightly. He didn't look at the man either.

'I am going to need at least some water to get him clean. And help. And those seals I asked for. And if that cream you gave me a while ago for his stomach also can be used on his genitals, that would be much appreciated. '

'The salve I gave you before is for internal pains, not external ones. Why do you want to use it over his genitals anyway?' said the older man, putting the book away as he looked at him with a frown 'I can come to assist you, but if you want to use water, you need to seal all the sand away. That's not possible. '

Minato gave the man a look. It wasn't necessarily an angry one, more like displeased surprise.

'…because he's got diaper rash, and that's very uncomfortable for babies.' Minato said, using his now working hand to rub the baby's back lightly. 'I thought it was because of the heat, but it's because he never gets changed.'

'Children get such things all the time in this place.' said the man, shrugging a bit and getting up from the chair 'Every house have a powder for this. I'm going to bring it with the seals, but don't start without anyone around.'

And with that, he went out of the door. Gaara looked after him and got back to looking at Minato, expecting more petting from him. He was still passive about it and just kept starring at him if he wanted it. But this time he decided to try to catch Minato by lower lip to get his attention to him. He had almost succeeded.

'I'm just saying it's probably healthier for everyone who handles him not to accidentally brush against those.' he didn't try to start a fight or fight about it because, strangely enough the man agreed right away. The baby's small swats did indeed get his attention, and he caught the small hand in his.

'What is it now, Gaara?'

The redhead froze, holding lightly on the finger that was in his hand now, looking at Minato, patient and expecting. However, just as his attention span, his patience was short lived.

'Awaaah!' he whined, trying to put his head higher than his spine allowed him. Then he tried to grab Minato's lips again, this time with other hand. Not knowing what to think of that, Minato grabbed him under the arms and pulled him up. Generally, when Naruto did that, it was because he wanted to 'stand up' as much as his wobbly legs would allow him to.

'This?'

The redhead looked at him and then at his feet, clearly confused by what was happening. Nobody before did something like that to him and he didn't know what to do with it. But as far as it didn't hurt he stilled and slowly adjusted to the new body position in silence. Then he looked up at Minato and waited for him to stop with these weird plays and to finally do what he wanted.

'…no?'

Well, the baby didn't seem to be particularly happy about any of this. At least he wasn't complaining? At loss, he pulled him closer so they were practically nose to nose, and pressed his forehead lightly against the redhead.

'You know, if you really are almost a year old, you should start talking soon, right? I'm sure it would do wonders for our communication.'

At that, Gaara once again stilled, looking almost cross-eyed into Minato's face. It was a bit overdoing it for him, but yes, they were getting to what was on his mind pretty nicely. With a slight huff he closed both of his eyes and pushed lightly back at the forehead of the man, leaning with his head on him – and once again, waited for the caress. Surely, the idea of talking went past his ears smoothly, not even noticed. So far the screaming got him what he wanted pretty well, why should he had imitated any other noises?

'Aww, you want a cuddle, baby?' Really? That was all? With a light chuckle, Minato nuzzled back against the baby's forehead, then let him rest back against his chest, one hand going to his hair and stroking the small head lightly.

'Happy now?'

The child made a noise that could be distinguished as 'satisfied after good sex' and leaned against Minato with his whole body, once again pancaking against his chest. Obviously, the kneading through his hair was more than he expected, because he soon had opened his eyes to look at the hand, not moving, but observing it with lowered eyelids. That was what he liked about the big blonde man. Especially that.

At this very moment the other redhead decided to come in with his treasures, however Gaara didn't seem to mind the intrusion. As long as the man kept on doing what he did. Minato laughed at the reaction - apparently not only did jinchuuriki loved the scent of mint, they also had a sleeper hold on the back of their head, because Naruto also loved to have it stroked like that-

That made him blink and pull a little away to look at the infant, not stopping the light rubbing at the scalp. He turned to look at the sand, but it was just piles on the floor by the moment.

'…hey.'

The redhead didn't answer, for a moment eyeing the kid with a light frown on his face. Then he showed a very plain basket of even plainer supplies, that seemed to be the utensils for the bath. They looked utterly new, one was even unpacked, but if one looked closer, they were actually covered in dust. As it came, water baths were not happening very often in this house. Gaara didn't react neither to gesture or new objects, only looked up at Minato at the pull. The sand lazily waved from the side to the side and stilled again.

'Hey…' he said again, making obvious it hadn't been a greeting as much as a way to get his attention. '…the sand's letting me touch his head.'

It shouldn't have been such a surprise, except it actually was. The sand didn't seem to mind any sort of nuzzling or Minato touching the baby's cheeks or face when he cleaned him, but when he'd tried to cradle the back of his head back when he'd first been forced to keep him in his arms, he'd swatted at every try he'd made. He tried to remember when had been the first time he'd done it without retaliation and couldn't… back when the creature was gone and Minato had been taking of the doll-like baby?

Daichi looked at him again, a bit of surprise showing on his face, but it swayed away quickly as he tightened his lips. What was there to be happy about? The kid could be nice sometimes, but that didn't make him any less of a killer.

'Then don't yank his hair out.' he muttered and went out of the room, going to the bathroom where actually water flew through the tape. Minato rolled his eyes at the idiotic comment, then gave the baby one last nuzzle and got up, or at least tried to. As usual, when he actually got to his feet, the gravity source tried to shift some good sudden 35º to the left, leaving him grabbing the nightstand to compensate.

What the hell. He had no idea what was wrong with this country, but it seemed that ever since he'd gotten here, getting up after laying for a while made him dizzy. He rubbed at his face lightly, then reached for another honey candy, only to find them all gone. Apparently he'd gone through the batch he kept on himself already.

'I don't suppose you keep any candy on yourself, huh?' Of course, the baby didn't, so the blonde was left to wait until the wave of dizziness went away before following Daichi into the bathroom. The redhead only made some kind of piping noise, like if he actually tried to answer the question, but it didn't mean anything at all. Just the reaction to words tossed at him. However, when they came close to the bathroom, green eyes opened wide and looked at the blonde, wide awake. Then he looked at the door behind which Daichi vanished and instead of the door a big wall of sand suddenly appeared, covering the entrance all at once.

Minato stared at the wall for a moment.

'…guess that answers my question.' Apparently baby hadn't had very good experiences concerning water. Now how the hell did he work on this? 'Gaara, baby?' he said in his sweetest, most coaxing tone. It didn't work much with Naruto, but he didn't lose anything by trying. 'I need you to put this down, can you do it?' he pointed at the sand, then at the floor, all the while making a movement opposite of elevation with his hand. The redhead didn't understand the command and didn't react to it. He had only stared at the wall, with wide opened eyes as Daichi simply punched a hole in it, then curled close to Minato, finding comfort in the sugary sweet tone of voice.

'I'm not sure what are you trying to talk with him like if he understood anything, but better go now, until the sand is not trying to rise again.'

'Well, of course he doesn't understand, he's too small for that.' the blonde said, looking at the thick layers of sand on the floor as he obligingly put his other arm also around the baby, rubbing at it lightly. He took a step back to give the older man some room to move, while looking inside- yep, same exact bathroom from before- he'd been into it more than a few times with Gaara, and he'd never reacted like this before- not even the first day, when he'd just taken him out of the cradle and taken him here to clean his snotty face.

'What did you do to him here to make him act like this?'

'Molested him.' was the sarcastic answer as the man turned his back on him and started unpacking things from the basket. One of them, he had put aside, the rest was cleaned with the back of his hand from the dust. 'I washed him in lukewarm water a few times, because I couldn't let him lay covered in dry blood as the maggots started to breed.'

'…gross.'

If Minato had sounded any more juvenile with such a comment, it would probably have involved physical effort on his part. As it was, he just made a face more suited to a five year old being told that girl that kissed him just passed him cooties.

'So, how do we go about this?' he asked, letting Gaara tuck his head under his chin as he rubbed the back of his head. 'I tried those seals I gave you, but they are not working as well as I expected them to.'

He shrugged and leaned against the wall at an inclined enough angle he could keep the baby up with one arm without risking him accidentally trying to throw himself off just long enough to pull out the seal in question. He frowned at it.

'It does seem to disorient the sand without spending too much chakra, but takes some time to work in full effect. I probably left some connector open, but I haven't been able to figure out where yet.'

The older man turned around and looked at him for a moment, like if he was measuring his height. Then he got back to reading one of the faint and almost invisible instructions on the bottle.

'I don't have whole day for such things, but I also am not willing to lose my head over a hurry.' he muttered and opened the thing to sniff at the contents. It started smelling of faint chamomile. 'I can't guarantee you won't lose a limb trying though.'

And he didn't have to repeat it twice. The baby had curled under Minato's skin like an abused animal and started shivering, while the sand from the door had fell down to the floor. A moment later it shot at his hand and tore the seal in the middle of the paper, making it invalid.

'Shoo, you.' the blonde said irritated, quickly producing another seal and sticking it to Gaara's nape without waiting for the sand to try to break this one as well. He held it in place with his hand for several seconds, and only removed it once sure the seal had activated. Once used, he removed it and passed it to the Kazekage to inspect it.

'Come on baby, it's just a bit of water, it will do you good, don't you trust me?' He asked gently, giving the baby's forehead a little bump, followed by a nuzzle. Gaara didn't respond to that – well, not as well as expected. Sure, the nuzzle felt good, but now he seemed to be torn between feeling good and the fear that seemed to grow as the sand stilled – even if it still clung stubbornly to Minato's shoes even if it couldn't move anymore. Green eyes looked at him, then shifted to the side, first left, then right, then closed and Gaara broke the nuzzle, curling into Minato again with a quiet whimper. Daichi didn't seem to even consider what was going on, he had only turned the tap on and started filling one bucket, and then, changed it with a small bathtub that seemed to know better times, simply because wood started showing from underneath the cheap paint that was definitely out of the fashion three seasons ago. And knowing desert had no definable seasons it was quite some time ago. The longer it took the more Gaara shivered, and finally, broke into whimpering that wasn't crying simply because he seemed to be too startled to try to do that.

'Aw. It'll be just a moment, baby.' Minato said, holding Gaara closer and rubbing at his back. He looked at the sand, but it was only after another moment that he decided to take out two extra seals and stuck them to the baby's neck. Better safe than sorry, now that he actually had some to use. He still felt tired, but comparatively much better than before. Getting up also seemed to have cleared most of his headache, and save the insistent and faintly pulsing throw somewhere deep down in his skull, he almost felt normal. Sun was provably setting, not that he could tell in this windowless room.

'What's all that stuff for?'

He recognized the soap and the things to change the baby's diaper, and one of those things was probably what the redhead had said was used for diaper rash, but the rest of the things he had been looking at, he had no idea.

'The one in green stickers is shampoo.' Answered the kazekage as he laid down the bathtub and took the bucket, starting to adding the water to the one in it 'The one without stickers is an oil for skin shine and disinfection and the one in the fat bottle is a salve for skin to not get dry too fast and to not be damaged by usual baths.'

And with usual he meant 'sand baths' of course. The water in bathtub swirled and let out a cloud of boiling mist, making the room smelling of insides of boiling pot. The redhead looked at it and opened one of the bottles, making the room smell of sandalwood. A moment later the water was almost yellow from it and started bubbling up on its own, even if there was no additional movement. Gaara stopped shivering and looked at it – in silence. Then, he hid again in Minato's chest and started crying. Minato nodded, interested enough to get the fat bottle and try to read the label on the back despite how faded it was. The scent was faintly familiar, something vaguely pleasant, if kind of edgy that he had smelled on someone recently - probably Yashamaru. That reminded him he hadn't seen anything of the man since the previous day, despite having heard him.

He thought of asking, but he wasn't really interested enough to actually go through it. He gave the sand a half-hearted kick, and most of it loosened right away. It tried to crawl back and cling to him, but it didn't seem to be able to stick into anything- neither his skin or sandals or even the sand that was still packed in place.

'What happened yesterday, with the second storm?'

When the storm had started, he had been lying on the couch with Naruto and hadn't really had much willpower to actually look outside, and when the Kazekage had taken him to his house, the sandstorm made difficult to see anything further than maybe a meter away from him. It had only raged for maybe forty minutes, maybe an hour tops, but after the disaster that had been the previous one, there was no saying how much damage it could have inflicted.

'The geography of the desert was mauled and all our new maps are as good as trashes picked up on the streets.' muttered the redhead and looked at Minato 'There's also some more damage at the uncovered areas, including suffocation of citizens who couldn't get out fast enough, but that's the usual with old and young.'

Which didn't make it any less gruesome, but he couldn't spend time on mourning over every lost life. He looked at the water as he touched it with fingers. The temperature seemed to be just right.

'The clock at the centre of the town was damaged.' he muttered 'And some parts of the town don't have electricity. The water is right, put him in.'

Gaara, who didn't stop crying even at the shushing, didn't react to those words only because he didn't understand them. But that didn't make him any more willing. Minato looked at the man for a second or two, wondering if he really actually needed to tell the man that at this rate, Suna was going to die on itself in less than two years, but decided the man probably knew it better than most. And he really didn't feel like starting another fight, so he just grabbed the baby and gently pried him away.

It wasn't easy, even without the sand to cling to him, because even as loose as it was, Gaara was clinging to him for dear life now. At least being able to actually remove him from his person and being able to set him off without ending up with torn parts made removing the diaper and wiping the baby off considerable easier than having to do it with him practically strapped to his chest. He wasn't very sure if the older redhead was going to do this or not, so after a moment of hesitation, he made a vague, half-hearted gesture of giving the crying child to him.

The other man didn't even flinch at what was happening, he had only watched as Gaara started wailing at the removal of the diaper; the sight of the rashed bottom of his youngest son did not make him even blink – he saw worse things in his life. He watched as Gaara sobbed at wiping, taking care of the diaper as he tied it in a knot, so it wouldn't disturb them with a smell (well, not that much – in the end, Gaara still drank only milk). He looked at the man as he offered the kid to him though and hesitated from taking him for a moment. After a moment of silence, however, he did and put him in the bathtub filled with water.

The response was immediate – Gaara screamed like if he was put in fire, and at that, the immobile sand jumped up and hit Minato's back, trying to get into the bathtub – but it only managed to fall down and writhe like a dying fish. Minato winced at the high tone, wondering how Gaara's throat could already be well enough to produce such shrillness after the way he had been crying just the previous day. Probably jinchuuriki healing factor, which made him at least somewhat hopeful the inflamed disaster in the baby's bottom would heal fast enough.

He dusted off some of the grains sticking to the neck of his shirt, and when that didn't seem to work well enough, simply removed it, mindful of his sore back and ribs. He took a moment to throw his shirt on the rack and fish his necklace from under the black tank when it caught on his fishnet shirt, then reached for the baby, brushing a finger gently down his check, then grabbed him around his torso to keep him upright.

'What do you want me to do?

Daichi looked back at him and let go of the kid. Gaara immediately tried to grab on the Minato's hand and tried to climb up it. As far away from the water as possible.

'If you're using the water, then use it till the last drop.' said the man. 'Wash him with water, then you can use liquid soap you have in this bottle.' he said, putting thin on in front of him 'Don't forget to wash his face and ears, and of course, hair. Here's shampoo and the sponge.'

The sponge seemed to be grey, but at the movement a bit of blue showed up, making it obvious it was one of the least used things in this house.

'Then there's the salve for dry skin, use it while he is still wet, also on hair. But if it gets to his eyes, ears or nose, you have to wash it out properly, or he would be blind for several days, or worse – unable to hear or breathe. Here's the powder for rash, and here's the towel you can use to dry him after you use the salve. Don't use the normal towel for this, you will get it oily.'

Which meant that the other towel was almost leaking from oil. The hygiene, as much as it seemed to be kept at appropriate level, was now being put at a rather big stake now, but the redhead didn't seem to be seeing it. He looked around and fished out a clean diaper, making all white things hide in shame with how clean the white uncovered in dust looked like.

'You can make him wear this after everything. I don't have clean shirt for him, but I can bring one. I will toss out the diaper on my way. I will be right back.'

And with that, he left.

'Hey- hey, where are you going?' The worse would probably be applied better to the father, but the older redhead only got a slight nod in response for his words. Minato was actually referring to Gaara, who despite his rather fragile appearance had enough muscle strength to nearly climb to his elbow before he could still it and make him sit down in the tub again.

'Baby, we are on a mission and you have to stay calm for this, all right?' of course, reasoning didn't work very well with infants and all Minato got for his effort was some red scratches on his arm, one of which budded with a few pinpricks of blood for the moment it took for platelets to stop it. 'Sheesh… are all baby's nails this sharp, or are you and Naruto special like that?' he asked while he kept the baby steady. Gaara didn't know a thing about sharpness of babies nails, but he surely made a good use of his. Even if he couldn't climb up Minato's arm, he fought for at least not being left alone in the tub and water – so he clawed at the man like a cat… in the water.

A moment later Daichi was back, the shirt in his hand seemed to be in a bit more exciting colors than the previous one – probably die being not worn or actually clean. When he closed door, he looked at the sand (didn't calm down) and then at the blonde.

'Go on, I'm watching.'

The blonde hissed, narrowly avoiding another new set of scratches as he cupped the back of the baby's head and poured some of the water from the tub to wash off the shampoo.

'Think you can get me something to clip his nails when we are done? He practically needs to be declawed.'

He hadn't given it a passing thought before, but Gaara's nails where definitely a little too long. It wasn't like if he would hurt himself with them because the sand would protect him, but at least Minato wasn't up for getting endlessly scratched whenever the baby got exited or scared.

He finished cleaning Gaara's ears as carefully as possible – Gaara was just as enthusiastic about water on his ears as Naruto, only the redhead whined his discomfort while his own son generally just shouted angrily - and straightened him back up in the water.

'There, was that so terrible?'

Gaara answered him with another pitiful sob that could only mean he was banished to the worst of fates and suffered for biggest half of the world, himself being alone and scared in the dark. Then, he clawed at Minato's hand, ready to dance out of the bathtub solely by climbing again. Daichi rolled his eyes at that and pushed him into the water by a single push.

'It would be easier to actually tear off his nails than clip them off.' he muttered as Gaara shouted like if he was mortally wounded, making the sand jump up again on a height of normal adult 'The sand crushes, chews and spits all scissors and nail clippers that get closer to him than five centimeters. I wonder why didn't he break one of his nails deep yet.'

But then, the answer was more than obvious – sand also protected curious hands from any damage and also – there was not many things Gaara could scratch his nails upon – he wasn't even doing much in a cradle.

'Why are you bullying the baby?' the blonde asked irritated, catching Gaara before he fell backward on the tub and started swallowing its contents. If he didn't know better, he'd think the man was taking advantage of the sand's current inability to coordinate. With a soft huff, he reached for the table, only to practically cringe away at the feeling of it. Yep, this definitely was the towel used for wiping oil off, no doubt about the oily material.

'Yeah, no.' taking a moment to wipe his hand on his pants, Minato reached for his discarded shirt and turned it inside out, using that to wrap the baby in it. After all, the last he needed in the desert heat was extra covering. The only reason he still wore long sleeves was because if the sun caught so much as an inch of bare skin on him, not only would he end with some rather painful burns, but also multitude of freckles on it. And it wasn't like if burns, freckles and sunlight would be any pressing concern any time soon in his situation.

'There, there, it's all over now. Clean and stuff.' he said soothingly, pulling Gaara close again and rubbing at his own shirt over Gaara's back, giving the redhead a bit of time to get over the obvious trauma of getting a ten minute bath. 'Maybe we can file his nails?'

Daichi looked at him, then at Gaara being tucked into a worn shirt. He quietly folded the oily towel in half, then another half without a word.

'If you have enough of patience and lack of fear, then go ahead.' he said, looking at the water that filled the bathtub. It was murky and surely showed that the person that was in it hasn't used water for long – in exchange, Gaara was whole wet and still crying, but surely white like he wasn't for a long time. The agonizing cries lowered down a little as the shirt clung to the redhead, letting the water dry, and they even silenced for a moment when he sneezed, but it seemed he was far from being calm. The moving motions that Minato was doing to him didn't seem to be calming him in one bit. The kazekage slowly rose the bathtub and walked away through the door.

'I'm going to use it properly.' he muttered as he went out 'Don't die when I'm out.'

Minato waited until the man was gone before giving his undivided attention back to the little redhead, pose more relaxed now.

'Aw, I'm sorry baby,' the blonde said apologetically, pressing his forehead to the baby's and giving him a nuzzle. 'I didn't mean to scare you.'

He sat on the side of the larger bathtub, Gaara safely cradled him in the crook of his arm and started finger combing the wet, red mess from his head. With how dark his hair looked now that it was wet, and combined with the impossible ivory of his skin, it looked like someone like if the baby was hemorrhaging.

'How can you be this pale?' Minato mused, trailing a long, pale blue vein down the baby's neck. 'Even I don't remember even being this pale. I don't I know anyone- no wait. Maybe Orochimaru-sensei. I'm not sure his was natural, though…'

He looked at the diaper things, then decided Gaara probably needed some more coddling instead. Besides, he needed to know if there was anything special about this powder thing the Kazekage had mentioned, because the bottle it came in didn't have any sort of stickers or hand written instructions. The redhead immediately turned toward the man's face as he nuzzled him, not really calming down, but finding immediate comfort in body touch – especially dry body touch. He didn't oppose against the finger brushing his hair, however, the position bugged him so he turned around until he was fully hiding his face in the crook of the hold. Only then he seemed to calm own – was it because he lost the world from vision or because of lack of air. The other man had returned shortly after that – empty bathtub in his hands, filled with a handful of sand. It seemed to be completely dry – both the bathtub and the sand. This didn't stop the man from scrubbing one against another.

'Why are you taking so long with dressing him up?' Daichi asked as he quickly rubbed off the wood from the walls of the bathing tool. 'If he is going to lay like that, he will fall asleep.'

Minato didn't think that 'the baby needed a bit of pampering' would be a satisfying answer for the man, so he just smiled a little.

'I wasn't sure about how to use this powder thing you gave me,' he said, even as he pulled Gaara back to laying against his chest so he was in an upright position. 'I can change him just fine, but I thought it would be better to be sure before doing something in the wrong order.'

The redhead frowned a bit, but said nothing. So, the man didn't even make him wear diaper yet? He was fussing with that kid more than some dogs did with their pups.

'There's no trick here, you lay him on the flat surface, apply powder and make sure it's spreaded on the whole rash, whether it's on his back or legs. It's the least invasive, so you don't need to rub it in or pour it all over.' A pause, the nasty sound of wood being torn off. 'Then you deal with him being a delicate primadonna for next twenty minutes and pray he doesn't decapitate you while his ass heals. That's all.'

'I see.' the blonde nodded, not seeming to mind or care how the movement only resulted in even more rubbing his cheek against the baby's temple. Apparently being caught fussing over a baby or what another man might think about it wasn't very high in his list of priorities. He looked at the sand groggily trying to pile on itself, then sighed and produced five more seals, which he proceeded to apply in a neat line all along the baby's spine.

'Check this now if you have the time.' he said, slowly peeling the first one once it activated, then leaving it on the side of the sink, at easy reach of the man. Once he waited a minute or two to give time for the imperfect seal to start working, he set down the towel he'd seen the ANBU use when they tried to change Gaara before and carefully laid him down. It cost him some nice new scratches on his neck, but what could one do with a jinchuuriki baby with unkempt claws?

Daichi looked at the seal, then took it in one sandy hand as he scrubbed the bottom of the bathtub with another. Then he frowned and bit at his pointing finger, making the blood appear. A moment later there was a few more smudges added all over it.

'You make such orthographic mistakes a first grader would be ashamed.' he muttered as he got back to rubbing the tub 'Other than that, I don't even know where are you going with this, so I have no suggestions.'

The smaller redhead piped up at that, flailing his hands toward the tall blonde, his eyes widening with fear. The sand on the floor twitched, reduced to vibrating against the tiles, and yet, it managed to make the stomping sound of a heavy boot falling on the floor. Gaara cried out at that and kicked the air, moving a bit to the right with his constant flailing.

'Whine whine whine.' the blonde said in a light amused manner. He caught the baby's hands in his and smiled lightly, internally wondering why did kids seem to want to fall down so enthusiastically. If there was a narrow corner to fall from, you could be sure they'd try to throw themselves from it, preferably head first.

'It works and wastes little chakra, so if it were so easy, you and your team of geniuses could have thought of it yourselves-' he looked at the redhead, and since he wasn't looking at him, sneaked closer to give the baby a quick kiss and a command to stay still. 'My sealing method is awesome and you know it.'

Gaara was clean already from his bath, so there was no need for any wiping, which the baby was probably rather thankful for. His pale skin only served to accent the difference in skin tone with the inflamed area on his bottom.

'Poor baby~' the blonde said softly, sincerely feeling for the little thing. And he still wanted to be held so badly he never fussed when he was picked up? His own son had so far had a few bouts of this, but nowhere near as bad. Minato had only seen something remotely like this when Kenta had accidentally fallen on a fresh batch of poisonous ivy. He was about to put the powder on the baby, but then if he was supposed to wait for it to make effect, it was probably a better idea to turn Gaara around so he was lying on his stomach. He carefully rolled him in the desired position and put him once again in the center of the changer and dusted the powder on the toddler.

It wasn't white, like he expected it to be, instead a dull, pale brown, not at all unlike the sand on the floor or unrefined flour. It was, however, impossibly fine, the grains smaller and smoother than salt. He doused all of the rash area with it, and then put the jar of powder in the sink, going back to holding the baby's hands.

'There we go~' he said, smiling lightly at how the drying water made Gaara's hair stick in place and curl slightly in others. 'How long do we wait?'

'Your sealing method has orthographic mistakes and that's always a weaker link in the chain.' muttered the redhead, his scowl deepening at Gaara's momental squeal of emotions as Minato gave him a kiss. The way that man treated that kid was outrageous, it was like if he was three years old trying to cuddle up to a tranquilized tiger. Waking up at that. He looked down at the bathtub and straightened up. There was no need to scrubbing through, even if he had little to no use of this thing. 'We wait until he stops screaming murder. Get ready for checking how high he can sing and don't forget to watch your back.'

With that, he opened the window, letting some of the humid air escape, along with the sand he simply threw down to the street. Gaara looked up at him, holding for Minato's fingers on his dear life and playing with them a bit, still looking up to be picked up. After a few seconds however, he stopped moving and looked at him, a bit indecisive and confused, until his face scrunched up in grotesque expression of pain and surprise, and he let out a wail – normal one, at first, but gaining on strength. Sand stomped on the floor again. Twice this time.

'Not too bad considering I don't know how the hell you are supposed to write in scribbly dotty and I had to make things up in half a day, huh?' the blonde said in what could almost be considered flirtatious way if it hadn't been because he wasn't making eye contact. Minato didn't really need anyone to tell him when he had done something right, but he still liked to hear it. Sealing was the one thing he had been competitive and borderline vain about in his life, and he didn't really think he had a reason to change, considering the effort he put on it. His brief moment of self fawning was interrupted by a piercing wail, and he nearly groaned at the how repetitive this had become in his life as of late.

'Didn't you have anything that would heal him without making him go off like this?' he asked, trying to shush the baby with some light stroking.

'No, definitely not bad. Half of nation not bad.' answered the redhead as he closed the window with a characteristic creek that seemed to assist all windows built in sand walls. 'And no, it's desert, and in here medicine always tastes bitter. If you wanted him to be happy about being healed, you'd soon enjoy maggots trying to crawl up there too. And there's no thing that hurts as badly as disinfection on rash.'

Gaara on the other hand, didn't seem to be liking or disliking any of those ideas; he had only took even more air in his lungs and cried, making the sand actually rise above the floor – only an inch, but still. He didn't seem to want to be quiet anytime soon, even if he went through a wailing quest for more than an hour now.

Despite the wailing, Minato stopped to blink at the redhead. Either his mind was playing tricks on him, or the Kazekage had sort of kind of just admitted Minato's semi-suicidal attempt to seal Shukaku in place had actually been a good thing. The fact it contradicted previous claims that the disaster was his fault made it even more shocking, but Minato wasn't petty enough to call him on that.

In fact, Minato was smart enough to know this was a good moment for him to shut up and pretend the older man hadn't said anything important, which wasn't too hard to accomplish, all things considered. It wasn't like if he had a baby equivalent to a shaken-not-stirred jar of nitroglycerine at hands, right?

'Poor baby.' he said again, gathering the redhead in one arm and lightly stroking his head, he knew it wouldn't make any difference, but at least he was doing something. And speaking of doing something- 'Why don't you try the fixed seal?'

In ideal circumstances, they should try it on the baby when the monster was at normal level, but if Gaara was this upset now, better play it safe. It was time the Kazekage tried to use them himself, in case it was needed.

'It needs steady infuse for about three seconds. It's a lot less than the one you showed me, about as much as for walking on water, but you don't have to waved the amount for the time it activates.'

The redhead looked at the blonde for a second, then sighed and laid the tub down on the floor. Did the man really need him to demonstrate he could execute such things right now when Gaara decided to tear his own throat out? But, as there was no questioning it, he simply took the newest seal and stuck it to Gaara's forehead, ignoring his choked surprise as the world vanished from his view. The sand had only stilled and got back to previous mad sizzling. There was almost no difference in anything beside the fact that the freezing took maybe a second longer and a single second quicker – which could mean a life saved or no progress at all, depending how one could look at it. Daichi didn't want to really look at it from any side. He lost his beliefs about taming monsters quite some time ago.

'Have fun with your ears.' he muttered as he grabbed the tub under his arm and walked away.

'Hey, and how do I know the powder is done?' the blonde asked as he lightly removed the seal from the baby's forehead and inspected the new now dull red additions- well, as it turned out, he hadn't missed connectants, just a couple dots here and there. He assumed it would involve Gaara stopping with the wailing, but after that what? 'Do I brush it off when it's done, do I leave it, do I change his diapers like normal…?'

'I said it's the least invasive, so just survive.' answered the voice, muffled by walls. 'Unless you want to check if you're really lucky, that is.'

And with that, steps emerged deeper down, stomping away. The baby looked for a moment at the door, then closed its eyes and let out another anguishing wail, that made an actual crack on the wall. Something moved and shone in it, but from the further direction it wasn't visible what it was. Gaara seemed to be uninterested by it.

'…that doesn't really explain anything!' And now he was alone, no Kazekage or ANBU or even unreasonably pretty maid-slash-nanny's to so much as hint as to what he was dealing with.

'Yeah, because they were so helpful…' The blonde thought, eyes catching the silver gleam with interest generally reserved for crows and magpies, but it wasn't like if he'd stick a hand into a narrow crack just because something shiny was in it. No matter how much he liked shiny things.

'Poor Little Red.' he said instead, though his eyes remained on the crack, even as he grabbed one of the extra towels from Gaara's pack and folded it on his lap, pulling the baby on it so he could have him closer. 'Why does everything have to be difficult in this stupid country?'

Gaara obviously, didn't know the answer to that – and even if he could think about it, he would probably come to one conclusion – because it was here and not anywhere else. Culture just sunk on some people and they wore it like clothes. But it was far beyond his comprehension now. At this moment, Gaara only wanted for the pain in his lower regions to stop. He didn't recognize it as a healing pain nor he noticed that the area where it hurt slowly got smaller – the existing disturbance was too occupying. So he cried, and with every deeper cry, the dust fell from the ceiling and covered them both. Also, the crack got a bit deeper and a bit wider, the being in it becoming more glistening, even more mobile and even more hostile. They were wall in wall with another dimension, but they had no right to know that and be afraid of it – Shukaku knew that, but that didn't make his anger any more lulled. The cry of a kid rode him like a mad bull and he was ready to even go inside out for the pain and danger of damaging the body to stop, even if he knew better. His old as time, primalistic animalistic instincts took over him and rose for the kill at anything that could impose danger. In such case, Minato.

The blonde in question had been staring at the strange crack with slight weariness, but nothing especially concerning. He could feel the intent to harm coming from the sand on the floor, but whatever was inside the wall was as dull and lifeless as some piece of furniture. At least while it remained in there it felt that way. He thought it was just a cluster of minerals or something that came dislodged thanks to the Raccoon maddened attempts to oppose the seals Gaara had been covered with, and such crystal -like formations growing in the rock weren't rare at all in here.

What did get the blonde to move was the fact the ceiling started showering them with loose sand and given how difficult cleaning Gaara had been, he didn't think trying to stay was a good idea. With the monster's current level of coordination, just with keeping himself busy by moving from one room to another should be enough to keep imminent damage to his person away. In one fluid movement he was off the tub's edge and grabbing the medium-sized bag with baby necessities the Kazekage had left behind, Gaara somewhat awkwardly cradled for the moment it took him to get the bag in the right position before straightening.

Gaara didn't find that pleasing, displeasing or absorbing at all as he just kept crying for all its might. The crack, however, made a crunching noise as it had deepened a little more, the clusters of sand covering the glassy tiles of the floor. It was not letting him go away unsupervised. The sound did catch Minato's attention, this time being loud enough for him to stop and turn around. For a moment he stayed still, one hand adjusting Gaara across his forearm while the other kept him in place, blue eyes going from the dust on the floor to the crack in the wall. The gleaming silvery sparkles were mostly gone, and the thin fissure looked as average as any crack in the wall would. There was nothing special about it, no killing intent, no black, yellow eyes with diamonds slits and shards for teeth popping on every surface, and the sand on the floor - the sand was utterly still.

Gaara kept crying in his hold, and for some reason the sight of the crack made him pull him higher and closer. By all means it should be agitated on Gaara's condition, why didn't he feel it? A demon wouldn't know how to conceal their alien chakra, not this close up.

'Kazekage-sama…?' there was no answer, and when he risked a look back, sure enough, there were no ANBU, no femmy nanny's and of course, no short, sullen redheads.

'…What are you doing?' So far the creature had given all signs of being quite the (if poor and mostly horrifying) conversionalist, hadn't Wren said so? 'Let's talk.'

Shukaku on the other side had smiled, quite lazily. He could talk, why not. But he was not going to be a talkative chirpish bird. He had other important things to take care of. Like this crying kid. He had to keep an eye on him. The lack of answer disturbed Minato even more than the human-faced wallpaper show the Ichibi had put for him so recently. Had the half dozen seals they had put on Garaa weakened it enough for it not to be able to do anything, even communicate? It wasn't supposed to work like that. Maybe it was something the Kazekage had done with the modified seal?

Even if it were, there was no way something as simple, as small as this seal could render the monster down like this. It was supposed to just confuse the connection between Gaara and it so it would be unable to spread it's chakra to other things he could mobilize- nothing like this. What the hell, was the thing playing possum? Should he order the creature to speak with a seal? Should he get closer and comment on what big teeth did granny have?

'We are trying to heal him.' he said, running a soothing hand over Gaara's back. He didn't really think that the fact they were trying to help it's host would matter to the monster much either way, all he hoped was to keep it entertained for long enough they could get the baby back to an agreeable situation without someone (him) losing important anatomical pieces. Why couldn't this weird powder work faster?

'Surely you can tell? I'm trying to take care of this baby, I know it's the probably the first time you see someone here doing it, but I am.'

Shukaku didn't answer to this also, there was nothing to talk about. His smarter side of brain clearly pointed out to him that the blonde toddler holding his human host toddler was right and that at least there was some logic in this hurt-to-heal talk, but his bigger and much stronger side of brain, that represented his instincts, simply ignored everything and trashed wildly at all feelings. Hurts, so get away. Hurts, so get away. Hurts so get the freaking host away from it or something bad will happen, because pain is the first step to horrible things. Like death of the host. Not really something he wanted. He blinked, his gaze not for once leaving the pair from his sight, even if they were cleared by shadows and hidden in the light – and he made one more effort to trying to gaze through the crack at them. Baby's cry stung him like needles.

The wall shivered and moved a bit like in the old puzzle game, and then one big shiny eye finally glared outside right at Minato and at Gaara. The redhead looked back at it and simply covered his face with arms, continuing to cry. Minato could feel his eyes prickling even though they were nowhere near watering, small hairs standing on his nap and his arms.

It looked- different, somehow. Not at all like the multitude of eyes that had sprouted all over the village so recently. The forms were the same and if he had been asked to draw them he supposed the general shapes would have been the exact same thing; diamond shaped pupils, perfect dots, the black and the gold - and yet it looked completely unlike it. It made him think the way the world had seen once he'd been badly poisoned and he'd been practically delirious.

The world had been essentially the same, but everything had looked so much more threatening, so much sharper. The colors sticking out like sores, like things half stapled together in a hurry to hide something just underneath, alien and nightmarish. The eye he saw staring at him from the wall made the face that had almost caved a ceiling on top of him look like a child friendly cartoon, and even as he watched thin, vein-like threads of purple spread from the edges of the crack as if just it's touch were singing it.

Minato wanted to turn away from the unnerving image of that staring eye, but found himself unable to, just managing to blink tiredly once or twice. Unbeknown to him, each time he reopened his eyes, his pupils shrank to pinpoints for a moment before slowly dilating until the blue irises seemed to be gone. In answer, the pupil moved, lazily, looking at both of them, then at their feet and then heads. Then the eye had closed as Shukaku decided to blink (not that he needed, but he liked imitating such small things from time to time). And because such closeness was quite draining, the demon backed away a bit, letting the shadows cover him again, leaving the glinting to do the rest. Gaara hiccupped and simply moved toward Minato, hiding his head in the folds of his clothes, his cry somewhat softening, but not stopping.

Minato didn't notice, remaining unmoving and still until the eye was hidden from view again. For a moment his body swayed gently for a moment, as if he were trying to rock and had forgotten how it was done, before finally moving backwards as in slow motion. He woke up with a gasp when the bare skin of his shoulder and arm met with the comparatively cold wall, previously lax muscles strengthening back to a normal use, quickly taking Gaara back up because for some reason he was now barely holding him and the baby almost fell.

'There, there…'

What the hell. There was an odd buzz in his head, growing quieter and dimmer by the moment, like a retreating swarm of wasps, and he shook his head to try and clear them. He looked up at the crack on the wall, looked at the strange, small net of purple burn-like marks, and wondered where the hell they had come from.

'A little better, baby?' he asked, picking Gaara under his arms and pulling him close so he could nuzzle him a bit. With his sight blocked, the sound nearly went away completely. He did sound a bit less hysterical about his pain. 'Hang on a bit more and you'll feel better, okay?'

The redhead didn't really react, only curling into the hold more. The answer had shown itself in different way though; three ANBU, Wren and two unknown masks – one of them resembled rabbit that was supposed to be kangaroo at first and the other surely couldn't be anything else but of spider species. All of them gathered around the crack and looked into it, backed away with three steps and looked at each other, not uttering a single word. Wren scribbled something on one of his hands, his notepad unseen anywhere, the rabbit figure scratched behind an ear. Then three of them linked hands and went inside, one of them still holding the brim of the wall, black fingers of mittens clearly cutting out from pinkish burn on the tiles. Wren coughed and started jabbing the pencil into one of his arms, writing equations that made no sense, but well indeed correct. A moment later the spider anbu went out of the hole, his partner nowhere to be seen. Wren looked at the blank mask, then inside the hole, then at Minato and vanished. The only person left finally let out something akin to a sigh, only much more similar to a gurgling underwater and red liquid started flowing from under the place where mask ended on the chin. The other was still nowhere to be spotted. The ANBU made a few indecisive steps and fell face forward toward the wall and stayed like that, immobile and grotesquely hollow, if anything, resembling a doll more than a soldier.

Minato told them not to. At least he was reasonably convinced he did, but the truth was that after it he couldn't really remember if he actually said anything out loud or he just thought he did. The past five minutes or so were a bit difficult to recall, all he knew was that he was talking to Gaara. Something about trolls and squires. Then… something (gold?) flashed and the buzzing was back in his head, loud and annoying, so he thought - maybe if he went into the hole he could tell whoever was inside to shut the hell up because it was really irritating. He tried to do exactly this, but fortunately tripped on something on the way, warm and heavy, and then Gaara let out a piercing wail at the sudden change of gravity, the sand only sluggishly catching he both of them. It didn't seem to have enough strength to even stick to him, and Minato irritably pushed it away, where it proceeded to curl offendedly. Minato looked at the body of the ANBU on the floor. He could have sworn there had been someone else. But when?

'Y…Yashamaru?'

Blood. Spider ANBU man needed a doctor. Yashamaru was the only one he knew by name, so he called him. Disturbed, he stood up and looked around for something, sat back down and put Gaara on his lap, fingers scratching over the smooth mask because he couldn't seem to figure out where the borders were. He finally removed it, revealing strangely feminine features distorted by dark brown paint and blood flowing sluggishly from mouth, nose and even thin streaks from the eyes. They looked like tears.

'Yashamaru! Kazekage-sama!'

Was he/she breathing? He put a hand on the chest, feeling the faint, quick thumps against it. The ears weren't bleeding, but even if that was a general good sign regarding trauma, Minato didn't know enough. Gaara wailed at being left down, but Minato was busy trying to push at the man/woman's chest to put his/her heart back into the proper rhythm to pay too much attention.

'Someone get a mednin!'

He couldn't hear himself over the buzzing. With an almost animalistic growl he picked Gaara and dragged the ANBU by the back of his/her shirt out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him with a bang. Then the migraine started, bright and painful like a shard of ice at the base of his skull. Clutching his head, Minato leaned on the wall in front of him, nails scribbling over the surface blindly until they drew blood.


	12. 12 chapter

The crack inside the bathroom could be heard as the walls shook and started shedding paint and stone. A moment later the walls on the both sides of him started cracking and opening, forming the similar opening to the one in the bathroom, with the same presence oozing from it, still observing, still following. Something close to laughter could be heard from it, but it was muffled like if it was coming from six feet underground and as if the laughing one had mouth full of cotton. The same was with following scream and following talk, too hidden to be understood. Gaara opened his eyes wide, observing the cracks, then hid his face away, not looking at either side of it. The ANBU hiding behind the mask of spider didn't even try to react in any visible way. A second later two personas showed up, one of them being unknown ANBU in a mask that didn't resemble any animal and Kazekage himself, who caught both of them into standing position. He looked to the side, then at the soldier laying on the floor.

'Heal him.' he muttered 'She is as good as dead.'

The person behind the mask nodded and kicked the still breathing body away, applying the green chakra to Minato's neck, from where it started spreading. The woman on the floor gurgled something, but nobody paid attention to her.

'What is this?...' asked Daichi, looking at the holes on each side of the walls, not even trying to get close to any of them '…are you trying to destroy my house now?...'

In an answer, an eye opened in one of the holes and looked directly at him. Daichi, despite standing still, looked like if he was about to collapse. Then he looked away.

'I don't understand anything, but that's nothing new.' he said most likely to himself 'Let go of the brat, Namikaze.'

The hand that had been clutching at the wall moved the man's chest, clutching at his shirt and smearing blood, almost unnoticeable on the dark material. He didn't release Gaara, actually cradling him close to his chest and forcefully pulled at the Kazekage closer, hiding his face against his shoulder and keeping Gaara between them.

'Don't look at it.' he said, his voice cold and coherent despite how shaken his sounded. The pain was awful, worse than anything he had felt so far, but it did shake him out of the drugged haze his mind had descended into. 'It's a flytrap.'

'The only thing that's trapping me in this room now is you.' said Daichi looking down at the body that pulled at him so suddenly, but not unexpectedly at all. He lived through too much and too long to not recognize such movement from the movement going for a kill. There was a very thin line though. He smiled lightly, not letting the notice of the fact that Gaara slowly quieted down slide. He rose his hands and pulled Minato against himself, feeling the structure of his body and the smell of his sweat, his fear and his blood. The medic healed him even though he had it harder to reach to the vital point.

'I'm taking you to bed now and if you want to take these things with you it's only your choice.'

It would be hard to determine if it was the healing chakra or the hold, but the fact was that the blonde relaxed against the shorter body almost immediately, not clutching at it as much as leaning.

'It'll follow.'

It had followed them out of the bathroom. He wondered if there had ever been a crack there to begin with, considering how underpowered the real sand was, but all of that seemed too complicated right now. Daichi looked at it, indecisive. It will follow?... Why would it follow? But then – why wouldn't it. The answer was pretty obvious, and it was so wrapped up in its own current misfortune it didn't even try to push him away, even if he was all around him. Gaara was a magnet for all bizarre things that happened to him so far. He sighed, trying to wonder what to do. He couldn't exactly leave them here, but making Shukaku follow them was not wise also.

'Let's go back to the bathroom then.' he said and pushed Minato slightly. He didn't know what chances were that it would stop or… anything, he didn't even know what this new thing could do, but he really didn't like how catatonic the body on the ground looked. He thought of treating it again, but the only specialist medic he had in the house had both hands broken and the man with him was just learning and if he wasted energy of his on something like that… Suna still had too many victims of current happenings. He wondered if it was possible to rewind his own birth and choose more wealthy country to be born in.

When he answered negatively for that, he simply took both bodies in front of him in his hands and pushed them into the bathroom again. The presence in the walls, indeed, followed. The day was indeed getting funnier by every passing minute.

'Don't look at it!' the blonde stressed again, allowing the redhead to pull him back into the bathroom even if it was one of the last things he wanted after what he had seen inside of it. If the creature would just follow, there wasn't much point to trying to escape, though. And it wasn't like if the monster meant them harm, other than trying to lure them into it- so far it seemed content with whispering creepily in what Minato suspected was the spoken version of the seals he'd recently been working with.

'Didn't someone else go in…?' he asked after a moment, pulling away from the Kazekage's broad chest to inspect damage on the sniffling baby on his arms. 'I think someone- what are you doing?'

Minato swatted at the ANBU on his back, just fully registering his presence now.

'Go check on spider, I'm not hurt.'

Despite his words, when he finally looked up enough for the blonde bangs to part, there was a small, bright splotch of red on his left eye. The medic immediately removed both of his hands from Minato, looking positively confused, but made no step forward the body laying behind the floor. Daichi gritted his teeth lightly and caught the blonde's chin. The dot in the eye surely looked like 'something' after such a period of healing chakra induced to all inner organs.

'He is hurt, heal him.' he muttered and looked down at Gaara. The redhead had seemed to slowly calm down, but much quicker than before. It seemed that the ointment worked miracles, but that didn't stop from the hole from existing. He wondered if it was even a process he could rewind. He blinked and looked down in the blue eyes, moving Minato's face to the side. He had very nice skin for someone living on the desert, almost no signs of dry net or greasy pores.

(a nice buy)

The corners of his lips twitched a bit.

'You're top priority here, so don't try to act like a hero. It will only slow everything down.' he said 'Black widow is already dead, and if she isn't, then maybe she can keep up with that pace until someone has free hands for her. Soldiers have to be strong or die strong.'

Minato pulled away from the redhead, not liking this whole being examined like a gift horse, even though that was what he essentially became for this mane. He swatted at the kid –ANBU without a defined mask meant they were trainees, regardless of the village - and gestured at the door, adjusting the baby in his arms as he did so.

'Priority is not to lose soldiers unnecessarily. She was alive-' as she indeed had been identified by the redhead as a female. '…a moment ago. Heal her if you can.'

'In my case priority Is to not lose the most important things, I'm not comfortable with wider range.' said the redhead, but he waved his hand at the undefined mask to move out of the room. 'But if you won't settle down until I say so, then all right. But only this once.'

'How generous.' the blonde said ironically, lips lifting into a small smile, How nice to know he was so appreciated in this little spot of sand in this sea of sand and heat, now it only it were for himself and not the money he represented…? 'If you are so concerned you can heal me yourself, aren't you a qualified mednin?' he didn't wait for an answer, given he didn't feel he needed actual healing of any kind. Instead he focused his attention in trying to get Gaara unglued from his chest and coax him to look up.

'Gaara?' he stroked the by now dry fuzzy head, feeling a tiny ear shell gently. 'Come on Little Red, you are going to pass out if you press so hard.'

'I can heal your eye, but it will also get permanently blind. My methods of healing are methods that go well on a war, not under delicate emergency.' muttered the redhead and simply let go of the both of them, moving to the side. The smaller one of them let out something that could be identified as shout of protest, muffled by a material of Minato's shirt, but it was nowhere as loud as at the beginnings of it. Then, a smurfy sound of a nose being cleared from the snot and only then a scrunched, red face of the redhead showed up, finally silencing down – but only in voice. It was more than obvious it was only a pause, not a stop.

'Heal my eye? My eye is fine.' Minato could see just fine through both of them, and as the older man let them go (had he been grabbing at both of them all this time?) he stood up, gingerly making sure to keep his back to the cracked wall, and looked at himself in the mirror. 'Ah…'

What the hell. Had he hit himself with anything?

'Someone went into it.' he said again, pulling back a little to look down at the baby. 'I'm sure of it- hi baby.' he brushed a hand under a dark-smudged eye, ignoring whatever mess might have been left on his shirt. Naruto also thought whatever he was wearing was there for him to wipe his various fluids on it. He'd soon learnt the less he thought about it the better.

'There you go,' he cooed, moving his hand to the other eye to brush away the fat tears. 'Feeling any better?'

Gaara, of course, didn't respond. The only answer he gave was a blink of an eye, followed soon with a moan, that changed the intensity in another cry. It sounded even more tired now and only a bit stubborn, like if the redhead actually wanted to prove something with it.

'If something went into it, then it had to be Uchiha genes, I've never seen a healthy eye to look like that.' said Daichi as he laid one hand on the burns on the wall. They seemed to be a through made stamps in the paint and concrete sand. 'And I know nothing of anyone missing yet, so I'm not checking for anything to not check if the demon can walk out of there if I show him how.'

'I meant it- can you stop touching that?' he didn't know why he bothered, but the fact was that he did walk closer even if everything told him it wasn't a good idea. He hesitated for a moment as if he wasn't very sure what to do, then reached for the older redhead's wrist, pulling at him away. It made him feel slightly ridiculous, but the truth was the Kazekage looked like the kind of guy who would take anything more forceful as a challenge and dig his heels just to make a point.

'I'm sure that thing ate one of your ANBU and hasn't spat it out yet. And it almost killed Spider, and did this to me from just staring at it too long. I'd rather not be blamed if it eats your hand.'

Daichi stumbled back a few steps and looked down at his wrist. He didn't really expect to be grabbed at, not here, not now. It was quite a daring movement considering most of his ANBUs would try to touch him only at grave danger. He didn't see it here by far.

'But you seem to be very concerned about my hand.' he said, his voice genuine and velvety soft 'Should I take this as an invitation?'

The little redhead on the other hand didn't really oppose to anything. He had hiccupped and stopped with cry one more time only to continue three seconds later. Something shifted in the hole, but from this position it was hard to see what it was.

'Yes, take it as you will.' Minato said with an easy smile, the slick meaning being either completely missed or completely ignored - it was hard to tell with the younger man. 'I'd take is as an invitation to stop sticking parts of your body you might need in the future into place you aren't sure might be too likely to give them back.'

Satisfied with the level of attention, Minato finally released the wrist and took several steps away, getting practically as far away from the hole as the limited dimensions of the room allowed. Once satisfied with the distance, he picked Gaara up at a higher level, frowning at him lightly before pressing his forehead against him, giving him a soft nuzzle.

'Gaara, baby, far it be from me to make unfair accusations, but I'm starting to suspect you are doing this only for attention now.'

In an answer Gaara let out something that could be considered a very annoyed gurgle without really stopping his crying so it sounded like 'uannurgannngle!' and arched his spine up as much as he could, so his middle was far much higher in the air than his body and legs. Then he simply laid back and got back to crying that subdued into an irritated kind of sobbing.

Daichi was once again near the hole, trying to prod pink burns, even if Minato stated something else less than twenty seconds ago. The sand fell out of it, making the whole thing shift in a closing manner.

'It seems to be stopping.' he muttered.

'Fantastic, would you stop poking it before it decides to come back?' the blonde might have sounded less corrosive if he hadn't been trying to stop Gaara to do a backwards summersault from his arms, which amounted to him trying to wrap an arm around a baby that suddenly seemed to be made from live rubber. 'Finally.'

He adjusted the baby again so he was resting against his shoulder and started bouncing him lightly, trying to get him to stop. While he did so he took a distrustful glance towards the healing crack in the wall, shivered, then peeked out of the bathroom to see if the trainee had managed to save the androgynous ANBU or not. The trainee indeed tried to do something with the body, lank face and movements of it indicated he knew what he was doing. The body, however, looked just as immobile and dead like before. White mask looked back at Minato without the slightest sound.

'She has flowers in her veins.' he said with a slight surprise in his voice and looked back at the body. In answer, one eye of the girl slowly turned to the side and hid into the skull. Gaara looked back at that and finally, his voice died at the show. Slowly, he put finger in his mouth and started sucking. Hard.

'I don't think it's coming back. Where are you going?' could be heard from the inside, followed by the steps. Soon enough the redhead looked through the door. 'Why are you still both here?'

'…what sort?' Minato asked without thinking, only then noticing Gaara was looking in that direction. He quickly turned halfway around so his shoulder was on the line of sight and started running fingers over the baby's back.

'Nothing, your magical crack wall makes things sprout on people's veins and organs to shrivel, still feeling like going up there to poke at it?' he said, moving away from the redhead to let him have a go at the lovely sights the hallway offered them. How long had the woman been inside that place? A minute? Less? 'Check where the rest of your ANBU are. I think you'll find yourself one short.'

In the meantime, he better take advantage of the fact Gaara had gone quiet to put a clean diaper on him and some clothing. He didn't want to spend another minute in this place if he could help it.

'I don't know the brand.' uttered the body and looked at the redhead. The eye of the girl got back to the place. This time the pupil was different color. Daichi frowned at that and flicked his finger. Both the medic and the body disappeared in the fumes of sand dust.

'If someone is missing I will know.' he said and looked at Minato and the baby 'You better look after him for it to not happen again.'

And with that, he got back to the bathroom to look at the last bits of closing hole. They were tinier than average finger now.

'It's never happened before?' the blonde looked at the older man quizzically, then at the closing crack, and went back to tying the ends of the diaper, before picking the clothes the man had left beforehand and helping the baby's little limbs through all appropriate holes. Gaara squealed at that, first with annoyance, then, as Minato accidentally tickled his foot with surprise, and in the end with something that could be close to laughter, if only Gaara knew how to laugh. But with his completely passive still face and lack of 'h' letter in words it looked more like a shout of an offender. He made no problems with slipping to new clothes though.

'I have no idea what it is.' said Daichi under his nose as he started scratching the pink sand from the wall to the clean diaper he managed to catch from the pile of clean clothes 'Weird things happen around here all the time, but this was the first.'

A moment later the diaper changed into nicely sealed square, that could be mistaken for a nicely foiled reading paper. He hid it in his shirt pocket.

'You surely are a magnet for troubles… Minato.'

The blonde smiled absently while he finished fixing the baby's clothes and took him back in arms, sighing lightly in relief. Okay, done. It just had cost a ninja missing in action and possibly another one, how could the Kazekage allow it?

'If that's what you think, you should have met my beloved.' he said absently, looking around to make sure he wasn't forgetting anything, then picking the shirt he'd discarded earlier. 'It really would have expanded your definitions.'

If this had been his problem, Minato would have told him to get a many security shots of what had happened as possible (he wanted to think there wouldn't be any records of whatever went inside the bathroom, but at least the hallway should have been easily caught by the camera on the recorder he'd seen there). He'd tell him to keep an eye on the spider ANBU, give her to some professional to check her state, figure out what the hell had the trainee meant with 'flowers' growing in her veins (he was sincerely hoping he meant the shape of broken blood vessels and not literal flowers), maybe check if there was some sort of communication with the missing ANBU and figure out who was the one who had ran off. Obviously this wasn't his problem (regardless of the fact said problem was literally attached to him), and so he didn't say anything. It wasn't life if the man would listen to him, and like hell he was going to so much a simply helping for free, because this man was sure to try and exploit any sort of kindness out of him.

And it wasn't like if he could afford him either way.

'Hungry baby? Let's see if I can finally figure out how to stop messing up your food.'

Gaara was very much keen on that, even if – as it came later – he was simply playing with him, because once he had actually got bottle in his hands he decided to check for how long Minato would actually be his loyal servant and pick it up from the floor, regarding he would drop it every few seconds. After seeing that indeed, it took him whole three tries (and third didn't work), Gaara got bored and started observing flies on the ceiling. Since then the time decided to change the pace and slow down to occasional rush ups. Gaara did his best to become a very steady boring baby and just gurgled something from time to time while clocks ticked, flies flew and more or less known people marched through rooms now and then. One of the more known ones had been Vulture who threw the piece of raw meat at Minato for no particular reason and when he saw that sand caught it and methodically started devouring it, walked away without word. The others had contained a small group of blank masks without shapes, all of them small enough to look like group of genins, princess Temari running back and forth with one of her pigtails left lose and a pair of two ANBUs – one of them looking quite muscular and quite old with grey hear and jerboa mask and the other seemed to be either sporting very long bangs or facial hair, because they grew from under every part of gecko mask. They passed him without a word, even if Gaara actually got interested with them and tried to grab their attention with hand waving at their direction. There was even a brief appearance of Yashamaru, who showed up wearing strangely feminine bed gown, as he dragged the very plain doll behind him with a trail filled with cups of herbs. The doll moved like if it was about to die, but it seemed to be the best of its abilities considering Yashamaur's hands looked like if he wanted to let people forget that hands didn't look like fingerless worms. It was even more creepy considering his band aids weren't anything but a single layer on skin. He also had passed without a word.

It was only after all that weird unsynchronized dance when the Fourth Kazekage decided to show up, in new shirt (that looked exactly the same as the old one, with the slight difference that this one was actually covered with plastic and it shone in the light) and sat down in one of the chairs with a face that would make god Mars squirm. He sat down – and kept quiet. For a long time. It took only Gaara's sudden shout toward the fact a fly tried to sit on the still sand and got trapped in it the very first moment it touched it. He looked at both of them.

'Black Widow has Sturt's Desert Pea in her veins.' he said, glaring the hole in the carpet 'A whole bunchload of flowers clogging the blood system everywhere. If it wasn't for the fact it was her ability to widen her veins, she'd be dead.'

Another morbid pause.

'I'm missing an ANBU member.'

Pause.

'Jackrabbit contacted us recently and said it's complicated.'

Pause. Daichi looked up at Minato.

'Actually, that's all he said. It's complicated.' Then his gaze fell on Gaara. 'I don't know what does that mean but I don't think he will be able to survive longer than a month without water. I'm not sure if to dismiss him yet or not.' Especially as there was no exit from where Jackrabbit supposedly was now. It was hard to tell what to do in such situation at all. He'd have to risk opening the gate once again and really, who could guarantee this would end up well at all? He didn't know. Gaara looked back and let out a bubble of saliva trail up his chin.

'…how much for taking care of the host until Armageddon breaks?'

Minato took everything with equanimity, waiting until Gaara finally decided to get bored of playing fetch with him and start praying proper attention to his food. Once sure he wouldn't have to bend over for the umpteenth time, he got back up to get the notes he had made on the speed run trial Wren and him had gone through days ago and started going over them, comparing them with the one the Kazekage had 'corrected'. The ones he had tested on the baby hadn't worked as he had wanted them to, but they had been more or less on the line of idea he had been planning. The redhead had supposedly corrected just grammatical mistakes, and all of the sudden they had a man eating crack. He didn't know anyone apart from Yashamaru, and for some reason he only seemed to get angrier at him for asking after what had happened, so Minato set to work largely undisturbed. When he saw the familiar Vulture mask, the man didn't say anything to him and the blonde, who had no idea if the ANBU had told anyone how it had been him who helped him out of the locked room and had no interest on getting him in more trouble, also pretended not to see him.

In fact; all that accounted for distraction in the following hours was Gaara, and compared with Naruto, it hardly seemed a bother. The baby was perfectly happy to be left to his own devices, provided said devices were within Minato's reach, because he wasn't anywhere inclined to go further than from his lap, and only if the blonde got tired of holding him against his chest. Every now and then he'd point at something, to which Minato would make some sort of acknowledgement and the baby would go back to staring at everything with fixed interest, apparently satisfied with the level of attention, which worked well for everyone involved. Minato had only paused to make himself some tea and dispatch a clone to check on his own child when the Kazekage came back to the table. This time it didn't seem to upset the baby, probably because of the distance kept, and the redhead seemed perfectly content with glaring at the table like if he could induce it to confession with threatening aura alone.

Given he was being pointedly ignored, Minato only picked up his notes (the new ones, because he was sure the redhead had already copied everything that could be copied from the old ones, not that they'd serve them much as heavily coded as they were), and started looking at them over the tea. It wasn't until the redhead started talking that he looked up, eyes widening a fraction over the shared news, before going down to look at the notes, then back at the redhead. The truth was he wasn't surprised the Kazekage was asking. He had a fighting chance with the monster (or at least he had a higher survival rate that half of the ANBU he had met so far) and the 'host', as his father so adoringly put it was obviously attached to him. And he didn't think the man could keep a village that lost three or four ninja weekly merely on bodyguard duty.

'…are you asking me to be a babysitter, or try and fix the seal on your son?'

'I wouldn't mind both if that's possible.' was the short answer. Strategically, Daichi covered his mouth with hands. 'Because I need both.'

Minato took a sip of his tea, wetted a finger on it and offered to the baby, leaning back on his chair.

'Body guarding a Kage's son is A rank Mission. Taking care of a jinchuuriki is an S class one. And my fares as seal master are anything but cheap, how do you expect to pay for all of that?'

The redhead looked at him, then at the floor. A single thin wrinkle showed up between his furrowed brows, something that wasn't there fairly often. Then his gaze fell on Gaara who sucked on given fingers with curiosity. He wondered for a moment… he wondered what Karura would do.

Maybe if it was Temari… or Kankuro, she'd be protective. But here…

He wasn't making this up. He was sure this was a lost case.

'I don't have enough blood in my veins to pay for everything.' he said simply and kept on looking at the floor. 'I don't want you to body guard my son, he is hardly anything but that. I want you to take care of jinchuuriki and make at least a temporary seal.'

'Temporary seal won't work more than two or three times, and that if you are lucky.' the blonde pointed out coldly, not seeming to be particularly moved by the man's words. Suna was a dying village and he had already known there was no way that the redhead could pay him. 'I don't know what sort of seal you used to put it into the baby, but it's not balanced. Until it is, everything you try at mass scale is bound to work for a limited time only.'

'I don't want you to lecture me because I was sleeping on my sealing classes but I want you to make one that would work and the one that I could afford.'

The blonde leaned on the table, one hand holding his chin up while the other kept Gaara from toppling over from his lap.

'You can't afford me.'

Cold and blunt, but the redhead certainly deserved it, and Minato had no intention (and certainly no reason) of sugarcoating it for him.

'But I am willing to work for only my fees as ninja, if you are willing to pay me as ANBU and seal master in other ways'

The redhead, who felt cold sweat for a short painstaking second, shuddered a bit, getting out from the emotional wall he had hit just by solely one sentence.

'What other ways?' he asked, quietly counting on the fact Minato would only fill the space Jackrabbit left behind and be satisfied he can visit the palace of Wind country for free. The blonde smiled. It wasn't a particularly sweet smile.

'Several things, actually.' he said, and crossed his legs, making Gaara a head or so taller, and now perfectly able to peer over the table's edge, straight into his father's line of sight. 'To start with, I need full access to all record with anything related to Shukaku, the previous jinchuuriki's of Suna, video tapes of everything worth mentioning that ever happened, and all and every document that had anything to do with all of this. That's a lot of access to classified information, and I will need permission for all of that. And I will need people helping me with it, so to start with, I will need Wren at my disposal.'

'No.' was immediate response. This request was more than overbearing, it was overstomping everything. It was like giving keys to all closed spaces in a bank to the ordinary robber. Even if Namikaze was an ex-Hokage, he'd have to assassinate him on the spot once he'd have to leave back to Konoha.

Then money would stop flowing.

'No.'

'Oh, but I just started asking,' the blonde said, sounding very much like a little kid who had just at on Santa's leg for his list of presents and hadn't even gotten into the first half of it. 'I might be good, but I'm no miracle worker, Kazekage-sama. Before getting to work, I *will* need to do research, surely you understand this.'

'You don't need research on all that.' was Daichi's answer as he locked his arms tightly over his chest 'You're the genius sealing master, the Yellow Flash who had enough time to become the legend and seal the strongest of all chakra monsters by seeing him once in his lifetime. You saw more than you need already, you don't need classified informations.'

The blonde's smile twitched. It didn't disappear, but it dimmed down to something closer to a sad grimace.

'...and it costed me my lover's life, Kazekage-sama.' he said softly, leaning back on his chair and wrapping his other arm around the baby in his lap also, one hand absently touching the baby's and rubbing. 'And all I have left is my son. I'm sorry, but I'm not willing to make a sacrifice out of myself.'

'You can sacrifice Yashamaru.'

Gaara protested loudly against getting moved from the table as he actually liked looking at what was happening there in new perspective, but he quieted down immediately at the rubbing that was made toward him. A moment later, his eyes slowly started to close.

'…you really are a despicable human being, did you know?' he asked brightly, like if he had just played the man a compliment. It was amazing, how could the man just offer him the life of a member of his family just like that.

'I'm not sacrificing Yashamaru. I'm not sacrificing anyone anymore. Not even you.' he sighed, looking down at the baby, and noticing the lack of reaction, he actually sat him up on the table, pulling the table closer so he could wrap his arms around the baby and keep his back to his chest to satisfy his need for constant closeness.

'Either way, it wouldn't work. I told you, I don't know what sealing method you used, why the hell you think I asked you for that information? I sealed the Kyuubi in the Uzumaki clan's style, your local pet doesn't respond to standard sealing. Unless I know what I'm working with, nothing I do will work.'

'A village without a leader is not a village so if you'd sacrifice me, you'd sacrifice every member of Suna to nothingness.' said the redhead, observing his third child in it's whole bodily capability. Gaara, who had sat maybe ten times in his whole life – even if he should've been walking by now –looked to be stunned by how the world looked now that he actually was looking at it from such position. He immediately looked up to see Minato and rose up his hands to try to touch his face that looked so close… and yet so far. When he only managed to brush his fingers on the chin, he turned his gaze to Daichi, who answered with sour grimace. 'And if I did give it to you, you'd have to deal with consequences of brain cells lose. And take that thing off the table.'

'That 'thing' is getting sleepy, so I think I will keep it here because if it holds his attention it won't fall asleep.' the blonde said calmly, going as far as to lean closer so it could almost be said he was leaning on the baby's shoulder, if there had been any way it could have held up his weight. 'And I already told you, I'm not sacrificing anyone.'

Gaara noticed the closure and turned his face to him, only to see Minato's cheek. After long pensive three seconds he decided that it wasn't the most interesting thing to look at, even if he liked how it radiated of warmth and Minato's minatoness. Instead, he turned back to look at the man who gave him flesh and blood and without thinking, he let his head fall to the side, so it glued perfectly well with Minato's cheek. Tiny hair on the adult's skin didn't seem to be a bother at all. Daichi closed his eyes. He saw too much of Gaara acting like a child and too much of Minato acting like if the child actually wasn't a ticking bomb. He didn't know if to feel more of a pain or of fear, so he decided on none and just turned himself to his own feet .

'I can give you access to some things.' he said slowly 'And only under supervision of ANBUs.'

'That's not good enough, and it's only the tip of the iceberg on regards of what I ask for.' the blonde said, giving the baby a little playful push of cheek, before looking up at his father. Hm, icebergs. What a nice image.

'You don't even know what are you asking for.' said Daichi just as slowly while Gaara just looked back with surprise at Minato's cheek, not understanding where this push came from. After seeing that there were no changes on Minato's face, he simply got back to previous position.

'Oh, I know.' the younger man said offhandedly. 'Classified information. Secrets of the village worth decades, not to mention family secrets… But none of that changes the fact those are the things I need to work.' And like it or not, the Kazekage had to know that.

'If I could do miracles, I'd just charge you extra, you know. Sadly, I can't.'

Daichi didn't answer. The joke didn't seem to be funny for him, especially that Minato didn't get it. He might have been asking for all that mentioned and even more, but every single one of them simply put his neck into state of divorce when it came to his head and body. If he could do miracles, he'd own money, good kids and Juubi and would concentrate on trying to regain the paradise lost he always wanted to see when it came to dry sands. But with how his hands were always occupied, he didn't have time to even think about it anymore. It seemed he was left with no choice. He had to agree, because Gaara left him no choice.

'Fine, I agree.' he said, quietly counting how many months was left until Minato would have to leave Suna. If he could delay, it were six. This ship seemed to be destined to go down. Third would be disappointed.

'What else?'

'The sealing method itself. I barely understand what I'm working with, so I need to be taught. Really taught, not letting me guess what I'm doing while you and Wren mock me for my grammar mistakes. And since Wren doesn't know enough, I expect to be taught by the best.'

And since, as the ANBU guard had told him, was only taught down ruling family… The red-haired head slowly rose from the ground, looking at Minato with eloquent disdain.

'You want me to be your tutor?'

Minato looked up from letting Gaara catch his finger and smiled sunnily.

'Are you the best?'

'I'm the only one who knows whole language of ancient Suna.' answered the man bitterly. Sure, Wren was amazing when it came to learning, but some things weren't meant to be seen by his eyes. Sadly, just as skilled other ANBU died recently. 'So yes, you could say I'm the source of clear truth.'

'Then yes, I want you to tutor me.' He'd probably end up regretting this in the future, but for the immediate time, it was nice to see the redhead squirm as badly as Minato himself had tried not to do while this man and his council discussed with Minato's the terms of their ownership. 'Also, if I'm going to be taking care of this baby, I expect I will be told how to actually manage it. Just so we can avoid things like the milk incident.' Because if he messed up because someone told him he was doing it wrong AFTER he could help it, he was killing someone.

'I don't know what do you expect but if you have questions just ask them. By now you should know how this thing works.' Said the redhead and cracked his neck. 'I'll try to be as much use as I can.'

Not that it meant much help. He himself spent with him less time than his ANBU squadron or Yashamaru – he was a leader and he had to make far away journeys, sit through paperwork, train and take care of annual events. And since he started dreading the presence of demon he left at any given occasion, unless it meant the end of the household.

'Is that all?'

'I'll ask the usual group that takes care of him; that should be Vulture, Lark and Thorny Devil, right?' that sat well enough with Minato, who generally had found he got along well with all of the ANBU trio and would much prefer dealing with them than the antagonizing redhead on daily basis. At the question he chuckled a bit, pulling Gaara back upright when he started leaning a bit too much to the side.

'Those were my conditions; I haven't told you what I want as payment yet.'

That got back the redhead's attention to him immediately. His eyes shot daggers, and very sharp ones at that.

'You must be kidding me!' he hollered, almost like if Minato had just punched all air out of his stomach. 'I thought this-'

He closed his mouth immediately calming his features.

'…tell then.'

The blonde barely squinted a little at the loud volume and covered the baby's ears, giving his father an unimpressed look and waiting to make sure he was done with the yelling before carefully removing them.

'You are asking me to risk my life on daily basis because it suits your needs, what did you expect? Would *you* charge any less?'

Daichi didn't answer, bewildered and just an inch from the storm that happened just behind his eyes. What would he do? He'd charge the man until he'd hop out from the last pants and then charge some more until there was no dignity left. But that was because he yearned money like every desperate beggar in need. He couldn't think clearly and didn't know what he would do if he actually didn't need money for itself. So he just tightened his lips. The ex-Hokage stared at him knowingly, and giving how the lack of answer was as good as a verbal one, continued.

'For one thing, since I have no idea how I'm going to be able to get this baby off of me yet without it collapsing your village, I want someone of trust taking care of my baby. And I mean actually take care of him, not the way you have been caring for this one.'

He held Gaara up for demonstration, avoiding a sticky finger that was trying to worm its way into his eye. Daichi's pupils moved fast toward Gaara, almost with animalistic speed. The baby seemed to e unaware of how close to blowing up his father were and so, he let out another impatient 'A-uh.' That seemed to be indication he was indeed, very occupied and focused on what he was trying to do, and now it was trying to touch the shiny orb of an eye. As it got away, he changed the course of his doings and out the sticky finger in one of Minato's nostrils.

'Deal.' was drawled from the man like if talking put him into sever pain. Minato immediately pulled away, at the same time lowering Gaara's hand and giving him a troubled look. He couldn't remember, but sincerely hoped he hadn't partaken in such unhygienic activities as a child.

'…Akasuna no Chiyo-sama. She was the one who sealed the bijuu in this baby, wasn't it?' he asked as he rubbed his nose lightly. There were several shinobi legends coming from Suna, such as Pakura with her deadly kekkei genkai, Sasori of the Red sand or the by now infamous Third Kazekage with his Iron Sand. There weren't, however many famous shinobi from Sand who dedicated themselves to sealing. And if the man had admitted himself not to have been in charge of the process…

'I would like to meet her.'

That made the sharp gaze turn toward Minato. For a moment they sported something akin to genuine surprise, then they closed over the extended tiredness. Oh, not her. Only not her. He avoided her for the last years of his life and she made it easy on him with not coming out from her cave, but this… this surely would make her curious enough to start jumping around the whole town (and his office) again.

'…no!' he said, but it sounded more like a stubborn yell of spoiled brat than a command of the kage. Gaara turned toward him at that sound and then stilled for a moment, looking completely taken aback by it. Then he looked at Minato and fell nose first right into softness of his cheek. As it seemed, Minato's face left Gaara with endless possibilities of fun. The tone definitely wasn't what he would have expected, nothing like irate denials that had practically come nonstop from the man's mouth so far. Before he could ask, however, Gaara decided to make a dive for his face.

'Oh, what is it with you?' he asked warmly, the tone oozing affection while he gathered the baby close and nuzzled against him. It was only after a moment of this sugary treatment completely unbecoming of a ninja supposed to be famed by his cold blood and shrewdness that he turned again towards the baby's father, the child still held close.'Why not?'

Gaara let out a noise of satisfaction and closed his eyes with a deep satisfied sigh. Being close and treated with such voice was more than soothing and he wanted to take everything from it. Slowly, his muscles let go one after another… and once again he started nodding off. Daichi, who was looking at the ceiling, didn't notice that.

'She is an old witch that knows nothing and even less.' said Daichi with a posture that still didn't dismiss the bratty side of him 'She lost her mind and sits whole day by the fishless pond of water along with her brother trying to see if it's possible to catch a fish on the desert. Meeting her is a waste of time!'

'Oh?' Minato leaned back in the chair, pulling Gaara to his lap once again while he regarded his father with interest. He had no idea what about this conversation was making the man act like this, but such juvenile reactions from such a masculine man could almost be considered cute. If they had come from any other person in this galaxy, that is. 'Might be so, but Tsunade-hime dislikes her because she is an amazing doctor and Jiraiya-sensei admires her as a seal master. I am very interested in meeting her, and if she did create this seal, it's only for the best that I do, don't you think? '

The man looked at him with the highest disturbia in his gaze and bit through his lower lip like if he wanted to bite it off. The blonde had a point here, he couldn't deny him that. He still was sure that he didn't want to dig this hole from underneath himself.

'She was.' he said finally and leaned back on his own chair also. Maybe if he showed her to him from affair he wouldn't be so persistent anymore. The fact someone tried to fish on the desert was a clear sign that someone went nuts. Minato wasn't sure what was the redhead agreeing to, and it became apparent after several moments that no further clarification would come from him.

'…is that a yes, then?'

'Yes, but you will be disappointed.' answered the man, already thinking about how to weasel out of this. Probably the first idea was the best. Not getting too close would be the best. 'Are you done with your ridiculous requests?'

'Unless you have something to add?'

'Not at all.'

The blonde nodded, taking what was left from the tea. It was lukewarm now, and he wished it might have been colder, but it was mint tea after all and he doubted 'cold' was anything he could expect with such a stifling environment.

'Agreed, then. Will you be preparing the documents or you'd rather have my familiars prepare them?'

'I'll make them myself, thank you.' said the other, not even trying to stand up from his chair. If anything he looked like if he was trying to change the table in front of him into gold with mere eye rays. 'I'd rather have control over the process of papers if I am supposed to sign them.'

Minato thought of warning the man about trying to cheat him out of either payment or what they had just discussed, but in the end just shrugged and shook the baby in his arms lightly when he noticed he was nodding off. If he did, he'd work on it when it happened, he had already gotten more than he expected out of the man, and it would be wise to leave him alone for the time being. Now he just needed to convince the redhead he was worth his money. Somehow, he had the feeling it wouldn't be too easy.

Daichi watched him retreat and only then finally stood up from his chair. His hands itched him so he couldn't and didn't really want to sit in one place. After a brief moment of watching the sunset he finally exited the room. He didn't care if Yashamaru really had his hands broken or not. He needed a punching bag and he was going to get it. Minato was free to practically forget the Kazekage existed on the following weeks. If he had had time to wonder why was it that he had maybe crossed paths with him once or twice when that the man that supposedly lived in the same house, he would probably have assumed it had to do with reparations.


	13. Chapter number thirteen

The first storm had already done enough damages as it was – a whole district had gone down, and that was ignoring the expected structural damages it had caused to the rest of the village. The second one hadn't exactly helped reassure the panicked citizens, especially preceded as it had been by the walls, ceiling and floor sprouting unexplained gawking eyes. Minato didn't envy the Kazekage whatever sort of lies he'd have to produce to explain where exactly had they come from or what the hell they were supposed to be, just as he didn't envy him what would surely be the never-ending work of clearing the destroyed buildings of the remaining corpses, the massive burial or cremation or whatever did Sunanin partake in as deathly rituals, or figuring out how to fix the gaping crater the monster had left on its wake so one could once again build on top of it.

And that without counting on the social ramifications of having one quarter of a village lose their homes and everything they owned, which usually showed in radical increase of robberies, assault, fights to death over the silliest reason and a marked increase on alcohol intake. On the other hand, he also didn't envy his own situation either. Even before the deal had been cemented, Gaara had been removed from the cellar. Attached as he was to the ex-Hokage as he was, it would be difficult for Minato to work in such reduced space and with such poor light, which didn't exactly hurt the baby's preferences any. They spent maybe a week inside the Kazekage's wife's room before it became clear that its dimensions would also be inappropriate solely due the sheer amount of books and scrolls Wren kept bringing. It seemed there wasn't a day where the masked ANBU wouldn't come drop a pile of papers, then spend several minutes bemoaning how they were irreparably messing the order of the carefully kept ancient libraries while he tried to put everything back in proper alphabetical order, only for the blonde to suddenly remember he needed something and destroy the careful order the ANBU had barely constructed.

Minato turned himself to work with a passion bordering on somewhat sickly obsession- not that anyone could have blamed him for it if they had known of the circumstances. It was easier not to think of his current situation and all the problems he still didn't know how to deal with; not to mention he couldn't exactly spend every waking moment wallowing on survivor's guilt and wondering if there was anything he could have done, anything he couldn't have, something, anything that had changed the results and had allowed Kushina to live so he wouldn't have to be here wondering if he'd ever make a decent parent or stop feeling like if the world had ended early and left him without a clear notion where to go from there. Several hours of the day were dedicated to the exercises Wren left for him, which corresponded with learning basic alphabet and numerology for the 'scribbly-dotty' language, which ironically enough was called 'Sunnah' (and spelt 'سنة'); that alone would have been time consuming, but besides that he had to look over the scrolls containing purely legends and information on regards of the bijuu and sit down to watch what literally where about a year worth of videotapes, mostly consisting in mutilation and murder that varied from 'nightmare-inducing' to 'I'm seriously considering turning vegetarian'.

Daichi came by a few times to look at the movies, his interest and expression bordering on 'utterly bored' and 'vaguely disgusted' like if he saw them all five million of times, and with how he handled it, he probably did. He wasn't very prone to explain why some things happened on them but sometimes he pointed at something that he found interesting and left. Minato was, sad to say, thankful for the company because hours of practically uninterrupted gore could get even into someone like him, who was more used to it than most. He could have asked the ANBU trio to accompany him, but in general he proffered sending them to categorize the scrolls and annotations. They had already seen their teammates (and in Lark's case, wife) butchered one time too many, he doubted they'd needed or would appreciate the Technicolor replay of it. It was difficult keeping up with the pass of time in closed quarters, and Minato soon lost any sort of willpower to try and do it- the only notion he had of days going by was memories of the sweltering heat outside (as opposed to the sweltering heat inside) when he dispelled a clone that had gone to his house to see how his son was doing. It was just easier to pretend this was just one very long, very nightmarishly never-ending day.

So he studied what he had been given, dutifully went around his research, had maybe three or four hours of uneasy sleep generally plagued with nightmares of torn bodies, sand and fire, and tried to teach Gaara how to crawl. Baby on the other hand, accompanied him very patiently and watched with him everything Minato launched on the TV without the single moment of fear or sadness. More, when Minato tried to separate him from the images he steered TV high enough for it to be visible to him, even if he had to put the screen three millimeters from his face. More, he had even reacted to some voices on the tape, obviously recognizing the owners and trying to point at the screen to show his blonde guardian that it was something that was known to him. The change of voice to screams and begging for life didn't seem to make any difference – though from time to time he actually tried to attack the TV with recognition of the moments when ninjas in the past tried to abuse him verbally. Only then when the victims started their screaming Gaara actually calmed down. Both he and Daichi ignored each other during short meetings and it seemed to be fine. What was not fine, however, was how Minato tried to accommodate him to normal life. The floor on which he lied made no difference to him, but when he had to lay on it face down for longer than few seconds it started to annoy him. So, when Minato tried to make him look up at him, Gaara simply rolled onto his back – a thing he had manually mastered – or simply rolled around the whole room. From time to time he also tried to get his head a bit higher than the ground level, but that was it. Any crawling efforts that could be done finally failed as the redhead, tired of confusion over the project, finally made the things to come to him by the brush of sand.

The only good news about this development was that the baby had finally allowed Minato to put him down every now and then, provided he was easily within sight and ready to pick him back up the moment the baby called for him. Minato had also tried to get the baby interested in having someone else to pick him up, the moment he made a suggestion to pass it to Thorny Devil (the only volunteer he'd had), Gaara had pouted, emitted a decisive negative (that sounded a little too much like his father) and clung to Minato, obviously having no interest on anyone else so much as trying to hold him. The female ANBU had gotten a rough shove of sand for the effort, but considering it hadn't even broken her skin, Minato had decided not to tempt lady luck and continue servicing the little prince to his hearts contents.

He didn't understand what he was doing wrong, Naruto was much younger than Gaara, and yet he was already crawling, as far as his clone and the thoroughly chewed state of the limited furniture could attests to. Sure, it wasn't a particularly elegant movement and it was more of him dragging his fat little tummy across the floor to get to things (ruining several shirts in the process), but he was moving and the problem usually was to keep him still. Sure, Naruto didn't have the advantage of willing sand to do the hard work for him, so in that he supposed it was excusable. That didn't mean he gave up, exactly, he made an effort to have Gaara sitting upright as much as possible, figuring that would help him strengthen back muscles he'd need for the whole crawling process, but while the baby remained agreeable and even enthusiastic of the new perspective, the moment he stopped supporting him he'd either topple in some direction or just create a makeshift chair back out of the sand.

The only thing he noticed any definite advancement was in the fact the baby understood that 'Gaara', 'Little Red' and 'baby' where all names that referred exclusively to him and would generally respond in some manner. Minato mostly talked to him - he didn't use cutesy shortenings of words, even if the tone had a tendency to turn for saccharine often enough. It was more of a one-man conversation or one man-three ANBU conversation, with the spice of every now and then having to inform the little lady of the house that no, he was not infected and no, he wasn't dying, and no, he had just sneezed, and that was no symptom of an impending pandemic. Other than that he read to him- most of the local legends were less than child friendly, but since the baby couldn't understand what he said he read them out loud for pure social benefit. It took weeks for the initial frenzy he had thrown himself in to final dwindle enough for him to remember there was life going on outside the Kazekage's house and actually ask the ANBU what was going on in the village - as in, living in it, not to mention politically.

'About that…' said Lark and shifted weirdly, the movement being the last bits of hat stepping from foot to foot would be in distinct past. 'There's someone who wants to see you.'

He didn't dwindle or deepen the topic, nor did he mention what was going outside – even if there was a few news worth mentioning, like the Kazekage committing a heresy and ordering for 'all who wanted to see better tomorrow' to stop trying to cover the hole that was left in the ground and instead move the strength to build a greenery house on the more fertile grounds. Many of Sunanins protested, being against eating the carrots that grew on their ancestor's bones, which turned into overheated battle of words between Daichi and his people (because it was hard to call it a public debate). That changed into a riot as some anonymous ninjas actually aimed weapons at the redhead and as the man decided to retreat. It quickly calmed down though, as nobody could really stand the uptight temperature to protest on the streets. Those who did, finally ended being imprisoned (which they didn't mind, because at least some of them lost their houses and in prison they were at least fed for kage's funds). But what was done was already done, the dying town seemed to actually expand with making new grounds to bury the bodies at. But this was Suna matter, nobody would want to bother the man who was in charge of jinchuuriki about such common things. Lark shifted again. He didn't know how to say it, but thankfully, the situation changed on itself.

'Can I come in finally?' asked the feminine voice from outside the door 'I'm in hurry!'

'Yes!' answered the man and bowed down into the stagnant soldier pose every ANBU made once they bowed before their superiors 'Come on in.'

A moment later the short-haired girl with big tattoos entered the room. She held in her hands a packet of dried dates.

'Good afternoon, good to see you in health.' she said, then looked at the duo on the floor. Gaara looked back at her, but his interest shifted quickly to the thing she held in her hand. The girl smiled. 'What a cute baby. Who is this?'

'This is not important. Summarize yourself and go.'

'Right!' she said, but not before she actually waved to Gaara. The redhead looked up at her and waved with the hand of sand. That wiped off the smile of the girl's face. 'I… I came here… I mean…'

Lark coughed.

'Yes?'

'I'm Maki, I'm not sure if you remember me, I took care of Naruto for the past few weeks.' she said, stammering a bit 'I come here because I'm being moved with division of nursery and mothers to the western parts of the town and to actually start practicing ninjutsu, so I come here to say that I cannot take care of him anymore. Thank you for welcoming me in!'

Minato looked at Lark, stopping from trying to teach Gaara some sort of game that involved palms and repeating the hit with the palm that gave it while occasionally giving a rough push to the sand hands that arbitrarily decided to join. When he saw the girl he stopped, immediately worried- of course he knew who she was, the nice girl who had been taking care of Naruto.

'Yes, of course.' the man nodded, adjusting Gaara. A dim part of his mind noted that the baby didn't seem to find the girl threatening, unlike his father and, to a lesser degree, his ANBU companions, but most of it was dedicated to wondering what could have happened. It couldn't be too bad, right? Sunanin might be heartless, but surely wouldn't come tell him she had accidentally cooked his son with a box of sweets as apology. 'Thank you for taking care of us, Maki-san.'

And with that, Maki bowed, giving the blonde the box of dates. Gaara immediately reached out for it, the sand immediately following it as it was higher than Gaara could get. That made the girl jump and drop the said box.

'I-I-I'm sorry! I have to go! Take care!' she stuttered as she looked with widened eyes at the sand that moved on itself and quickly walked out of the house, her step changing into run right after the door of the place closed. Or, partially closed, as Daichi was about to enter right when the girl ran away.

'She was already here?' he said with a frown. Lark kept quiet. Daichi turned around to look after her in silence. That wasn't exactly how it was supposed to go, but now there wasn't much he could do about it. Slowly, he wiped off the sweat from his forehead. The day was blazingly hot. Minato nodded, a little frustrated about her trying to leave so quickly when he would have very much liked to experiment and see if she could try to socialize with Gaara, but not really concerned. It was understandable that she would have to leave for her own studies, but he had a nicely signed contract with the Kazekage that said the man would take care o it.

'So you already know that I decided to finally change the nanny of your kid for more competent one, just as you wanted.' Daichi said and wiped his hand on the shirt.

'That's great.' Minato said absently, frowning at Gaara before plucking the box from the sand and opening it, taking out a single date and offering it to the baby for him to take it himself. He was trying to break him out of simply dragging things to himself by actually offering them to him and waiting for him to take them, giving him a good cuddle as praise when he did well. He wasn't sure training a baby like one would a dog was appropriate and he wasn't sure it worked –sometimes it did, more often it didn't- but its not like id he had that many options yet. And it wasn't like if the baby would even eat the thing, just nom on it until he tired and thoroughly drool on it.

'Thank you.'

'Yashamaru was more than happy to get back to working with babies since his hands healed. And considering he doesn't have anything to do with Gaara anymore…'

A pause. Daichi looked at the little redhead who slowly tried to reach out for a date with his own hand. 'Yeah, that's all.'

And the door had closed. Minato chuckled at this last comment - yeah, right. Yashamaru, from all people, happy to work with- with…

'You gave my baby to Yashamaru?' from the way he said it, it sounded like if the Kazekage had handed the toddler to the most sadistic captain of the torture squad. Daichi rose his eyebrows high at the shout, obviously seeming to be surprised at the outburst. The door creaked open again.

'Yes.' he stated as Gaara tentatively reached out for the given date and caught it, sweet and sticky within both hands 'Is something wrong?'

For a moment the blonde just gaped at him a thoroughly bizarre expression- something between a 'you have to be kidding me', what is wrong with you? and there is now God, but all he managed was a choked off noise more beffiting an ill animal than a human. It took some time for the man to actually manage to emit a plausible answer, but indeed, he did.

'…you gave my baby to Yashamaru!'

'Yes, I did and I don't understand your behavior.' said Daichi stoically. Actually, he did, but no way in hell he was going to admit to it. The revenge was sweet when it happened. That wasn't very mature, but he savored it anyway. 'Yashamaru is one of the best mednins and the only alive person who had experienced how to take care of jinchuuriki. This makes him by far the best candidate to take care of any baby, be it from a kage or not.'

He could also point out that he took care of two toddlers before, but that was more than obvious to him. For some reason the redhead pointing that out made Minato pale more or less to the point he could almost be said to match Gaara's natural skin color.

'Yashamaru detests me!' he was not exaggerating here, Minato had no idea why was it so - like most people he had a marked tendency to forget he had indeed been rather rude to the man upon further introduction, and the fact that most of his irritation came from the way he treated the so called monster responsible for his sister's death seemed to be lost on the ex Hokage- but the point was that extended sharing of close quarters , limited as encounters were, hadn't done much for their blossoming relationship. 'He's going to cook my son - he'll make a pie out of him!'

Okay, that might have been an exaggeration, but not by much.

'He'll do horrible, horrible things to him in revenge- and he can hide them because he's a medinin, and no one will ever now Naru is in pain- couldn't you find someone who hated me more? Were all Iwanins too busy to take the job?'

'You're talking nonsense. Yashamaru is a skilled and loyal ninja and has no interest in hurting some unknown baby. It's his mission so he will do it well.' And that one was quite true; Yashamaru, as much as hypocritical he was, usually didn't leave his mission undone, even if he then spat with passive-aggressive comments all the time at him. 'If he will do something out of range then I'll consider removing him. Until then, removing him from his duty would be pointless.'

Because he didn't really want to bother with searching for someone else who could be just as good – he had too many things to do already. He did however feel, that Yashamaru was able to torture the child that way. For a moment he hesitated, but in the end, his annoyance won. If the kid would have to bear with the physical pain from such age then all the better for him, ninja training and all that.

'Iwanins are not exactly people I hire.'

In another moment, Minato might have hit where it hurt and reminded the redhead he wouldn't have been able to afford them either way, but unfortunately he was very busy having an internal panic attack. His fears might have been greatly exaggerated and deep, deep down Minato wanted to think Yashamaru wouldn't be petty enough to make his son suffer just out of passing dislike for him. He didn't expect him to *like* taking care of Naruto, but he also wasn't exactly thinking he'd abuse such a small baby. He had taken notice of the way he took care of Temari and Kankuro before, hadn't he?

Unfortunately, Minato had very good reason to be terrified of the Kazekage's in-law anywhere near his son. Because Yashamaru, pretty, hypocritical and disturbingly femmy Yashamaru was a mednin. A damn good one if he had managed to heal his own broken hands in a manner of days. And Naruto was a very, very special little baby.

Minato would be the first to admit that he didn't know much about babies (the closest interaction with most being watching mothers with their kids walking around, maybe saying hi- oh, and when Kakashi had been two and asked him if he'd marry him when he grew up) but he was positive babies didn't get teeth until they were older than Naruto, and for sure they didn't start with goddamned fangs. He wasn't sure they weren't permanent, either. He hoped they'd be milk teeth, but from the way his son gnawed on everything he was starting to grow genuinely worried about what he would tell him when he got older. He'd always heard about parents commenting on how their children grew in the blink of an eye, but at six months Naruto was bigger than he had expected, especially when he remembered what a minuscule thing he'd been at birth. And a lot stronger than he would have expected.

And to Minato's immense terror and paranoia, he had virtually no way of knowing if this was something more or less common or a sure sign someone would very soon start asking questions he didn't want so much as thought. Daichi on the other hand kept on looking at Minato without much of a thought or regret. He was leading life of a busy man, so if one thing got down without much rebellion, it was also fine for him.

'If that's all, then we will see each other at dinner.'

And he walked away. Gaara looked at the door and sniffed the air lightly as he kept on sucking on the dry date. So far, he managed to get drool all over it.

'I swear to whatever unmerciful deity rules over the Sun in this apocalyptic planet…' he said pointing at the recently Kazekage vacated spot 'if something happens to my son I'm throwing this baby to his face.'

And since the ANBU would be the ones to have to go between him and that happening, this was a not too subtle threat that they also better make sure nothing happened to a certain someone's blonde little baby.

'You just said not long ago that you wouldn't throw this baby no matter what.'

'I'll throw him carefully.' the blonde replied with a little tight smile. 'Very, very gently.'

For sure it wouldn't be the little redhead who would end up damaged from such an experience. Vulture said nothing. A moment later he couldn't be seen near on sight. Just right then Gaara let out a strange yowl that could be compared only to a sound made by cat in heat. He also froze in his hold for whole three seconds. A moment later he looked at Minato with frown and uttered something that couldn't be mistaken by anything else.

'Nnnngrrrhhh!'

It was definitely a show of anger.

'Oh, what?' the blonde said, with an exasperated sigh, using one corner of the baby's bib to clean some of the excess of saliva that trailed down his chin. 'You know I wouldn't.'

The sad truth was that regardless of the fact he knew what the bijuu inside this baby could do, to him Gaara was essentially a baby. And given the fact he looked smaller and frailer than most he'd seen, the idea he might break if not handled with care was painfully ingrained in some small corner of the blonde's psyche. The fact he could make such an adorable mini Kushina didn't help matters. Gaara huffed and let out another angry yell, this time sounding more like an animalistic growl. The sand on the floor swirled and rose up, flying to Gaara like metal filings to magnet, but then the redhead blinked and they all fell down. After a long moment in which mightily frowning baby seemed to consider whether to get more angry or not, the baby's expression had cleared.

'Awoh.' he communicated very seriously and clapped the surface of Minato's hand with the same gesture he did just before Maki interrupted their play. Minato rose his hand and patted it back in a 'high-five' fashion.

'Awoh right back at you, redhead.' he said with mock seriousness, giving the baby a little push with his forehead, before resuming his seat. He wiped his hand on the floor, then caught Gaara's and cleaned it from the drool and sticky sweetness with the bib, making a small movement to let the ANBU know the crisis was, at least for the moment averted. He wasn't sure how perceptive normal babies usually were, but Gaara was exceptionally so. He didn't think he understood what he had said yet, but generally when he showed irritation, Gaara only got fussier, just like he tended to calm down quicker if he treated him as if nothing out of the ordinary were happening.

Sadly, even if this was working for the most of the time, this time it was different. Sure, Gaara didn't pick up on his sudden outburst right after, but the joy didn't last long. Three hours later, when the blonde finally decided to wrap up their plays and to look how life was in other parts of the house, Gaara once again froze in his hold and frowned. The angry yell that was uttered later was the first thing that greeted Yashamaru when he entered the room.

'My, aren't we cheery today.' he said like if it was nothing and just walked past them, including big circle that he made to actually get as far away from them as possible 'You have golden hands when it comes to kids, Hokage-chan.'

At those words, Gaara let out a rumble no man would be ashamed of and suddenly broke into nervous silence, looking like if he was sitting on the anthill.

'Hello, Yashamaru.' the blonde replied calmly, looking at the figure on the scroll for a moment, before carefully inking brush and trying to reproduce the figure in it with as few strokes of brush as possible. Did he mention in Sunnah you wrote from right to left? Because you did. With your dominant hand. Wren was left-handed and he wrote with his left, which made lessons doodles a lot of fun. 'There are dry dates in the pantry if you want some.'

It seemed Gamakijou-san hadn't needed to summon bigger cousins to devour Yashamaru in revenge for harm come to Naruto. He was almost, almost sorry about that. But not as sorry as he was for his growing nervousness, did this mean the Kazekage decided to grow his heart three times size and put someone decent in charge of his baby? Minato had the feeling this was… quite unlikely.

'Ah no, thank you. You're too kind. I just came back to fill on my missing… supplies.'

And with that, the blonde took out the kitchen knife from the drawer and hid it in his kunai pocket. Then he simply walked out of the room, and a moment later something big fell on the floor, probably ending up in million sharp shards. Then the man was back, Wren trailing on his back with two steps until disappearing once again. This time in blonde's hands there was also a wooden ball jointed doll that had been walking around the place from time to time. Gaara hiccupped, catching Yashamaru's attention, but it turned out into something of a not-so-quite endearing smile. A moment later, the blonde opened the shelf to take out the cooking book.

'I regret I don't have salt.' he said to himself. 'Wounds and salt go with each other so well.'

That was when the older redhead peeked inside the room with a frown.

'What is all this noise?' he asked and turned his gaze to his in-law 'What are you doing here? You're supposed to be with Namikaze's son.'

Yashamaru flashed him his teeth. And that was the only answer. A moment later he was out of the kitchen. Daichi would look after him, but instead of that, his gaze seemed to be nailed on the younger redhead.

'What is this?' he muttered slowly, like if he wasn't sure what he was pointing at. Gaara's face changed into the expression of hate and madness and snapped his teeth at Daichi, only to blank out again into the shaking silence. On the left side of his mouth a thin trail of liquid shone stark red against the skin. Minato would have liked to answer something in the lines of 'who the hell cares, I'm killing our in-law and cooking whatever evolutionary vestiges of testicles he has for your family to eat' because - god of war knew, he was asking for it.

Unfortunately, the baby's father decided to make act of appearance, which was exactly the last thing the blonde would have picked as an option. Gaara has been - for lack of better term – 'unnecessarily antagonistic' for most of the last hours; to the point that Minato had just decided to tell his favorite ANBU trio plus additives to makes themselves scarce and ensure neither of the older children barged in, because everything seemed to quickly make the baby's temper turn for the sour.

'I don't know.' he said with a careless shrug, as if Gaara bleeding was an everyday occurrence that by now bored him 'Please check if I wrote this right.'

And he pushed the papers of exercises across the table as a thinly veiled mean to keep the man at that distance and not venture closer. He really could do without daddy dearest- big source of stress for the baby at best of circumstances- to come closer and start poking fingers into the matter. Especially because he wasn't sure he would be able to keep them if he did so. It seemed that sending an army of murderous, cannibalistic toads after Yashamaru's skin would have to wait. Instead, he turned the baby so he'd face him instead, frowning lightly at the bizarre sight before sighing and pulling him close, forehead pressed against the infant's.

'…what is it with you today, Little Red? Don't make me worry like this.'

This time, Gaara didn't close his eyes. But that didn't mean he actually looked at Minato… in the realistic sense of words. The green pupils stared right into Minato one's but they shook uncontrollably, like if Gaara's insides were all put on big jackhammer. He kept impossibly quiet and didn't even react to what Minato did to him. Not immediately anyway. Somewhere between the passing breaths, the blank face suddenly scrunched into the ugliest mask of hatred and as Gaara opened his mouth to roar angrily with voice that couldn't belong to toddler, the sand flew and hit Minato right in the centre of the left cheek.

Right after that the baby broke into loud hysteric sobbing. Daichi on the other hand looked to be pretty immobile. Heck, he looked to be frozen in his own time. Papers layed under his hand untouched and unchecked.

'Why did he do that?' he asked pointlessly obviously just to blurt out something to not make unintelligible sounds. The sand slowly started whispered against the ground as it rose and simply started sticking to Gaara's hands and face. It didn't even take a second to come out as if Gaara actually cried with dirty mud. The blonde reacted immediately - he barely registered the hit initially, only seeing the sand getting in the way and so he quickly plastered the first restriction seal to the baby's forehead before there wouldn't be available skin to adhere it to. It was the old version, which he had improved enough with basic additions it only took about three minutes for it to work as opposed to the usual five. He still hadn't looked at the one the redhead had 'corrected', which actually meant he'd looked at it a billion time sand still couldn't figure if it was the cause the man's bathroom had developed a man-eating wall or not, and not feeling like trying until he was sure of it.

The moment the sand started losing adhesion to Gaara's skin, he brushed the rest off his nape and stuck a second one, removing the first and holding the other in place. Minato stood uneasily for a moment, his cheek stinging, more out of abrasion than actual hurt - it hadn't been a light slap, but it wasn't that hard either, he'd hard worse on the first week of taking care of the toddler, but stand still left a nasty red scratch on his skin. Then he got further away from the man and started walking around the room while bouncing the baby in an attempt to get him to calm down.

'I don't know.' he said with a serenity he didn't feel at all, but that he was well-accustomed to feigning now. 'Correct that, please.'

For some reason it sounded more like 'stay out of my way' than anything else, but he didn't waste time trying to make it sound nicer for his majesty. He *did* want him out of the way after all. Gaara kept crying, uneasy with the whole situation, uneasy with the seal on his skin and uneasy with how Shukaku still kept trashing inside his mind. Inside of his mouth felt weird for the whole day, pulsing with something he couldn't really pinpoint until it changed into something much less nice. Now that the pain subdued again he just felt scared of it all, so if anything, Minato's voice did wonders.

'Mmmu.' he muttered as he hiccupped once or twice, not really calm down yet, but already hugging himself to the man's chest. Daichi blinked and looked at the other side of the wall. He had no idea what that was, but he had the faint idea. Because he lived through that before. This looked like… _teething_.

That sounded so bad when it was along with 'Gaara' in one sentence. He breathed in and out, but he couldn't really take a deep breath. Heck, even shallow breath seemed to be quite deep in comparison how his lungs just barely worked. Slowly, he rose the piece of paper to his face and stared at it, dumbfounded. He just saw ink on the paper. Gaara was teething. Oh gods. He moves his finger along one line and then just dropped the paper and went out of the room.

'…oh, my hero.' the blonde muttered sarcastically, rolling his eyes at the man's retreat, still blissfully unaware of what was going on. 'No, please, don't help me or anything.' he muttered under his breath, already forgetting he had been the one to hint the man really should go away or that he generally only brought more trouble with his mere presence. 'It's not like if I need it.'

Even though he had noticed before Gaara was too old without him showing a single start of denture, the idea he might have decided to start *now* of all times was the furthest thing from his mind. And it wasn't like if Gaara was anywhere as expressive as Naruto, who had gone from a drooling baby to a piranha bent on chewing anything on its path until the first tips of teeth had shown up, and only gotten worse after that. He just hadn't been able to put together Gaara had also started to chew more thoroughly than usual on anything at hand and drooled a lot more than usual.

'Hm, was that my name I heard just now?' he said as he cleaned said excess of saliva, patting at the baby's back comfortingly. 'You got your vowels wrong though, It's Miii. Mi-na-to. Can you say that?'

Gaara only looked up at Minato with utterly tired gaze and just huffed a sound that sound much like 'Mhuh.' Then he parted his mouth again and let out another part of saliva, this time dripping red again. He didn't feel that, his gum slowly took part into growing into balloon, and as it hadn't inflated into the widest possible width yet, it was only lightly tingling. Then green eyes looked up at Minato again as he breathed, both by his nose and mouth.

'Miii.'

That made the blonde's smile freeze in his lips for a second. Not the fact he had uneven blotches of reddish saliva staining his tank top (the things he got doused with daily had steadily built an emotional immunity to such happenings).

'…what was that now?' he asked slowly, blinking down at the soft mint gaze looking up at him. "… Did you just say 'Mii'? Can you say it again?'

Gaara had only kept looking at him, his gaze just as focused on Minato as ever. Maybe yes, maybe no, maybe baby didn't know. For a moment Minato just stayed there, this weird feeling in his chest that wasn't entirely unlike when Kushina had told him she was pregnant making his heart beat loudly.

'…say 'Miii' again for me, please?' he asked softly, like if he didn't want anyone else to hear. Gaara kept looking.

Then, suddenly, like if he was on springs, he climbed upward on Minato's chest, closing the distance between them for another five or six centimeters.

'Miii…' was said, this time in more hushed tone, obviously trying to copy Minato as he flatted against Minato's chest, still observing him like one of the most amazing miracles on earth. That ended in the lack of voice as Gaara just kept his mouth opened. '…muh.'

And that was the end of this impressive feat.

If he hadn't been chocking on some strange thing wedged on his throat, Minato would have been impressed by both the muscle control and the baby's ability to mimic change of tone and pitch, not to mention it was the real first time he bothered with trying to humor him on repeating something. As it was, he took a look around to make sure there was no one looking at them, before pressing a kiss against the baby's forehead.

'…I think I love you, baby.' he said softly, as if he didn't want anyone else to hear it. 'But that's only between me and you, right?'

Gaara didn't answer, obviously not understanding from where all this sudden change of voice and rush of warm tones came from, and he was just as unsure about whether it was a good or a bad thing, but once Minato settled down for a kiss, Gaara also settled down for a 'good'. He didn't close his eyes this time, observing Minato for the whole time, but the light sparkled a little more in his green hair as he kept on staring at the blonde. So far, there was no smiling induced as the baby was yet to learn how it worked. The whole thing was though, summed up in slight 'huff' in which Gaara hid half of his face in Minato's front shirt.

'Good. I had the feeling you'd be good at keeping secrets.' The blonde said with a small smile. He walked to the counter, leaning on it a bit and placing Gaara sideways so he would be looking up at him. 'And now, to more important business- call me crazy, but it looks like if you are bleeding.'

He pulled out the stuck seal on the back of the baby's neck and smoothed the downy red hair, crumpling the paper and throwing it away. The effects should last several more minutes yet, even though the sand seemed to have quieted down along with the baby.

'Did you hurt yourself over there?' he cupped the baby's chin lightly and pressed a bit against his lower lip, something that normally was like a private invitation for the redhead to stick the digit inside his mouth. 'Let me see what's going on there.'

Gaara hesitated for a moment, but as the blonde didn't do anything suspicious, he simply opened his mouth, wide enough for the man to put a digit there and wide enough for him to start sucking on it (so, not wide at all). At the first suck however, he frowned and looked up at Minato with something showing unpleasant feelings behind his green pupils. Then he simply let the finger loose as he opened the mouth to start salivating once more. Minato blinked at this. Under normal circumstances, Gaara would happily suck on it for enough time for his skin to actually shrivel a bit, and then some more.

'What's with you today…?' he asked. Of course Gaara couldn't answer, but by now he probably was used to Minato discussing what he did with him as if he were indeed a participating party in a conversation. 'Are you sickish, baby?'

This time the saliva that gushed out was clear this time, no traces of blood, but when Gaara had tried to nibble on his finger, it had felt weird somehow.

'Don't tell me you got an infection…'

He was about to go out of the room to ask one of his ANBu 'teammates' where he could find one, when the little lady of the house squirreled her way into the room, making a beeline for the fridge.

'Hello, Temari-sama.' he said absently, frowning down at one of the drawers containing all sort of strangely categorized flaks as if he could make them shapeshift into what he needed by will alone. Generally he didn't have much interaction with the little girl, sometimes she'd come by with her brother to spy on him while he was studying, but the most he had seen of her was one afternoon when she had spent the better part of an hour looking at him for 'symptoms' of terminal disease. Normally he wouldn't bother with her, but given how he had just slapped a seal on the baby moments ago and didn't want to put more to stress him, he thought asking wouldn't really hurt.

'Do you have any idea where I can find a flashlight?'

The girl stopped dead in the tracks, but quickly resumed her walk toward the fridge, like if she actually wanted to pretend that she didn't hear a thing. Only a moment later she actually looked at him through her shoulder and gave him a very untrusting glare.

'I know, but if I tell you you can't touch them.' she said with a very serious tone.

'Huh.' Minato looked at her, at Gaara, and then at the sand. Even if he found the flashlight, he'd need both hands to handle Gaara, especially with the sluggish sand. The baby had never fallen from his hold so far, and he didn't want the one time the sand wouldn't catch him to be the first time.

'I'll need someone to aim the light into your brother's mouth.' he said as he wiped yet again the seeming endless river of saliva trailing down the baby's chin. 'Can you find Lark or Thorny devil and give it to them, please?'

Temari looked at Minato for another couple of moments with no trust in her eyes and ran out of the room. A moment later she was dragging Vulture by hand who obviously felt more than flustered over the fact the little heiress decided to treat him like that. His mask was almost falling from his face and the ocarina he usually held close in his pocket was also missing. 'ANBU.' she said with another very serious face and started playing with one of her pigtails. Vulture looked baffled at her and then at Minato.

'I'm on my break.' he said, readjusting mask as hair fell inside it and obstructed his vision. 'What is it I can do for you?'

It wasn't either of the ones he had asked for, and he had asked for them exactly because Vulture was on break, but since he was here already…

'Thank you, little lady.' he said, smiling brightly. 'Can you also get me the small flashlight?' When the little girl trotted off, he gave the older man an apologetic smile. 'I'm sorry, but I need help. Gaara's been acting weird all day and I think he might be getting sick or something. I just put a restraint seal on him and I need to check his mouth, so extra hands are appreciated. You can take off time and return later from your break after this.'

The Vulture stopped and slowly brushed his hands over his pockets. Then, also very slowly, he took out the piece of meat and started feeding himself with it.

'I will help as much as I can.' he said, but he seemed to be rather hesitant over the idea. Gaara scrunched his nose and sneezed, spreading his saliva quite widely on Minato's shirt. Temari came back shortly holding a very smooth and thin flashlight that looked like if it needed inhuman strength to get battery into it. As it had imprinted the Kazekage's mark on its side, it was also very possible that's exactly how it worked. Without a word she gave it to Vulture and started tugging on both of her upper pigtails.

'But I didn't take it.' she said and made three steps back to initiate walking out. She didn't leave completely though, looking at the trio in silence. It was obvious that curiosity and fear battled to death inside her head. Vulture slowly turned the thing in his hands and then offered it to Minato. 'It should start on with this little button on the side.' he said.

'Oh, thank you Gaara, baby, that was just exactly what I was missing…'the blonde said looking down at the mes in his shirt. At least it was spit. Mostly. '…gross.'

He nodded at the little girl again as he reached for something to wipe himself and Gaara with, making sure to try and coax the baby to blow into the tissue this time.

'That's all right princess, it's good that you had it when we needed it.' the good thing was that he was the one asking for it and not the girl's father, that wouldn't have been pretty. Then again, the Kazekage rarely was a bastard to his kids. Sure, he occasionally yelled at them if they were in his way when he didn't want them, and the man had a knack of being terrifying if you were under direct force of his glare (and he was both an adult and used to terrifying people, like when his already prone-to-violence-beloved started mood swinging around the third month of pregnancy), but as far as physical violence towards them, there had been never something remarkable. Just usual sit-in-the-corner and stare at the wall or being forcefully pulled into place. Maybe some rough looking ear-pulling, but nothing of what he'd actually been expecting of the man. And gods knew, the middle one really asked for it sometimes. Maybe the man was a bit of a softie when it came to his kids? Older ones, at least, Gaara was being as stubbornly ignored as ever, and that seemed to suit the three of them just fine. 'Just make sure to leave it where it's supposed to be when we are done.' He looked at the offered flashlight for a moment, before shaking his head.

'No, you use it, unless you want to be the one holding him in place…?' he didn't even need to look to know that would be a negative, so he carefully unlatched Gaara from himself instead. He placed him down on the counter, nuzzling the baby a little to try and make sure he understood he wasn't going anywhere, then leaning down and tilting his chin. 'See if you can aim the light inside his mouth.' he said, pressing a little to try and convince Gaara to open his mouth so he could have a look. Vulture quieted down and looked at the flashlight in his hands. Then hesitated for a moment again as he turned toward Temari.

'Maybe she should leave.'

'Hmm?' Minato turned, looking at the girl. He had expected her to leave by now, as she usually did.

'Temari-sama, you better go away for a little while. We are going to try something dangerous and I don't want you gettign hurt.'

Generally, neither of Gaara's siblings tended to rouse the sand beyond rather weak pushes. Maybe Shukaku didn't even consider them a menace given their small size and chakra levels, but he wasn't going to start risking anyone's safety now.'

The girl looked at Minato and blushed. 'But I'm leaving!' she said and ran out through the door only to peek inside a second later. Vulture kept on looking there as he twirled the flashlight in his hands. Then he looked at Minato and slowly laid the flashlight down. 'I will go search for Lark.'

Minato rolled his eyes. He had just stuck two seals on this baby, it wasn't like if the sand could do much right now. He was about to tell Vulture to just suck it up and put the stupid light where he wanted it when he realized he was about to be a monumental bastard. Why, exactly was he going to risk Vulture and the little girl's safety? Everyone knew that a sweet and docile Gaara didn't meant he'd remain that way on the next Minute. And he had been unusually fussy all of the day, even if now he seemed to be getting over it.

'You are right… see if you can find Thorny Devil instead, and take the princess with you.'

He didn't know if it was because he was a man or because of some other unexplained reason only Gaara and his internal mascot knew of, but the baby was generally less aggressive towards the female ANBU than the other two. Maybe because she was smaller? Vulture nodded and went out, taking the girl by hand even if she didn't seem to be very happy about it. Gaara turned his eyes toward the leaving pair and then looked up at Minato, his mind wandering. He didn't seem to understand much of anything but was vaguely agreeable. After a huff, he rose up his hands and flailed, wanting to be picked up again.

'Uwah!...'

'Yes, yes, but only until they come back.' he said, picking the baby up and settling him on his side with an ease that he wouldn't have even imagined only a month ago 'You are getting heavier there Little Red- now you are *almost* as heavy as two books put together. Do you think you can be persuaded to start moving on your own anytime soon?'

He gave the baby's tummy a light poke. Gaara moved away from the finger as his belly twitched with something that could be recognized as tickling sensation on other babies. There was only one difference – Gaara didn't laugh and acted like if tickling itself was identical with poke of a needle without actual pain involved. After that he settled to watch the finger with more caution as he hugged himself very tightly to Minato's body to prevent the finger from touching him there again. The question about walking remained unanswered. That's how Thorny Devil caught on them.

'…what is the problem?' she asked, looking to be unmoved by the scene before her eyes. As for most of them.

'I think the baby might be coming down with something and that's why he's been fussy lately.' Minato explained, making a gesture with his chin to the dangerous cargo in hands. 'He started spitting blood a few minutes ago, but it seems to have topped now, I want to check if he cut himself or what happened, because the sand slapped me instead of trying to crawl into his mouth and protect him from himself.' Minato sighed and used the same finger to stroke a soft line down the baby's check. 'Can you aim the flashlight into his mouth?'

'Of course.' said the Thorny Devil and without a moment of hesitation flashed it right on the salivating mouth of Gaara. The redhead squinted his eyes a bit and made a face at it, but as it didn't reach his pupils, he relaxed and slowly opened his mouth just as Minato asked of him.

'That's right little red, open wide…' he had to put Gaara back down so he could tilt his head the right angle, but between the two of them he was finally able to see… Nothing at all. Either the wound had healed over or simply the blood had washed away with the saliva, but he inspected as much as he could of the narrow space, from the palate to under the tongue and saw no signs of any sort of cuts or sores of anything like it. And it wasn't like if Gaara had teeth he could cut himself with-

At the thought his mind screeched to a halt with enough force that if it hadn't been metaphorical he would probably have tripped and landed himself on his own face. He let the baby close his mouth, move his tongue around the place a bi to wet it and coaxed him to open back up again, taking a deep breath before peering in. He reached for Thorny Devil's hand and aimed the light a little lower, but there were no fangs to speak off, and that's where Naruto had started. The baby's gums were the same naked, pink from always, and for a moment he thought he had been thankfully just suffered a bad case of pessimism (highly contagious in the company he currently held) but then he saw something out of place on the reigning pink. A little speck of white. And wouldn't you know it, it was poking straight out of Gaara's lower gums.

'Oh.' he heard himself say in some sort of numb, surprised way 'Oh no.'

'He is teething!' exclaimed Thorny Devil, brutally killing all hope he could have stored for a mistake. The tone of her voice was high and pretty unusual for her calm composure she wore all day long around everyone. She moved the flashlight on the whitish piece of gum and exclaimed once again the noise that could only be described as indignant 'aahh', pointing that somehow the whitish speck managed to offend her. 'I have to tell Kazekage-sama!'

And with that, she vanished, not even turning off the flashlight. Gaara looked up at Minato, then protested as the flashlight briefly hit him on the eyes. That went with closing mouth and trying to turn onto his belly.

'Yeah, I… I think he knows already.' The blonde said absently. To no one, really, because the woman had disappeared over five seconds ago. For a moment he just stood there, hearing himself sarcastically ask the Kazekage what would he do once the baby decided to start teething. And now this. Talk about Karmic retribution. No wonder the redhead had left in such a hurry- though that didn't explain why he hadn't so much as thought of warning Minato against it.

'…what are we going to do with you now, Little Red?' he asked quietly, reaching for the lantern and turning it off while he stared at the baby with a worried expression. Actually he should be asking the redhead what would he be doing to them from now on. As far as he knew, this development hardly helped made babies any happier or more prone to concession towards adults who didn't understand their needs immediately. Carefully, he scooped the baby up and hugged it close stroking it's back soothingly. He needed to get the group of ANBU- and their owner. But first, he had a letter to write.


	14. uǝǝʇɹnoɟ ɹǝqɯnu ɹǝʇdɐɥɔ

Thorny Devil managed to fall into the spare room of ANBUs, accidentally push Wren against the bookshelf and spill the coffee the Lark was about to start drinking. But before any of the men could point a finger at her that she just wasted the whole cup of life-saving liquids (with adds) and disturb her sleeping schedule for the nearest two weeks she caught on the Lark and, as every woman in need, started shaking him feverishly to the point pencil and a few sheets of paper joined the brown stain on the floor.

'It's jinchuuriki!' she hollered in high pitched voice, so unusual to her stance, making all of them stand up from their seats 'The jinchuuriki started teething! He already has one tooth showing!'

And that was enough. Not a moment later the three-cell men marched out right toward the room where Minato stationed. Additional block of paper and three new unpacked pencils accompanied them from under Wren's hand with utmost ninja-like silence. Thorny Devil at the same time skipped two steps at a time to the second level of Kazekage's mansion. She was so flustered and shaken over what she had seen she didn't even think twice about that she knocked far too shortly against the office's door or that she entered it without the sign of invitation. What greeted her was pale face of Kazekage covered in cold sweat, but she didn't notice even that.

'Kazekage-sama!...' she rasped feverishly against her tight mask of Thorny Devil, trying her best to regain her breath 'Kazekage-sama!... red alert!... I just found… found out that the jinchuuriki-'

The hand landing harshly on the desk's surface cut her off right in the middle of the sentence.

'Subordination!' yelled Daichi with voice that almost turned his eyes all white 'Do anyone of you even know that word anymore?'

The girl stopped and slowly let go the breath that got stuck in her throat. Then, slowly, her gaze fell on the floor. White ANBU's mask, the mask of Roadrunner; it lied there, useless and broken in three uneven pieces. A trail of blood followed from it in rather wide blotches on the floor and ended just behind the desk that cut off her vision right from the place where she stood. Only now that her blood stopped deafening her sense of hearing she heard quiet moaning from behind the desk. A slight careen to the right also showed the legs of someone who did look like Roadrunner. They seemed to be whole, just as his body and arms. The way he clutched at his face and how it bled buckets from between the fingers however, was another story. Daichi showed his canines in more than threatening way. Thorny Devil felt how her skin tightened on her neck.

'Army of idiots! Soldiers from dirt, more useless than sand clones!' he howled, though more than anger, during his voice sounded fear. He did his best to hide it, but he failed at it. He had been trashing inside his office for past hour like a caged beast and he came to nothing – completely nothing at all. He had no idea how to deal with teething Gaara, or rather – he didn't want to even get there. It's been some time since he had seen Gaara turning into the bundle of pure hatred and it shook with his well being to the point of heavy shock. He had seen it only a couple of times in his life and it was in the earliest days of the redhead's life – when as a toddler he desperately needed to sleep for most of the day and night and wasn't allowed to even blink for longer. At such times Shukaku simply pulled a nightmare on them, breaking through all seals and the whole village was more than once on the verge of death. He didn't even want to count the deaths from there or he'd break. And now the first thing Gaara did over the bloody tooth was to snap at Minato, his guardian angel and practically the thing closest to his personal paradise. He didn't even want to think what would happen when other teeth would join others or worse, would come slowly, one at a time, making it a painful path of suffering through twenty steps. Nobody knew how jinchuuriki would develop in anatomical changes as nobody put monsters into unborn babies. His future was dark and unknown and he didn't want to face it, so he did first thing he found soothing at best; he changed his fear into rage and poured it on the first person that stood nearby, and it came out to be Roadrunner. It was a good thing actually, considering that they had some unclosed problems with what he did, thanks to that he wouldn't have to search for justification later. Even if he really wasn't against all that happened.

But Yashamaru was family and things concerning family had to come first. Even if a member of family was the slyest of foxes. So he aimed for that face. After all it was the thing Roadrunner was the most proud of. Maybe now he would wear the ANBU mask with more pride, that whore.

'Whoever gave you right to even look at my personal medic?' he seethed, looking at Roadrunner. The man only kept moaning, hidden in his personal world of pain 'I don't even want to know what's happened or why did you decide to break both of his hands – something a medic needs for work like a ninja needs his tools – but I want you to stay away from him as far as you can. Do you hear me?'

No response. Only more never stopping moaning that kept on being uttered like a broken record. Maybe he damaged his brain. He didn't know; he didn't care. He kicked the man on the side, making him fly near his mask and forcing him to remove both hands from his face. Thorny Devil obviously gasped at the sight but he didn't want to even check what made her utter such sound in this atmosphere. He turned her eye to her, frowning with the rage that still didn't subdue down.

'Get out.' he said to the man who slowly gathered the pieces of his mask from the floor. Then he waited painstakingly long seven seconds as the fastest of ANBUs slowly gathered it, got up spreading even more blood over his floor and practically crawled out of his room on his feet, only because he would kill him if he would see he'd do that on his knees. When the door closed he sat behind the desk and turned around on the chair to not face the terrified girl anymore. 'What do you want.'

'J-jinchuuriki…' said the girl in a bit squeaky tone but then she regained her posture '…I mean, Gaara-sama is causing problems. I discovered he had started teething. He has blood coming from his mouth and he seems to be very lively.'

'And you're telling me this now.' he seethed in ironical tone, knowing very well he didn't let her tell anything else sooner. The taste of power over people was rotten but he was far too deep to not live with love-hate relationship with it. 'Go to form a barrier around him and have the barrier nins watching him all the time. If he gets naughty, send for me. Dismissed.'

The girl bowed and vanished. Daichi let out the breath through his nose. Then took the book from his personal library and threw it against the wall. What a screwed up life he led.

#+#+#+#+#+#

Minato was as badly frightened as the Kazekage- perhaps even more. He still wasn't scared of Gaara himself, the little redhead scarcely could be blamed for anything going around. Any baby feeling bad was prone to tantrums, kicking, squirming and basically attacking anything around them to the best of the abilities their tiny, weak bodies allowed them to. It wasn't Gaara's fault that some GENIUS had had the fantastic idea of stuffing a deranged monster into his brain, and that said monster made him able to project his tantrums, kicking and general fussing into the environment. Or that the environment happened to be solid, abrasive and plentiful.

No, he was scared of what the baby could do, and that if anything happened to him, Naruto would be brought back to Konoha. In the end it all came back to that. The first days after Kushina's death Minato had been too busy being drugged out of his ass while the burns and gaping holes in his body were treated to know what had happened. He'd told Sarutobi-sensei what he should do on regards of Naruto, what he should tell the civilians and ninja that had managed to survive the Kyuubi's attack.

A little part of him still was sure the man had listened to him, that his sensei's master had done everything he could to make sure people would understand what had really happened, how it would have even a matter of decades- maybe even less before the monster was back to destroy everything they had, manipulated by a psycho in a arts and craft mask or not. If Kushina had died on her own and taken the monster down with her, all they would have managed was to make the creature even more pissed at them- they might know it wouldn't be permanent, but there were few things Bijuus feared more than death. By tying it to his son he had prevented that from happening, and how had everyone reacted?

Naruto had had seventeen attempts on his life just on the first week of his life.

In the end it was Sarutobi who had taken the baby in, because no nurse wanted to tend to him and because the Sandaime Hokage feared that rather than treat him they would try to poison him if any doctor would try to approach him. Kakashi had told him how Uchiha Mikoto had wanted to take Naruto in until he was out of the hospital, but had been gently rejected by the Hokage- or maybe Fugaku himself. Minato didn't know and didn't want to find out. Even if it hadn't been the latter, he didn't know if Naruto would have been safer or even in greater danger, surrounded by a whole district of highly trained ninja police. As it turned out - surprisingly - Minato did happen to mind.

He minded so much that when the council basically told him he was to give them his son so they could rise him in the loveliest little lab; apart from people and human contact while they conducted all sort of experiments to make sure he wouldn't accidentally release the Kyuubi and figure dout how to make sure he grew up to be the tamest, greatest weapon Fire country had ever been in possession of, Minato had smiled and told them it would only happen over some dead bodies. Theirs, to be precise.

The legal, political and power battle that followed was as fierce as short lived- Minato used every dirty trick he could think of. He asked for every favor he had ever done, squeezed every last and dirtiest bit of blackmail he had accumulated over years as bodyguard, ANBU captain and Hokage, called upon the treaties of friendship Konoha had with the Uzumaki clan- which was perhaps the one true reason to be relieved Kushina and he had decided to be dumb and stick to old Konoha tradition where people waited for baby's safe delivery before asking for mother's hand in marriage

It didn't matter that Minato took care of Naruto as his son, that everyone with sight would be able to figure out he was his son – Until Minato legally claimed him as his, Naruto was a member of the Uzumaki clan, and they were fierce to protect their own.

They might have lost their land and scattered all over the continent, but they were still Konoha's allies. It didn't spoke well of Leaf Village as a hole if they started enforcing incarceration on their own allies. Especially if Konoha wanted to remain updated on the clan's constantly expanding knowledge of sealing methods. In the end, the council had given an ultimatum. Minato would be allowed (how generous!) to keep his own son under his care, provided that he would give up his power and influence as Hokage and left the village. Everyone would know he had selfishly chosen his son over his responsibility as a Kage and treat him accordingly (like a traitor) and live his life with the council constantly breathing down his neck to know what he was doing, where he was and ensuring that he didn't take Naruto far away they wouldn't have an use for this.

He could choose this and probably be driven to suicide by ostracism alone, like what had happened to the White Fang, or he could just give this baby he could hardly call his own or have any attachment to, and go on with his life. Start another family, had new kids that wouldn't be monsters. Minato had told them they bored him and asked them to tell him where was he supposed to sign. And this is where he was now.

If nothing else, meeting Gaara had only cemented his belief he had done the right thing- Sure, they were essentially incarcerated in this country, but at least he wouldn't have to live his life wondering if someone was going to put a knife on his son because he took his eyes off him for a Minute. No one in Suna knew what Naruto was, and he planned to keep it that way. He wanted Naruto to have as normal a childhood as far as shinobi life standards allowed it. If it hadn't been for that sacrifice, Naruto would have been the one alone in a locked room with no one to take care of him until some idiot with sticky fingers decided to stick his nose when no one called for him. And with everyone in Konoha knowing what he was, chances weren't really very high.

So no, he couldn't afford to let this baby kill him here and now. So he would have very much liked someone to come and tell him everything was going to be all right and that he was just exaggerating and being paranoid as result of combining the unrelenting heat and a developing dose of cabin fever. Unfortunately, just when he was about to ask for this, Lark, Wren and Vulture decided to appear, each one of them looking like if they were holding their own funeral procession. Not exactly the most reassuring of sight. In fact, they probably looked like if they needed it more than he did, and he was basing this on body language alone. He took a look at the tense, grim ANBU and cocked his head.

'What.'

'We heard there had been problem.' said Vulture and sat down in the nearest corner. 'So we came to assist.' The notepad was opened and Wren slowly started writing something in it. Lark sat down on the floor with crossed legs.

'To observe.' he added.

'Ah.' Minato said, nodding lightly, looking down at Gaara and then pulling at him a little so they ANBU would be able to look at him. 'It's a baby. It's drooling. Not too long ago he sneezed all over me and I need a new shirt.'

Lark and Wren looked at each other, and then Wren vanished. Only to show up with a shirt that looked like a mash up of bad fashions, including brown stripes with bright blue dots over it.

'You're welcome.' he said simply as he offered it to Minato.

Minato looked at it, then back at the ANBu librarian.

'I don't even know where you would get such a thing.' he said brightly, adjusting Gaara on his grip again when the baby flailed a little. 'Your fetishes scare me. Go get me something normal- and for gods sake, make it sleeveless. I don't know how you can go around cloaked all day in this heat.'

He thought about the request for a moment.

'Something sleeveless my size. And gender.'

This time Lark vanished and kept on being gone until Thorny Devil entered the room. Before she had any chance to greet anyone else he reappeared with a scarcely usual bag of potatoes all civilians wore around this place, looking suspiciously like if sleeves were actually just cut off from it. Then he offered it to Minato without a word. Gaara looked at them appearing and reappearing like a boring TV show. Quite true it was as he saw such things endlessly in his whole life. Minato looked at it, then at the man, and sighed before taking the shirt and inspecting it. Thank goodness he specified size and gender, otherwise he'd have gotten something even bigger. What was this, Jerboa's hand-me-downs?

'You know, you can go through my clothes.' he said as he sat Indian style and placed the baby on his lap, where he'd be sure not to roll off while he produced a Kunai and nicked the material, before ripping a long strip of the waist. He dangled it a few inches over the baby's face before letting him take it.

'I don't mind. I don't have anything to be ashamed of.' And he ripped another long strip 'Just the usual pornography.'

That made the Wren look up from his place, but he hung his head down again pretty quickly.

'Are you really hung up on having your shirt?' said the Lark getting up again. 'Because of you are…'

'I'll get it.' said the Vulture simply, interrupting the uneasy but confidential tone of Lark who didn't really want to go and check what hid under the 'pornography' and how real it was. Konohanins could be so obscene sometimes. 'Is there any specific one I should bring?'

Gaara gladly took the stripes, but quickly let go of them as they didn't seem to be anything interesting nor anything edible enough to swallow. The place in his gum was now swollen enough to hurt when he bit on things so he didn't even try to chew on the material.

'Please, do it quick.' said Thorny Devil 'We will have company soon.'

Minato shook his head in negative - why bother, now he had already shortened this thing so he wouldn't look completely ridiculous on him (now it would just go for relatively ridiculous) and if Gaara was going to keep spitting at him, all the better he didn't wear his actual shirts for it. The tone made him pause, though.

'… the cover is orange and called 'Icha Icha'.' he said as he pulled off the shirt, momentarily covering the sly smile. "Collector's edition. All five volume sprinted so far.'

Came with perks of having your sensei being the one writing them.

'Just kidding though- I left them at home. If anyone wants to borrow them, just tell the toad I said you could.'

All ANBUs just looked at each other and nobody moved from the spot. Vulture was actually the only one to come back to his place from where he came out to begin with. Gaara lightly threw the strip of material up and watched it fall down on the floor. Not very soon later a group of four other ANBUs – all of them visibly female – walked in. They had identical masks resembling harvest ants and the only difference that could be told between them all was their height and the color of their very small lines over the black holes of eyes.

'We're the barrier ninjas.' said the tallest of them. 'We come on order of Kazekage-sama. We will set barrier now.'

And with that, they sat down in a square and covered the whole room in a light transparent glassy shield.

'No, please, stop that-' Minato said, immediately finishing stuffing his head through the new shirt and picking the baby back up. 'Turn that thing off.'

Nobody moved or did a thing. Only Wren kept on writing something in the notepad.

'Orders are orders.' said the smallest one and nothing changed.

'Great, I'm ordering you to stop now, and if you still don't want to stop, I'm ordering you to tell Kazekage-sama I'm ordering you to stop.'

_Yes, Kazekage-sama, please do go on and bring even more people he doesn't know and have them use powerful chakra all over a baby feeling unwell, I'm sure that won't stress him at all._Just as if Gaara had only been waiting for that, he rose up his head and looked at Minato with a frown. Something seemed to be not right again, but this time it was an old feeling he already knew. Nevertheless, he communicated all of them to the world with the one and same signal.He meeped and tried to push finger in his mouth, but took it out immediately as it wasn't pleasant and started crying. During that, his stomach let out a rumble loud enough for everyone in room to be heard. All ants rose up and one of them vanished. The barrier changed from a square to triangle.

Oh, this wasn't good. Of course Gaara's be hungry- he'd been eating less than usual, but Minato had thought it was just him being moody, not teeth pains. After all, Naruto didn't stop chewing on things, if anything he had started to chew on them even more furiously than before. Maybe his baby had anger issues? Kushina would be proud.

'…guys?' Minato shushed at Gaara softly, pulling him up and rocking the little body 'Does anyone here know some jutsu to cool down things fast? Not frozen, just cool.'

Wren rose his hand up high.

'I love you, Wren.' Minato said in the middle of tending to fussing baby. 'Get the baby's mix from the refrigerator cool down the nipple, just don't let it freeze.'

Given how the milk irritated him, he'd taken to have the baby's daily batch already watered down prepared so he could just put the thing to heat and be done with it. It seemed Gaara was going to learn to drink cold milk today.

The Wren did just that. He was gone maybe for a few seconds, during which missing ant came back and snapped her fingers; after that, all ants vanished, but if anyone concentrated, it was obvious they stayed nearby. When Gaara finally got his bottle he latched on it with unforeseen greed – he stopped only after the second swallow as he saw that milk had different temperature now. He stayed still for a moment, looking pensively at the bottle as it kept on being cold in his hands and very slowly took it in his mouth again, watching Minato like if somehow he was the one who was in control of how things worked out. A moment later he was once again greedily swallowing it, even if from time to time he actually moved his jaw down a bit due the irritation and let the milk spill outside his mouth.

'Yes, I know baby.' he said in the warm, affectionate tones he used when he was trying to coax Gaara to do something he was suspicious of. He didn't try to pressure him and waited until Gaara finished analyzing weather this was a good thing or not before letting him take the nipple again in his mouth 'It's cold so it will feel better, and in this heat, anything cold feels better, right? -okay, ease up there; we don't want you to get a brain freeze.'

He wiped the baby's chin and straightened a bit the angle of the bottle so the baby would be chugging down at lesser speed. He didn't think cold milk would hurt him, because it hadn't hurt his son. But then again, they didn't even drink milk from the same animal, so he was basically gambling away. Gaara kept on looking at him as he talked to him, and eventually closed his eyes out of pure pleasure at how the milk filled his stomach with accompaniment with soft loving tones he had never imagined before could exist. He opened them right away just to look at Minato again and make sure he was still there and slowly let himself to drift away as he looked at the other unwelcome but not really bothering people in the room. Then he opened his eyes again to look at Minato and let out a responsive sound around the nipple. He didn't let go of the bottle for another time, not until it emptied to the last drop and then he kept on sucking on it even longer, frowning when it didn't let him swallow anything but air. Once it fell out of his mouth, he had the expression of a grim reaper during the most serious job he ever had to do. Then he once again put finger in his mouth and started sucking on it as the cold numbed the swollen gum and it didn't irritate him enough to stop. Then he looked up at Minato and reached out for the taken bottle.

'Ubu!' was the lord's demand. Minato looked at the baby, before lifting the bottle and inspecting it. Empty. Completely empty. Gaara probably hadn't finished a whole bottle for at least a week. And hadn't he always hoped the baby would start eating more so he'd gain some much needed weight?

'You are still hungry?' he looked at the baby and again at the bottle, before looking at the ANBU team. All mask stared back impassibly.

'…can anyone ask Ants if any of them they have kids?' he said, taking a rag and pulling Gaara to his shoulder so he could help him burp. He had no idea if Gaara should be allowed to have more or wait out a bit so he wouldn't get sick. 'If no one does, someone's going to have to ask Kazekage-sama.'

Yashamaru's disappearance from the household apparently had promoted the man to 'Member of human's species with the most knowledge on how to handle kids'. That alone should tell how little did all of them know. All ANBUs looked at each other in silence. It seemed that as much as Minato was a ninja, he was still being misinformed. Not that they could blame him since he was a foreigner, but then, he has even stationing here for awhile and he should have known some structures deeper…

'No use asking them.' said the only kunoichi 'I doubt they will ever know the answer. I will go ask for Kazekage-sama's presence.'

And once again, one of the person of the room had vanished. Gaara looked at it with a frown then his attention was back to the bottle as he reached for it again, sure that between the short talk the thing had to get filled again, even if there was no visible change.

'Noo, baby.' Minato said in his bets 'not yet' voice a she pulled Gaara back against his shoulder and started patting him again. 'First you burp, and then we'll decide if you need more milk or not, all right?'

Gaara let out an annoyed squeak at the bottle being taken away but he leaned over the shoulder obediently; indeed, he felt like if he could use such action now. As he burped and let the milk dribble down his chin, the older redhead descended down the stairs, looking like if he became anemic during last two hours.

'What's happened?' he asked, looking obviously disturbed. Gaara looked up at him and something flashed in his eyes, but he didn't do a thing. Instead, he started searching for a bottle with his eyes. Minato in the meantime unscrewed the bottle and gave Gaara the cool nipple to play with while he looked at the bottle- hopefully baby would interpret it as it being refilled.

'Baby's still hungry. Wren cooled the bottle so it wouldn't hurt his gums, but since it's the first time he takes it cold, I'm not sure he should have it.' je left the bottle over the table. 'I don't want him getting sick over it. On the other hands, he hasn't been eating much for days, so I'm not sure how much to give him, should I give him some.'

Daichi looked at him, then at the bottle. Gaara obediently took the cold nipple in his hands and turned it upside down, looking at what was inside the such turned object and tried sloppily gnawing at the brim of it. What?... What did the man want from him? He was the leader of a country, not a freaking… a…

…well, okay, he was a parent. But he wasn't a nanny and such things as 'how' and 'how much' that touched food were completely unknown to him. He looked at how Gaara frowned looking at the empty bottle, then covered his face with a hand. At such situation he had to work through deduction. What would make baby monster not angry?

'Give him as much as he wants.' he said. After all, Shukaku will stop him before the redhead would hurt himself, right? That's why the monster was there to begin with, as an ultimate weapon, but also ultimate protection. 'We have enough for him to eat for the next week, the amount shouldn't be a problem.'

Minato looked at him with an expression that obviously asked 'are you *sure* you know more than I do?', but in the end just shrugged and took the dirty towel off. If baby was hungry, he probably could do with a bit more of milk, he'd just have to make sure he didn't have too much of it.

'I'll need that back.' he said, placing his hand palm up for the baby to return the nipple to him. Gaara looked at him and in response, took the thing into his mouth, trying to suck at it. Minato rose his eyebrows and made a 'come on' gesture with his hands.

'I'll need that if you have any interest in feeding, Little Red.'

Gaara slowly sucked on the thing while he stared at Minato, then he blinked and let go of it right into Minato's hand, thoroughly salivated.

'Very good.' he wiped the thing off before throwing it at Wren for a second cooling. It was a matter of moments to have the thing ready for the baby to take, but just a she was about to let the child take it, he held is slightly off, looking at him seriously.

'…say 'Mii' again.'

Gaara looked at him in silence as he scanned through Minato's eyes and mouth. Then he turned his head toward Wren as he vanished again and flailed toward him. After a moment of silence he turned back to Minato with a very unhappy frown.

'Bubu!'

'Miiii.'

Gaara only looked at Minato again and then looked again at the spot where Wren was just five seconds before. Then his eyes once again fell at the Kazekage who seemed to not be moving anywhere else, at least not for now. Then he skimmed through the rest of people. Once his eyes fell on Lark, something clicked and a handful of sand shot right up from the floor, catching the man by the neck. The only thing the ANBU managed to do was to rise up one arm high enough to block at least part of the sand from catching him fully around the chest and jaw. Gaara's pupils once again started shaking as he slowly rose up his lips to let the saliva drip onto his chin.

'Bubu!...'

Just like that Gaara got his bottle.

'Put him down.' The paling blonde said seriously, pointing at the ANBU. He had a seal ready, but it would take at least thirty second for it to make the sand loose enough, and if he startled the baby he might snap something

'Down, Gaara.'

The redhead looked at the ANBU for a moment, but then the bottle caught his attention and he immediately forgot about the whole situation. Lark fell down right on his bottom while Gaara started chugging down at the milk even more ferociously than on the previous one. Slowly, even his belly rose and became more hard as it was filled to it's best.

'Sorry Lark.' the blonde said, looking in alarm at the baby's belly. Gaara never ate this much. Never.

'Everyone keep seals ready.' he said as he stuck the first one on the back of Gaara's neck 'We are going to be changing them every fifteen minutes. Someone start timing.'

And they didn't have to wait much. As Gaara was put up to burp the food, he simply vomited with just swallowed milk, making Minato's back shirt wet and smelling of fertile donkey female. After a moment of silence as everyone stared as it sunk into the material, Gaara broke in tears, uncomfortable with the experience he had to endure just so suddenly. But before the ANBUs had even time to actually start the barrier or even climb up the walls, he once again reached out for the bottle and wailed loudly at it, not stopping the crying. Sand slowly started sizzling on the floor like piece of fat over the hot frying pan.

'…I want you to sign me an IOU worth shower for this.' Minato told the Kazekage, teeth practically chattering as he shuddered in disgust. It wasn't the first time a baby puked on him. Not being the first time didn't make it the single least more appealing than last time had been.

So… Gross…

'I want it on writing!' he said again, getting up and starting to rock the baby in an attempt to make him calm down. Daichi's eyes only glinted at that.

'It's milk on the shirt. Just change clothes.' he said as he walked from one corner to the other one. 'Next time you will ask will be a wash of clothes everytime they get covered in dirt.'

Gaara didn't want to calm down. He hid his face into Minato's face for a short while, but then he once again reached out for the bottle that laid out of his reaching range.

'I just changed. I want that shower-' he nodded at Vulture's sign that the first fifteen minutes had passed and placed a second seal '…and now because you said so I also want my clothes clean.'

He was about to add he wanted them hand washed by the man himself, but then Gaara started going at the bottle again. At loss, Minato gave it at him. It was empty, but maybe the cool nipple would be good as a makeshift dummy or something.

'I wrote a letter.'

'If you want shower ask someone to give their share of water to you.' said Daichi with a careless shrug. 'Or shower together with someone else. I'm not wasting water on some barely swallowed milk and dirty shirt.'

Gaara started sucking on the empty bottle and it seemed to work for him; for at least this very moment. But it was becoming obvious he saw through this when the sucking slowed down and his face turned more pink.

'What letter?'

'On the table.' the blonde said, gesturing with his chin as he kept rocking the baby lightly in a helpless attempt to calm him down. The way the baby was acting wasn't normal at all, Gaara rarely finished a whole bottle, and now he chugged two down in a blink and kept asking for more?

He was so desperate he actually wished Yashamaru was here, and not only because he was afraid he'd do unspeakable things to his baby. Then again, if Yashamaru had been there, who knew if anyone would have been able to coheres him into approaching Gaara?

'It's for a friend of my lover. She has two of the most perfect kids you could imagine.' he tried not to think about how Kushina had gushed on about how cute Mikoto's second child had been- to the point he'd looked like a baby girl, and how she hoped he and Naruto would grow to be as good friends as their respective mothers were. How could they have known what would happen just a few hours later?

'Since you are going to be reading my mail either way, you might as well read it before I seal it down and send it.' he said a little sarcastically, though not particularly angry about the suggestion- of course they'd check what he wrote back home. They would do that even if he hadn't known about Gaara's existence. The letter on itself wasn't remarkable in every aspect, Minato briefly apologized for the long term of silence claiming adjusting to the weather and learning to deal with a baby without any sort of experience as an excuse, briefly inquired about how her family was doing and asked her to keep an eye on Kakashi before somewhat desperately tackling the topic of Naruto having begun teething and him being out of his mind without knowing how to deal with it, and sort of pleaded her for any sort of long or short term sort of help on how to address the matter.

From the description of the baby's ailments and the progress of said teething, however, it was obvious he was referring to Gaara. Daichi read through this with rather unpleasant frown.

'Why are you sending this outside the village.' he said as he scanned through the paper. 'Do you want people to track down to Gaara?'

Minato sighed - the melodramatic effect might have been more efficient if Gaara hadn't accidentally backhanded him in mid-flail halfway- before turning to the man.

'Yes, I'm sure they'll be able to connect the dots to the son no one but the people here know even exists and figure out he's a jinchuuriki based solely on the fact it's a baby and it's teething. God knows I couldn't possibly have one of my own in my own house.' He adjusted Gaara again, trying to stroke his nape to see if that calmed him down a bit better than the rocking. 'Sign it and send it. The sooner we have an answer the better for all of us.'

'Your sarcasm wasn't needed to explain that.' said Daichi with even more deepened frown as he fished out the pen from his pocket and signed the letter. 'Gods only know what a misery would happen if we had two jinchuurikis here and at stage of a baby. I don't want to even imagine such things.'

And with that, he forwarded the letter to the nearest person who had immediately vanished along with it. Gaara threw bottle on the floor and very loudly demanded attention with a shout that was more angry than needy.

'Yeah… that'd be crazy.' the blonde muttered morosely, fighting with the squirming child in arms to keep him from falling out. He looked after the disappearing ANBU in stress, wondering if there was any way to make the letter get there any faster. Suna might be generally low in funds and not count with the most impressive numbers when it came to the military, but they surely bred some of the best messenger hawks Minato had ever seen. It should barley take a full day for it to arrive to Konoha. What worried him was how long it would take for the woman to answer, or if she'd even bother to. Minato and the dark haired beauty hadn't been especially close, generally he'd known her in quality of 'Fuu's girlfriend', 'Fuu's fiancee', ''Fuu's wife' and 'mother of 'Fuu's child'.

It was only after everyone figured out he was the named bastard who had knocked Kushina up and (supposedly) ran off into the sunset to avoid responsibility that the woman had come over. At the time he had been at the hospital and she had told him how sorry she was and how she'd considered Kushina as close to a sister and how he could count on her and her family to help with the child they had conceived and anything he could need -there might have been a bit of crying involved on such a speech, but he'd been close to despair and still a bit drugged, so he preferred not to think about it too much- but that had been then.

Minato didn't care what Konoha thought of him by now, but he did worry what over half a year amidst the gossip might do to change anyone's mind. And if she didn't answer, he'd have to … No, he didn't even want to go there. Not if it could be helped. He concentrated upon the child instead, picking the bottle and leaving it on the counter before leaning on it himself, pulling Gaara close again so he'd stare into his face.

'Gaara, baby, you can't still be hungry,' he said sternly. 'You already ate twice and puked on me once, that's more than enough for the night.'

Gaara stared back, his expression restless and unevened. The way he clamped his mouth and glared at Minato like if he somehow found a new enemy didn't indicate he understood what was good for him. At all.

'Bubu!...' he said and it was a threatening tone of voice, mostly childish but with animalistic undertones. He turned his attention to the bottle and the sand immediately delivered it; he started sucking on it again, but dropped it on the floor just as quickly. His anger grew and showed up as another thin trickle of blood along the chin. The tooth was slowly making it through the gums also. 'Ahnnn!...'

Minato frowned as the sand grappled around like a drunkard before delivering the bottle to the baby, who shook at it as if he could self-generate the milk by kinetic energy and then dropped it again. Minato picked it once more and pointed at the baby with it.

'Gaara; I can clean it and cool the nipple again for you and I'll even pretend that's not practically a dummy and let you chew on it, but you are not eating again for at least an hour or more.'He used the back of his hand to wipe the baby's chin, unsettled by the contrast of the red against Gaara's pale skin. At loss, he turned to look at the Kazekage. '…Naruto didn't bleed like this when he started teething, is this normal?'

Daichi had only looked to the window and shrugged.

'Not that I know of it.' he said, avoiding looking a baby that once again tried to get the bottle within the range of reach 'But nothing is normal with this thing.'

Which was obvious – Gaara simply should have died because of all abuse that was inflicted upon his lithe newborn frame, but he didn't and this would be ridiculous if a hemorrhage from a growing tooth would e his end. The little redhead let out even louder shout, this time bordering on a quite deafening scream, his face now the mask of quite angry person. Then once again tried to get closer to the bottle.

The blonde's eyes hardened at the Kazekage's words, and he cradled Gaara closer in response, despite how violent he was becoming. It was something that always seemed to happen when the two were in the same room, the older redhead would inevitably say something on regards of his own son being something other than human and Minato would just get pissed at him and extra protective of the redhead. This didn't seem to change no matter how many times Gaara had already flattened him against walls and ceilings or that he was essentially a hostage to this child.

'Little Red…' again he started pacing around with the baby in his arms. The bottle was piled with sand again, rendering it unusable. 'Wren, please cold down another bottle? Put very little milk on it.'

He didn't think it was a good idea, but he was at his wits end here.

'…Maki-san gave Naruto some weird, crunchy weed-thing.' he said while he raked his memory for anything that could help, and suddenly remembering the stalks the younger girl had left him with. It hadn't helped very much- Naruto tended to just cry for attention until he tired of it, but at least munching on the thing seemed to distract him a bit. And Gaara tended to have longer attention span that his son when it came to new things. 'I'm not sure what it was, but it's spicy and sweetish.'

And actually seemed to work better on calming Minato down better than his son.

'Licorice.' muttered Daichi and sat down on the nearest chair. It seemed that this one would be long and never-ending matter. 'I wouldn't give him licorice for one tooth. Besides, do you want him to feel more pain once he starts brushing tender flesh over the branch? I don't want a crazy house here.'

'Here.' repeated like an echo Wren, showing up with another bottle of milk, properly cooled down. Gaara immediately turned his eyes to it and 'nhhhed' toward it, reaching out for the object.

'Well, I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about kids so I just improvise with mine.' the younger man said somewhat defensively, taking the bottle and offering it to the baby while making sure to keep it at an angle that wouldn't have the baby chugging it down like his Master's love usually did with sake. '…I never had to take care of one before, and I didn't have much age difference with my younger siblings or cousins. Since I came here I managed by listening to the old lady who lives next to me or Maki-san.'

And Gaara wasn't the right age, temperament or situation for him to use his very limited experience with his own soon accurately 75% of the time. Minato leaned again on the counter, tiredness and frustration obvious on his demeanor as he slumped against the surface.

'Don't you have anything that will numb his gums?'

'There should be some gel that would numb the pains of internal tissue in my cabinet…' said Daichi with a light frown. Then he flicked one of his fingers and another ANBU vanished only to reappear with it in hand. Gaara sucked on the bottle with maniacal obsession, until at one point he hiccupped and vomited with milk again, not even trying to get the bottle out of his mouth. The way he looked at Minato during that was a show of the panic that slowly arose inside the kid. Minato immediately pulled the bottle away, too unsettled by what was going on to make any of his usual fussing about the disgust he felt at the warm liquid spreading over his front.

'Gaara, slow down, you are going to choke like this…!'

The baby only looked up at him, and for one pensive moment when it looked like if he was about to cry the silence ensued, followed with the sound of vomit dripping on the ground (the master of the household looked at it as if it contained Chinese porcelain that was being carelessly crushed on the floor). After that, the kid resumed the feverish sucking until he once again vomited. His stare changed from scared to bewildered as he spilled more milk on the ground and then… he started drinking again until the bottle was completely empty.

The blonde shuddered lightly. Everything seemed to smell like milk, which wasn't really terrible as far as unpleasant scents went. Only in this heat he knew for sure it would be so in a matter of twenty minutes. He bit his lip, slowly letting go of the bottle now that the bottle was empty and producing a third seal to stick on the little redhead at Vulture's sign another fifteen minutes had passed. He held the piece of paper in place until he was sure that it would stick, slowly rising his eyes to meet the dark ones across the table, the message on them all too clear.

_What now?_

Daichi didn't answer, not immediately. He just kept observing as Gaara started sucking on empty bottle then dropped it on the floor and burped without any satisfaction and how a trickle of milk dribbled down his chin. And then, how after five seconds, he looked down at the floor and started reaching for it again.

'…how much more milk do we have?...' he asked, regretting for yet another time that in Suna there weren't any Hyuuga doujutsu possessors so they could see what was going on with Gaara from the inside. This behavior was weird, Gaara always ate very little and never showed a need to eat more than he was given (unless it was less than five swallowing gulps). Why was this happening? He couldn't tell. Lack of calcium possibly? Was the monster freaking out over the small tooth?

'Enough for a day of such drinking.' whispered the Thorny Devil just behind his ear. He nodded and looked up at Minato.

'We will keep going like that then. Maybe in-between we can gather more information from the Monk itself so we would know in what direction we should work.'

'We can't keep feeding him like this.' Minato looked up at the bottle, reached up for it and gave it to the baby again after wiping the sand off it 'He'll get sick to his stomach.'

He looked down at the sand in the floor, then at the group away from him. After ten seconds, when it became painfully clear that by 'we can gather more information' he had actually meant 'you go and gather', he let his shoulders sag.

'…your conception of teamwork leaves much to be desired.' he muttered resentfully, before biting his thumb and writing the symbol for 'truce' on the wall.

هدنة

'Let's talk.'

The one small eye opened just right above the sign, but it looked, more than anything, unhappy it was called out. Then it blinked once and the sign disappeared.

_No._

And the eye closed. Gaara twitched lightly and put the bottle in his mouth again. Minato held him closer and frowned thinking for a moment. He drew the symbol for 'host', coupled with 'Ghasbi' one of the new signs that he had been assigned to learn for this week by Wren. It was used in reference to unlawful possession of an object, but by connecting it to the symbol of Host, the meaning was clarified to mean reference to the young jinchuuriki. The blonde hesitated for a moment, hand poised to add something. After a moment hesitance he let it fall back down.

'Let's talk, Ichibi.'

Shukaku's eye opened again, this time visibly bent upside down. It seemed to be frowning and unfocused.

_What do you want, dirt._ it wrote on the wall with much more unfriendly scribbled writings than before. It was almost like if he had to do ten other things besides writing. Minato let out a displeased snort- oh, gee, what could he possibly want from the demon locked inside the little redhead's psyche? He wrote down the symbol for 'truth' and circles for emphasis.

'Nothing, baby just seems to have developed a sudden psychotic inclination for bulimia, just wondering if you didn't have anything to do with that,' he gave the monster a big, fake smile, before frowning. 'What are you doing to him? You are making him sick.'

The monster didn't answer at all. Only the word 'bulimia' got repeated with question mark for a few times. Then, as if the stovewas burning, the eye turned up, showing only black whites and stilling in this position.

'Allow me to illustrate.' the blonde said, pulling the baby in front of him as if it were some show-and-tell sort of contest 'This is your host. His stomach is this size-' he separated his fingers a few inches to further emphasize its smallness. 'In humans, that's where food goes to. And until it's empty again, any extra you make him swallow is not only going to be wasted, but it will make what little he did ate go bad so he'll be even sicker and able to eat even less. It will also physically hurt him.'

The eye slowly closed.

_Sick._ was what it left after. Gaara looked at it with unease as he slowly opened his mouth ajar to start intensively salivating. Minato looked at it, then down at the baby. The swollen gums seemed to have gone down a bit with the cool nipple, but Gaara didn't seem much more comfortable than before. He turned towards the small group surrounding the table.

'I have no idea what he's talking about.' he turned back to the wall. 'You *want* Gaara sick? I thought you didn't like him crying.'

In an answer the two angry eyes snapped open and glared right at Minato.

_Take off the seal._ it wrote. Then, very soon, the whole wall was covered with 'take it off's.

The blonde didn't flinch.

'What for?'

Gaara suddenly let out a squeal making it obvious he was tired of being ignored and threw the empty bottle right into the wall. It didn't bounce off; it just got stuck to it.

'Bubu!...' he cried. The expression on wall didn't change, only sentences started covering the floor and the ceiling. With all the deliberation in the world, Minato cradled the baby close and started stroking it's head gently.

'Tell me why do you want the seal off. Give me a good reason and we'll think about it.'

The wall slowly moved, covering the writings as the eyes kept on observing the pair of an adult and child.

_Danger._ he wrote simply _Blood._

And then again.

_Danger._

_Blood._

_Damage._

_Pain._

_Take it off take it off take it off…_

Blue eyes scanned the wall quickly, jumping over the shallow incisions made to create the words, over the walls and ceiling, then back at the baby.

'Shukaku…' he said after a few moments, eyes moving towards the gel lark had left on the table. 'You think Gaara's being hurt because – because he's teething? Because of what's growing in his mouth?'

_Take it off._

'Answer me.'

_DAMAGE_ it wrote in big bold letters as suddenly the saliva started to turn into diluted pinkish color. Both eyes closed and Gaara shifted in the hold, putting a fist in his mouth. The sand on the floor jerked harshly. Minato closed his eyes. So this was it. Of course Shukaku had attacked him. Even if he hadn't seen or felt him do anything bad at his precious host, Minato was the one holding him, the one closest. Obviously he'd be the prime suspect as to who was causing the child such discomfort. He brushed the scratches on his cheek absently for a moment, then walked to the table, sitting down before looking at the gel. Of course, it came in unmarked bottle. He didn't know how did such things work in other families, but medicine in ominous unmarked jars and bottles was defiantly encourage in this one. He had been here in long enough to at least know they were generally color coded and blue meant they were safe for consumption of even small creatures like Temari and Kankuro. He smeared some of the pale, greenish goo over one finger and did his best to smear it on the baby's gums.

'No one is damaging Gaara, Ichibi. He's just growing teeth, all humans do it, and it's bothersome. Overfeeding him won't make it go away.'

As an answer, Gaara clamped his jaws upon Minato's finger; if it wasn't for that he actually had no teeth yet, the blood would probably run free. Something in the wall moved like if it was alive and the sand on the floor jumped again in rage. The seal was burning off and as Gaara let out a shout at his gums being touched, a few grains did its best to stick to his pale skin. Maybe it wasn't, but logic didn't seem to be working with Shukaku. The bottle fell from the wall, but it rolled right up to Minato's legs where it got noticed by Gaara. Unbestknown to him, he reached for it with his best intents.

Minato opened his mouth but didn't really make any sound, air leaving him in a noiseless gasp. Fuck, it hurt. If anyone had told him this small, frailish infant had enough strength in his jaws for this, he wouldn't have believed it. He'd thought he'd be used to it already, what with Naruto thinking that anything and everything was for him to munch on, so more often than not he used his father as a chewing toy. He was lucky Gaara didn't have teeth like his own baby; otherwise he'd probably need stitches. It took a bit of struggling, but he finally managed to pull his finger out of the baby's mouth, inspecting for damage before the higher activity rate of the sand made him pull yet another seal.

'Stop that already.' the blonde said dispassionately. 'This baby is teething and you convincing him to go binge eating isn't going to make it go away.'

But Shukaku didn't stop. Gaara almost fell out of Minato's hold, wanting so desperately to get a hold on the object, his face showing that only focusing on the bottle was riding the need for crying away. Not far though, once the bottle was unobtainable, he immediately decided to show his unease to the world. It was never-ending circle. Daichi brushed his face like if it was covered in dust.

'Don't tell me this is going to be it for the closest month or two.'

'You know, I have enough with one baby whining about something I can't do anything about.' the blonde said softly, all pretense of respect lost. Not because he was particularly angry at the Kazekage, but because when it came down to it, he was as scared as desperate as the man. And because the man being able to wallow in that fright made him rather envious. Without knowing what else to do, Minato was reduced to something that felt bitterly enough like attempting to sweet-talk what was not only an inhuman aberration, but one mad as a hatter to booth.

هدنة

'Ichibi, Don't you like having your host well-taken care for?'

There was a stop on the wall and for a moment even Gaara gave up on the bottle, getting back to cuddling Minato along with actually trying to get under his shirt. Triangle shapes blinked on the wall and rose from it, making quite a nicely mouth upon he flat surface.

_I know how t__o take care of the host, human._

'Do, you really?' said human mocked, his tone downright acidic while he pulled the baby so he could hide his face against his shoulder. 'Do you know of human children, Ichibi? You must have seen more than one in your ridiculously long life. In case they all look the same to you, let me enlighten you- Gaara isn't. He's smaller than he should be. His whole development is shot to hell, he should have started teething several months ago. This is what having you does to him.'

Minato stroked the little body, ignoring how having Gaara this close made the still humid shirt stick to his skin in sticky splotches.

'You might be used to grown humans and pottery, but this baby is neither. Human children need care beyond you dragging mauled bodies-' he had to stop at that, because just remembering one of the first videos where he'd just stared for twenty minutes at the sand tearing a shinobi to bits and keep trying to drag them to Gaara made him sick. Well, maybe not the act itself, gruesome as it had been. Maybe it was the way the Kazekage had oh so casually clarified this was the monster attempting to feed the newborn.

'You don't know how to take care of a human child. If it weren't for your chakra this baby would be dead by now, but don't think this means he's safe. You can pour all the chakra you want on him for as long as it pleases you, but the first several years are important in human development, and your host can't even sit when he should be walking already. He can barely lift his upper body!' If that was a fault exclusive to Gaara, Minato didn't seem to have much of a problem shoving the fault onto the bijuu's shoulders. 'You have been pretty spoiled with the strongest shinobi in this country so far, Ichibi. Do you really want your current one to not even be able to walk on its own? Because if someone manages to get past you, just like before, your little human will be all on its own. And it won't be much help for your preservation if he's too weak to even lift a kunai.'

_You're just a vermin, human._ was written slowly. Under it, the small writing that could be described as _challenge_ also showed up. Shukaku indeed was cocky with inviting him to the fight after such talk, but that was also the way he lived. Gaara hiccupped under Minato's hands, coddled a bit. Then he slowly turned around and started looking at the bottle like if it slowly started getting covered in gold and happiness.

'Wuuu…'

'…You want a challenge?'

Minato put the baby down on the floor with all the care in the world, not that Gaara seemed to care or appreciate it, too immersed in his new obsession to even notice. He walked past the child to write something new underneath the monsters provocation, and this time, he didn't bother translating it to Sunnha, using instead the seals he'd been taught by his wife and family.

'屍鬼封尽'

Then he ripped the soiled shirt off himself, flinging it to the side. His torso gleamed lightly with swear, and was covered in small nicks and fading bruises from the occasional trouble the baby had given him, as well as old, faded scars. By far the largest one was on his side, where large burn marks almost blended with what not-too long ago must have been a massive wound. The blonde brushed a hand over his stomach in something that at any other moment might have been provocative, but the moment his skin made contact, chakra flashed lightly on the area, revealing the half-formed shape of the seal, interrupted halfway before he was able to finish performing it.

'…if this was enough for the Kyuubi to go down, do you think you will be any different? Fancy sealing or not, death is universal, and with this, yours would be permanent this time.'

The mouth on the wall closed and slowly drowned in itself.

_Don't be so cocky, vermin._ it wrote on the wall, but with the way the writing shook it could be visible that the monster was not exactly calm or so sure of itself anymore. The redhead looked up at Minato and broke into thin pitiful wail after the arms that didn't hold him anymore. People around just watched the scene, all senses sharp and ready to react. To some, death of the bijuu didn't sound so wrong anymore. Little number of them actually saw how it went wrong on the village's future, as the monster was their only hope to actually stand up and defend themselves from the rest of the cruel world. Daichi looked even further; would existing of Suna bring any good even after that? There was no guaranty that Shukaku wouldn't drown it just as he wanted to do it now. He remembered his effort and sacrifices he made for this, but if the things were to close right now…

…he couldn't bring himself to actually care all that much. They were all doomed anyway, no matter which path he led them (or even if he didn't try to lead them at all). And if Shukaku were to die, would death of the Fourth Hokage be any of the real waste? Sure, he wanted to get laid. Sure, it was a nice body and a nice personality – as much as sarcastic the blonde man was for the most of the time, he surely knew how to take care of the kids and that was a nice add to the side of his in eyes of someone who didn't know how to take care of emotional needs of his own children at all. But then, he was the Hokage – exiled or not, he was still the advantage of the other village over them and their massive weapon turned on us with trigger on. If he were to die, the threat would also vanish. And he didn't really believe that Konoha would leave them alone, with or without him. What they did to Amegakure was loud in the private circles and couldn't get unnoticed by him if he wanted to get along within politics. Nobody was clear. Everyone bore sins. And thus, nobody and at no time given was safe.

So, in the end, he didn't stop anyone and didn't command anyone from stopping anything. For once it was good to stand behind and not in front of the line, looking deep into the loaded gun. The bottle tripped and laid on the floor, unnoticed.

Gaara wasn't happy with that. No, Gaara wasn't happy with anything so far. His stomach hurt, his internal insides hurt all over and he felt unwell with how milk went back and forth his mouth for the reasons he couldn't understand. He felt tormented by the pressure from inside his brain and body enough and now the big safe and warm man left him on the floor just like that and went to do something else, who knows if not forever. What's more, something was blocking his third pair of limbs and he couldn't search for him nor even catch him to bring him closer. He felt so helpless. And he hated it.

'Uwaaaah!' he said, voicing his uneasiness out loud and feeling how the monster inside him trashed, angry at how Minato answered and what he was about to do out of sudden. He felt murderous intent and he hated it, but what could he do? His neck burned and blocked him. And then another sort of unhappiness hit him as his gum just started giving too much pressure and dribbled with blood again. Stop that. Everyone, stop that. He just wanted to feel warm like before. Floor was so empty and lonely after all.

And there was nothing he could do. Again. He cried to the wall. Again.

Minato didn't move from the place, watching the monster's last message and waiting for anything else to come, but it seemed like the beast had finally had enough. The skin of his stomach stung like an infected wound, a friendly reminded about how the Death God didn't appreciate things done halfway. And it would have been a lot more unpleasant if it hadn't been because he stopped there and then. He wished he had gone through it, still. Even if it had meant to be locked forever in whatever hell the nine-tails resides now, at least he wouldn't have to be here, making the mistakes he was doing, feeling like if every door that opened for him was a dead end. A string of bad decisions one after the other, and not so much as a glimmer of hope things would get better.

He wondered if this is what Sakumo had felt like, while he kneeled in the tea room with the sharpened tantō next to him.

'…you'll have to give us time.' he said finally, the words neither request nor demand, just a plain statement. 'It will pass eventually, and I'll take care of him. That's all I- all anyone here can do, and that includes you, Shukaku.'

Gaara was still on the floor, no difference with how he had left him except he was now on his back and squalling up to the ceiling, little limbs flailing in an effort to call attention. The baby wasn't even strong enough to lift himself by his own means. Minato leaned down to pick the child, wincing lightly when the action made the skin in his stomach bend, aggravating the pain to a slow burning. He joined the rest of the group at the table, feeling everyone's eyes on him, feeling the monster's frustration and bloothirst- and not meeting either. He had to keep this baby alive, had to keep the monster from taking over, had to make sure these people he was learning to appreciate didn't die needlessly. Gods, he had to keep Naruto safe. And as Kushina had kindly remained him- you needed to be alive to be able to protect anything.

'…I need a new shirt.'

Wordlessly, one of the ANBUs stripped from his grey vest and handed it to him. Gaara slowly calmed down in his hold as he turned around to glance at the group and then back, to hide inside Minato's wet shirt. Daichi slowly let out the held breath. So it was not going to end up in bloodbath after all.

'…yeah, make me feel bad about it, why don't you…' the blonde complained, but he still gave Lark a light, tired smile before figuring a way to put the shirt on with Gaara still bodily attached to the remaining fishnet. Then he practically slumped on the chair as if his body had lost all will to hold him upright.

'All right my ANBU friends… And Kazekage.' he added as an afterthought, seeing that the man was still in place, surprisingly enough. 'This baby is teething, and it's not going to be pretty for any of us. But we are going to deal with it the best we can.'

The blonde took a deep breath, straightening a bit again on his seat and crossing his legs while he shifted Gaara a little higher so his legs wouldn't brush the tenderized skin on his stomach. Then he turned to the older redhead.

'You might want to get your other kids somewhere else until we can figure out some safe way to deal with all of this. Even if they don't seem to register in the sand's radar yet, I don't want it to decide to start now.'

Daichi slowly rose up from his chair.

'Fine, I will tell Yashamaru to not come back home.' he said as he unfolded his quite crumpled clothes now 'And I will move my kids under his care. Nothing new he wouldn't be able to deal with… you. 'The stretched finger pointed at the Wren 'You take them there. Then come back. We shall all assist with this crisis situation. The mission will be over once I say it is, not earlier. Mobilize the rest to be ready for eventual uproars on your way back.'

The Wren bowed and vanished.

'Your kids in my house…?' Minato didn't sound especially thrilled about the idea, and maybe a few weeks ago he would have protested long and hard about it, but by now he was so drained he just made a vaguely complaining sound. It kind of made sense, and with the kids there, Yashamaru couldn't do anything too terrible to Naruto, right? 'If they break something, you are paying for it. And your kids better not eat mine, or I'll feed them to my toads.' the stopped to wipe Gaara's chin.

'What are you talking about, you live in my property.' said Daichi with voice raised up enough for everyone to hear 'Whatever they break is mine and thus it's my loss, not yours. I decide if it's worth paying for the loss or not. Besides…'

Black pupils turned to Gaara. The redhead didn't look back, only sniffed loudly by his nostrils.

'…my kids are well behaved, unlike this monster you hold in your hands. They might be frivolous but they won't cause any serious harm. Worry not.'

Minato looked down at said 'monster'. It was currently clinging to him like an abused puppy, but he wasn't going to start this discussion with the redhead again.

'Maybe, but some of the things there are from my family, so I'd rather not have them broken. They aren't exactly replaceable.' Most didn't get done anymore, or the places they had been done with had ceased to exist awhile ago. Even so, he didn't worry too much. Now that Naruto was crawling, he had baby-proofed the residence to the best of his capabilities, and most of the really important things were kept by his summons or in scrolls. He didn't think he had anything that he would mourn too badly if broken. By far his most important possession was the necklace he usually wore and it had shown remarkable resilience to a very lively (and a not so much one) baby, so he thought it would handle it.

'Back to topic, I'd rather keep the number of ANBU in immediate surrounding down to just the usual ones-' that meant Thorny Devil, Lark, Vulture and Wren- 'If you want to leave the rest around, you can do that, and maybe keep the ants outside and ready to mark perimeter at signal, but I don't want them close enough the baby will see or sense them. He's going to be stressed enough as it is.'

'I can do that, if that's important. But don't think I will hold missing of any of your limbs responsible in such case.'

'It is important because whenever new people appear Gaara gets scared. He already knows me and the group and how they work, and he hasn't tried to do any lasting damage these past weeks, so I want to think he's getting used to it. If we add more people he's more likely to attack anything on sight.'

And to be truthful, not all of the redhead's ANBU could hide their contempt for the baby too well. Or for Minato, for taking him out of the cellar.

'In the meantime, we'll have to hold until Mikoto-san answers.' There didn't seem to be any way around this. He looked down at Gaara, frowning. '…if he's teething, does that mean we can start giving him other things to drink besides milk?'

'That's usually how it goes. However I don't think this is a good idea.' Because to be fair, chewing on things had to brush against the teeth and if Gaara was going to feel any more pain than he already had… he just didn't want to think about it. 'Just keep him with milk, he seems to be inclined to It anyway.'

'If you say so…' though the truth was that after today Minato didn't think his already lacking affection for donkey's milk would get any better. 'I'm just saying because Naruto already was teething as well-' he just wasn't going to specify when he'd started '…and after that he started biting on everything, even if it hurt. But food seemed to distract him, and the cold bottle seems to make Gaara better.'

And truth was, this was a baby that didn't sleep. Ever. It was a baby that had twenty four hours to either entertain himself or spend feeling his paints. The more they distracted him the better. Daichi gave him 'the look' and sighed.

'Fine, I can prepare something-' he said as he started getting up.

'No need, no need, I will do it, Kazekage-sama!' piped the Thorny Devil immediately and almost forced the man onto the chair 'We can't have a man cooking while woman is in the room! Take care!'

And she had ran out of the room. Daichi looked after her.

'…at least she knows her place.'

Men nodded, but it was obvious the way their shoulders shook they were barely containing laughter. Or fear. Possibly both. When Diachi looked back at them, they stopped. Gaara yawned in the hold and slowly shifted around to look at the room. When his gaze fell on the bottle of milk, however, his senses immediately sharpened.

'Ah…' he mumbled and reached out his hand toward it 'Uwah!...'

Minato broke out of wondering if Suna was really a Mecca of sexism or if maybe if the man was just a terrible cook when the baby shifted. What he had seen just now was so out of character for Devil that he had no doubt her teammates would be teasing her for it endlessly late, but he'd have to wonder about such vague things later, because he had an overexcited package to tend to now.

'Oh no, young man, not again.' he said, turning Gaara around so he was sideways on his lap and giving his back to the bottle. 'You just ruined two shirts in a row and I'm not losing this one, understood?'

Gaara obviously didn't understand. He shifted in the hold and tried his best to peek out from the hold to look at the object and did twice as much to reach for it, despite the obvious distance.

'You want to go down? Fine.' Minato had no idea how long it had been, so he played safe and applied another seal on the baby's neck. Then he made a show of very slowly going through the motions to leave him on the floor on his own. 'But this time you stay down.'

Green eyes looked up at him with confusion, but the little redhead didn't protest much about being put on the floor. More, he seemed to be even happy as he was put closer to the bottle and made a few, very miserable, but indeed effortful tries at crawling closer to it. Only after he was maybe ten centimeters closer to it, something clicked in his mind as he looked up and actually noticed, that cold floor he was on didn't really equal Minato's hands and that he was left alone all on his own again.

The loud crying followed. Blonde rose his eyebrows faintly.

'See?' he extended his hands as if to pick the baby, but didn't actually lean down to reach for him. 'You can have me or the bottle, but not both right now. Pick one.'

Gaara didn't have to be told twice. Immediately he rolled onto his back, then onto his belly again, until he was facing Minato and desperately tried to shift closer, all the time giving off a very loud and desperate cry, marked with a trail of snot and tears on the floor.

'…woah, did you actually understand that?' the blonde asked, rather surprised by the baby's quick reaction to his words. He immediately picked up the baby and tried to soothe him, using the what was left of the bib after all this drooling (though if that cleaned anything or just made a bigger mess would be an acceptable debate) and pressed his forehead lightly against the child's.

'Are we actually developing some level of communication?' he cooed affectionately, trying to get the baby calmed down again 'Give me a sign, Little Red. Bottles have been officially banished of the 'accepted-as-sign' league.'

Gaara's only response was cease of crying as he cuddled up to the warm hug of safe arms. It seemed like if Minato was truly all he needed, no matter what his inside urges told him. Thorny Devil decided to come in a few seconds after that with a plate full of very liquefied milky broth mixed with grains and a small glass filled with broth based on something that smelled strongly off goat's meat. The baby rose his eyes slightly to that, but without letting go of Minato.

Minato thanked her quietly, taking a moment to both let the baby calm back down and make sure what had been brought would be softened enough. It all seemed too much, especially now Gaara had just been sick, but that didn't mean he couldn't at least test try if he'd be willing to give new food a try. When he was sure the baby had finally finished his remarkably easily solved drama, he reached for one of the things floating in the milk. He grabbed at it with fingers, momentarily ignoring the spoon, and was pleased when the thing practically disintegrated when he tried to squish it.

Picking another, he carefully brought it closer, stopping short of the baby's face to let him have a go at inspecting it.

'Here, Little Red. I'm assuming this is edible, so have a try.'

Gaara slowly rose his head toward the fingers, obviously his interest picked by the new thing. However, before he did anything, he simply sent the fingers a dangerous glare as he kept sniffing the air in very animalistic pattern. Then, very slowly, he descended upon them and tried to suck the thing off. It pleased him enough to take everything in his mouth… and to start spitting the grains. Obviously the milk ingredient played big role here, but solids did not.

The sniffing Minato had expected. Like Naruto, Gaara tended to give everything a good and thorough sniff before shoving it in his mouth. Some days he wanted to tell himself that meant he wouldn't have to bother too much about the kids accidentally eating poison, only neither Naruto nor Gaara seemed to understand things such as raw ink weren't edible. In the end he was forced to admit they probably didn't really care and just liked admiring new scents.

Even so, Gaara generally was enthusiastic as any other kid with shoving things into his mouth and thoroughly munching and drooling on it. He wasn't very surprised when Gaara was agreeable enough to slurp his fingers into his mouth. He was, however, not expecting him to spit the softened grains right back out. For a moment he stared at the way the tiny brown specks accumulated on the baby's lips in drooly chunks. Then he started laughing, shaking the baby lightly while he tried to surpass the shaking of his shoulders.

'Oh, Little Red.' the blonde chuckled after a moment. 'Surely it can't be that bad? I know Thorny Devil did it-' The girl looked at them and sighed, obviously feeling defeated on cooking field '-but I'm sure she tried very hard! Let me see."

For a moment he contemplated what was by now pooling at the little redhead's chin, before shaking his head in negative. He fished a few grains with his finger again, and slowly gave them a try. They… weren't that bad, actually. He had no idea what exactly *what* they were, the tiny granules looking nothing like the cereal he usually let Naruto have, but they were soft and had a vague sort of almost-not-like almond aftertaste.

'See, not that bad?' he said, licking the few ones left on his fingers with all the parsimony of a six-year-old. He then picked a few more and offered them again to the little redhead. 'Go on.'

Gaara looked at Minato with a light awareness as he leaned down to suck the thing from his fingers… and to spit the grains all back again. He however, seemed to get more excited about it as he flailed toward the plate with a very similar gesture he did toward the bottle before. The Lord Emperor was pleased. Thorny Devil observed it in silence and didn't dare to let a single expression slip, even if Lark nearby her was about to burst into a roaring laughter right in front of his Kazekage. Daichi noticed that but ignored it, as for now. He didn't know what was so funny, but he could let this slip, as long as the man succeeded into looking like if he didn't do a bad thing.

Minato chuckled again and kept finger feeding him bits of the food, figuring at this pace the milk wouldn't hurt the baby too badly or make him sick, and that or sure at least one or two of the grains would eventually make it down the baby's gullet.

Gaara obediently played with Minato until everything he had to swallow was swallowed and until everything he wanted to spit out… was, well, spat out. Some of the grains indeed flowed right to Gaara's stomach but it got no reaction from him. Maybe if Minato could look closer or more inside he'd notice how Shukaku actually stopped around his own paranoia and began inspecting the grains as new objects that had to be built into the walls of the toddler and had no idea how to do it. But what was not seen…

'Awuu…' murmured Gaara laying satisfied against Minato after the long calming play. His hardened belly also deflated a bit and he felt more comfort. This man was the best after all. Minato was more than satisfied. Sure, most of the food went right past Gaara's chin, and maybe he had managed to get down half a tiny coffee mug of both liquids and grains, but he hadn't expected Gaara to eat much, and his sudden and unnatural obsession with milk seemed to have died of natural causes, hopefully permanently. He also didn't want to overfeed him in case Gaara didn't respond well to the milk, watered down as it was, but at least it had gone well as a test trial. Maybe he could give the child a few spoonfuls of tea later in the night, to settle his stomach.

The sand had also seemed to momentarily calm down, stopping its frustrated slithering over the floor. For the moment everything was fine. Maybe they would be able to do this after all.


	15. Fifteenth

It was amazing what fifty hours of uninterrupted fussy, needy and ridiculously powered baby could do for one's optimism. It wasn't that Gaara misbehaved, he was still a calm and rather sweet baby… so long as things were done his way, and his way was particularly hard to cater to. The Kazekage had told him that teething children occasionally became feverish when they began teething, but even if Minato had kept constant check on Gaara's' temperature, it didn't climb at any range that could be noticeable at simple skin test. What the redhead didn't tell him was a radical increase in both Gaara's levels of stubbornness and clinginess, but he had spent enough with his own son to know those were normal.

The only difference was how Naruto wasn't able to control sand and thus couldn't rub him raw to physically show his discontent.

It wouldn't have been too bad if Gaara could talk and maybe say what he wanted, but despite much asking, pleading and attempts at bribing, Gaara refused to produce anything besides the dozen or so of noises he usually did -and since he used the same for 'oh, I want that' to 'this diaper is chafing me' and 'stay away or I'll eat your hand', one could hardly consider them sufficient warning. Minato tried to get him to learn to say his name, but the baby had apparently inherited a hidden sadistic vein from his uncle, because he remained cute, clingy and utterly silent.

The good news was that he had started to eat semi-solids and he seemed to like the cereal Thorny Devil carefully prepared, so long as they were utterly soaked in copious amounts of milk. Minato also kept having to finger feed him because it was easier to aim for the toddlers mouth with them than with a spoon. Gaara tended to clamp down on this one, and given how swollen his gums occasionally became that had gone as good as expected (on a brighter note, it *was* easier to keep surveillance on both kitchen and living room was made much easier with the torn down wall and all).

Minato stopped having time for study, time for look at what was left of the videos on jinchuuriki's behavior and he hadn't been surprised or too upset the day he went to look for a piece of paper to make new seals and found Wren had taken everything he had accumulated over the past month and taken it somewhere else. Some of those scrolls were important and it was better to keep them away from a toddler who had decided the only way to deal with his issues was regularly play 'flood the house with sand and see how long it takes for people to fish the furniture back out'.

It wouldn't have been so bad if it weren't because Gaara had gone right back to his previous levels of aggression. In general, Minato's plan to keep people out of the child's way had worked, Gaara occasionally stared at the ANBU but ever since Minato had became a permanent addition he had stopped most threats against their person besides the occasional shove. If they stayed in their side and didn't try to get between him and Minato, he had seemed willing enough to overlook their intrusion.

The problem was that when Gaara accidentally bit down on something at the wrong moment it hurt, and when the host felt pain, the jinchuuriki's famed (and rather stupid) absolute defense looked around for someone to blame for it. And when it found none, it settled for attacking whatever was closest. That meant Minato had come rather accustomed to have the sand slap him around, but given how the baby *was* constantly in his arms, Gaara seemed to usually be aware enough to stop it before anything too permanent happened. Said preference didn't extend to the masked bodyguards, and so they could provably count themselves lucky all Lark had gone through was severe abrasions and an arm joint pulled out of place. Minato had taken the chance of the Kazekage being holed in his office to ask him if he'd rather step out from duty until things went back to normal.

'He will be fine.' muttered Lark quietly as Gaara stared in some other direction 'Please, proceed in being a caretaker.'

If it had been up to them they would have left the baby constantly locked on restraining seals, but Minato tried to use them as little as possible. Whenever he use them it only seemed to agitate the baby (or the sand, or both) all the more. And so much messing with the way Gaara's chakra path as arranged was bound to cause some problems on the long run- either the monster would eventually figure out a way to circumvent the block or Gaara's own body would adapt with alternate chakra paths, and he didn't know enough about medicine to know for sure this wouldn't affect how his human chakra worked.

He supposed this was one of the things he would eventually have to ask the famed Aakasuna Chiyo, but so far there had been no opportunity for him to so much as ask the redhead's father about it. When it came down to it, they really didn't have any other option but to rely in the aggressive methods they had enforced so far. Minato did have several new designs to use, and Wren had been looking at them over with the Kazekage- stronger seals, in case the ones they currently had would stop working- but there hadn't been time to test them either, and an irritable, aggressive Gaara wasn't the best moment to give it a try. So far he'd dealt with the baby's moods by teleporting from one room to the one furthest from where the inhabitants of the house were, and this worked well so long as he knew exactly where everyone was at all times. Suddenly taking care of the baby seemed an awful lot like protecting the kage tower in the middle of an hostile takeover.

By the time Mikoto's letter finally arrived, it was hard to say who was more battered from them all. In fact, just the previous days he had finally broken down and despite much hesitation written a letter to his family. Said break had been somewhat literal- the ex-Hokage had finally managed to put Gaara down for a moment so he could stretch his limbs, the baby had stuck one little fist in its mouth and chewed the wrong way and Wren had gotten in the room practically at the same time. It went downhill from there, and now the blonde was nursing two fractured ribs when he'd showed the younger man out of the way.

And it was no joke whatsoever, Wren had to immediately go to hospital wing to be treated with small injuries at vital points. Gaara calmed down enough after that to not become threatening more to anyone, but he was still in fishy mood. After a moment he once again demanded for his meal which had to contain milk, otherwise he'd get fussy (and at this state it meant dangerous fit, including walls breaking; baby seemed to be tired at this all too, and thus the seals started to become weakening at how anger went on and on for longer periods of time). Others simply tried to look like if it didn't bother them, or maybe they didn't really care anymore. At least Daichi was so used to such things already he barely blinked when another piece of furniture went to pieces. He learned to not hold value to objects.

Minato took this all with the zen equanimity of a war general who was used to getting close and physical when things weren't going according to plan.

Unfortunately he couldn't literally get close and physical to anyone but the baby –who he couldn't exactly treat like he treated his soldiers, and he couldn't even train to beat all the accumulated frustration out. Meaning that despite his best efforts to be pleasant, being near to him for extended periods of time generally meant to willingly expose oneself to radioactive levels of sarcasm. It was just too many things piling up one after the other, and even if the baby was a welcome (if rather masochistic) excuse to stay away from the real world, two months was more than enough for anyone, and that included Minato.

He was tired of living in this house and dedicating himself day and night to make sure the baby didn't grow too upset and that he had everything he could need; not to mention that his supposed 'free time' was filled up with learning a language that had died before the first settlers of the region had had the brilliant idea of starting a village in the middle of this living furnace. He had the feeling that if he didn't go out soon he'd go brilliantly mad sometime soon.

The only distraction he had had was when he made a clone to go look after Naruto for a little time, and it generally was a very quick thing. It was normal for shinobi parents to absent themselves for long periods of time- Sakumo had done it all the time, and Kakashi hadn't loved him any less for not giving sign of life for months on the go… but what if Naruto did?

Besides, Sakumo left his son with a certified babysitter and later on, occasionally with Minato. His baby was with Yashamaru, and that everyone told him the man was a saint who deserved to be carried off in a beam of light made from holiness and purity didn't really make him any less paranoid. And even if Yashamaru really ended up the saint patron of babysitterhood and pediatrician mednin-ness rolled up in somewhat feminine aprons, what if Naruto forgot about him? His son wasn't very old, just barely around seven months now, and the last two he had maybe seen his father (or more accurately, his father's clones) maybe seven times, and all of them for barely over half an hour, if lucky. By now Yashamaru had accumulated more time with him in less than a week than Minato in the past

The only reason he didn't lose sleep agonizing over this was because wasn't sleeping, just like everyone else in the house. Even if it hadn't just been safer to be awake all the time, the pent up aggressively exuding from the walls themselves would have unsettled any shinobi too much to allow them to relax and take a deserved rest. The heat was insufferable, to the locals air conditioner was a mythological creature rumored to appear on the nights without moon when hyenas gave birth to two headed babies and Gaara had broken the refrigerator after it had personally offended him for being in its usual corner and doing the same it did every day.

Detachedly, Minato started fantasizing about giving the baby a good, nice shake. Not because he wanted to hurt Gaara (and the reason he hand's given this idea a try yet was exactly this and how sick just imagining the way the little body would flail made him feel), but because he knew what would happen if he did. And it just didn't sound bad anymore. At all.

In the end he did his best to be keep calm and swallow all this frustration, but after what could only be described as 'the teething siege', Minato was ready to start chewing on walls just to let some of this pent up anger go. And as bad as all the forced remaining in the house might be with children, it didn't take a genius to figure out that a tense Minato didn't do wonders of the moods of a stressed baby. And to make matters worse the Kazekage had tied the binding on his ribs too tight again.

'….you are doing it on purpose.' the blonde accused sullenly as the redhead mercilessly tightened the strips of fabric around his chest.

'Yes, I am.' stated Daichi dully, not really looking out if the tightened knot cut off the circulation around the area or not 'So you wouldn't fall asleep. Pain is our friend against such traitorous weakness.'

And with that, he made sure to actually press shortly against the fracture, hard enough to reawaken the pain in it anew. He gave a brief look at the baby who was once again seeming to be fussy, but calmed down enough, sucking on something that could be considered a 'glue' made out of milk and fiber as he hardly got convinced by anything that didn't contain at least 50% in milk and was soaking wet. Baby looked back but it didn't spare him his interest, just continued sucking.

The blonde let out a surprised grunt, back straightening in response to the sharp sting of pain as his body automatically tried to find a better way to arrange itself so the strain on the bruised ribs wouldn't be so bad. It seemed he wouldn't have problems with slouching any time soon.

'…I have better self preservation than that.'

Before this all, Gaara didn't seem to mind too much when Minato slept. Sure, he did his baby-level best to stick his fingers in odd places and certainly didn't have much consideration about remaining in silence, but all of this was annoyance at normal human baby level, no sand included. So long as he was next to him, Gaara could wait the couple hours Minato's naps usually took. Now… not so much.

If he was in the right mood, he could entertain himself for an hour or two. More often than not, he'd switch from sucking at his fingers to randomly attacking whoever was closest, so if Minato was back to subsisting on soldier pills and syrup-y coffee, no one thought of complain about how he ruined the flavor anymore. He carefully turned around a little so he could glare at the older redhead, once more wishing he'd just go away. That way he could just concentrate on hating him, because it sure was easier to blame everything on people you hated.

As miserable as he felt, he knew his companions weren't doing much better (in fact, he kept wondering if the ANBU trio even had homes to go back to, because when they weren't there, they usually were collapsing somewhere close); but what surprised him was that the Kazekage was generally there as well. It might not be the 24/7 companionship of the other three, but unlike them, the man did have a sinking village to try and keep afloat, and yet it seemed that every time he turned around, Kazekage was there. No one had asked him to, and for sure anyone else would have been able to be treating Minato's wounds (the massive bruise across his side would have been very appreciative of this) and yet he was there all the same.

This was something he had noticed before in the security tapes, how whenever things seemed to get truly rough with the young jinchuuriki, it was generally the redhead who had to step up to stop him. It was probably the only reason the man had ANBU left to run until dry. And Minato didn't need to be a master at interrogation to notice how the masked nin with him seemed to relax minutely whenever Kazekage got back home. Trust had to be built there, somewhere, under who knows how many centuries of what might as well be plainly called slavery. In short, Minato wished the man could be a bastard all the time instead of having redeemable qualities. It seemed like if no Sunanin ever went easy on him on this matter. Daichi noticed the glare, but didn't return it. However, he did stare back.

'I will accept your thanks whenever you're ready to utter them in the future.' he said and let go of the bandages. 'Keep an eye on the birdy.'

'Thank you.' Minato said with no hint of sarcasm, if nothing else just in hoped it would disappoint the man. He obligingly looked at Gaara, who- if he wasn't mistaken- was giving him a reproachful look as If asking how he dared pay attention to someone else when he was right there to be fawned upon.

'Excuse me little man, but who exactly did this to me?' he asked the baby, wiping a bit off his chin before gathering more of the gooey goop in the plate and offering it to him. 'Don't complain, if you don't want me to need medical treatment, stop attacking everyone on sight.'

Gaara didn't answer, only swallowed another spoonful of the milky goop, breathing heavily through his nose. It was irritating his mouth overall, but from some time there was something off going on and he couldn't see what it really was; this also didn't make him any more happier or easy going on if to panic or get angry. Daichi observed him a little, then looked back at Minato, who, surprisingly, dropped off the snarky attitude.

'You're welcome.' he said and he left, not without leaving one simple brush of the hand against Minato's shoulder. In Suna this was already envisioned as sexual harassment when it happened between the people of different sex, but from what the ex-hokage did he was starting to see the man had little to no idea how prude Suna could be in comparison to quite whorish Konoha. And that meant he could try with so much more things. Interesting.

Minato gave the man a weak nod and tried to lean back a little- only for the bandages to tighten again. Casual touching was nothing new to him, be it between man or women. If he had more time to spare he might have noticed the Kazekage didn't seem to care too much about breaking his personal sphere when everyone else did their best to remain even further than the norm. Unfortunately, all his dedication was catered to the bundle of joy and murderous sand he currently had gathered at his lap. It was later in the afternoon when a strangely silent Roadrunner came to drop a letter from Konoha, which was surprising because he hadn't seen him for almost a full week now. His mask looked brand new as well, but when Minato asked if he was all right the man only nodded curtly. If he noticed how Thorny Devil looked away at this he made no comment about it, instead taking the letter.

It was unopened, which surprised him. Either Sunagakure had decided they suddenly respected their mail or they were afraid it was a bomb. Or maybe they wanted him to open it, which was utterly ridiculous. At any rate he was surprised it was even there to begin with- given how long it had taken to arrive, he had just assumed it had never reached Fuu's wife or that she had simply chosen not to respond. He turned it over to the gathered ANBu while he shifted the baby into a more comfortable position.

'Who wants to read it first?'

Daichi had only waved hand at him.

'Stop being so formal, you've been living here for past two weeks.' he muttered in careless tone 'Just read it out loud so everyone could hear it right…'

'Lack of formality?' the blonde said as he tore the letter open and passed the baby the bit he wasn't using in case it managed to hold his attention for the next five seconds and a half 'You could start by telling your ANBU I have a name and I won't kill them for using it.'

So, the man being nice by letting him read the letter was negated by the man obviously not trusting him enough to read it on his own. On the other hand, he could have taken it to some specialist to make sure it wasn't coded with secret messages or scent before giving it to him, so he couldn't really complain. He pulled out the letter, and when there was something left inside the envelop, he cautiously turned it upside down on the table. A small object in a plastic wrapper landed on it with light clutter, and he pulled it away from the curious sand tendrils to inspect it, before giving it a bright smile.

Kushina had been right about Fuu's love all along. She really was as smart as she was kind and lovely. In fact, he'd probably propose to her right now… if only polygamy were accepted in Fire country. And if he could be in Fire country, while at that.

Then again…

'Here.' he handed the Kazekage the small toy. 'You should probably have it tested before we give it a try.'

He wanted to trust Kushina's best friend and the wife of his close friend. He really did. But for sure, he didn't trust the council, and he didn't trust his enemies, and just in case… Because if people thought this was supposed to go to Naruto, it was better to be safe than sorry. He wasn't risking the cutest kidnapper in the world over his village's hatred.

The Kazekage took it with a light frown, inspecting the shape and structure with hands. He had never seen something like this in his life so he didn't know how to treat it, but so far no strange seal could be detected. He only didn't like one word, and it was 'freezing'. It didn't feel very cold and that meant it had to probably use a lot of electricity or batteries to start to become 'freezing'. Which he was not sparing for such stupidities.

'...For poison.' the blonde clarified, shaking the envelope one last time just in case some new miracle decided to pop out of it. Daichi looked up at the blonde with a light surprise, then flicked his fingers at Roadrunner.

'Lick it.' The man obeyed without a word. When after five seconds he didn't fall down flat on earth, Daichi threw the toy back at Minato. 'It's clear.'

'You are a horrible human being.' the blonde said blankly. He caught the toy and threw it at Lark, who was closest to the kitchen. 'Either put it on the freezer or go see if Wren is up for some quick freezing, please.'

Daichi had only looked at Minato like if nothing was standing there.

'It's not like anyone would miss him if it was poisoned, so why not make use of this.' he muttered nonchalantly and thundered the Lark with the coldest glare yet. Lark slowly put the toy in his pocket. No fridge then.

'I will look for the Wren.' he said quietly and hesitated '…if I can.'

As Daichi didn't say anything, he eventually retreated.

'I would miss him.' Minato replied just as lightly 'He's a good soldier, works well in a team and I like him.'

The redhead only decided to look at the side, where Roadrunner still stood, quiet and, as it seemed, uncaring about what was talked around the room.

'Maybe you want to adopt him then.'

'Isn't he a little old to be adopted?' the blonde said, finally breaking into a small smile. 'I'd ask him out, but Gaara seems to think I'm taken.'

Daichi flinched slightly at that.

'Not as a kid.' he muttered. What an unfunny thought, the man was obviously past the age of adolescence by now and it was showing 'But as a personal bitch. After all you like him.'

Roadrunner slightly moved his head to the side, his interest obviously piqued now. Minato looked at the Roadrunner mask for a moment, before his eyes moved back towards the Kazekage.

'Well, for starters, I wouldn't call him a 'bitch'.' Was it just him or it seemed like if today the redhead really had it for the taller ANBU? 'Especially if I like him.'

'It's your choice. I tend to call things and people by their rightful names. Or…' his eyes didn't leave the ANBU for a minute, but the man seemed to bend a little more forward with that '…are you still able to work as a bitch right now?'

'No, Kazekage-sama.' said the ANBU clearly. 'For that I'd need my better features.'

'My bad.' said Daichi and finally got back to looking at Minato 'I guess then a personal servant is enough.'

'Well, I do like to be pampered every now and then…' the blonde mused, though he didn't really mean it. Well, it was sort of truth, he just wouldn't have said it seriously in such an easy manner. In truth the Kazekage was again making a brilliant work out of annoying him and making him want to be as antagonistic as possible. And he'd like nothing more than to indulge into this, if it weren't because he didn't want the other man to have problems with his boss, who made him test child toys for poison.

_Dear Minato-sama_

_I am writing in response to your recent letter, and I'd like to start by thanking you most sincerely for trusting me in such a delicate matter. I confess I've wanted to hear more from Naruto-kun, and yourself as well, but I wasn't sure if it would be appropriate if me to contact you on my own. I would also like to apologize for replying in such a late fashion. _

_On regards of Naruto-kun's problems teething, my one advice would be to take it as calmly as possible. If it's any consolation, Sasuke is also starting his own and Fugaku is besides himself when he starts up- strangely enough, the only thing that seems to work is when Itachi sings to him, so I guess it's a matter of finding the one thing that does work. With Itachi, it was frozen apple slices, but I don't suppose you will find them easily over there. In replacement, I'm sending you this teething toy, I've found it to be rather effective if the pain isn't too bad._

_I don't know what sorts of foods you are giving Naruto-kun right now, so if you could specify I might be able to help you a bit on the matter. Sasuke seems to like anything that requires chewing, but Itachi was rather sensitive at that age. Generally I settle him by placing some crushed melon in a hankychief, then secure it with a knot. If it's a bit frozen it works even better, so perhaps you could try it with honey._

_Another thing that seems to work is to put a bit of chamomile extract on his water, just two or three drops a bottle will do. That should work to keep him calmed for longer and get him sleep- _

'Oh uh… yeah, we are not doing that-' he scanned through the rest of the letter, sighing a little.

_Other than that, I don't know what else to tell you, it really depends on what sort of foods and medicine there are available, maybe you should ask a local? They might be of more help than me._

Minato was proud of himself when he refrained from making any comments on the matter, continuing as he sped up a little on the delivery.

_Itachi is getting taller and more like Fugaku every day, and teachers from the academy have already been hinting they'd like for him to start more advanced classes, and to__ tell the truth I'm not sure if to be proud or worried, perhaps a bit of the two would be acceptable? Sasuke is getting bigger by the day._

_I wanted to let you know I've been taking care of K-_

At this point he stopped, eyes following the rest of the sentence quickly before drawing away. He didn't toss the letter; he practically slapped it on the table so the text was facing down.

'I don't want to read anymore.' he informed laconically, seeming to address everyone in the room and no one in particular at the same time. That said, he suddenly got up and disappeared into the kitchen. Daichi immediately flicked fingers at Thorny Devil.

'You.' he muttered 'Bring it to me.'

The girl complied. There wasn't much left to share now, just a few more paragraphs, and none of them were precisely long.

_I wanted to let you know I've been taking care of Kushina's grave in your place. I think Hatake-kun does as well, I see him at the cemetery every now and then and I occasionally find offerings which I haven't left myself. In case you wonder, he seems to be doing fine, though I will admit I don't see him that often._

_If there is anything else I can help you with in this matter, please let me know. I would also like to ask if you could send me some pictures of Naruto-kun? I dearly hope not to appear out of place, but I'm really quite curious- and hopeful. _

_I will understand if you'd rather not, however, so please don't concern yourself too much on this matter. _

_I hope you are doing fine, Minato-sama. We all do._

_I look forward to hearing from you both again._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Uchiha Mikoto_

Daichi slowly folded the letter back into tight square of paper. What were the odds, Uchiha was taking care of descendants of Senju – or what was left of them. It wasn't even funny. But then, it was not his matter so why should he really bother? He had his own problems here.

'What are you looking at? Go, take care of the brat.' he muttered as he pointed at the kitchen door. The soldiers complied as well.

'Hey.' the blonde greeted the quartet as they entered the kitchen. He seemed to be deeply engrossed in both measuring dried mint and keeping Gaara from eating it. 'Does anyone else want tea?'

The ANBUs only shook their heads. Drinking tea from Kazekage's kitchen? Surely not a thing they'd do right now. Gaara looked at Minato with frown that seemed to be glued to his face more often than not for the past few days and protested loudly against the cup being held away from him.

'Aaaagh!'

Minato rolled his eyes and huffed.

'Little Red, you don't even drink the tea. I give you tea, you take a sip and then you don't want it anymore, and you've done this at least four dozen times in the past week alone, and it's not any different now than it was the last fifty times.'

Gaara looked at Minato patiently like if he was the one trying to wait through the time of completely illogical behavior of the blonde and not otherwise. But before he could protest even louder or even make sure that a big sandy hand couldn't be helpful here, the Lark entered the room.

'Here, cold.' he said, showing the object that visibly steamed in the hot still air.

'Oh, my hero.' Minato said, taking the toy and almost biting back a delighted moan when he felt that wonderful coldness on his skin. A little too cold for baby, but in this temperature only a moment would take for it to thaw enough. Already bits of condensation were forming on the surface. 'Remind me to buy something nice for Wren when he gets out.'

He looked down at the thing, looking for any sort of instructions (besides dishwasher friendly there didn't seem to be any) before holding it a few moments in front of Gaara's eyes for inspection.

'Well? What do you say to this?'

Gaara's attention was obviously caught by the new object, especially as it was emitting the strange visual cloud puffs he had never seen before (not that he had seen clouds before, maybe the poor imitation of it if one or two ninjas decided to poof out in smoke… which didn't happen often in Suna). But as Minato was still holding onto the cup of mint he decided that the smell was much more interesting than the circular steamy object. Minato, who was well versed by now in the arts of 'scent cue holds higher regards for adorable and deadly' simply dunked the toy in the mint tea and held it again in the same place.

'There you go Little Red, minty fresh. Two for the price of one.'

And Gaara immediately reached out for it. It was almost too perfect to have the thing offered now (his short memory obviously was sparing him the boredom of having it being offered many times before) and he had gladly caught on the thing and started gnawing upon it. Only to drop it on the floor three seconds later. The thing was not tasty, it just smelled nice. And it was weirdly tingling against his hands. He looked at it as it laid on the floor unmoving, wondering why such a thing happened to be that way – the ideology of colder than the skin temperature never once occurred him physically so now he was unable to proceed with it. The fact his teeth didn't hurt him as bad at the gnawing didn't really make sense either. Minato looked down at the thing, then took a very long, deep breath, physically moving the baby attached to his chest in the moment.

'Okay. All right.'

Then he bent down, writing the by now often used symbol on the loose sand.

Truce.

'This is good for him. It will take the pain away. And yes, it does need to be cold.' he told the sand, not trying to pick the thing up yet. 'Any sort of help on coaxing him to take it will be appreciated.'

Shukaku lazily opened one eye on the ground and wrote back in sloppy writings.

_What do you want human._ it was, as the toy laid unmoving and untouched.

'Tell baby it's a good idea to munch on this.'

The eye looked at the toy slowly and then back at Minato.

_Food._ it wrote under it and closed. Minato looked from the sand to the ANBus- it was generally their job to randomly throw some carcass to the thing. ANBUs looked at each other.

'I thought you fed it.' said Thorny Devil quietly to the Vulture. The man shrugged lightly.

'I did. Half of the livestock went right in one batch.' he muttered back 'Any more and we will be crossing the red line for this month and it isn't even half of it.'

A pause. The masks looked blankly at each other.

'There's some decaying stock that had been laying uselessly on the nearby street, probably accidentally poisoned by puppeteers brigade.' said Lark slowly. Vulture nodded.

'I will bring it.'

A few minutes later the unsavory and brutal sounds started going off from one of the forever closed rooms, along with the faint smell of rotting meat. Gaara looked up at Minato, then at the direction of the sound and started moving his nostrils, thrilled and excited. The mint tea was forgotten.

'Ahn…' he started and looked around. A moment later he looked at the blonde and reached out for his face 'Daah! Buuh!'

'What is it, baby?' Minato cooed, trying to ignore the unsavory task the ANBU trio (plus one) must have been going through. He nuzzled the baby's head. 'Are you going to try the toy now? It'll do you good, I promise.'

Gaara looked properly unsatisfied at the talking. Sure, he enjoyed all the attention man was giving to him but as it was not making him feel any better now, he slowly ceased his movement and laid back while starring at the ceiling. His gums started to ache again so he slowly started to frown in a soon-to-become-crying-sequence. Another one in this unholy week.

'All right, all right…' the blonde again picked the toy -now well into the process of becoming a slushy one instead of frozen- and after dunking it again on the tea to clear the sand out of it, he held it in front of Gaara's face, close enough he'd just need to lean into it to get a good grasp. 'Open wide, baby.'

Gaara took it in his hands again as he was given it, almost by the reflex and took it in his mouth, led by the scent – also by the reflex. It once again didn't taste of anything satisfying, but his gums swelled nicely and calmed down as he kept chewing on slushy and chilly thing so he just kept on doing that until his frowns smoothened and then he did it some more. That was peaceful. Everything about this man was peaceful. The bonds he kept patiently sporting toward the blonde figure now tightened even more.

'You like that, baby?' Minato said, finally relaxing a bit. He reached for the tea that was now a bit more on the lukewarm side and provably had a generous amount of sand on it -and took a long sip anyway. It was water, and the sand would probably just gather in the bottom of it.

Probably.

'We probably should get you another one, too…' Or a couple dozens. Just in case they ever needed a spare. And one for his own blonde, toothy baby wouldn't hurt, though he wasn't quite sure Naruto wouldn't just tear it to pieces. He wondered if now he'd be able to spare a clone to go look for Naruto. It really depended on how Gaara took the next days either way. Minato just hoped it would include some actual sleep because he swore that by now there was no way he'd ever manage to wipe the soldier pill taste off his throat.

Gaara didn't answer at first, slowly munching on the wheel with a pace that would make Buddha impatient, and then simply let go of it, making it fall down lower on his belly (where it started laying completely unnoticed). The new toy that was provided was surely fun, but it was nothing as satisfying as something else… like… let's say… milk.

Lately he grew fond of it, very much, even if for some reason he started getting it tarnished with all sort of strange adds. He looked up at Minato and squealed impatiently. He wanted it. Now.

Minato laughed, and there might or might have not been the barest hint of impending dementia on it.

'What? What now, baby, sugar, precious little redhead of mine?'

Hadn't the baby liked the toy? Hadn't the stupid raccoon told him to get it? Gaara looked up at the sound of voice, wondering what the new words could mean, but only briefly so. Slowly, blinked and looked around, stopping his eyes on the man's face again. It was precious and he would love nothing else but to be close but…

'Nnn…' he muttered and reached out for the clothes, slowly scrunching over in negative emotions 'Eee…!'

'See, this is why you should talk.' the blonde said as he shifted the baby a little to the side, trying to figure out what he could possibly want this time. He didn't seem to need to be changed, his gums couldn't possibly be hurting (the pinched look in his face wasn't the one related to pain, or at least it didn't look so to Minato) and he'd just annoyed him for his tea two moments ago. It couldn't be that either.

'What do you want? A story? A game? Food? Water? Milk? Because it you want alcohol, baby, I can tell you I could use some myself.'

Gaara flailed his arms at another stream of words that didn't provide anything. Sure, he loved when the man just kept talking to him, it was highly entertaining, especially when he started to get excited over a simple syllable he kept saying outta the blue from time to time but now… now he wanted one certain thing. Why couldn't the pretty man understand him after so long with being with him (and that meant forever and a half since his memory still lived outside the time frames)? He frowned then simply broke into sobbing as he usually did when people ignored his needs. Sand on the floor moved impatiently and started searching out for the who-knows-where abandoned bottle.

'Daaah!... Uwaaah!...'

'Oh, Gaara…' Minato sighed, giving it a distracted glare as he sidestepped it. 'It really would help if you decided to learn and talk. It really would make wonders for how fast you get what you want. You should consider it.'

He tried giving him the toy again, but since Gaara didn't seem interested in it, he just walked towards the fridge to put it in the refrigerator. At the sight of the refrigerator, Gaara immediately reached out toward it, not stopping with his crying – or even, if it was possible, crying louder. That was the thing he wanted. Tall, white, tasty…

'Bubu!'

…whatever it was, he wanted it exactly from there.

Minato caught Gaara when he decided to make a dive for the floor, actually beating the sand for the umpteenth time and angrily shooing it when after a moment it decided to stick to him instead. True to promised, Minato had no intention of dropping this baby, even if he was half dead on his feet and this close form seriously considering suicide.

'Yeah, but you know? 'Bubu' might be a lot better an indicator if you didn't use it for everything.' Minato complained, even though he had finally seemed to figure out what the baby wanted. After another moment to give the little body some much needed adjustment, he reached for the bottles. These days Gaara was almost out of drinking the donkey milk, now drinking a mix of it and water and goat's milk something Minato was immensely thankful for. Not that it really was any better, but given how strongly his mind reveled to milk coming from a donkey, it just seemed better to him.

'Here, baby.' he said, just giving him a bottle, since Gaara had already eaten his 'porridge' not too long ago. 'And try not to choke on it.'

Gaara took it within his hand and immediately started chugging it like a thirsty man on… well, the desert, but slowed down once he reached his fifth swallow. Then he laid back, comfortably in warm breathing body of Minato and kept on sucking the salty watered meal. To be fair, he wasn't hungry at all, but this felt just right to this poking guttery feeling he kept on sporting for the past few hours. He looked up, giving Minato the look of pure adoration and gratefulness as he kept on sucking on the contents. The tall blonde man with a bottle nearby and everything was right with the world. Minato gave the baby a small smile.

'Happy now?'

Gaara didn't answer. But that was only because to do that he'd have to stop eating.

'Glad to hear so, Little Red.' Minato said, finally sitting down in the chair and practically melting into it. 'Now let's try to remain in this wonderful mental state for the immediate time.'

And such happened. Surely, baby wasn't very fond of the toy, especially when it was chilled to the one and all that was left of the gel in it, but he grew accustomed to it and kept on chewing it in the most gravy times. Slowly, the swelling started reaching its peak when it came to his upper jaw, so it was somehow a saving. Nobody knew how much, of course, but maybe it was better that way. With the baby now in more manageable levels there wasn't much left to be done- besides the inhuman amounts of homework that Minato somehow managed to finish, even if his wrist was throbbing, and he swore he was seeing scribbly-dotty on the walls by the time he was done.

All that was left to do for them was waiting for the package that Minato had requested, mostly consisting in several more of the cold chewing toy for Gaara in case something happened to the only one they currently owned. Minato had paid for all of it from his own pocket and if the Kazekage had even heard of it, he didn't say anything, which provably suited both of the men (and by extension, the affected baby) just fine.

And then, the evening came. Surely, not first and not the last, but it was one of those calm and peaceful ones that didn't bother anyone and even made one or two ANBUs undress from their usual vests. Daichi came down once, twice from his office and then got back to it with a steaming hot cup of herbal coffee (which was the most not-dull and exotic thing that Suna seemed to have invented yet, not counting the usual weird kitchen that was provided by some woman who was placed in the kitchen in spot of Yashamaru). Lark and Wren kept on playing cards with Wren occasionally checking the things Minato wrote for his given homework and Vulture quietly kept on eating the raw meat on one of the windowsills. Thorny Devil had to go home early on special circumstances.

Gaara for such a peaceful atmosphere, was quite lively. He kept on bouncing, eating and pointing at different things, including Minato writing utensils he tried to gnaw upon (almost bringing another catastrophe as his jaws became really tender lately) only to gnaw, suck, lick and do everything little babies did with cold circles full of coldish gel. It was maybe not much welcome by others, but not unforeseen as the moon shone sweetly well on the sky, its full form bright and present in the life of all shinobis in Suna. The sand lazily kept moving around the floor and in the air, keeping the dust at the barely-breathable level for most of the time. So far, he was quiet, but the way eyes kept on suddenly opening on the walls here and there just left the tangy feel on the tongue, just like the static electricity right before the storm. Nobody ignored it but also nobody was really prepared for it as all of them kept on being exhausted from Gaara's unbearable behavior for the past weeks. Especially not for something like this.

It happened innocently, almost too naively; Gaara's toy fell on the floor and bounced off at least twenty centimeters too far for an accidental drop. And then, the kid flailed his arms for it… and against Minato. Forcefully.

'Mmmh!' he blurted out, pushing at the skin he kept on clinging to for the most of the time 'Gyah!'

And then, the pushing changed into the kicking. Kicking Minato, that is.

'Ow! Gaara…!' Minato shifted the baby, who at the time had been sitting on his lap so all that kicking hadn't been much appreciated. It was a good thing he was the size he was at these moments, even with his new diet he'd started to get a little heavier and even somewhat pudgy. 'Careful there, baby.'

He accepted the fallen toy from Wren and passed it to the baby.

'I thought we agreed that playing fetch wasn't a game we partake in.'

Gaara looked at Minato, bewildered, not accepting the toy. This time it fell on the floor in the usual pattern, simply by being let go and rolling away as far and as long the gravity and floor rubbing didn't stop it. Then, with one strong (too strong) push he had almost fell on the floor on his own, making all ANBU look at him in alert. Green eyes blinked, looked at them and at Minato, his vision strangely focused and… hostile. The mouth he kept opened again started leaking saliva outside. One drop… two drops…

'Is he… bleeding?...' asked the Wren, forgetting entirely about his couple of kings he held in his hands and getting closer, ready to jump into the action any time. Lark immediately moved the lamp into direction of Gaara's face. Indeed, the darkened saliva wasn't saliva at all this time. Now it was simply blood.

'What the hell…' Minato looked at the toy, which by now was showing the first signs of being used often, but other than that held no sharp points or really anything that could have caused this, nothing the baby could have cut himself on. His nails? Gaara's were often rather sharp, no matter how much he *tried* to keep them short, but Gaara usually sucked on his whole hand, or the knuckles, not the fingers themselves, and he hadn't just now…

The redhead didn't even try to wonder with him about that; he kept breathing heavily, taking on the moment when everyone in the room kept on looking at him. And then, his eyes simply rolled back into his head and he let out a loud shrilly scream, showing the world insides of his mouth, that seemed to start growing teeth faster than the second hand on the clock moved. A moment later the kazekage fled out of his office, looking entirely not amused but also not understanding what was going on; the sound didn't agree with him at all as Gaara usually didn't let out such sounds before but that couldn't mean anything good. And surely by the point he looked out at his third kid in line, Gaara was indeed more of a monster than a human now, covered in sand that stubbornly kept covering his body and forming new shapes over it, despite the fact Vulture tried to keep it off with sound barrier. His mouth were full of sharp pointy teeth that dripped blood all over the floor. And that wanted to bite Minato on his throat.

Minato was having a very nasty flashback to the last war, where an enemy's summon had tried to do the same exact thing to him. Who would have thought that such a tiny, fluffy, disproportionate plush toy could have such a strong bite? He still hard the scars right on his collarbone, and he'd probably have them on his neck if taicho hadn't physically removed the thing off of him. He didn't really have that much to bother with such memories, though, he had a monstrous baby to barter with, and it seemed rather decided to kill him. The new seals they had been working on, given how the first versions had started to become less and less useful the longer Gaara remained stressed. It's not like if they had had time to test them, but right now he was willing to risk it.

Much to the dismay of ANBUs, Gaara didn't let him attach the seals onto the skin… or anywhere nearby it, as the sand was mostly covering him now and making the tiniest version of Shukaku that ever existed in history of Suna. Once he smelled Daichi enter the room, his whole attention was on the man and he jumped off Minato like from the trampoline, aiming at Daichi's face like the weirdest land shark on this side of the world. Simply by the reflex Daichi grabbed the nearby thing (neatly overwritten notebook, much to the biggest despair of Wren) and slapped it off the trajectory of his face. Gaara landed on the floor with a deafening thud and let out a scream, staining the floor with his own blood. Then, the sand simply gathered and closed around him in the perfect circular shape as the walls started whispering nonsense - mostly hand seals without the proper logic or meaning.

A moment later, the whole ball was stuck with overwritten old seals that simply made the sand freeze, in this situation closing the baby in its own prison.

'I don't think this will work for long.' Daichi said, watching the ball rocking lightly as the being in it screamed and cried from anguish and pain. 'But at least he doesn't want you to accompany him anymore.'

The last sentence was clearly told to Minato even if the man was not looking at him when he uttered it. Pity. He actually started considering dragging the man to bed now more seriously, but he couldn't miss the fact he actually held the man too long right here. And he needed his kids home. Even if it meant Yashamaru coming back for the period of time again. The blonde Hokage made a loud, affronted sound and furiously wiped at his face- see, now he regretted being down to his undershirt, sleeves would have been nice in this situation- and quickly got back up.

'Ants.' he said as he pushed everything that wasn't immediately useful (and that meant tea cups, piles of 'homework', his books and Lark's winning hand)'Put the Ants around it. And I'll need someone help me fish the baby out as fast as possible, we need to stick restrain seals on him before the thing gets movable again.'

What now? Gaara hadn't been sleeping had he? He had been nowhere near sleepy all day, and while babies dropped fast asleep every now and then, at least it showed when it did so. Yes, he had been wide awake, Minato was sure of it. Could Shukaku force himself into Gaara without any outside prompt? He apparently could make him grow predator teeth out of will (oh, he dearly, dearly hoped these would be milk ones).

'I don't know what is it and I don't want any more victims so far, so unless it attacks first I'm not putting anyone nearby it.' said Daichi, looking at the sand ball in the tense pose. He was sure the seals could last at least for an hour, but one was never too sure. 'If the sand moves off him, we will get him out, if it doesn't, we don't. It's not like he will suffocate in there.'

'And what if he falls asleep inside there?'

Daichi didn't find a proper answer to that. Quietly, he moved in front of the ball and looked at it. It seemed to be symmetrically thick and thus – hard to move at all.

'…if I use explosives, the seals will also break.'

'Concentrated fir- no wait, that would never work…' Sand did turn to glass with some fire, and glass was easy to break. Of course, before getting there, it turned into happy neon orange hot-hot sludge. Such a thing dripping over baby… yeah, not such a good idea.

'Doesn't it have a weak point?"

Daichi looked at Minato like if he was not the brightest one he knew so far.

'Do you want the sand that can harden more than thirty centimeters width steel to have a weak point? Ichibi is bijuu known for having perfect absolute defense, it's unbreakable. Even for people like me.'

Minato opened his mouth to retort-his expression alone hinting to the fact that whatever came out wouldn't be particularly nice or flatterin … but in the end he just let out a very long drawn out breath.

'…don't' ask me what I want. You don't want me to go there.'

He had no idea what the man meant with 'even people like me' and he didn't want to find out. It seemed there was no way out of this.

'So, basically, we just have to wait for this to soften enough we can fish him out and we can just hope he won't decide to take a nap in the middle of it.'

'Something like that.' muttered Daichi looking at the hardened ball of sand. 'But by the way he is voicing his opinion on that matter I don't think he is feeling very sleepy.'

Indeed, Gaara's voice could be heard very clearly through it, and it was just as angered as pained. Minato frowned- he could hear it too. It made weird, unpleasant things squirm in his chest. He hated having the baby in such a distressing situation and being unable to do anything… but sadly, the redhead was right about this. There was nothing to do but wait.


	16. 16th

The on goings on the Namikaze house were another cup of tea altogether (even though the name of the residence itself was up for question, what with all its current inhabitants not technically being Namikazes themselves). Not that Naruto knew any of this. Oh, he did know Da wasn't around anymore, he had left with the unhappy Red Man with no smile, and ever since he'd sometimes come back and more often than not didn't, and for awhile Naruto had been so lonely and angry, with no one but the short green family person to care about…

Sure, there had been the nice girl with the squiggly face, and she'd been really good to play with, much better than the little girl from before that often left him in bed so she could roll around and wrestle with her friend, her but she had left too. The nummy thing scribble girl had given him, the one with the sweet filling had been nice, but it had been awfully sad and lonesome afterwards. He didn't know for how long, but it had to have been some long time, and then the odd no-face in lines had brought him the happy man.

At the beginning he wasn't very sure he liked the happy man- in fact, he'd thought it was all a mistake. Sure, he had been calling VERY LOUD for Da to come back, so maybe the problem was that he hadn't been specific enough on him wanting Da and not just anyone- and he did look kind of like Da. He had light hair, like Da, only it was all wrong and more like Da's color if he had put a lot of the thing the floor was made of to cover it. He also had sky eyes, but his were more like water, instead of sky, so they were sky-water or something strange like that. Maybe the white no-face had just heard him calling and thought he meant this man, but even if he tried to explain it to him he left before he could finish, leaving the happy man with him.

Sure, he knew how to grab him (more comfy than Da) and he made really yummy nommies (much yummier than Da!), and had one of the most interesting smells he'd ever felt yet…! (spicy things and bitter things and wild dust and bright, exiting smells, all sorts of them…!) but most of the time he gave him a happy face that didn't seem happy at all, and that confused Naruto. It looked like that white glass thing he had accidentally toppled and the green family person put back together. It still sort of looked the same, only just all broken.

To Naruto, the man's happy seemed broken.

At the beginning that made him think maybe the happy man was dangerous- for sure the green family person made a lot of unhappy noise about it!- but he never did anything bad. In fact, when Naruto's mouth hurt so sad, horrible, angry bad; the sort of bad that the crunchy spicy stick couldn't fix, he'd put him in his lap and made his hand glow with warm green magic. And then he'd put the magic on his mouth and all the pain had gone away.

It was at this moment that Naruto decided he loved Yassmaru (what the green family called the happy man, he was sure of it), broken and all. He stopped fussing when the man picked up, even started offering him his arms for the taking and went straight to him when the awful ache in his jaw started. He also tried to fix his broken smile, which usually meant lots of patting and sticky fingers around the wonderfully smelling man, well accompanied with lots of talks and explanation on what he was doing.

Yashamaru on the other hand at first felt nothing but a vicious dread and hatred toward the baby. It was small, it was loud and it was repugnant, just like all babies he had to take care of – and especially the last one. It had to be around the same age or older because it was doing and going through exactly the same things Gaara did just now and the resemblance made him want to throw it into the oven even more. Not to mention that it was a genetic misconception, as it was obviously a copy of the father. Same atrocious blonde that no man on the desert sported as everything bleached in the strong sunlight and very clear, strong colored eyes (blue! Goddarn!). Hokage-chan surely was laughing at him from somewhere and he felt like punching the kid only because of that unclear assumption. He felt that the Kazekage was punishing him for something, like he always did. He didn't know why he was assigned to the kid. He didn't want it.

But then, he could not really hate the baby that didn't do any harm to him. Sure, there was Gaara, but Gaara was different. It tore it's way to the world through his sister's womb and torn her apart while he ate her alive. It was more than nothing, it was everything and some more to call it 'harm'. And then it had those awful red hair, so much like the father. Maybe brighter, but he didn't really care about that. No man living in the shadows could have the hair bleached. The little vampire never felt the heat of the real ray of sun yet. He hated it anyway.

So at the first days he nursed Naruto with mitten gloves – metaphorical, he didn't want to get blisters – and touched him and played with him only when it was absolutely necessary. But this, strangely given, was enough for him to notice that Naruto actually wasn't a photocopy of Hokage-chan. Actually, it was just a mystification, the kid was only trying to look like the man – it was the complete opposite of a depressed quiet and sarcastic laid-backer. Obviously, when having an option of becoming repugnant with personality and repugnant with looks, it chose the lesser evil. Yashamaru always thought that mother nature was smart in some way. It was smart in such kids, it was smart in making him the shadow of his own sister who was all good so he could carry on all the sins. It was the outside world that made such biological failures like Daichi rise high and breed into small little abominations like Gaara. Mother nature was smart and let his sister live inside Temari fully and once again only took looks of the man while leaving all good that was in grandfather of the house inside the head of little Kankuro. Of course, the leash he held over Daichi was too long for his own likes, but who could blame him? Daichi was an invisible man, he was always nowhere to be seen when one needed him to be. It was the Third Kazekage who took him away from the loving harsh palm of the parent and let him run free, unmaking all good mother nature tried to create in the very beginning with letting the man live. Third Kazekage was a failure and the worst leader of all villages – so what if he was strong? He did nothing good and Daichi continued with that, sinking the village under the debts and the palm of his crazy son. In his opinion, both of them – which meant the Third and Daichi – should go back to the womb to get rid of all wrongs in the world and then be reborn without a trace of bad habits. But as the fate was merciful, the Third by now probably was. When he started believing in reincarnation, the grave became no better thing than the womb for a child. If gods liked him well enough, soon Daichi will follow the failure of a leader.

He smiled at Naruto, smiling at his looks and lively self. Mother nature was merciful too. When he squinted his eyes just a bit, he could actually see that this Naruto kid was actually a bit like Karura. Looks wise. Maybe if Daichi wouldn't try to act smart on his failures to breed his sins, Gaara would look exactly like that – a sunshine kid with blue-blue eyes, who knew? And maybe he would be just a normal lively kid, like this one, and not some puke-worthy killer who lived off the rotten meat. Maybe it was gods's will to make this kid rise with a good talent and example like him and to leave him with a kid he really would cherish instead of some unworthy monster. Because gods's obviously saw he suffered enough.

'You're a cutie. Maybe I should kidnap you? It would you do good to stay away from Hokage-chan and that sick family of mine.'

And to him too. Maybe it was meant to be for him to rise the future of humanity and not some dirty jinchuuriki. Especially as he had Temari and Kankuro with him. It felt almost normal now. If only Karura was there… they would need no one else. No one. He cuddled Naruto close, rubbing its back quietly.

'I keep an eye on you.'

'Fwuh?'

Naruto looked up at him, the body of a jointed doll sticking out of his mouth while he dedicated what probably amounted to half the denture he'd own in the future to leave as accurate prints of his fangs for the future generations as possible. When he noticed Yashamaru watching him he smiled at him around the puppet's face and leaned his face on the older man's chest, emitting a low, cooing sound. The man certainly needed lots of encouragements when he started trying to smile like normal, and Naruto wasn't one to disappoint.

Life was good. He had Yassmaru and he had the green family person and now he had little sun female and little earth male to play with. Earth color male was a bit sullen to play with even though he had great toys, but sun color female was all sorts of fun, dragging him to play with her by her own volition and doing strange things to his hair. There was always something interesting to do or eat now, especially when he'd recently mastered this whole bending knees and pushing up to hold himself away from the floor. It was just a matter of paying attention and moving hands and knees so he could actually reach things, even if Yassmaru sometimes took the really interesting ones away.

Like the little things with many-many legs he'd tried to eat. If only Da would come back so he could tell him all these things and show him, everything would be perfect.

Gamakijou also wished Minato would come back as he observed the mednin through slanted eyes, the loose skin under its jaw poofing in and out while he smoked in his precarious perch by the window. For a while he had thought Jiraiya's brat had just succumbed to the heat and gone into developed irrational paranoia -why, toads left their kids in the communal ponds and they grew up just fine! Surely all this aberrant coddling just so a single pollywog would reach tadpolehood had to be something out of their inferior mammal evolutionary process- but it seemed human children really were just that frail. And lacking any sort of common sense.

Apparently living with the One-tail wasn't enough a danger, he'd also had to make sure the blonde pollywog wouldn't try to eat something damaging (as a sensible creature he could only encourage his tendency to search appropriate nutrients from the right sources, but one would think he'd know that fire desert ant's would likely melt his tongue!) and now keep this suspicious person under heavy watch. He kept making comments about stealing or otherwise taking the pollywog with him and away from his father. He had the feeling it was explicitly to rile him up, but he wasn't going to take chances with it. This was their future ninja summon the man was playing with. Even if Naruto wasn't old enough to sign the contract, both Minato and Jiraiya had already stated he'd work with them, and toads always took care of their ninjas.

He wished he could be taking care of Minato, though. He had the feeling the older brat needed it more than this little one right now. Yashamaru also observed the frog, not really paying attention to the damaged doll. It wasn't his anyway, and elder Chiyo surely had enough of dolls to play with from what he remembered – one more or less wouldn't make a change. She was owing it to him anyway. Like the whole family.

He didn't really like the animal but also didn't really bother. It seemed to smoke a lot, but then, who didn't? Daichi was the weird one, because unlike all normal men, he didn't try to use tobacco that was grown in the more wet regions of the Wind country. After all, tobacco was a thing that held their monetary status stable, as much as Daichi wanted to deny it. And kids… could learn early. Like this one.

'You're such a drop of honey. Actually a whole glass of honey. Just look at you, Naruto, look at you.' he cooed as he tickled the thing on the tender skin. This kid was so much fun once he learned that it actually could laugh. In his original household laughing was one of those things he remembered, living with three kids that were unable to muster a normal laugh was a torture. Sure, Temari and Kankuro were enjoyable at first, but then they had to be 'like daddy' and since Daichi probably brushed his teeth with ashes as he never really smiled, the kids copied it. The monster also never really smiled. Only maybe when it was very, very dangerous. It was better he didn't smile. But Yashamaru hated it. He hated it so much he actually liked to sit with a bitter frog more that in the company of bitter Daichi. He poked the kid on the nose and started yet another attack on the sensitive sides of the child. This was a relief.

Naruto, who hadn't been blessed with mind reading abilities and knew nothing of the older man's dull, grey life (or the fact it had been ruined by a monster living less than a kilometer away) just squirmed and giggled loudly, actually dropping the toy and bouncing excitedly when the man took a pause, clearly waiting for the next onslaught of tickling. Yes, Yassmaru was the bestest. Now if just Da could come home so he could show it to him…

#+#+#+#+#+#

Minato unfortunately hadn't had the luxury of thinking much about his son. He had been too busy discussing with the Kazekage and the Ant ANBU team in charge of sealing on a possible way to prevent the monster from spreading all over the house and it's surroundings (and thus, the city) once the outdated seal that had been used started losing power. Not that there seemed to be a sign of that. It had taken them all about forty minutes to get organized and get to their places, and through all of that Gaara hadn't so much as stopped crying. Or lessened the volume, really.

The constant cries were the worst of it, because everything told him to just pick the baby and try to shush him, but it was kind of hard, because the baby was wrapped in a bubble of sand that as far as he saw it was airtight. He had asked the group several times if they were absolutely sure the baby could breathe in there. Of course, it was a stupid question, given the volume of the cries even through the muffled barrier of the sand hardly hinted towards asphyxiation, but he still didn't like the idea of Gaara trapped there.

Of course, he also didn't know if he wanted him out. Naruto's fangs were pointy and sharp and certainly destructive, but they were still just fangs. Gaara's mouth seemed to have suddenly developed into an entire mouthful of fangs. And he doubted the monster had aimed such things for the explicit goal of munching on leaves.

_Do you know of human children, Ichibi?_

No, the thing didn't know. Not one bit, just look at the state of the baby… but then again, that's what Minato was for, right? Just to be helpful and explicit.

_He should have started teething several months ago-_

And as far as Shukaku was concerned, there was no day like today to start a new pet project. Minato who was also blessed with an artistic mind could envision it oh so clearly. The proverbial light bulb flickering to life as the thing processed the words and reached the logical conclusion after several long paused dedicated to exclusively wishing itself drunk. Of course the baby didn't want raw meat. He didn't have teeth for it! That explained everything.

Actually, no, it didn't explain anything, as the fact Gaara's stomach would never be able to process raw meat right now wouldn't even occur to the deranged raccoon, but that didn't matter. The thing forced the body to *make* teeth he should have gotten in- what? Three, four years? All at the same time. Did he think he wouldn't also be able to adjust his body just as easily given a little time?

No. Not at all.

'…enough.' he said from his slumped position on the table. Blue eyes peeked over the skin of his arm, looking all the paler between the dark clothing he wore and the uneven stains of blood the baby had drooled on him. They were also surrounded by bags, not quite as dark as Gaara's, but not far away either. 'Enough. I'm done with this. I can't take this anymore.'

He stretched his arms in a curious cat light fashion, then rolled the shoulders. They made an obscenely loud crack, something between dry wood and ice being broken. Then he straightened up.

'That thing's cheating. I'll make it wish it had never lets it's fucking teapot.'

That made everyone's eyes look at the figure.

'What exactly are you planning to do?' asked the Kazekage, obviously getting nervous 'We're not in state to handle another sandstorm. Don't rush into things.'

Minato stared at him blankly for a moment, and then rubbed a hand over his face, leaving it covering his eyes for a few seconds.

'Can I ask you a favor?' he asked, not looking up. Daichi straightened up. He always treated such words with wariness.

'What is it?'

'…I know you are Sunanin.' The blonde said carefully. 'I know all of you are elite Sunanins. And that Sunanins don't talk back. And you all think that's great and I'm sure you all agree on that- but I need to talk. And I need you to talk back to me. All right? Because- I need to think- a lot- and I need to know when I'm saying stupid things, when I'm saying smart things; and when I'm not saying enough, I need you to ask me things. So-'

He made a gesture as if he were grabbing something, shook it for a minute, then dropped his hands in frustration.

'…talk to me, don't just glare… and tell them to talk to me too.' he pointed at the ANBU surrounding them. Daichi's eyebrows rose as high as they could on the naked forehead. That was… new. He didn't expect anything like that and he didn't know how to… demand it, but if that was what the man needed… he shrugged.

'You heard him.' he said to the group of silent ANBU behind him 'Talk to him, he needs that.'

The soldiers nodded, then they started looking into various directions, completely blown off by the command. After a long awkward pause, full of unspoken shame, finally one Ant stepped forward.

'We have nice weather today.'

'Yeah, it's nice.'

'Very nice.'

'All hot and so on.'

'Wasn't yesterday worse?'

'I think so.'

'Just like on the desert.'

'Who would have thought?'

'Oh, you.'

'Hahaha.'

And as much as it seemed to be normal talk, it surely didn't sound natural. Daichi observed it in silence, his face grim and closed off.

'…thank you." Minato gave the Kazekage a distracted small smile then turned to look at the sand sphere. Then he slammed a hand on the table with all intent of it being as loud as possible. The conversation cut off immediately.

'Not that small talk is out of the way. That?' he pointed at the ball of sand "Is wrong. Let's forget for a moment this is a baby or a monster or whatever the hell you want to call it. This is a jinchuuriki. We all unanimously agree on that, yes?'

Quietly, everyone nodded their heads. Daichi quietly rolled his eyes in the background. Minato nodded as well.

'This particular jinchuuriki is, age-wise around one year old, right?'

The ANBUs looked at each other this time, in silence.

'More or less.' muttered the Lark carefully.

'Yet his physical development is below normal.' he turned to the Kazekage. 'If you ignore the teeth he grew just now, based solely based on looks, muscle control and all those things mednin notice better than I do, how old would you say he is?'

Daichi frowned lightly.

'He hadn't changed since his eye color changed to green.' he said 'And that would be around his fourth month in this life. What is your point?'

'If I told you, you wouldn't like it, so just bear with me until I get to the point.' the blonde said, smiling at the redhead again, more animatedly than before. If they could get there 'We all know this b- the jinchuuriki is far behind on terms of physical development. We know he just started eating semi-solids what, less than a week ago? Either his whole system is slowed down or it was stuck and is starting back again, we can't know that right now-'

Minato made a gesture with his hand, as if to discard something unimportant.

'The matter is that Shukaku affects his growth. The lack of sleep can be blamed for some health problems, but not all of them, not with the supplementary chakra of the monster, right?' he looked at the Kazekage again for confirmation. Daichi had only frowned more.

'How the hell should I know.'

'You are a mednin. You had a great mednin at your disposal, and I'm assuming here you had that checked at some point, especially if this was done for the first time?'

'He was always slow on growing, this can be more than normal for him. His development hasn't stopped as you can see.'

'Slow kids are behind one, two, maybe three or four months, not over half a year worth of growth.' Minato argued, trying to keep up his theory while considering what the redhead was telling at the same time 'The sand doing it for him doesn't help, but he should be able to at least move a bit on his own by now, shouldn't he?'

He wasn't challenging the man, he was honestly asking. He only had one kid, and the redhead, as terrible as he could hypothetically be as a father (which might or not be up to debate at some other time where it could be afforded) already had had two kids before this one.

'Yes, by far he should be clearly trying to walk.' answered Daichi with honesty 'But that doesn't mean I want him to. He is problematic without moving around on his own.'

'Good! I mean, no-' Minato made the 'pushing away' gesture again. 'Forget what you want or don't want him to do, we are talking about what he can do and what he should be doing in the hypothetical case this was subject X who has no attachment to you and we are just analyzing."

He turned again towards the ANBU.

'And it's not that you starved him- Gaara just doesn't eat much.' Yes, none of these people he liked at varying degrees were stellar nannies and between leaving Naruto with them and Yashamaru he'd actually take some time trying to pick which was the lesser of the evils, but several months worth of videotapes showed that they often actively tried to coax the child to eat more. 'His muscles aren't developed enough. He's usually quiet, rarely hungry, rarely moves- let's say that the jinchuuriki's human body requires sleep. It can't sleep with obvious reasons, and since people die after I don't know how many days without sleep-'

'Ten days.' Wren added calmly.

'Thank you-' Minato nodded at him without really stopping what he was saying. 'The monster will instinctively divert part of the chakra to supplement for what's biologically missing. All this we know and agree with, right?'

'Yes, that's true.' said Thorny Devil. The others looked at Minato with mild confusion and interest. The blonde beamed at her as if she had answered a very hard question he'd slipped as a trick to academy students.

'Great! Now remember this and put it aside for a moment. Vulture...' he turned to the male who had been summoned back and that if the fact that all males were as far as physically possible it was to be of her person, was provably on her period. 'Your sound jutsu how many times a day at max power can you use it?'

'Twice, Hokage-sama.' said Vulture 'But it would be as big as this house.'

'Call me Minato.' The blonde said, nodding again 'And what happens if you use it all those times to you, physically?'

'I have to take off my mask.' was the answer. Daichi coughed at it but the man didn't correct his words. The blonde stared at him with a cautious smile.

'Without euphemisms?'

'I take it off.' said Vulture again. 'From my face. Like that-' and he moved his hand toward it. Lark immediately caught him by hand and put it down again.

'He never uses full power. There's no need.'

'Let's pretend I'm painting you this beautiful hypothetical scenario.' the blonde answered, the smile freezing and tightening just the tiniest bit. 'Let's pretend I want you to answer to me what happens to human body after depleting itself from chakra practically to the last of it.'

'Death.' was immediate answer of Wren. He didn't rise up his eyes through the whole talk for once.

'Yes! Thank you Wren, you make me so proud~' Minato patted the younger man on the head twice. 'Remember this and put it aside-' he didn't make the put aside gesture. This time he grabbed a wad of papers and stated looking around for something to write with.

'Back to medical facts, let's say people suffer from injury. All ninja have potential ability to perform basic healing jutsu, with varying degrees of success. Yet we generally don't use chakra to heal injuries unless it's something that requires immediate healing or threatens life. Why?'

'Because we need chakra to fight the cause of their injuries and to protect them from the future danger?' said one of the Ants.

Minato nodded again. 'What else?"

'They can heal on their own.' muttered Daichi, now tapping his fingers on the side of armchair 'Where is this all going? I feel like at school.'

'Consider it a private lesson, and my sensei would be in tears because you haven't figured out where I'm going with all of this.' the blonde said smartly, though not with ill intention. 'You could have just healed my back, but you spent three quarters of an hour taking the sand out and stitching it, why?'

'Cause you have sexy back. Why do you think I did that? Sand is dangerous around here.' said Daichi, stopping the tapping at the word 'sensei'. As far as he remembered, sensei of Minato was sannin and not just any – the legendary one. This was not something he wanted to get into about. 'Besides it could get under your skin and give you infection. Not to mention how it would get out later.'

If Minato had been a Sunanin, the words might have shocked him. He wasn't a Sunanin. Instead he was sannin Jiraiya(super pervert extraordinaire)'s prize pupil, caught mid rant in the throes of a brainstorm. The comment barely managed to register as thinly veiled sarcasm only to be immediately discarded.

'You still could have healed it with chakra after, instead of bothering with stitches. If I had gone with the same sort of wounds to Tsunade-hime, she would have hit me and told me to suck it up, then thrown me to a nurse for practice; and they would have done the same. Even during war, generally we stick to normal medicine instead of wasting chakra, and not only to keep our medics from tiring, right?'

'We do that because chakra preservation is the most important when you know that you will have to heal many people with fatal wounds you have no time and possibility to get to without complicated operation. It's obvious.' said Daichi rising his hands 'Besides, the number of medics who can do it for longer than two hours without break is limited. It's down to calculation of what get us better results.'

'Aaand…~ because on the long term it might do more damage than good, right?' finally seeming to have found a pen he agreed with, the blonde took a single sheet of paper and drew a crude human-shaped outline. 'Behold, the human body.'

He turned the paper around so the rest of the people occupying the room would be able to easily see it while he removed a different colored pen from one of his pockets.

'Artistic licenses aside, chakra pathway is sort of like the veins, it's everywhere and from what I get it just goes everywhere like this-" he started a single line done the body and then just followed it through the different parts of the body in a more-or-less accurate depiction of what was generally agreed to be the chakra pathway.'And they, they, uh… hey serve the same function for chakra as blood vessels do for blood. Along the chakra pathways, there over three hundred nodes- the tenketsu and they modulate the flow of chakra like circuit breakers, right?'

When the Kazekage and one of the red-marked Ants nodded, he continued.

'If you use too much chakra not only the medic suffers waste of chakra, but the body of the wounded person also suffers. If we ignore how physically painful it is, it exhaust the body because of the strain of recreating the cells and everything tied to tissue regeneration, but *besides* that, it can also literally burn the chakra pathways. It can- well- 'short circuit' the circuit breakers. That causes uneven flow of chakra, extra strain to correctly distribute the remaining energy, and so on.'

Daichi kept on looking at the picture for a moment, then shook his head shortly.

'Why are we even talking about this?'

'You really don't see where I'm going with this?' the blonde looked at loss at everyone in the room. Why did everyone always looked at him life if he were mad when he tried to explain things?

'I don't really care how damaged the chakra veins of Gaara are, if that's where it is going.' said Daichi harshly, looking at the ball in the corner 'Nor am I really concerned about his growth. As long as he can be trained to become a good weapon, I don't care about the rest. If you care because of the seal then tell us the needed minimum.'

The blonde rubbed his face as if talking to the Kazekage were giving him a headache.

'That's the point exactly! And you should have noticed after so long with him, so can you stop talking about weapons and Gaara and whatever else? Everything's wrong! Look at this-' Turning the paper around, he drew a noticeably smaller human figure.

'Let's say this is the jinchuurki. As human, he has a normal human chakra pathway. Even if he weren't underdeveloped it should be some ten or something years before he's physically mature enough for his chakra pathway to – maybe a little earlier, Sunanins develop faster…' The last part was a vague mutter as he inspected the drawing. 'At any rate, we generally wait until kids are in academy to teach them how to control and shape chakra exactly because before that it's dangerous for them. They can accidentally overexert themselves and damage them permanently, and at any rate it only really gets stable when they hit puberty. Right?'

Daichi didn't answer this time. Lark nervously eyed him and finally nodded to this.

'Actually, it's seven now, we lack reserves so-'

'This is ridiculous!' hissed the Kazekage, standing up from his chair 'What is the point of saying that? This cannot be reversed, you cannot extract bijuu from Gaara without killing him and the damage done so far cannot be restored! And I won't stop talking about weapons, because that's his purpose in life, you can as well want me to stop talking about the sand on the desert. If he is not to become weapon, his life is futile and Suna doesn't need him.'

'I'm trying to explain why your magical weapon is not working as you intended it to, and you aren't listening because you are too busy wondering about the extra features!' the blonde replied just as hotly- oh, he wasn't going to engage the redhead on yet another battle, and the least he wanted was for this man to think Gaara was better off death. Especially because he was the only one who actually had a chance to get close enough to the baby. And he didn't think he wanted to so much as read a mission asking him to snap a baby's neck issued by the father himself. No, he drew the line at that.

'This is the jinchiuriki's pathway, and it's intertwined with the Ichibi's-' he drew a much larger shape with corresponding chakra pathway, evenly mixed with the baby's 'But they are in no way the same. By all means, Gaara shouldn't be able to do all he's done so far. Manipulate sand, yes, destroy this house- yes, maybe- but what he's done so far? The sandstorms, the digging under the village, that's really far away, as far as we know Gaara isn't even aware there is something out there at all, so not only is there no way he was actually controlling what was happening, what reasons would he have to explicitly send Shukaku outside when he could have simply sunk the whole house and kill maybe forty or fifty people in one go?'

He tapped the pen on the drawing twice to drive the point home.

'Because the health and physical stability of the jinchuuriki depends on the Ichibi steadily making up for all the problems the lack of sleep brings, there is a limit to how much chakra Shukaku can pour on him without overexerting the jinchuuriki's chakra pathway. If that's, let's say, his life support, do you think he would compromise it for shits and giggles? He might be a superpowered human, but he is still human, using too much chakra would exhaust him, yet he's never really tired. Quiet, moody, sleepy- but not really *tired*. I've been watching months worth of videos, but he's never so tired he's just laying there like dead, and I've done that plenty times before when I didn't measure my chakra right. How much chakra do you think it took to make a storm that was still dangerous even with all of you working on a shield? While at the same time playing gopher under the village? That's, that's just insane.'

'Who knows how much of human is left in him anyway.' said Daichi, once again sitting in his chair 'He is a host, Shukaku eats his consciousness away. As far as I remember, previous jinchuuriki wasn't exactly himself in the last days of his life. Toddlers tend to not protect themselves for their unability from the higher powers of such kind so I think it's safe to say that there's more of skin to the child than his mind. In the other words: he is either a weapon working for us or a dangerous monster looking like a child who is no good for anyone around.'

For a moment Minato wondered which did he want to do the most, if burst into tears or jump to the Kazekage's chest, throw him on the floor and start banging his red-haired head onto the floor until he finally got rid of whatever was blocking the man's mind from accepting new thoughts. He was pretty sure if he tried really hard he could get some nice solid six or seven hits before the ANBU removed him.

'Did you understand a single word of what I told you? This is not me wishful thinking or drawing castles in the air, Kazekage-sama. This is what I'm telling you is happing as a seal-master. It doesn't matter how messed up the Ichibi makes it's intended host, it doesn't matter if the original seal was messed up or not. There is no physical way a human body could have sustained that amount of chakra. It would have burned his chakra paths and killed him long before now.'

'And have you heard what I just said now? Who guarantees that there's anything beside the skin left in Gaara, huh?' said Daichi, rising his tone of voice one note higher 'Has anyone cut him open to see if there are inner organs, chakra nets left? Shukaku might look like a sand, feel like a sand, smell like a sand – but he isn't it.'

He wasn't it and never would be, as far as all studies went. Bijuu were chakra demons and that's where it all ended, there were no exceptions. Shukaku had only this weird habit of actually using the sand to cover his own shroud – maybe because it was too small without it or maybe because it was some sort of sophisticated desire to add extra protection to itself – he didn't know. Usually it was possible to see what color of chakra everyone possessed, Shukaku's chakra was only a mystification under the thick coats of earth. Daichi was sure that if the sand of the whole earth disappeared, the demon would suddenly become Monster of Rocks or Ichibi of Mud Waterfalls. He looked to the wall with majestic frown.

'Being a host is being an open channel from the jinchuuriki to the outside world, and we don't know how far it went with this kid. He can as well use this body as a receiver to see what's going outside and working from it, while Gaara and his body could be nothing but decaying meat. If Gaara is dead, it doesn't matter if chakra nets are being torn apart, it's not if there's anything to hold him together beside one rusty seal.'

He looked at the side. He could have sworn that the ball of sand had twitched, but that was probably just his imagination. He was getting paranoid lately.

'If that thing in the corner is a monster in disguise it will never tire. Demons don't tire out because their chakra supply is never-ending. It's not like if there's anything else inside him to prevent the demon suppressed.'

'Do you realize we are talking about completely different things?' the blonde asked irately- the only reason he hadn't tried to throw something at the redhead's face was because he didn't think it would help his situation any.

'Well, do you? I'm not going to discuss with you what that baby is, and I don't *care* if it feels human, smells human or thinks humane thoughts, that has nothing to do with the topic and not up for debate.' Minato made an effort to calm down, but even though he managed it, his whole body was tense and expression far from friendly when he finally continued.

'Tailed beasts inserted in humans will always be weaker than wild ones; exactly because humans act as a restraint. I've seen jinchuurki, and I've fought with them before, how you sealed makes no difference. If all the chakra is released it kills the hosts. And sure, they shouldn't care because they can just regenerate, but those things don't know what death feels like and what they've felt they didn't like, so it terrifies them. No monster would risk going through it willingly, crazy or not.'

He leaned back on his chair, blowing on his bangs to keep them from getting on his eyes before crossing arms over his chest.

'All proof you need that Shukaku isn't on control is the fact your village is still standing. Does that fatass there strike to you like something with enough patience to keep all these humans alive? Do you think it would willingly stop before wiping everything in it's path? What, you think it has enough presence of a mind to say 'Oh, I better not eat all the humans on one go, otherwise I won't have anything to play with tomorrow?' If he could, he'd be at it nonstop until there was nothing else. And then it'd provably grow a fish tail and go play little mermaid in this Gigantic sandbox for the rest of it's days- or until it gets sealed again.'

Closing his eyes, he exhaled, blowing every bit of air he had on his lungs before taking another one.

'I've been thinking about this over for awhile now, and it's the only thing that makes sense. Based on Gaara's growth, there is no way he could do any of this without compromising the host. That means Shukaku isn't depending on Gaara to do the really big things. It has to be something else.'

'Like what?' asked Thorny Devil. The ANBU squad was so far only observing the ball hitting at each side and kept their mouth sealed.

'…I don't know yet.' The blonde admitted after a moment, finally breaking the staring contest with the Kazekage to lean over the table and massage his eyes 'I keep thinking about it, but I can't figure it out, there are just too many variables…'

Daichi had only looked to the side and crossed his arms.

'It's probably something minor,' he muttered. He had no idea what it could be though. Wren slowly put the point in yet another sentence he was writing in his notepad.

'Great Elder Chiyo-sama was the one who made the sealing herself, she could probably tell you more…'

He quieted down under the heavy glare of the redhead. Minato winced at the word 'minor', hesitated a moment if he weighted its measure, then shook his head.

'I don't know, it depends… It can't be a seal-' A seal to allow such control- it would have to be massive, there's o way anyone would miss that 'It's not something Gaara is doing yet is something triggered- or at least attached to Gaara. It's not something that thing is completely in control of, it's not something that damages Gaara- There are so many things that are wrong in here.'

He slumped more on the chair.

'Why was it able to do it from the beginning? Why doesn't it have complete control of it yet? Does it consciously know what it's doing? Does he know what triggers it? It has to know it can't do this through Gaara so there needs to be awareness of the fact it's happening at all-'

'Mi!'

If someone had smashed a full set of priceless china over a brick wall, it wouldn't have caused a bigger wave of silence on the group than the small voice. Minato immediately whipped around to look at where the ball of sand had been located last.

'…Gaara?'

The said object didn't resemble ball anymore. Actually, it was hardly there at all. The not-so-long-time-ago pile of sand now dissolved slowly into a pile of limp (and color-wise – darker) sand, uncovering the nut of it by sliding off it like water. The little redhead slowly rose his snotty face with sand sticking to it; tears and slime seemed to trail clear paths in the blood covered lower face, only to become full of dirt now that the sand tried to crawl away. Gaara looked around the room slowly, until his eyes caught the most blonde person in it.

'Mi!' he called out for his presence again, rising his hands up high, obviously wanting to be held. A row of perfectly white piranha teeth flashed out from his mouth as he did that.

'Oh.' the blonde said in a high voice that might have been confused by a coo if it hadn't been for the fact the tone was a little off and a little too bordering on plain hysteria 'Oh, hi. Hi Gaara, baby. There you are.'

The blonde made no movement to move out of the chair, but given the boneless way he was sitting on it, it might be just because he wasn't able to.

'And look at you. And your nightmare inducing teeth.'

Gaara blinked eloquently in response, like any intelligent son of the emperor would and let out a sound that could be placed somewhere between 'unf' and 'uwah' as he rolled to the side, trying to actually get closer to the source of voice. If the mountain will not come to Muhammad, then Muhammad… He was not educated to know that yet, but his instincts worked that life smartness for him already. Minato immediately stood up, self-preservation seeming to lost the battle with paternalistic feelings this little bundle of disasters seemed to stir within him.

'Remember me as a hero.' the blonde muttered, staying in place for a pregnant moment before taking a hesitant step closer.

'And if, you know, it eats me, just… just keep Naruto.' Another step 'Feel free to keep him for as long as you can.' another 'In fact, just keep him forever. Don't even tell Konoha I died. Just be nice to him.'

He stopped short of the baby, Gaara looking up and Minato himself looking into calm unpolished jade eyes. The points of the teeth poked out of the baby's lips barely, like some test on those silly 'what's wrong with this picture' games.

'…hi baby. You remembered my name this time, didn't you?' slowly he moved a hand closer and brushed the soft red hair on the baby's forehead, prompting a small river of sand to quietly swish to the floor.

'Mhh!' was the conversational answer as Gaara immediately reached out for the hand and almost, almost caught it, but then decided to actually look to the side and sneeze. Some of the remaining snot had covered a few centimeters in front of him. After briefly observing his snot hanging from his nose, Gaara once again reached for Minato. 'Mwaah!'

He missed the warm hands inside the tight and suffocating ball of sand. Inside it was much hotter, but the tall blonde man did something… different that made him want to stay close to him, not the sand. This was such a normal thing for the baby to do (sneeze, drool, all those not really hygienic but still normal things little kids did on normal basis) that Minato couldn't help smiling a little. Gaara's bib was a mess, but once turned around it still allowed him to carefully wipe as much of the baby's dirty face as possible.

'There we go…' he said when finished, stroking a satiny cheek with a single finger. Gaara stared up at him, still as interested in being picked up as before. Indeed. There they went. Stalling any more would buy him maybe a minute or two extra.

'…please don't bite me.' he said. Then picked the baby from under the arms and pulled him up close.

Gaara let out a squeal at that activity – something that sounded completely weird coming from him, especially as he never – and surely not now too – smiled. All ANBU stood up, ready to start throwing kunais at the baby, but just right when Gaara touched the chest covered in materials, he immediately let out another happy gurgle as he caught on the material. That was exactly what he wanted.

After a moment of brushing his dirty face against the material with happiness, one of the teeth caught on the loose thread and made the kid clamp his big pointy teeth over the shirt. Gaara looked at it, confused by the new sensation, and then actually reached out to his face to pack a hand to inside of his mouth and start touching his teeth.

'Uwh?' he said, looking at Minato as he finally let go of the frontal tooth. Chewing on the material later came just as quietly and naturally as any other thing.

'I uh… I don't… I don't think he's…' Minato kept looking at the baby. Chomping on his shirt was something he normally did back when he didn't have any teeth to complain about, and also when he'd started growing them '…I don't think he's trying anything weird.' he finally managed to say. After another moment of thinking, he cupped the back of the baby's head with his other hand and started stroking it in the usual calming way Gaara preferred. Gaara let out a calm sigh and slowed down the chewing process in favor of the lazy caress. Lark and Vulture slowly put their weapons down. Wren and Thorny Devil didn't.

'Are you sure?' she asked, looking at the baby who was making quite nice hole in the not so old ANBU covering. 'He doesn't seem to be very… safe with those teeth.'

'I doubt he is, but so long as he doesn't bite me…'

Minato looked down at the baby for a moment, then walked to the kitchen and looked around until he found a clean rag. Then he came back to the table, looked around for his discarded tea and shoved the rug into the teacup, giving it enough time to suck on the liquid before offering it to the baby.

'Here you go baby.' he said, offering him the tea-soaked thick cotton. 'Minty fresh all for you.'

Gaara looked at the offering with more than thankful interest as his eyes immediately lit up at the known exciting smell and… savagely tore off half of the rug, chewing on the wet part. It was only a few seconds later when he once again saw that the magic was held in smell and not the taste. Part of completely devastated cotton fell on the floor as Gaara looked at the rest of the thing in his hands, not knowing what was the purpose of it. It took him only a moment that, as most of the unknown things, it would be probably great suiting his taste buds and stuffed his mouth with it, jerking at it like if the fact it was sewn together was sin against humanity.

'…if I faint a little, do you think he'll eat me?' the blonde asked conversationally.

'Yeah, why not.' said Wren, pushing the so very tiny bottle under Minato's nose, with so very tiny crystals of smelling salts. 'I'd recommend not though, I don't want to see how he does that.'

Minato nodded with the same sweet smile frozen in place as he moved a hand over the younger man's mask and used it to push him away.

'Yeah… I better not, then. Wouldn't want to offend your delicate sensibilities.'

He stared. Gaara kept on trying to turn the kitchen rug into spaghetti stripes of cotton, or maybe just confetti.


	17. 10 and 7

It was half an hour later than everyone was again sitting on the table, utterly silent but for the sounds of Gaara rather enthusiastically digging on his new treat. The idea of the overly thick rope toy seemed to hold for the moment (which had recently promoted Vulture to unofficial 'Real man of genius') and even if Gaara finally managed to actually gut it out, easily replaced. In reality it worked as well as a band aid for a wound six inches wide and two inches deep, but at least it bought them some time to figure out what to do.

'… so.' the blonde said after several moments 'I'm open to suggestions beyond 'suicide en masse'.'

'Excuse me?' said Daichi, looking at both the blonde and the child 'I don't see what are you on about, he only grew teeth. Nothing to fuss about, his sand is more dangerous.'

'…excuse me?" Minato's head turned towards the redhead in a somewhat creepy doll-like fashion 'Let's put aside for a moment the fact you are not the one holding it- do you honestly think Shukaku made him grew these very pointy teeth just to munch on lettuce?"

'So far that's exactly what he does.' said Daichi and pointed at Gaara having actually some qualified fun with part of old rope 'It's not like they will grow longer or bigger, this would hurt him.'

'Have you ever had a cat, Kazekage-sama?'

'I have three kids. That's enough of faces to feed to bother with useless animals.'

For a moment the blonde said nothing, just raised his eyebrows lightly. The man had said 'three kids', not 'two kids and an abomination'. How interesting.

'I had lots of cats when I was little. And they often brought back home birds with broken wings, half dead snakes, half gutted mice and so. I thought they did it because they thought scaring my sister is funny, I certainly thought it was funny. But it wasn't that.' The smile he was giving the redhead was almost dreamy, and would have been quite pretty if it hadn't been for how the blonde's pallor and dark bags showed at the moment. It just made the smile seem wrong somehow. 'The cats liked us so much they wanted to take care of us. And they did so by giving us lessons. On hunting. They specifically dragged weak prey home so we'd learn to feed ourselves. Do you see where I'm going with this?'

Daichi looked at Minato in silence. Then he sighed and slumped down against his chair.

'…I guess we will have to start electrocuting him after all.'

The blonde closed his eyes, the smile seeming to seem statically standing in place.

'And how is that going to fix this problem?'

'Exactly the same as it fixes it for overly aggressive dogs.' said Lark with entwined hands over the table 'Some species cannot learn no matter what, but since they make good warriors and house defenders, they can only be taught by shocking impulses that doing wrong things, like biting their own master, will bring them unpleasant feelings.'

'We didn't do that before because nothing he did before was out of free motivation to communicate with us and it's stupid to punish the child for crying.' added Wren, wasting his pencil on overly blackened page 'If he tries that, we will have to start working against it.'

'Okay, you may have a point there.' Minato said, figuring that making sense would be more effective than getting mad with his companions. '…but don't you think it's much more likely he'll just figure out one of you is holding a stick that hurts him and… decide to relieve you of any limbs allowing you to hold up simple tools?'

'What about losing a limb?...' said Wren and stopped moving the pencil over the paper. Then he looked at him. All heads turned toward him and stayed that way, in silence.

'The way you insult my people is unbelievable.' muttered Daichi with grim voice.

'Yeah, I'm insulting because I like them enough not to want them missing arms, I'm the real bastard here.'

'We're all ready to die, we've always been.' said Lark, hiding his hands under the table 'Such small matters don't need to be bothered with during our work. Please, let's get back to the real thing.'

'So, electrocution… it will need a ninja who knows how to use raiton well.'

All faces turned toward Minato again. Minato didn't look particularly impressed.

'I'm going to assume you are all looking at something very interesting happening behind me.' The blonde said, leaning on the table and cupping his chin on one hand. The other sneaked around Gaara's middle and cuddled him close. 'Otherwise I'm going to assume you guys are suggesting I electrocute this baby. That would make me very sad.'

'Of course not. We will just send for someone to our far away neighboring nation. I'm sure they will help us.'

The way Daichi's teeth cracked against each other was painful to listen to. Minato's smile was saccharine in answer, something Yashamaru would have been proud of.

'That sounds like a sensible answer, because I wouldn't do it.'

'I wouldn't expect you to have balls if you can't actually throw away anything that is smaller than you.' muttered Daichi with a stone hard face. Then he closed his eyes and turned his chair around, so nobody could actually see anything but the back of the chair. 'I'm out of ideas. If it kills again, stop it, like usual.'

Minato rolled his eyes at the insult- even if his masculinity had somehow been offended by the comment, he would have to actually hold the man's opinion at some level of regard for it to matter to him at any sort of level of awareness.

'I'm touched by your trust on my person.' the blonde drawled ironically. 'Lark?'

'I'm a sensory type. All I can suggest is watching it and see how bad it gets with those teeth.' said the man. Both Vulture and Thorny Devil sighed heavily.

'You better be quiet.' muttered the man and slowly started unpacking yet another one of his breakfast's. It seemed that he ate nothing but raw meat as there was no difference in any of them since the day one. As the paper fell off the treat, Gaara stopped chewing on the rope and turned toward the man. Very slowly. Minato immediately grabbed the new cup of warm mint tea and offered it to the baby. And by 'offered' it, it meant he put it straight over his mouth and nose, practically covering half of the baby's face. Caffeine be damned, it wasn't like if that would hurt the baby.

'Okay, new rule, we are all vegetarians from now one and until new order.' he said, not too subtly trying to get the baby to take a drink 'Vulture? Get out of here and make sure you don't come back until you smell like anything but meat, especially raw one.'

The man didn't have to be told twice. He vanished as fast as he could, leaving only a small trail of smell behind. Gaara gladly bit into the offering, making the porcelain crack. But then, he simply pushed it away and kept on staring at the place where a moment ago Vulture sat.

'…da…'

'No, not for biting.' Minato said calmly, as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. He moved the cup around, presenting the uncracked half to the baby again 'Won't you take a sip, Little Red?'

The redhead looked up at Minato, not understanding him, but as the smell still worked for him, he decided to try it a bit again. But once the first sip was down his throat, he bit at the cup again, this time breaking through the porcelain and spilling the tea on Minato's knees. He couldn't help it. The need to try out the new feature was stronger than anything else. Lost in thought, he slowly started chewing on the bits of cup that stayed in his mouth, letting it actually spill out from his face once they were cracked to small bits. Chewing on the thing cups were made of surely felt interesting. Minato made a face. A tired face. Of course the tea wouldn't disgust him, he'd had far worse thrown at him by this very baby before. Lukewarm tea he could deal with.

'No, baby, no biting that…!' he said, reaching to stick his hand into the baby's mouth before realizing what a terrible idea what would be. Instead he used the cadaverous remnants of the rug Gaara had tried to eat to wipe away as much of the shards of porcelain from his mouth as possible. 'Well. Let's get basic rules for living here settled. No meat of any kind, not here, not close. Someone please make sure no vendors so much as pass anywhere near this house, and warn the guards outside and whoever works outside. If anyone starts bleeding from any reason, I want them to teleport as far away as possible.'

Gaara moved his head as far back as possible at the interrupting rug, not stopping for once his chewing, but when he couldn't turn his head away anymore he simply accepted the thing and started including it in the chewing process too. Now, chewing on rug and porcelain together made it a whole new world of physical feelings. All ANBUs nodded curtly. The idea of getting attention of such a mincer was far from pleasurable.

'This will be hard, dry meat and meat overall is one of the most basic foods made around the town aside the pita and hummus…'

'There's market day overflowing with meat every week.' added Thorny Devil and look at Gaara. The kid looked at Minato and coughed lightly, spitting crushed porcelain and torn rug everywhere. 'They kill lambs just a few hours before so the meat wouldn't go bad before the selling…'

'People will have to eat ful medammis and hummus then.'

'Are you stupid? Don't you know how much beans and olive oil costs nowadays?' hissed Thorny Devil. ANBUs looked at her in silence. The girl looked at the ceiling. 'Sorry, stupid question.'

Being the only woman in the group of men surely had disadvantages.

'You don't need to stop eating it, just make sure that you don't eat it here, and make sure nothing in your person smells like meat when you actually come here.' Probably the only one sticking to pure vegetarianism would be him, considering he was the only one who couldn't exactly go out for food. 'Just make sure they stop selling anything related to meat or blood anywhere close to here.'

The blonde gingerly started prying loose cotton threads from the baby's mouth.

'Also, at the risk of sounding male chauvinistic, all ladies from the house are extent from coming to work during 'those days'. I'd rather play it safe until we can figure something out.' He gave Ants a quizzical look. Infertility might be caused by a billion things, but not all of them did ensure the loss of a period. All four girls and Thorny Devil looked at Minato at once, the strength of the movement showing how outraged they were that Minato decided to be such a vulgar obscene pervert to be saying something like that out loud.

'I was about to suggest my leave in upcoming week.' said Thorny Devil, accenting every word with hard Suna accent 'My sister is not feeling too well lately.'

All Ants stayed silent.

'What about feeding the monster?' muttered Lark, looking at his hands like if he didn't want to be here suddenly. Minato briefly considered hiding behind the baby, before deciding all that concentrated killing intent might just make matters worse. What was with women and being so delicate about those things? Periods were a reality of the world; if they didn't want him to mention it they could just say it themselves. This is what he got for being thoughtful.

'I hadn't thought of that.' the blonde said absently, giving up on trying to keep Gaara from munch on weird things and just offering him the thick rope toy again. 'In fact, that's another weird thing, there is no reason the monster should need additional sacrifices, bloodlust isn't hunger and these things don't need food, yet it keeps demanding this…'

He trailed off for a moment.

'When did it tell you it wanted to be fed for the first time?'

'Oh, about that…' muttered Lark, brushing his hand over his neck, seeming to be obviously uncomfortable. 'Well…'

'He didn't tell us.' sounded the voice from behind the turned chair. Daichi obviously was still in the foul mood, but he wasn't doing anything to change his position 'We don't try to communicate with it and it doesn't try to communicate with us. Once in awhile it just grabbed human bodies to strip them out of meat and either devoured it itself or tried to bring it to the host.'

'It imitated humans a lot.' muttered Wren 'Once when he managed to bring it close enough to the kid, he turned into a woman and started eating the body with knife and fork made of sand.'

'Karura-sam…'

'…BUT once we started throwing the sand the meat from our animals.' continued Wren as he closed his notepad quite loudly 'It's stopped doing that. I guess it just wanted meat and hunted what was closer to get. We don't know why. We don't know where it goes and what happens to all ingredients that aren't included in the sand dunes. Maybe somewhere in the desert there's a lake full of proteins where scavengers find their own ristoranto paradise. We only care that he doesn't kill people once we do that.'

'That's…'

Yeah.

So it had been trying to feed Gaara before, just as he had suspected. And now that Gaara had finally grown…

'…when they bring whatever's there to feed it, I guess we'll just have to bear with more of those bombs with smell you used to keep him awake. That should cover it. Then diffuse the smell with whatever's at hand.'

Yet another band aid, but what could they do? It hadn't been smart to do it because now the monster wasn't happy unless he had it's promised pound of flesh, and was quite happy to demand it if it didn't get it, but it had been a short term solution, in his one year of life Gaara had already cost thirty four lives, not counting those he'd crippled to death and ninja who provably hadn't been in a psychological state to turn back to any sort of duties afterwards.

'…all this is just a short term solution.' the blonde said resignedly, looking down at the baby on his lap. Gaara, forever oblivious to the mess he was responsible for, chewed on the rope toy. '…well, we better start working. Wren?'

'Yes, Hokage-sama?' asked the man, looking at his closed notepad. All of them knew that already but what were they to do about it? Gaara slowly tore off the side of the rope and let it fall on the ground. Quietly, he turned toward the table full of white masks and reached out with hand to get put higher. Minato pulled him up so he was cradling him again in arms instead of just letting him sit on his lap, stroking the back of his neck with tips of fingers.

'… I need you to get me the lunar calendar of the past two years, a list with all names, rank and information of all ninja who ever got close to Gaara- please separate them in deceased, wounded and untouched, and make sure it includes everyone present. Include rank, blood type, age, anything that can be used to figure out If there's any connection between them. I need a map of the house and to know exactly on which rooms Gaara's ever been, even if it was for a few moments.'

He turned to the three ANBU.

'I don't know how much chakra the monster expelled on the past used these past days, but I need one of you to go check on Dingo. If he was unaffected, let me know and I'll send a clone, if he's feeling unwell, just get him as far away from Suna as you can and inform me when he's stable. And yes, it matters the measure of how well he feels, I need him to be in perfect condition.'

'That won't be the problem.' muttered Wren and opened his notepad on clear page. Actually, if he knew about it earlier, he would be probably ending it by now. Not that he couldn't make it by the end of the day. He needed to check the stats anyway.

'Isn't Wren working on the same level as Dingo?' muttered Lark, but quieted as Thorny Devil nodded. 'We haven't heard from him for awhile…'

'Consider it done.' said the woman again and sighed. Vulture finally poofed back again.

'What did I miss?' he asked. Gaara looked at him and his eyes widened at least one inch each. 'I hope I did enough, I wasted so much water to clean myself-'

'Bubu!' squealed the kid and did his best to actually get on the surface of the table. 'Ayiieee!'

'Get out.' barked Daichi with more annoyance than threat 'You're free to roll in dirt for the rest of the day. And get back to vegan diet.'

The man poofed out again.

'…all things considered, I think it would be better if your kids stayed at my place with Yashamaru.' What with all the allegories about cats bringing weak prey home for the owner to learn how to bets eat them, keeping the smallest, weakest members if the household away sounded like a smart idea. So far they had been utterly ignored at every chance, but that didn't mean things wouldn't change now he actually had means to go through it.

'…if you'd rather spend some time with them, you can also stay there. If you don't mind sleeping in my bed, I have no complaints. We'll contact you if there's any need.'

As much as he disliked the idea of the Kazekage snooping around his things, the man had stayed them under the Gaara-teething siege, and when he wasn't there he was at the office working. He had no idea when he'd gone and seen his kids last, but unless he knew a jutsu to disrupt space-time, he doubted it had been anytime in the past half month.

'The kids lived without my pressure contact for the last year, they can handle it for a few more months.' muttered the man, finally turning back to the auditorium. 'I would rather not leave my place of work when all depends on it.'

Especially when it came to controlling the kid. He knew that once he would leave them all to take care of Gaara, the house would end up in bigger ruins than usual.

'Yashamaru already confirmed he has great time in your current house and my kids will do whatever I tell them to so you don't need to bother with that.'

Now it was Minato's turn to almost-crack his teeth. Yes. Yashamaru was having oodles of fun in his house, he betted on that.

'As you wish.' he said, forcing himself to shrug nonchalantly. He turned to the turned ANBU mask.

'Devil, I know you'll be busy with your sister next week.' he probably deserved a medal just for the fact he said this with a straight face and not a single ounce of sarcasm 'But are you in the mood for some heavy reading? I'm going to need Wren to help finish teaching me the basics of sealing method, and even before that I never had much time to go through them. I need you to read several of the local legends and check if they might or not even remotely be related to Shukaku. So far the parameters we are using are things related to sand, wind, any sort of monster that eats human flesh, Tanuki and the moon, if you can find anything else they have in common, please let me know.'

'I can do this if Wren let's me inside the local side of the library.'

'That won't be a problem.' muttered Wren again, not rising his head from the already heavy written on piece of paper 'My library is always open to people in need.'

Silence.

'…is that all?' finally piped out Lark, seeming to be too obviously uncomfortable now.

'I'm thinking.' the blonde said, noticing the man's distress but unable to do anything about it. Probably it had to do with what had happened to his wife.

'I don't think I'll need you here immediately, Ants will be more useful. If you can, would you please go talk with the other ANBU and the medics. I need another map of Suna, marking where exactly did the raccoon spill when we stranded it after the sandstorm, besides that…' he bit his lip, frowning in concentration. 'I'm going to need all and any sort of information available about the previous jinchuuriki. That would be… Nidaime Kazekage-sama... and there was one before him, right? He was supposed to be the second jinchuuriki, who was it before him?'

'I will do it…' muttered Lark, but with a bit of distress. Daichi smiled bitterly. Who was it, indeed?

'Winds whisper between each other it was one of the most terrifying creatures that sand dunes held on these grounds before the great Third stepped upon the stool of the kage.' he muttered, propping his cheek on a hand 'They say he was a close friend of sons of Rikudo, a preacher of Ninshu and the most loyal man to the First Kazekage. Or maybe he was Rikudo sennin himself, some believe even that. Of course, we don't even know if this whole sage even existed, right?'

A chuckle. Gaara curiously plopped upon the table and looked at the audition, catching attention of Daichi. Baby, unaware of that, easily slipped away from Minato's hold and looked around, laying on it, then looked back at the man, his eyes wide and pinpointed, obviously showing fear of losing the contact with the man again.

'Anyway, First Kazekage would probably tell you a story about it, but his mouth won't open ever again. The culture of Suna was taken and given from mouth to mouth for a long time before the Second came and even then all his writings are either gone or breached by insanity. All we have is a few legends. The Second Kazekage put his head on the scales for a few words of fairy tale no one believes was true anymore.'

And so did he, but he was not going to apologize or point that out. He at least saw the real jinchuuriki with his own eyes before that and he knew that it was actually possible to squeeze monster into a living human body.

'Winds and sands surely know a lot of stories. 'Monk' was his name. That is all.'

The blonde's whole body tensed, through not in fright. Obviously what the redhead had said was considered relevant.

'…Monk, you say? That's why the call that thing 'monk', then?'

'What thing?' asked Daichi, still observing Gaara. The kid finally decided to lay just where it was as he wasn't very far away from Minato. He tried to lick the table though. 'Monk is the name of possible profession the first jinchuuriki had, his name was forgotten. What are you asking about?'

Minato smiled at him.

'Sealing is said to have come from the teachings of the sage of Six Paths himself.' he said, reaching again to stroke the downy red hair. 'Initially, it was only taught to religious ascetics, all of which were his followers.'

'This is Konoha's legend, I do not know of whether it was true or not. I personally don't believe in monster hidden in the Moon.' said Daichi, moving his eyes toward the blonde 'And Ninshu is very unclear in its own aspects. I think that ninjutsu came more thanks to inheritance of wars that Senju and Uchiha ancestors had between each other but then… what do I know? In Suna it was First Kazekage who already knew everything of his own and he was neither Uchiha or Senju. Where did he come from and why Monk was with him? Who knows? Maybe ashes of people buried underneath us know, but I'm not going to talk with ghosts.'

'Uzumaki's remember such things better, it was traveling monks and priest who taught the first steps and developed fūinjutsu in Uzushiogakure.'

It wasn't something he could solidly rely on, but instinct told him the chances of it being correct were rather high. In the end, sage of Six Paths or not, all the knowledge had to come from someone, and even based on a legend, it wasn't that long ago that what humans could do with seals and chakra were considered miracles. The sealing method was quite different though, so why...

It really was too bad all jutsu designed to bring back people from the death were forbidden.

'At any rate, you can ask Vulture to help you, Lark, thank you for your time. As for Kazekage-sama...'he turned to the older man. 'I need to meet with Chiyo-sama.'

It wasn't something that could be pushed away anymore now. Whether the man wanted it or not, or if he thought Minato would embarrass him, this wasn't something that could be kicked away any longer. The ANBU nodded and disappeared. Daichi frowned upon the words.

'I told you there's no need for you to seek her.'

Minato looked back at him.

'…I have no idea why you are trying so hard to keep me from meeting her. At first I thought it was just because me not knowing Sunnah would make you feel embarrassed for depending on me for this, or maybe that she's another purists and will so much as refuse talking to me unless I prove myself to be a genius, but I'm doing all I can to learn as fast as I can.' The blonde frowned further, looking troubled. 'I don't think I'm doing that bad, am I?'

Was he? He dedicated as much of his attention to working on learning the hard language as it was possible for him to spare, and he'd never fallen behind on the exercises he was given.

'No, you're doing perfect, overly well for a foreign who didn't know what was Sunnah a few days ago. Not that she would care, even if she would obviously notice.' muttered Daichi and looked at Gaara who finally looked back. 'I'd just rather keep you out of the world of this witch.'

The blonde perked a little at the man's words, pleased by the praise. No, he didn't need to be told he was doing well, but it was always nice to hear it.

'Then why?' he scratched Gaara's head again gently 'You think she'll hate me?'

'Hate you?' muttered Daichi, then slowly moved his hand upon his face, smudging his features. 'Oh no, hate is something she only holds for specific people… I'm actually afraid she might like you. This wouldn't end good.'

He looked back at the kid again who tried to look up as high as he could to see what was doing this funny little thing with his head.

'…and there's this.' By 'this' he obviously meant Gaara. 'You cannot walk out with him outside and she won't move out from her cave here no matter what you do or say.'

Minato stared at the man, thinking it was odd, yet somehow fitting the man would think the woman liking him would be some sort of calamity. He had been a little leery about it, especially since some ninja still didn't like people from Konoha over old wounds from the first war.

'I'll think about something. I'm smart, I'm sure I will figure something out in no time.' he said with feigned arrogance. He looked down at the baby, smiled a little and gave the tiny nose a small poke. 'In the meantime, you should at least see if she'd be willing to meet with me. I'll let you think about it while I go see what I can feed Little Red here, he looks hungry.'

For a moment, Daichi looked like a three years old who was told to go wash hands before dinner.

'I will send someone.' he said finally and got up from the chair. 'But I'm sure that she'd like to meet new face even if she'd be dead. Milk is in the unsigned bottle.'

And with one finally look at Gaara, the master and lord of the house had retreated. Baby followed him a bit, then looked back at Minato.

'…otly.'

'Hm? What is it Gaara?' the blonde smiled at the baby, encouraging for any sort of talk the toddler felt like doing as ever. If the woman would agree to meet him that was the biggest issue there could be. How to get there- Well, he had occasional sparks of brilliance. He was sure he'd figure something out sooner or later. 'What did you say?'

Gaara didn't answer to the posed question (obviously), and instead he just looked at Minato with as innocent stare as he could. And then he tried to push his thumb into his mouth.

'…nnn…' he commented that a second later when he tried close his mouth over it and it definitely didn't feel good. He took it out of his mouth and looked at it. A moment later he tried to push there his whole hand.

'Okay, yes, you are hungry, I get it, I get it…' he carefully grabbed the small hand and guided it out of the opened maws. The least he wanted was those creepy teeth around the soft baby skin, even if said baby skin would very likely be covered in hardened sand before there could be any damage. 'Guess we better start you on something a little more interesting than just milk…'

In the end one of Ants helped him make some sort of mutant stew out of milk, oat bran (which were supposed to be super nutritive when Minato wasn't even aware you could eats those) and the ever present milk.

Gaara was more than happy to accept the proposition. Especially as he was given completely new things he could not only chew but also swallow! The problems arose when he started tasting milk though – the thing immediately landed on the floor with a loud protest, soon followed by a dry heaving that seemed to go as an addition to the taste itself. The bottle ended up in shreds. The love that the little redhead held for milk so far got directed into pita bread as soon as he learned that it made crunchy noise once he actually bit at it. Also, it seemed that the furious teeth growth unblocked something in Gaara's mind (was it the shock or physical activity, it wasn't clarified) and he finally started not only make demands in his own language but also started copying the sounds and bits of words that were uttered around him. During the lunch he had actually learned that it was actually much more effective if he called the bread 'ita' instead of 'uunh' and understood that 'mi' wasn't exactly the same as 'mwee' ad brought two different effects. Besides that, Gaara also copied the sound of flying insect and repeated it any time he felt like it and found great joy in uttering sounds of foot tapping when someone was actually crossing the room. Other people didn't really bother, but didn't feel particularly inclined to share joy about this either as each one had their own share of work to do. Wren was almost down the drain with his charts, especially as Thorny Devil rummaged through his pedantic library and he felt torn between telling her to stop and watching her sexy muscles moving under thick ANBU outfit (especially those not-so-very-musclish-muscles, like the ones above the thighs). Vulture actually joined the Lark with his quest of interrogating Dingo, which mostly seemed be composed of him eating raw meat in the hidden corners of the building and Lark trying to get out something from the man who didn't want to open his mouth about anything that touched delicate working matters of his job. Daichi joined the wagon of hard workers and sent some minor genin to ask old hag if she wanted to have guests. And that's how time passed.

Gaara learning to communicate did no short amount of wonders for life in the Kazekage's household, mostly and simply out of the fact it was easier to keep the baby content when one knew what he was asking for. The biggest signs were down already, with the baby calling the tasty flat bread (and by correlation anything edible) 'ita', and being able to clarify when he just wanted normal attention by the very simple 'Mii' and his new and preferred term, 'Up.'

It sadly didn't help with the fact that Gaara had reached new plateaus on terms of oral curiosity and that if it was anywhere around reachable levels for him, it was sure to be brought to his mouth for tasting. That meant that most of the Kazekage's furniture was in a very sorry state. It came to the point it was difficult to tell apart the marks left by Gaara's teeth and those of kunai on the table. In the meantime, Minato was quietly going mad.

So far no accidents had happened and Gaara hadn't tried to eat any of them, but he knew it was a matter of time before something happened and the baby had its first taste of blood and decided humans were a stupendous source for it. Needless to say, this translated into constant paranoia and not daring to so much as close his eyes for fear of what the baby might try to do without constant supervision.

'Maybe you should try to get some sleep, Hokage-sama.' The red Ant, who he'd already singled as the medic said for maybe the umpteenth time.

'Psssh, sacrilegious wench.' he said in a friendly way as he stared fixedly at the symbol he was supposed to copy. It was the very useful active form for 'limited' or 'out of boundaries' and he'd effectively filled half a page with these already. Then the Kazekage had asked him how he'd managed to finish the complicated curves so fast and that's when he'd realized he had no idea of the actual process of how to repeat the symbol. 'Sleep is below my person.'

They acted like if they had never seen a ninja not sleep for a week and a half. So, maybe he was starting to confuse words and provably depending on soldier pills the way he did wasn't going to do wonders for his stomach, but it's not like If he had many options left, right? He had too many things to worry about anyway. Like how they were literally chasing for a needle into the world biggest haystack- was there any way for him to figure out what could be causing the monster to be able to brutally abuse the chakra at its disposal? So far he had no theories, only bits of information he kept trying to work some semblance of association with.

'…What did Dingo say, again?'

'That he is currently healing his damaged ear.' said Lark repeating the same thing again and again. He couldn't understand why the man didn't ask to be moved outside the building if he wasn't needed in place at all. 'He says that currently chakra of the demon cumulated in one place and that it keeps getting channeled through Gaara as usual.'

'Right…' Minato stared at the page of exercises. The page of exercises stared back evenly, evilly, taunting him for his inability to answer- up until Gaara sneaked under his arm and grabbed it into a tiny first, immediately bringing it to his mouth. There you go, half blank page. That's what you get from messing with Namikaze Minato. Let this be a lesson for you and all those of your milk. He patted the baby's head appraisingly. 'Let me know when he's completely healed.'

So far he hadn't seemed to get much information, and they were pretty much grasping at straws. He knew that the more variables he used to make any theory, the harder it would be to close it, but at the same time he needed all of the imputed to reach… well, the truth. And then there was the fact the more things he was told, the more he realized he needed to speak with both the seal master who had been in charge and… well, the Kazekage. But he wanted to talk with the woman first, because if he did it with the man to begin with, he might make her change her version.

'What did Chiyo-sama say?'

'She is dead.' said Daichi with a face that seemed to make him look very angry at the fact that old woman dared to die on him in such important time like this. 'So you can visit her anytime I guess. Of course, not that I allow you to get out with that kid in your arms.'

'Fantastic.' The blonde said morosely, obviously thinking the man was joking- obviously forgetting that the redhead didn't have a sense of humor to draw jokes from. He rested his head on the table, sighing against the cheap wood. His headache seemed to be down in the throes of suicidal depression. Why did it have to be a monster who didn't sleep. Why not a monster who didn't puke? What about one who didn't poop? That would definitely be worth an increment on the rate of toddler jinchuuriki-

One moment he was wondering why did monstrous abominations have to be so complicated, and the next, his body was being shifted, immediately throwing everything into high alarm as he easily powered from where he was and to the tag for teleportation he'd left maybe three or four steps to the left, Gaara safely cradled in his arms.

'What?' he asked, eyes going everywhere and not understanding why did everything look different. Where had Lark gone? 'What happened?'

'Why did you teleport?' asked Lark, looking at him. But then, he shrugged. 'At least you're not sleeping…'

'I thought…' he looked down at Gaara. Baby looked surprised, but otherwise unharmed.

'…I fell asleep.' he sighed, mostly naked shoulders sinking. 'Sorry.'

'Warn us beforehand, we can prepare an hour of watching over you.' said Vulture for a change. 'It's not like you'd be able to get to the cave of elders anytime soon.'

'Warn us beforehand, we can prepare an hour of watching over you.' Said Vulture for a change. 'It's not like you'd be able to get to the cave of elders anytime soon.'

'Fishing pond.' said Wren quietly and others started looking at various spots on the walls, suddenly very absorbed by them. 'It's close to the source of water.'

'I hate your fishing ponds.' the blonde muttered. He sat Gaara on his lap. Gaara rose his hands and uttered the commanding 'up'.

'…this is pointless, I'm going to have to go there personally. How far away is that cave?'

'It's fifty seven degrees on the east in the straight line, so if you jump on the buildings, you get there just as fast as you can reach the end of the town like that.' muttered Wren 'On foot it takes a few hours if you're not in hurry. The town is still not repaired enough.'

'I'm in a hurry. We are all in a hurry.' Minato looked at the ceiling as if it contained the answers to all questions ever asked by humanity. There were no such answers, but there sure was an uneven crack on it from when Gaara had thrown the couch upwards a week ago when he was still teething.

'I'm going out as soon as it's dark. I'm going to be leaving you with a bunch of clones for replacement, and if you need me back you can radio me. I should be within teleportation limits. Questions?'

'Limits.' said Daichi in response 'I want you to be back before morning. If those old people will hold you down, you can as well stay there.'

The blonde nodded, too tired to either be sarcastic, question reason or so much as attempt being humorous about the matter. For all he knew the redhead thought him capable to attempt to navigate the desert without the appropriate equipment, provisions, and more importantly, his son.

'I doubt I'll need to stay too long.' his capacity for attention was provably compromised already. He'd probably just talk and ask whatever came to mind at the moment. He still had no idea what he was doing, just hoping something would call to him and at least give him a gist of what it might be causing it- hell, he'd even take a list of what it might not, if nothing else to start cleaning the increasing list of possibilities. 'Anything I should take with me, or do, or not do, or say, or not say?'

'Do you even know who are you going to meet with?' asked Daichi, looking at him in the eye 'Both yes and no makes you look stupid for posing such question, so better set off already.'

'Seal master and mednin extraordinaire Akasuna no Chiyo-sama.' the blonde said blandly, pausing from his shrugging a long-sleeved shirt that Devil had passed him on to look at the Kazekage 'More than that, no, not at all, since no one has told me anything. As usual.'

Daichi hmpfed in a manner that showed he got actually irritated enough to not answer anything. As it seemed, the subject was rather irky to him.

'Akasuna Chiyo-baa-sama is the closest family Akasuna no Sasori had had since the White Fang did what he did.' whispered Thorny Devil, brushing some invisible speck of dust from the blonde's shoulder.

'I can hear you from here.' said Daichi, his voice filled with anger 'If he doesn't know who was Sasori-'

'We're still searching for him.'

'…who WAS Sasori' said Daichi with pressure, actually squeezing the word with his teeth. 'Then telling him about other successful accomplishes made by some old hag won't tell him a thing either. Who is that blonde noob, can anyone tell me if we really got contracted with ex-Hokage or were we ripped off again by Konoha? Which kage doesn't know people from bingo books and their stories?'

Lark politely coughed.

'Educational system in Konoha doesn't consider matter of Sasori to be that big or important-'

'They don't consider ANYTHING important!' suddenly the man shouted as he started stomping around, not even facing most of people in the room 'When I told them we're missing a kage they blew me off like a raspberry! And this noob here doesn't even know that sticking his hands into unknown cribs can cause lack of fingers! What's happening to this world? When the Third was ruling, Konoha was much more respectable place!'

ANBUs looked down to earth like a bunch of beaten dogs. Daichi looked at them and let out a huff.

'I want to see that disgrace here by the morning.' He said, talking obviously about Minato but not talking to him as he walked away '…soon we will have demented grandpas and women on kage stools! To not know who is Akasuna no Chiyo, what the hell!...'

And with that, his rant quieted down as he walked away. ANBUs still kept looking down at their feet.

'You'd better go.' muttered Wren, for once actually munching on his pencil under his mask instead of writing with it 'When he starts going off about the previous leader, he doesn't stop quickly.'

Important or not, something in the conversation seemed to strike a chord, because the blonde tensed under the female's hand and actually took a step back, eyes going from her to the Kazekage, and concentrating somewhere on a fascinating speck somewhere on the floor.

'Yes. I better be going. I'm sorry-' he gave the ANBU team a look, looked into the adjacent room to make sure his clone still had control of the situation with the baby, then gave Lark the scroll with the backup clone and ran off, not stopping to pick a jacket or looking back.

_Damn it, __taicho. Is there anything you didn't mess up for us?_

He stopped for a moment outside, the full effect of the weather hitting him in the face like a slap- he had waited for the sun to be down, and indeed, there was nothing but the barest of pink on the far east, the first handfuls of stars already twinkling in the sky. Even so, the temperature outside was easily four or five degrees more than inside the house, making him want to take the shirt off. Minato considered for a moment removing it, but it would be bothersome to carry it, and it would take very little for the air to cool down. He'd just bear with it until it happened.

The scattered houses around where generally nicer than the rest of the village, both because given the location they were close to the village leaders (which provably meant they cost a pretty penny) and because most of the disaster had occurred on the northeaster district, far away enough the smell of new clay for the building houses was vague enough as to only be perceived if someone was looking for it. The center of the village, where the remaining homeless where staying was also a certain distance, and since they probably didn't have much to do around here (he doubted the 4th Kazekage, unlike Sarutobi-sensei, took time off to actually listen to villagers complains) no one wondered around. All he saw was the occasionally kids running late from after hours in the academy and a few women in cloths both in richer colors and nicer cuts than the usual potato-shaped dressing most of civilians wore here. He wondered if any of them belonged to the family of someone high in the council.

Given the way they gawked at him as if he were a little rabbit who had just walked out of the lion's den unscratched, it was probably the case. He considered a moment before smiling at them lightly and jumping up to the roof of the nearest building, looking around for the mark Wren had told him. Fifty seven degrees on the east in the straight line…? That would make it down the library, straight line through the Plaza and all the way to the village's doors. Piece of cake.

He looked up at the quickly darkening sky, the moon already showing - disturbingly larger than he'd ever seen it before, just a sliver of an arch, like an opening eye or the mocking, floating smile of some celestial Cheshire cat. Maybe he'd take a small detour down in the plaza and buy a couple meat buns. There was nothing like some solid food to chase away bad omens.

The triangle meat bun he brought was hot, greasy and delicious, despite not knowing what was being used as a filling and not really caring to find out. The sticky juices gleamed on his lip for a moment before he licked it off and swallowed the last bite out of the second one of the night. The run there, detour for food included, had taken him less than ten minutes. The 'cave' the ANBU had mentioned wasn't a cave as much as some really old sort of building, not unlike what the oldest constructions in the village itself looked like.

There was a rock garden, something very zen (and not really rare given the very limited local flora), some stray, colorful Saguaros growing up tall, a few loose goats… and a dead old lady sprawled on the stairs, her neck angled in an odd angle. No traps sprung, no crazy berserker summons jumped at his neck and the woman didn't suddenly get up and the woman didn't try to stick a Kunai into his eye cavity. All things considered, he should have been glad.

'And you are dead.'

Minato threw a pebble somewhere around her hand. It bounced off without any reaction. With a sigh, he leaned closer, sticking a new bun on his mouth and holding it there while he checked her pulse. Her skin was cold, clammy and there was already there were dark splotches on her hands already. When he pressed on one, it didn't change. Probably already like that for several hours.

Not enough for it to get all soft again, but still more than five hours, for sure.

'Well, that's great. That's just awesome- exactly what I need.' he muttered around his mouthful or mysterious meat and cheese. 'Of course you are. Why wouldn't you be? Why would anything ever go my way when I need it to?'

He reached into the package and started with a fourth fatayer.

'It's not like if I'm not enjoying playing nanny to possessed toddler with tyrannosaurs denture, Goodness, or like if I mind having sociopath cross dresser taking care of my baby; and goodness- it's not that I'm not enjoying the Kazekage's extended hospitality, which includes –but it's not limited to- treating me like a slave-slash-personal seal master-slash-pet-slash-nanny-slash-object of depraved lust.'

The last was said with a specially dramatic flair as he stuffed what was left of the bun, as if the notion alone was immensely amusing while at the same time not being it at all. He chewed on it, swallowed, then wiped his hand on his pants.

'Well lady, if you'll excuse me.' he said, giving her a mock salute. 'Since I still have a few hours until my curfew, and you are not going to get any dead-er, I think I'll go raid your liquor cabinet and hope whatever I find won't kill me while I try to figure out why does my karma such so much.'

Turning around, he walked into the house. The kitchen was remarkably easy to find, being as it was on the second room he entered, and since he had enough time to kill, he put some water to boil. Maybe he'd start with some tea. Then he could take a nap, raid that liquor cabinet, plot world domination and kill himself in the Jacuzzi doubtlessly waiting for him somewhere in the depths of unexplored house.

'Um…' A cough behind him. 'What are you doing, young man?...'

'Hmm?' Minato looked up to find an old man who was definitely overdressed if the layered clothes and hat were anything to go by (at least for Minato's standards). He looked to be at least ten or fifteen years older than Sarutobi-sensei, not that was much to gauge anyone's age in here, not to mention how Sandaime-sama looked much younger than he really was.

'Oh, sorry.' he said, shaking the dull paralysis that had seemed to envelop him and giving the older man a bow. 'You must be Chiyo-sama's brother. My name is Namikaze Minato. Kazekage-sama arranged for me to come here today.'

'…oh, the Third is still trying to send us maids?... That frivolous brat…' said the man in a weak voice, actually shaking like a leaf on the wind, even if there was really no reason for him to rattle like that 'I must tell sister, she likes to see new faces once every ten years… where are you, sister?… Third is sending you a new young, handsome and beautiful man…'

'Uh… actually I'm not- I'm-' Minato stopped, wondering why was he even trying to make excuses for himself. He wasn't a maid- he was a babysitter. New, young, handsome and beautiful man-babysitter who provably looked like crap thanks to weeks of not sleeping and no direct contact with any sort of sunlight. It wasn't worth the correction. 'Actually, never mind…'

He should probably follow the man and tell him his sister had fallen down the stairs and broken her neck, but since the man was also a shinobi and a man, he'd probably like his privacy to mourn. Also, his tea sounded like if he was just about to start boiling. He was given whole ten seconds to take care of that as after that a loud and very troubled voice of the man followed from the outside.

'Oh no, are you dead, dear sister? Oh no, she is definitely dead!... What an unfortunate thing! Such bad luck!...' could be heard and then silence followed. A moment later the man was inside again. 'Oh my, she surely died, my poor sister… now she won't get to see this new, young handsome maid who just made us tea… what a shame…' Then the man turned to look at the cup Minato held in his hands. 'That's for me? Oh thank you…' he muttered as he simply took both the mug and the kettle away and went inside the house.

'You are welcome…' the blonde said, following after the old man. Sure, all his hopes were dashed, but maybe he knew where the hell the woman kept her annotations? Maybe someone in the ANBU department of intelligence would be able to decode them if they were in code.

'Would you like a meat bun?'

'Of course.' said the old but definitely feminine voice as the piece of fatayer was taken away from Minato's hands. A moment later a very obvious slap on the butt followed, impossible to mistake with anything else but sexual harassment. 'Man, that's some fresh bones, I like'em that way!'

Ebizo looked back and smiled a bit with his toothless mouth.

'Dear sister, you're alive!...' he said with some visible relief. The very undead Chiyo nearby Minato laughed loudly.

'Of course, how could I miss out slave-slash-personal seal master-slash-pet-slash-nanny-slash-object of depraved lust show and tyrannous monstrosities with denture problems, ho ho ho!'

Minato squeaked at the slap- quite strong, with under layer of grope included, and he fumbled with the bag before he dropped it on the floor. It actually reminded him uncannily of Kushina and- oh yeah. He was so not going there.

'Oh, um- hello.' He said, looking down at the diminutive old woman, whose skin looked as fresh as someone her age could look, and definitely lacking any sort of livor mortis 'You are alive.' A beat 'And you are Akasuna no Chiyo-sama.'

That seemed to be the right thing to say, because he immediately left the grease-spotted bag on top of the stone table and gave her a full, formal bow.

'Excuse me, I'm Namikaze Minato, sannin Jiraiya's student. It's an honor to meet you.'

'Eeh, Jiraiya?...' said Chiyo while munching on her treat with a bit of thought 'I think I heard about it somewhere, but where?...'

'Dear sister, wasn't he one of this group of funny kids that wanted to save or destroy the world?...' added Ebizo. Chiyo swallowed the bite, then rose her eyebrows high.

'Oh yeah!' she said as she bit into another one 'That reminds me… Jiraiya, that brat that travelled with this slimy squirt and flat-chested girl… ah, Tsunade…'

Her glare suddenly stopped being so welcome. She swallowed another bite and turned on her heel as she wore her usual cap.

'Princess Tsunade sends me a maid, that's grand!...' she said as she scooped a wire and hook on a stick 'Time to go fishing, ho ho ho!...'

'Uhm… flat… chested…' Minato shook out of his fan boy glow long enough to look at his own chest, rising his hands upwards and positioning them as if he were holding something to it-let's say melons. That didn't seem to do the trick, before he frowned and held them a little further apart, so it looked like if he were measuring watermelons now. Or maybe award winning pumpkins.

'…I don't think we are talking about the same Princess Tsunade.' he said, shaking his head as he let his hands drop.

'Yeah, pretty much the same!' said the woman as she looked at her made up object and started trotting away to another room, quite empty with a big hole of water in the ground 'Why are you here, to steal my recipes? There's no way I'm letting you know them, Tsunade can wrinkle her forehead off!' said the old lady. Then she simply plopped into her spot and started wetting the naked hook in the very clear and empty water. 'You won't spy out single thing from me, even if you're pretty! Not naked enough!'

'Actually, I haven't seen Tsunade-hime for over a year now.' the blonde said, quickly following the lady. He blinked at the 'naked' comment, lips quirking a bit into a small smile- apparently this old lady was an actual normal human being unlike the rest of the population in the country.

'And whatever you explained about medicine wouldn't stick with glue- I'm afraid I have no talent for anything related to healing, much less how it works. I'm here on regards of Gaara-sama.' he said, reverting to formal honorifics 'I thought Kazekage-sama told you about this?'

'Kazekage-sama?' said Chiyo and for once turned her face toward Minato, looking quizzically at him, like if he suddenly spoke in another language. Ebizo, who had slowly trotted his way to the other side of like had suddenly lit up on his face with delight.

'Oh, the Third!... He is such a funny kid!...' he said in a humored voice. Chiyo huffed like a very old granny cat that had given birth to more kittens than she could count to and caught more mice than one grown up human district could amount to.

'The Third is on a trip, you old bag, get it over your head.' she said as she impatiently started swinging her stick, making the water ripple 'That stupid grandson of mine, he is still walking on this world alive? One would think that his kids would eat him up alive for all he did, stupid Daichi. No, the great Kazekage-sama hadn't told us cause he is on a trip and Daichi hadn't told us either. Is the jinchuuriki again acting up? Not that I care, it's not my concern since at least four years or so.'

'Ah, funny kid, funny…' muttered Ebizo, still laughing to himself.

It was sad to admit it took a rather long time for Minato to be able to process what was happening, since the pair of siblings kept referring to different timeframes, once that included the missing kazekage that had stemmed the lovely war years ago, and another where the woman said something or other about her grandson who couldn't possibly be the same Fourth Kazekage because the woman had just admitted herself he wasn't the Kazekage and even if he were, for sure he wouldn't have 'Daichi'. Surely no one from Suna, who obsessed with dates and meaning of words and such things would have never chosen such an ill-befitting name for such a man?

Sabaku no Daichi? Maybe it did have a nice ring to it but it being the Kazekage's birth name…? No. It baffled the mind. That's why he gripped to the only thing he had a clear grasp of.

'But… Gaara isn't even a year old yet…' he said slowly after several seconds 'I don't think even the little lady was born four years ago…'

Temari for sure couldn't be a day over four…

Chiyo once again looked at Minato with quizzical look.

'Four, half, what does it really matter?' she said as she swung the stick lightly 'Do you really expect me to remember such stupid things as birthdays of all kids that Daichi gave life to? I'm an old lady fishing in a pond in the middle of the desert, give me a break!'

At that, she swung her stick once again. If there really were any, even invisible fishes in this pond, she was surely not going to have nice catches anytime soon.

'But they surely don't come to visit us, right, sister?...' said the man, for a change sitting as still as a stone, only his head moving lightly up and down 'That blonde haired boy and that oldest son…'

'It was a blonde girl and the son wasn't the oldest, you old bag.' said the woman, a bit impatient 'You're so sclerotic it takes my life away!'

'Oh no, sister, please, don't die, don't die…' murmured the man, more in a sleepy tone than actually concerned. 'What would that blonde boy and his sister say…'

Minato kept trying to process the fact this woman was the great-grandmother of the little lady, the little cat and the Little Red… which by force made her the Kazekage's grandmother. How old did that make her? The man didn't look that old and he actually wasn't, but still it baffled the mind!

'Would you like to come back with me for a visit?' he asked automatically, still trying to wrap his mind through the fact the Kazekage had sent him to meet this _granny_ 'Both Temari-sama and Kankuro-sama are staying in my house right now.'

'Oh no, no, young man…' said Ebizo, waving his hand lightly 'We're too old, it's too much for us to travel.'

'Speak for yourself.' said the woman, but she didn't do anything to indicate that she was leaving 'If they don't want to visit, why should we care? It's not like if we have real connections with third or fourth generation… you will see when you will have your own to shun away.'

'Well, you live some distance from the village, I guess it's not very safe for the young heirs to travel here?' the blonde theorized absently. 'I think I would like to meet my grandchildren, er- great-grandchildren if I had them.'

He thought about it for a moment, then slowly leaned his back against the wall.

'Then again, the second one is a hellion. I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't want to meet him. The princess is the cutest hypochondriac in this side of Wind country and Gaara's actually very sweet and well behaved when he isn't busy mashing humans to pulp or growing denture worth a baby piranha.'

The old lady looked back at Minato with a mighty frown, that seemed to run more or less around the faces that weren't covered with masks, then she quietly turned back to look at the surface of the lake. This time water didn't ripple for a second.

'Yeah, definitely their own parents' kids.' she muttered, but this time it sounded much more gravy than her speech until now. Ebizo only quietly nodded his head and they stayed like that for a few more long quiet seconds. Then the old lady turned to the blonde again, once again with quizzical look on her face.

'A hellion, you say?' she muttered, once again back to her previous tone 'A hypochondriac? In Suna?'

'Well, the princes seems to be convinced Gaara exhales toxic waste and anything around him needs to be decontaminated; she won't eat anything she isn't sure how was prepared, much less anything the second one tells her is full of bacteria – which he's always doing. Other than that, she's a sweetheart. Second one is always trying to bully his sister, sticking his nose where he shouldn't and seems to have poor sense of preservation because he insists on trying to scare his younger brother. Which of course isn't a very smart idea.' Minato nodded to himself a moment. '… I guess he's also cute, what with that kitty hat. And the make up.'

'A boy with a make up? That's unheard of.' said Chiyo, looking into the pond. The string lightly jumped, like if the fish actually caught it, but she didn't react to it. 'And to have a hypochondriac girl straight in line from the generation of greatest herbalists! That's such a shame!'

Ebizo once again nodded his head. With the way he did, he was starting to resemble old turtle more and more.

'What is Daichi doing with those kids? It's almost like if he forgot where his head is, that brat.' String jumped again, this time harder. Chiyo ignored it all the same. 'Knowing him, that's not impossible. Since he got his head full of jinchuuriki, he forgot where he was living at all once! Is there no one to take care of those poor souls? I always knew that those twins couldn't be trusted, alive or not… ugh!'

This time the string obviously tore at the old hands, but the woman caught it with no less grace than a young girl and took it out from the lake. A very smooth and very shining fish jumped on the end of it. By the way it's fins were covered with ice and snow, it couldn't possibly be from the current pond, unless Suna held fauna from Mist underground. Ebizo smiled lightly and rose his own stick, something very green flashing lightly just under the surface. He didn't take it out though, letting the stick fall gently into the water again.

'Those eels of salty waters.' he muttered with toothless lips 'Not very meaty and stink of old grass.'

'You still remember how grass smells like, old bag?' asked Chiyo, watching her prey for a second, and then throwing it back into the pond, where it disappeared right under the surface 'Anyway, take care of my fishing rod, I need to pay a visit to certain genetic failure of mine and straighten some RNA up.'

'Of course, of course…' muttered Ebizo. His neck's skin jingled on every nod he made. Chiyo looked at Minato and waved him off altogether, going to the nearest bag that had been hanging on the wall.

'Come with me, I need someone to tell me where is that mansion again.' she muttered as she went out through the front door, right into the gardening fields where she started picking up things, from pecks of flowers to little glass bottles hidden in puddles of water or in dark fertile ground (not thicker than a small finger though, sand looked through every hole just like everywhere else). 'Who are you anyway? I don't remember servants having such delicate soft fingers as you.'

'I'm Namikaze Minato.' the blonde said for the third or fourth time in the night, not seeming to mind in the slightest about the woman's absent mindedness, as he highly suspected it to be feigned. She had already recognized him as Jiraiya's pupil and related to Tsunade, so her wits were obviously around. Her brother, he wasn't so sure, but the woman did. If she knew who he really was… well, that he wasn't so sure. And if she didn't, all the better for him, he didn't like how people looked at him and whispered behind his back.

'Gaara kidnapped me so I'm trying to see if I can fix his seal so I can move two steps away from him without being torn to pieces.' he paused to give the old woman a smile. 'He's very affectionate. Do you need some help with that?'

'You boys keep your hands off the woman's playground and all will be all right.' said Chiyo, actually slapping his hands away once she turned around. She looked at him for a moment, then pursed her wrinkled lips and went back to picking up her things 'I do believe that jinchuuriki would get fond of your particular meaty side, that's right, but in such case you just need to keep very far away from him and nothing bad will happen, at least not to you. I don't see why would you want to meddle with old seals for that.'

'It's a long story- no, wait, it isn't.' he quickly shook his fingers in an effort to make them stop smarting 'The baby is like a kicked puppy, and I'm an idiot that picked up a crying baby. I'm the only person who was ever nice to him so now he wants that, all the time, twenty-four hours a day, nonstop. He won't let me put him down, and when I do, it gives Shukaku rights to use the whole village as playground…'

He took the bag of the woman regardless of her previous complains and held it out for her to keep filling it with whatever she wanted. Old fashioned and sexist or not, he was the man here, so that made him the mule pack by default.

'Then he started teething, and it was hell, but then Shukaku made him grow big, sharp, pointy teeth all at the same time, and we are basically in a countdown waiting for him to try to eat someone. By the way, do you have something to take the smell of the meat buns off? We both need it.'

'Boy!' was the answer as old hands threw some very strongly smelling leaves at his face 'Why in the name of the god of shinobi did you pick a crying jinchuuriki? He is no way a kicked puppy, he is a fleshed out monster that only cannot say 'I will kill you' only because no one taught him yet. Maybe some part of him strives for motherly love, but you surely don't look like someone who can give him a breast.'

With that she stopped and actually straightened up, clapping her hands lightly. Then she glanced at the blonde and took his bag with the roughness that seemed to exist in everyone here, including children over the age of ten.

'Thanks, but my back is well, unlike some old bags that cannot stop complaining about it.' she said, flickering her eyes for a moment at the east, where very clouded and very well hidden rocky mountains shone. 'It seems you're in deep trouble then, so maybe we should try thinking about how to make your chest produce milk then.'

'Silly me, I must have been looking somewhere else when the glowing sign saying 'do not feed the jinchuuriki' shone bright.' he said, sighing and rubbing the leaves on his hands and shirt to make sure every last bit of smell was off. 'To me, he was a crying baby. And he *is* a very sweet baby, regardless of what you or anyone else might think.'

He didn't sound angry, more like tired, which he was. Exhausted, really- he didn't want to think about how many times he had repeated the same argument, everyone still treated like if he were crazy and trying to communicate with a rock. Why couldn't people see that Gaara responded to some normal treatment? He wouldn't be so clingy if they hadn't locked him in a box for the first half of his life. And for sure it wasn't Shukaku that wanted to be stroked and who wouldn't eat his soup if he didn't see Minato blow on it exactly two times before offering it to him.

'…Gaara isn't a monster, he's just a baby who just happens to have a monster inside. And since people have gotten out of their way to make sure he has as little human contact as possible, big, crazy and overweight is taking the job of teaching him.'

He pocketed the leaves, thinking it would be better to keep them around in case he happened to need them in the future, Gaara's sense of smell was as sharp as could be expected from a grown up ninja, and provably even more. Then he looked down at her.

'And your back might be straight as a board, but you are still a lady and chivalry isn't dead where I come from.' he extended his hand. 'Please let me carry the bag or I might have to carry both you and it to heal my wounded honor.'

'Yeah, possibly.' said the old woman, tossing the bag at the blonde with outstanding ease in comparison to her previous behavior 'I wouldn't know, I saw him once in my life and he wasn't epitome of babyness then. Be sure to not rattle it or you'd be testing it all on yourself.'

With that, she gave the blonde one more look and simply walked out into the open. By this moment of the night, the moon had been out in full bloom (as much as it could've considering it was almost hidden from the human's eyes) and countless myriads of stars that seemed to shun every possible beauty ancient buildings held around them.

'Madam, I'll have you know I carry the dubious honor of having bested each and every bet ANBU put against my person dying weeks ago.'

Minato smiled and dutifully took the bag. This old, deceitfully fragile-looking lady definitely wasn't what he'd envisioned when his sensei had mentioned her, but he couldn't help but like her. She reminded him of his old nanny a bit.

'And thank you, the masculine honor system is very serious busyness in Fire country.' he said with humor and some of the easy charm that had characterized him not too long ago 'This act puts me one step closer to exchanging my 'masculinity points' for a brand new toaster.'

'If you still need toaster on desert then I'm starting to doubt your past.' said the old woman again, this time kicking slightly the puddle of dust 'But since you're such a gentleman I'm going to let it slide. Nowadays men aren't what they used to be when I was young. Now…'

There hadn't been even half of a breath made when the old woman suddenly jumped up and caught Minato by the collar, making him bend down toward the old face.

'…why is that ungrateful blood waste of mine sending a help to my quarters just now? Is this linked in some way to how ground slipped a few days ago?'

Given the size difference, Minato had to bend a lot, and more than bending it was a matter of doubling himself around the waist completely so he was at eye level with the diminutive female.

'…it did start with Gaara kidnapping me, but since I'm good at seals, I decided to give a try to see if I could fix whatever was wrong with the one holding Shukaku. I offered, and Kazekage-sama agreed to hire me. That's what I've been working in the past two or three months.'

For a moment he stared at the woman from this position, but it being so uncomfortable, he crouched down to her height instead of trying to pry her hands off. It was early, still, he had all the time in the world to waste and no intentions of getting back so soon unless he had very specific reasons for it.

'Actually, what I have been doing is learning Sunnah, since the bijuu won't respond to anything else. We have managed to figure some good seals to limit the bijuu's power since, but this new problem with his teeth has made things a bit more, well… in need of immediate fixing. Ever since it forced Gaara to grow them –all at the same time- it's been rather quiet. Maybe it tired itself, hell if I know.' a shrug 'Either way, we need something better than what we have been working with so far. That ground shifting was Shukaku- last time it tried to eat the village-um, well… It's a long story. A group of ANBU and I used its own chakra to ground it in place. But what we are trying to stop now is it using the village like it's private toy ant farm every time Gaara sneezes too hard- it's wrong, you know? There's no way the monster should have that kind of power without outright killing Gaara, but even then…' he blinked 'I'm sorry, I can't follow myself, I haven't slept in two weeks. Can I start from the beginning?'

The old woman kept on watching the blonde through the whole speech, her lips only going a bit more up in harsh disapproving look and eye closing in a manner that could be seen somewhere before, but surely not in anything Daichi sported off. In the end, she had let go of his clothes and only kept watching him, as the wind lightly fluttered the dust around them.

'You know, sonnie…' she muttered in the end as she moved her gentle wiry hand upon the blond locks '…you deserve a cookie.'

And with that, a few pieces of brownish squares landed on Minato's knees, looking vaguely normal for traditional Suna cuisine.

'Let's get moving then!' she said as she turned around to continue on her path, without really commenting what she heard; whatever ran through her head about the news also stayed close by to her head so far 'I'm not going to live forever and it would be good to see how my three great-great-great-grandkids are doing within all this mess.'

Minato inspected the little squares with curiosity, only to turn and stare at the woman when she suggested visiting her grandchildren.

'You'll go see Temari-sama and Kankuro-sama?' he asked, only to break into a wide, happy smile at the affirmative. 'That's… That's wonderful! I haven't seen Naruto in weeks…' he trailed off, quickly pocketing the cookies in one of the multiple pockets, picking again the bag earning him the manliness points and grabbing the lady delicately by the hand, started practically dragging her in the village's direction.

He got to meet the great hermit Akasuna no Chiyo (confirmed to be the Kazekage's granny), unwittingly convinced her to leave her hole and return to the village for help and he also would get to see his son in the same night! Maybe things were finally starting to look up.


	18. 8 and 10

Despite wanting to get going as fast as possible, Minato eventually slowed down to a light trot, rather than hurrying. In the end he did have a little over two months worth of information to share with the old lady, and since she was someone whose opinion he needed both as seal master and medic, he didn't try to hide anything.

This meant that besides telling her exactly how he had gotten into this situation and how he had more or less been forcefully made to stay in the redhead's house, the narration included everything that had gone inside the house immediately after he had sealed Shukaku in the village.

He specified about Gaara's autistic reaction to have the Ichibi away from his psyche, and the monster's mocking comments to all of it. He told her what had happened when Gaara had started teething and how the monster had freaked out thinking the pain in Gaara's gums meant he was being wounded by some outside force, and how threatening it with permanent sealing had seemed to work, despite the fact the monster seemed to care little and nothing about sealing methods that weren't in its language of preference.

More importantly, he told her about what had happened in the bathroom all those weeks ago, how one ANBU had literally been swallowed into some sort of portal while the other female was still in the hospital. They had somehow managed to remove all of the… flowers growing in her veins and she had recuperated her health, but she had resigned ANBu shortly after claiming not to remember anything, and Vulture had told him she'd started drinking and had to be admitted in the hospital twice already due drug overdose. Given how in Suna there was no shortage of these and that most shinobi knew how to measure them, this was no laughing matter. She kept insisting on the fact she hadn't seen anything while briefly getting into the place. Since she also kept regularly slashing at her skin and saying she could still feel the plants growing inside of her even though there was no doubt it wasn't so, Minato doubted this was the case.

Chiyo had been only listening to it in silence, nodding briefly to what was said, frowning from time to time over the more gruesome parts. It's been so… chaotic, but at the same time grand – how many things passed her once she decided to resign her public duty and just take care of her own garden and nothing else. It had been both a curse and a blessing as it seemed – good choice saved her the nervous breakdown that probably had to happen to most of people living here during such hard times, but then, she really couldn't tell she connected to many of those things. Surely, the tales about how 'Gaara' (she still wasn't used to that name, even after so much time) went through pain of loneliness sounded more or less familiar, but then, so was his hostile behavior, and that one she knew better as she lived long enough to actually walk hand in hand with Second Kazekage (not like that, but then… some things were better left in the past). She also knew that duty of ANBU was tiring and dangerous and there was nothing weird in the behavior of Spider female – but then, flowers in her veins? She couldn't really imagine the whole bathroom incident, she couldn't tell what was Ichibi's prerogative as the monster kept his behavior muffled and hidden and most of all, she couldn't understand where was Daichi in all of this. As the Kazekage he should have been one of the center points of the said story, but from all she noticed it was that he kept hiding in his office and avoiding responsibility altogether. That was not going to end good.

She didn't really know how she could help the situation. It's been half of year since she had cut off her ties from her wrongdoings and she didn't really grow smarter since then.

At least she could see the youngest products of her DNA through generations.

'You're surely a silly boy for getting into all this mess Suna kept on trying to hide under the carpet, but I think nobody else would be able to shoulder it like you.' she said finally and slowly chewed on a cookie with her toothless mouth 'We will see what can I do, but don't expect old bag of bones to be worth much.'

'Well, I really don't think I would have picked him up if I had known what he was.' Minato said, paying for the packet of tea and the snacks he had stopped to get. They were overpriced, like everything in the village was, but as many problems as he currently had, money was not one of them. Besides, he wanted to get something for the ANBU quartet who had been stranded in the place for as long as he had, even if he had no idea how he was going to make them accept it.

Of course, if the Kazekage was still there, he'd say it was just something he got for the older woman, but since the man would probably be holed somewhere in his office or collapsed in his room for some (begrudgingly admitted) deserved rest, he figured he could get away with it without complaints. If not, he'd just wait until paperwork claimed him.

'But I'm not… I like Gaara. I think he can be taught to be a normal kid - as normal as his situation allows it. But he needs to learn not to be so clingy, and no one can be raised with everyone waiting at his back and call to do anything he wants. He'll turn out an insufferable brat, and it won't be long now until he figures he can get anything he wants so long as he threatens to hurt something or someone.'

He twitched a bit, remembering how Gaara had so casually tried to strangle Lark when he'd taken too long to give him a bottle. It had been too calculating, too deliberate to be just Gaara, and at that point he had been very influenced by the monster, but how long until he actually started rationalizing that was the way to go when he wanted things done?

'He needs some sort of limits. And we can't do that unless we can keep measure of the damage he does. I'm amazed at the way this village can stay more or less in one piece after all that's gone through, but the people here don't deserve to live every moment wondering if their houses are going to be sunk because it's too hot or his food had too much seasoning.'

'It's more than obvious, kids need to be held on short rope.' said Chiyo, blinking a bit as she entered the house they've been going to. Smell of the paint was unexpected by the least 'But tell me how to not spoil a jinchuuriki that can bite your head off if he is not held in a cage… being a demon and a well raised baby excludes itself. One more reason why I was against it from the beginning… hello.'

The last word was forwarded at the big frog who seemed to be busy trying to remove paint from the clothing. Two kids, one a bit older blonde girl and younger brunet ran around within the cloud of giggles, until they had noticed her and stopped.

'Um…' started Temari.

'Uncle!' shouted Kankuro instead 'Some old woman came through front door!'

'Be more respectful, Kankuro.' Minato said gently, letting said 'old woman' through and closing the door behind both of them. 'This is Chiyo-sama you are talking about. Hello you two.' he added, finally giving the pair a small smile. 'Have you been having fun?'

For all answer his summon turned around to glare at him and pointed at the broken praying beads scattered all over the place.

'You owe me.' it grumbled around its pipe. 'I am not a babysitter, Minato! I you're your weight in the most luscious fireticks you can find as payment for this.'

Minato made a face at the mere mental image of the fat, crawly parasites. This seemed to please the creature, because he gave his shinobi a wide, evil smile in return.

'Yesss… handpicked and chosen, only the best of the best!'

'Gross…' Minato shuddered a little and turned back for the kids. 'Has Naruto been too much of a handful?'

'Chiyo-sama?' muttered Kankuro, looking at old lady suspiciously 'Like Chiyo Chips?'

The woman just eyed him and started cackling lightly under her nose. Temari conveniently said nothing.

'Like father like son.'

'Sure thing!' said Kankuro immediately, puffing up his chest proudly, even if what was said wasn't exactly a compliment 'And baby had been cool, uncle is feeding it now.'

'Naruto is funny.' said Temari finally, looking at Chiyo with a bit more carefulness 'I l ike him more as a young brother.'

'Aw, thank you little lady, that's very sweet of you to say.' Minato said, reaching to pat her. When she pulled away in horror, he just sighed and pulled back with rolled eyes - of course, he hadn't sanitized himself yet. Maybe after some water and fire…

'I got you two a little something as a thank you for taking care of Naru-' he said, giving each a carefully wrapped cookie. It had a funny name, but as far as Minato was concerned, cookies were cookies and that was it.

'And what did you get me? You got me my ticks, boy?'

'No, I got you tobacco, happy now?'

This indeed seemed to make the summon happy, considering he quickly dove head first into the grocery bag and started rummaging through the contents, the bag distorting in different shapes until he emerged triumphantly with the packaged prize.

'…maybe I'll forgive you this time.' the toad said, smiling lightly as it gave a long sniff at the dried leaves inside. Just the stuff. You didn't get cheap with your summons.

'My heart rejoices.'

Kankuro's eyes lit at the package given, but he immediately covered it with annoyed face, most likely trying to act cool and composed.

'Bah, only one?' he said, weighting it on his hand like if it was merely worth touching 'I eat such at home daily, and I eat five of them at once! Seven even! You're cheap!'

But before anyone could do anything, he hid it under his coat and quickly scurried away. The girl on the other hand thanked Minato with a light bow, but she held it on her reached hands, just the way she had gotten it. It was obvious that she wanted to get it but didn't know how to act about possibly contaminated paper and unknown filling.

'Here, give it to old granny.' said Chiyo, seeing how torn apart the girl was and she quickly brushed it off with a very oily gray flower petal. Thanks to that, the air in the room immediately was filled with smell resembling old hospital rooms that was probably long forgotten in modern Konoha, but a daily routine in Suna. The wrapper came off smoothly. 'Here, all cleaned.' said the old lady and gave it to Temari. Girl looked at it and then reached out her hands for the flower petal, not touching the piece of kleicha yet. Chiyo quietly cleansed her hands also and left the item within her hands. That finally seemed to calm down the girl.

'Thank you—' she said and made a movement to run out after her brother, only to head on with legs of Yashamaru. It didn't stop her from resuming her path. The blond looked after her, his smile pleasant and even more charming than usual.

'Ah, Chiyo-baa-sama!' he tweeted, almost chirped in a girlish squeal '…I knew I recognized this deathly odor from somewhere.'

It was only a blink of an eye when his facial expression fell into his bitter state, but a well trained eye could catch it without a problem. It wasn't possible to say if Chiyo noticed, but even if she did, she kept it to herself.

'It's nice to know you're in good health, Yashamaru.' she said and came to the closest armchair just as quietly as quickly. 'I didn't know you've had the child while I was gone.'

The blond's smile only widened in charm and actually lost some of fake aura once he turned his eyes into a blond bundle he held in his arms.

'He seems like he could be mine, right?' he muttered and slowly caressed yellowish strands 'Say hello to the oldest woman in Suna, Naruto.'

Naruto always eager to please; turned to gift the woman with a wide smile that showed two fully developed canines and a pair of lower and upper incisive well on the development stage. The smile came coupled with a happy crow and two raised arms.

'Naru!'

Light blue eyes turned to source of the voice, twisting over Yashamaru's shoulder a little. For a moment, nothing happened, and Minato felt like if every single inner organ between his throat and stomach had decided to be painfully constricted in a space roughly one fourth of the original area it occupied.

Then the recognition flashed on the toddler's face and he let out shrill shriek of delight, toppled with exited 'running' straight on Yashaamru's arms.

'Ada! AieieeeEEEEeee! Da! Da da da da da~!'whatever garbled rest came out showed that Naruto had picked up several new sets of vowels, most of which included heaps of exclamation points. Yashamaru looked at him for a moment with blank stare and then simply threw him at Minato, no more no less – volleyball style. The movement seemed to be done thoughtfully to make the kid land directly in Minato's arms, but the execution lacked any sort of delicacy a child might have needed for that.

'I will make tea.' he said even before Naruto landed on Minato and marched out of the room, soldier style.

Minato would have been delighted to grab him by the head and maybe rub it against the walls until he ran out of skin to play with for that. Unfortunately he was too busy with a very happy bundle of blond who not only immediately plastered himself to him. Unlike Gaara, who even before learning the meaning barely used a handful of words, Naruto had an extensive narrative of made up language, which was used extensively while he practically climbed to his father's face, took all of ten seconds to sniff like a curious puppy to accurately summarize that yes, this was indeed his very own Da…

…and proceed to try to eat Minato's face in sheer delight from the discovery.

'Ow… ow! Naruto! Yes, yes, I'm happy to see you too…'

'Charming kid.' said Chiyo, observing everything so far from her armchair in silence.

'Ah, yes… Sorry, he's… He's very energetic-ow… just like his mother.' Finally managing to put the baby a little lower from trying to gnaw on his chin, Minato used a free hand to wipe the drool off his face. 'Chiyo Sama, meet Naruto Uzumaki. Naru, say hi to Chiyo-sama.'

'Aa!'

'Hello there, squirt.' said the old woman and then threw another one of her light cookies right so it would end around Naruto's chest, so he could pick it himself. 'A sweet vitaminized bomb, a dream of every kid. I guess you could call me Dear Lady once you decide to communicate, but 'aa' will be all right for now too.'

Naruto looked down at whatever had hit his chest and carefully picked the cookie up, turning it around for a moment, then bringing it up to sniff. Whatever he got from it seemed to be good enough, because his eyes widened and his breathing up speed up as he gaped at the treat life if he had been given a free pass to candy land from it.

He 'oohed' at it, widely gestured down at it in what obviously was a baby version of '.God, did you see what she just gave me?' before putting about half of it in his mouth, fingers holding it included, and started gnawing at it, 'nomnom' sound effect feature included. Minato cuddled him. He had forgotten how… lively and active and Kushina-like Naruto was.

'Daddy missed you, baby~'

'Nom.'

'You're both welcome.' said Chiyo and immediately put small pill into the cup of tea Yashamaru almost threw in front of her, despite his offended look. He didn't seem to be bothered when the liquid changed color from green to light violet and slowly crystallized toxins into the hard crystals just at the surface. 'Now, that we have the drinks ready…' she muttered, fishing the crystals with tea spoon and throwing them away behind her, where they rolled quietly on the floor 'Let's just enjoy what we have left. I assume you want to speak more openly about everything once we reach the true destination of this journey.'

'Yes, sorry for the detour, I-' Naruto tugged on his shirt. '-technically we can't talk much outside-' a harsher tug, this time from his necklace '- and all notes a-ow! Naru!'

Since previous efforts to gain his father's attention had failed, Naruto (who certainly had enough 'will of fire' to let everyone in the house borrow), had finally decided to drop the subtleties and grabbed one of the overgrown strands of yellow that was so conveniently resting next to his face and yanked with all his mind, coupling it with a war-cry.

'What, Naru? What do you want?'

Naruto giggled at him for a moment, twisted on his grip and pointed at Yashamaru.

'La.'

'…you want to go with… Yahamaru?' Minato said this very slowly, as if they were the most unpalatable of destinies one could be served. It also seemed to go straight over Naruto's head, because all he did was point at the mednin again and repeat the same word.

'La.'

Yashamaru looked at both of them, and without another word he vanished into the kitchen. Chiyo conveniently drank a sip from the up of her tea and slapped a hand that tried to sneak out from under the table at Minato's cup. Naruto didn't seem to like this at all, before he looked after the man's back for a moment, and when it disappeared, settled from calling him back at the top of his lungs. This time the man appeared , handling a tray full of homemade bread that probably had to be done in there somehow, even if the house didn't have half a size of oven that kept on standing in kage's kitchen.

'What is it, Naruto?' he asked, his voice saccharine sweet, but his attitude less friendly. He slowly left a tray of the bread on the table and caught another hand that wanted to grab it with the blunt side of fork. Naruto smiled, clearly pleased by his power of persuasion, then again held up his chubby little arms with obvious gesture that obviously meant 'Take me, damn you, you beautiful man.'

Yashamaru looked at him and then at Minato, and then again at Naruto.

'What's wrong with you, can't you take care for five minutes of your own son? I'm busy.' he said, cleaning his hands with his apron.

Minato, who was already rather unhappy for his son suddenly deciding he'd rather go to this wanna-be she-male's arms instead of staying with his father who he hadn't seen in weeks, didn't take the insult well. Unfortunately for him, the rules of passive aggression battle were harsh and clear, so he couldn't as well find flammable liquid and set the man's hair in fire- though the mental image did help.

'Oh, I'm sorry.' he said instead, giving the other man an apologetic smile. 'Guess I'm just inexperienced with kids.'

He almost added he was also inexperienced with another myriad of wifely duties that Yashamaru seemed to excel at, but since the man was still taking care of his son while he wasn't around to do anything about it (besides grow paranoia like if it were the greenest of fields), somehow he refrained from it. Naruto wilted in his arms at the obvious rejection, and since Yass didn't seem to get he really wanted him to come over, he instead turned back to look at his father and started explaining to him how he'd found a Wild Yass running around and decided to keep him since he was so good at cooking and at making warm magic glow.

Minato nodded, asked the appropriate questions in the right places and cuddled his little son while looking at the old lady over his shoulder. _Five more minutes?_

Naruto yawned, grabbed his necklace and stuck it into his mouth, continuing the unstoppable stream of words even around the hard metal. Chiyo, for being at such old age, wasn't in hurry anywhere at all. She slowly munched on the bread that was on the table and kept on observing the sight from the window. Kids, who finally managed to get ignored by everyone, snatched their own pieces from the table and swallowed it under it, quite audibly. Yashamaru once again vanished into the kitchen, not even trying to reply to Minato's remark.

The little blond was out like a light mere moments later, as usually happened whenever he had his late-night bottle, but Minato kept holding him all the same. Maybe he would have gotten tired after a while, but as used as he was as having Gaara on him every waking moment of the day, he had a lot more stamina for these functions. The old woman didn't hurry him, but once she finished the tea and bread, Minato knew he couldn't keep stalling much longer. He tucked Naruto in the bed, stroked the bright blond locks away from his eyes and pushed away the remaining toys inside the crib so they wouldn't bother him while he slept.

He was about to leave when he caught sight of the small teddy bear halfway stuck between mattress and crib. Shaking his head he fished it from the area, wondering how the hell it had gotten in it in the first place- one would think a little child would be incapable of doing these things, and yet it seemed that the poor toy always ended up wedged in odd places like this. Naruto had a good enough amount of toys, most which had been arbitrarily littered through the house, doubtlessly by the older kids. He didn't mind much- Naruto, as it turned out, was the sort who could spend hours playing with a cardboard box, while ignoring the things his father had spent actual money on.

He shook his head at the idea- figures out Kushina's spawn would be frustrating like that. And such a cute toy too, made of that soft, plushy (also hypoallergenic) material specifically designed for newborns and with such cute two-toned fur, what a total waste. And now that he thought about it, it the darker rings reminded him of…

A moment later, Minato came out from his son's room, partially closing the door behind him and hiding something in his bag.

'Okay, we are ready. Thank you for waiting, Chiyo-sama.'

'Let's go then.' said the woman, already waiting for him at the entrance, seeming to never resting at the first place. The night outside already managed to drop temperature to winter cold (which meant below zero) and started chilling out people. A few of them, who still walked around, wore now heavy brushes of material. The kage mansion, even if it looked like drowned in deep sleep, was far away from that, though. The lights, dimmed from outside, kept on being full blown inside and all members of the household – no matter if actual masters and members of family or just workers – kept on observing how the clone kept on treating the baby. Surely, it was a very good copy, but somehow it was lacking – was it the sole way of Minato responding with outbursts of emotions toward the baby from time to time or was it lack of variations of them – it wasn't anything big, but it showed. To Gaara also, as he finally managed to dispel one of the clones by unfortunately trying to get away from him and tripping him right onto the bad side of the table. The second one didn't seem to be any better and Gaara kept on fussing and indecisively trying to get the clone to act more lively. No good so far. That's why when Minato was back, everyone breathed with relief. There was no saying that the baby wouldn't see through clones finally and wouldn't get into another dangerous fit.

Minato seemed perfectly comfortable despite the chilled air, despite the fact he was only wearing a long sleeved shirt and little else over the standard top he usually walked around with. In fact, the cold temperature had seemed to do wonders for his general mood- or maybe it was just seeing Naruto and making sure with his own eyes that Yashamaru hadn't been mistreating him in his absence.

'Hello everyone.' he said lightly, letting the old lady walk ahead first, then walking to the counter to leave both his grocery bag and the woman's luggage over it. 'Did you guys miss me? I missed you all- Guess what, Chiyo-sama decided to come back to help us a bit with what we are working with, isn't that great?'

He turned, nodding at his clone, which seemed rather relieved by the fact he was finally released from its duty and immediately dispelled in a puff of smoke.

'…hello Gaara~' he cooed, looking down at the baby with friendly smile and hands on hips. 'Were you good to the ANBU?'

'Lo.' said the redhead and slowly opened and closed one of his palms. It seemed to be the sign of 'hello' and 'goodbye' altogether. He seemed to be confused a bit over that there had been two Minato's at first, but he quickly got over it, as most of his life contained same looking masked faces. However, the smell that surrounded Minato was another story. With slight frown and working nostrils, the redhead started sniffing up the path on Minato's clothes, stopping for a moment at his jaw and necklace.

'Awaa…' he muttered at that and looked up at the man. He seemed to be indecisive as of what to do about the given situation. New smells were kind of thrilling, but repetitive smell of someone else was a bit getting on him. Daichi on the other hand stilled and straightened like if he had suddenly swallowed bunch of needless.

'Hello, boy.' said Chiyo, tossing him a quite cold glance 'Nice to see you still recognize me.'

'Nice to see you decided to visit.' said the man avoiding meeting the eye of the woman. A bluff. 'The door of this house are always open for you.'

'They surely are.' said Chiyo 'They only weight tons so I can't turn the knob.'

And the kid seemed to be still more animalistic than human. From what the kid told her she expected more sane behavior.

'Aw, hello baby, did you also miss me? I missed you too~' the blond continued to coo, completely forgetting that from Gaara's perspective, he hadn't been alone at any moment. He noticed the baby kept trying to sniff him up, but since the position was prime for it and it generally calmed him down quickly, he gave him a nuzzle and a quick peck. He ignored the 'family reunion' taking place just a few feet away from him and instead walked to a chair so he could sit with Gaara in a comfortable position.

'So, what did you do today?' he asked in the usual attempt to try and coax some words out of the little redhead.

Gaara looked up at him and tried to brush his fingers against his chin – a bit forcefully, but not really in harming way. Even so, his a bit long nails felt scrapping against the skin. The question posed was repeated so many times to him already, that he actually understood what it was for and what it meant. With another sniff, trying to decipher what exactly was that thing that covered Minato, Gaara slightly opened his mouth, letting his new teeth taste the air exchange.

'Jab.'

Which meant that he probably tried to grab something and it didn't go exactly how it was supposed to go. Which explained lack of one clone previously.

'Really?' Minato asked, feigning interest while he absently brushed the phantom pain in the back of his head. 'Well, you need to learn to be a bit more gentle, not everyone here has sentient sand to protect them from hits. Remember baby, soft.'

He enforced the word with the gentlest of brushed of Gaara's head and cheek with warm hands, leaning closer to rub his forehead lightly against the mass of bright red on top.

'Remember what 'soft' is?'

Gaara's response was to rise his head up and to look into Minato's face as he kept being torn between sniffing the new smells and having to be caressed with such carefulness.

'…off.'

'Sof**t**.' The blond repeated, carefully enunciating the last t so it would stand out from the sentence and giving the baby one last pat.

'Oh, and speaking of soft-' he moved the redhead a little away, sitting himself Indian style so he could sit Gaara safely in his lap without fear the little redhead would get away. Then he asked Wren to pass him the bag of dried mint. He grabbed a handful of the dried leaves and gave the thing he was still carrying around a good scrub with it, the strong, fresh smell always being a good beginning when he wanted the baby to try to grab something.

'I got you a little something. You don't have that many things besides that rattle do you? I've been very busy lately and I think I'm just going to get busier from now on, but here Little Red, this is for you-'

The toy Gaara was presented wasn't new, but barely looked it, save from one point where the fur looked the tiniest bit coarser due some sand having stuck to the soft material it was made from, and it probably was from when he'd first moved and he'd just spent a month rummaging through boxes and throwing stuff around because just thinking about unloading everything and putting it in it's new places alternatively depressed or angered him.

'I know you are going to eat it anyway, but it's the thought that counts, right? Here you go.'

'Eeee!' announced his enthusiasm Gaara, trying to grab the thing before it was actually handled to him. The smell of mint was very strong and almost intoxicating, he could hardly stay around when the leaves let out the rich perfume. His first reaction was, of course, trying to gnaw the thing's ear off, but he stopped at it, not even properly gnawing at the thing. The fur felt different and completely new from the usual. Materials such as clear wool and cotton, not to tell about soft fur used to coat things was unusual and rare in Suna. And so was the smell that seemed to coat Minato once he appeared out of nowhere in the different side of room.

Gaara kept starring into black buttons of the toy with stare that could be meaning that he was 'deeply thinking' if it wasn't for the fact he was only toddler. After a minute of such long pensive watching of the toy, however, Gaara clamped his mouth (stopping the drooling, gods bless) and simply hugged himself to the toy, which had almost matched his size. That, even despite the fact it was all covered in mint, seemed to have calming effect on him.

'An.'

And thus, the soft fur that was shaped into two black buttons and huggable size, got christened. Minato hadn't noticed how big the teddy was (or more accurately, how big Gaara wasn't) and for a moment worried that the baby might get scared by it. Apparently the mint made it a smooth transition, though, even if he now had a toy and a miniature redhead equally covered in bits of dry leaves.

'Yes? You like it?' he gave the baby an hesitant smile, and since there was a pale brown ear kind of in the way moved a bit to inspect Gaara's expression. He had the neutral blank expression that saddened him a bit, yet was as good an indicator to the baby's generally pleasant moods as anything else. He just wished Gaara learned other facial movements that indicated anything besides fear and possessed dementia.'But not 'an'. This is 'teddy', as in 'teddy bear'. Can you say 'teddy'?'

Was he pushing Gaara too hard in learning to talk? Probably, but when looked at it realistically, they *needed* the baby to figure communication. It made a whole world of difference when it came down to catering to his needs, and that did matter, since his patience was measure on how little of it he had and general damage to furniture and/or inhabitants of the house…

'Ady.' answered Gaara and slowly took the ear that disrupted his view on Minato in his mouth, salivating it as he didn't try to munch on it. 'An.'

Daichi on the other hand didn't seem to be very interested what both Minato and Gaara did or what exactly was the object of their talk as he simply kept avoiding looking at the very disturbing persona nearby his lower hip. Chiyo on the other hand kept looking at him openly, lightly chewing something inside her mouth, more out of disturbance than actually because of having somewhere between her (lacking) teeth. After a few brief moments of sipping through the heavy atmosphere she simply turned and walked out to the other room. Daichi followed without question.

'You've changed, kid.' said Chiyo once she sat down in one of the less damaged armchairs, leaving the other to Daichi to sit in. The redhead didn't take the offer. 'You've grew older.'

The man looked around and found something interesting in the view on dull desert. The window had one of few clearance through houses to the outskirts and he was glad it did and yet… wind blew, scattering cold sands among the grounds.

'I also grew bitter.' he muttered, blinking at his own reflection in thick unpolished glass. Even there he could spot a few grey strings of hair both in his hairline and eyebrows. He lightly plucked one out, making his almost nonexistent eyebrows even thinner. 'Why did you come here? Your presence is not appreciated here.'

'Because of the mistakes you made or because of the shame you hold for them?' said the old woman and frowned as kunai thudded in front of her, damaging one of her puppets. It was leaking with oily orange poison. Lethal. 'You've really changed, kid.'

'I said you're not welcome here.' said the man, this time in slow hiss. The look he gave the woman from his slightly turned head could freeze stars. 'Why did you come here?'

'Maybe because I still love you even if you forgot the feeling for the long time now.'

A moment later a full blown fight between them could be sported, among with flying furniture and holes in the just repaired floor.

''Teddy.' the blond insisted 'Teeeh deee~'' his smile widened when he saw how Gaara was carefully sucking on the ear rather than eat it. 'I… Really, you liked it, Little Red?'

It had survived over ten seconds without Gaara trying to tear head first into the soft cotton innards, so he guessed that was a very clear indication of interest.

'…I'm glad baby-' and that was the last he was able to pay attention to Gaara because both his father and great-grandmother decided to show their maturity by turning the living room into a battlefield, so he was forced to chose between diving behind the couch for cover or have a chair smack straight into his face (he chose the former).

ANBU seemed torn between joining the quarrel to protect their master and really not wanting to have anything to do with it, so Minato took pity on them and signed to come over and leave the pair alone.

'Family matters are best solved by family itself.' he said lightly as he passed Wren the bag of groceries he'd gotten earlier. 'I brought you guys a bunch of things since I didn't know what you liked, are you up for a midnight snack?'

ANBU, though not hesitantly, had agreed to that – at least bigger part of them. People like Wren and similar to him Ants just decided to stay on the observant duty, just in case any of the royal family members would need help. To untrained eye it might have seen like both of them were in such need, but to those who had been there for longer (and all of them were, weaker chains were broken long time ago, when Gaara started just to open his eyes to the world), knew that if anything, it was experience fighting obscurity and hostility toward vigilance, nothing more, nothing less. Also, that the redhead resembled a three years old kid throwing his toys at the parent who patiently kept on trying to get close for higher and more important reasons than kids' uproar.

Gaara thought nothing of it. He was now occupied with two – instead of one – very interesting things. One was Minato, that was neverending source of anything new that could happen and the second was teeeh deee, that just for the sake of easier namecalling for now had been named ady-an. It wasn't really alive or, well, doing anything, but it was so soft and nice smelling that Gaara couldn't help but just be struck by how nice it felt against him. Lazily, sand swept away one of the flying picture frames at them and tossed it aside.

'Oh wow, sack of meat that I will eat at home, thanks!' said Vulture, as he had took out packet of dry meat outside the bag. Lark quietly had been tucking pieces of cookies under his mask by now.

'Yes, just remember not to eat it here.' Minato said, thinking that meat had made Vulture the easiest person to buy stuff for. The rest had been a bit of everything that looked more or less palateable 'I also brought a bunch of different teas, but-'

The three of them jerked when a full set of glasses exploded somewhere above their heads, showering them in shards of glass and fake porcelain, except for Gaara, who had the most convenient of sand umbrellas in existence, and Lark, who merely stopped momentarily with the consumption of cookies, before deciding to continue.

'…yeah. We'll have to wait a bit for that." Minato looked down at Gaara, who seemed to find the simple toy beyond fascinating and kept sticking tiny fingers in all sorts of different places in his anatomy and smiled. 'I think I'll be taking the chance to take a nap,' he said, leaning a bit more towards the older ANBU's side and adjusting Gaara more comfortably on his lap. 'Wake me up when they are done, please.'

ANBU nodded to that, though they hadn't been very comfortable with that. The fight itself had lasted long, though, and it's been three hours and some more when finally both of the parties calmed down, both with shouting things nobody really wanted to hear about and coaxing that didn't seem to work. Gaara for once tried to participate in it, as it was entertaining, but as both Daichi and Chiyo ignored sand attempts, he went back to admiring his teddy (as Minato had decided to get silent). Finally, Lark lightly shook Minato's shoulder.

'Hokage-sama… I think it's over.'

'Hmm?' the blond quickly moved off Vulture's shoulder, looking around and noticing that, indeed, the serenade of destruction had seemed to stop at some point of his moment of rest. He rolled his shoulders, wiped his right eye a bit and smiled down at the baby still in arms.

'Did you behave, Gaara?' another constantly repeated question.

'Awa.' Answered Gaara with his all seriousness, his eyes drifting abit astray with how he held himself.

'Is that a yes or a no?'

The redhead only looked back and then drifted away with his eyes with a wide yawn.

'Not that good, huh?'

Devil and Lark weren't behind the couch anymore and Vulture was taking the chance that the imposed weight on his shoulder had left to also exit the cramped space. Minato was only too happy to follow the example and stretch his legs, one of which had practically fallen asleep and felt like if a bee hive had decided to wake up in a bad mood inside the limb. The room was still a mess, with all ants quietly clearing up the broken debris and filling the missing sand on the walls. Apparently violence ran in this family quite easily, because the mess the old woman and her grandson had left in the room easily rivaled Gaara at his worst.

Even as he looked, the pair seemed quite busy, the short woman picking up weapons and discarded puppets in her scrolls while the Kazekage sulked in one corner of the miraculously whole table, trying to put together a vase that had accidentally been turned into a puzzle. Both were quite studiously ignoring each other.

'…well, if everyone is done bonding.' he announced loudly, making the present bodyguards cringe a little at the choice of words 'We should get back to working, right? Wren, could you please brief Chiyo-sama on what happened since Gaara started teething? Show her the seals we have been using so far- The first one we used also. I'll go prepare something for this young man to eat and I'll be right back.'

The soldiers once again cringed at the orders, but nobody really protested against it, and thus, everyone proceeded. Daichi, to announce his outrage, vanished imminently from the scene and closed himself in the office, removing himself from the path of both Minato and Chiyo and Gaara had been more than happy to accomplish eating yet another thing, among with cutlery and plates.

Minato still didn't like Gaara trying to eat the plates along with the edible substances he actually needed, but other than a… shift on the quality of the things he found when he changed his diaper, they didn't seem to affect his health in any noticeable way. He'd just have to figure a way to break him out of such habit when he actually had time to bother over such minor things. By the time he came back, the woman was already in the table with a steaming mug of date and vanilla tea and looking over the annotations Wren had left for her.

'So… what do you think?' he asked after several moments, resuming his seat in front of the woman and adjusting the baby (plus teddy) on his lap.

'I think that a lot of work had to be put into this.' said the old woman, looking through the notes. 'I see some minor mistakes, but that's not anything that could make seal work any different…'

And to tell the truth, even if it was far from doing anything good, it was finally a result of someone working with it. Once all sealers had been wiped out from Suna the matter became quite troublesome with the fact it got simply irresolvable.

'I don't really know what do you want to gain with it.'

For a moment the blond straightened and actually blushed, giving the woman a shy smile. A compliment from Chiyo-sama herself wasn't something to be taken lightly, but unfortunately, this wasn't the time to indulge in his fanboy-ism. Minato sighed and briefly moved Gaara to his side as he looked for something inside his shirt. A moment later, a small piece of square paper was extended. It looked exactly like the new, standard seals Minato had started using, with the only different this one had a few additives that were clearly written with blood.

'This is the last seal we put on Gaara before the bathroom incident.' he explained, extending it toward the woman so she could inspect it. 'I can't think of anything else that might have allowed Shukaku to make something like that in the first place, but no matter how much I look at it, I can't see anything that would be… powerful enough to let something like that happen.'

The woman took the piece of paper in her hands and looked at it quietly. It had been properly done and wasn't really lacking in anything. It should have been able to withstand quite an attack of probably one or two legendary ninjas if they'd ever get trapped by it and probably Sasori would whistle at it once it would seal his chakra strings. But then, it was a monster. Sure, it was strong and a basement to all possible powerhouses, but that was not the case. Demons, unlike ninjas, could have out of their body experiences as far as she knew… and in more than one ways. Pure chakra could do things no ninja could do, as flesh was not holding them in the place. The problem was that they couldn't do that without staying aside from the world of flesh as to move around they had to hold links to keep themselves chained between worlds to get access to both of them and to not get lost between the passages. And what was better than seals and contracts put willingly around? A droplet of blood and existence of monster wouldn't be able to perish for ages. That's why some of beings were thought of being immortal.

She thought for a moment, seeing as something was there, just within her reach of logic, but she didn't dare to touch it yet. It was too improbable and yet too possible. She didn't like how it looked like; so, she backed down to her place and instead, looked at the child, who, apart from munching on stuff, kept on hugging a plush almost it's own size.

'Gaara.' she said out loud, cutting herself from the subject of scroll for a moment. Green eyes looked at her, caught her in the sight and went back to the plush. Indeed, it was him. And the way he looked like 'Why do you have such a big teeth?'

Not that she thought that toddler could answer her, but she was sure that one of the surrounding her would be trying to explain it for him. Adults were predictable that way. To his credit Minato didn't twitch when the question came, but he did look at the woman for a moment before carefully averting his eyes.

Of course he had told the woman how stressed the creature had been while Gaara teethed due not understanding that the 'pain' its host was feeling wasn't being caused by any outside sources. He had also told her how he'd tried to reason with the creature (a sort of really superficial explanation) and just some weeks afterwards Gaara had gown this impressive denture in a span of maybe thirteen seconds. Was it his fault the monster had taken his explanation to heart?

'The teeth he was growing naturally before the one tail decided to cheat aren't pointy like the rest.' he said instead, moving to a seat next to the woman. After a quick hug, he sat the baby on the table so he was facing both of them and pulled the baby's lower lip with a great deal of exaggerated care so as not to upset the delicate skin or accidentally cut himself.

'This and this other one.' he said, showing her the only two lower teeth that looked human among a mouth that couldn't be told to outright belong to a shark simply because it lacked double or triple rows of teeth. 'I think Shukaku just decided to upgrade his general design to suit what he thinks are his new dietary needs. I'm hoping they aren't permanent.'

'They look very unstable to me.' said the woman fishing old pair of glasses and putting it on her nose. She seemed to focus on the teeth without touching any of them, which, without saying, meant that she expected of Minato holding the kid the way he did. Gaara allowed it, but indeed wanted to turn his head to the sides, which made thing a bit harder than it should've been. 'They're porous, they will either get gritted down to the right size or will fall out to give place for real set of teeth.'

Minato decided to wait a moment to see if he hadn't been hoping to hear such a thing so dearly he had started to hallucinate, then fell down on the chair with a relieved sigh, bringing the baby back to his usual spot on his lap with him.

'That's great news.' he said sincerely, looking down at the baby with a slight smile, and then reaching to stroke one smooth, hairless brow. 'I really don't know what I would have done if they had been permanent. Trying to file down his nails is difficult enough, I don't want to imagine trying it with his teeth.'

He chuckled, as if he had actually been seriously considering something crazy and suicidal like that, then turned the baby around a bit so he was staring at the older woman.

'I don't suppose you were introduced since he was born? Gaara, this is your great-grandmother Lady Chiyo, say hi to her? Nicely.'

Gaara had only looked up at the old woman and uttered something akin to 'unh' while he had his face stuffed with soft plush again. He didn't seem to be very interested in the whole situation overall so he nicely blew the old woman off. Chiyo didn't seem to be very disappointed.

'At least he is not hostile.' she added finally and looked around. The fact that Shukaku acted that way only proved that in anything, the host could be attacked. One didn't grow sharp teeth for eating meat only, but also for attacking and defending oneself.

'Sorry about that, Chiyo-sama.' the blond frowned down at the baby before giving him a light poke on his tummy. 'Sociability and manners are a work in progress as of yet. And no, he's not very hostile, unless he's angry or feels threatened. So I try to keep the same people he's already used to around, and large displays of chakra to minimal.'

Gaara looked down at the finger and let go of the plush, trying to edge away from the curious finger. He was still not used to tickles… actually, he had no prevention from tickling things. It put him at unease. Minato caught it and left it on top of the table to rearrange the baby, smiling a little.

'As for the rest… I have no idea what makes him tick. As I told you, generally he's content with being held. A lot. It's practically one of the first things he learnt to say, after my name. Or what I guess is my name- either way…' he shrugged 'I don't think he has anything personal against the ANBU stationed here right now, he generally ignores them unless they have something that interest him, and then he takes it. I'm trying to teach him to ask for things, but he has to be in the mood for it… As for Kazekage-sama, it depends. Sometime she's terrified of him. Lately things have been calmer and they kind of ignore each other, but as soon as he raises his voice Gaara gets extra clingy and has spikes of aggressively...' and then, like if nothing 'Why doesn't the sand try to kill him?'

Chiyo tossed them both a glance, a bit lost in thought so far. Minato seemed to be quite observant and no wonder, he wasn't just anyone to be mistaken with. Slowly, toothless mouth opened.

'Why, you ask…' she said, looking down at the kid. He seemed to be quite innocent and delicate, such a small premature flesh he had always been '…I wish I knew the answer myself.'

Not that she didn't. She had a few suspicions by herself, but they were old and didn't really matter. She didn't really play with them, even in long daft evenings.

'I say it's because of respect.' she uttered slowly and started rearranging bottles in her bag pack 'If it wasn't for Daichi, the monster would rot in the teapot for the rest of its earthly days… or maybe even longer. Daichi was the one who wanted it to be let out. He stood on the side of the demon.'

Of course, this was a taboo. What a kage agreed upon, everyone agreed to too, but this time it was different. Memories of bijuu roaming through the village, sewing through people with murder and horror was still too fresh; husbands and wives of buried ones were still alive, their children still didn't grow old and senile. Nobody wanted to make jinchuuriki again. And yet, Daichi was stubborn, stubborn enough to stand his ground. Stubborn enough to force his will… and to gather the respect of a demon.

'Shukaku may be primitive, but in his whole idiocy and stupidity, he knows that if he kills that stupid grandkid of mine, there would be no single soul that would want him outside the sealing pot. Shukaku might be animalistic and primal, but he lived long enough to know that there are humans who are able to put him back into the pot, no matter how many he kills and how far he roams away.'

Minato nodded at her words, but he took them as the unbelievable narrator she was. After all, disappointed granny of … 'Daichi' aka Suna's Yondaime Kazekage, he was still from another village and she was still his subject. And one could say anything and everything on regards of Suna, the people living in there and how were they treated by those in power, but he wasn't going to question their loyalty.

'I see.'

The confirmation was there all the same, the woman hadn't bothered denying it. Shukaku might we willing to slap him around and maybe break a limb or two, but as far as assassination attempts went, the man didn't have much to worry about. He decided to shift topic. It was better than swelling on how he envied that certainty, because when Gaara had tried to have a go at his neck, for sure it hadn't been with a cuddle in mind.

'As I told you before, I'm sure by now the monster found some way to mess the restraining part of the seal, because he keeps using too much chakra without it having any sort of effect on Gaara. Since the last attack on the village there haven't been any big displays of chakra or anything, and Gaara has grown a bit, but I can't tell if that's because the monster is giving him a break or just because I don't totally suck taking care of children. I thought about looking on the previous jinchuuriki to see if there is anything that could have been repeating itself, but information on Nidaime-sama is scarce.'

And by 'scarce' he meant 'censored even to its own people'

'Now, I'm not going to be foolish enough to ask a lady her age, but if you were related to him, or knew anything about him or were close or met him or even saw him and noticed anything… or, I don't know, if you heard anything about the previous jinchuurinki, it would help. I've been told it might have been a monk? Do you know anything about it? Wren's been working on the information we have, but it's all about Gaara and I'd like something more to be able to compare.'

Chiyo had only looked at him for a long pensive moment. Then, something close to spark ran through her eyes and vanished.

'The Second… he was quite a handsome man.' she said in a tone that could only say that the man was a lady killer, both in looks and behavior. 'And boy, could he give commands… sadly, things turned awry after he got in his head that there are things he could try, no matter if he really should be trying them.'

The blond gave the woman a look that would have been downright called a pout had he been only two or three years younger than he was.

'Yes, I saw the statue.' he said dryly, stopping to push the teddy slightly closer when Gaara realized it wasn't at hand's length and tried to grab onto it but proved a little too far from his short limbs, then looking back at her. 'Too pretty for this unfair world and you didn't really answer any of my questions. And they're important. I know at first he thought he had it under control, and then it wasn't like that at all. What happened? When did things go down, and why? In what's left of his diary he very poetically hints at eating human flesh almost a full year after attempting possession, yet in later entries he plainly states he started that before that. At one point he mentions a massive storm but since most pages are missing or destroyed I can't tell if he caused it or stopped it or was just describing the weather out of being too bored to do anything else. He mentions something about 'Hunter's moon' several times, but Wren tells me it's a term related with harvest.'

He reached for the carefully stacked papers and started leafing through them with no concern for the fact the way he was wrinkling the reports made the poor ANBU squirm.

'I had to practically beg your grandson for the privilege of checking on monetary records of twenty seven years ago, which is more or less when it's accepted it was announced he was the jinchuuriki. That same years there was a comparatively massive spike on incoming immigration and trade, and it stays consistently high for the following two or three years, and then it just stagnates with no explanation. Trade stops, missions stop, what happened? We tried to check death certificates to make a rough estimate about how many people died in the last year and we couldn't because there aren't. Either they were destroyed, hidden or never made at all, we had to check on ANBU records to get any sort of infomation on over two hundred people and most just make some off hand comment about ninja going MIA. Did they run away, or did he kill them? Did he kill himself, did Sandaime Kazekage kill him, who put the demon back in the teapot? And do you know anything about the jinchuurinki before him?'

'Boy, who do you take me for, some female mausoleum?' exclaimed the old woman in the highest points of abbreviation 'When first jinchuuriki roamed through the world along the side of Shodai, I wasn't nearby to admire it, I'm not that old!'

Which, of course, was a stretch because maybe if she looked hard enough in her memory she could fish out a glimpse or two, but that would be a stretch for her not so young brain now.

'I know nothing of first jinchuuriki, no more than everyone around here. He could have been truly a monk but even if, so what? Monk or not, nobody would dare to get close to such a man. Second wasn't killed, he simply couldn't contain the monster in himself any longer. He went to sleep and… never woke up again. The matter of catching Shukaku was resting upon shoulders of all available sealers at that given time.'

She had to admit it. The blond searched thoroughly and through things he really shouldn't have. It was a good side of him, a truly trustworthy skill. It was better to have him as ally than an enemy.

'I don't take care of records or anything paper-worky like that, for that you should ask people who're in charge of written stuff. Office work was never my league to begin with.' she muttered offhandedly, taking her time 'Nor did I keep my eye on him. I had marriage, I had son to raise, I had my own life to take care of. I don't even know why do you think I could help you, I never really participated in any of those affairs. Even after my son had died and I was left with no true relatives, I didn't participate in politics. What I know is that Second went mad slowly and there was no way this could e stopped, he just couldn't contain it all in his poor elegant brain. That is all.'

She tossed glance around the devastated room, like if she was afraid of something, but didn't dare to point at any danger or thing out of place.

'I never said you were, Chiyo sama, but you are the best sealer in Suna and have been for several years.' Minato said coolly. 'I've been told by my unofficial in laws that all sorts of sealing methods stem from religious practices, so if anything, just like my sensei speaks highly of you, who he has barely personally met, I'd assume your own sensei at the time might have told you something about him? If this supposed monk was indeed, the first jinchuuriki, probably all of the formulas Sunnah sealing method is based around is likely to have come directly from him.'

There was no anger in his voice, only calm certainty without any margin for doubt. The woman wasn't telling him all she knew and he was aware of it. And equally unwilling to let the matter go.

'There's also the fact that this sealing method is only taught to people related directly with kage line or elite guard, and they only get enough to be able to aid those in power, the rest are taught standard modern sealing. No, I'm sure you know, because whoever taught you must have known and warned you about it, just like my sensei and any sensei would teach a student what to expect when messing with forbidden seals.'

The woman frowned, and it was a heavy frown. Indeed, the blond was right and he caught her here – she wasn't expecting of him, so young, so inexperienced, to know so much and to grasp at so many ends. She breathed slowly, hidden behind this position, uncovered under the mask of her face.

'You're right.' she said finally 'You're right and I can't deny that you know a lot about things rarely anyone bothers with. The problem with monk, however, is that his existence is blurred and unconfirmed. Even the elders of my times rarely spoke about him, like if they were afraid of what he represented, like if they wanted to turn a blind eye on this page of our history. I surely have no idea from where he came from, his feet lead him through many way, nor I had seen him alive, because I never dared to trail such a dangerous man. In those times women knew their place, brat!' she muttered, then knowcked with her food on the floor to pinpoint her right 'I know that once he vanished, nobody dared to investigate on bijuus, jinchuurikis and all that stuff. Knowledge about sealing was passed on me, but I didn't really bother with it, it was additional. And then, Second came, the marvelous sealer, the man who could make up handwritings as he went and make them come true, almost like if he had the doors to the gods backroom opened somewhere in the lose distance. He thirsted for the big and got his hands on Shukaku. Men didn't know what they were doing at those times, brat.'

This time, no sound had added to the fact.

'I don't know how it looks in papers, but I know how it looked from the outside, and the sight was uncommon to withhold. For most of the time, the Second was harmless and loved, but at some points… at some points he wasn't. His face changed and stayed on his face, first at short, then at longer and longer periods of time. And one day, it just didn't leave. It were hard times for Sunanins.'

Minato smiled a little at what he perceived as a compliment, but n truth searching through the income was the first thing that occurred to him when the rest of the variables he could think of lead him nowhere. He'd learnt long ago that what could be censored and plainly taken out from official reports had a tendency to show somewhere in official records, weather as inconsistencies or exact information. Numbers rarely lied.

'…so he forced you to stay in the village.'

That would explain why every sort of exchange had stopped and people had started to disappear- In best case scenario, they ran away to places where their leaders hadn't descended into occasional cannibalism, and at worst… Well, Minato had no idea what exactly he was against, but for sure it was a seal. And something big enough to fuel Shukaku would definitely need more than one sacrifice.

It was sad in many ways. Most of the journals and remaining pages of them he'd read were the later ones, from the last two years. Even if seeing the impeccable calligraphy used to hold conversations that might or not have included no one but himself hadn't been disturbing enough, one of the few possessions in prime state he'd been allowed to see was a journal from before that. There were numerous entries about the man planning to use the one tail and how it would help his village. Sometimes, Minato wondered just what had the sage fought against, if only 1/9th of whatever monstrosity he had locked up could do this sort of damage.

'How many people disappeared?'

'Enough to desert streets and haunt the lively homes.' muttered Chiyo. She remembered strolling through streets that day after day became quieter and quieter, like if people left at night to who knows where, who knows how. Some probably did, but most of them probably not the way they wished to. 'It's not like people had places to go, we were at war.'

Minato looked down at the reports, not really reading them as much as looking through the numbers like if they were some sort of picture. Hopefully the kind where if you stared hard enough you got to see an image over imposing what looked like nonsense.

'Then it is likely it was used as fuel for some sort of seal, though I have no idea what it would be like. The seal we used to stop it during the storm was over a kilometer's long, but if we hadn't been using it's own power as source, it would probably have taken a whole lot more than just the seals we used-' and he didn't even want to start thinking how much flesh and blood it would have taken.

He left the papers back on the table, then pushed them into Wren's direction, far away from Gaara's grabby hands, even if they were currently full of furry plush.

'Wren's made some calculations. Based on the people who died and were attacked- in general, it'll go after anything at hand, but Wren's made a discovery that has him nominated him for the 'real men of genius' of the month award. There doesn't seem to be any preference on regards of sex, but while he does tear apart anyone it considers a threat, most of the Jounin have been literally had their blood squished from them… jounin and chuunin. The people who had their bodies mangled, but otherwise still there, they were all rookies.'

'I don't see how does it need to matter.' muttered Chiyo, moving her head a little 'Do you want to suggest that Shukaku is interested only in top tier strength and agility? That would be ridiculous, I saw more mauled kids than it was needed. Harmless.'

'I wouldn't know why.' the blond said with a shrug. 'You know as well as I do that a sacrifice is a sacrifice regardless of their physical strength or abilities, it's not like if the monster can force them to squeeze their chakra with everything else, and I don't know of any sort of seal that requires a specific level of power… Maybe blood type, but they are usually used for medicine, are they not? And everyone had different blood types. Still, it's something to consider, if nothing else for repetition…'

'It's quite interesting indeed.' muttered the old woman and slowly readjusted her bag. She was not going to dwell on something like that out loud, it was too grotesque. 'But unless you study behaviors of demons, I doubt it's much of use. More like a happy add that at least weakened might be left alone.'

'You think so…?' as horrible as it sounded, as a leader Minato knew that when it came down to it, terrified chuunin were worth a lot less than battle-hardened jounin, especially if half of them ended up like black widow, drunk, drugged or with permanent post traumatic stress.

'In the end, that's all we have so far. I'm still waiting for more data other ANBU are looking for, but I'm sure there is *something* aiding the monster. I just don't know what.' he looked down at the baby in his arms for a moment, then back at the older woman. 'Will you stay?'

The old woman had only looked around, then smiled a bit lightly.

'How could I get back after the pleasure of missing such a pair of gentlemen.' she said, cracking a bit of mirth in her voice. That finally reverted Gaara's attention from the plush, though he seemed to be more confused than cherished.

'Ady.' he said warily and moved his nostrils lightly, like if he tried to sense the danger coming. Chiyo let out a bit louder laugh. It sounded that she was at the peak of her physical abilities though.

'It's too late and too far for my old bones to walk back, even if I'm sure that old bag o'mine is already losing all the fishes to greater waters. We will live.' she said and hopped down from the chair she decided to lean upon 'I guess I will find the bed on my own as that worthless grandkid of mine once again hid who knows where… didn't expect anything else from him, really. Goodnight.'

And with that, she trotted away to more or less, only to her known direction.

Minato stayed in place for a moment, before cracking a huge smile. He tossed the baby up for a moment (apparently for no other reason than making said baby squeal and giving Wren a heart attack) before catching him and giving him a big hug.

'Did you hear that, Little Red? We are going to be working with Chiyo-sama!'

He almost wished his last talk with his sensei hadn't ended in such a horrible note because he rather wished he could send him a letter solely for the pleasure of bragging about it. Maybe if he sent one to Tsunade-hime she'd tell him… Though he wasn't so sure he wanted his sensei's bellowed knowing he was working with the old woman. Quickly shaking his head, he concentrated his attention back on the baby safely cradled in his arms.

'Gaara, I want you on your bets behavior, don't embarrass me, your hear me?'

'Mmmh.' said the toddler, once again having his face full of plush, slowly wetting it and tasting it. His attention, however, seemed to slowly divide between Minato and the toy as he looked at him with the usual adoration. 'Ear me.'

'Hm, aren't you a fast learning cookie?' he said to himself, before leaning and nuzzling his forehead against the baby's smooth brows. 'Guess we are going to have to start watching our language around you.'

That said, Gaara didn't nod to it, but only because Wren, known for his lack of tact, decided to interrupt.

'New report for you, Hokage-sama.'

And truly, he was not going to drop the title either.

'Thank you, Wren, I'll look at it now.'

When you didn't have the privilege of sleeping, life was composed of a lot of 'nows'. It certainly helped to get things done faster, but he would be lying if he were to say he didn't miss it.


	19. Chapter No 19

In the following days the pair of experts shuffled around theories and possibilities like a pair of students in the academy exchanged information about crushes and generals planed attacks.

They checked maps, irrigation fields; location of the biggest metal mines since the magnetic fields could disturb chakra depending on the force and pretty much consumed their body weight in sweets and tea. No matter how much they look there didn't seem to be any other sort of similarities or coincidences on the method or amount of people who had been killed o far. According to calendars, the dates where the monster had attacked the village or thrown those terrible storms were all around the time of full moon, but since the fact it affected jinchuurikis wasn't any sort of big news, there wasn't much to draw about from there.

Elder Chiyo on the other hand, wasn't just as helpful as everyone thought – or rather – expected her to be. Sure, she had looked through plans if she was given them, but she had mostly harrumphed them off in a shrugging manner, getting back to drinking various tastes of the same tea. She had turned the kitchen upside down, making Daichi almost sound like an eunuch whose testicles had just been removed (though she had referred to him as 'woman just about to give birth' which was just as humiliating; Daichi didn't think that making a big fuss over the fact she had mixed all sorts of herbs and the half of 'too old' away was something he could sit quiet about. Especially as she removed all brewing poisons from the fridge and didn't properly close the door either). Once she had enough of her grandson screaming at her, however, she wandered through the mansion and hid in the corners of it, gods only knowing why and doing what. Occurrence and meetings with her could appear at complete random and out of pure luck. It was visible that it was only because she seeked company they happened; otherwise, one could look for her through hours and not meet a trace of her.

Minato was rather disappointed, but since he still had Wren around, who worked hard enough to put a whole team of secretaries to shame, he couldn't really complain. Especially because her rejecting his theories, depressing as it was, did help narrow down the amount of theories running around. She also regularly sent the Kazekage into a bitchfest, which was always entertaining, and he was sure when one particularly high note had sent him in a fit of giggles he'd heard Gaara make a sound that was very much like it.

'I don't know.' he slumped on the table tiredly, Gaara playing with his teddy and some piled sand at his feet. He was out of ideas and too tired to care. 'I really don't. It's not something Gaara is doing, and since I can't think why would any of you want to have the monster playing around for free…'

And where was the raccoon, anyway? True, there hadn't been many reasons for Gaara to be upset, but this period of inactivity was putting him on edge. Gaara had looked at him up from the plush that managed to get already covered in sand in a way that said that the thing needed a good wash up… and of course, no one in the house of the Kazekage was going to waste a droplet on it. Even if whole lots of dust kept on being licked off the surface of it by Gaara's loving mouth.

'Don't know?' he asked in piping up manner. Lately, he had discovered that punctuation and tones of voice made huge difference, especially when it came to showing emotions. So, now question marks also became a conscious part of his speech, even if sometimes it was hard to decipher if he really wanted to ask anything or was just fooling the interlocutor with a play. Especially as he was fond of repeating last parts of the said words.

Without looking the blond dropped a hand under the edge of the table and stroked the baby's smooth red tresses.

'No, I don't. I have no idea.' he sighed, burying his head in his arms, but after several seconds he leaned closer to the edge to look up at the baby. He was leaning on his legs for support, but he knew perfectly well he could remain seated up on his own if he wanted to. He smiled lightly at the sight. 'I don't suppose you have any sort of suggestions?'

'Gestions?' muttered Gaara, salivating the teddy and closing his eyes in reaction for the stroke. Lately, it came to him that when he did that, Minato actually noticed that he took pleasure in it, so he associated the gesture with behavior. 'Up.'

The blond groaned.

'Now?'

'Meow?' said Gaara without hesitance. But his hands stayed stable in the air, two tiny monoliths, sure of the fate and having faith in their upcoming future. 'Up.'

Minato pouted, but it didn't have any sort of force behind.

'Yes, yes…'

Well, at least Gaara was letting him put him down at all, and he wasn't a genius of behavior but he wanted to think that the fact he did pick him back up when he was requested helped build… confidence or something like it. At least that's what he wanted to think, because Gaara having enough confidence to stay down for more than ten minutes sounded like a dream come true.

'Of course Lord and Master, sovereign cuteness supreme…' Leaning down, he picked the baby up, careful to scoop the inseparable so called 'An' along and gave both a good cuddle. Gaara immediately gave into the hug and flattened against Minato just as he usually did, refilling his closure and love batteries again. So far they were short lasting, needy and loaded longer than DOS on Windows 93.

That's how the elder finally spotted them. She could interrupt the scene earlier as she had been in place earlier, but watching her grand-grandson that was both jinchuuriki and – to her surprise – quite a humanitary baby gave her some sort of masochistic pleasure. She was old and dried up like a plum, lightening soft emotions in her surely didn't do her any good, even if they were such tiny sparks she barely noticed. Daichi would be mad if she had got attached to the household anyway.

'There you are, brats.' she said as she entered the kitchen nonchalantly, leaving a trail of dust and not minding quite a web inside her old gray hair. Gaara surely minded it, but she pretended she didn't notice that he noticed it 'I have some news for the oldest one here.'

Minato immediately straightened and smiled at the old woman, one hand going up to try and pat his messy hair into some semblance of order. It seems he was a couple weeks well behind a haircut.

'Hello, Chiyo-sama, how may I help you?' he asked pleasantly, before looking down at the baby. 'Your grandmother said 'hello', Gaara, what do you say to her?'

'Buh bye.' muttered the redhead, not really interested in doing what he should as the silver web had gained his level of interest by now. Chiyo smiled briefly, but dismissed it.

'Yeah, hello, goodbye, all the same.' she muttered 'I have news concerning what you might have been looking for… but I must warn you, you might not like it. Are you ready for it?'

'Hi, baby.' the blond muttered sleepily, stifling the last of the sentence in a yawn that he quickly covered. 'It's 'Hi'.'

He nodded, hearing what she said, but not really paying any sort of attention to it- he had no idea what the hell could she have found, but it was better than these weeks of playing detective with fragmented information. In a moment, he had Gaara at his usual spot in his arm, the other rubbing at eyes that in the past weeks had started to resemble the redhead's more and more.

'What is it?'

'You will see.' said Chiyo in a bit more than grave mood. Then, with one move of a hand, she indicated that she was not going to stay in one place and that his company was more than welcome. 'But first… what do you think of soldier pills?'

Minato looked after her, and it became obvious she was leaving he quickly followed after her

'Um… Suna's take the cake when it comes to traumatizing flavors…?' he asked awkwardly, looking behind him at Wren, who for once didn't seem to know more about what the woman could be talking about than he did. 'I've been pretty much living on the stuff for the past month.'

'Then you have to know how strong and how forceful those things can be.' muttered the woman, taking one of the ruble pieces that had been scattered around, still not cleaned by soldiers that had been slowly replacing the missing chunks. 'They can't be used in amounts that exceed hands, they can't be taken one after another in a row, they can't be bigger than the smallest nail of baby's finger. They're chakra amplifiers and they can easily destroy organic matters.'

Piece of rubble landed on the ground.

'But let's say that non-organic matters could swallow soldier's pills… what do you think would happen?'

Minato thought about it for a moment- He almost replied right away that they would have the same results, but bit back the answer before he could mess up. It was a tricky question.

'…I wouldn't know. Since they wouldn't be organic, there is no saying how their physiology would absorb the chakra, react o it or work with it at all. Even between different mammals, the reaction would be different, something completely inhuman?'

That's why you needed a veterinarian nin degree to make soldier pills for ninken and why Aburame's had their own clan make them so they wouldn't turn their chakra toxic to the bugs living off it. Hell, even Akimichis created their own version of the thing, and they were very lightly to kill anyone who didn't have their specific body type. The slightliest difference could be fatal.

'There is no saying. It might even not react to it at all.'

Chiyo smiled lightly.

'That's right.' she said as she left the rubble on the floor and went deeper into the house, until she found stairs she started ascending it seemed to lead to the less known place of the house, straight toward the vacated rooms for unused things and also, the bathroom with running water in taps. 'Since we don't know what kind of chakra is conserved in non-organic matters, we don't know how would they act. We only can assume that since they don't have muscles, there would be no reaction to forcing the chakra out of them, just as well as inducing it. Nature's chakra is very different and it's hard to disturb it. Frogs from Mount Myoboku can tell you a thing or two about it.'

Which was questionable, but since she heard that no one else but Jiraiya the Sage was the master and teacher of this blonde youngster, she was sure he had to hear about it – a thing or two. After all his summons were also known to be frogs.

'...but then, we have bijuus. Bijuus are not exactly non-organic matters, as they're solely chakra itself, but they aren't really alive thanks to that too. They're living consciousness of energy that somehow managed to evolve into being that thinks, feels and remembers. A missing link in evolution, a mystery even in the mysterious worlds of ninjas. Truly, a piece of art.'

As her son would say, it was a never-ending and ever-lasting masterpiece. Sasori was always delighted by the idea of existing forever and could listen about jinchuurkis and bijuus forever. She got quiet for a moment, wondering where the little brat could be right now, but really, there was no chance in saying. If only the Third wouldn't vanish, maybe he would be able to find a solution for this trouble, but now… Suna was dying and if Sasori was to die with it too, she'd rather keep him away, no matter where could he now be.

Because he was alive, she knew that. She had to know that.

She looked at the door in front of her. They weren't even locked. Daichi surely knew nothing of securing the water resources. The knob turned under her hand at ease, showing the terrible damages that hadn't been touched or removed by anyone so far, leaving quite an impressive piece of work Shukaku left behind.

'A bijuu.' she resumed her talk again, looking at the floor and walls. She could feel it. 'An existence without flesh, a mind without body. There's only nine of them, maybe ten, and they live in world that is impossible for us to find, impossible to reach. It isn't death but it isn't the presence and truly, who knows what it hides. Some say it hides dead souls, some say it's eternal emptiness, some say it's a progress of nature so different it could make unimaginable happen. It's unimaginable…'

She stopped and turned to Minato. She had to make sure that the kid understood what she was talking about and heard her every word.

'… and unreachable. Just as we can't reach it, thus they can't reach us. That's the law that exists, and as every law, it can be broken. That's why jinchuurikis exist. A flesh, that's all it takes. A seal, that's all it matters.'

She looked around. She was sure that for such happening the blonde described, the strongest traces had to be here. Slowly, she took out an old vial of sliver powder from her big bag. She hadn't gotten much but she didn't need any more than she had.

'So, when you give soldier's pill to the stone, there's no saying that anything will happen. But when you give chakra amplifier to bijuu? You get sandstorms that could swallow countries, depending on amounts of the blood shed.'

A plop. The bottle had been uncorked.

'It doesn't matter that Gaara is just a toddler. It barely has anything to do with him either way.' Chiyo muttered, her voice low. She looked at Gaara who looked back at her, and smiled a little at him. The kid only stared back blankly. At least this one, lethal as he could be, didn't have such stupid ideas as Second had. 'You may wonder where are chakra amplifiers and who could be that stupid to feed them to bijuu… it could take you years to find out, and the truth is, that you really don't have to search.'

And then, she simply threw a handful of the powder around the room. Dull brown walls suddenly darkened and twisted, only to get back to their previous color. The only difference now was sudden trait of writings, appearing suddenly and glinting with morbid, fresh color of blood that was just shed from the wounds.

They were everywhere.

Minato didn't say anything, just letting the woman talk and analyzing the words one by one, unhurried and calm. He could tell the conversation -interesting as it was- was leading somewhere… and even so he hesitated for over one second at the door. Ever since the incident, he'd avoided this area of the house, choosing any other bathroom instead of this one and since no one had asked, he hadn't given excuses, not that he thought he needed them. He hadn't liked the bathroom since then, and now he was too conditioned to fear it to be sure if he'd felt such dislike from the beginning or he'd just thought so now that he was behind it.

He didn't know what the woman meant to do with that weird powder. In fact, when the walls started shifted with their weight of scriptures, he initially thought he was hallucinating. The writings… They were more advanced than what he had been studying so far, mostly because he'd been focused on the seal part which was the bases of Sunnah, not the language it had been based in, but even what little he knew was enough to tell him what was written in the wall.

Amplifiers.

Brutal, raw and practically bordering on torture- He didn't know what amounted to forbidden seals in Sunnah, but if anything merited prohibition, these things crawling on the walls like maggots on carrion deserved to be thrown into the darkest pits so they would never have eyes set upon them.

The worst part was that in between the formulas and concessions there were very humane words, even if the meaning was too twisted for him to make anything out of it. Some of them were even in modern language

_Put it back _

_Put it back where it belongs _

_Behind you it's BEHIND you RIGHT NOW NOW_

_I will not eat. I will not eat. I will not eat. _

_I will not eat. I will not eat. I will not eat. _

_I will not eat. I will not eat. I will not eat. _

_You can't make me. I'm me._

_The red Moon, it's a hunter's moon, I hunt, they shine with blood_

_I shine, too_

_There is weird noise _

_Shut the fuck up _

He pulled Gaara closer, but if it was to keep him from looking at the inscriptions or just for the relief his soft, warm little weight brought him anchoring anywhere that wasn't… wherever these inscriptions had come, even himself couldn't tell.

'…The Second?'

'Possible.' said Chiyo as she looked for a second or two at writings and went out of the room, leaving a thin trail of the powder behind. It spread on the floor and crawled upon the walls, showing that not only bathroom served as art room to the tortured soul. 'I can't really say how much time the man had on his hands to do this. Whoever did this, he used buckets of blood and they were contracted with the monster. To tell the truth, we might think that Shukaku is sealed right down deep where it should be, under the skin of Gaara, but the truth is that this place is filled with him…'

She stopped and threw a bit of the powder on the stairs. Between the writings a long wide blotch of blood showed, signing that something heavy and bloody had to be dragged upon them.

' …Shukaku is right here.' she said quietly 'Two centimeters deep under our shoes, one inch behind the walls, a breath away from our skin with his dimension that can… how did you say it?'

'Make flowers bloom in veins.' said Lark quietly. Chiyo nodded.

'Make flowers bloom in veins. And he hears us.' she said and looked up. A bit of powder landed on the ceiling. How a man could draw what was drawn there in such height was unthinkable, and yet, real. 'The question is if he listens to us or not.'

Without a moment of hesitation she went into the room that had to be the room of children. A few seconds later, cacti, puppets and colorful drawings laid between wishes for death and angry songs.

'…It listens.' Minato said, rocking the baby in his arms despite the fact there was no need for him to do such a thing, quiet as the baby was. Of course it listened. It replied when he asked, it came when he requested a chat… and it understood perfectly when something useful for it was said. Just look at the shiny new teeth Gaara had gotten thanks to Minato's big mouth?

'It might be selective on what he gets, but it listens.' he licked his lips, stepping away from the blotches of visible writings while internally knowing it was a lost cause- who knew how many things he wasn't seeing just because whatever substance the powder was hadn't had a chance to show it? Writing interimposing over itself, over its own sentences and spells, growing like a parasitic plant over an old tree.

'…did you know this was here?' he asked, turning to look at the woman with an odd expression- as if the older lady had done something to hurt him. 'Did he—did the Kazekage…?'

Chiyo didn't answer right away. However her facial expression remained serious.

'I really doubt it, Daichi cannot see the end of his nose if he gets too warped up in his emotions.' She said quietly and picked up one of the puppets. It looked familiar… too familiar. 'But I can't say yes or no. I really don't know what runs in the head of the man whom I haven't seen for so long.'

Minato looked back at her, not knowing what to think. Had the man known? Could the man have known, could he have live in this place for how many years, raised two of his children he obviously cared about, slept, lived, fucked in a place where the wall pulsated with written madness?

Could anyone who wasn't out of their mind had allowed such a thing to happen?

'Lark?' he asked quietly. 'Tell him to come back here now.'

The ANBU, however unhappy he looked about it, turned on his heels and ran out of the room in short, soundless steps. It was quicker than vanishing. Lord kazekage didn't wish for sudden appearances in his room lately also. That, given he was very delicate and polite, made the leader descend from his office in which he did who knows what only ten minutes later, to drag him in his nightgown and nightly robes, right into the room where the group was waiting for them. Daichi looked at the walls and quieted down, even if he was about to let out a very undignified yawn.

A heartbeat. Maybe two.

'WHAT THE HECK DID YOU DO TO THE ROOM OF MY SON, YOU OLD WITCH?' he screeched more like a banshee than an elegant man, but it seemed that lately the atmosphere didn't suit him very well 'REMOVE THOSE ATROCIOUS WRITINGS RIGHT AWAY!'

Minato only turned Gaara away so he wasn't in direct line of either sight or screech ratio of his father and stepped in front of him, eyes practically spitting fire from the dark surrounding of his recently developed eyebags.

'Yes, of course, your majesty, why don't you give us some WATER to get it going?' he asked, in lower tones, but no less enraged than the man himself. 'Maybe some liquid soap while at it! Does this look like an elaborate prank to you?'

Did the man really, honestly thought this was just something to get a reaction out of him? He pointed at the amount of bloody writing piling on the walls, ceiling and floor.

'This might come as a surprise, but you are not the center of the world and annoying you isn't anyone's priority! I TOLD you there was something amplifying the bijuu's power- well, here it is! There you have it, you believe me now?'

Daichi looked at Minato with the rage just as big, but when he opened his mouth to say something, his ego deflated like a broken balloon.

'This… what?' he murmured, then looked at the floor I disbelief 'These are the amplifiers? You mean…'

And only now he actually bothered to read what the writings meant as the first thing he assumed were words without meanings, threw at random (it could look like that, a bit). And then, he felt his hair standing at their ends.

'What is this? Who put it here?'

Minato put the hand he wasn't using to cradle the baby to his side on his hip and gave the redhead an unimpressed look. Of course he'd know who it was, but denial was a funny thing in humans, and since he'd been on such end numerous times before, he gave the redhead a break.

'Well, I wonder, since it doesn't appear to have been you… who's lived in this house before you did?'

'Third would have never write anything like that!' said Daichi, walking now around the writings in small circles, reading them chaotically, with his horror clearly uprising 'That's unthinkable! It's been here for the whole time we lived here? When KIDS lived here? What am I supposed to do with this? I can't destroy the whole building!'

Chiyo sighed and blew off bits of air, along with her silver hairy fringe. Daichi surely was losing it like some sort of weak civilian, not a ninja.

'If you must, you will, you will also burn it to the ground. Kage mansion is not a holy artifact but a place to hide before enemy, just as every other house in here. Stop panicking.'

'But this is awful!' Daichi shouted, actually gluing to one of the walls and reading some trace of older writings with the help of his hands (at least he looked like if he needed them to read what was written there) 'Completely awful! It's Kankuro's room and he is only three, don't you get it?'

ANBUs stood quiet, conveniently. Minato was nodding to what the woman said, completely agreeing- of course it wouldn't make anyone handling city's budget – kage building indeed was just another house in the end, but it was also a symbol of city's power and kind of matter morality-wise, and so it would be a priority to rebuild it.

And that's when it downed to him that the man wasn't wailing over the budget, for once, but over the fact his little kid has been living for three years under a ceiling overwritten with crazy and forbidden seals. Not to mention the rest of them, but then…

'Wren, could you please make an average of the specific rooms where there have been the most attacks?'

The basement was by far the safest room, but after months of looking at surveillances videos he knew even if the baby stayed there for the most of the time, it didn't mean people above didn't get hurt. And now it made sense for the One-tail to be squishing humans dry of their blood.

'Lady-Chiyo… Maybe we should check other rooms for more seals. This isn't big enough to power the storms on its own.'

'Oh, if you're on on that… I bet that there isn't single room in this building that's not tainted with this. Such writings couldn't power the storm in the wildest dreams if they weren't produced massively.'

And she walked out, just as Wren nodded curtly, writing something lightly on his notepad.

'I will get Dingo…' he muttered under his nose 'He always complained that this building smells of rotten blood…'

And with that, he had also walked out. Gaara looked a bit after them, but then he got back to observing the walls. Somehow, his heart beat at least thrice as fast and his nostrils flared. Sand had only kept on rolling in usual timelength.

'Where are you going?' shouted the kage in his nightly robes 'What about this? It can't be left like that!'

'Hey.'

The redhead looked at him, for the first time looking like if he truly didn't know what to do – which was strange, given how he always had an answer to everything that happened around him, even if it reached borders of the wildest nightmares Shukaku could even produce.

'This won't go off with just scrubbing!' he told him in a voice that could indicate that he didn't see that Minato stood only a few steps away and not the other end of canyon 'This is… too deep! It's got burned into the stone, it's inside the wall!'

'At least it's just a wall.'

Minato was smiling a bit, mostly this man with his hair mussed like that and on the verge of having the perfect amalgam between a panic attack and temper tantrum had never looked more human to him.

'It's not the end of the world. Your kids are in my house and Yashamaru's checking on them, right? And if you didn't know about this or even Sandaime Kazekage , it's not like if it will affect them. Your kids are safe.'

'How do you know that?' shouted the redhead, looking at him like if he couldn't decipher what did he exactly see 'How do you know this doesn't activate on sight? How do you know it won't follow them and won't activate on the most stupid thing, like the word 'gum' or the sound of snorting? Can you guarantee that something like that hadn't seeped into their skin during their living here? This might be just a wall, but my kids sat under it, drooled on it, got wounded nearby it and went sick nearby it…' Then, lack eyes moved from Minato only to look at Gaara. They hooked on him immediately.

'This.' he muttered 'Who does he look so excited.' he murmured like if he was about to hyperventilate 'Why is he looking so, so… so HAPPY about this? What is there to be happy about? Stop that!' he practically yelled at the kid, finding easy target for channeling his emotions. He lost interest in Minato by far. Gaara had only looked at him briefly, but besides that, didn't spare him his attention.

'Because it's a smell he recognizes?' the blond theorized with a shrug, but since the sand was more active than it had been in the past several weeks, he stuck a restraining seal on his nape just to be on the safe side. 'Remember what's it made of, and we haven't really had anyone had accidents in weeks.' Old blood was still blood, and if whatever chemical the old lady had used had made it activate or whatever…

Adjusting the baby in his arms, he started walking out of the room, merely pushing the older redhead in the back to drag him away from it, because apparently, he was taking the whole things written in the wall a lot worse than he himself was, and that was saying something.

'How long did you live her before having children? It's not like affected the previous kage family, or you, or your children. This is set only to work on the One tail. And don't you have better things to do? We are going to be needing to secure some other place to stay until the building gets fixed, and I doubt you, your granny and your ANBU are going to fit in my place.'

'A secure home? I don't see a secure place anywhere anymore since the place overridden with seals have to be _burnt to cinders_.' said Daichi, very reluctantly walking out of the room as he seemed to be unable to tear his eyes away from the writings on the walls, imitating Gaara pretty much in this. 'We lived here for generations, this house remembers the days of First kazekage stomping upon the sands, it's a treasure, it's a history and now I have to… I will need to…'

The door behind them closed and for a moment the redhead looked like if he wanted to claw at them, nailing himself to the surface. Slowly, proceeding in walking, made him gaze away from the place though (which didn't happen to Gaara, but he had been merely staring, and that was all). Both of them stayed silent for a long stretching moment.

'A secure place…' muttered the man and then started giggling. Hysterical fit, however weird it was, lasted extremely short. 'I have a summer house out in the western deserts, nearby the oasis that never gets covered by sand or ventures away. It has sweet waters and we grow opuntias and pitaiyas nearby as there's source of water and the controlled area even has thermometers and irrigation sprinklers…'

He trailed off in a hesitant, dreamy tone, and then started giggling again until he suddenly burst right at the baby's face.

'How do you expect me to take this there? He will move a dune and destroy the fruits of our labors in a few minutes, because darn it, he just likes to play with sand so much!' he shouted 'There will be no stopping him if he decides to bury the tents, on the desert there's unstoppable amounts of sand to play with!'

Minato didn't know why did he find the man going into hysterics so damn entertaining, but maybe he was just a very petty person. Sure, he was making some very good points but Minato was well past the point of caring. Living with Gaara had taught him that 'tomorrow' was a very relative term that he might as well not care too much about because if he did get killed, none of this would be his problem anymore. He pulled away and leaned down, the baby propped against his shoulder as he lowered his face so the man was looking at him instead of at Gaara.

'Oh, wow, all that drinking water? That's awesome.' he said calmly, lips lifting up in a sedated smirk. 'You see, the Kazekage owes me quite a few vouchers worth quite a few showers, you think he'll let me exchange them for a bath? '

'You won't bathe in a water that is drunk by everyone!' the man said, then turned his face away, his face twisted in horror at the mere idea of something of such horrendous kind 'You don't get your showers there either! Up in the desert everyone takes sand baths and that's it! Don't pull my finger, I am not in the best of my moods!'

The blond laughed at that, a low, surprisingly light sound, especially nice because of how rare it had become for the last half year.

'See, there are worse things than demolishing a building.' he said, having known the men would react at the 'heresy' of proposing such spendful ways of treating drinkable water and purposely playing on it. Maybe a bit to ground him down, but mostly just to see him react in this funny and uncharacteristic fit of… humanity, for the lack of better word. Because seriously, sometimes he'd gotten the impression the statue of the man had a wider array from expression than the flesh version did.

'And you are thinking of this all wrong, true, you are getting rid of an important piece of history… But you really want a piece of history written like that?' he asked, making a vague gesture to the room they left behind, not that it was necessary since though the open door of the room in front of them, the small figure of the old lady sprinkling whatever she had in that little (and apparently never-ending) bottle of powder and making the deranged writings was perfectly visible.

'You are looking at this all wrong, you are not getting rid of something important to Suna, you are making a small sacrifice for your Village- Gaara is not going to stop being a jinchuuriki, that's true, but if we get rid of this, the One-tail is never going to be able to do damage when the baby sneezes wrong. Just think of all the money in damages you are going to be saving from now on.'

'The money- wha- JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?' Daichi suddenly yelled at him, making both the old woman and his ANBUs turn around in a nervous startle 'Money, money, money- is that all everyone can talk about? Where the hell is pride of memories, the joy of events nowadays? Do you think this is only a piece of furniture, a diary with black pages? I s p e n t m y l I f e h e r e and now you talk about it like if it was nothing! It's not a sacrifice, it's a memory I won't be able to pass on! You and your freaking moving tribes, you and Uzumaki! What do you know about roots, now my kids will have to build everything anew and all because of... beause of…!'

He looked at the baby who also finally looked at him with an indecisive expression, not knowing whether the outburst was forwarded at him or not and then simply threw his hands in the air.

'What a corrupted world!' he shouted, then moved inside the room, opened the window… and started throwing things outside it. ANBU looked at him in silence until he finally straightened back and looked back at them.

'Well? What are you all doing here still? If we're going to move out then someone has to be outside to secure the things that we're going to take out with ourselves!' And when a pair of ANBU vanished from his sight, he continued on the activity. Chiyo frowned at the sight.

'You-' she muttered quietly at Vulture, eyeing Lark at the same time '-and you, take him back to his room and force him to lauy down. I will take responsibility for this.'

And when both men, after a moment of hesitation, finally dragged the very uncooperative man out, she resumed the dust throwing, ignoring the fact that wind blew the cold temperature of the night inside.

'Disappointing.'

'Is it?' the blond said after a moment of watching the man go and walking into the room, Gaara back to his chest in the more relaxed manner. 'I'm not sure I'd be taking this a lot better than he is.'

Chiyo tossed him a glance, but turned her head away at her next goal.

'You'd better, I have much higher hopes for you.' she muttered 'It would be sad if you also would let my expectations down, I'm not that young anymore.'

The blond blushed and gave her a bright smile at the compliment.

'Don't flatter me too much, Chiyo-sama, my inner fanboy is already having a fit you talk to me at all.' He paused to nose at the baby's temple a little, sighing against the soft skin. It was truly good luck that Gaara had turned to be a lot more receptive towards sponge baths than actual baths he was supposed to take, because a baby that thought caking himself in sand daily was the norm was indeed a normally very dirty baby. 'But since we are talking the matter of expectations…'

Gaara rose up his head only to move it down at the feeling, enjoying mouth against his skin overall.

'Tations.' he uttered and moved a little closer, so Minato wouldn't hesitate and kiss his temple already. By now one would expect that he'd know how to do it right and at the right time.

'What, do you also hold some for me, boy?' said Chiyo, moving to the other side of the room, where there were still vaguely clean walls. At this point, the room looked like a badly overwritten place for graffiti painters who only had one color at disposal 'Don't expect me to go along the lines or anything of such kind.'

'But it'll be fun!' The blond said with a light laugh, not noticing the baby's wishes and instead nuzzling the offered crown of red tresses.

'I'm thinking- if through enough seals one can produce so much chakra the bijuu can use it to play around without it affecting Gaara, maybe through enough seals, the opposite can be done.'

'I'm sure it can.' said Chiyo, ignoring the annoyed noise Gaara made 'Unfortunately, no one really made a tutorial about such things nor is it funny and finished through the times. Play at your own risk.'

'Well, I'm getting paid for my work, I better be worth it, or your grandson might butcher me next time I say something he disagrees with…' Which seemed to be just about everything that came out of his mouth. What was the man's' problem anyway? Sure, national pride and tradition was all very nice, but they weren't exactly self-sustaining. In the grand scale of priorities in life, Such things should come much lower than survival, and like it or not, in a village dying like this, money mattered. 'But I'd rather have help from professionals.'

'Then make sure that I won't be butchered by him too and I might trail along.'

'I'll do my best.' the blond smiled, finally seeming to pick on Gaara's fussing and giving him a small kiss with a whispered 'quiet' for good measure. '…was he always so…'

He made a vague 'je ne sais quoi' gesture towards the door where the ANBU had dragged their leader. The redhead seemed to calm down at that. Chiyo glanced at the door and slowly closed her bag. It seemed that she was out of the dust so far.

'Yes, he was always a spoiled brat.' she said, filling the gap with whatever suited her 'It only showed differently. It would do him better to change his diet, he seems to be highly irritated at everything.'

The blond was all too happy to nod his agreement to such an accurate description.

'And how did he end that way?' he asked casually, seemingly busy with playing with Gaara's nonexistent eyebrows. 'You don't seem like the kind to encourage too much spoiling.'

He hadn't forgotten how the woman had claimed to have had only one child, and since Devil had told him a bit more about her grandson Sasori- and since the man obviously wasn't the Kazekage's brother- he wasn't sure what was the woman exact relation to the Kazekage's family, since it didn't seem to be too direct. Provably the sister to one of the man's grandparents? Did that mean the Kazekage was the direct descendant of Ebizo-sama?

'Truly, even if I'm a strict person, I can't control the way people want to take care of their kids. His parents tossed him out of the nest pretty early, hoping that he will get independent pretty early, but instead of growing into a lonely wolf the kid immediately stuck to his master like a bubble gum…' she paused and sighed, like if she remembered something quite unpleasant. 'I'm not sure why, maybe he was kicked out too early. I didn't even try to look at it closely, why should I had at all?...'

Muttering like that, the woman passed by Minato and went out of the room, only to enter another, obviously meant to be a room held for council meetings. In the dark of the night both table and statues looked extremely overwhelming and abandoned. She clapped her hands out of dust, making it fall on the floor. This time not a writing but a big red blotch appeared. Either Second did something out of the range here or he simply wrote so much over everything it covered the floor. She didn't have enough powder to make sure of that.

'Third Kazekage.' she said instead, stepping over the red stain. Her gaze fell on the last of three statues in the room 'Childless, as far as I know. He was a further branch inside the family, also beyond the circle of my interest. He became Daichi's father, mother and uncle, at the same time being his master and teacher. Unfortunate choice if you ask me, this man didn't have kids for a reason.'

She stepped closer, looking up high. There was still room at least for two additional statues to be added post mortem. One was for Daichi and one for another descendant. Maybe Kankuro. Maybe Gaara.

'First, he was ruthless and cruel, a perfect leader who didn't wince at the worst sight, but also at the sweetest and hottest one. No woman captivated his heart enough to let him procreate. Second… I wonder if he even saw difference between children and slaves.' A moment of musing. Old woman slowly looked back at Minato 'Which meant that he let Daichi run free and do whatever he wanted as long as he earned his appreciation. Daichi was both spoiled and disciplined at the same time, that's why he came out to be as such a brat and such a waste. I hope that answers your question, because I doubt that any other member of this family would tell you anything more.'

If there had been popcorn lying around, Minato would have probably been munching on it while listening to the story. He wasn't a specialist, so he had no real means to analyze what he was being said at a professional psychological profiler level, but he did know enough about humans to notice a few things.

He had grown up with three siblings and about half a dozen cousins, and that had made out of him a highly social person with a good general ability to withstand and tolerate with relative ease the multiple neurosis of the people surrounding him. Just like Shibi, who had grown within a large clan but with no siblings and cousins with too big an age difference had kind of made him act much older than he was and frequently put him at odds with people his age.

The Kazekage had had three kids in such quick succession his wife provably barely had time to leave a pregnancy before getting into another. And despite keeping so close tabs on his soldiers on topics like obedience and rules that it borderlined with Wren's obsessive compulsive behavior, his kids were quite the brats in the making and he obviously cared deeply for them. It didn't take a genius to figure out the man was overcompensating a bit on things.

It was an oddly… humane thing to do, which surprised Minato. He often had problems trying to pin point the man as anything else but a perpetual frown in movement. That was probably why he liked seeing him lose his cool so often.

'I guess that explains a lot… Sensei did always say there was something very wrong with people without interest in sex.' he mused out loud, personally agreeing. It was always creepy when people had too much interest on it as well, but to have none whatsoever just was higher in the level of unnatural-ity. Being devoid of a basic human instinct just screamed wrong to him. Which didn't mean his behavior was excusable. 'Guess getting him to learn how to even hold this baby might take a bit longer than expected.'

'Oh?' said Chiyo, still keeping her eye on the statues 'But he does know how to hold a baby, he even knows how to toss it up on the distance that would make any normal man get a heart attack…'

She turned around, looking at the blond, then frowned.

'…unless you mean this baby. I'm afraid that teaching him how to hold Gaara to not let him dangle upside down would be a stress you don't need to go through.'

'Well, he is going to have to learn to do it at some point or other.' the blond said calmly, almost leaning on the wall, before remembering he might as well be leaning on a detailed retailing on how to bed chakra on unnatural ways written in the blood of murdered virgins and straightening back up. "I don't know what he's been telling the council here to keep them off my back, but I don't like the idea of people thinking about kidnapping my son or murdering me because I'm from another village and they think I'll plan hostile takeover just because their jinchuuriki likes me giving him cuddles.'

Which he was betting they would all be too happy to start being paranoid about and plan just as soon as they stopped being happy because it had been months since the last time the floor decided to sprout fangs and devour the passerby's.

'This baby didn't exactly come asking to have big fat and crazy into his skull and the man acts like if he had nothing to do in the matter. He better learn to hold, kiss and at least register on Gaara's radar as something else than a menace because I have my own baby to take care of at home and I'm not going to be living here until Gaara decides he doesn't need an umbilical cord attached to me- which at this rate sounds more or less when he becomes legal in Rock country. If His sovereign majesty doesn't like it, that's too bad for him, because I'm frankly tired of basking in his radiance.'

Chiyo quietly cleared her throat at that.

'Well, kid…' she said in a tone that meant only one thing – she was not going to participate 'If you know how to do it, I'd gladly watch, but I doubt that thirty years of messed up upbringing can be tamed just like that for the sake of one jinchuuriki.'

'It's not really an option.' the blond said with a shrug. 'In the end, if his council ends up thinking Gaara might be obeying me more than him is not going to be pretty for him either. I'm just waiting until Gaara becomes a bit more social…' he gave the woman a speculative look. 'I don't suppose you'd like to give it a try? So far Thorny Devil's tried, and while he doesn't seem to like it she hasn't gotten any wounds out of it.'

'I'm sorry, brat, but I never held any of the kids of this family beyond the one moment of getting them out to this world and I don't really intend on breaking this tradition.' muttered the old woman as she started moving out of the room 'I'm not from the times where parents held kids close to chest. And as for council, if they will have an eye on you, you'd know. They can't really be discreet when they need to.'

'It's not me I'm worried about.' the blond said with all sincerity, looking around at the big blotch of oxidized red on the floor. Yashamaru better be a better nanny than he was… well…

Okay, he was a good nanny. He just hoped he'd also made for a good bodyguard. He better be, or he would eat his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti.

#+#+#+#+#+#

Arranging to move out was a relatively fast affair, since the things they actually needed for the trip were limited to supplies for the whole of them, and unlike other kids his age, Gaara's worldly possessions were limited to half-destroyed rattle #435 and Teddy-An, without counting Minato himself. Taking all things out of the building would take a little longer, but taking the baby out the house was the priority and then they could take their leisure in tearing the wretched place apart. The planning actually took more time than the carrying it out part, since Minato wanted to be absolutely sure as many precautions were taken as possible, and said precautions meant that:

a) The group of Ants would leave the city first carrying one of Minato's shurikens, and at an appropriate distance he would teleport there, since everyone agreed Gaara in the city -with few people roaming even in the dark or not- just wasn't a good idea.

b) Gaara would be wearing repressing seals until he finally got used to the idea of being outside and showed no fear or anger or any other negative emotion that might spur the sand into disaster.

c) If this test trial at one of the abandoned and sand eaten ruins Minato had passed on his way there proven successful, they would all move out to the Kazekage's summer house until either the place was rebuilt or they figured some other place in the city to remain.

Minato suggested Wren remaining at the house, since given his ability for nitpicking he was the most suited for making sure the work got done as thoroughly as humanly possible, but in reality he just wanted to give the man a few days off since he'd been working his ass off like a madman in the past week between helping Minato with the seals and orchestrating the gathering of information, and the blonde wanted him to take a few days off or risk him burning out.

The Kazekage didn't seem to care one way or another and agreed, which for some strange reason made Minato he might as well cut the man some slick and suggest him to go see his kids before leaving, especially given how concerned he had been for them and the effect their home might have had on them.

It was obvious the older man was about to say no to the suggestion, but then he'd given the blonde a speculating look –which was when Minato should have started suspecting something was amiss- and then said it was a great idea and told them to wait in the outskirts of the city until he came back.

Which was six hours later.

Normally, Minato wouldn't even have cared about it, hands full with an easily stressed baby as he was… If only for the fact that when they left it was still night and save from a light sweater he hadn't bothered with bringing anything along, leaving the rest of his luggage with the group that would follow the Kazekage. That meant that when the sun came out in all its hellish glory, Minato's +30 SPF sun blocker was with all his bags and no one wanted to go try and hurry the man up.

That meant than when the redhead finally arrived Minato's face was quite on the unhealthy spectrum of red and starting to peel at the nose, because even if they had camped out, the sand reflected the heat and the sunrays.

That was the moment when the redhead actually stopped his camel and frowned, seeing how well the face of the blonde boiled in the most peculiar way possible. He didn't know how it was possible that a Konoha-nin forgot sunscreen for their delicate skin any time they were outside, but as he learned, Minato was not very good with remembering such things like 'dos' and 'don't's. Quietly, he moved his camel nearby and put his own niqāb right on his face.

'You don't need to thank me. I was the one who was late.' he muttered and moved forward 'I'm sorry for my lateness, everyone, but there were things that couldn't avoid sparing my time – we can move forward now.'

And when the group has finally moved, Gaara had let out yet another squeal, finding new pleasure in black ends of the new veil on Minato's face.

'Oh, you are allowing me this?' the blond asked sarcastically 'How generous of you, what a kind master.'

This might seem like a very ungrateful reply for the Kazekage after having such a kind gesture towards the blonde, but it was actually directed to the baby adjusted on the blond's lap. Before the redhead came, when it became obvious Minato was well on his way to becoming thoroughly burn, the Red Ant had tried to give him a spare ANBU mask, but Gaara hadn't liked very much the idea had such an hysterical fit over it they had given up and figured a burn was a small price against the seals breaking due to Gaara's level of stress.

'Gaara.' said the kid agreeably as he pulled on the ends of it. Quickly he lost interest in it, however, as the motion of the camel and the changing view had immediately turned his attention to the side. With the way he was watching the sands one could thing he was looking at something more exciting than sand dunes, but that was exactly enough for him. Endless masses of sand that filled him with presence, comfort, security… and boy, imagine things he could do with it! Like…

He extended the hand and started dragging one of the dunes with himself. Daichi, being in front of the line, didn't notice it at first, while ANBU who did just kept being silent, completely frozen by the fear. It was better some innocent cacti than them…

Minato did notice, and like every time before (because boy, Gaara had found many ways to entertain himself while he and the ants waited for his father to return) he corrected it with a light poke to the baby's side.

'Gaara, we had an agreement, I let you cake yourself in sand and you stopped trying to modify the landscape.'

'Ify the scape?' asked Gaara as he looked up at Minato, not letting go of the dune. Thorny Devil glanced back at Minato, but Gaara didn't share the interest.

Minato pointed at the dune then shock his head, adding a 'no-no' gesture with his hand for good measure.

'You can play later when we camp out, now play with Teddy.'

'Ady.' said Gaara, losing the interest in sand in favor of the plush he pushed up to show to Minato, almost hiding behind it. It took him a long pause after that, but in the end he moved his palm in 'hello' gesture and actually tried the push the toy to do the same. When teddy didn't catch on it, he simply dropped it off. He wasn't very inclined on having invisible friends and artificial plush intelligence hidden deep in the beating plush toy. As for now, the fact that 'ady' was soft was completing his range of interests.

'Yes, teddy, hi-hi.' Minato returned the wave and ruffled the baby's hair a little. After making sure the sand dune wasn't following them anymore, he hurried his camel along a little so he would catch up with the leader of the caravan. The Kazekage's hair was a bit messed up after taking off this weird hat and veil thingy, which made him look like if he'd just woken up and rolled out of bed (which meant not too different from the previous night).

'How were your kids?' he said conversationally. He wanted to thank the man for the veil, but he had told him not to and that made him also want not to do it, purely for the sake of being antagonistic. It was complicated, especially since in replacement he was trying to be nice to the man. 'They must have been glad to see you.'

'They're used to not seeing me.' answered Daichi curtly, not even turning his head away from the sandy path in front of him. 'They slowly stop making difference between me coming and going.'

Well, not that much yet and he was still glad they actually showed positive emotions when he showed up, but then he knew it would be all the better for them to stop being so joyous over him. For the sake of their future.

'They're in good health.'

'You are their father, I don't think any kid would stop caring.' not at their age at least, maybe if they got older and the man was horrible to them… But no, other than semi-consent absentness, he didn't think the kids had a reason to dislike him. It was too bad that didn't extend to their little brother.

'Did you see Naruto?' he asked after a moment, disliking the needy, plaintive pitch of his voice but being unable to help it.

'Yes, he was also in good health.' answered Daichi, finally looking back at Minato 'It's not like anything can happen to him under the care of Yashamaru. He is trying out new food.'

For some reason the reassurance only made what little of the blonde's reddish skin visible behind the veil turn two or three shades paler and his voice drop to a completely emotionless pitch under which the panic swam.

'What sort of new food.'

'Okras, onions, lemons…' said Daichi, counting them briefly on fingers 'All stuff that isn't sweet or from dairy products, he needs to know more variety.'

Which was perfectly understandable for him, not that he cared very much.

'Isn't that dangerous?' The blond asked, back straight as a ram rock 'What if he has allergies? And why would he give him lemons, what kind of human likes lemons without alcohol involved?'

'Yashamaru is a mednin and I'm sure that he knows what is he doing.' muttered Daichi in a sigh as he closed his eyes briefly. Dullness of the desert sands could be tiring. 'I doubt he would want to hurt him, he seems to be fascinated with your kid ten times more than he was with Gaara.'

For some reason that did very little to reassure Minato. It should have made him glad that Yashamaru wasn't torturing his baby or mistreating him, or even neglecting him altogether, but it made him very nervous to think of the permanently smiling mednin attaching himself too much to his son. He'd already seen how Naruto called for the other man like if he had him wrapped around his little finger, even if the other blonde hadn't seemed to respond too well to it.

What if Naruto ended liking Yashamaru more than him? He noticed the older man drained gesture absently, and engulfed as he was in these worrying thoughts, he was only too happy to change topic. Had something gone wrong while at his house? With his kids or Yashamaru?

'…I'm sorry, are you tired?' he smiled a little apologetically. 'I just wanted to tell you I've spoken with Chiyo-sama, I was thinking… Since seals in a room can be used to power chakra, I'm pretty sure I can figure out a way to make something like that and-hm, well, neutralize it. '

'Seals in Gaara's room are channeling chakra out exactly in the meaning of neutralization.' muttered Daichi and clicked his fingers. A moment later, an ANBU nearby came by with a handbag, through which the redhead started to rummage immediately.

'Are they?' Minato had seen the writing, but they were pretty much like the original seal the redhead had been using; inefficient, w huge waste of chakra and, for some reason, they just looked unbalanced to him. 'I didn't like them.' the Konohanin said with all sincerity in the world.

'Liking has nothing to do with it.' muttered the redhead as he fished the thick black veil out of his handbag and started winding it around his head 'What's most important that they work.'

'…yes, that's exactly what I meant.' The blond chuckled, eyes crinkling lightly underneath the borrowed one he wore. 'They don't work right, ergo, I don't like them. I think they are messed up.'

'If you have better idea we can use it up in the place we're heading to, I'll gladly trade with someone else with chakra sucking.' was the answer as the man finally wore the head cap over his covered face and looked back. His eyes were hardly visible through the single layer of veil 'It's not like we will miss if we will miss the houses if he wipes them away, they're empty.'

'…that might take time.' The blond admitted begrudgingly after a few moments. He looked down to stroke Gaara's cheek, content when flake of sand fell off. As soon as the sun had come out the sand had done everything it could to stick to Gaara's skin, and given the state of his own face, he could figure why. It was awful to have this pile of clothes on this stifling heat, but if he didn't he had the feeling his skin would peel. Literally. Possibly to the bone.

'I can fix some things, but they still don't feel right. I think I just don't know enough Sunnah yet. With seals you…' he made a gesture with his hands 'The less things written you have, the better it works. It means it's refined. Less chakra, less time to work…'

'If you don't know enough then learn more, that's why you're being taught that.' muttered Daichi, looking up in the sky, but not in the direction of sun. Lightly, he steered the camel to the side 'I'm not interested how it works but if it works. Seals is not my kind of knowledge to dwell upon.'

'I'd like to think I am.' The blond replied quietly, oblivious to the miffed tone he was using 'How long did it take you to learn as much of those seals as you have? Don't compare me with Wren, he had obsessive compulsion and no ridiculously powered babies to look after.'

'Wren lives for learning information and his obsessive compulsion is a self done injury for the sake of getting this job.' muttered Daichi without much admiration 'The seals I've learned were basics and my education on them lasted until my father wanted to teach me, then I proceeded into different kind of training. You should also spend more time on getting the language closer instead of cooing to this bundle.'

'Well, 'this bundle' likes cooing.' Minato replied sassily, leaning down further and giving the baby in his lap a soft squeeze. ''This bundle' also doesn't like to compete for attention and eats my exercises if he feels they are robbing him of my attention.'

At least in this case Wren knew it to be true when he gave the excuse. He didn't think 'The possessed baby I'm taking care of tore it to shreds' would be a viable explanation in academy.

'I don't think I need to learn the language, how would that help? I only need it in writing. And you should learn them while at it, since it's what's working best.' the blond said with a shrug 'Especially because if anything happens to me, you'll be on your own.' And by 'you' he meant 'your village and you'. He tried to lean back, but there was no way to do it in a comfortable position, so he leaned forward, even if he knew his back would regret it later.

'And what is your area of expertise?' he internally added 'besides frowning', but while riling the redhead was entertaining, it was just too hot for it. 'One would think that given how you were relying on them, you'd look at them day and night.'

'I have other things to do than watching such things non stop.' uttered Daichi 'And if such needs arrives, I will learn them too, but first you have to show me what do I have to learn, not earlier.'

Gaara opened his tightly shut eyes he kept in such ways for some time in the state of deep thought he kept on being lost from time to time (and which was the closest thing he ever came to when it was to dreaming) and let out a questioning sound at the squeeze, not understanding why it came to him right now.

'And now that we'll go to the middle of nowhere, what sort of things do you have to do?' Minato asked, hands covering the baby's and stroking softly. 'You might as well take the time to teach me more about Sunnah and I'll try to explain you what I've been doing, but I'm not sure you'll find it very coherent.'

In the end, Minato mostly worked over his own feelings about what he saw. If the redhead saw nothing wrong with what he already had, Minato could do little more than tell him what he himself disliked in the arrays. Working with seals required talent, but above all, intuition.

'Only because we're going to the secluded area doesn't mean I am on vacations there.' said Daichi 'If I find time I might be doing that but don't expect me to participate with your duties all the time.'

'…yeah, sure,' Minato responded, only because he didn't care for continuing this conversation. The older man had never been particularly pleasant to engage in a chat, which explained why he tried to avoid it as often as possible. Of course the Kazekage had to have better things to do. Mountains of them, Like… pull sand out of his ass by the handfuls.

It had to come from somewhere after all.


	20. Chapter No Twenty

Minato had no idea where exactly where they were going, because it had been awhile since they had passed the ruins he'd seen on his path from Fire country to Suna. That was making him very nervous, largely due the fact that they seemed to be moving in some sort of eclectic path that steadily lead them deeper into Wind country - and that meant never-ending amounts of Sand that as far as he was concerned were utterly inhabitable.

He kept telling himself he was being paranoid and there was no way that people born and bred in this steaming piece of pulverized rock could just take the wrong turn at some important landmark, but since all the landmarks looked exactly the same (sandy dunes) and there were no clear paths to stay in (just more sandy dunes), the only reason he didn't voice his worry out loud was the very strong feeling he was going to insult everyone in the group by doing it and he just wasn't in the mood to apologize or wonder what he had said wrong. It also helped that as soon as he'd opened his mouth his lip had split and he'd been too busy sucking it in and keeping it in his mouth because Gaara immediately had startled from his quiet vigil and gave him a long, searching look that bordered a little too closely to 'uncanny creepy' territory.

And the sun just didn't go away. He'd started giving it searching looks long before the Kazekage had returned from seeing to his children, but now he gaped at it openly, half awe and half horror about the star's simple existence. It had been almost two full months since he'd been outside of the Kazekage's house, and just as long since he'd been out in the sun, since the few time he or his clone shad ran around it had been in the night. He'd forgotten how long it took for sunset in the desert. It almost seemed like it would never happen, because the longer he wondered how much longer until it set, the stiller it seemed to get.

It just… floated there, in the middle of the perfectly cloudless blue sky like a giant ball of flaming evil and burned down on him. Little by little he stopped thinking of anything specific, his whole being seeming to be reduced to offering the baby in his arms water every half hour or so and wanting, wishing, wondering when the sun would go down. No one seemed to speak a word, and if they did, Minato was too far away to listen or too lost in this unpleasant trance to register it. The camel's dull steps felt unbearably slow and the unaccustomed position made his back and rear ache in big, undefined splashes of colorful pain (red, he was willing to bet). This was so not like riding a horse. When was the last time he had ridden a horse anyway?

He just wanted to get down and ask the group why didn't they just get down these stinky beats of burden and just ran wherever they were supposed to be going (oh, God, please let them be going somewhere and not riding in big ellipse because that sandy dune over there looked so familiar) really, he was willing to runwalkcrawl wherever they were going so long as it implied moving down from this constantly swaying thing because camels weren't boats but at least the one he was riding seemed to think it had acting abilities and was trying to mimic one.

Somehow he managed to refrain from opening his mouth, and that must have pleased whatever sadistic deity reigned supreme in this never ending sea of sand (he was willing to bet it had golden eyes and a problem with alcohol) because eventually his shadow stopped being behind them and started trying to race them ahead, getting longer and less recognizable the longer time it passed.

When the Kazekage finally gave the order to stop and make camp Minato only took one moment to run the sentence through his head and decide that yes, he wasn't hallucinating before hurrying to obey, and…

And then he was on the floor, everyone seemed to be gathered around him and Gaara was wailing like a lost siren somewhere in the very near vicinity. It took him a moment to realize he didn't have the veil on his head anymore, and even if what remained of the sun hurt the sensible skin over the bridge of his nose, the marginally cooler air he was breathing felt wonderful.

'What's happened?'

'You fainted.' Red Ant informed

'…no I didn't.'

'Yes, you did.' informed him Vulture very stoically. 'Now close your eyes and don't move, were going to take care of you.'

Which basically came to transporting Minato on one of the covers and dragging him into the insides of very sandy and cracked house that seemed to be built from the sand surrounded him and whatever thing that supported it from falling apart. The camel with Gaara on its back followed, even if he moved his head in a way that indicated that he was rather nervous because of source of noise. Nobody took interest on him until Daichi had finally came in and took the bundle in his hands.

'Don't give him anything to drink until he asks for it.' he muttered 'And when he does, feed him with spoons. If he forcefully takes the water away and chugs it down, don't give him any more until the night falls.'

And like that, he went out of the damaged building. One of Ants conveniently stayed by his side while Vulture and the rest of the group quietly started remodeling the place. Soon, near Minato plastic table was put along with his unpacked luggage. Also, the walls soon lost their emptiness as all cracks had been covered with stilling seals and a quickly added place for the torch.

The only reason the blonde went more or less obediently was because he was kept busy by insisting he hadn't fainted and was perfectly fine while the group literally dragged his unsteady ass somewhere in the shade. Once down getting back seemed like too much effort, and then he had to fight off the Red Ant who either had realized she had a soft spot for him or hated his guts. It was difficult to say with Sunanin.

'I'm okay, really.'

'Your nose is peeling off.'

'I'm sure it'll get better on its own.'

'Hold till, It will get better much faster if you just let me-' the woman managed to pry her wrist from Minato's weak grasp and glared at them. At least Minato thought she was because despite the stylized ant features of her mask, he felt glared at.

'Why won't you let me heal that?' she asked. 'You look ridiculous like that.'

Minato felt himself blushing uncomfortably. The added heat made his skin hurt even more.

'I tell you, it's all right, It'll get better on its own. Isn't this thing ready? It feels ready.' He pointed at the piece of paper strapped to his arm. Just a standard mednin seal to measure fever. 'Well?'

The female stared at him in silence for a moment. Then she ripped the seal off his arm roughly, inspecting it for a moment.

'You have a fever.'

'I always have a fever.' the blond replied unimpressedly, then reached a little further for the half empty cup of tea Vulture had next to him. Without even looking, the ANBU pushed it further away from his grasp.

'Selfish bastard.'

'It's a bit high.' the Ant continued, turning he paper around to show him how the measures had climbed past green and most of the yellow to the first twinges of orange. 'You should rest.'

'I always have a fever.' Minato repeated. When the Ant just stared at him, he elaborated. 'Really. I'm not used to the heat, but I get fevers easily since I was a child. Just a sniff and I'm already bordering the 40º. Really, it's nothing.'

'It's because you eat those soldier pills like candy.' the woman said, and before he could stop her snuck a hand in his backpack and removed the small bottle of pills.

'Hey, those are mine!'

'You should have stopped taking them when this trip was announced, this affects your thermoregulation, didn't you know that?'

The blond's blank expression must have been sufficient answer, because she made the package of pills disappear beneath her cloak.

'Don't eat these anymore for at least two days and don't go out in the sun.' she got up and started to leave, but just a few steps after that she stopped and turned back to look at him. 'At least let me put some ointment on that.'

'Bring me Gaara.'

Ant conveniently didn't move.

'Devil.' Minato turned to the female. 'What did the Kazekage do with Gaara? Tell him to get him back.'

'Last time I saw them they were getting prepared to go to the nearby oasis to check if it didn't go covered with sand dune or dried up.' said the girl as she got up from her knees. She seemed to be trying to fix the plans of current place and dividing place for all people. So far two other cubes on the paper seemed to be dotted out while the one with written 'Hokage' was almost untouched. 'I will check…'

A moment later she was back with a big carpet she handed to Vulture. The man looked at it for a moment and then started laying it down on the floor. The red fur seemed to be covered with what's seemed to be both ink and acidic stains.

'They hadn't left. We're short one camel.' she announced 'Also, it seems we will be sleeping with sand monsters…'

'What?' asked Vulture. A moment later a very ugly one-eyed mastiff made completely out of sand bargained in and made a movement that indicated that he woofed soundlessly and sat down directly on the just put down red carpet. A moment later it divided into the six legged cat and smaller dog without eyes, who woofed again without sound. The cat looked at Minato and grabbed at the cover he was laying on, like if it was trying to drag it around. With no effect.

'That.' said Thorny Devil, looking at the scene quietly. 'I wouldn't do that if I were you… this is still the same sand.'

Vulture quietly hid the kunai back into the pouches.

'And Kazekage-sama?'

'Playing fetch with one of them. It doesn't seem like he has much choice, he said it quiets the kid.'

'You fail biology.' Minato informed the ugly cat, tugging at the cover back. Not that he needed any sort of additional source of warmth in what he perceived as unneeded heat, he just didn't want the new playing zoo to get it. He looked at the thing for one moment, brows furrowed. Then he shrugged.

'Bring me Gaara.' he told it, not sure if it would work or not. The animal looked at Minato, then simply, along with eyeless dog, it marched out of the covered space. A moment later shouting and a commotion outside could be heard. It didn't last long as this time a four legged lion with impressive mane but completely without head (or maybe somewhere under the mane) stepped in, dragging Daichi by the brim that seemed to have changed into the tail. The redhead looked to be pissed off and panicked at the same time while Gaara looked at it with wide eyes, a bit surprised and a bit on the verge of tears. He sniffed, once, twice and turned his head a bit higher. That was enough for him.

'Mii!' he hollered, making the animal turn into the shapeless sand again and dragging Daichi so forcefully forward that he actually tripped them both, making the man land across the blond somewhere in the position of 45 degrees and the baby crushed between them – but surprisingly safe as sand also protected him from being squashed. 'Mii!'

This time it seemed to be much more happy, even if the baby still kept on the expressionless mask.

'Hiii, little red~' the blond cooed, relieved to see that no one had gotten hurt (well, except maybe the poor missing camel) and carefully gathering Gaara in his arm. He had to move a little and put a hand on the redhead's shoulder to keep him in the same position and be able to fish Gaara out of his sand cocoon, but he managed. Even so, he was lucky to be in this propped up makeshift bed.

'Were you good to your father?' speaking of the man made him realize he was still more or less sprawled on top of him, so he looked up. Save from a slight abrasion on his cheekbone, the man didn't seem worst to wear. 'Are you all right?'

'Peachy.' muttered Daichi as the sand finally got off him and allowed him to get up. Now that he was free of the kid he could say he was honest with himself about this. 'And boy, was he good. Played with poor camel until it puked blood and only then he killed him, right, Gaara?'

Gaara looked up at Daichi but ignored him almost at the same time as he glued to Minato flatly, observing him with big green eyes. Both Vulture and Thorny Devil seemed to not hear a word of anything. Minato only looked at him with eyes that seemed no less big than Gaara's.

'Did you yell at him?' he questioned after a second or two. 'Did he want you to put him down and you didn't?'

In general, from what he'd observed from the tapes he'd used to try and analyzed Gaara's behavior, the baby didn't attack unless he felt threatened, had been attacked first or something similar. True, he tended to overreact to something as small as a dropped book or raised voice, even if it wasn't aggressive, but if this was some new development, he had to know.

'I just wanted to head out to Isis' Tear.' said the man with a huff 'And he seemed to be unhappy I'm dragging him away from your unconscious body.'

The blond stared at the redhead fixedly for several seconds.

'…and you are surprised he reacted like that?'

'Nobody said anything about surprise.' uttered Daichi through teeth 'I'm angry because it was a very good and loyal animal and that brat killed it in favor of some freaks of nature that seem to be wandering around the whole place.'

As if to nod to this statement a sandy scorpion wandered in, all covered in dots, like if it was a hybrid between a scorpion and ladybug. Daichi squashed it with one movement of his foot.

'I'm sorry for the camel, but you were dragging him in a straight line for a considerable amount of water, and you are surprised? He didn't understand what was happening, he was scared, and you know how he reacts to water.' Minato adjusted Gaara in his lap and started stroking the back of his head soothingly. 'Also, I didn't faint.'

He also didn't clarify what he did instead of fainting that involved him collapsing in a heap at the feet of his ride.

'No, you just decided to kiss the earth from joy.' said Daichi with ironic smile. 'You know, boy, when the heat is too much too take just say so, we will consider that and take care of your pretty head. We're not out here to kill you and bravery is not counted as mighty here.'

Then he patted the blond hair with almost fatherly gesture – if he had ever patted his kids like that – and went out into the heat again. He could explain to him that the kid could not know that he was dragging him toward water and that he wasn't even intending on dragging him with himself that far as he was not going alone, but there was still so much to do and arguing with stubborn half-conscious foreigner was maybe entertaining but far on the list of things that needed his urgent attention. They had all their time later for that. Minato pulled away with a gesture that seemed to fit more an offended cat than an adult and glared after the redhead.

'If I had been feeling sick I would have said so!'

What, did he think he was a complete idiot? It's just he had honestly felt well up until he got off the camel, but what the hell, with how generally sick the heat made him feel it was hard to tell when he was feeling unwell.

'…and I'll have you know- I was happy enough I might have actually kissed it.' he added primly afterwards, not caring if the man heard him or not. All he knew was that he'd been wrenched apart from the baby in a somewhat traumatic manner (for a baby, that is) and been away a whole half hour without the desert deciding to bury them alive. Gaara stuck a hand on his face, finally realizing the livid pink marking it was unnatural and Minato somehow refrained from gasping in pain.

Petting zoos, they could handle. Now, if he could just figure out how to teach Gaara to channel his unhappiness in ways that didn't end with some poor creature mangled…

#+#+#+#+#+#

When the night finally came and after the kazekage finally stopped fumbling down with everything he had to do before going to bed (as is seemed, the only house that was signed on a map was predestined for both of the leaders to sleep in, along with Gaara), Minato has got finally his rest.

For whole ten minutes. Gaara, who for most of the day just kept on staring at things or laying without much movement, like a beetle under the stone, seemed to finally wake up to life with the sun finally being gone along with the overwhelming heat. It started innocently, with him turning his head from ione side to the other and watching large cracked walls that smelled of something completely different and unknown – even for most trained ninjas. Lifeless walls were soaked with smell of previous owners – homeless who searched for home, lost in the desert who at least seeked for the shadow inside the abandoned walls and old scent of righteous owners of the place, when the place was still lively and oasis was only a few steps away, not hours. It was filled with sweat, sickness, death and new things Gaara didn't understand and couldn't grasp on. He was confused.

Lightly, he rose his head up from the soft, caring chest of Minato. He was planning on getting to the wall (somehow) to try to taste the wonderful smells in any possible ways, but then a big black butterfly suddenly flew through the lightly veiled window and started fluttering between walls aimlessly. The walls almost immediately got forgotten.

'Bzzz…'

First reaction of Gaara was to buzz at the thing like if he did with flies – it seemed to be similar, only of different kind, so he tried to imitate it to bring it closer – but as the animal didn't answer and after a few moments flew out through one of the cracks, Gaara blinked. It was such a quiet weird being. His gaze fell on the uncovered window. Stars shone through it brightly on the night sky, much more visible. Quiet murmur of ANBUs from outside flew toward him. Male voice said something, another one laughed. Something new and unknown was being baked over the fire, also another new thing for Gaara. Everything was new, everything was so much different – laying still was out of option now. Areful as he was, Gaara stayed for a few moments more silent (mostly thanks to Daichi who even in his sleep seemed to not be able to dispose of the frown; Gaara never had the occasion to see Daichi sleeping also sacrificed another minute on observing the man as he groaned uneasily and turned to the other side, showing him his back. It was an interesting thing and he wondered if to not add it to his vocabulary, but as someone outside laughed, he discarded the though), and only then finally looked up at Minato and patted his chest lightly.

'Mii.'

Minato twitched, and for a moment looked like if he would just keep sleeping. Just like that, the next moment the blue eyes opened sleepily and slowly focused on the baby sprawled on his chest.

'Hello, Little Red.' he said quietly, reaching with a hand to brush the longish bangs off the child's eyes. Apparently he wasn't the only one who needed a haircut in here. 'What is it?'

'Up.' said Gaara, not bothering to keep it at quiet levels. He looked at the window again when someone said something louder and then back at Minato. Minato lifted a hand in the usual shushing gesture and pointed towards the boy's father, who lay not too far away. Apparently the man must have been as tired as he was if he had gone to sleep so early and was still down like that.

'What, you are hungry?' he asked quietly, picking the baby up and adjusting him to his chest for a sleepy cuddle. The redhead only looked back at the window again and then at Minato. He seemed to be less and less calm with every passing second. It skyrocketed as the black butterfly once again floated inside the room.

'Ah! Da!' he squealed excitedly, pointing at the insect, and then started buzzing again, doubling the effort this time. The thing, of course, ignored him completely.

'Aren't you social at one in the morning…?' the blond mused, shaking his head lightly. The older redhead didn't seem to notice, but he decided to head out anyway. He could probably stay down and sleep some other twenty hours or so, but if he wasn't going to be allowed it, he wasn't going to ruin it for those who could. He pulled Gaara closer and quickly pulled himself up, carelessly throwing his blanket over the Kazekage's form. Sunanin must be crazy not to enjoy these all too short hours of respite when the sun wasn't trying to bake them alive, but it seemed they'd rather huddle for warmth like the crazy people they were.

Quickly fishing a longish black tunic for Gaara, he moved out of the house and to the group of ANBU talking around the fire.

The group noticed him immediately, once he stepped outside the house and thus, they also toned the volume down, both in cheer and loudness. Nothing special could be seen besides them as all weird sand beasts had either fell away or ran who knows where. Only a big sand cube in a far off distance could be seen as completely unfitting and new – and maybe even intriguing, but as it changed into triangle out of the blue, it seemed it was a thing better left alone. ANBU group did just that. Gaara widened his eyes in surprise and looked up as far as his head allowed him, observing the sky. A quick line made of falling star caught his eye so he pointed it out to Minato in awe.

'Good evening, Hokage-sama.' said Vulture as they approached the place closer 'Can't sleep in such a peaceful night?'

'Something like that, yes.' the blond said, quickly approaching the fire after acknowledging the baby's source of interest ('star') and sitting close to the fire so he could take his time fitting the warm article of clothing around the little body.

'Are you as happy to be out of that house as I am?' he asked absently. Even if the place hadn't been poisoned with all that blood and forbidden seals, just being cooped there with no possibility of escape was definitely starting to give him a case of cabin fever.

'Just enjoying the weather.' answered Thorny Devil, lightly tiptoeing around the actual answer, but Lark interrupted her with a huff, as he seemed to be eating an overfried bun.

'Maybe you're enjoying it, I am happy.' he said honestly 'You probably didn't notice it, but I am a sensory type, one of the best-'

'Yeah, yeah, I heard you serve under the kage or something like that.' added Vulture, making everyone laugh for a moment. Lark only moved his hand with a bun up and down, visibly chewing it still behind the mask.

'-and everytime I was in that house it pressed on my brain. I never knew what could that be, but now that we know and we're out, it's truthfully enjoyable.'

'I'm still enjoying the weather.' said Thorny Devil and moved one of the long sharp kunais into the fire, taking out a brownish, lightly burned piece of bread that for once didn't look like baked in Suna, along with something that looked like skinned piece of snake and carefully maneuvered it toward Minato. 'Here.'

Of course, before he could even reach for that, Gaara did it first – and wasn't able to touch it through the layer of sand that appeared between his hand and hot bun.

'Mmmh!' he said, trying to grab it differently, with the same result. He didn't know why it was like that, but he wanted this to go away.

'Gaara, manners.' the blond said, finishing the last limb through the small dark coat and buttoning it. Only once he finished he extended a hand. 'Give me that. And say thank you to Thorny Devil.'

The redhead instantly opened and closed his hand in direction of the girl in 'hello' gesture and looked back at Minato, not really minding if his clothes were opened or not.

'Thanks, Gaara, you have to say 'thanks'.' he repeated, but wasn't paying much attention, he gingerly picked the hot bread and met and blew on it to get most of the stuck sand off, before offering it back to the child.'So… can I drink something now, or am I still grounded?'

'Ankh.' muttered the redhead impatiently as he grabbed on the bread that almost vanished in his mouth. He seemed to be surprised himself it was gone so quickly from his hands, but then he started chewing and he seemed to be even more surprised about the fact that what he ate had a taste. Good taste. In the group, silence befell.

'You didn't drink anything?' said the only woman in group in the gravy tone. 'Who was supposed to give you water?'

'I don't know, I fell asleep right away, it's no big deal.' Minato said lightly. Since Gaara seemed to approve of the taste, he snatched another small piece of cooked snake from the fire and got it into a senbon so he wouldn't burn his fingers. Honestly, he was sure someone had been supposed to do it, but ANBu had been busy arranging everything and he'd decided to take a nap. 'I snatched what was left of Lark's tea before that, though.'

'That was only a spoonful on the bottom, I didn't even notice!...' said Lark, seeming to be frozen in the middle of the bite. 'Here, I have a whole bottle around…'

'But drink it slowly!' added Thorny Devil almost in motherly tone as she had even scooted closer, seeming to want to observe him closely if he didn't cheat on her 'Or you'd vomit everything…'

'Nyam.' added Gaara appropriately as he tried to get the piece of snake from Minato's hands also. New exotic tastes riled him like nothing else. Minato gave the self made snake on a stick to the little redhead, figuring the sand would keep him from accidentally piercing himself with the metal and accepted he canteen.

'People, not that I don't appreciate the concern, but when I'm dying I promise I'll let you know.' he said, scratching the bridge of his nose self-consciously… and immediately pulling away when he skin decided to remind him it had been cooked well during that day. 'I'll probably flail and make a lot of ruckus, I'm dramatic like that.'

He was about to add more, but then he drank the water, and his mouth did this weird thing… like if it had become some very, very old and dried up sponge in between moment one and two, and that sip of water made the old foam start to slowly expand… next thing he knew, Devil was wrenching the bottle from his lips so suddenly he swallowed wrong and started coughing.

'You are cruel.' he managed between two coughs. 'Evil, even'

'Of course, I'm a woman.' said Thorny Devil without an ounce of a smile and simply handed him over Gaara's feeding spoon. 'You drink using this, mister, or I will take away the water.'

'I'll wait, I'll wait.' he said, pulling back the bottle and using an empty teacup to pour a bit before offering it to the little redhead. His recent dental development meant his sippy cup had been reduced to shards so learning to drink from a cup had been the next logical step. It just took some time to break him from the habit of munching on it, which he apparently did solely for entertainment's sake.

'So… tell me, what did the Kazekage do while we waited for him?' the man had made it sound like if he'd barely said hello and goodbye to his kids before ordering Yashamaru what he had to do and leaving, but that hardly took six minutes, let alone six hours. Gaara happily took the cup in and moved it up, until almost whole water hadn't flooded his face. Then he moved it back to get away from it and looked back at the cup. The task seemed to be harder than his usual cup, but no less entertaining.

ANBU looked at each other, then at Lark. He nodded quietly, which probably meant green light for talking.

'He did everything he had been missing on since he sent the kids off to the other house.' said Vulture, the only one who hadn't been eating anything, even if the plate in front of him seemed to be glinting from fat. 'He checked kids' homework and calligraphy exercises, wrote new ones, tried out Temari's cooking, repaired another damage of Kankuro's puppets…'

'The usual.' the Lark cut him off 'Played and taught the kids, also talked with Yashamaru.'

'About what?' asked the woman, looking at Minato still. Lark shrugged.

'I don't know, he forbade me to listen to them. It also wasted some time. Then he seemed to take interest into the young one…'

'Naruto.' muttered Vulture.

'Yes.' added Lark 'I'm not sure what he wanted to do with him. But all those little things were what ate the time so much.'

'Aw, cute.' Minato pretended to fuss with helping the baby regulate the angle of the cup so he could drink, and once satisfied, gave him the rest of the snake to finish. 'And what sort of interest did he get on my Naru? Like, what he was eating, how much he weighted? Because he's a little too young to be sent to the academy if that's what he was hoping.'

Just how long had he taken to do all those things with his kids? Two three hours, if he really stretched the time? Unless he'd spent them doing some other nimiety or other, but even so, ample time to do... What exactly to his son? Because he'd doubted he'd been teaching him to eat limes, even though the redhead looked like if he consumed them daily. The ANBU looked like if they lost a track of the talk, then kind of quieted down. Finally, Lark swallowed the bite he kept on chewing upon for quite a long time.

'Just… held him and checked his, eh, height and fed him and… generally just sat with him.'

The blond blinked.

'What.'

'We don't know, we weren't allowed to listen to it.' said Vulture again with a shrug. 'Order.'

'Just visual.' added Lark.

'He was playing with my son!'

What. The hell. Was that man doing putting his grabby hands all over his poor defenseless baby without his father there to make sure he didn't harm him or break him or steal him or- What, did the man just break into strangers places and played with some stranger's kids like if he owned the place or something? Minato kept mentally berating the older man while somehow remaining completely oblivious of both irony and hypocrisy of such thoughts, especially when applied to his own person.

He had a perfectly sweet baby right here, and he would realize that if he didn't spend as much time as possible away or running from him. The man obviously was able to hold Gaara without much danger to his person, couldn't he just at least try not to mistreat him when he knew what that caused?

'Baby, you are gonna show your father good. This I solemnly swear.' he said, leaning down to pick a small piece of snake bone that got caught in between the impressive set of teeth. He remained that way, looking down at the baby with a weird expression for several moment, before leaning to push some overgrown red strands away from his eyes again. '…say, can you say 'Ttebane?'

'Bane?' answered Gaara in his usual parroting way, blinking lazily in appreciation as Minato brushed off his hair. He loved such tiny gestures. It made him want to do… something. He didn't know what or how to react to it so he just straightened a bit more toward the hand. 'Bane.'

''Tte-bane'.' Minato said, smiling a little and leaning to nuzzle his forehead against the baby's forehead. 'It's great for motivation.'

'Mii!' That was surely motivating enough for Gaara to recognize him.

The rest of the night was spent nearby the fireplace, where the rest of the food was ate and most of ANBU just came and went patrolling the place. As it seemed, it was such a hidden (or maybe forgotten) piece of the desert that the only thing that showed up and wasn't made of sand was one spider who seemed to be more lost there than be part of the habitat. ANBU let him lose but Gaara squished it accidentally by wanting to drag him to his own face.

When the morning came, half of the group decided to lay back in their houses, while Vulture, who seemed to not show any kind of tire went out to hunt meat for breakfast. Only when the sun was above the ground in its whole circular shape the face of Kazekage had finally emerged from the house and it wasn't even the man who was ready to greet anyone. It took him another hour to take a proper skin scrubbing, wearing clothes and doing who knows what else in such faraway place where nobody could hide from eyes anyway. It was nearing eleven in the noon when he finally came by.

'Good morning.' he muttered and sat down nearby the burnt out fireplace.

'Morning.' Minato answered without looking up from the things he was writing at the sand. He was using the sanbon to draw some symbols that didn't seem to agree with, considering the way he was frowning at them. Gaara was sitting on his own just a half a meter away and seemed fully absorbed by playing with crinkly wrapper of the bun Lark had been eating several hours ago.

Minato finally looked up - first at Gaara, to make sure his father's presence didn't personally offend him, and then made a vague gesture towards a curious copper pot with a long spout sitting close to the embers.

'Devil left your coffee by the fire.' he said absently, looking back down at what he was writing on the floor. 'She also wanted to wait for you, but since serving coffee isn't that complicated I told her I'd do it.'

Not that he'd had any real intention to do it, but what the hell, he wasn't going to let the poor girl remain some extra two or three hours awake for no reason when the man could perfectly well get it done himself. And if he got bitchy, well… serving liquid from a pot to a coffee cup wasn't going to kill Minato.

'Fine, pour me a cup.' muttered Daichi reaching out his hand for the supposed cup. For the woman to leave man unserved was pretty rude, but he could careless – he had stressful day and bad night, so a cup of coffee could save the day for him. No matter who served it. Gaara from the distance ceased the play with the incredible shiny and loud 'appe' and looked right at the pair. It seemed that the man somehow caught his attention with the fact he came closer. Daichi didn't share the look, he just glanced down at earth and lines he couldn't really comprehend. 'What is this?'

'You know you can pour it yourself, since you are closer and all.' the blond told him without much emotion on his voice. Jabbing the senbon in the middle of what he'd been drawing, he leaned closer on both hand and made something between a push up and a cat stretch. The obscene way his back cracked might have traumatized lesser men, but the blonde just smiled with obvious pleasure and easily got up to go reach the cup. It also was next to the redhead, but what the hell. Thorny Devil had been up all night and he didn't doubt if he complained the older man would just go and drag her or one of the ants to do it in his place.

'I'm trying to correct some of the things I didn't like about the seals you have been using in Gaara's room, but I have to be missing something.' he said as he carefully poured the dark beverage in one of the handle-less cups. "Like this, I'd just make the one tail be unable to focus on a target, but that's not good enough. Too much collateral damage, if I could just figure a better connectant to deny the whole thing…'

He reached up with his hand absent-mindedly and tried to scratch his cheek, only to pull away with a hiss.

'You just told me you will serve me it, what the hell…' muttered Daichi with slight annoyance in his voice as he got up to serve it to himself. It not that he minded, he wasn't really used to being pampered by everyone and this wasn't a service that was demanded by anyone from him, but it seemed that his ANBU got lost in their duties and didn't know how to validate his position here. And the man just said he will do it only to negate it in a moment. He listened quietly to the talk, ignoring it for the most of the time; he didn't understand what was wrong with the seals and he couldn't help him even if he wanted, so Minato was left alone with that on his own. He could only appreciate that he wanted to do it at all. At the hiss, however, he rose his eyes at the man, squinting his eyes at what he saw.

'You have freckles.' he muttered as he sat down 'Pretty.'

'I did serve it to you, what do I do with this now? I don't drinks muddy sludge-' at the man's next words, however, he practically slapped a hand across his face.

'Oh, no.' he stressed, edging away as If the man squinting at him had been a clear and alarming sign he meant to pounce. 'That's not right. That can't be.'

Not so soon, at least, he was counting on remaining lobster-red for some good two or three days and only then worry for one of the most embarrassing quirks about his body. He couldn't be getting freckles already.

'Wet a tissue in it and put it on your face, burns should come off quicker.' muttered Daichi, also seeming to not notice the panicked movement of the blonde. 'Food on the desert has more than one use, don't you know it… what are you doing?'

It seemed that only now the man had finally decided to get a hold on the strange bahvior and frowned over it.

'Don't hold sandied hands close to your face, you can irritate it.' he said and with one strong movement simply tore Minato's hand from his nose 'What's wrong with you, it's only freckles.'

'Only freckles!' the blond countered loudly 'They are only some freckles now, but give it a day or two, and they'll be everywhere and I'll turn into a clone of my sister when she was twelve.'

'Freckles don't do any harm, get a hold on yourself!' said the man with sudden anger in his voice as he intentionally threw him down to make him sit. Only then he had only crouched down and started drinking his tea in silence. Only after the second sip he looked back at the blond. 'You have a sister?'

'Yeah, well, you are not the one with the cutesy features of a little girl,' the blonde complained, gingerly reaching up to feel the tender skin again.

At the question he shrugged a little and picked back up the senbon, starting to tap the weapon against the sole of his sandal.

'…I had an older sister, but she died when I was little.'

'I'm not, but I wouldn't make such a problem out of it even if I was.' muttered Daichi quietly. 'Unless you're searching for a wife? If that's how it is, you should expose your face even more, it's different feature from usual brown skin, it's attractive.'

He didn't comment on the other news. Death was an everyday bread for shinobi, there was no use in dwelling on that.

'I suppose Naruto could use a mother figure…' Minato muttered, but he sort of couldn't shake the feeling that finding someone to replace Kushina as a mother would be even worse than trying to find someone that could replace her as his partner.

'Then again, I guess he has Yashamaru for that.' he added in a grumble. His jealousy at the idea was almost as obvious as the promise of freckles softly blooming on his skin.

'Yashamaru would never be his father, he is only his caretaker for the time being.' muttered Daichi sipping at his tea 'He may become someone whom Naruto recognizes, but he will be coming and going, and you will stay. Unless you get killed, of course.'

'Oh, wow you are really good at this.' the blond says, but the older man's comment makes him smile all the same. 'Let me guess, you take rounds on the hospital to cheer the patients on death beds to keep on living.'

'Maybe not death beds, but beds indeed.' answers Daichi lightly, taking yet another sip of his tea. 'Have you ever tried searching for compassion there?'

'I'd have to be near beds for that.' the blond chuckles again, the subtle proposition seeming to go straight past his head and well beyond. 'Last night was the first time I slept in forever, and Lord and Master junior over there decided to wake me up in the middle of it because he decided I didn't know enough of desert moths. But you are going to let me go take a nap in a few hours, aren't you, Gaara?'

The redhead turned around, his face stuffed with half of torn wrapper.

'Awa?' he mutters through it, blinking, and then continues to chew on the thing, softly, like if he was afraid he could damage it while he was doing exactly that.

'I wouldn't count on that much.' Daichi adds calmly 'But you can always try.'

And yet another brushed off shot at the sexualized side of the blonde. It seemed like if the man simply has got none or like if it was too hidden for him to get to it. The only thing that was left for him was a heavy ammo. He could as well try it now…

'You know…' he murmured as he got up and bended down a bit toward the blonde for the good measurement '…maybe you should relax and play loose with someone from time to time, it really helps with stiffened muscles.'

And with that, the redhead touched lightly the brim of already formed freckles on the left cheek of Minato.

'Think of yourself for once.'

'Ow.' the blond complained, closing one eye and wincing a little, but not really pulling away. He wasn't really surprise the man has finally stopped just looking and actually openly made a proposition, at least to him, since he still didn't seem to realize all the times the man had invaded his personal space had been with sexual intent. He was used to be usually judged by looks alone, and his looks

Even so, the man's words still make him smile, but instead of answering he just turns his attention on the pint sized redhead.

'Oh, Gaara…' sighing exasperatedly, he pulled away from the redhead to lean on his side and drag the baby by the back of his shirt until he was close enough to pick, after which he started pulling strips of cellophane from his teeth. 'That's not edible baby…'

Daichi blinked, surprised at the open ignorance after such a crude and perverted outcome. He didn't really expect that – if anything, he could've expected being even laughed at, but not such an open escape. Quietly, he straightened out and resumed drinking his tea. There was no use for him staying over now.

'I'm going back to bed.' he muttered around the cup 'Take care of your nose, sun is beginning to get into high states.'

'Hm? I already put sunblock, thank you.' he says as he fishes a noodle-thin piece of plastic from between Gaara's teeth.

He was about to ask if the man was feeling all right, what with him going back to bed when he usually slept around four or five hours the nights he let himself sleep. Then, he figured that if he were in the redhead's place, he'd do exactly the same- take the chance to sleep off everything he hadn't been able to sleep in the year.

Which brought him to bigger issues. Picking a long red tress, he tugged on it a little.

'Gaara, my friend… I think it's high time for you and I to get a haircut.'

#+#+#+#+#+#

As it came, it wasn't a relatively easy task to do, even if it obviously could get harder. Gaara found an interest in the new shiny object (scissors) and after inspecting it thoroughly he decided that he definitely wants to chow down on something so long and thin, and he didn't stop his demands until accidentally the sun hadn't blinked in Minato's headband. Only then he left scissors alone and found utmost joy in dangling the material of headband around his hands (without chewing down on it… yet). Cutting went in quiet atmosphere until at some point a four-legged chicken hadn't came in and noticed the blade nearby Gaara's skin. A moment later the place was filled with the many almost-animals watching, hissing and growling at Minato at any point he decided to snip the red hair, but none of them did anything. Only when it came to the side where scissors were getting nearby eyes the last one and definitely not an incomplete being showed up, using quite a grand dune to morph a head of Shukaku, along with eyes inside it's nostrils. Demon didn't say a thing, only watched what's happened in grim atmosphere and didn't answer any posed questions and commands.

That of course, attracted ANBUs nearby who kept guarding Minato from every side, and when the haircut was done, they went away without a word of acknowledgement. Bits of hair that fell away on sand grew roots and stood out proudly in it like the reddest and softest desert grass available.

Minato mostly ignored the nightmare parade of zoofolk indignantly clucking around. The truth was that he had expected the sand to forcefully remove him, maybe mistakenly figuring cutting Gaara's hair would equal hurting him or something like that, so no one was more surprised than him when nothing tried to nip, snip or literally ask less questions and take more fingers.

Of course he was careful, he actually held the longish strands of red between his fingers to ensure there was sufficient space between the baby's skin and the sharp (in the place the teeth hadn't dented it) blade of the scissors, but sicne this was still a part of HGaara who was attached to his body…

Then again, he doubted Gaara even noticed beyond the fact he kept playing with his hair, since it wasn't a painful process and there was no way for him to actually see it besides the pieces falling down.

'There you go.' the blond cooed once finished, picking the baby up and holding him up high. Minato was nowhere near a hair stylist (Kushina had in fact told him numerous times that if anyone figured out how he cut his own hair to keep the same style they'd die of a fright), but he personally thought that the messy spikes sticking out of Gaara's head made him look adorable. It kind of looked like Kankuro after his sister had gotten him into a headlock, only the brunet's hair was usually a bit longer than this.

'All short and sorta tidy, don't you feel so much better, baby? No more hair in your eyes.'

Gently prying the headband from Gaara's hands, he held it up so the child could catch his own reflection on it.

'Better baby.' said Gaara in answer, but he stilled once he caught a clear glimps of himself in the reflection, obviously startled. Then he blinked and looked at Minato only to look back at the headband again. He tried to reach out to it, but then he got started even more when his own hand covered his own face in reflection and his eyes widened even more. Quietly, he shied away from it, hiding his face in Minato's vest.

'Aw, what is it?' Minato put a comforting hand on Gaara's back and stroked '…you've never seen your reflection?'

Come to think about it, the only mirrors he'd seen in the house were the ones in the bathroom (and when he went with Gaara there Gaara was too nervous by the proximity of the faucet to pay attention) and the small, decorative ones in the walls (which Gaara was never the right height in to gaze at, not that there had been many left after he started teething and the walls shook them off like fleas). That was sad. Naruto could be entertained with a mirror for hours as soon as he learned to sit up on his own. It was also a great way for Gaara to find something more interesting than figuring a way to literally be joined at the hip with him.

'Hey, Lark? Think there'll be stuff leftover in the ruins? Like mirrors?'

'Very possible, Hokage-sama.' said the man as he polished his kunais slowly 'This place is like a deserted dump for old memories, if you dig a bit in the sands you can find any sort of things around, from bones of the owners to the newspapers-'

He stopped, looking suddenly at the west, making Thorny Devil look there too. Then they both went back to their previous activities like if nothing's happened.

'-they've read when they were alive. Maybe you can find a mirror if you look around-'

Once again he looked at the same direction, making Thorny Devil repeat it with one second lateness.

'It's bleeding.' said Vulture, like if he had muffler on his mouth. After two seconds they all went back to previous positions.

'-so you can try searching for it.'

After that, both Lark and Thorny Devil vanished like if they weren't there at all.

'You like your meat raw or burnt?' muttered Vulture as he got up.

'If it's bleeding, it better be well cooked before you bring it to camp, so you might want to eat over there,' Minato quickly picked himself up, pocketing the headband and taking Gaara in arms.

'We are gonna go scavenge hunting a few houses down until you get back, you should be able to reach me in the communicator when you guys make it back.'

Vulture didn't say anything, just sat down on the sand again.

'We will definitely call you over.' he said and smile could be heard in his voice. He didn't move from the spot when the blonde stepped away.

With one last call for the ANBU to enjoy his meal, the blonde quickly ran down a few houses until he found the tallest remaining building (a two store house) and climbed up, facing the small amount of half demolished buildings. It showed they were much older than most of the houses built in the Village, who not only had had to be reconstructed often in the past year, but also had changed designs for rounder ones so it would be harder from the sand to get stuck in corners and piles in the occasion of the sandstorms often plaguing the village. These were the usual squares and rectangles, the ones that's still conserved all their walls.

Even so, they were desert building, which meant that no matter how destroyed they looked, the chances of most, if not all having cellars where to hide if storms got especially bad were very high.

'All right Little Red, Your choice. Where do you want to start exploring?'

He held Gaara around so he'd be facing what was left of the settlement.

'Point out and we started there.'

'There.' said Gaara looking curious about what he saw. A pebble fell off one of the walls, rolling on the sand with quiet 'thud'. It caught his attention, so he turned toward it, sniffing the air.

Minato followed the line of sight and pointed.

'That way?'

It was one of the closest houses in line, and there were only two walls remaining, it was as good a place to start as any other.

'Good choice, let's see what we can find.'

At the beginning Minato went slowly, mostly looking around. He wasn't used to the area and as such he was having trouble seeing anything of interest. There were random bits of wood from leftover furniture, which he carefully collected in a spare scroll for camp fire (since there wasn't a particular excess of wood in the desert it explained how the ANBU team had been feeding it for days without much of an issue) and bits and pieces of glass that creaked under his boots (and that the sand sucked in at random, only to nosily crunch on it moments later). He found several pieces of paper from torn up books and half buried tomes with almost completely faded out words (which he also picked up for burning later) torn up pieces of fabric (which he left since they would serve no particular purpose),

'Mii.'

'Yes, Little Red?'

Gaara was pointing at something over his shoulder, and when he turned around, the redhead kept showing the curled little finger in the same direction.

'There.'

From where he was Minato didn't see anything in particular in that corner of the room, but since Gaara seemed to have fund something that interested him, Minato walked closer. As they did, Gaara's little hand slowly moved downwards, clearly indicating something in the floor, but even thought the ex Hokage kept looking attentively, nothing seemed to happen.

Until he stepped on it. There was a dry, wooden crack, a shrill shriek from Gaara, and then Minato jumped backwards. A moment later around two meters wide worth of sand slowly started dropping down with a silky hiss.

'Well done, Gaara, you found the basement!' Minato gave the baby a quick kiss and set him on the floor, creating a makeshift torch out of the dried rags and some of the wood. He took a moment to leave a mark he could use in case anything happened and he needed to get out of there fast, then picked up Gaara and after throwing a pebble into the dusty below to summarize that yes, it wasn't that far down, jumped to the passage with the baby in arms.

#+#+#+#+#+#

By the moment they were back, the new fire had been burning from quite some time and by the smell that could be felt in large distances thanks to the light wind that seemed to just play with wavering heat, the meat was smokey and already burning to crisps. Thorny Devil slowly moved the piece of leg to the side where anything red could be spotted over the larger fire while men slowly chewed what was on their plates.

'Ah, you're back finally.' muttered the Kazekage, looking like if he was trying to eat piece of a tire. 'I thought that you've got lost in the sands.'

'I actually kind of was.' the blond said, throwing to the Orange Ant the scroll storing both paper and wood he'd been able to find.

'Most of the blocks are all connected underground, how the hell do you manage to build things on sand without it collapsing on itself?' he asked as he sat down between Thorny Devil and Lark. Since Vulture was the only one who wasn't playing with anything edible, he supposed he'd already eaten at some point during the couple hours they had been away.

'We build upon the foundations of old buildings.' muttered Daichi and frowned. 'It's dangerous to walk around the forgotten passages, they can actually fall down, even if old buildings are more stable than new ones.'

Thorny Devil gave the man piece of meat that looked like quite a meaty thigh.

'Yes, that also happened.' the blond thanked the female, then rolled his eyes when the piece of meat was taken from his hands by Gaara, who unsurprisingly seemed to relish in his newfound carnivorous nature.

'Sure, know yourself out, Little Red. Do we have any pita bread left?' he asked as he looked around on the bag in his side, producing a very dirty bottle with something inside. It seemed to be miraculously undamaged, even if the sand had rubbed off whatever sort of label it might have had.

Thorny Devil quietly produced a packet of pita bread out of the thin air. Lately she had been a very quiet help who seemed to have anything anyone asked of her, but who didn't really participate the circle of talk.

'What is this?' asked Lark, noticing the dirty bottle 'Is it from ruins?'

'I was going to ask you.' he gave the dark brown bottle to the older man and accepted the package with a small smile 'One of the bigger houses had a room in it that looked a bit like Yashamaru's work room , but the things didn't really look medical. Just in case it's designed to melt my lungs at the first whiff, I decided not to open it without asking,'

With a shrug, he got two much smaller bottles from a pocket in his vest and passed them to Devil, who was directly to the other side.

'The small ones look like perfume bottles, but the sand didn't try to eat these, so I don't think they have anything like that inside. Other than that just wood, paper, some books and more random stuff.'

Daichi took it from his hands without a word and brushed the surface lightly. It looked familiar, even if he was sure that there was no way he'd meet something like that in nowadays world. Slowly, he uncorked the bottle, but he put it back in almost immediately. The smell was too strong and it came with quite a strong feeling of nausea.

'It smells natural.' he muttered, handing it back to Minato 'Looks like herbal mixture added for skin healing, but the herbs used in it are things that one doesn't use today… since they're too strong. It's an archaic relict.'

'So, do I sell it or do I throw it out?' he had only brought them because since Gaara accidentally hurting himself with glass wasn't an issue, he figured he could play with the big one and he actually planned to keep the smaller ones for no other reason than the fact they were pretty and he liked to occasionally keep such things around. He distractedly reached to brush Gaara's' hair from his eyes and instead found the short, soft spikes of hair that now adorned the fair head. Gaara looked up at him, hands and mouth sticky from what little grease the meat had on it and about half of the quarter thoroughly chewed.

'Were you hungry Gaara?' he asked gently, stroking the baby's brow. 'One-tail paid visit today when I tried to cut Gaara's hair.' he informed the Kazekage. Even though the creature seemed to have developed an interest in exercising creative monstrosities that moved around camp at random, they hardly had seen anything that signaled immediate presence of raccoon since before leaving the house. 'Not in a very talkative mood, either, I think it's miffed.'

'You keep it and search for someone crazy who is willing to pay for such thing, even if it stopped working thirty years ago.' muttered Daichi, not even looking at the pair. 'And why the hell did you give this thing a haircut. His hair don't grow.'

Not that he cared much. He seemed to be mostly annoyed at the fact that Minato involved himself into such activities. Gaara slowly licked bone out of meat and then bit through it like if it was made of waffles. Minato, as if this were a perfectly common occurrence (which as far as this particular baby was concerned, it was), asked him if he didn't want to stop for some water.

'His hair was so long it covered his eyes when I forgot to tie it back with one your daughter's scrunchies.' he told him calmly. Guess this answered his question about how much attention this man paid his son vs. when had been the last time he even looked at him. True, Gaara's hair had remained rather unchanging for a while, since no one had tried to cut it since it was born, but since he had started binging on milk and cereals and started gaining weight, the baby had grown a bit.

'Either way, it's short again now, so it's not like if it's going to be important for awhile.' he pointed to somewhere several feet to their several feet to their right. 'Unless you want to grow red sand grass.'

The other man slowly rose his eyes at the blond and at the red strands standing out of the ground and stilled like that. ANBU around him occupied themselves with eating through the burnt meat, drinking small rates of water and feeding the fire with available wood. Then, as if something had flicked off in Daichi's barin, he scrunched his face in bitter disbelief.

'What the hell is this?' he asked no one in particular, looking at red strands growing out of sand 'What kind of mockery is this?'

'The Bijuu trying its paws at horticulture?' Minato shrugged while helping Gaara tilt the teacup so he could take his usual small, calmed sips while the small hands held what remained of the leg and bone. 'I don't think the whole 'green thumb' thing is working for it.'

Daichi's gaze was back on Minato in milliseconds. The rejecting expression crushed and fell apart only to show growing anger.

'What green thumb?' he hissed, making ANBU stop their eating and looking up alarmed at their leader 'Is this a joke? Are you trying to set me up?'

Minato stopped fussing over Gaara and his own meal and turned to look at the older man as if a 6th thumb had suddenly made its way out of his left nostril.

'…set you up for what?'

'Don't play with me!' the man shouted suddenly, throwing his plate into the sand 'Do you think that I don't see how you laugh at me? Do you think I'm not aware of that- what are you all looking at?' he yelled at his ANBU and when none of them had said anything, he simply turned around and walked away toward the red strands. A moment later red hair were only hair and nothing else, laying sprawled on the sands.

'There would be no freaking modifications on my desert when I'm alive!...' he muttered to himself as he passed the group and went back to the place where his belongings laid. Once he closed the theoretical curtain red strands moved and once again stood up on the sand, like if nothing has happened. The group stared in silence, no one really moving or doing anything, eyes set on the now empty door of the room. It wasn't until one of the logs in the fire snapped loudly under the heat that Minato shrugged and Gaara resumed his sucking the marrow out of the bone in his hands.

'… Lord and Master gets weirder and weirder the more time I spend next to him.' Minato said offhandedly, snatching a bit of loose skin from Gaara's hand and chewing on it. 'Devil, you are a smart woman, please remind me in the future I really don't want to talk to him until he talks to me first.'

Thorny Devil only looked at him, then nodded while eating small pieces of meat from her plate.

'It's better to stay away from when he gets angry.' she said quietly 'He gets dangerous for people around him then.'

Which wasn't anything new, precisely. Most of stronger ninjas did.

'Yeah, I think I might stay here for tonight.' the blond agreed, not really concerned about his physical well being as much as really not being in the mood to deal with the oldest redhead reenacting the stereotype of angry woman in her period.

'Day' turned out to be 'days', since in the end Minato preferred the company of the ANBU over those of their master and since Gaara only ever let him take short naps before requesting his attention, it was just easier to relax when he knew the guards in duty where looking that the baby didn't try anything mind-scarring. Apparently red-hairs growing in the desert (well, not really growing so much as standing there and never letting the shifting sands cover them) had really offended the man's delicate sensibilities, because it seemed he only came out to give orders, eat, and then retired back to the living space he'd chosen for himself on his own, since Minato only ever came into the place if he needed something from his luggage.

In the meantime Gaara learned how to voice difference between 'meet' (meat) and 'ita' (Pita) and confused everyone around when he started asking around for 'ink', since no one would figure what particular interest the child might have on making some to write. As it turned out, he'd finally figured a good word to separate solids from liquids and the request was actually his way of phrasing 'drink', a word that was constantly repeated over the campfire.

In the following days Minato started drawing less in the sand or in paper, only occasionally making some annotations on a small notepad not unlike Wren did with his endless supply of notebooks. When concerned ANBU asked on the matter he just said he'd had an idea but he needed to think it over for awhile.

Instead he busied himself with exploring everything that could be looked at in what remained of the houses, finally finding the mirror he had been looking for (he found three, actually, but one was cracked and the other had what he swore was a humidity stain, only he wasn't sure mirrors got humidity stains or that humidity existed in the desert).

Gaara found a huge liking in the foundings; it wasn't immediate – at first he shied away from the mirror every time it was shown in his face and tried to push it away when Minato didn't want to hide it away. The breaking point came with old make up case that contained old, but still useable set of make up for civilian girls. Unable to connect the fact that the mirror only reflected whatever Gaara did to himself, the redhead managed somehow to change his whole face into colorful oily canvas which he hid behind dark powder. It entertained him for a few hours for a few days, until he finally caught on the trick and lost interest in the mirror itself. Instead, he started making small copies of it by sand, meaning that he started putting flat pieces of rocks around the places that could start making shapes mimicking whatever came by. It almost scared to death the lark-masked jonin when suddenly rock copied his movement. Gaara found it interesting enough to push even further with newly discovered jutsu and soon everyone were followed by mirror-like shadows and at the end of very nasty, hot day, he actually made a full three-dimensional copy of himself that made exactly what he did, mastering shadow cloning at the ripe age of almost a year. ANBU looked at it in fright and tried to avoid new experiments at any costs, while the kazekage mostly ignored whatever happened around him, either sleeping inside the buildings or riding away on the camel to the nearest oasis – even if they had enough of water. Nobody stopped him either – thick-threaded skin had suddenly thinned lately and the redhead became more and more bothered by reality even at the point of it becoming creepy; especially as one day he acted like if he were about to cry over the fact that he wasn't able to eat whole dinner and praying to his half-emptied and half-filled plate almost until first stars showed up.

Minato seemed to be too busy with whatever he was doing walking in and out of ruins on says to no end to pay much attention to the ANBU's concern. Since the technique required concentration, that helped keep Gaara busy for longer spans of time and gave the blonde more time to dedicate to this new secret idea he had been working in. In the end, didn't children try to imitate everything they saw around? Gaara was just being lazy and doing it with sand instead of himself, so long as he didn't try to harm or damage anyone, he didn't feel it was something that he needed to discourage.

He also didn't have time to bother himself wondering what weird bug had bitten the Kazekage, since he barely saw him he couldn't know he was acting out of ordinary, and the one time he did notice (when he stayed staring for absurdly long spans of time at his food) the moment he opened his mouth to ask if everything was all right, Devil gave him a quick jab to the side that quickly shit him up.

He had bigger fish to fry, in the most metaphorical of senses. It took him another four days to get said fish ready for skinning, but he did it get it done. At around four in the morning of an unusually cloudy morning-to-be, Minato came back for the ruins to where other group was, went straight for Vulture's backpack and retrieved what looked like a large blade until he snapped it open in the traditional shape of a Füma Shurinken. One hand full of bladed windmill and the other of baby, he went back to the fire and gave the remaining soldiers a grin.

'Hello friendly individuals of the sand, I bring forth great news that would be awesome if they weren't so incredibly frustrating, wanna come take a look?'

All trio that had been left near the fire looked up at him in silence. They didn't know what to think of it, so they conveniently stayed silent, waiting for further explanations. Minato looked at them all with friendly expression.

'Come, you know? As in 'Move towards area of testing I have prepared for show show and tell.''

'With pleasure.' piped up Lark, huddling more into the cover he was covered with 'But we're on duty and can't leave this place without a good reason.'

'Reason!' said Gaara and once again tried to reach out for the big shuriken in Minato's hand. It seemed to be oddly entertaining, especially with how it glinted in the light of the fireplace 'Mii!'

Minato, who seemed to have been created solely with the interest of indulging him, obediently opened the shuriken into two segments and gave it for the child to inspect – see, the good thing about automatic sand defense, is that worries about toddler ingesting poisons or losing limbs in the usual accidents of usual ninja life were nonexistent.

'How about the fact I figured something that might be able to keep sand from harming you?' he looked down at the hand and made a small face 'If my wrist doesn't give out first but- Yes, that. Good reason enough?'

Vulture smirked under his mask, and even if it was soundless, it could be somehow noticed in the way his shoulders moved.

'It's hard to believe but if you're right, I'm buying it.'

'Don't get too exited yet,' the blonde said with an odd, small smile. He looked for pleased with himself and affronted at the same time 'It's still a work in progress, but if I'm the right track we might just be able to, at worst case scenario, figure out a way to make bunches of safe spots from which where to make long range attacks. I'm really hoping for something bigger, though.'

He adjusted Gaara on his side, closed the shuriken back with a metallic snap and grinned at the other pair.

'Well, you coming or not?'


	21. No 21

Minato had apparently chosen another half-destroyed building to make work - one of the few who didn't seem to have any sort of cellar on it, and it seemed to be the furthest one from camp he'd managed to find with only the remaining piece of two walls to work with. He'd spent who knows how many hours painstakingly cleaning the sand away until he found the hard packed floor and then, he'd spent who knows how much longer drawing on it with white paint.

It glowed eerily in the moonlight, a perfect circle of something less than two meters with at least three other visible circles accompanying its circumference. They were littered with tiny markings and both symbols and words dusting it. It looked like the work of an autistic person with much too free time or a very conscious effort to win a contest for pain sticking detail.

'You might want to stay over there.' he told the ANBU who had followed him to the site as he pointed one of the nearby building. 'I need sensorial feedback on how the chakra works inside the negative circle.'

Just eight feet away, there was a considerable smaller circle, simple as it could be, and it was there that Minato walked to, dropping the shuriken next to the larger one. Once in there, he gave the baby in his arms one last cuddle before plopping him down on the circle. Then he gave a sign.

'Okay Gaara, you want one more treat?' the blond asked while a large toad somehow materialized from the shadows it had been hiding and carefully took place inside the circle. 'First things first though, you remember? How old is Gaara?'

Rising a single finger was an easy enough sign to teach a child, especially one like Gaara, who could always be trusted to figure out the mechanics if the reward was good enough. That's why Minato produced a package of extra spicy Lamb Pastırma. He still lacked the basic mechanics to make the sign easily, so a lot of the little redhead's attention was diverted to suing one hand to lower all fingers from the other until a single one reminded, which so far had worked perfectly well with Minato's previous two test trials on the matters. One had been done the previous night, and the other earlier in that night so the sand had time to work off the aggression – or more like drink it away. In his searches through the place Minato had found a distillery with most of the raw contents still resting in great metal contraptions, and since the monster had somehow seemed to miss them, it was a matter of going back there and poking a hole in one of the distillers for it to instantly forget upstairs something had ticket it off, especially when it wasn't repeated circumstances.

The toad – a large creature that would have probably been around chest-height with the smallest of the Ants- carefully arranged itself in place, twisting this way and around to find a way to keep all its limbs within the small area. Toad's bodies tended to be wider than taller and such the place remained a bit crammed , but after folding it's legs into what looked like a very uncomfortable position, it looked down to the shuriken and gave Minato a thumbs up.

'Come on, baby, how old are you?' Minato nodded, all his attention in the baby - and figuring how to keep the baby's on his by squeezing the package to make the smell and the paper as attention grabbing as possible 'Show me and you get another one.'

It was hard to get the right momentum, but fortunately enough the green frog had the biceps of a butcher and the distance between both circles wasn't that great to begin with. With a small jump and a 180ª spin Gamahiro sent the shuriken flying straight for the little redhead on the floor.

The weapon stopped a few millimeters before Gaara's head, almost touching it, but not really. The redhead, who had been gazing hungrily at Minato's hands turned his attention away from them finally and looked at the thing stuck in the sand. Slowly, he reached out for it and took it within his mouth. It didn't taste just like the faint smell in the air, but it satisfied his need to chew on something. Quietly, he rolled down on his belly and started chewing on the metal, making loud, damaging sounds, while sand kept protecting the corners of his mouth from the sharp edge.

'Another one.' he repeated loudly, not minding the group of ANBU around him and rolled on his back, staring at Minato. 'I-ita.'

'Sit up, Gaara.' Minato said as if this were the most normal thing in the world, turning the baby back around and giving him a strip of the cured meat as reward. Prying the shuriken from the sand wasn't very easy and he was pretty sure sharpening it again was going to take some time, but he threw it again to his familiar and went back to previous position. 'Once again, baby.'

Gaara immediately started eating the piece of meat, his eyes widening at the taste and his red hair standing out at its end more and more with every bite. At the last chomp the attitude of eating toddler resembled much more of a wild animal than hungry human baby. At the same time, a large paw behind Gaara rose and caught another shuriken thrown by a frog, this time shooting it back with twice as strong force, sending a few of sand balls on its own. The ones that hit the surface, torn the holes size of an adult's fist in it.

'Nyam!' said Gaara almost shouting and looked up at Minato with excited eyes. 'More, this, this!'

The toad dodged by flattening itself on the floor, and the shuriken flew past where it had been and embedded itself onto the at least to two third of the length of the blade. The sandballs tore a good sized chunk of what was left of the ball, but the single one that actually made it into the circle the toad was standing off seemed to lose all sort of momentum and sprayed harmlessly once it went through. Gamahiro quickly went back up and started brushing the sand off himself like if it were dirty.

'This wasn't in my contract!' the toad cried, shaking a fist in its ninja's direction.

'Yes it was.' the blond replied calmly as he ruffled Gaara's hair and gave him another strip of meat. 'You like it spicy, Little Red?' he cooed, before turning to the toad. 'Try fire now.'

The redhead grabbed at the meat with much more aggressively, but once he put it in his mouth, sand immediately started stuffing itself inside too, so very soon the redhead was munching on something that could be only called a 'sand-meat salad'. His eyes glinted weirdly at one point and his cheeks went from pale to puffing red, but he didn't seem to notice the spice otherwise.

'Oh, no baby, don't eat sand! You know I don't like that.' while Minato fussed, the familiar just stared at him, but since Minato seemed done looking at his way, and thus, completely immune to all and every glare he sent its way, it just adjusted itself inside the circle again. After a moment of looking down at the baby and make sure Minato was ready to dodge if needed, it threw a long, thin stream of fire towards the child.

It was blocked by the sand all at once by the headless lion that seemed to sprout out of nowhere suddenly just to block the path of fire. While it melted, two blackened orbs opened above it and frowned in the manner that showed that indeed, the demon wasn't happy. A moment later, the sand started rolling around from all the holes it could find and started filling the place only to lunge at the frog with full force of spikes it generated. Gaara looked at that with indifference, still chewing on the sand without a single thought of stopping.

The spikes, which could probably have gone straight through the wall without a problem (as the ones that indeed went past so clearly illustrated), but the ones that made it into the circle didn't just break off like the sand covering Gaara did when the little redhead was covered in restriction seals.

Inside the circle the sand lost any sort of adhesion it might have, and only was left with the momentum of the throw, which mean that the frog was now getting something like shovelfuls of sand thrown on it. It seemed that the moment the sand entered the circle it the chakra both holding it together and powering it disappeared completely. When the attack finally ceased, there was a great pile of sand where the frog has been before just minutes ago. It reappeared from within the fallen grains a moment later, frantically wiping at its mouth.

'Oh, my gods, itgotintomymouth!' Gamaihro flailed spastically for a moment, webbed hands gingerly touching it's large mouth. 'This doesn't taste like sand, what's on it?'

'Oh, you don't wanna know… Trust me on that. ' Minato said, picking the baby back up and giving him the last piece of meat from the package. The answer made the summon stop dead on its track and give the Konohanin a horrified look. A moment later it had literally puked its guts out and was furiously trying to wipe the grains off the organs.

'Gross!' the summon was immediately dispelled before it decided to do something even more revolting, and after looking at the barely active sand left in the floor, Minato threw a flaks with raw alcohol at it to keep it entertained while he joined the ANBU on the roof.

'What do you think?'

'Pretty awesome.' said Lark, being probably the only one being able to say anything as other ANBUs just stood there without movement, slightly agape. Gaara quietly ravished the given piece in peace 'But how the heck did you do that?'

'Lady Chiyo gave me the idea- the house, too. Obviously if we can amplify bijuu's powers while writing enough in the walls, the opposite should be possible as well, right? ' Minato shrugged, all the while trying to wipe the sand from Gaara's face now that it seemed to have stopped trying to get into his mouth along with the piece of meat.

'I chose a pentacle since they are usually the best sort of protective circles-' he gestured towards the large circle 'But that alone isn't strong enough, I wanted to create a forbidden space, but that doesn't really work, since to be able to forbid One-tail of anything I'd have to hold higher authority over it, and since we don't have the chakra to call onto that authority- not unless you want to run through the Ants's chakra like rechargeable batteries- what I did is pour chakra on the borders themselves. I used the other sigils and seals on the sides to strand the chakra there- so rather than waste chakra inside the whole circle, I just concentrated it around it, less space and stronger where it's applied, I guess it would be just a matter of recharging it? There are problems with it, of course…'

He trailed off, frowning at the circle on the floor lightly while he finally seemed to give up and adjusted Gaara on his usual spot on his hip. The redhead piped up, more in reaction than actual emotional answer, while sand rustled restlessly around the floor. It was obvious that not only humans listened to this conversation closely. Thorny Devil lightly cleared her throat.

'So, you mean that you're going to put that inside the new kage mansion?'

'That's neat.' agreed Vulture, his shoulders finally relaxing 'Less stress, more effectiveness.'

'I'm not sure.' the blond said, frowning down at the sand and giving it an absent kick. 'There are lots of flaws on the design yet. I know for sure it could be better, I just don't know the right words for it yet…'

Regardless of the fact he didn't want the monster to hear what he was talking about, he also didn't really want to speak a lot about what he was doing

Actually, there were more problems than that. As it was, he couldn't make the circle any bigger since it was carefully calibrated to be able to protect that specific enclosure (he also wouldn't have been able to make it smaller, not that he could think of any reason why he'd want pin-sized protection circles anywhere). He also couldn't have it placed in any place of the house that wasn't on solid ground, so all floors but the base one were automatically ruled out, and while the basement could be made with several protection spots, the rooms directly above it would be useless.

Ideally what he had hoped for was to create a circle where they could put Gaara and make sure no offensive would be able to come out from, only he had no idea how to accomplish that. Maybe after he majored in Sunnah and figured out all the good ideas he could filter out of the journals of the Second…

'…I guess I'll just send this to Chiyo-sama and see if she can think of anything better since I'd need to know the right words for it…'

'This would take at least above twenty hours of journey back and forth… and this is not counting whether she'd agree or not.' muttered Lark, losing his good mood like a deflated balloon.

'Wouldn't it be better to ask Kazekage-sama?' muttered the only woman in group, looking at the floor at the close, tracing one of the lines with fingers. Maybe she could try to imitate it with chakra lines… but she highly doubted she could take it to such level of details 'I mean, it's not his special ability, seals, but…'

'…but he is Kazekage-sama.' said Vulture as he slowly walked around the circle, leaving thin footmarks on the sand. 'He might at least know whom to ask to waste less time.'

'What? No, that's a terrible idea.' Minato hugged Gaara closer, as if he wanted to put him as a shield before him. 'I don't think any of you have talked to him in days, and personally, I think it was smart of you. Have you seen the mood he's in?'

Gaara let out a squeak, mistaking the protectiveness with affection and flattened against Minato with all his admiration and love. Lark sighed at that, then put his arms behind his head, obviously reignited at this point.

'Had he truly ever been in good mood last few months?...' he let out between whistling, like if he didn't really want his words to be hearable. Thorny Devil looked at him, but he was already stargazing through one of the broken windows. With a slight, good-natured shake of her head she moved her emotionless mask toward Minato.

'The point is that lately he has been in other mood than bitter anger and that's just as good situation as any other.' she added 'You can as well try now before it changes into something worse.'

'He has been eating healthily in hiding I'm sure.' added Vulture, slowly closing the circle of his walk 'So his mood has to be better. We cannot leave his side, but if you are desperate, you can take one camel and try to go back on your own…'

'What, so he send you to kill me for stealing precious weapon of mass destruction, or so he can rub in my face I'm not doing my work well enough or that he's wasting his money on it or- or…'

Only the Kazekage had never actually accused him of being slow, or not putting enough effort on what he was doing or anything like that, had he…? Actually (and unlike some other people who had commissioned him for seals in the past) he had never hurried him or accused him of wasting time or hinted someone else would be able to do better in his place. Sure, the man had screamed to high heavens when he'd told him his fee for the work, but at no point did he so much as hint that he thought he was being overcharged- only viciously grounded that he didn't have that kind of money at his disposal. And he was still paying him exactly what he had asked for regardless of it.

He never stopped to tell him he slept too much (which would be impossible to do, given the circumstances, but he knew people who *would* have complained of it regardless -*cough*DANZO*cough* - ) and the only times he insisted he stay awake was on periods of great stress, like when Gaara had started teething… and even then the man had stayed along them every time things got rough.

And he'd even said he was learning well.

Damn it. The man didn't even let him hate him in peace. As detestable as he was as a human being, it was kind of hard to fault him as an employer, and wasn't that, in the end, the only thing he should care about?

'…fine.' he finally said, giving the baby a hug while he was at it. 'Fine, I'll go talk to him. If nothing else, I'll need his permission to get Wren here to help me with all of this, right?' he stared in the camps direction, as if he could see the building the man was occupying past the ruins of the abandoned town and sighed. 'If I'm not back in ten minutes, get me a rescue party.'

'You can count on us, really.' muttered Lark and sat down on one of the higher plains of the sand. The others only nodded at his set off and came back to what they were doing previously – walking and staring at the grand circle on the ground. Gaara tossed them a glance, but he mostly just stuck to Minato, enjoying another set of caresses he had obtained through the unspoken surprising events. But as it came, the redheaded ruler of Suna couldn't be spotted in his usual hiding place which was one of their houses he used for sleeping, neither he could be seen around the fireplace. By the fact that one of the camels was missing the only unavoidable resolution was that he once again left to the nearby oasis to refill their half-empty gourds with water.

'And now he's too good to share a leftover city with us?' Minato muttered to himself silently as he emptied one of the smallest backpacks he'd been able to find. 'Guess there's just not enough air in the whole wide desert for the whole of us, huh?'

Once sure it was the right height, he put Gaara inside the bag and tightened it just below his armpits so his arms were free. If the sand disapproved of the circumstances, Minato just ignored it and put the backpack on, leaning forwards slightly.

'Comfortable, baby?'

'Eee!' squealed the baby, throwing his hands in the air approvingly. New position and new thing he could get to know with was so far, quite exciting experience. He looked around wildly and then reached out for Minato. The blond smiled and reached behind to take the small arms and place them on his shoulder.

'We are going down for a run, baby.' he said, giving the small hand s light squeeze. The weight seemed to be about right, and as long as he kept the angle he didn't think he'd have to worry about either him falling or his head bouncing too hard. 'We'll start slow and start going faster, so just tell me when you want me to go slow, right?'

'Aight.'

'Brave baby.' with one last look to make sure he had both the compass and map orange-or-brown Ant had given him, he was off at a light trot to test Gaara's reaction to sudden new speed.

The redhead took the varying speed first with astonishment, then with squeals that could only mean that he was happy and finally, with something that could indicate nervousness (which meant that Minato had to finally balance his speed). After gaining the steady pace, the child had quieted down and only looked to the sides, observing how dunes passed them in silence only desert knew.

It wasn't long before they reached the oasis; it wasn't anything a normal outside could expect – it was deep, filled with water that looked mostly brown from sand that enclosed around it and obviously visited often as many traces of animals could be found nearby the shores – both mammals as insects and any beings from between the food chain too. One of the missing camels had been laying nearby, munching at hard leaves of unknown bush that seemed to sprout around the places in a few various locations, along with very high cacti and grasses of unknown origins. The only object that could seem like the human in disguise sat nearby the shore, hunched over in position resembling very much pair of elders from the hermited cave. The sand around him and in few various spots seemed to have sparkling, yellowish tint.

Minato stopped as soon as the thing was visible, dropping back to the light trot. It would serve to wind him down from the run, and hopefully to avoid any traps set. Not that he could see any, and unless the redhead had put that hole crawling with baby scorpions as a security measure – doubtful as he was, he wasn't going to fully discard it just yet– he reached the sparse vegetation surrounding the oasis without much problems. The fact the man didn't so much as turn in his direction ticked him off, though.

'…um… hey.' the blond called, carefully threading his way around what few stiff leaves of camel grass jutted from the sand 'So… are you going to stay here much longer? Because your ANBU and I-'

He was abruptly stopped from advancing with a sharp tug from the object on his back. Craning his neck around he found Gaara had caught in his hand one of the leaves from the three palms growing there, and didn't seem very inclined to releasing his prize just yet.

'…Gaara, you mind?'

A moment later the palm (short of a mouthful of leave) gently sprang back to place, and Minato turned to look back at the man. Who still hadn't moved.

'…Kazekage-sama?'

The redhead slowly moved his head to the side, barely uncovering the side of face that seemed to be a bit too wet for the shining sun he was exposed to and blinked hazily, his eyes barely focused.

'Why'd you come here for…' he muttered, almost biting the words through the tightly shut teeth.

Minato's shoulders relaxed at that- he'd been trying to decide if this was some sort of trap and figuring if it would be best to run off back to camp and come back with ANBU or play into it and figure out where the Kazekage was. He no longer though this was an impostor… but he still didn't like the situation.

'There are some things I needed your opinion on.' he said calmly, taking his time in covering the maybe thirteen steps separating them. He didn't know what was the sparkly yellow thing in the floor, and he also didn't really care, what he did notice was that the redhead seemed to be somehow sweating rivers despite the fact it was the middle of the night and that meant Sunanin holed with as many blankets as they could in the dark night air. '…you haven't been to the camp for the whole day. Is something wrong?'

'Everything's fine.' muttered the man with the same tone and seemed to hunch forward even more 'I just enjoy the silence. It's not like I can…'

For a moment the figure stilled in silence, but after two seconds it resumed the speech.

'…it's not like I can go to such places everyday. What do you need my opinion on?'

'_Everything's fine' my ass_ , Minato thought angrily, hurrying the last few steps and quickly taking the bag off his back and setting it on the floor with a quiet order for Gaara to behave. Then he turned to the redhead and plucked the veil off without asking for permission, since he was sure he wouldn't get it either way.

Under the natural tan of the locals, the redhead's skin had sickly yellowish tint that hardly spoke of good health. All of the sudden the man's constantly worsening humor, the way he slept like if he'd never indulged on such an activity, how he glared at his food and just about everything that they had offhandedly observed in the past weeks make a lot more than sense. At least more than his personal opinion the man had gotten an early start on menopause.

'You shouldn't be alone without ANBU, what if you were attacked like this?' he removed headdress of the rider's suit the man was wearing. His hair was just as sweaty as his face and when he reached to push the dark wet strands sticking to his forehead, he nearly pulled away at the heat the skin was giving off. 'You are sick.'

The man had looked back at him with glassy glare like if he didn't even get that Minato was even talking to him. He didn't pull away or even act like if he felt that Minato touched him. He just… stared in very still position; only faint movement around his chest showed that he still exchanged air within his lungs. And then, like if something hit too hard surface, his face started falling into something that couldn't be called otherwise as hysteric mimic nearing verge of tears just by hair.

'…what do you all people want from me…' he muttered, then turned around slowly to look at his clothes laying in the sand, and as if it sand in material was horrendous crime the redhead started shaking with very badly hidden sobs and sniffs '…why did you take that off? I'm not sick, I don't need your help! Do you think I can't even answer your question you break away from the topic like that?'

'Oh, hey… it's… it's not that bad…' Minato said lamely, looking desperately around for some source of instruction on how to proceed, but since the only company he currently had was reduced to calmly grazing camel and Gaara, who was trying to touch a prickly cacti fruit while the sand formed a ball around the object, his options were rather limited. '…please, stop?'

Minato had never liked to be around people who cried, they kind of got into his nerves since he never did it often, and when he did he had this horrible tendency to get blotchy and he'd been mercilessly teased for it by his cousins most of his childhood. Naruto had gotten him much more used to that, but still was hardly something he'd do willingly if given any option.

If this was someone he got along better with, he'd probably would have hugged them, or gone the soldier way and slapped while demanding for them to get a grip on themselves. Since the man was provably delirious with fever rather than hysteric, there was no saying how would that go and he wasn't going to give it a try just now. The man was obviously sick, so the best course of action was to think as field medic. All shinobi came with the most basic of training on dealing with wounds, but Minato hadn't seen him get hurt at any point and the man was supposed to be vastly more able than he in dealing with anything related to poisons, shouldn't he?

Not knowing what else to do, he tilted his head lightly up so he could have a look at his pupils. Unfortunately, he didn't see any immediate difference between the iris and them.

'Are your eyes always this dark, or are you really, really high?' he asked with slight humor in his voice.

In the answer, the redhead threw a handful of sand at his face, like if he was particularly offended by this statement while he shouted the meaningless sounds (something between 'argh' and 'wah') and got up, only to sit down in the same position a few steps later, finally laying down in embryonic position in the end.

'…stop looking down on me… I am not a disgrace… I did it all for you all… stop it…' clattered through his teeth in litany of murmurs.

Minato sneezed twice in response and quickly brushed as much sand as he could off his hair and face, which mostly seemed to consist on him ruffling at it like a dog to shake fleas off.

'Oh, you ungrateful, melodramatic _ass_!'

The camel chose that moment to snort and nod it's head as if it agreed wholeheartedly with such an opinion, and Minato almost lost it and burst into laughing because- what the hell , this situation was as horrible as it was funny. Unfortunately just thinking about laughing at sick man who couldn't even get back up on his own seemed a little too mean, so instead he picked the few things scattered around and put them back in the camel's pack.

Normally he wouldn't even bother thinking about it, but as the Kazekage had rightfully said, camels were good, faithful animals and didn't really deserve to be stuck in some place where they were likely to get eaten by a pack of hungry jackals or hyenas or hell, even ants. Now that he thought about it, he felt a little glad he'd decide to come on his own. Kazekage eaten by wildlife because he was too stupid to get medical attention? Suna would never live it down.

'Oh, hello there, hi cutie.' he cooed, patting the beasts neck like he would have a horse, then giving the bridal a slight tug to coax the large animal up 'How did this go er… Up! On we go… Sim-Sim-Salabim?…Yip-yip?'

The camel snorted him and he could have sworn rolled its eyes at him.

Not really feeling very appreciative of the criticism and since asking nicely hadn't been all too well received, Minato decided to deal with it like his very own bloody Habanero would have.

'Get the hell up, you lazy beast of burden!' he cried indignantly, taking a step back and giving the thing a sonorous smack in the rump. The large, humped creature immediately sprang to it's feet with a startled grunt and looked at the human as If he had lost all it's marbles.

'Back to camp. You understand?' he pointed at the trail left by his feet 'Follow that and go back to *camp*, and if you are not well on your way when I get going, we are eating you roasted, understood?'

Again, the camel nodded and took several hesitant steps backwards, when Minato glared and took a step forward as if he intended to get a fire going right there and then, the thing let out a panicked cry and turned tail into a fats trot. Minato just hoped it had understood the instructions.

'All right baby, next….' He gave a look first at the toddler, and then at his father, whose gibberish had lowered in volume but not really stopped.

'…right, fever.'

He briefly considered giving the man water, but since they were going to be in movement chances he would get sick were very high, and the distance wasn't so great. If they could make better time than in coming, twenty minutes at the most- but it would probably help if he started it by lowering his temperature.

Four hand seals later, a perfect copy of Minato was picking up both baby and back and adjusting it, to his chest this time.

'Be soft, Gaara.' The real Minato told him seriously 'It's only a few minutes and it's either like this or your zoo to do it for you, I can't carry you both.'

Turning towards the man, he carefully pulled him so he was lying on his back rather than on his side, and reaching for his left hand, bared it all the way to the inside of his elbow.

'Oft.' said Gaara obediently and then put mouth over the shoulder of the clone, wetting it and smoldering with saliva, but not using his teeth on the single strand of material. He liked that kind of carefulness, it was something he could do to be praised, especially as he mastered it quite well so far. Daichi on the other hand groaned at the change of position and turned back to laying on the side, not really trying to take his hand away from the blond.

'What are you doing, you blond, do you think that because you're pretty you can do everything you want, stop disrespecting me, why nobody listens to when I make an order, I'm a leader here, how am I supposed to make it if nobody even wants to listen, agh!'

He shuddered at the seal that lowered his temperature a few degrees and jerked a bit to get up above the sand level. His gaze focused a bit more, but none of the pain induced lines went away.

'What are you doing?' he yelled hysterically, breathing like if he was about to faint from shock 'I don't want your mercy, I don't want your help, let me go!'

'Kazekage-sama.' Minato said calmly as he lowered the sleeves on the left hand and moved to the right one to draw another. 'You have been sick for days and instead of having it quickly treated like an intelligent mednin would have thought of doing, you hid it and came to lick your wounds all alone in the middle of nowhere, barely able to move and with no one to protect you, so, if you were to get killed, kidnapped, or anything like that, all of your village would go in a panic and your guards kill themselves over the shame of not doing their job right.'

He lowered the sleeves on that arm as well and helped the man up first into a sitting position, then tugged him upwards so he would move up.

'Since I can see you are really sick now, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt right now and convince myself this sounded like a good idea because of the high fever. Now you can let me take you back to the camp, where I'm sure your ANBU will be delighted to have the privilege of cowering in your presence since I'm sure they are going to be a whole lot more obedient than I-… or I can knock you out, let Gaara draw on your face with permanent marker, take incriminatory photos, and then deliver you to your ANBU. One of those options is going to be faster. The other will please me immensely, and since the result will be more or less the same to me, this is your call.'

In response, the redhead's gaze wavered dangerously with something that could only be called tears. Without the slightest warning they also started rolling down his cheeks like if suddenly both eyes of the kazekage got infected with something very itchy and allergic. Their owner hiccupped through that no worse than his own child during the not so rare (but rarer lately) tantrums and sat down on the sand just as he was standing.

'So you hate me after all, this is so cruel of you…' he rasped and then hid his face within his hands, crying in a manner nobody in Suna would probably think of him in their wildest dreams 'How can you treat me like thaaat, I took you under my caaareee!'

Minato really didn't want to do this. Not because he didn't really want to- more because he really, really didn't want to. He didn't care for doing it, but this man just seemed like someone who would stab him just for trying, but what the hell. If he was lucky the camel was indeed in its way to the camp and would hopefully alert ANBU so they would come before Gaara decided to eat them both.

'Come on, get up. I don't hate you…' he said in the coaxing, reasonable adult voice he used with Gaara as he once again forced the older man back on his feet. 'Only a Sunanin would think not leaving you to rot here alone and die a sad and lonely death because you refused medical treatment is not caring.' And since it worked with Gaara (and since if this didn't work he really would be out of ideas) he pulled him close into a loose hug.

'There, there.' he reached to ruffle the short, saffron-stem colored strands so they didn't really look much different from his son's recent haircut 'Let' go back to where everyone else is, and you'll feel better once Red Ant treats you.'

'You don't hate me?...' asked the man in shaking, miserable voice that sounded more like if it was coming from a kid than actually an adult. He slowly uncovered his face and looked up, not really leaning into the hug or reacting to the fact there was a hand through his hair. 'You don't care if I rot or not. You would be happy if I would. Everyone would be happy if I died…'

'If I didn't care I would just have left and pretended I never saw anything of that, don't you think?' he said in the same soft, reasonable voice from before. The hair-petting didn't seem to have any effect on the man, unlike Gaara, but he kept doing it all the same. It was a pleasant occupation while he tried to figure out what to do next. 'And your family would be very sad if anything happened to you, so if nothing else, you need to get better for them.'

'My family is a bunch of JERKS!' suddenly the redhead yelled and pushed at the blond, thwacking them both into the sand 'Are you here to mock me? Are you internally laughing at me because you know I've took a liking in you? Why are you so- so-…'

The rest of the speech was suddenly cut off as the man paled and scrambled a few steps away just to start uttering painfully realistic sounds of heavy drying where nothing really came out of his mouth, maybe a few specks of sparkling dust, making him cough. Immediately after that another set of retching hit him, this time making him vomit with something that looked like mud and smelled of rotting wound. He looked at it for a moment and then simply rolled back into embryonic position again.

'If you don't hate me…' he muttered weakly '…what would you do if I kissed you?'

'I am so not going to kiss you after that thing came out of your mouth!' Minato said as he quickly scrambled to his feet and helped the man before he decided to fall on whatever he had just vomited. Oh, this wasn't good. There was something- some organ, some- something rotting inside the Kazekage and they weren't going to spend any more time…

'We are getting back to camp now. You!' the cloned stood to attention 'Get back right now and tell Red Ant to prepare, we are likely going to need to operate immediately, ANBU will know what's protocol in this situation. Gaara, be soft until I get there and you'll get a treat.'

'Treat!' Gaara said and closed his eyes as the clone spun into the run. He didn't like it at first but a few meters further he was fully enjoying the ride, without even trying to gnaw at anything.

Minato turned to the redhead and assessed the situation for a moment- something in stomach, so that immediately ruled slinging him over his shoulder and calling it a day. Carrying him princess style might be vaguely funny if it wouldn't have been so inconvenient when he needed speed, and that only left the obvious.

'Come on now.' he said, turning halfway around and pulling at one the redhead's arms and crouched so the man wouldn't have to move too much to climb easily. 'We need to hurry.'

The redhead for another long moment just stared at the blond's back until he finally climbed up, his movements painfully careful over everytime where he had to move his abdomen. When he finally got to the right position, he just limped on the blond limplessly, letting him carry all the new kilos without any sort of backup.

'Your hair…' he muttered almost unhearably '…they don't smell like woods anymore.'

Minato almost staggered for a moment – the man wasn't small, but he was shorter than him, yet easily outweighed him, how did that even happen? – then grunted and behaved his weight up a bit, holding his legs in place and getting back up.

'Pervert. Let me take a real shower.' he said with a slight smile as he walked down to the path he's started, since it was the flattest route to go 'I'll fix it up right away.'

After taking another moment to make sure the man wasn't going to fall off on him, he broke into a run. Fortunately for everyone involved, the Kazekage wasn't nowhere near as picky with the speeds as Gaara was. As it came, the clone was already in the place once they arrived and eagerly pleased the youngest son of the kage with piece of meat which made Gaara happy to no extent (and just as excited too). Daichi looked at it dully and without a comment, only occasionally groaning once Ants surrounded Minato, taking the man off his back.

'This time he really did it, didn't he.' muttered Vulture as he simply passed by, carrying another set of wood near the fireplace. 'This is going to be a long night.'

'Did the camel make it?' Minato asked as he waited for Gaara to be done with chewing on his treat before giving him a big hug while his replacement dispelled himself. 'I sent it before the clone.'

'I know nothing about camels.' announced the nin looking at the side from where the blond came 'I can go looking for it.'

'I'd be really thankful if you did, Vulture.' the blond said with a slight smile 'I don't want to be in the blame of yet another poor camel lost.'

Both ninja and ANBU left in different directions, Vulture following whatever sense allowed him to track things so easily in the desert, and Minato venturing deeper into what was left of the cities to keep Gaara as far away from his weakened father as possible… Just in case they did need to cut him open on him. Lark and Devil were nowhere to be seen, likely having been dispatched to patrol, a sick Kage generally meant tighter security.

In the end it was lucky the clone arrived the few minutes earlier than he did. The limited rainbow of Ants had enough time to create a sterile field and get all tools ready for said surgery, which involved a lot less of cutting than Minato would have imagined.

When they ended, the kazekage was no less drugged than before, limplessly laying in hands of the Ants as women moved the body from the operating field to the sterilized bed in the standing houses. He didn't seem to mind the fact now he has additional tube attached to his abdomen but finally his face loses traces of pain that seemed to be attached to him permanently for last few days. Gaara also noticed it, curious about the add on as he tries to sneak closer to look at it a few times, but as everytime one of ANBU simply stood on his path, he just kept pretending it wasn't in his interests at all. Daichi didn't notice this also.

'There was no need to perform surgery.' the Red Ant said in tone cautiously balanced between amusement and mocking. Minato knew it well enough from his time working with Tsunade, the 'oh, your poor little alarmist, were you scared?' sort of tone. 'The infection should be treated easily enough once we are done with the draining. He will have to remain down and be fed through an IV for a few days, but other than that, his life isn't at any risk unless he develops some complication.'

'Really…?' the blond asked with slight disappointment, When he could *feel* the glare the woman sent him, he quickly corrected himself. 'No, I mean that's great, of course… I just wondered because he really looked like crap and who knows how long was he hiding it-'

'Our Kazekage wasn't hiding his illness, Hokage-sama. He was treating it.'

'Treating it, of course.' the blond said agreeably. 'Was it working…?'

There was a long pause from the stiff figure.

'I'm sure the procedure would have been significantly more dangerous if he hadn't.' she finally said neutrally. And Minato was versed enough in politic answers to know that this meant it would also have been a lot better if he had just told them he was sick when the thing started, not that any of the fanatical underlings of this man would ever think of saying anything so openly critical towards their master.

Minato wondered what it would be like to have such perfect obedience from his soldiers… He couldn't remember ever taking an important decision that hadn't been challenged by someone. Probably rather boring, not to mention all the chances to correct faulty plans that sprung from discussions.

'If he's going to need rest to recuperate, shouldn't you take him to that summer house they were planning to go to?' he asked, pulling his necklace away from Gaara's prying hand. Piranha teeth meant the toddler had lost all and every necklace-munching privileges. 'It would probably be more comfortable for him.'

'We can't light lamp until Kazekage-sama orders it.'

'Of course…' and he had a pretty good idea of what the man would say. _How dare you try to imply I'm so weak I need to lie in embroiled cushions? I am the Kazekage of Suna, I do not abandon missions over a little infection, I've lead wars with worse than this! Will you never stop insulting me?_

He wondered if at the end of that he'd call him pretty and try to sniff his hair again.

'Are you having some sort of amusing thought, Hokage-sama?' Red Ant's clipped, suspicious tone just made Minato's smile widen.

'Why yes. Yes I am.'

Gaara looked up at the expression in curiosity, then simply put his, still smelling with meaty stench fingers into his mouth and started licking them while sand tried to cooperate with holding the fingers at the right distance from teeth.

The Kazekage spent the night in half-dreaming state through which he had been muttering vast sentences and words almost without a stop. At some point Gaara even tried to repeat them, but as it gave no meaning to anything, he simply gave up at 'retribution'. One of the ANBU had been going back and forth between inside and outside the room, checking on the state the man was put in. At the dawn, finally the redhead woke up ad greeted with a packet of new drugs he quietly fell into sweet prayarese as he kept on moving his hands through his fingers and repeating ancient sunnah words. At the question of Thorny Devil of moving out he simply uttered with softly, sweetish tone 'summer house? I love summer house.' and agreed to whatever his soldiers had been asking him, which gave them completely new range of movement. As it seemed, during the night, the Kazekage turned either senile or stupid and nobody minded.

Minato was under the suspicion they kept him that way because if they lowered the dosage he'd be up and trying to get himself into an early ditch again (turn out the man had pancreatitis an apparently hadn't felt this was something that might have concerned his underlings), but at least it made the man a lot more bearable, especially since in his weakened state it was easier to bring Gaara around him. The blond wasn't one to let opportunities go, so the sooner he broke Gaara of his fear of the man the better. Since whatever of that icky brown substance Red Ant had collected from the man's pancreas didn't' seem to smell anywhere like blood if the baby's disgusted reaction the moment it caught a whiff of it was anything to go, it seemed safe enough.

Minato, who had hit a ditch on regards of the sealing on the circle, decided to just send the message to Suna explaining in detail what were the effects and the problems with it and dedicated himself exclusively to try and coax Gaara into crawling. Since he no longer lay on his back just staring at things and rolled, instead choosing to sit himself up, Minato saw no reason why he shouldn't be able to. The only problem was that Gaara insisted in being a very cute and very lazy and very frustrating baby. Before, every time he put him on his stomach to try to coax him to push himself up, he'd roll on his back and ask to be picked.

Now he had evolved. Now he pushed himself up with the developing muscles on his arms, put one leg under himself, repeated the action with the other… And sat comfortable up and asked to be picked.

'You know what, I don't believe for a moment you are incapable of crawling, Gaara.' he told the toddler seriously 'I think you just want to have me at your back and call for the rest of your days.'

'Mii!' answered Gaara affectingly and rose his hands up toward him, obviously loving him before he ever had chance to pick him up.

'No. No Gaara, you have to work for this, this is a matter of teamwork, and since I've invested a lot of patience in this, it's your turn to put some effort. This is an order, and since I outrank you, you have to obey. This is final.'

He didn't move an inch from the maybe six feet that separated them and instead sat don and extended his arms.

'Now come here, on your own.'

'Mii, ome ere.' said Gaara instead and fell forward on his hands, extending one of it toward Minato 'Mii…'

Slowly, he changed his hands, making one almost invisible step forward, but he didn't want to move much further. The older redhead let out a small merry laugh from affair, but he didn't seem to be even watching the scene.

'Good to see you find this amusing.' Minato groaned and buried his head on his face. He thought of telling him how much he sounded like his grandmother when he did that, but quickly decided against it, focusing his attention back on the child.

'No, 'Mii', no 'come here' nothing!' the blond said as he pointed at the baby ''Gaara' come here, and he come here now.'

'Gaara come here?' repeated the child in confused tone, then patted the place in front of him… and moved right there. 'Gaara here.' he announced simply.

'This is ridiculous…' muttered the other redhead and finally looked down at the pair, obviously shaking from laughter. The only thing that seemed to be out of the picture was how his pupils seemed to be heavily glazed over and unfocused. 'Gaara, Gaara, go there, don't be such a pain…'

Baby looked back at the man, a bit surprised he was called from that side, but he reverted back to looking at Minato. Minato also turned to look at the man, surprised by the fact he was calling his son by name, which he had only witnessed… Well, he was sure he had called him by name on some other occasion than besides when he was introduced, but for the life of him he couldn't think of any.

'How did you convince your other kids to learn to crawl?' he asked cautiously, as if he doubted the man's intentions 'Because I tried with seasoned meat, and he only snatches it with sand and gobbles it up.'

The man uttered yet another set of laughter and turned around to look at his fingers. Somehow, his own rings that never changed since the day one seemed to be fascinating him.

'How, how did I do it?...' he said and laughed again 'I don't know, I think I wasn't there…'

And he laughed once again, like if missing out on vital points of his own children growing up was something sweet and funny.

'You know, I have the feeling whatever you are on is a lot better quality that the drugs I was put under last time I was in the hospital…' Minato raised an eyebrow at this, but he also smiled a little. 'Maybe I should get appendicitis next time.'

The redhead only looked back at him and flashed him a full set smile like if he was both sharing and hiding secret from him and then he looked down with the same expression toward the smaller redhead. Gaara didn't look back, having his eyes settled only on Minato, but that seemed to make Daichi even more happy. Quickly, like if out of curiosity, the man moved one of his fingers, making the plush toy that lied a few meters away twitch with the right paw. Gaara looked at it and then looked back to Minato, which made the Kazekage let out another batch of giggles as he put two hands into motions this time. Quietly, teddy 'Ady' turned toward Gaara and started waving to him, only to start moving away at minimal speed. That finally caught Gaara's attention as he looked back at it, more and more surprised. The child let out a squeal without a real meaning and moved his hand toward it, of course, not catching the plush at all. This time the plush simply repeated the gesture and that finally put Gaara into motion, made him slowly but hastily crawl toward the toy in wonder. In answer, Daichi laughed again and pushed the toys slightly to the side, making the distance a bit further. He seemed to be having fun with it like a five years old and wasn't behaving much differently from it too.

Minato stared while the man, for lack of better term, 'fished' his son out of his sitting paralysis and made him crawl after slowly moving piece of plush. It took him several moments to figure out the dryness on his mouth came from the unusual gaping he was doing, and he quickly closed his mouth with a quiet snap and turned towards the older man.

'That was… that's…' he gestured towards still moving plush toy, without looking away from the older man. 'I… Thank you.'

The redhead slowly looked back from the toy that he still kept moving with his fingers and looked at Minato with quite a cheery expression. Oh, Minato thanked him. That was so funny.

'Kiss me.' he said simply.

And just like that, the blond's awed expression changed to the more usual (at least to anyone but the Kazekage) friendly amusement.

'I think *I'd* need to be very high for that.'

That only got another set of giggles out of the drugged man as he went back to playing with plush and making Gaara follow it until he caught it, like if nothing's happened.

'…I wonder…' he muttered once Gaara finally caught one of the back paws of the plush '…I often wonder how your lips taste.'

'I'm sure you also wonder how my liver tastes like.' the blond countered offhandedly, picking both impressed baby and dispossessed Teddy and tossing him a few inches on the air before hugging both close. 'You look like if you'd like to eat them every time I do something you don't agree with. Which more or less always.'

'Your liver?' another set of giggles, this time more or less hysterical, showing that the man didn't really have control over what he did 'No, I just want to have sex with you…'

'And sniff my hair and squeeze my wounds until I want to cry.' the blond added in good humor, reaching with a hand to pat the man's head slightly- he did promise Lark he would take care of the man while he went to take a rest, he didn't want him to get agitated.

'There are lots of pretty blonds in Suna, have sex with them.'

The redhead didn't miss a beat and caught the given hand in a grasp. It wasn't hard or demanding – more, it was gentle and endearing, so unlike the usual posture of the Kazekage. Slowly, he let go of the hand even like that, brushing his fingers up the forearm to the moment he could reach without really changing position.

'Oh no, I want you…' he muttered in sweetish tone 'You're so pretty, boy, I want to take care of you…'

Minato laughed, blushing a little more of how funny the situation was rather than actual embarrassment, though it made the freckles on his face stand out all the same.

'So you can adopt me?' he said, obviously not having forgotten the conversation they had had over Roadrunner what seemed like so many weeks ago 'I'm sorry, seal master pays well enough I don't need to consider career change to 'personal bitch''

'No, no, just sex…' muttered the redhead, staring at him like at some sort of prettified beauty image, then let out another giggle 'Personal bitch, that's so vulgar!'

And then he laughs and laughs and laughs, until he finally runs out of breath, even if it seems he cannot do that anymore.

'…give me a kiss.' he said again, looking at the blond like at high prized candy.

Yes, he'd had people who promised him the world, who'd offered him their metaphorical heart in a silver tray, who had suggested to him the most scandalous propositions… and people who said nothing at all, neither yes nor no.

He wondered when was that going to stop hurting.

'Not interested.' Minato smiled (a little more fake this time) and held Gaara up to illustrate his point 'Feel free to kiss this baby instead, he'll appreciate it a lot more than I.'

Daichi looked back at Gaara who seemed to get a bit unhappy on the fact that he did and… surprise, he laughed again.

'What? No way.' he said between giggles 'I don't want to kiss Gaara, I want to kiss you.'

Minato put the baby back in his lap and gave the older man a thoughtful look.

'And here I thought Sunians liked them young…? Well, that's somewhat reassuring, as far as you tastes go.' He rested one arm on his knee, cupping his chin as he looked at the older man thoughtfully. It seemed whatever they were giving him had him in an incredibly good mood. And by that he meant 'so high he might as well not remember half of what he's saying now', which in any shinobi's book meant prime time to extract as many truth as one had enough to wrestle out of the victim.

'Why not?' he asked in a soft tone 'Not just kissing. Why are you so against it when I tell you to hold him? You know you need Gaara to trust you, but you never want to touch him, and it's obvious it's not out of fear, because when you have to, you always pick him up.'

'Why would I want to force myself on someone who doesn't want to do anything with me?' said Daichi happily, once again getting back to watching sparkles on his rings 'Gaara is such a wild child, so socially awkward, so aggressive, so… he is such a devil.'

'Does he look aggressive when he's with me?' the blond asked calmly 'Give me that hand.'

'It's a mischief! A joke!' exclaimed the man with a wide smile and looked back at the blond. 'Oh, he will kill you when you will expect it the least… you never have enough eyes to watch your back.'

Only then, after looking back at his hands again he slowly lowered one of them and gave it to Minato, not even looking away from his other palm. Minato shook his head and reached for it, holding it on his own for a moment. He looked at it like if he were measuring a kunai, taking on the roughened tips of every shinobi who handled weapons (somehow twice as rough in this man), the brutally short yet well kept nails, the multitude of tiny scars of getting cut on one's own kunai, of calling on summons with teeth and blades and anything that could draw blood. There were two pale marks around his fingers, but he had no way of knowing they were from where they had been reattached months ago, just noted them with a soft, careful brush of fingers.

Gold rings shone on the man's hand, most thick to the point he wondered how the man expected to use them on a fight, since they were bound to cut him as much as whoever he decided to attack. Some had some sort of weird beige stone that looked to be made of pressed sand, but he saw no wedding band. Not that it mean much… in the end, wedding bands usually were used by civilians, Minato's mother herself, who had abandoned life as a shinobi had lost twice before solving the matter by using it in a necklace rather than her fingers.

'Don't do anything stupid.' he said, pulling at the hand slowly closer and keeping it at baby hand's reach of the toddler, golden rings in display and the hand relaxed, like one would when approaching an unfamiliar dog.

'Be **soft**, Gaara.' he muttered softly, leaning a bit and dropping a small kiss on the crown of the baby's head. The redhead looked up at Minato's face, obviously wanting to see every kiss the blond gave him, including the source, process and consequences… or maybe just wanting to get more as staring in silence usually gave better effects than squealing (so far maybe the redhead's brain wasn't top evolutionized when it came to intelligence, but by far he noticed that when he didn't try very hard usually made blond try harder, so when he sat quietly there was bigger probability of blond trying to kiss him to find out what was that he wanted instead of doing something completely different because 'kiss' sounded exactly like 'this' and 'whiz'). He quickly got back his attention to the being in front of him even if he didn't really get another kiss, as the hand he knew he could recognize and as much as Daichi did absolutely nothing to show his usual hostile behavior, Gaara knew it better – and disliked it all the same.

'Off.' he muttered obediently, but his face slowly showed something bordering tension and frown as he reached the hand out (very slowly) and before he had even touched the tip of bigger finger he put it back into the previous position. The man had only glanced toward the side and flashed his teeth at the kid and rose his hand higher.

'This one is a gold stone.' he explained, very on topic. Reality seemed to be a thing of a choice to him lately. 'I have blue and green one too, they look like candies.'

'It looks like pressed sand.' Minato commented, reaching up to take the hand and briefly brushing the other one against the smooth, sparkly piece of… rock, he supposed. Since Gaara was hesitant about it, he thought maybe showing it was okay to touch would serve as positive reinforcement or something. He continued to play 'inspection' with the different ones the man had in his hand in hopes that, if nothing else, it would spike the baby's interest.

'…you really like rings, don't you?' he commented with a light smile as the man added owning more than the ones he carried right now. It reminded him of his own tastes for necklaces - or more like, obsession. He loved necklaces and he loved buying pendants and chains for them - as a general rule, he changed them daily depending on his mood, but he couldn't remember when was the last time he had changed the one he wore now.

It had been the first one Setsuna had left out for him with the change of clothing he got when he left the hospital back in Konoha and he just… hadn't bothered either taking it off or even looking through the hopeless mass of knot and tangles that usually was his jewelry box for anything new one. Which sucked, because all of the sudden he had the horrible compulsion to wear something bright and flashy- preferably that overly-bright turquoise jasper he had bought back in Mist… He just noticed now how very much it suited the shade of Naruto's eyes.

'What did you think of my son?'

'It's sand, everything that is a glass, is sand.' said the man and took the hand back with a light chuckle, looking back at what was left on it. Slowly, he lowered the other palm and licked through the jewelery like if they were made of sugar, leaving a faint yellow color upon his lips. Strangely, the rings looked like if they were smudged by the act alone and smooth surface got a little more scratched. Gaara looked at that with half of interest and half of annoyance, not knowing why Minato decided to pay so much attention to the hand he had bad memories attached with. He bounced inside the hold to express both, ignorant of the ever posed question.

'Ah, Naruto…' said the kazekage and set into the fit of drunken giggles 'Such an active, fresh blood. Charming personality.'

'Oh, wow. I really wish you hadn't said those words while you did that…' The blond reached for the hand and brought it back, inspecting the flesh 'So, you not only retch gold all the time, your saliva also melts it?' he asked, remembering the patches of golden yellow back at the oasis. 'Look, Gaara.' he stroked the smudged gold, not terribly surprised when it stayed solid for him. '…Naru's an Uzumaki, they are the definition for 'active'. What did he do to make you like him so much, won a fight with one of your ninja scorpions?'

Gaara looked back at the hand and observed as Minato played with it, slowly getting more and more interested with glinting reflexes the surface of rings posed, no matter what kind of state they were in. The older redhead a bit slowed down with his constant movement and also his giggles slowly relaxed and quieted down.

'Oh yeah, such a pretty… merry baby…' he muttered and chuckled under his nose, smiling to his own memory of Naruto. The baby was not only definition of active, it was also definition of what was lacking in his life. A good healthy and curious newborn that could change expressions just as wildly as the way of talking. It was something different from his ever obedient and quiet children that either growled or sat in the corners doing everything to stay invisible. 'Pretty smile… he is so fat…'

Gaara finally, very hesitantly, reached out toward one of the rings and patted it, waiting for it to explode in his face. When nothing of such happened, he slowly lied down in the hold and started making bubbles from saliva, watching the reflexes of the rings without hiding his interest.

'Fat!' for some reason this adjective seemed to be of some sort of importance because the blond emitted the closest thing anyone above the age of eight could make by crossing hysterical giggling with a choked off squeal. There was a completely unusual gleam of pure happiness when Minato leaned closer 'Let me guess… his face is round like a tomato?'

'Like a tomato.' said Daichi, agreeing to it with bit of surprise. Somehow it didn't come to him when he watched the kid, but not it made the perfect sense. 'It's chubby on the sides… and covered in blush.'

This obviously was the right answer because Minato grinned at the man, for once not with contempt or sarcasm or even amusement. He gave his hand a squeeze, as if the Kazekage had done something to be thanked over, then looked down at the baby in his arms and squeezed him close.

It had been weeks since he'd seen Naruto last, but just hearing he had started looking more like his mother made Minato wish he could just get up, run all the way back to the city and hug the living daylights out of his son. He'd noticed (also known as 'told himself') that Naruto had Kushina's eyes, which provably would have been true, if nothing else because of their shape. Then again, he was just a baby, who knew what he'd look like growing up?

Minato secretly hoped it would be a lot more like Kushina. Since he'd also hoped Naruto would turn out to be a girl, he wasn't very sure if that didn't actually make his chances lower.

'Oh, hey, there's Sunnah in this one…' focusing again on the rings, he brought one closer to inspect the minuscule etchings all over the metal. Unlike the other's, this one hadn't brushed off when the man had licked it.

'Sa Ba… Your family's name? What's with the inverted 'E's? I saw them before in some of the things Wren showed me.'

'Oh no, don't touch it…' said the man and slowly twiddled his fingers out Minato's hands 'It's my master's… wax approval…'

Which probably meant that if anything, it suited for smashing the thing into the safety wax just as a minuscule stamp. He himself used it occasionally, but not very much so, usually just sealing the paper with a simple stun jutsu, that would put anyone down if they weren't meant to read the thing. It was more of a sentimental bling than a real value. He looked at it under the faint light and smiled toward it, like if it was pretty or unusual. Then he simply took it off his fingers.

'You want it?' he said, dropping it on Minato's hands. He didn't really wait for the answer.

'Even if I wasn't sure you'd accuse me of stealing it later….' Minato turned the surprisingly heavy piece of gold around, showing it to Gaara but not really letting it go- this just looked small enough to be swallowable- 'I don't really wear rings. But thank you.'

He smiled.

'You are surprisingly pleasant when you are drugged like this, can't you be this nice more often?'

Gaara looked at it with interest and indeed, tried to take it into his mouth, but his moves were rather lazy in comparison to how he usually did with such things. He didn't like the smell. Daichi just chuckled under his nose, still playing with his fingers, but then something changed and he slowly laid his fingers down. He kept on watching the ceiling with that sweet, unphantomable smile, but his pupils slowly widened, spreading through his eyes like a stain from broken ink.

'I'm drugged?...' he asked, then turned toward Minato, his voice dancing on the edge of laugh and panic 'I'm drugged?...'

Minato's smile dimmed hesitantly at that.

'Um… a little? You do have a tube coming out of your side, that would kinda hurt without some anesthetic…?'

How could the man not know it? Hadn't he mentioned it just moment ago? The redhead slowly turned his head down to look at the thick tube he had been completely ignoring until now and to travel up with the way it went until he saw the drip bag. He seemed to be more absent than present with the way his thoughts went. The small, dreamy smile still danced upon his lips. Slowly, he traced the thing with one finger, until he touched the bag and then he went back to his hand, obviously tracing from where one thing started and the other ended. He started laughing again.

'I know…' he said through the giggles 'I know, you just think I don't know…'

Then, slowly, he started undoing the tube , taking it out from his vein with slow, delicate precision.

'Hey- hey, no! Nonono- bad Kage, put that down, you are not supposed to touch it!'

Augh, what had he done now? He didn't think anyone could blame him for having assumed the man would notice a drip bag of liquid happy sticking right on his vein, but he wouldn't put it pass the ANBU accompanying them to try to do it anyway. Quickly pulling Gaara next to him so he could lean closer, he reached for the man's hands and tried to stop him from what he was doing without jolting around too much, not wanting the man to accidentally break the needle.

'Would you stop that?'

Daichi, indeed, stopped with what he was doing, only to brush his fingers affectionally across the fingers of the blond. If he had a bit quicker way of thinking he'd probably try to grab the hand, but he didn't. He just smiled again at it.

'Are you with them…?' he asked and looked up, completely shamelessly looking at Minato with the look that was surely not appropriate 'Are you with them too, pretty boy?...'

'Minato.'

That name seemed to shake the man off a bit from the state he was in. He looked at the blond again, his gaze more focused and unfriendly, but it quickly melted within the previous mood. Without another word, he bended down and started removing the needle again.

'Would you please stop that?' the blond asked, once again trying to swap at the man's hands ineffectively 'You are only going to have it until tomorrow anyway, can't you just sit back and enjoy for a little while?'

Or just wait and do it when whoever came next to baby-sit him could deal with it, either was fine with man once again stopped, looking down at hands that effectively brushed his hand off and looked back at the blond, his gaze lost.

'Enjoy…' he muttered, slowly getting back into the relaxed and happy expression 'Enjoy what?...'

Then, as if he had gave up, he simply laid down again, smiling at the ceiling. But he didn't try playing with his fingers again. Minato stayed where he was for a moment, not really trusting the man not to be trying to play him off or anything similar, but as he really did seem to have momentarily forgotten.

'The fact you can sit back and relax a bit? You provably need it.' Now that he looked at it, it was amazing what a single day of the man dropping his usual expression- which seemed to come in limited arrays of frowning, yelling angrily, sulking or plain stressing- had done for smoothing out the hard lines in his brow and corners of mouth. Minato found himself once again remembering the fact the Kazekage was only a few years older than he himself was, regardless of how he acted.

'Think of it as an unscheduled vacation. You can go back to ruling with iron fist as soon as you are done.'

'Vacation.' said the man slowly, with a bit widened smile 'I like having vacation. It's so calm.'

Slowly, the man breathed the air deeper, something that could be understandable on the shore of the sea, but not really in the middle of the dry desert.

'Do you like vacation? Do you think we could spend them together?...'

Minato sighed at the change in topic and leaned back on his arm, rolling the Kazekage's ring idly back and forth between his hands, the dim sunlight catching on the inverted E's.

'If I had vacations… I probably wouldn't know what to do with them. ' he muttered absently.

He hadn't have vacations since he had become Hokage, and even if he, by chance, managed to get a day off, he had to spend it sneaking around behind everyone's back just to spend some time with Kushina. He didn't like that at all, but she hadn't minded (or so she'd said) , but Minato had never liked being anyone's dirty little secret and he would never have asked it from someone he loved… Unfortunately, it had been for her own safety and there hadn't been a way around it.

'…I guess I'd spend them training my student, or with my friends-' neither of which was an option any longer '…or traveling with sensei…' not something he a) could any longer do, either, b) not something he'd want to partake in any moment soon from now since he didn't even want to think if Jiraiya right now, much less spend long amount of times with no one but him for company.

'… I guess I could just call it a day and say that since I'm not being directly or indirectly responsible for bankruptcy, new wars, massive genocide or sending child soldiers to their early graves, these are my vacations. And look, we are already spending them together. Hurrah.'

Everything he wanted he got in the end - things like becoming Hokage, starting a family, knowing Naruto was safe and hell, he even got that cute little red-haired baby he'd been hoping for so much. Life had indeed delivered for Namikaze Minato. It wasn't anyone's fault its sense of humor leaned heavily for 'understated sadism'.

'…do you know what it's like to be constantly trying to do the right thing and just… never having it come out right, no matter how hard you try or what you need to sacrifice to get it?'

Of course, the path to hell was paved with good intentions. They just felt like if they were shards of broken glass.

Daichi didn't look like if he heard half of what was said to him, as he simply just laid there, staring at the shaded brown ceiling and smiled to himself – something that looked even goofy at the given situation, but then, all the more freaky at the same time. Gaara sounded his presence with simple 'oh' as he looked down and up, searching for something more interesting than motionless man whom he still didn't like but whom he could brush off as harmless at the given moment. The corner of lips of Daichi twitched, looking like if something nipped at his skin, but he didn't even blink. His pupils still looked like if they were twice as big their usual size, almost covering the whole, not very big space of the whites. Slowly, they moved toward the blond, looking at him and looking like if he looked through him at the same time.

'…this is not funny.' he muttered, his voice calm but somewhat not joyful at the very least. 'What are you playing at? I'm not your priest… and this is no vacations.'

'Wrong.' Minato smiled. And unlike the one he'd given him before, this *was* the usual, sarcastic and venom-filled smile the Kazekage would find much more familiar. 'It is funny. You just can't appreciate the irony of it.'

'I probably can't…' said the redhead like if he were thinking about something hard, but his gaze was empty enough to signalize that even if he tried, it didn't give much results '…you have blue eyes.'

'…yes, I do. And this is the second most stimulating conversation I've had with a Sabaku.'

One would think that talking with a drugged Kazekage would be more entertaining. So far, letting the man lead the conversation hadn't done wonders for his mood.

'Why do you think your family are jerks? You have cute and obedient kids, one would think you'd be happy about that.'

'Uh…' said the redhead, for once seeming to want to frown, but letting go of this as he slowly got up on his elbows, then almost fell off the bed when he reached for one of his shoes. When he finally brought it up, he seemed to be unable to remember what he wanted to do with it, so he just stared at it with confused expression. Only when Gaara piped up at the fact the object was in the range of his sight he seemed to remember that he wanted to actually throw it at Minato, but after a second of sitting with it in the air, he simply let his hand fall down. Slowly, his gaze focused on Gaara, who observed everything with – maybe not the most pinpointed – but still, interest.

'Third Kazekage is the most awesome of the masters…' he muttered, letting go of the shoe and smiling reluctantly again, this time with a smile that would put a teenage dreaming girl to shame. Slowly, he reached out his hand toward Gaara, making the kid widening his eyes and backing away toward Minato as much as he could. After a second thought, the hand moved toward Minato's head, touching his face with fingertips. At this point the man seemed to be confused about what to do next '…yeah. He is not a… not a… jerk. My kids are not… jerks.'

Minato noted with approval that Gaara was crawling instead of moving with sand and that he also sought him for protection instead of pushing at his father away, so he jut picked him back up and put him in his lap again, wrapping arms lightly around the tiny shoulders. Aw, the man had had a crush on his sensei. Not precisely unusual (Minato sometimes felt like he was the freak since practically everyone he knew had gone through that phase at one moment or other), but still, something rather unexpected if one took in consideration who it came from.

He jerked a bit when the fingers touched him, but they were far away from his eyes and didn't really feel aggressive, so he hesitantly let them in place. If nothing else, he wanted to show Gaara this sort of touch was 'safe'.

'Who are the jerks, then?'

The man smiled a bit wider, then let his fingers travel down the face, until they hit the chin and slowly lost the touch as he tried to move toward the neck. Minato was asking him pretty hard questions right now. He knew he had answers for them, but for now everything felt a bit mushy and a bit wooly, so he couldn't really tell what kind of answer he would really want to give.

'I don't know. Should there be any jerks?' he asked, like if he was asking for the rule of a gameplay, then he looked down at the kid again. Gaara looked back, his face full of frown. The kid was confused about what was going on, but he knew that nothing good usually came from the man's touch, so he didn't even try to act friendly now. 'Why is it glaring at me like that?...'

'Must be your friendly and charming personality.' The blond said quickly, pulling away while rubbing at some weird spot the man had just accidentally touched in his neck. It made a shiver go down his spine in the most uncomfortable of ways. 'Have you ever given him a reason to smile at you?'

Sure, Gaara didn't really smile yet, but Minato insisted he had seen the corners of his mouth lift a bit. Sometimes. Very sporadically. 'Maybe if you ever thought of having interactions with him not reduced to yelling and grabbing him like a rabbit you plan to skin...'

'But he is my kid, isn't he?...' mused Daichi, like if he was for once thinking over if the thing in front of him really shared blood with him 'I do the best for my kids…'

The sentence broke over as the man looked at Gaara with uncertainty, something not matching swimming through his eyes, but not really hitting the surface.

'He looks so hostile.' he assumed in the end with resignation and lied down on elbow, watching the child like fish in aquarium. For once he rose his hand and tried to get it close to Gaara but the child almost glued his back to Minato in distress. The man lowered his hand down slowly 'Oh, I hate your hate, who do you think is on your side if not me, huh…'

Finally he looked up at Minato. He seemed to slowly lose his happy mood along with how empty the drip bag seemed to be.

'Such a deaf kid.' he stated finally like if it was answer to every posed question.

_Such a deaf adult_, the blond thought, but didn't say out loud, shaking his head lightly. Gaara trusted Minato and seemed to magnanimously tolerate the usual ANBU but what reasons did he have to trust his father. The ANBU at least only acted hostile when they had good reason for it, otherwise left Gaara alone. The Kazekage, on the other hand, seemed to barely lose an opportunity to sneer at the baby.

'He is your kid.' Minato agreed, and without asking reached again for the hand not being used to prop the man up. This time he brought it up palm up. 'Kazekage-sama.' he announced loudly and somewhat theatrically as he edged closer to the man. 'Be **soft** to Gaara.'

He didn't let go of the man's hand this time, just left it a few inches away from where the baby was, well within comfortable reach and used his own thumb to brush the palm in a light caress.

Daichi looked at Minato a bit surprised, his smile rising up once again, but this time more reluctantly, showing that if anything, the redhead was pretty unsure of the method. Given how harsh his hands were, it was possible he barely remembered how to be 'soft'. Gaara seemed to know this the best.

He seemed to recognize good intentions of Minato as he didn't really back off further (not that he had room to do so) but he very clearly and openly glared at it, giving it no vote of trust even if it was surrounded by something he trusted almost without logic. Sure, it was the hand he could recognize as 'the best from the worst' as when it came to the most dangerous and helpless situations in his life, it showed up to save the day, unlike the rough hands of bland masks, but that still didn't make it any more good. He couldn't forget the tortures that it put him through, some of them containing bright light, some filled with atrocious smells or sharp tugging and thus, couldn't forgive it for being here, in the place where he finally felt at peace – free and safe at last. That's why he just sat there and kept glaring at the fingers, not making any effort to get closer to it, while the kazekage slowly felt how the hand in the air got heavier and heavier.

'Hello…' he said to the kid quietly, but it was more a parody of what a parent would say to kid, because it was already filled with resignation and too quiet for the kid to even get what he said. He smiled, but if anything, the smile seemed to be plastic and unnatural. Minato observed the exchange the same way an interrogator looked at its prey for any sign of weakness. He couldn't say he was surprised, but he did want Gaara to give his father a chance, so it was great that the man was trying at all. It was only too bad it was probably because of the drugs and he'd never be able to convince him to do it again once he regained his senses.

'Gaara?' he said, using his free hand to brush the silky red spikes 'Be polite. When someone greets you, you say 'hello' back.'

Gaara looked up at Minato, but his frown merely lessened only to get back to the previous look as he looked back at the man. Quietly, he shifted a bit to the side, straying away from the touch and giving Daichi again an open glare.

'He is so angry-' started Daichi, only to be interrupted with loud 'ada-da-da!' from Gaara that seemed to be only filled with annoyance. Slowly, the tension grew.

'He just needs a bit of positive reinforcement.' Minato said, picking the baby up and holding him to his chest. 'Gaara, if you have something to say, say it. You know we understand you better when you speak.'

Not that the couple dozen words the baby used managed much of a dictionary, but Minato still kept pushing him to both try and make sentences and encourage him to speak as much as possible. The redhead only squeaked up in the response and looked at Minato with the gentler version of frown, only to grow more hostile as he looked at Daichi. Then, simply he moved his head to the other side and relaxed – obviously, the things he couldn't see stopped existing for him. Daichi quietly laid down, losing interest in the kid in pretty similar way, but without a smile this time.

'I regret…' he said, but he left the thought unfinished, as he looked to be torn between the ideas.

'Don't. We'll try again later, it's no big deal.' Minato said, giving the lax hand a light pat and a smile. 'He didn't attack you with sand, that's good enough for now. Why don't you try to rest? I need to talk a few things over ANBU.'

The redhead looked at the blond with another surprise, but obediently turned to the side, pushing the hand under the healing wound. It seemed that it slowly started getting back to life. The other redhead once again turned his head to observe the man at the safe distance now, this time just taking note of the fact the danger seemed to be pushed away. Blank mask of Lark looked inside the house unasked and vanished just as it showed up. The way the shadow moved implied that the man wasn't completely calm.


End file.
